新标准大学英语四综合教程Unit1-6课文及翻译
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If you ask me1
If you ask me, real life is not all it's cracke d up to be. Twelve yearsat school and threeyearsat univer sity, teache rs bangin g on aboutopport uniti es in the big wide worldbeyond our shelte red life as studen ts, and what do I find?
2 Try as I mightto stay cheerf ul, all I ever get is hassle, someti mes with people (especi allyboys, god, when will they grow up?), but mostly with money. It's just so expens ive out here! Everyo ne wantsa sliceoff you. The Inland Revenu e wantsto deduct income tax, the bank manage r wantsrepaym entson my studen t loan, the landlo rd wantsthe rent, gas, water, electr icity and my mobile billskeep coming in, and all that's before I've had anythi ng to eat. And then some bright sparkcallsme out of the blue, asking if I'm intere stedin buying a pensio n. At this rate, I won't even last till the end of the year, let alonetill I'm 60.
3 I didn't really want to go out to work just yet. I mean, I wasn't a dropou t and I knew I'd have to some day. Accord ing to any number of people "life's not a picnic", "there's no such thingas a free lunch". But giventhat I'd got a good degree, I though t I'd like to go on to get my master's. Actual ly, I had my eye on the course at the London School of Econom ics (LSE) . Top school, very good for my CV. But I talked to my mum aboutit, and she said she couldn't afford to suppor t me any more. I kind of unders tandit, and not just becaus e my degree is in econom ics. She'd worked hard for 15 yearsto give me an educat ion. My dad wasn't around most of the time, and when he was, he didn't have any money. He'd spentit gambli ng on the dogs or down the pub. So it came to the pointwhen
I just agreed with Mum, and bowedmyself toward s the inevit able.
4 If you ask me, and despit e everyt hingyou hear, fortun ately thereare some really nice people out there. Take Mike, for exampl e. When I left univer sity, what I though t was that my mum wouldfeel oblige d to look afterme if I return ed home. So I packed up my belong ingsand went to London to get a job. I wanted someth ing in financ e and invest ments, becaus e you know, maybewith a job like that, I coulduse my degree. But by that time, therewere no jobs left, and I didn't really want to end up in some boring office, doingphotoc opies and making the tea.
5 Go anywhe re you like in London and there's usuall y a good pub. The day I realiz ed no one in the city was goingto offerme a job, I went into The Salisb ury on Leaden hallStreet for a drinkand someth ing to eat. Mike the landlo rd was at the bar, pourin g pintswith one hand, making sandwi cheswith the other, and washin g the glasse s all at the same time—it's true, he really did seem to have threehands. He also seemed to know everyo ne, and greete d the regula rs by name, gettin g theirdrinks readywith the questi on, "The usualtoday, is it?" I though t he looked kind of cool, he was doingwhat he did best, servin g thirst y client s, and no one did it better. So I went up to him and askedhim whethe r therewas a job for me.
6 Well, to cut a long storyshort, I starte d work in the pub one Friday lunchtime. It was quitedemand ing work, but I likedit. People seemed to find me amusin g and it made me feel better too. Therewas one middle-aged regula r in a suit who always had a half of bitter and a ham and pickle sandwi ch, with the crusts cut off. When I saw Tony coming, I triedto have his lunchreadyfor him even before he asked. He was anothe r one of thosereally nice people.
7 If you ask me, spendi ng moneywhen you don't have any is dead easy. I beganto thinkabouthow I'd spendmy firstmonth's wages. The flat whereI was stayin g was expens ive, and I just abouthad enough to coverthe firstmonth's substa ntial bills. But I calcul atedthat there'd be just enough moneyover to treatmyself to someth ing. Why not get a CD or maybea plantto cheerup the flat? I though t.
8 It was my birthd ay on pay day. Apartfrom Mike and Tony, I didn't have any friend s in London. Seeing that I didn't have a boyfri end either, you can unders tandwhy I beganto feel sorryfor myself. So I ordere d myself some flower s, and askedthem to be sent with a little card, saying "With all my love Anon." The highli ght of my birthd ay wouldbe the confus ed look on the floris t's eyes when he delive red them.
9 Laterthat week, Tony came in as usualand sat down at the bar. "What's wrongwith you? Where's that smilegone today?" I talked to him about... well, aboutpretty well everyt hing, money, the master's, my birthd ay, the lot. He sympat hized with me.
10 Tony got up from his stool, and went over to talk to some of the others. Rememb er: The Salisb ury is rightin the heartof the city, so all the custom ers were in bankin g or insura nce or the stockmarket. Next day he turned up with cheque s to the valueof £20,000. "This is a loan for you to set up your busine ss. The only collat eralyou have is my trustin you that one day, you'll pay us back—if you can. And if you can't, too bad, that's the financ e busine ss for you. But I thinkyou will."
11 I didn't say anythi ng for fear that I was goingto cry. What were the odds on anyone beingso nice?
12 And the flower s? I redire ctedthem to my mum, and they arrive d for her on my birthd ay. She deserv ed them, don't you think?
13 If you ask me, lookin g back afterall theseyears, you only need one or two breaks in your life to succee d. The fact that the rest is hard work doesn't matter, it's stillworthit.
14 Aftera year workin g at The Salisb ury, I got a placeat the LSE, did my master's and founda job in an invest mentbank. I invest ed the £20,000, and sold out before the 2008 crash. I paid back Tony and the otherinvest ors, with ten per cent annual intere st, and set up my own firm. It exceed ed all my expect ation s and is stilla thrivi ng busine ss.
15 Tony wroteme a thank-you note. He'd been in a car accide nt, and couldn't walk. The moneyI paid back wouldallowhim to adapthis houseso he couldmove around it in his wheelc hair. This is what he wrote:
16 "Thirty-five yearsin bankin g, and I've nevermade a better invest mentthan the loan to you. You've repaid the moneywith intere st, and my trustin you and your honest y 100-fold. If you ask me, invest ing in people givesthe best return you can ever hope for."
17 If you ask me, he's right. What do you think?
依我看
依我看，现实生活并没有人们想象的那么好。
我们上了12年的中、小学，又上了3年的大学，这期间老师们一直在没完没了地谈论在备受呵护的学生生活之外的那个广阔天地里的各种机会，可我遇到的又是什么呢？
无论我怎么想保持心情愉快，可麻烦事总是接踵而来：有时是和人发生矛盾（尤其是跟男孩子，天哪！他们什么时候才能长大？），但通常是为钱发愁。
这个地方什么东西都很贵！人人都想从我身上赚点钱：税务局要收个人所得税，银行经理要我偿清学生贷款，房东催我交房租、燃气费、水费、电费，手机账单也不断地寄来。
所有这些还没算上吃饭的钱。
更可气的是，不知从哪里冒出一个自作聪明的家伙给我打电话，问我要不要买养老金。
照这样下去，我甚至都支撑不到年底，更别提活到60岁领养老金了。
我那时还不想出去工作。
我的意思是，我并不是个逃避现实社会的人，但我知道自己未来某一天可能不得不逃避现实。
许多人认为“生活不是野餐”，“没有免费的午餐”。
但既然我拿到了优等生文凭，我想我应该继续攻读硕士学位。
实际上，我已经看中了伦敦政治经济学院的课程。
这是一所顶尖的学校，能给我的履历表增添一段光彩的经历。
但当我跟妈
妈谈起这件事时，她说她没法继续供我上学了。
我大概能理解她的心情，但并不仅仅是因为我学的是经济学。
15年来，为了能让我上学，她含辛茹苦。
这些年来，父亲大部分时间都不在家。
就算在家，他也没钱。
他把钱都拿去赌狗、喝酒了。
所以我听了妈妈的话，向命运低下了头。
依我看，不管人们说什么，幸运的是世上还有很多好心人。
迈克就是其中的一个。
大学毕业时，我想如果我回家，妈妈就会觉得她有责任照顾我。
所以，我就收拾行李去伦敦找工作。
我想找金融和投资方面的职位，因为你知道这样我就可以用上我的专业知识。
可是那时候已经没有这样的工作了，但我又不愿意做复印文件、端茶倒水之类的乏味的办公室工作。
在伦敦，无论走到什么地方，你都能找到一个好酒吧。
有一天，我意识到这个城市没有人会雇我，于是我走进位于利德贺街的索尔兹伯里酒吧去喝酒，顺便吃点东西。
店主迈克正在店里，他一只手倒酒，一只手做三明治，同时还洗酒杯。
他真的好像有三只手。
他好像也认识所有的客人，叫得出常客的名字。
他跟他们打招呼，帮他们调好酒，并问一句：“今天还喝这个，是吧？”我觉得他看起来蛮酷的，他在做着他最擅长的事情：为那些口渴的顾客服务，没人能比得上他。
所以我就走上前去问他要不要雇人。
好吧，长话短说，某个周五的午餐时间我开始在那个酒吧打工。
这份工作要求很高，但我喜欢。
顾客好像觉得我很有趣，这也让我感觉好一些。
有位穿西服的中年常客总要半杯苦啤酒和一份火腿泡菜三明治，面包皮要削掉。
他叫托尼。
我一看见他进来，尽量不等他开口就准备好他的午餐。
他也是一个好心人。
依我看，一个人没钱的时候花钱最容易。
我开始琢磨怎么花第一个月的薪水了。
我住的公寓房租很贵，我挣的钱刚够支付第一个月的大笔账单，但是我估计还能剩点钱好好犒劳一下自己。
我想，何不买张CD或买盆花草装点一下房间？
发工资的那天正好是我的生日，除了迈克和托尼，我在伦敦就没有别的朋友了。
如果你知道我那时还没有男朋友，你就会理解我为什么觉得对不起自己了。
我给自己定了些鲜花，让卖花的人附上一张卡片，上面写道：“给你我所有的爱。
无名氏”。
我生日那天最精彩的瞬间将会是送花人送我花时大惑不解的眼神。
那周晚些时候，托尼像往常一样来了，在酒吧里坐下。
“你怎么了？今天怎么不见你笑啦？”我跟他聊天……嗯，差不多什么都跟他说了：钱、硕士学位、生日、命运。
他很同情我。
托尼离开搁脚凳、走过去和另外几个人说话。
别忘了：索尔兹伯里酒吧位于市中心，所以这里所有的顾客都从事银行、保险或证券工作。
第二天，他拿着价值两万英镑的几张支票来到酒吧，对我说：“这是给你的创业贷款，你唯一的贷款担保就是我对你的信任，相信有一天你赚了钱会把钱还给我们。
如果你还不了钱，那就太糟了，不过对你来说，也算是做过金融生意了。
但是，我相信你还得了。
”
我没说话，我怕我自己要哭了。
世上怎么会有这么好的人？
那些花怎么处理？我叫花店改送到妈妈那里去了，我生日那天鲜花正好送到。
她应该得到这些鲜花，不是吗？
依我看，回顾这些年的经历，我发现人一辈子只需要一两次的机缘就能成功。
就算吃苦受累也不要紧，那还是值得的。
在索尔兹伯里酒吧干了一年之后，我去了伦敦政治经济学院深造。
拿到硕士学位之后，我在一家投资银行找到了一份工作。
我把那两万英镑投进了证券市场，在2008年金融崩盘之前卖掉了所有的股票。
我把托尼和其他投资者的钱还了，付给他们10%的年息，并成立了自己的公司。
公司的生意好得出乎意料，至今还红红火火。
托尼给我写了一封感谢信。
他出了车祸，现在不能走路了。
我还给他的钱正好可以用来改造房子。
房子改造后他就可以坐着轮椅在家里自由活动了。
下面是他信里写的话：“我从事银行业35年来最好的投资就是给你的这笔贷款，你连本带利地偿还了贷款，我对你的信任和你的诚实都获得了百倍的回报。
依我看，在人身上投资能带来你所期望的最好的回报。
”
依我看，他说得对。
你说呢？
They were aliveand they spoketo me1
I sit in a little room, one wall of whichis now comple telylinedwith books. It is the firsttime I have had the leisur e of workin g with anythi ng like a collec tionof books. Thereare probab ly no more than 500 in all, but for the most part they repres ent my own choice. It is the firsttime, sinceI beganmy writin g career, that I am surrou ndedwith a goodly number of the booksI have always longed to posses s. The fact, howeve r, that in the past I did most of my work withou t the aid of a librar y I look upon as an advant age rather than a disadv antag e.
One of the firstthings I associ ate with the readin g of booksis the strugg le I wagedto obtain them. Not to own them, mind you, but to lay handson them. From the moment the passio n took hold of me I encoun tered nothin g but obstac les. The booksI wanted, at the public librar y, were always out. And of course I neverhad the moneyto buy them. To get permis sionfrom the librar y in my neighb orhoo d—I was 18 or 19 yearsof age—to borrow such a "demora lizin g" work as The Confes sionof a Fool, by Strind berg, was just imposs ible. In thosedays the bookswhichyoungpeople were prohib itedfrom readin g were decora ted with stars—one, two or three—accord ing to the degree of immora lityattrib utedto them. I suspec t this proced ure stillobtain s. I hope so, for I know of nothin g better calcul atedto whet one's appeti te than this stupid sort of classi ficat ion and prohib ition.
3 What makesa book live? How oftenthis questi on arises! The answer, in my opinio n, is simple.
A book livesthroug h the passio naterecomm endat ion of one reader to anothe r. Nothin g can thrott le this basicimpuls e in the humanbeing. Despit e the viewsof cynics and misant hrope s, it is my belief that men will always strive to sharetheirdeepes t experi ences.
4 Booksare one of the few things men cheris h deeply. And the better the man the more easily will he part with his most cheris hed posses sions. A book lyingidle on a shelfis wasted ammuni tion. Like money, booksmust be kept in consta nt circul ation. Lend and borrow to the maximu m—of both booksand money! But especi allybooks, for booksrepres ent infini telymore than money. A book is not only a friend, it makesfriend s for you. When you have posses sed a book with mind and spirit, you are enrich ed. But when you pass it on you are enrich ed threef old.
5 Here an irrepr essib le impuls e seizes me to offera pieceof gratui tousadvice. It is this: Read as little as possib le, not as much as possib le! Oh, do not doubtthat I have envied thosewho have drowne d in books. I, too, wouldsecret ly like to wade throug h all thosebooksI have so long toyedwith in my mind. But I know it is not import ant. I know now that I did not need to read even a tenthof what I have read. The most diffic ult thingin life is to learnto do only what is strict ly advant ageou s to one's welfar e, strict ly vital.
6 Thereis an excell ent way to test this precio us bit of advice I have not givenrashly. When you stumbl e upon a book you wouldlike to read, or thinkyou oughtto read, leaveit alonefor a few days. But thinkaboutit as intens ely as you can. Let the titleand the author's name revolv e in your mind. Thinkwhat you yourse lf mighthave writte n had the opport unity been yours. Ask yourse lf earnes tly
if it be absolu telynecess ary to add this work to your storeof knowle dge or your fund of enjoym ent. Try to imagin e what it wouldmean to forego this extrapleasu re or enligh tenme nt. Then, if you find you must read the book, observ e with what extrao rdina ry acumen you tackle it. Observ e, too, that howeve r stimul ating it may be, very little of the book is really new to you. If you are honest with yourse lf you will discov er that your statur e has increa sed from the mere effort of resist ing your impuls es.
7 Indubi tably the vast majori ty of booksoverla p one anothe r. Few indeed are thosewhichgive the impres sionof origin ality, either in styleor in conten t. Rare are the unique books—less than 50, perhap s, out of the wholestoreh ouseof litera ture. In one of his recent autobi ograp hical novels, Blaise Cendra rs points out that Rémy de Gourmo nt, becaus e of his knowle dge and awaren ess of this repeti tivequalit y in books, was able to select and read all that is worthw hilein the entire realmof litera ture. Cendra rs himsel f—who wouldsuspec t it?—is a prodig iousreader. He readsmost author s in theirorigin al tongue. Not only that , but when he likesan author he readseverylast book the man has writte n, as well as his letter s and all the booksthat have been writte n abouthim. In our day his case is almost unpara llele d, I imagin e. For, not only has he read widely and deeply, but he has himsel f writte n a greatmany books. All on the side, as it were. For, if he is anythi ng, Cendra rs, he is a man of action, an advent urerand explor er, a man who has knownhow to "waste" his time royall y. He is, in a sense, the Julius Caesar of litera ture.
它们是活生生的，而且它们在跟我说话
我坐在一间小屋子里，屋子的一面墙边排满了书。
这是我头一次有闲功夫和一堆书这样的东西打交道。
所有的书加起来最多不超过500本，但大多数是我自己挑的。
自打我开始写作生涯以来，我第一次得到我一直渴望拥有的这么多书。
事实上，我过去的大多数工作都不依靠图书馆，我把这看成是优势，而不是劣势。
我想到的与读书相关的头一件事就是夺书大战。
请注意，不是拥有它们，而是要把它们搞到手。
从我对书着迷开始，我就面对着重重困难。
公共图书馆里我要借的书总是被借出去了，当然，我又没钱买书。
我那时只有十八九岁，要想得到社区图书馆的批准借阅类似斯特林堡写的《痴人的忏悔》这样“不道德”的书是不可能的。
在那个年代，年轻人禁读的书都根据其违背道德的程度被标记了星星——一颗星、两颗星、三颗星。
我猜想，这种做法至今依然存在。
我也希望如此，因为我知道，没有任何别的方法比这种愚蠢的分类和禁止更能吊起读者的胃口。
我经常思考一个问题，那就是是什么让一本书有了生命力？我觉得答案很简单：一本书之所以有生命力，是因为读者满怀激情地推荐它。
这是人的基本冲动，什么都阻挡不了。
不管愤世嫉俗者和遁世者持何种观点，我相信人们总是会尽力分享自己感触最深的经验。
书是人类最为珍爱的几样东西之一。
人越好，就越愿意与他人分享自己的珍藏。
搁置在书架上、无人翻阅的书就像是废弃的弹药。
书和钱一样要流通起来，要最大限度地流通起来！尤其是书，因为书所代表的东西比钱要多得多。
书不仅是朋友，它还可以帮你结交朋友。
当你在精神上、心灵上拥有一本书的时候，你的人生就变得丰富多彩。
而当你把书转给别人的时候，你的人生就更加丰富。
说到这里，有一种抑制不住的冲动让我向大家提出一条无端的忠告。
那就是：读书尽量少而精，而不是越多越好！唉，不要怀疑我嫉妒那些在书堆里埋头读书的人。
我私下里也确实想尽力读完所有一直想读的书。
但是，我知道这并不重要，我现在知道我读过的书中只有不到十分之一是我需要读的。
人生中最难办到的事情莫过于学会只做对自己有益的事情，这是至关重要的。
我是经过慎重考虑才提出这条宝贵的忠告的，有一个高招可以检验它是否有效。
当
你碰到一本你想读或觉得该读的书的时候，先把书搁下，放几天再说。
但你要多琢磨这本书，仔细琢磨书名和作者的名字。
想想如果让你来写这本书，你会写些什么。
认真地问问自己是否有必要把这本书纳入自己的知识库或娱乐储备。
尽力想象一下，放弃这份额外的乐趣或启迪对你将意味着什么？之后，如果你觉得你必须读这本书，那么观察一下你在“啃”这本书的时候是否表现出非凡的洞察力。
同时你也观察一下：即使这本书很诱人，它也许并没有给你带来什么新的东西。
只要坦诚对己，你就会发现：只要抑制住自己的冲动，你的境界就提高了。
不容置疑的是，大多数书都互相重复，在文体或内容上让人感到具有独创性的书实在是少之又少。
在整个文学库藏中，只有极少数作品——或许不到50本——是独具一格的。
在最近出版的一部自传体小说中，布莱斯•桑德拉尔指出，古尔蒙之所以能够选择并通读文学领域中一切值得读的书籍，就是因为他知识渊博，并且了解书的这种重复性。
桑德拉尔本人就是一个博览群书的人，没有人会怀疑这一点。
他阅读了大部分作家的原作。
不仅如此，一旦他喜欢上一个作家，他就会阅读这个作家写的每一本书，包括他的书信以及所有有关他的书籍。
我猜想，在当今世界上，几乎没有人能像他一样，不仅读得广、读得精，而且还著述颇丰。
可以说这一切都是在业余时间完成的。
因为桑德拉尔是一个十足的行动家，一个四处跋涉的冒险家和探险家，一个懂得如何“肆意浪费”时间的人。
从某种意义上说，他是文学界的凯撒大帝。
The Key to Wedded Bliss? MoneyMatter s1
If you ask marrie d people why theirmarria ge works, they are probab ly not goingto say it's becaus e they foundtheirfinanc ial soulma te.
2 But if they are lucky, they have. Marryi ng a person who shares your attitu des aboutmoneymightjust be the smarte st financ ial decisi on you will ever make. In fact, when it comesto financ es, your marria ge is likely to be your most valuab le asset—or your larges t liabil ity.
3 Marryi ng for love is a relati velyrecent phenom enon. For centur ies, marria ges were arrang ed affair s, aligni ng famili es for econom ic or politi cal purpos es or simply poolin g the resour ces of thosescrapi ng by.
4 Today, whilemost of us marryfor romant ic reason s, marria ge at its core is stilla financ ial union.So much of what we want—or don't want—out of life boilsdown to dollar s and cents, whethe r it's how hard we choose to work, how much we consum e or how much we save. For some people, it's workin g 80-hour weeksto financ e a thirdhome and countr y club member ship;for others, it meanscuttin g back on office hoursto spendmore time with the family.
5 "A lot of the debate s people have aboutmoneyare code for how we want to live our lives," said Betsey Steven son, assist ant profes sor of busine ss and public policy at the Univer sityof Pennsy lvani a's Wharto n School, who resear chesthe econom ics of marria ge and divorc e. "A lot of the choice s we make in how we want to live our livesinvolv e how we spendour money."
6 Making thosechoice s as a team is one of the most import ant ways to preser ve your marita l assets, and your union,expert s say. But it's that much easier when you alread y sharesimila r outloo ks on moneymatter s—or when you can, at the very least, find some middle ground.
7 The econom ies achiev ed by pairin g up are fairly obviou s. Howeve r, the costsof divorc e can be financ ially devast ating, especi allywhen childr en are involv ed. And, not surpri singl y, moneymanage s to forcea wide wedgebetwee n many couple s.
8 "Most people thinkpeople breakup over sex issues and childr en issues—and thoseare issues—but moneyis a huge factor in breaki ng up marria ges," said SusanReachWinter s, a divorc e
lawyer in ShortHills, N. J.
9 Not everyo ne is marrie d to a financ ial twin, and that's not necess arily a proble m. Thereare severa l ways that you and your signif icant othercan become more compat ible, and ultima telymore prospe rous, when it comesto money.
10 Theseguidel inesare compil ed from the succes sfull y marrie d and from expert s on psycho logy, divorc e and financ e:
11 TALK AND SHAREGOALSBefore walkin g down the aisle, couple s should have a talk abouttheirfinanc ial health and goals. They should ask each othertoughquesti ons: Do we want childr en? When? Who will care for them? Will they go to public or privat e school? What kind of life do we want? When will we retire?
12 "In my idealplan for couple s, they wouldhave a meetin g everyweek on theirfinanc es," said KarenAltfes t, a financ ial planne r who runs the New York firm L. J. Altfes t & Compan y, with her husban d, Lewis. "That way, they are in sync with each other's goals."
13 Set thosegoalstogeth er. JerryBallar d, 58, a former insura nce execut ive in Housto n, said that he and his wife of 36 years, Susan, also 58, manage d to avoidmoneyclashe s becaus e they sharea saving s philos ophy. "The cardin al rule was that we don't interr upt our saving s," he said, adding that they savedbetwee n 10 and 20 per cent of theirsalari es each year. As long as they did that, they were less likely to disagr ee aboutspendi ng.
14 Eric Gundla ch, 53, of Owings Mills, Md., who has been marrie d for 29 years, said he and his wife, Ann-Michel e, "made our expect ation s explic it." Theseinclud ed sendin g theirson to privat e school and having big experi ences, like travel ing, in lieu of purcha singthings.
15 RUN A HOME LIKE A BUSINE SS Make a budget and keep trackof earnin gs, expens es and debts. And struct ure your busine ss as a partne rship; when it comesto making big financ ial decisi ons and settin g goals, do it togeth er. "When they are making the decisi ons togeth er, they really have owners hip of thosedecisi ons and any result s of thosedecisi ons," said Mary Ann Sisco, nation al wealth adviso r at JP Morgan's privat e wealth manage mentdivisi on. "Even if you have negati ve result s, you tend to weathe r the stormbetter." Sharerespon sibil ities too. Though one partne r tendsto contro l the financ es, adviso rs recomm end rotati ng tasks. One person should handle invest ments for a certai n period, whilethe otherpays the bills; rotate and repeat.
16 BE SUPPOR TIVEOF CAREER S Having a suppor tivepartne r helpsyou profes siona lly, whichshould trickl e down to your mutual bottom line. "Marryi ng the rightperson helpsyou succee d in your career throug h encour ageme nt and suppor t, the only kind of suppor t that comesthroug h a suppor tive, intima te relati onshi p," said Mr. Gundla ch, whosewife backed his decisi on to starta manage mentconsul tingpracti ce after22 yearsas a humanresour ces execut ive.
17 ENJOY, BUT WITHIN REASON Create a cash cushio n, and live a lifest yle you can sustai n. Many people who were workin g at hedgefundsthat went bust or financ ial firmslike Bear Stearn s are learni ng theselesson s now. Ms. Sisco, of JP Morgan, said that becaus e her younge r client s haven't experi enced a downtu rn, they assume d the moneywouldkeep pourin g in.
18 She said she is workin g with one couple in theirearly30s who have two youngchildr en. Rightbefore the husban d lost his job on Wall Street, the couple had ordere d $35,000 drapes. They had to move to a smalle r apartm ent in Manhat tan and had to sell theirvacati on home.
19 USE A MEDIAT OR Perhap s both of you have strong yet diverg ent opinio ns abouthow to invest. Or maybeyou are a saverwhileyour spouse prefer s to hand over a big pieceof earnin gs to Bavari an MotorWorks. An indepe ndent thirdparty, whethe r a financ ial planne r or a therap ist, can
help you find a middle ground.
20 Marc B. Schind ler, a financ ial planne r at PivotPointAdviso rs in Bellai re, Tex., recent ly did this for a client who compla inedthat his wife spenta thousa nd dollar s a monthon her wardro be. Mr. Schind ler then contac ted the wife, who said her husban d spentjust as much on dinner with his buddie s. So the husban d askedMr. Schind ler to show how much they wouldsave if they invest ed the $12,000 she spenteach year. Mr. Schind ler—carefu l to titlethe report"Clothi ng, Dinner or Invest ed?"—ran an analys is and foundthat the couple wouldhave $1.6 millio n after28 years, assumi ng a 9 per cent rate of return. "They are goingto try and compro mise," he said.
21 MAINTA IN SOME INDEPE NDENC E Poolin g resour ces is import ant, but so is mainta ining a degree of financ ial indepe ndenc e. Carveout some moneyfor both partne rs to spendon things that make them happy. And when paring back, it's essent ial that each person make sacrif ices.
22 INVEST IN YOUR MARRIA GE Spendit—time and money—togeth er. Go on dates. "What that does is enlive n the marita l founda tion," said Gary S. Shunk, a Chicag o therap ist who specia lizes in wealth issues. "It's a kind of invest mentinto the heartand soul of the relati onshi p."
23 Thinkof it as dollar-cost averag ing your marria ge, whereyou make smallinvest ments over time. If you wait untilretire ment, it couldbe too late.
婚姻幸福的奥秘是什么？金钱才是关键
假如你询问已婚人士婚姻成功的奥秘在哪里，他们可能不会说那是因为找到了持相同金钱观的知己。
但如果他们幸运的话，他们一定是找到了这样的知己。
和金钱观相同的人结婚很可能就是一辈子最聪明的财务决策。
事实上，就财务而言，婚姻可能是你最有价值的资产——或者最大的一笔债务。
近年来，人们为爱而结婚。
但在此前的几个世纪，婚姻都是包办的，家庭联姻或出于经济或政治目的，或仅仅是为了使家境不好的家庭集中两家的财力，以维持生计。
如今，尽管我们大多数人是因相爱而结婚，婚姻从根本上讲仍然是金钱上的结合。
不管是工作的努力程度，还是决定消费多少或储蓄多少，我们生活中想要得到的——或不想得到的——许多东西归根结底都跟钱有关。
对有些人来说，他们想要的就是一周工作80 小时来支付第三套房的房款和乡村俱乐部的会员费；而对另一些人来说，他们想缩短上班时间，花更多的时间陪伴家人。
“关于钱的许多争论是提示我们想如何生活的密码，而生活方式的许多选择则与如何花钱密切相关。
”宾夕法尼亚大学沃顿商学院的商业及公共政策助理教授贝齐•史蒂文森如是说，他研究婚姻和离婚经济学。
专家们说，夫妻共同做出这些选择是维护婚姻资产及婚姻关系的最重要的方法之一。
当然，如果夫妻双方一开始就在钱的问题上看法相似，或者至少能够在钱的问题上相互妥协，那么事情就好办多了。
联姻的经济效益很可观，但离婚的代价却是毁灭性的，尤其是有了孩子之后。
毫不奇怪，金钱也造成了许多夫妻间的不和。
新泽西州秀特山市的离婚律师苏珊•里奇•温特斯说：“大多数人认为婚姻破裂是因为性或孩子的问题。
这些的确是问题，但金钱也是导致婚姻破裂的一个重要因素。
”并非每个人都能找到金钱观一致的伴侣，当然找不到也不一定就成为问题。
在金钱的问题上，有几种方法能让你和你的另一半更加融洽，更加富有。
下面这些指导原则是由婚姻成功人士以及心理学、离婚和理财专家共同制定的：
互相交流，确定共同目标步入婚姻殿堂之前，男女双方要聊聊各自的财务状况及目标。
他们要互相问对方一些棘手的问题：我们要不要孩子？什么时候要孩子？谁来照看。