4种不伤人的委婉拒绝方法

4种不伤人的委婉拒绝方法

How many ways are there to say “No” without offending anyone‘s feeling？ Well，there is “No，I can’t”，“No，I don‘t have time” and “No，I don’t want to”。 But the problem is that many of us try to avoid situations that

require us to say “No” to people. In almost every culture

this little word is associated with rejection， failure，egoism and a lack of tact and empathy towards others.

有多少种方法在拒绝时而不得罪人呢？“不行，我没法做。” “不行，我没空。” “不行，我不想做。” 但是问题在于，我们很多人

都想避免对别人说“不”。几乎在每种文化中，“不”这个字都和拒绝、失败、利己主义、应变水平不足、缺少同情心联系起来。

I can not recall how many times I have eaten burnt，undercooked， blandand poorly tasting dishes simply because I did not want to hurt the feelings of the person who had

cooked them. Or the times when I bought something， I did not need， because I felt guilty leaving a shop empty-handed

after spending 20 minutes of the shop assistant‘s time.

我记不起来有多少次，我因为不想伤害做饭的人的感情而吃掉糊了的、夹生的、平淡无味的或味道很差的食物。我也记不起来有多少次我买

了不需要的东西，仅仅因为我觉得花了导购员20分钟的时间两手空空

离开会有一种负罪感。

How do you say “No” without offending anyone or feeling guilty afterwards？ There is a great lesson to be learned

from such approach to communication.

怎样说“不”而不冒犯他人或之后自己没有负罪感？我们能够好好学习一下这种沟通的方法。

If just like me， you sometimes find it difficult to be direct about saying “No”， you can still be assertiveand express you disagreement in a more subtle， yet equally powerful way. The great thing about this method is that it gets your point across without making you look bad，unprofessional， insensitive or uncaring.

如果你和我一样，有时你会发现很难直接说“不”，但是你依然能够自信地用更加微妙、同样有效的方式表达异议。这种方法的精妙之处在于，既能表达你的意思，又不会让人觉得你很差劲、不够职业、不够敏感或漠不关心。

Here are 7 Sneaky Ways to Say “No” without Offending Anyone

下面是4种拒绝而不伤害他人的委婉方法：

1. “This sounds interesting， but I have too much on my plate at the moment.”

“听起来很有趣，但是我现在有太多的事情要做。”

When you start your disagreement with a compliment：“this sounds interesting”， it makes the person less defensive and gives you a validreason to decline “I have too much on my plate at the moment”。

如果你在表达异议时用赞美开头：“听起来很有趣”，会让人的心理防御降低，这时你能够用正当理由来拒绝，如“我现在有太多的事情要做。”

2. “I’m sorry but last time I did ___， I had a negative experience.”

“不好意思，上次我这样做时，我很难受。”

This is a life-saver for me every time I have to explain to people that I do not eat meat. Before I would say that I was

a vegetarian， but for some reason this explanation has never worked on hospitable Italian grandmothers. They would try to feed me bacon， sausage and octopuses （yuck！） explaining

it with “this is not meat” or “I just put a little in this dish”。

当我每次需要向他人解释我不吃肉时，这句话是我的救命稻草。在此

之前，我通常说我是素食主义者，但是不知什么原因，这种解释对好

客的意大利奶奶们一点儿用也没有。她们总是让我吃培根、香肠和章

鱼（真难吃！），并向我解释“这不是肉”或“只放了一点点儿。”

Now I simply say，“I‘m sorry， but I can not eat meat.

Last time I did，I had a terrible headache.” And it works

like a charm， because no one wants to hurt you on purpose.

现在我仅仅说，“不好意思，我不能吃肉。上次我吃肉时，我头疼得

很厉害。” 这非常管用，因为没人想故意伤害你。

The focus here is not on what you want or do not want to do，but on your previous bad experience.

这里要注意的是，关键不在于你想要什么或不想做什么，关键在于上

次你这样做很难受。

3. “I’d love to do this， but ____”

“我想这么做，但是____”。