2018届高三英语译林版(江苏专用)一轮复习第3部分第2板块文体写作强化第9节如何写记叙文的主体
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⑨Since then I have known that one should focus on one thing before it is well done.⑩As a Senior Three student，having set a clear goal，I will give priority to it，trying to resist any temptation.⑪I'm fully aware that only with a determined mind can I achieve my goal.
[句式改写] 1.用 only 倒装句改写句②中的宾语从句 The elephant revealed that
. 2.用强调句改写句③ Inspired by what the elephant said，I realized
.
【答案】 1.only when one's senses and attention were focused would calmness be obtained 2.it is the ability to focus one's attention that is the key to success
3．注意事项 (1)注意时态的运用。记述经历类的记叙文，无论写人还是记事，通常以过 去时态为主。如果所写的内容不但有过去的人和事，而且还有现在的人和事， 那么对过去的人和事应采用过去时态，对现在的人和事应采用现在时态。 (2)注意人称的一致性。要根据题目的要求选用合适的人称，做到上下文人 称一致。 (3)篇章结构。通常以时间或事件发展的顺序为线索，有时也可采用倒叙手 法。详写主要情节，略写次要情节。
They dug until they had turned up the soil from one end of the orchard to the other，round the tree roots and between them.But no pot of gold was to be found.It seemed as if someone must have stolen it，or as if the farmer had been wandering in his wits.The three sons were bitterly disappointed to have all their work for nothing.The next olive season，the olive trees in the orchard bore more fruit than they had ever given；when it was sold，it gave the sons a whole pot of gold.
The elephant said，“My senses do not rule my attention.Whatever I do，I get involved in it.Now that I am eating，I am completely absorbed in eating.In this way I can enjoy my food and chew it better.I rule and control my attention.When you are in charge of your senses and attention，your mind will become calm.”
【写作内容】 1．以约 30 个单词概括短文的内容； 2．然后以约 120 个单词就“专注”这一主题发表你的看法，包括以下要点： (1)看完故事后的感受及启发； (2)描述一次你或他人因受太多干扰而使学习、生活或工作受到影响的经历； (3)你打算在高三这一年里如何保持专注。
【写作要求】 1．可以参照阅读材料的内容，但不得直接引用原文中的句子； 2．作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称。 【评分标准】 内容完整，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当。
[满分缘由] 1.行文架构 (1)概括短文内容
↓ (2)通过衔接过渡语(Inspired by what the elephant said...)引出主题：专注是 成功的关键
↓ (3)描述经历：自己初中时参加多种课外活动导致考试不及格
↓ (4)打算：在高三阶段如何保持专注
2.亮点词汇 constantly，obtain，focus one's attention，distract，sign up，consequently， give priority to，set a clear goal，achieve one's goal 3.亮点句式 句①含有 who 引导的非限制性定语从句； 句②、句⑤、句⑨含有宾语从句； 句③、句⑩使用了过去分词和现在分词作状语； 句④含有状语从句的省略。
【谋篇】 第一段：概括短文内容。 第二段：衔接过渡语引出主题句。 第三段：描述一次受干扰的范文】 ①An elephant was constantly disturbed by a restless fly，who wondered
about the secret of remaining calm.②The elephant revealed that calmness would be obtained when one's senses and attention were focused.
When the farmer felt that his time had come to die，he called the three sons to him and said，“My sons，there is a pot of gold hidden in the olive orchard.Dig for it， if you wish it.”After the farmer was dead，the sons went to work to find the pot of gold.Since they did not know where the hidingplace was，they agreed to begin in a line，at one end of the orchard，and to dig until one of them should find the money.
出现在读写任务型作文中的记叙文要求学生描述一件与原阅读材料有关联 的事件，并说出自己从事件中得到的启示或对所描述现象发表自己的看法。
1．写作步骤 概括原文―→衔接过渡―→描述事件―→发表看法 2．过渡语句 ①This reminds me of the similar experience. ②This story brings me back to an event many years ago. ③I had a similar experience.
(2017·江苏仪征中学月考)请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇 150 词左右的文章。
The Elephant and the Fly An elephant was standing and picking leaves from a tree.A small fly came， flying and buzzing near his ear.The elephant waved it away with his long ears.Then the fly came again，and the elephant waved it away once more. This was repeated several times.Then the elephant asked the fly，“Why are you so restless and noisy? Why can't you stay for a while in one place？”
③Inspired by what the elephant said，I realized the ability to focus one's attention is the key to success.④Any person, if easily distracted, is unable to achieve his success.
⑤This reminds me of what happened in my primary school.⑥I once signed up for too many various after-class activities.⑦As a result，I didn't spend enough time on my studies.⑧Consequently，I fell behind and failed in exams.
【审题】 本文为寓言性短文，要概括故事的内容，就要读懂故事的寓意。结合题目 要求“就‘专注’这一主题发表你的看法”，从而确定文章写作应围绕“专 注”这一主题。审题时应做到： (1)定时态：本文在概括内容和描述经历时用过去时，在写打算时用将来时； (2)定人称：描述自己的经历用第一人称，他人的经历用第三人称。
A (2017·苏州中学测试)请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇 150 词左 右的文章。 There was once a farmer who had a fine olive orchard (果园)．He was very hardworking，and the farm always prospered (蒸蒸日上)under his care.But he knew that his three sons did not like the farm work, and were eager to reach the goal at a single leap.
【写作内容】 1．以约 30 个单词概括上文的主要内容。 2．以约 120 个单词就“Dig for it，if you wish it.”的话题谈谈你的想法，内 容包括： (1)你对这句话的理解； (2)试举例说明； (3)这个故事给你的启发。
【参考范文】 The story narrates that a dying farmer instructed his three sons to dig for a pot of hidden gold in his orchard，through which they eventually understood their hardworking father's intention. The story sets me thinking we should be dedicated to the goal of life.However， it's not uncommon in our life that there do exist many people who are dying to seek a fortune by virtue of luck rather than through steadfast diligence.Anyway，Rome is not built in one day.
And when they saw how much money had come from the orchard，they suddenly understood what the wise father had meant when he said，“There is gold hidden in the orchard.Dig for it，if you wish it.”
The fly answered，“I am attracted to whatever I see，hear or smell.My senses pull me constantly in all directions and I cannot resist them.What is your secret? How can you stay so calm and still？”
[句式改写] 1.用 only 倒装句改写句②中的宾语从句 The elephant revealed that
. 2.用强调句改写句③ Inspired by what the elephant said，I realized
.
【答案】 1.only when one's senses and attention were focused would calmness be obtained 2.it is the ability to focus one's attention that is the key to success
3．注意事项 (1)注意时态的运用。记述经历类的记叙文，无论写人还是记事，通常以过 去时态为主。如果所写的内容不但有过去的人和事，而且还有现在的人和事， 那么对过去的人和事应采用过去时态，对现在的人和事应采用现在时态。 (2)注意人称的一致性。要根据题目的要求选用合适的人称，做到上下文人 称一致。 (3)篇章结构。通常以时间或事件发展的顺序为线索，有时也可采用倒叙手 法。详写主要情节，略写次要情节。
They dug until they had turned up the soil from one end of the orchard to the other，round the tree roots and between them.But no pot of gold was to be found.It seemed as if someone must have stolen it，or as if the farmer had been wandering in his wits.The three sons were bitterly disappointed to have all their work for nothing.The next olive season，the olive trees in the orchard bore more fruit than they had ever given；when it was sold，it gave the sons a whole pot of gold.
The elephant said，“My senses do not rule my attention.Whatever I do，I get involved in it.Now that I am eating，I am completely absorbed in eating.In this way I can enjoy my food and chew it better.I rule and control my attention.When you are in charge of your senses and attention，your mind will become calm.”
【写作内容】 1．以约 30 个单词概括短文的内容； 2．然后以约 120 个单词就“专注”这一主题发表你的看法，包括以下要点： (1)看完故事后的感受及启发； (2)描述一次你或他人因受太多干扰而使学习、生活或工作受到影响的经历； (3)你打算在高三这一年里如何保持专注。
【写作要求】 1．可以参照阅读材料的内容，但不得直接引用原文中的句子； 2．作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称。 【评分标准】 内容完整，语言规范，语篇连贯，词数适当。
[满分缘由] 1.行文架构 (1)概括短文内容
↓ (2)通过衔接过渡语(Inspired by what the elephant said...)引出主题：专注是 成功的关键
↓ (3)描述经历：自己初中时参加多种课外活动导致考试不及格
↓ (4)打算：在高三阶段如何保持专注
2.亮点词汇 constantly，obtain，focus one's attention，distract，sign up，consequently， give priority to，set a clear goal，achieve one's goal 3.亮点句式 句①含有 who 引导的非限制性定语从句； 句②、句⑤、句⑨含有宾语从句； 句③、句⑩使用了过去分词和现在分词作状语； 句④含有状语从句的省略。
【谋篇】 第一段：概括短文内容。 第二段：衔接过渡语引出主题句。 第三段：描述一次受干扰的范文】 ①An elephant was constantly disturbed by a restless fly，who wondered
about the secret of remaining calm.②The elephant revealed that calmness would be obtained when one's senses and attention were focused.
When the farmer felt that his time had come to die，he called the three sons to him and said，“My sons，there is a pot of gold hidden in the olive orchard.Dig for it， if you wish it.”After the farmer was dead，the sons went to work to find the pot of gold.Since they did not know where the hidingplace was，they agreed to begin in a line，at one end of the orchard，and to dig until one of them should find the money.
出现在读写任务型作文中的记叙文要求学生描述一件与原阅读材料有关联 的事件，并说出自己从事件中得到的启示或对所描述现象发表自己的看法。
1．写作步骤 概括原文―→衔接过渡―→描述事件―→发表看法 2．过渡语句 ①This reminds me of the similar experience. ②This story brings me back to an event many years ago. ③I had a similar experience.
(2017·江苏仪征中学月考)请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇 150 词左右的文章。
The Elephant and the Fly An elephant was standing and picking leaves from a tree.A small fly came， flying and buzzing near his ear.The elephant waved it away with his long ears.Then the fly came again，and the elephant waved it away once more. This was repeated several times.Then the elephant asked the fly，“Why are you so restless and noisy? Why can't you stay for a while in one place？”
③Inspired by what the elephant said，I realized the ability to focus one's attention is the key to success.④Any person, if easily distracted, is unable to achieve his success.
⑤This reminds me of what happened in my primary school.⑥I once signed up for too many various after-class activities.⑦As a result，I didn't spend enough time on my studies.⑧Consequently，I fell behind and failed in exams.
【审题】 本文为寓言性短文，要概括故事的内容，就要读懂故事的寓意。结合题目 要求“就‘专注’这一主题发表你的看法”，从而确定文章写作应围绕“专 注”这一主题。审题时应做到： (1)定时态：本文在概括内容和描述经历时用过去时，在写打算时用将来时； (2)定人称：描述自己的经历用第一人称，他人的经历用第三人称。
A (2017·苏州中学测试)请阅读下面短文，并按照要求用英语写一篇 150 词左 右的文章。 There was once a farmer who had a fine olive orchard (果园)．He was very hardworking，and the farm always prospered (蒸蒸日上)under his care.But he knew that his three sons did not like the farm work, and were eager to reach the goal at a single leap.
【写作内容】 1．以约 30 个单词概括上文的主要内容。 2．以约 120 个单词就“Dig for it，if you wish it.”的话题谈谈你的想法，内 容包括： (1)你对这句话的理解； (2)试举例说明； (3)这个故事给你的启发。
【参考范文】 The story narrates that a dying farmer instructed his three sons to dig for a pot of hidden gold in his orchard，through which they eventually understood their hardworking father's intention. The story sets me thinking we should be dedicated to the goal of life.However， it's not uncommon in our life that there do exist many people who are dying to seek a fortune by virtue of luck rather than through steadfast diligence.Anyway，Rome is not built in one day.
And when they saw how much money had come from the orchard，they suddenly understood what the wise father had meant when he said，“There is gold hidden in the orchard.Dig for it，if you wish it.”
The fly answered，“I am attracted to whatever I see，hear or smell.My senses pull me constantly in all directions and I cannot resist them.What is your secret? How can you stay so calm and still？”