200词英语幽默小故事.doc

合集下载

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。

学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。

“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。

”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。

”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事故事1:The Mischievous ParrotOne day, a man named John went to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shopkeeper showed him a beautiful parrot, which could speak many languages. Impressed, John decided to take it home.However, as soon as John reached home, he realized that the parrot was quite mischievous. It would imitate John's voice and play pranks on him. The parrot would hide his keys, steal his wallet, and even mimic his wife's voice to confuse him.Despite the trouble, John found the parrot's antics amusing and couldn't help but laugh. He decided to name the parrot Charlie, as it perfectly suited its cheeky personality.One day, John's friend came to visit. Charlie, being the clever parrot he was, decided to have some fun. As John and his friend sat down to chat, Charlie imitated their voices and pretended to have a conversation, switching back and forth between their voices flawlessly. John's friend was astonishedand couldn't figure out how both of them were speaking at the same time.Soon, Charlie realized that his prank had gone too far. He feared that John's friend would get upset or angry, so he quickly revealed his trick by saying, \。

简单幽默英语小故事及翻译.doc

简单幽默英语小故事及翻译.doc

1I Don’t Like HerBob goes to a new school.One day he comes back, “Bob, do you like your new teacher?” his mothe “I don’t like her, Mother. Because first she says that three and three is six, andthen she says that two and four is six, too.”我不喜欢她鲍勃的去了所新学校。

一天,他回到家,他妈妈问他:“你喜欢你的新老师吗?”“不,我不喜欢她,妈妈。

因为她先说3加3等于6,然后她又说2加4等于6.”2Ten CandiesMother asks her son, “Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candles do you have?”“Ten.” Jim says.“Ten?” Mother asks.Yes, Mum. Four candies are in my stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Four and six is ten, isn’t it right?”十块糖妈妈问儿子:“吉姆,如果你有10块糖,吃了4块,那你还有几块糖?”“10块。

”吉姆说。

“10块?”妈妈问。

“是的,妈妈。

因为4块在我的肚子里面,6块在肚子外面,4加6等于10,不对吗?”3Where is the egg?Teacher: Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?Student: Yes. I ate a piece of cake yesterday.Teacher: Then where is the “egg"?Student: In the cake, sir.鸡蛋在哪里?老师:你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗?学生:可以。

幽默简短的英语小故事

幽默简短的英语小故事

幽默简短的英语小故事幽默简短的英语小故事(精选16篇)在平时阅读幽默又简短的一些英语小故事,是可以帮助提高我们的英语水平的。

一起来看看店铺为大家整理幽默简短的英语小故事,欢迎大家阅读!幽默简短的英语小故事篇1The Old Cat:An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."幽默简短的英语小故事篇2Everybody dreams of doing something important. As a boy Raymond dreamed of being a scientist,infact, he is a postman now.Raymon d is an active young man. He livesby the saying“If you can't live the life you love, love the life you live”He greets everyone with a big smileand afriendly“Hi, howare you?”And he really wants to know! It's hardto feel unhappy when we hear him whistling happily up and down the street.幽默简短的英语小故事篇3Not long after my sister's wedding,one of my father's colleagues and his wife dropped in to see Mom and Dad.Theguests had not been invited to the wedding, so when the woman said,”I'm sorry I didn't get over to t he church the other day,”Mom assumed she meant the church's Good Cheer Club Tea and Bazaar."I'rn glad you didn't.”Mom replied.”You never saw such a mob scene!""I thought I'd like to see how everyone was dressed,"the guest said."What did you wear?""Just m y old navy print and my oxfords,“said Mom,"and a good thing,too,as we cleared almost a thousand dollars. ""Did you take a collection?"the woman gasped.“"Oh, no,“said Mom,"you know how it is,a lot of people come just to look and you don't make a thing out of them,so we decided to charge admission at the door.”At this point Dad realized signals were crossed,and he suggested to Mom that she explain that my sister's wedding had been neither a mob scene nor a profit-making venture.幽默简短的英语小故事篇4A big一city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher claimed that the bull must have been hit by the train, and wanted o be paid the fair value of the bull.The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. As soon as the rancher showed up, the attorney for the railroad pulled him aside and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking. After the rancher had signed the release and took the check,the young lawyer couldn’t resist gloating a little over his success,telling the rancher, "You know, I hate to tell you this, oldman,but I put one over on you in there. I couldn’t have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn’t have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you!”The old rancher replied,"Well,I’11 tell you,young Teller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that darned bull came home this morning.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇5One day, Robin Hood went hunting alone in the forest. He had told his men that if he should fall into any danger and could not escape he would blow his horn so that they might know and come to help him. When he was crossing a river by a long bridge he met a huge man at the middle.And neither of the two would give way to the other. Robin Hood got angry and put an arrow to his bow and made ready to shoot. The stranger said it was unfair for Robin Hood to shoot a man who had only a staff in his hand. Hearing this Robin Hood lay down his bow and pulled up a small tree and returned to the stranger.幽默简短的英语小故事篇6A farmer is wondering how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks his sheepdog to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts them, and then runs back to his master."So," says the farmer. "How many sheep were there?""40," replies the dog."How can there be 40?" exclaims the farmer. "I only bought 38!""I know," says the dog. "But I rounded them up."幽默简短的英语小故事篇7Many years afterreceivingmygraduatedegree, I returned tothe State University of New York at Binghamton as afacultymember. One day in a crowdedelevator, someone remarked on itsinefficiency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.When the door finally opened, I felt acompassionatepaton my back, and turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. "You'll get that degree, dear," shewhispered. "Perseverance is a virtue." 幽默简短的英语小故事篇8A newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home. "What's up? Why do you look so troubled?" the husband asked. The woman replied, "I'm so sorry.I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said, "That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair," the wife responded.幽默简短的英语小故事篇9A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc.She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you."幽默简短的英语小故事篇10The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film. When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them, “you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refund you the tic kets.”About half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?” “I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered. “It’s not worth seeing.” “I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said. “Wake the child up and let him cry.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇11A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I should have brought my wife!"幽默简短的英语小故事篇12Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before , so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?""Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."幽默简短的英语小故事篇13A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog cocked its leg, then urinated on its owner. Calmly, the blind man reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog.A passerby who'd seen everything remarked: "That’s extremely tolerant of you, especially after what he just did.”"Not really,”came the reply. "I’m just finding out where his mouth is, so I can kick him in the nuts.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇14Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he re- quested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came run- ping up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar!I just saw someone driving off wit h your new Mercedes!”"Dear God! Did you try to stop him?""No,”she said,"I did better than that! I got the license plate number”幽默简短的英语小故事篇15A famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give aseries of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For thetask, he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sit in on the highlytechnical lectures. After several lectures, the driver commented to theeconomist, "You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I coulddeliver it myself." Theeconomist found this idea intriguing and decided toswitch places with him at his next lecture.The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some onein the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had noidea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, andthen replied, "That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it."幽默简短的英语小故事篇16The miserly millionaire ca lled a family conference, “ I’m placing a box of money in the attic,” he said.” When I die, I intend to grab it on my way up to heaven. See to it that no one touches it until it’s my time too go.”The family respected his wishes. After his death, the milli onaire’s wife looked in the attic. The box was still there. “ THE FOOL!” she said. ”I told him he should have put it in the basement.”。

英语小故事幽默带翻译

英语小故事幽默带翻译
In conclusion, humor is indeed a universal language, but it's important to understand the unique nuances of humor in different cultures. Just because something is funny in one language doesn't necessarily mean it will translate to another. By studying and adapting to the humor of different cultures, r and use it to connect with people from all walks of life.
总之,幽默确实是一种通用语言,但了解不同文化中幽默的独特细微差别是很重要的。仅仅因为某样东西在一个语言中很有趣,并不一定意味着它会被翻译成另一种语言。通过学习和适应不同文化的幽默,我们可以欣赏幽默的多样性,并用它来与各行各业的人们建立联系。
那个人很努力,写新笑话,不断完善自己的表演时机和表演技巧。他开始受邀参加越来越大的演出,很快就有了一批忠实的粉丝。他的英语笑话如此受欢迎,以至于来自世界各地的人都来观看他的表演。他甚至有机会去不同的国家进行喜剧巡回演出。无论他走到哪里,人们都喜欢他的幽默感,他被誉为喜剧天才。
One day, while on tour in China, the man decided to try telling his jokes in Mandarin. He had been studying the language for a while and felt confident enough to give it a shot. However, to his dismay, the Chinese audience didn't laugh at any of his jokes. It seemed his humor just didn't translate well into Mandarin. The man was baffled and disappointed. He thought he had mastered the art of comedy, but now he realized that humor was indeed different across cultures.

英语幽默小故事14篇

英语幽默小故事14篇
英语幽默小故事 篇3
Gardening Gloves For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an
allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you‘ll notice that my hands are bare." Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair of gardening gloves. 园艺手套 几个月以来,我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指,因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天,我正在 干园艺活时,丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说:“嗯,你肯定看到了,我的两手都是光光的。” 那天晚上,我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的.礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看:里面包着一双园艺手套。
英语幽默小故事 篇8
Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for seve Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wound Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."

超级搞笑英语笑话小短文

超级搞笑英语笑话小短文

超级搞笑英语笑话小短文【篇一】超级搞笑英语笑话小短文给予与提取M.friend’.preparation.fo..visi.fro.he.childre.incl ude..tri.t.th.bank.Waitin.i.lin.a.th.teller’.windo mente.t.th.middle-age.ma.behind.her,”M.childre.ar.i.thei.20’s,an.I’.stil.givin.the.money.Whe.doe.i.end?”我的朋友为其子女的光临做着一些准备工作。

这些工作当然包括要到银行去一超。

当她在出纳员的窗外排队等候时,她对她身后的一位中年男子说:“我的孩子们都20多岁了,可我仍然得给他们钱。

这种事什么时候才算完呢?””I’.no.sure,”th.ma.replie.whil.glancin.uncomfortabl.a..pape.i.hi .hand,”bu.I`.no.th.on.t.ask.I’.her.t.deposi..chec.m.mothe .gav.me.”“我可不知道。

”那位男子边回答边不安地看着手里拿着的那张纸。

“我可不是你该问的人,我到这儿是来支取我妈妈给我的支票的。

”【篇二】超级搞笑英语笑话小短文妻子的欲望.woma.an.he.husban.wer.ou.shoppin.whe.sh.realiz e.tha.sh.neede.t.purchas.som.hai.colo.fo.he.grayin. hair.一位女士在与他的丈夫购物时,她意识到她该为她的灰白头发买些染发水了。

”Whe.ar.yo.goin.t.sto.buyin.tha.expensiv.stuf.,”complaine.th.husband.”an.le.you.hai.g.gra.lik.Barbar.Bush?”她丈夫抱怨说:“你什么时候才能停止买那些昂贵的东西,而让你的头发长成像芭芭拉.布什(总统夫人)的头发那样灰白呢?””Th.da.tha.you’r.inaugurated,”th.wif.replied.“那就要等到你就职的那天了。

幽默英语小故事

幽默英语小故事

幽默英语小故事Once upon a time, there was a man who loved to tell jokes. He was known far and wide for his ability to make people laugh, and he took great pride in his talent. One day, he decided to try his hand at telling jokes in English, even though it was not his native language. He thought it would be a fun challenge, and he was eager to see if he could make people from different cultures laugh.The man started by learning some basic English jokes and practicing them in front of the mirror. He paid close attention to his pronunciation and intonation, making sure that he sounded as natural as possible. After weeks of preparation, he felt confident enough to try out his jokes on a group of English-speaking friends.The man's friends were initially skeptical when he told them that he had jokes to share in English. They knew that English was not his first language, and they were unsure if his jokes would translate well. However, as soon as the man began telling his jokes, their skepticism turned to delight. His delivery was so enthusiastic and his timing so perfect that they found themselves laughing harder than they had in a long time.Encouraged by his friends' positive reactions, the man decided to take his jokes to a wider audience. He started performing at open mic nights and comedy clubs, and before long, he had developed a following of fans who eagerly awaited his next performance. His jokes were a hit not only with English speakers, but also with people from all over the world who appreciated his universal sense of humor.One day, the man was invited to perform at a comedy festival in a foreign country. He was thrilled at the opportunity to share his jokes with an entirely new audience, but he was also nervous about how they would be received. As he took the stage, he could feel the eyes of the crowd on him, and he wondered if his jokes would translate well across cultural boundaries.To his relief and joy, the audience responded to his jokes with uproarious laughter. They appreciated the clever wordplay and the universal themes of his humor, and theymade him feel right at home in their country. The man realized that humor truly knows no borders, and that laughter is a language that everyone can understand.From that day on, the man continued to tell his jokes in English, and he became known as a master of cross-cultural comedy. He proved that no matter where you come from, a good joke will always bring people together and bring joy to their hearts.In the end, the man learned that language is no barrier to humor, and that a good joke will always transcend cultural differences. He continued to spread laughter wherever he went, and he became a beloved figure in the world of comedy. And as he looked back on his journey, he knew that he had found his true calling in making people laugh, no matter what language they spoke.。

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。

幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是店铺整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。

幽默英语小故事1.Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.慎重许愿一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。

他们恰好在同一天出生。

庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。

她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。

妻子想周游世界。

仙女招了招手。

“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。

接下来该丈夫许愿了。

英语幽默小短文(5篇材料)

英语幽默小短文(5篇材料)

英语幽默小短文(5篇材料)第一篇:英语幽默小短文英语幽默小短文Two birdsTeacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which? Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.Teacher: Please tell us.Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.两只鸟老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。

谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。

老师:请说说看。

学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

The Fish Net“Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?”“A lot of little holes tied together with strings.” replied the little girl.鱼网“你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?” 老师发问道。

“把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

” 小女孩回答道。

The New TeacherGeorge comes from school on the first of September.“George, how did you like your new teacher?” asked his mother.“I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too.....”新老师9月1日,乔治放学回到家里。

简单搞笑的英语小故事

简单搞笑的英语小故事

简单搞笑的英语小故事(经典版)编制人:__________________审核人:__________________审批人:__________________编制单位:__________________编制时间:____年____月____日序言下载提示:该文档是本店铺精心编制而成的,希望大家下载后,能够帮助大家解决实际问题。

文档下载后可定制修改,请根据实际需要进行调整和使用,谢谢!并且,本店铺为大家提供各种类型的经典范文,如职场文书、合同协议、总结报告、演讲致辞、规章制度、自我鉴定、应急预案、教学资料、作文大全、其他范文等等,想了解不同范文格式和写法,敬请关注!Download tips: This document is carefully compiled by this editor. I hope that after you download it, it can help you solve practical problems. The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!Moreover, our store provides various types of classic sample essays for everyone, such as workplace documents, contract agreements, summary reports, speeches, rules and regulations, self-assessment, emergency plans, teaching materials, essay summaries, other sample essays, etc. If you want to learn about different sample essay formats and writing methods, please stay tuned!简单搞笑的英语小故事简单搞笑的英语小故事(通用9篇)有很多孩子都喜欢听英语故事,特别是一些简单又很搞笑的小故事是很受欢迎的。

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇【引言】学习英语的过程中,阅读幽默小故事不仅能够提高我们的语言能力,还能让我们在轻松愉快的氛围中领略到英语文化的魅力。

下面,就让我们一起来欣赏10篇英语幽默小故事,并在快乐中学习吧!【故事1】Once upon a time, there was a man named Jack who had a peculiar habit of always forgetting his keys.One day, he locked himself out of his house again.Instead of calling a locksmith, he decided to break into his own house through the window.As he was climbing in, he suddenly realized that he had left his keys inside the house!幽默点:Jack忘记带钥匙的习惯以及他试图通过窗户进入自己家的荒谬行为让人捧腹大笑。

【故事2】Mike was a terrible cook.One day, he decided to make dinner for his girlfriend.He spent hours in the kitchen, and when he finally served the meal, it was completely inedible.His girlfriend asked him, "What did you make?" Mike replied, "Well, it"s not quite soup, and it"s not quite stew, but you can call it "soupstew"!"幽默点:Mike的创新菜名“soupstew”让人忍俊不禁,体现了他的幽默感。

英语小故事幽默

英语小故事幽默

英语小故事幽默Title: The Talking Dog.One day, a man saw a sign outside a house that said, "Talking Dog for Sale." Intrigued, he knocked on the door and asked the owner if he could see the talking dog.The owner led him to the backyard where a dog was sitting. The man asked the dog, "Can you talk?"To the man's surprise, the dog replied, "Yes, I can talk. I discovered my ability to talk when I was just a puppy. I worked for the CIA, and my abilities were so exceptional that they used me for top-secret missions. I've traveled the world and have saved countless lives."The man was stunned and asked the owner, "Why are you selling such an extraordinary dog?"The owner replied, "Because he's a liar. He didn't do any of those things."笑话:说话的狗。

有一天,一个男人看到一个房子外面的牌子上写着:“出售会说话的狗”。

英语幽默小故事带翻译

英语幽默小故事带翻译
翻译:汤姆:你爱我只是因为我父亲留给我一大笔财产吗?
安妮:亲爱的,一点也不,不管是谁留给你钱,我都会爱你。
故事三:The Blind Man(盲人)
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing-eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head.
经理跑过去问那个男人,“你在干什么?!”
盲人回答,“我只是想看看周围。”
故事四:The Art of Conversation(交谈的艺术)
Teacher: “Can anyone give me three points of similarity between a giraffe and a refrigerator?”
英语幽默小故事带翻译
故事一:The Interview(面试)
John went for an interview at a big company. After the interview, the HR manager said, “You are very suitable for the job. But I'm afraid you won't be able to start until Monday.”
The manager runs up to the man and asks, “What are you doing?!”
The blind man responds, “Just looking around.”
翻译:一个盲人带着导盲犬走进一家商店。突然间,他抓起狗的牵引绳开始把狗甩到头顶上。

儿童英语幽默故事实用3篇

儿童英语幽默故事实用3篇

儿童英语幽默故事实用3篇儿童英语幽默故事1Early in the morning, the hippo came out for a walk as usual. The difference is that there is a foul smell in the air today. What is it? Where is it? The hippopotamus sniffed at it with its nose. The hippo looks around. Not only did he not know it, but his good friends were lions, hedgehogs, monkeys, and crocodiles who had just climbed up from the river. While looking, he asked, “where does it stink and where does it stink?""Look, what's that? The hedgehog sees a good big lump, the finger to that huge object ask everybody. Everyone came up to him. "wow, it's really smelly!" "Not only smelly, but also very big!" "And whose shit is this? I said it all in a word."Who can pull such a big shit? "Only such a large animal! "Are you talking about elephants? "I guess it's the sky! "Ha-ha, the sky won't grow! I haven't seen it! "But sometimes the sky will urinate, you are not wet! Ha ha ha ha." "Don't laugh at me, you too, ha-ha." "Ha ha ha." The prairie is remembered with happy laughter."Sorry, it's my shit. I'll sweep it off!" It was the poop of theelephant, no wonder it was so big! Good big ah! I haven't seen such a big shit. "The animals said to each other. "Why do you take such a big shit?" When they heard the crowd asking themselves, the elephant thought for a moment and said, "maybe I eat more." "Said the lion." we eat more, too. I have such a big shit to pull." "So do I." "Me too! The hippo heard all the people wanted, and said, "well, we'll all e here tomorrow morning to see who has the bigger shit!" Everyone agreed, and as soon as he got home, he ate it, and everyone wanted to take the big shit.Finally the next day, you e to guess who is the champion. And, of course, the elephant! What a big mess! The hedgehog said sadly, "well, my shit is the smallest. I went home yesterday and tried to eat it. I couldn't sleep at night. It's the smallest." "What are you doing? Look back, isn't this mom and dad? Why are they all here? "Shit everywhere? Come on, clean up your shit!" So the friends began to pack their shit. This time, the hedgehog won the championship.儿童英语幽默故事2His son's final exam results came out, and the former chief of the department who had been busy with the fake work heard the report from his son on the phone, saying that he had takenthe "double hundred" this year. Once the section chief was overjoyed, thought, son this time finally gave me to contend for light, more have the face, so, all the way hummed the little song to go home.According to your own reward plan, if you take the "double hundred", you will reward your son 200 yuan, otherwise you will have no money and even punish.Back at home, the son happily took out his report card to the former section chief. Was section chief looked at his son's report card, and his face suddenly overcast, the shine to collect 200 yuan in his hand into his pocket and said to the son, "the reward for this semester is free, you next semester's, take an examination of the" double hundred ", a reward to your dad."The son is somewhat unconvinced, timidly asks: "is you said to have the reward, I examined 'double hundred', why does the speech not calculate words?""Why didn't you reward me? You know better than I did. I didn't want to say anything to make you have a good summer vacation."Later that night, Mrs. Zeng asked him, "this little guy looks a little unconvinced. Last year, he got a double hundred. Yourewarded him. This year, he got a double hundred. Why didn't you reward him?"Zeng explained, "I saw the problem at the first glance of his report card, and his' double hundred 'was altered by himself, not at all. The two subjects scored 10 points, and the "0" was obviously wrong and the handwriting was very different."That" double hundred "was also his change last year, why do you still reward him?" "The wife wondered."He altered the" double hundred "last year I haven't see it, is I didn't see that careful resolution, that little one or a double hard, can achieve real ones. The means of cheating must not be what he did, but there must be someone behind him. Or you can copy it at the copy shop. I don't want to encourage my child to give him a taste, try to get real, and get rewarded for real results. Ah! It had been expected that the child could not understand my good intentions!"Is it good for you to do so? It's just encouraging kids to be fake, to have children, and to grow up to be criminals." "Said the wife."Such a clumsy method, see how I punish him tomorrow!" Zeng said angrily.儿童英语幽默故事3Words are the baby of the family. It is not only the long tiger that makes people like it. And small brains are quite clever.One day, the mother thought of trying to test her son's words, and gave him two arithmetic questions.First, the mother of a college teacher.Mother asked: words, you say, 1 + 1 is a few!Clever words, really clever, do not wait for mother's words to fall, immediately raised two fingers, milk to reply mother: 2!At this moment, I was so happy that I didn't know my mother, and immediately gave the smart son a big round of applause. Meanwhile, she hugged her son tightly and gave him a kiss on the cheek.Then the researcher's father got off the point.My father asked, "what is the one minus one?"The words at the moment did not answer as soon as they had answered their mother's question. He tilted his little head to one side and thought, and then made a face at his father, and held out a small fist with five fingers.This, can make the university teacher mother, and the researcher father confuses: words, son, you this is what ah!Then the words were happy, looking at the father and mother a puzzled look, xi xi smile: this is it this one finger has no!Mom and dad were surprised to hear such a big, unexpected answer. Both of them, together, took their son's words together and kissed them repeatedly: ah, it was a speech to hide and hide the cat from my father and mother! .At the moment in the ing days snuggling with mom and dad's arms, and raise a five fingers are tightly together little fist, 1 vigorously in pettish: is that is, the ing days to give mom and dad hide-and-seek! : hey! : hey! : hey! ......。

英语幽默小故事6篇

英语幽默小故事6篇

1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husbandasked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。

进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。

不过我们会给你们退票的。

”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。

”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。

”“我也不喜欢看。

”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。

”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said,"That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。

英语幽默故事小短文

英语幽默故事小短文

英语幽默故事小短文Once upon a time, there was a man who loved to tell jokes. He was known as the funniest person in his village, and people would gather around him just to hear his latest joke or funny story. One day, he decided to take his humor to the next level and try his luck in the big city.As soon as he arrived in the city, he started telling his jokes to everyone he met. At first, people laughed and enjoyed his humor, but soon they started to get tired of hearing the same jokes over and over again. The man didn't realize that he needed to come up with new material if he wanted to keep people entertained.One day, he came across a comedy club and decided to give it a try. He signed up for an open mic night and got on stage to perform. However, as soon as he started telling his jokes, the audience didn't find them funny at all. They were all bored and unimpressed with his performance.Feeling dejected, the man went to a nearby park to clear his head. As he sat on a bench, he noticed a group of children playing and laughing together. He couldn't help but smile at their innocence and joy. Suddenly, he had an idea. He decided to start telling his jokes to the children, and to his surprise, they found him absolutely hilarious.The man realized that he had been trying too hard to impress the wrong audience. From that day on, he became known as the best children's entertainer in the city. He would perform at birthday parties and school events, bringing laughter and joy to all the children he met.The moral of the story is that sometimes, we need to change our approach and find the right audience for our talents. Just because one group of people doesn't appreciate us, it doesn't mean that there isn't another audience out there who will love what we have to offer. We should always be open to new opportunities and never give up on sharing our gifts with the world. Laughter is a universal language, and there will always be someoneout there who will appreciate our sense of humor. So, let's keep spreading joy and happiness wherever we go!。

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇摘要:1.英语幽默小故事概述2.故事1:聪明的狗3.故事2:迟到的理由4.故事3:误解的笑话5.故事4:幸运的数字6.故事5:咖啡店的对决7.故事6:调皮的孙子8.故事7:语言障碍9.故事8:购物趣事10.故事9:意外的礼物11.故事10:简单的幸福12.总结:英语幽默小故事的启示正文:【英语幽默小故事概述】在这个世界上,幽默无处不在,英语幽默小故事更是让人忍俊不禁。

这里,我们为您精心准备了10篇英语幽默小故事,它们涵盖了日常生活、工作和人际交往等多个方面,不仅让您在轻松愉快的氛围中学习英语,还能领悟到人生哲理。

接下来,让我们一一领略这些故事的魅力吧!【故事1:聪明的狗】一天,一位主人带着他的狗去散步。

突然,狗发现了一个美味的骨头,于是它决定偷偷拿走。

主人发现了狗的意图,于是对它说:“如果你能用英语告诉我这个骨头的价值,我就让你拿走。

”狗想了想,用英语回答:“This bone is worth a lot.”主人听后笑了笑,把骨头给了狗。

这个故事告诉我们,学习英语是有好处的。

【故事2:迟到的理由】一个人因为迟到被同事嘲笑,他解释说:“我今天起床后发现家里的钟停了,所以我以为是早上7点。

结果,我以最快的速度赶到公司,结果还是迟到了。

”这个故事告诉我们,有时候,迟到的理由也能带来幽默。

【故事3:误解的笑话】一位外国游客在中国餐馆点了一份“狗不理包子”,结果服务员端上来一盘狗肉。

游客大怒,喊道:“我点的不是狗肉,是狗不理包子!”这个故事告诉我们,语言误解会导致笑话。

【故事4:幸运的数字】一位迷信的同事对公司里的每个人都说:“我的车牌号是168,意味着一路发,所以今天我一定会走运。

”结果,当天他出了车祸。

有人问他:“你的车牌号不是意味着一路发吗?怎么还会出车祸?”他回答:“是啊,可是我忘了,168还意味着一路傻瓜。

”【故事5:咖啡店的对决】一位顾客在咖啡店点了一杯咖啡,服务员问他:“您要加糖吗?”顾客回答:“不用,我已经够甜了。

幽默的英语小故事带翻译

幽默的英语小故事带翻译

幽默的英语小故事带翻译幽默的英语小故事带翻译有很多幽默搞笑版的小故事,如果带有中文翻译那就更加完美了。

下面就让店铺给大家分享带有翻译的幽默英文小故事吧,希望能对你有帮助!幽默英文小故事:New Discovery新发现A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.一个乡下人第一次到大城市游逛。

他走进一座大楼,看见一个岁数很大的矮胖女人迈进一个小房间。

房间的门随后关上,有几个灯在闪亮。

一会儿,门开了,电梯里走出一位年青漂亮的'女模特。

Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I should have brought my wife!"乡下人惊奇地眨着眼睛,慢吞吞地说:“我应该把我的老婆带来!”幽默英文小故事:如何清洗一只猫Thoroughly clean the toilet. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.仔细地打扫卫生间。

在马桶中加入适量的洗发乳,打开盖子。

带猫去卫生间的时候,小心地安慰它。

  1. 1、下载文档前请自行甄别文档内容的完整性,平台不提供额外的编辑、内容补充、找答案等附加服务。
  2. 2、"仅部分预览"的文档,不可在线预览部分如存在完整性等问题,可反馈申请退款(可完整预览的文档不适用该条件!)。
  3. 3、如文档侵犯您的权益,请联系客服反馈,我们会尽快为您处理(人工客服工作时间:9:00-18:30)。

200词英语幽默小故事
200词英语幽默小故事篇一
赶时髦
At the bank where I was employed as a teller we were not allowed to eat while working. But one day,five months pregnant,I was ravenous. I opened a bag of potato chips and started to devour them. Just then I spotted one of our best customers and his wife heading my way. Quickly, I wiped my mouth and greeted them. As I processed their transaction,I noticed they were looking at me oddly.
在银行我做出纳员,这里规定工作时不许吃东西。

但有一天,我因怀孕五个月有点嘴馋,打开了一包土豆片,开始偷吃起来。

这时,我看见一个熟悉的顾客和他的妻子朝我的窗口走来。

我匆忙地擦了一下嘴,向他们打了个招呼。

当我在给他们办理业务时,我注意到他们一直用一种异样的目光看着我。

On their way out, the man said, I don t understand these young people.
在他们往外走的路上,那个男的说: 我真搞不懂这些年轻人。


Dear,that s a fashion statement,his wife explained. It s a new type of brooch.
亲爱的,那是新潮。

他的妻子说; 那是一种新型的胸针饰物。

I looked down to see what could have caused such controversy. To my horror,a large potato chip was resting neatly on my left shoulder.
我低头上下打量了一下我自己,想找到是什么东西引起了他们这样说我。

使我大吃一惊的是,一大块土豆片稳稳当当地落在我的左肩上。

200词英语幽默小故事篇二
太敏感
Several years had passed since I worked for the federal government,but old habits died hard. A cable-television technician had just finished hooking up our service at home and told me he needed the 2185. I hadn t heard about this form before arid asked him,Where can I get that form 2185 ?
我从联邦政府退下来已经好几年了,但有些习惯却很难改掉。

一个有线电视的技术工人给我家连接完天线后,对我说他要2185。

我以前从没听见这个代号,便问: 我到哪儿能
领到这种表格?
Looking at me peculiarly, he replied. Ma am,it s money.$21.85.
那位工人吃惊地望了我一会儿,说: 夫人,那是钱,21块8毛5。

200词英语幽默小故事篇三
不可理解
When my husband and I decided to rent a car and drive to Oregon to visit family, we discovered that many rental agreements come with restrictions. I}fter several calls,I finally asked a sweet young agent if her company had any restrictions on taking its rental cars out of state. After a bewildered pause,she replied,Well. .. you have to bring it back.
我丈夫和我决定租辆车到俄勒冈去看亲戚,可是我们发现很多出租行的租借条款都有行车的范围限制。

这样打了几个电话后,我感到疚惫不堪。

当我用疲倦的声音问一个年轻
的代理,她的公司是否对出租的汽车也有不准开出本州范围的限制时,她犹豫了一下说: 那你必须要把它开回来。

相关文档
最新文档