英语作文——范文评析on excessive packaging

题目：On Excessive Packaging

提纲：1. 目前很多商品存在过度包装现象

2. 出现这一现象的原因

3. 我对这一现象的看法和建议

Model 1

On Excessive Packaging

Nowadays the phenomena of excessive packaging of goods are prevailing普遍的，流行的in our society: clothes swathed in tissue paper, placed in cardboard box and finally wrapped in well-designed plastic bags, imported bottles of grape wine packed in wooden boxes, fruits put in hand-woven baskets, to name but a few.（第一段用模版句型the phenomena of …..are ..导出，后面用几个精彩的排比句说明）

There are several causes of excessive packaging. The first reason is that a large number of companies believe that they can attract customers’ attention and stimulate their purchasing desire by over-packaging their goods, thus gaining more profits. On the other hand, quite a number of consumers mistakenly hold that the more delicate the package is, the better the quality will be, thus encouraging excessive packaging.（第二段用模版句型there are several causes of…展开第二段对原因的分析，接着用2个层次具体分析原因，分别是the first reason is that….和on the other hand……,这一段最精彩的是作者对形容词，动词的选择丰富，比如attract, stimulate , gain, encourage 等）

In my point of view, excessive packaging has disastrous consequences, including the loss of precious resources, excessive consumption of water and energy, and unnecessary extraction of scarce land for landfill.（此段谈我的看法，亮点是作者很好运用了名词短语的排比，使语

句充满节奏感，不呆板，充分显示了作者对名词的驾驭能力，比如the loss of , consumption of ,extraction of ）

To solve the proble m, it’s necessary to take the following measures. First, laws and regulations must be made to restrict excessive packaging of companies. In addition, we need to raise consumer’s awareness that excessive packaging doesn’t equal to high quality and advocate packaging recycling. (最后段谈如何解决问题，作者也用到了亮点表达restrict,ｒａｉｓｅａｗａｒｅｎｅｓｓｏｆ，ｅｑｕａｌｔｏ等等)

Moedel 2

I assume that you are familiar with the phenomenon of “Excessive Packaging”.Taking a look around, we can find examples with ease: a small computer is packed in a thick and heavy carton, clothes are putted in a well-designed plastic bags and moon-cakes are usually placed in delicate boxes.(个性化的开头，生动不说教)

What are the causes of this problem? On the one hand, to earn more economic gains, a considerable number of manufactures usually wrap their products with unnecessary but appealing materials aiming at attracting customer’s attention, arousing their curiosity and then stimulating their purchasing desire. On the other land quite a few customers believe that the more delicate the package seems, the superior the quality will be, the notion has also encourage the treｎd of excessive packaging.（用问句的方法开头，What are the causes of this problem?衔接自然，引入本段对原因的讨论，此段通过on the one hand,和on the other hand展开，并显示了作者词汇的丰富和多样性）

To change this situation, I think we should take the following measures. First, laws must be made and implemented to impose restriction on excessive packaging. Moreover, a public education campaign should be launched to arouse customers’consciousness that packaging doesn’t equal to quality. Only in this way can e put an end to this trend.（提出建议，从２方面