史上最搞笑的英语笑话

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读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话笑话1:Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!笑话2:Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!笑话3:I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.笑话4:I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!笑话5:I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, "They're right behind you!"笑话6:Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!笑话7:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话8:I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.笑话9:I saw a wino eating grapes. I told him, "You have to wait!"笑话10:I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.笑话11:Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!笑话12:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话13:My friend told me that I should be more optimistic. I said, "Okay, I'm positive!"笑话14:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话15:Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them!笑话16:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!笑话17:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话18:I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.笑话19:I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.笑话20:Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!笑话21:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话22:What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!笑话23:Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!笑话24:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话25:Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!笑话26:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话27:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话28:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话29:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话30:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!以上是30个英文笑话的集合,希望你能通过阅读它们,享受一段愉快的时光并大笑一番!笑话的目的是为了带给我们快乐和轻松,让我们忘记生活中的压力和烦恼。

笑破肚皮的英语笑话

笑破肚皮的英语笑话

笑破肚皮的英语笑话
1
Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?
Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!
汤姆:妈妈,我可以吃两块蛋糕吗?
妈妈:当然可以----拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧!
2
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
小男孩问他的父亲:“爸爸,结婚要花多少钱?”
His father replied, "I don't know, son, because I'm
still paying for it now."
他的父亲答复说:“儿子,我不知道,因为我现在还在为它付账呢。


3
“闺女,香蕉用英语怎么说? ”“banana!”
“苹果呢?” “iPhone!”
“那大苹果呢?” “iPad!”
4
Student A: When do people talk least?
Student B: In February.
Student A: Why?
Student B: Because February is the shortest month of a year.
学生甲:人们在什么时候说话最少?学生乙:在二月。

学生甲:为什么呢?学生乙:因为二月是一年中最短的一个月。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]

20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]

1.we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿2.how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你,怎么老是你?3.you don"t bird me,i don"t bird you你不鸟我,我也不鸟你4.you have seed i will give you some color to see see,pothers !together up !你有种,我要给你点颜色瞧瞧,兄弟们,一起上!5.hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏,无事退朝6.you me you me彼此彼此7.you give me stop!!你给我站住!8.know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之,不知为不知...9.watch sister表妹10.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse" son can make hole!!龙生龙,凤生凤,老鼠的儿子大地洞11.american chinese not enough美中不足12.one car e one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13.heart flower angry open心花怒放14.go past no mistake past走过路过,不要错过15.小明:i am sorry!老外:i am sorry too!小明:i am sorry three!老外:what are you sorry for?小明:i am sorry five!16.if you want money,i have no;if you want life,i have one!要钱没有,要命一条17.i call li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大,今年25。

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感,而感到好笑。

下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。

In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上,老师问杰克:“请回答,世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答:“是手风琴。

”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问:“为什么是手风琴呢,英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说:“老师,您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上,汤姆的老师问同学们:“当打雷的时候,为什么我们先看到闪电,然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。

史上最搞笑的英语笑话带翻译

史上最搞笑的英语笑话带翻译

史上最搞笑的英语笑话带翻译英语幽默笑话带翻译1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."2:You can't go without meThe bus is very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him. "Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts."It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him."But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says. 没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路."喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道."车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说."但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.3:DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. Atthis age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," hisfather replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。

爆笑英文笑话带翻译

爆笑英文笑话带翻译

爆笑英文笑话带翻译爆笑英文笑话带翻译生活中烦心的琐事总是有的,你会有时不愉快,那你就来看笑话吧,开心一笑,烦心事就会溜走了。

以下是爆笑英文笑话带翻译,欢迎阅览!1.One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"一天,有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子,也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。

这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地上,手中抱着一头猪,并把它举得高高的`,好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。

城里人对农夫说,"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的,但是,这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫回答说,"时间对猪有什么意义?"2.a kiss At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "KISS" scribbled on it. The guest seated next to the speaker said, "Your wife must love you very much, I see her send you a 'KISS' before you begin your speech." The speaker smiled and explained, "You don't know my wife. The 'KISS' she give me stands for 'Keep It Short, Stupid.'"3.The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have aparty.Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment,he said,"Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow.When the door open,push with your foot.""Why use my elbow and foot?""Well,gosh," was the reply,"You're not coming empty-hangded,are you?吝啬鬼请客一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了.他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃.门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开.”“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”“你的双手得拿礼物啊.天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答.I think that I'm a chickenPsychiatrist:What's your problem?Patient:I think I'm a chicken.Psychiatrist:How long has this been going on?Patient:Ever since I was an egg!精神病医师:你哪里不舒服?病人:我认为我是一只鸡.精神病医师:这种情况从什么时候开始的?病人:从我还是一只蛋的时候开始.4.Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个笑话是一种能够带给人快乐,平添生活乐趣的文凭形式,以其机智、幽默、搞笑的特点,深受人们喜爱。

英语幽默小笑话就是一种给人带来快乐的黑色幽默渐层,也是美国人的一大特色文化。

以下是100个英语幽默小笑话:1、A: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?B: Dam!2、Q: What did the policeman say to his belly?A: Freeze!3、Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?A: Right where you left it.4、Q: What did the tie say to the hat?A: You go on a head, and I hang around.5、Q: Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?A: He wanted to improve his bite.6、Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?A: Dam!7、Q: What did the tree say to autumn?A: Leaf me alone.8、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!9、Q: What did the monster say when he swallowed a clown?A: You taste funny.10、Q: Why don scientists trust atoms?A: Because they make up everything.11、Q: How do you make a tissue dance?A: You put a little boogie in it.12、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.13、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug.14、Q: Why don vampires like going to parties?A: They don like to get sucked into conversations.15、Q: What did the bee say when it hit the window?A: Oh, buzz off!16、Q: Why did the scarecrow get promoted?A: Because he was outstanding in his field.17、Q: What did the barrel say to the other barrel?A: We can stand each other!18、Q: How do you make a hoodie laugh?A: Tell it a joke hoodie-style.19、Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: Put it on my bill.20、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.21、Q: why don astronauts play cards in space?A: Because they float away!22、Q: How do you make an octopus laugh?A: With ten-tickles.23、Q: What did the sheep say to the shepherd?A: Nothing, it just baa-ed.24、Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?A: Odor in the court!25、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!26、Q: What did the helium balloon say to the air?A: Nothing, it just let out a little squeak.27、Q: What did the computer say when it crashed?A: Hey, I having a bad day!28、Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?A: Nice belt!29、Q: What did the paperclip say to the magnet?A: I find you very attractive.30、Q: What did the silverware say to the plate?A: You complete me!31、Q: What did the pirate say when he turned 80?A: Aye matey!32、Q: What did the light bulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!33、Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? A: You too young to smoke!34、Q: What did the clock say to the other clock?A: Don worry, I right behind you.35、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!36、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!37、Q: What did the hamburger say to the hotdog?A: We make a great pair!38、Q: What did the rain say to the dirt?A: Let go make some mud pies!39、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!40、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?A: Dam!41、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug!42、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!43、Q: What did the alien say to the dad?A: Take me to your leader!44、Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?A: Hold on to your leaves!45、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!46、Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?A: Let go for a hop!47、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!48、Q: What did the rock say to the cliff?A: Hang in there!49、Q: What did the letter say to the envelope?A: Let stick together!50、Q: What did the mama bee say to her lazy bee?A: Wake up and Bee productive!51、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!52、Q: What did the egg say to the frying pan?A: You crack me up!53、Q: What did the key say to the lock?A: It so nice to see you again!54、Q: What did the snail say to the turtle?A: Hurry up!55、Q: What did the cowboy say to the cactus?A: How it hanging?56、Q: What did the doctor say to the patient?A: Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.57、Q: What did the bicycle say to the car?A: You may be faster, but I more fun!58、Q: What did the two antennas say to each other? A: You look good, girl!59、Q: What did the octopus say to the philosopher? A: I think, therefore I am eight!60、Q: What did the big hand say to the little hand? A: Let get to work!61、Q: What did the tomato say to the other tomato? A: You looking a little red today.62、Q: What did the duck say to the waiter?A: Put it on my bill.63、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!A: Bee yourself!65、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Worm your way out!66、Q: What did the fish say to the whale?A: You a big fish in a small pond.67、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!68、Q: What did the teapot say to the cup?A: Time for a cup of tea!69、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Buzz off!70、Q: What did the noodle say to the other noodle? A: Let have a pasta party!71、Q: What did the alarm clock say to the bed?A: Time to wake up!72、Q: What did the tree say to the wind?A: Leaf me alone!73、Q: What did the tree say to the other tree?A: What a re-leaf!74、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall? A: Dam!A: You looking sharp!76、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: Let work it out!77、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Wanna come out and play?78、Q: What did the elephant say to the mouse?A: You so tiny!79、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Let make honey!80、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!81、Q: What did the frog say to the fly?A: Time for dinner!82、Q: What did the pizza say to the oven?A: Let get cooking!83、Q: What did the fish say when it saw a boat?A: That a big hook!84、Q: What did the elephant say when he saw the mouse? A: That tiny!85、Q: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? A: We have a lot in common!86、Q: What did the ball say to the other ball?A: Let play catch!87、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Bee mine!88、Q: What did the ice cream cone say to the other ice cream cone?A: Let have a scoop!89、Q: What did the tree say to the axe?A: Chop chop!90、Q: What did the pencil say to the eraser?A: Let work it out!91、Q: What did the horse say when it tripped?A: Neigh!92、Q: What did the scarecrow say when it got promoted? A: I outstanding in my field!93、Q: What did the pelican say to the other pelican? A: Let go for a dive!94、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Hey, bee-friend!95、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Let make honey!96、Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!97、Q: What did the firefly say to the other firefly? A: Let light up the night!98、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!99、Q: What did the spider say to the fly?A: You in my web now!100、Q: What did the bee say to the beekeeper?A: Let me out of this hive!从上述100个英语幽默小笑话可以看出,英语幽默小笑话涵盖了生活中的各种场景,不论是小动物、植物、机械还是自然现象,都能以机智、幽默、搞笑的方式进行描述。

令人喷饭的英语笑话有翻译

令人喷饭的英语笑话有翻译

令人喷饭的英语笑话有翻译导语:你知道学些笑话的好处么?当第一次见面的时候,总是有不知道该说什么的为难,这时候你就需要一些笑话,来缓解一下气氛呢,这里为你收集了令人喷饭的英语笑话有翻译,希望能对你有所帮助哈! 1 TOM'S EXCUSE Teacher:Tom,why are you late for school every day? Tom:Every time I e to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go Slow". 汤姆的借口老师:汤姆,您为什么每天上学迟到? 汤姆:我每次路过拐角,一个路标上面写着:"学校----慢行." 2 One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a position——IfI am a manager. All the students began to write excepta boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason.“I am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer. 一天课上,老师要同学们以“如果我是一个经理”为题写一篇作文。

所有的学生都在动笔写了,只有一个男生例外。

老师走过去问他为什么不写。

“我在等我的秘书”。

那孩子答道。

3 When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already oupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"xiao84. "I wasn't asleep," the man answered. "Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed." "I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car." 我没有睡着当一群妇女上车之后,车上的座位全都被占满了。

十个英语笑话爆笑超短

十个英语笑话爆笑超短

十个英语笑话爆笑超短1、What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home2、"What is the thinnest book in the world? ""What men know about women."""3、"苦命的salesman An insect repellent salesman tried to sell his product to a farmer. He said he wasn""t interested because he hadn""t seen any bugs or insects on his farm for years. The salesman indicated he had a wife and four kids and really needed the money. The......"4、"运动世家A German, Englishman and American are traveling ona train. They get bored and start telling each other about their families. The German says I have 4 kids, one more and they""ll make a basketball team. The Englishman says huh!Thats nothing, I have 10 boys,&nbs......"5、"FLOWERS It means that... You love the beauty of nature, the scent of flowers and appreciate this timeless romantic gesture. OR You get some twisted joy out of watching vegetation wither and die."6、"Revealing Gift Test Which gift would you like? To determine your personality, pick the gift you""d most like to receive."7、"A SWEET POEM It means that... You""re a hopeless romantic, a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the writtenword. OR You""re used to cheap gifts and like to pass yourself off as a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the w......"8、"A married couple on the farm are visited by an alien couple. The alien couple asked the human couple if they would like to swap partners for sex.They agree, the human woman and alien man are together. She says, ""You have a small penis!""The alien man replies, ""pull my ears!""......A man enters a barber shop for a shave.While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problem he has getting a close shave around his cheeks.""I have just the thing,"" says the barber, taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. ""Just place this between your cheek and gum.""......"9、"A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. ""Screw me or climb the ladder to success,"" she said......."10、"同学是某偏远地区的,英语发音一直不标准,老师英文也是发不准,所以学生更是一口地道的土腔英语。

幽默的英语笑话

幽默的英语笑话

幽默的英语笑话以下是六个幽默的英语笑话及翻译:1. Why is the doctor so angry? (为什么医生那么生气?)Because he has no patience.(因为他没有耐心呀。

)笑点:耐心=patience,病人(复数形式)=patients,两个词读音相似,一语双关。

2. What is the longest word in the English language?(英语里最长的单词是?)Smiles. Because there is a mile between its first and last letters.(Smiles,因为它的首尾字母之间隔了一英里那么长。

)笑点:翻译时需要保留smiles,因为中文不分单复数,这里规避了字面意义上的最长,而是利用了单词mile 的含义。

3. What do you call a deer with no eyes?(你把没有眼睛的鹿叫做什么?)No idea.(不知道。

)笑点:deer 和idea 读音相似,这里是谐音梗。

4. Two cats are on a roof. Which one slides off first?(两只猫在屋顶上,哪只先滑下来?)The one with the smaller mew!(叫声更小的那只!)笑点:mew 是猫叫的拟声词,这里也可以理解为mu(摩擦系数),根据物理定律,摩擦系数越小,物体越容易滑动。

5. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?(当你把一个雪人跟一个吸血鬼结合起来,会得到什么?)Frostbite.(霜冻。

)笑点:frostbite 有霜冻和冻伤的意思,这里是双关。

6. What's the best thing to put into a pie?(什么东西放在馅饼里最好?)Your teeth.(你的牙齿。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短1.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!2.I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.3.What did the grape say after the elephant sat on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.4.How does a penguin build its house?Igloos it together!5.Why don’t skeletons fight each other?They don’t have the guts!6.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!7.Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!8.Why don’t eggs tell jokes?Because they might crack up!9.Why was the math book sad?Because it had too many problems!10.What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?An abdominal snowman!11.Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?It was two-tired!12.How does a cucumber become a pickle?It goes through a jarring experience!13.What do you call a bear with no teeth?A gummy bear!14.Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?Because he was always spotted!15.Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negativenumbers?He will stop at nothing to avoid them!16.Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?Because then they would be bagels!17.What kind of tree fits in your hand?A palm tree!18.Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?Because they taste funny!19.How do you organize a space party?You planet!20.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!以上是20个英语笑话爆笑超短的集合。

五则幽默趣味英语笑话

五则幽默趣味英语笑话

五则幽默趣味英语笑话推荐文章经典趣味幽默笑话阅读热度:简短搞笑英文笑话_幽默故事带翻译热度:关于英语小笑话大全热度:又幽默又短的英语笑话热度:二年级英语幽默笑话带翻译热度:幽默笑话,能让你在信手翻启间开怀一笑,得到身心的彻底放松、心绪的怦然萌动、情感的欣然释放。

下面店铺为大家带来幽默趣味的英语笑话五则,欢迎大家阅读!幽默趣味英语笑话:马打电话来了A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of thei head with a frying pan. He asks, "What was that for ?"She says, " I found a piece of paper in your pocket with'Betty Sue' written on it.' Ha says, "Jeez,honey, 'Betty Sue'was the name of the horse I bet on.H She shrugs and walks away.一个家伙正在看报纸,他的妻子走到他身后,用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。

他问道:“这是为什么?”她说:“我在你口袋里发现了一张写有‘BettY Sue’的纸条。

"他说:¨哎呀,亲爱的,‘BettYSue’是我赌的那匹马的名字。

口她耸了耸肩,走了。

Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?一she answers, "Your horse called."三天后,他正在看报纸,妻子走到他身后,又用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏一些幽默的英语笑话,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享20个英语笑话爆笑超短,希望大家喜欢这些英语笑话!20个英语笑话爆笑超短篇一1.Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。

”“不要相信梦,亲爱的。

据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。

”妈妈答道。

“那么,我真希望在今晚的梦中,我的其他功课都不及格。

”汤姆说。

2.On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。

10个超逗的英语笑话(中英文对照)

10个超逗的英语笑话(中英文对照)

Patient: I know, but you are standing on my foot!
他为什么喊
牙医:请你不要再喊了!我还没碰你的牙呢。
病人:我知道,可是你正踩着我的脚呀!
浪费还是节约
父亲:噢,杰克,你又睡了一上午。难道你不知道你这是在浪费时间吗?
杰克:我知道,爸爸。可我还给您节省了一顿饭呢,是不是?
Why Is He Howling
Dentist: Please stop howling. I haven"t even touched your tooth yet.
"That"s terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
总感到口渴
一个男人对他的朋友说:“我动了一次手术,手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。”
“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道:“你觉得疼吗?”
"Be quiet, " said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"
医生懂得多
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院。他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:“我想他伤得很厉害。”
医生说:“恐怕他已经死了。”
听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:“我没死,我还活着。”
妈妈:不知道,宝贝,是什么呀?
凯特:一把漂亮的茶壶。
妈妈:可是我已经有一把漂亮的茶壶了呀。
凯特:不,你没有了。我刚刚把它给摔了。
The Doctor Knows Better

搞笑的英语笑话带翻译

搞笑的英语笑话带翻译
这个笑话利用了骷髅没有内脏的事实,并加以戏谑,形成了一个幽默的场景。
笑话四:What do you get vampire? Frostbite! 当你把雪人和吸血鬼混合在一起,得到什么?冻伤!
这个笑话利用了两个不相干的元素进行组合,形成了一个令人忍俊不禁的效果。
通过学习和理解这些搞笑的英语笑话带翻译,我们不仅能够提高英语水平,还能更好地了解英语国家的文化和幽默传统。同时,也能够在日常生活中运用这些幽默的表达方式,增进与人的交流,营造轻松愉快的氛围。笑话不仅给人带来快乐,还能够增进人与人之间的情感交流,是一种很好的社交工具。所以,多多学习和分享笑话,让幽默成为我们生活中的一部分。
这些英语笑话不仅仅是用语言表达幽默,还是一种思维的创新,是一种跨文化交流的方式。这些笑话在英语国家以及全球广泛传播,无论是孩子还是成年人,都能从中获得快乐。笑话的翻译也是一项挑战,需要保持原意的幽默,同时还要符合另一种语言的表达习惯和文化背景。所以,将这些笑话翻译成其他语言需要一定的语言功底和文化素养。
笑话二:What do you call a bear with no teeth? Gummy bear! 没有牙齿的熊叫什么?软糖熊!
这个笑话利用了音近字的幽默,gummy bear在英语中有两个意思,一个是指一种软糖,另一个是指没有牙齿的熊。所以这个笑话的答案就是双关,又引人发笑。
笑话三:Why don't skeletons fight each other? Because they don't have the guts! 为什么骷髅不互相打架?因为它们没有内脏!
搞笑的英语笑话带翻译
笑话一:Why did the bicycle fall over? 因为它们两轮中的一个。

英文笑话带翻译爆笑

英文笑话带翻译爆笑
为什么自行车不能独立站立呢?因为它双胎了。
2. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
怎么让纸巾跳舞呢?你往上放点音乐
3. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是生活中的调剂品,能够给人带来欢乐和放松。而英文笑话更是不同国家和地区都能理解的笑话形式,让人们在跨国交流中也能共享欢乐。下面就给大家带来一些经典的英文笑话,并附上中文翻译,一起来欣赏一下吧!
1. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
你怎样称呼不是你的奶酪呢?墨西哥煎玉米饼奶酪。
6. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
我告诉我妻子她应该接受自己的错误,她给了我一个拥抱。
以上是一些笑话不仅仅能给我们带来快乐,还能锻炼我们的英语听力和理解能力。希望大家在学习英语的道路上能够轻松愉快,充满笑声!
听说游乐场有绑架事件吗?他们醒来了。
4. Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
为什么骷髅不打架呢?因为他们没有胆量。
5. What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.

爆笑到不行的英语笑话大全

爆笑到不行的英语笑话大全

爆笑到不行的英语笑话大全笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。

笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。

下面是店铺带来的爆笑到不行的英语笑话,欢迎阅读!爆笑到不行的英语笑话篇一病人和他的大夫A woman complained that her husband constantly hung around the house,doing or saying nothing. T o please her, he went to see a psychiatrist.“Just lie down on the couch and we'll talk. "the doctor told him. "If you think of something to say, fine. If not,maybe next time.”一位妇女总是抱怨其丈夫在家里转来转去,无所事是,为了使老婆高兴,他找到了精神病学专家。

“你就躺在沙发上,我们来谈谈。

”精神病医生告诉他:“如呆你想起什么就说,没有的话,下次再讲也行。

”The guy got himself comfortable and fell fast asleep. At the end of the hour,the doctor woke hirn up and said,"That will be all for today—$100,please. "The patient paid and left.这位男士舒适地躺在沙发上,很快就入睡了。

到了一小时,大夫唤醒了他说:“今天就到这儿吧,请交100元。

”病人付了钱之后就走了,从此,那个人每周三、四来就诊。

每次,他总是一句话也不说,光是睡觉,而且每次都付钱。

第三周,病人来后坐下,然后又跳了起来。

The man came back every Tuesday and Thursday after that. Each time,he fell asleep without saying a word,but paid the fee. The third week, the patient came in,sat down and then jumped right up again."Aha,", marveled the doctor. "Have you thought of something to say?"“啊哈!”大夫惊喜道,“你想出要说的话了吗?”"Yes,do you need a partner ?"“是的,你需要一个助手吗?”爆笑到不行的英语笑话篇二执行指令My friend Gilbert and some other truck drivers were to deliver loads of gravel out in the country. The directions they were given said to go down a certain road and, when they came to a cow tied to a fence post, to turn right.我朋友吉尔波特和一些卡车司机到农村去送沙石。

2024年史上最爆笑英语笑话

2024年史上最爆笑英语笑话
教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时,他的话题又来了:让我向进化论者提个问题如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴,那么现在尾巴到哪里去了?
I'll venture an answer, said an old lady. We have worn them off sitting here so long..
因为那个可怜的笨蛋正考虑要结婚呢。
史上最爆笑英语笑话(二)
San Serriffe
虚拟国家
image1977: The British newspaper The Guardian published a special seven-page supplement devoted to San Serriffe, a small republic said to consist of several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean. A series of articlesaffectionately described the geography and culture of this obscure nation. Its two main islands were named Upper Caisse and Lower Caisse. Its capital was Bodoni, and its leader was General Pica. The Guardian's phones rang all day as readers sought more information about the idyllic holiday spot. Only a few noticed that everything about the island was named after printer's terminology。

让人爆笑的英语笑话大全你一定会笑

让人爆笑的英语笑话大全你一定会笑

让人爆笑的英语笑话大全你一定会笑推荐文章有关爆笑英语小笑话带翻译热度:爆笑小学生英文小笑话大全孩子喜欢的热度:关于英语的儿童爆笑笑话热度:爆笑有趣的儿童英语小笑话热度:爆笑幽默的英语笑话热度:笑话是日常生活中人们消遣娱乐的一种常见语言现象,其目的在于在会话过程中传递和激发幽默感。

小编精心收集了让人爆笑的英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!让人爆笑的英语笑话:Bring Me a Glass of Milk 捎杯牛奶At 2 a. m. Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living room. "Tiptoe downstairs," she told her husband. "Don't turn on the lights. Sneak1 up him before he knows what's happening."Dutifully, Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door, his wife added, "And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk."半夜两点时,科尔肯太太确信自己听到客厅里有贼,就对丈夫说:“别开灯,轻手轻脚地下楼,悄悄地靠近他,别被他发觉。

”科尔肯先生义无反顾地披上外套,前去捉贼。

刚走到卧室门口,他的妻子又加了一句:“回来的时候给我捎杯牛奶。

”让人爆笑的英语笑话:Flunking Math 数学没及格My son, who made the dean's list in his freshman1 year at Ball State University in Muncie, Indiana, called home a few weeks after starting his sophomore2 year as a psychology3student."Mom," he said excitedly, "I have found the answer to surviving college! It isn't the grades that are so important, but the quality of what is learned and how it is applied4 to daily life. I'm lucky to be having these wonderful experiences!""And just what does this mean?" I asked."I'm flunking5 math." he replied.我的儿子是印第安那市曼西尔波州立大学的学生,大学一年级的时候,他的名字就被列在了系主任的表扬名单上。

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史上最搞笑的英语笑话冷笑话是一种新兴的语言现象,伴随着网络的普及它已经渗透到了青年群体的日常生活。

下面小编整理了史上最搞笑的英语笑话,希望大家喜欢!史上最搞笑的英语笑话摘抄把我吓个半死(中英)A woman was walking along the beach when she saw a bottle on the sand. She picked it up and removed its top. Whoosh! A big puff of smoke appeared.一位妇女正在沿着海滩散步,突然她看见沙滩上有个瓶子。

她捡起了瓶子,拔开了瓶塞。

呼的一声,冒起一股浓烟。

"You have released me from my prison,”the genie told her. "To show my thanks, I’11 grant you three wishes. But take care, for with each wish,your mate, will receive double of whatever you request.”“你把我从囚禁中解救了出来,”妖怪对她说:“为了表示对你的感谢,我将满足你三个愿望。

但是要注意,你每实现一个愿望,你的丈夫会得到双倍你所要求的东西。

”"Why?" The woman asked. "He left me for another woman.”“为什么?他为了另一个女人抛弃了我。

”这位妇女问。

"That is how it is written,”replied the ge nie.“只能如此。

”妖怪回答道。

The woman shrugged and then asked for a million dollars. There was a flash of light, and a million appeared at her feet. At the same instant, in a distant place,her husband was down to see twice that amount at his feet.这位妇女很无奈地耸了耸肩,要了一百万美元。

一道亮光闪过,在她的脚下出现了一百万美元。

与此同时,在遥远的地方,她的丈夫正在看着脚下双倍数目的钱。

"And your second wish?"“你的第二个愿望呢?”"Genie, I want the world's most expensive diamond necklace.” Another flash of light, and the woman was holding the precious treasure. And in that remote place, her husband was wondering what had made so many precious stones come to him from nowhere at all.“妖怪,我想要世界上最贵重的钻石项链。

”有一道亮光闪过,这个妇女的手中便出现了这贵重的宝物。

在那个遥远的地方,她的丈夫正在奇怪从什么地方冒出这么多宝石来。

"Genie,is it really true that my husband has two million dollars and more jewels than I do, and that he gets double of whatever I wish for?“妖怪,我丈夫真的拥有了两百万美元,还有比我更多财宝,而且不论我要什么,他就能得到双倍吗?”The genie said it was indeed true.妖怪说确实如此。

Okay,genie,I’ m ready for my Last wish,” the woman said. "Scare me half to death.”“好了,妖怪,我已经想好了我的最后一个愿望了。

”这位妇女说二“把我吓个半死吧。

”史上最搞笑的英语笑话鉴赏谁最臭(中英)A grocer, a banker and a politician got lost in the forest. Eventually they came to a farmer's house and asked if he could put them up overnight.一个杂货商、一个银行家和一个政客在森林里迷了路。

最后,他们来到一家农舍,询问是否能在此住宿。

“Sure,”the farmer said, “but I've got room for only two of you in the house. The other will have to sleep in the barn with theanimals, and the smell is very bad out there.”“没问题,”农户说,“可是我的房子里只能安排得下两个人,另外一个得到牲口棚跟牲口睡在一起,那里的气味很难闻。

”"I'll sleep in the barn,” the banker volunteered.“我去牲口棚睡。

”银行家自告奋勇。

Half an hour later a knock was heard on the farmer's houses door, and there stood the banker, gasping," I can't take the smell.”半个小时以后,他们听到有人敲门,银行家站在门口,喘着粗气:“那种气味我真的受不了。

”"All right,” said the grocer. "I' 11 sleep in the barn. "And off he went.“好吧,”杂货商说:“我去牲口棚睡,”转身他就走了。

In a while there was another knock on the door. "I've put up with some rank odors from spoiled food,” the grocer complained," but that barn tops them all.”不久,又响起了敲门的声音。

“就连变质的食物恶臭我都能忍受,”他说,“但是,牲口棚的气味r以十么都难闻。

”"You two sissies,” said the politician" I'11 sleep in the barn.”“你们两个真的没用,”政客说,“我去那儿睡。

”Thirty minutes later came another knock. When they opened the door There stood all the animals from the barn.半个小时以后,又响起了敲门声。

他们打开门,看到牲口棚的所有牲口都站在门口。

史上最搞笑的英语笑话赏析自己来(中英)An old friend from abroad, whom I was expecting to stay with me, telephoned from the airport to tell me that he had arrived. I was still at the office at the time, but I had made arrangements for his arrival. After explaining where my new flat was, I told him that I had left the key under the room一mat. As I was likely tobe home rather late, I advised him to go into the kitchen and help himself to food and drink.一位国外来的老朋友从飞机场打电话,告诉我他已经到达,我一直期盼着与他相聚。

那时,我仍在办公室里,不过对于他的到来我已做好了安排。

说清我的新公寓的位置后,我告诉他把钥匙放在擦脚的垫子下面。

由于我可能很晚才能回家,我建议他到厨房自己弄点吃喝的东西。

Two hours later my friend telephoned me from the flat. At the moment, he was listening to some of my records after having just had a truly wonderful meal. He had found a pan on the gas stove and fried two eggs and had helped himself to some cold chicken from the refrigerator. Now, he said, he was drinking a glass of orange juice and he hoped I would join him. When I asked him if he had reached the flat without difficulty, he answered that be had not been able to find the key under the room-mat , but fortunately the living-room window just by the apple tree had been left open and he had climbed in. I listened to all this in astonishment. There is no apple tree in front of my living-room, but there is one in front of my neighbor’s!两个小时后朋友从公寓打电话给我。

他说,美餐了一顿以后,他现在正在听我的一些磁带。

在煤气炉上,他找到了一个平底煎锅,煎了两个鸡蛋,并吃了冰箱里的冻鸡肉。

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