(004-B9-W1+2)剑桥雅思第九本第一套作文题分析Writing Task

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Writing Task 1
The two maps below show an island, before the construction of some tourist facilities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
Write at least 150 words
Passage 1
Official Book Recommend --A
Key Points:本文是雅思7分作文,考官评价说关于住宿的内容不足,组合描述不够详细,语法准确,句式多样,有部分错误但不影响理解。

各位烤鸭注意辨别咯。

The two maps show the same island while first one is before and the second one is after the construction for tourism.
Looking first at the one before construction, we can see a huge island with a beach in the west.The total length of the island is approximately 250 meters.
Moving on to the second map, we can see that there are lots of building on the island. There are two areas of accommodation. One is in the west near the beach while the other one is in the center of the island. Between them, there is a restaurant in the north and a central reception block, which is surrounded by a vehicle track. This track also goes down to the pier where can go sailing in the south sea of the island. Furthermore, tourists can swim near the beach in the west. A footpath connecting the west accommodation units also leads to the beach.
Overall, comparing the two maps, there are significant changes after this development. Not only lots of facilities are built on the island, but also the sea is used for activities. The new island has become a good place for tourism.
New Channel Recommend--B
Key Points: No.1-No.7
Attention: 建议用“过去时”和“现在完成时”
The Two maps illustrate an island before and after various facilities for tourists were constructed there.
Before, this island simply had some trees and a beach at its western end. Now, the trees and beach are still there, but other things have been added to the island. On the southern side of the island, a pier has been built for bouts. A vehicle track leads north from the pier to a reception. The track goes around the reception and then further on to a restaurant on the north side of the island. To the east and west of the reception, accommodation has been built. There are six huts to the west nine to the east. These two groups have been constructed around two circular footpaths with a short footpath leading to each hut. In the west, there is another footpath from the huts to the beach, where swimming is available.
(151 words)
R’s opinion of these two passages: 和考生的作文相比,新航道的文章更加有逻辑有条理,简
单有序,同时句式变换也不输于考生。

Writing Task 2
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school
Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons include relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience
Write at least 250 words
Passage 2
Official Book Recommend --A
Comment:语言风格舒缓,有理有节有据,是一篇十分难得的好作文
Traditionally, children have begun study foreign languages at secondary school, but introducing them earlier is recommended by some educationalists. This policy has been adopted by some educational authorities or individual schools, with both positive and negative outcomes.
(陈说现状,陈述事实,自然而然表明自己观点,开始作文)
The obvious argument in its favour is that young children pick up language much easily than teenagers. Their brains are still programmed to acquire their mother tongue, which facilitates learning another language, and unlike adolescents, they are not inhibited by self-consciousness. (早学外语好的事实)
The greater flexibility of the primary timetable allows for more frequent, shorter sessions and for a play-centred approach, thus maintaining learner’s enthusiasm and progress, while learning other languages subsequently will be easier for them. They may also gain a better understanding of other cultures.
(继续陈说早学外语的好处)
There are, however, some disadvantages. Primary school teachers are generalists, and may not have the necessary language skills themselves. If specialists have to be brought in to deliver these sessions, the flexibility referred to above is diminished. If primary school teaching is not standardised, secondary schools could be faced with a great variety of levels in different languages within their intake, resulting in a classroom experience which undoes the earlier gains. There is no advantage if enthusiastic primary pupils become demotivated as soon as they change schools. However, these issues can be addressed strategically within the policy adopted.
(分析早学外语的缺点,但提出解决方案,点睛之笔)
Anything which encourages language learning benefits society culturally and economically, and early exposure to language learning contributes to this. Young children’ innate ability should be harnessed to make these benefits more achievable.
(从长远宏观面重述早学的好处,结束作文)
(255 words)
New Channel Recommend--B
Suggestion:题目分析实际是讨论“学外语早晚”,勿跑题。

格式四段为宜:首段提自己观点,接下来两段为分析优劣段,各一段分析即可,注意第三段结尾要和首段观点一致,方面尾段
陈说,尾段即呼应首段完成作文即可。

(“新航道”推荐了两篇文章,在此,编者选择了雅思官方推荐的那篇文章观点一致的新航道文章,以做对比分析。

与小作文相比,“新航道”这篇作文水平略输“雅思官方推荐文章”一筹)
Commend:文章结构是完全没有问题的,但用词偏口语化,缺乏学术性,作文毕竟还是学术性文章。

句式变化也比较单调。

中国人语言风格十分明显,请各位烤鸭注意。

In this essay, I shall explain why I think that it is better for children to begin learning foreign languages at primary school than at secondary school.
(开门见山说观点)
The main reason that I believe this is that the children at primary school are younger than those at secondary school and, in my experience, younger children learn languages faster than older children. Of course, this does not mean that I think children at primary schools should be taught the complex aspects of foreign languages, but they can easily be taught some simple vocabulary and grammar structures. By beginning to learn foreign languages at primary school, when the children move to secondary school, they have mastered the basic knowledge of the foreign language and can start to learn more complex vocabulary and sentence structures. This means that, by the time they finish secondary school, they have a greater ability in the foreign languages they have learnt.
(早学外语的好处,观点有一定逻辑性)
Some people think that children at primary school level might confuse the foreign languages with their native language or not fully understand the differences between the foreign languages and their own language. I disagree. In my experience, children can confuse languages if they learn two at the same time, but this is temporary and easy to correct(我个人以为本句式太过于口语化). I do not think it is necessary for children to fully understand the differences between languages. When adults learn a few phrases in a foreign language, they do not have this understanding.
(说缺点,最后折回说事实转到尾端)
To summarise, I think children should start learning foreign languages at primary school rather than at secondary school.
(总结,重复首段)
(262 words)。

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