2023-2024第二学期作文训练四——读后续写

2023-2024第二学期高二英语作文训练（四）——读后续写
By Cai Linlin
续写原文：
Every girl dreams and Jasmine is no exception. When Jasmine was young, she had read dozens of books on how to be a ballerina（芭蕾舞者）, Suan Lake was her favorite and she had always wanted to become the white swan in it. Later, she started taking ballet lessons and all her teachers confirmed she was a good student. In the hope of becoming a great ballerina, she trained hard on a daily basis.
One day, she saw an advertisement that a famous ballerina troupe（舞团）would be performing in her hometown. And the whole town was talking about the troupe leader, who was said to be the best ballet dancer in the world. Her thoughts ran wild. "I must meet the leader of the troupe and show him my skills" she murmured to herself.
She dressed herself in her best ballerina costume and managed to slip in the backstage without being noticed. To her luck, the leader entered the dressing room and she timidly knocked at the door "Come in" said a gentle voice. Opening the door, Jasmine saw a tall and slim man with a calm look on his face. She bravely approached him and handed him a bunch of red roses and in her excitement the thorns pricked（刺痛）her hand but she did not pay much attention to the pain.
The leader observed her action as she told him her dream. "Alright, you dance and I will give you my advice."
But half way through the dance he stopped her and said, "I'm sorry you're not good enough!" On hearing this, Jasmine's eyes opened wide in shock. It was seconds before she could absorb what was said to her, "Not good enough?!" she asked in disbelief. "Yes, not good enough." replied the leader. Boiled in shame and rage, Jasmine ran out of the dressing room as fast as her legs could carry her. The leader's words were a huge blow to her confidence. Despite being so sad, she didn't give up her dream.
注意：1. 续写词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

➢Paragraph 1 ：Six months later, she heard that the same ballet troupe was performing in her town again.
➢Paragraph 2：Within three years, Jasmine had become a famous ballerina as she wanted.
附：读后续写微技能——语言（对话）描写
一、概述
一个人的言行能反映一个人的态度和思想品质。

因此，必要的对话能烘托故事中人物的形象。

但是，在读后续写写作中要把握对话描写的分寸:
①对话描写必须为推动故事情节服务，是情节发展的一个环节，每段出现一两句即可;
①对话描写必须反映人物的心理与情感，有利于刻画人物的性格;
①对话描写不宜过长，侧重口语化词汇，避开生僻词汇;
①对话描写要尽可能结合动作描写，明确说话对象，使内容具有画面感;
①对话描写中要学会使用感叹词，表达说话人的喜、怒、哀、乐等情绪。

除此之外，描写对话还要注意对话标签的使用位置以及如何做到使对话标签灵动、传神。

二、使用“对话”标签/正确使用标点符号
(1)说话人+说话内容
“说”后用逗号，引号内第一个字母大写，句尾标点符号放在引号内。

He said,“You are my best friend!”
(2)说话内容+说话人
陈述句引号内用逗号，引号外第一个字母小写:疑问句或感叹句引号内用问号或感叹号，引号外第一个字母小写。

且“某人说”可以写作“sb.said也可以写作“said sb.”
①"Yes," he said. ①"You may both go," said Andy.
①"Don't move," she said to Mike in a soft voice.
(3)说话内容+说话人+说话内容
“某人说”可以写作“sb.said”也可以写作“said sb.“
“某人说”前面引号内用逗号，引号外第一个字母小写。

“某人说”后面如果用句号，则后面引号内第一个字母大写；
“某人说”后面如果用逗号，则后面引号内第一个字母小写。

①“That's cool,”he said.“Can l have a try?”
①“You'd better let me go, teased her twin brother, William. “There are dangers allover this place.”
①“You can go any place you want,” Amy said, “but l think you'll find what you need.”
（对话标签在后或者在句子中间时，如果主语事情次，则可以倒装。

而代词不可以倒装。

）
三、避免重复使用say
如果续写中语言描写较多,那么一定要避免通篇都是“said”,而要灵活多变地使用表示“说”的动词。

①愤怒时说:shouted,yelled,barked, warned①羡慕地说:admired
①安慰地说:comforted①激动地说:exclaimed
①坚定地说:declared①坚持说:insisted
①命令地说:commanded①警告地说:warned
①高兴地说:smiled，screamed, cheered,
laughed
①悲伤地说: cried,mumbled,sobbed,sighed
①嘲笑说:sneered①责备地说:scolded
①要求说:demanded①威胁说threatened
①开玩笑说: teased,joked
例：“What is the matter now?” asked his wife. “I just can't remember why I come back and where I am supposed to be going on such a hot summer day," replied the professor. However,the real reason was that he forgot where he had left his children. Sensing something wrong, Mrs.Smith didn't believe his words, because whenever he told a lie, he would usually blink his eyes quickly. “Tell me the truth,” ordered his wife. “As you told me, I didn't forget where I put the name of that town, but I forget the station where I left our children!” whispered the professor, his voice trembling. “What a bad memory!” shouted his wife.
现在怎么了?”他的妻子问道。

“我只是记不清我为什么回来，也不知道我在这么炎热的夏天应该去哪里。

”教授回答道。

然而,真正的原因是他忘了把孩子们留在哪里了翻译:Smith太太觉察到有什么不对劲,她不太相信他的话,因为每当他说谎,他通常会快速地眨眼“正如你告诉我的，我没有忘记我把那个城镇的名字放”他的妻子命令道。

“记性真差!在哪里，但我忘了我把孩子们留在哪个车站了!”教授声音颤抖着低声说。

“告诉我真相。

“正如你告诉我的，我没有忘记我把那个城镇的名字放在那里，但我忘了我把孩子们留在哪个车站了！”教授声音颤抖着低声说。

“记忆真差！”
三、如何让对话更生动
第一种：加语气
基本结构为:in a/an+形容词+tone。

也可以用in a tone of +名词的搭配。

in a pleasant tone以一种愉悦的语气
in a firm tone 以一种坚定的语气
in a rude tone 以一种粗鲁的语气
in a sad tone 以一种悲伤的语气
in a tone of surprise用一种惊讶的语气in a tone of curiosity用一种好奇的语气in a tone of impatience用一种不耐烦的语气in a tone of command用一种命令的语气
【“I would love to,” said Emily in a pleasant tone.】“我很乐意这样做，”艾米丽用一种愉快的语气说
第二种：加情感基本结构是:with/in +情感类名词。

with excitement激动地in anger 生气地in astonishment 诧异地with enthusiasm 热情地
【“I...I... don’t think I’m right for the part," I replied with embarrassment.】
“我...我..认为我不适合这个角色，”我尴尬地回答。

第三种：加嗓音基本结构是:in a/an+形容词+voice
in a high /low/sweet/loud/soft /weak voice 用一个高/低/甜/响亮/软的声音
【“I didn’t mean to,” she murmured in a low voice.】“我不是故意的，”她低声说。

第四种：加情感态度的副词
1.基本结构是: +adv.
【“I will never do that again,”I answered firmly.】
【Firmly，I answered, “I will never do that again.”】可将副词提到句首
“我再也不会那样做了，”我坚定地回答。

2.基本结构是:+adv. +doing.（添加非谓语动词表达后续动作）
1.“我去给我们拿点咖啡。

”她温柔地说道，朝厨房走去。

“I’ll get us some coffee,” she said gently, heading for the kitchen.
2.“我再也不相信你了。

”他生气地大喊道，砰的一声关上门。

“I don't believe you anymore." He yelled angrily, slamming the door.
3.“我被狼袭击了，我以为再也见不到你了。

”麦克激动地说，紧紧抱住他们。

“I was attacked by a wolf and I thought I would never see you again.” Mike said excitedly, hugging them tightly.
第五种：添加动作链
基本结构是:sb. did sth, did sth and said “xxx.”(添加动作链)
1.他拦下出租车，提着行李箱跳上车，对司机说:“请去警察局。

He stopped the taxi, jumped in with the suitcase and told the driver, “Go to the police station, please.”
2.她冲上前去，跪在地上，喃喃地说:“对不起，我的宝贝。

”
She dashed forward, knelt down and murmured,“I'm sorry, my baby.”
3.我匆忙穿上衣服，拿起包说:“请等一下我!”
I put on my clothes hurriedly, grabbed my bag and said, "please wait for me!"
4.“没人能理解我!”安迪哽咽着，双手掩面。

“Nobody could understand me!"Andy sobbed, burying his face in his hands.
【例】: “I can't believe it," Emma said with a gasp. (对话标签Emma said+ with介词短语) Emma gasped. "l can't believe it." (动作描写+句号)
“I can't believe it." Emma gasped. (对话句+动作描写，注意对话句式句号)
“That's funny!" Henry chuckled. （感叹句结束+动作描写)
“That's funny," Henry said, chuckling. (对话标签+分词做伴随状况)
2023-2024第二学期高二英语作文训练（四）——读后续写参考答案Six months later, she heard that the same ballet troupe was performing in her town again. Bitter memories of the leader's harsh words came flooding back to her. This time she was determined to find out why the leader had told her she was not good enough when all her teachers thought otherwise. He replied, “I tell this to every student.” She angrily shot back, “You've ruined my life!” Then she got a further shock, “I remember your gift of roses and how the thorns had pricked your fingers but you carried on bravely.” He said if she did not give up so easily, it might be a different story.
Within three years, Jasmine had become a famous ballerina as she wanted. Guided by the troupe leader, she succeeded in attaining the leading position in the Swan Lake. Her elegant appearance and excellent performance on the stage was so amazing that she gained power over all the audiences. Despite being so famous, Jasmine still felt nervous sometimes. But one word would always calm her down: “If you want to pick roses, don’t be afraid of the thorns.”
2023-2024第二学期高二英语作文训练（四）——读后续写参考答案Six months later, she heard that the same ballet troupe was performing in her town again. Bitter memories of the leader's harsh words came flooding back to her. This time she was determined to find out why the leader had told her she was not good enough when all her teachers thought otherwise. He replied, “I tell this to every student.” She angrily shot back, “You've ruined my life!” Then she got a further shock, “I remember your gift of roses and how the thorns had pricked your fingers but you carried on bravely.” He said if she did not give up so easily, it might be a different story.
Within three years, Jasmine had become a famous ballerina as she wanted. Guided by the troupe leader, she succeeded in attaining the leading position in the Swan Lake. Her elegant appearance and excellent performance on the stage was so amazing that she gained power over all the audiences. Despite being so famous, Jasmine still felt nervous sometimes. But one word would always calm her down: “If you want to pick roses, don’t be afraid of the thorns.”。