爆笑的经典英语小笑话

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英语笑话大全笑你的肚子

英语笑话大全笑你的肚子英语笑话大全笑你的肚子笑话来源于生活，却又可以让我们的生多些欢乐、开心，现在，一起来开心爆笑下。

英语笑话大全笑你的肚子【1】1、Would you like to be the sun in my life?A: Would you like to be the sun in my life?你想成为我生命中的太阳吗?B: Aww, Yes!哇哦!当然想。

A: Very well, then. Stay XX miles away from me.很好，那么赶紧到距离我XX里远的地方吧。

2、How much do you love me?A: How much do you love me?你有多么喜欢我?B: As many as the stars in the sky.和天上的星星一样多。

A: Good! ... Wait! It’s daytime now...太好了...等等，现在是白天啊!B: T here’s no stars in the sky in the daytime.没错，白天的天空上没有星星。

英语笑话大全笑你的肚子【2】1 Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday? I gave it to a poor old woman, he answered. You’re a good boy, said the mother proudly. Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman? She is the one who sells the candy.好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

【英语小笑话带翻译】 20个英语笑话爆笑超短

【英语小笑话带翻译】20个英语笑话爆笑超短笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。

笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。

小编精心收集了英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!英语小笑话带翻译篇1Ivancamehomewithabloodynose伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

andhismotherasked,"Whathappened?"他妈妈问，“发生了什么事?”"Akidbitme,"repliedIvan.“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。

"Wouldyourecognizehimifyousawhimagain?"askedhismother.“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。

"I'dknowhimanywhere,"saidIvan.“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。

"Ihavehisearinmypocket."“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。

”英语小笑话带翻译篇2Theschoolgirlwassittingwithherfeetstrechedfaroutintothe aisle,个女学生坐在座位上，脚却伸到课桌间的走道里andwasbusilychewinggum,嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖，whentheteacherespiedher.被老师发现了"Mary!"calledtheteachersharply.“玛丽!”老师严厉地叫她。

"Yes,Madam?"questionedthepupil,“什么事，老师?”这女学生问。

"Takethatgumoutofyourmouthandputyourfeetin!"“把口香糖从嘴里拿出来，把脚放进去。

”英语小笑话带翻译篇3Amanwalksintoabarandordersabeer.一男子去酒吧，点了一杯啤酒。

英语爆笑笑话大全超级搞笑的

英语爆笑笑话大全超级搞笑的英语笑话一：What do I get? 我能得到什么?Teacher: If I cut a beefsteak in half and then cut the half in half, what do I get?老师：如果我把一块牛排切成两半的两半，我能得到几块儿?Tommy: Quarters.汤米：四块。

Teacher: And then if I cut it twice again?老师：那我要是再切两次，我能得到什么呢?Tommy: Hamburger.汤米：汉堡。

英语笑话二：我知道你会帮我 I know I could count on youSmith goes to see his boss in the front office. "Boss," he says: "we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic阁楼 and the garage.""We're short-handed, Smith." the boss replies. "I can't give you the day off.""Thanks, boss," says Smith, "I know I could count on you!"史密斯去找他的老板。

“老板，我们家明天有很重的工作要做，我妻子让我修阁楼和车库。

”“可我们很缺人，史密斯。

”老板答道，“我不可能放你的假。

”“谢谢，老板。

”史密斯说，“我就知道你会帮我。

”《律师、宝马和胳膊》A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along andhit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterlyabout the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"一个律师打开他的宝马车门，突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了，警察赶到现场，律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

爆笑英语冷笑话10篇

爆笑英语冷笑话10篇下面是学习啦我整理的爆笑英语冷笑话，欢迎大家阅读!爆笑英语冷笑话：Whose father was the strongerWill and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger.Will said, Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My fathers the one who dug the hole for it.Bill wasnt impressed, Well, thats nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My fathers the one who killed it!维尔和比尔在争吵，谁的爸爸是更强壮的一个。

维尔说："你知道太平洋吗?那个坑是我爸爸挖的。

'比尔不屑地说："那没什么。

你知道死海吗? 那是我爸爸打死的。

'爆笑英语冷笑话：Persistance 缠住不放Returning from a golf outing(远足，短途旅行) , my husband was greeted at the door by Sara, our four-year-old daughter. Daddy, who won the golf game? You or Uncle Richie?Uncle Richie and I dont play golf to win, my husband hedged(避开作正面答复) . We just play to have fun.Undaunted, Sare said, Okay, Daddy, who had more fun?丈夫打完〔高尔夫球〕回来，我们四岁的女儿莎拉在门口迎了上去。

爸爸，谁赢了高尔夫球竞赛，是你还是理查叔叔?我和理查叔叔打高尔夫球不是为赢，丈夫推诿说。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]

1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don"t bird me,i don"t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed i will give you some color to see see,pothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．you give me stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知...9．watch sister表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse" son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子大地洞11．american chinese not enough美中不足12．one car e one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：i am sorry!老外：i am sorry too!小明：i am sorry three!老外：what are you sorry for?小明：i am sorry five!16．if you want money,i have no;if you want life,i have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．i call li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读

英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感，而感到好笑。

下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。

In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上，老师问杰克：“请回答，世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答：“是手风琴。

”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问：“为什么是手风琴呢，英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说：“老师，您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上，汤姆的老师问同学们：“当打雷的时候，为什么我们先看到闪电，然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。

英语爆笑小笑话12篇

英语爆笑小笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑小笑话，希望大家会喜欢!英语爆笑小笑话：智力缺陷"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied, "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "Well, what sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' " Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."“医生，你能不能告诉我，”鲍勃问，“对于一个看上去很正常的人，你是怎样判断出他有智力缺陷的呢?”“再没有比这容易的了，”医生回答，“问他一个简单的问题，简单到所有人都知道答案，如果他回答得不干脆，那你就知道是怎么回事了。

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇，欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一：Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。

The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。

过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。

The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。

你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上，先生。

”那小男孩说。

英语爆笑笑话二：太黑了，看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。

英语小笑话爆笑带翻译

英语小笑话爆笑带翻译英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译（精选8篇）笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。

笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。

店铺精心收集了英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译（精选8篇），供大家欣赏学习!英语小笑话爆笑带翻译篇1While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(烦躁，发牢骚) andjabbering(快而含糊地说) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.The man's wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."有个人生病了。

他的妻子请了一位医生来给他治病。

医生在给他治疗的时候，他的妻子一直大惊小怪，神神叨叨地紧张不安。

医生对她说：“你的丈夫必须绝对休息和保持安静。

” 然后他就留下了一些安眠药。

她问医生：“什么时候给我丈夫吃这些药呀!”医生回答说：“不用，这些药不是给他吃的，是给你吃的，你需要。

”英语小笑话爆笑带翻译篇2She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."有个女人给她的丈夫买了生日礼物。

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话（优秀10篇）英国人有他们独特的英式幽默，他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑，今天，小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话，希望大家能开心开心，一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样？”“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

十个英语笑话爆笑超短

十个英语笑话爆笑超短1、What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home2、"What is the thinnest book in the world? ""What men know about women."""3、"苦命的salesman An insect repellent salesman tried to sell his product to a farmer. He said he wasn""t interested because he hadn""t seen any bugs or insects on his farm for years. The salesman indicated he had a wife and four kids and really needed the money. The......"4、"运动世家A German, Englishman and American are traveling ona train. They get bored and start telling each other about their families. The German says I have 4 kids, one more and they""ll make a basketball team. The Englishman says huh!Thats nothing, I have 10 boys,&nbs......"5、"FLOWERS It means that... You love the beauty of nature, the scent of flowers and appreciate this timeless romantic gesture. OR You get some twisted joy out of watching vegetation wither and die."6、"Revealing Gift Test Which gift would you like? To determine your personality, pick the gift you""d most like to receive."7、"A SWEET POEM It means that... You""re a hopeless romantic, a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the writtenword. OR You""re used to cheap gifts and like to pass yourself off as a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the w......"8、"A married couple on the farm are visited by an alien couple. The alien couple asked the human couple if they would like to swap partners for sex.They agree, the human woman and alien man are together. She says, ""You have a small penis!""The alien man replies, ""pull my ears!""......A man enters a barber shop for a shave.While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problem he has getting a close shave around his cheeks.""I have just the thing,"" says the barber, taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. ""Just place this between your cheek and gum.""......"9、"A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. ""Screw me or climb the ladder to success,"" she said......."10、"同学是某偏远地区的，英语发音一直不标准，老师英文也是发不准，所以学生更是一口地道的土腔英语。

超爆笑的英语笑话(优秀7篇)

超爆笑的英语笑话（优秀7篇）英语小笑话爆笑带翻译篇一To Buy a Video 买录像机Amos asked his mother whether they could have a video.I’m afraid we can’t afford one, sighed his mother.But on the following day in came Amos, staggering beneath the weight of a brand-new video.How on earth did you pay for that? gasped his mother.Easy, Mum. replied Amos, I sold the television!艾莫斯问妈妈他们是否能买一台录像机。

恐怕我们还买不起，妈妈叹息着说。

可第二天当艾莫斯回来时，他摇摇晃晃地搬着一台全新的录像机。

你究竟是哪儿来的钱买这东西？妈妈大吃一惊，喘着气说。

妈妈，这简单，艾曼斯回答。

我把电视机给卖了！爆笑英语笑话篇二Reasons理由One early morning a mother went to her sleeping son and woke him up.一天清晨，妈妈去叫还在睡觉的儿子起床。

Wake up, son.起来，儿子。

It#39;s time to go to school.去学校的时间到了。

But why? I don#39;t want to go to school.但是为什么？我不想去学校。

Give me two reasons why you don#39;t want to go to school.给我两个理由，你为什么不想去学校。

One, all the children hate me.第一，所有的孩子都恨我。

Two, all the teachers hate me.第二，所有的老师都恨我。

英语爆笑笑话9篇

英语爆笑笑话9篇下面是学习啦我整理的英语爆笑笑话，希望对大家有关怀。

英语爆笑笑话：Have a neuropathy, I do not know where to get a handful of pistols, he is gone in a little black alley. When suddenly a young man, neuropathy apart from anything else its guns on the ground by pointing to his head. Asked one plus a few zero. Terrified young people, thought for a long time. Answer, equals two. Neuropathy of the killing he did not hesitate. And then get pulled in his arms, said a cold, you know too much ...有一个神经病，不知道从哪里弄来了一把手枪，他走在一条小黑胡同里。

突然遇上一个年轻人，神经病二话不说将其按在地上用枪指着他的头。

问道，一加一得几。

年轻人吓坏了，深思了很久。

回答，等于二。

神经病毫不迟疑的打死了他。

然后把抢拽在怀里，冰冷的说了一句，你知道的太多了英语爆笑笑话：Boy: Hi, didnt we go on dates before? Onec or twice?Girl: Mustve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.男孩：嗨，我们之前是不是约会过，是一次还是两次，我遗忘了。

女孩：应当只有一次吧，我从不犯两次同样的错误。

英语爆笑笑话：HospitalityThe hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guests plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese? In the rat-trap, sir, replied the boy.好客由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。

最搞笑的英语小笑话十则

三一文库（）〔最搞笑的英语小笑话十则〕*篇一：爆笑的经典英语小笑话英语笑话（一）老师在黑板上写了一句：Timeismoney.并让同学们翻译。

有名学生答道：“汤姆是玛丽。

”小明上英文课时跟老师说：MayIgotothetoilet?老师说：Goahead.小明就坐了下来。

过了一会儿，小明又跟老师说：MayIgotothetoilet?老师说：Goahead.小明又坐了下来。

他旁边的同学于是忍不住问：你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗？怎么不去？小明说：你没听老师说「去你个头」啊！英语笑话（二）某日刘洪涛遇到外宾，上前搭话曰：Iamhongtaoliu，外宾曰：我TM还是方片七呢！英语笑话（三）江青会见外宾，要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻，不许走样。

外宾一见到江青，立刻拍马屁道："MissJiang,youareverybeautiful."翻译照翻，江青心花怒放，嘴上还要谦虚一下：“哪里，哪里”。

翻译不敢怠慢，把江青的话翻成英文："Where?Where?"外宾一愣，还有这样的人，追问哪里漂亮的，干脆马屁拍到底："Everywhere,everywhere."翻译：“你到处都很漂亮。

”江青更高兴了，但总是要客气一下：“不见得，不见得”。

翻译赶紧翻成英文："Youarenotallowedtosee,youarenotallowedtosee."英语笑话（四）话说某年某月的某一天，叁个神箭手约在一起比箭，目标是十尺外仆人头上的苹果。

A神箭手挽弓长射，咻一声，利箭正中苹果。

A高傲的昂起下巴，比出一根大拇指道：「IAM 后羿！」B神箭手照本宣科，射中苹果，这回他自大的喊了一句：「IAM丘比特！」轮到C了，他也挽弓，利箭射出！结果正中仆人的心脏。

就听他结结巴巴好久才吐出一句：「I...I...I...AM...SORRY...」英语笑话（五）某人刻苦学习英语，终有小成。

英语笑话简单易懂爆笑

英语笑话简单易懂爆笑1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. 老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。

One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。

Teacher: who just threw that?老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了？Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩：我!我现在要回家了。

2、What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高？Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来。

3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体？A coin!硬币。

4、What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛，却看不见？A needle.针。

5、Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子：你会怎么形容我呢？Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫：ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子：那是什么意思？Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."丈夫：迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。

Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子：哇，谢谢，但是“IJK”是什么意思呢？Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫：开个玩笑！。

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。

下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一：我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说：“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。

我妻子是财政部长。

我岳母是作战部长，我女儿是外交秘书。

”“听上去挺有意思的，”他的同事说，“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。

我要做的一切就是付钱。

”英语笑话二：喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭，父亲把服务生叫了过来。

英语搞笑冷笑话12篇

英语搞笑冷笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑冷笑话，希望大家会喜欢!英语搞笑冷笑：交通事故A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign (i)his car broadside, and knocked him cold. Passerbys pulled him from the wreck and revived him. He began a terrific struggle and had to be tranquilized by the medics. Later, when he was calm, they asked him why he struggled so. He said, "I remember the impact, then nothing. I woke up on a concrete slab in front of a huge, flashing 'Shell' sign. And somebody was standing in front of the 'S.'有个人开车行驶在上班的路上，一辆卡车闯红灯从侧面撞上了他的车，当时他就不省人事了。

路旁的行人把他从车里拉出来并唤醒他。

刚一醒过来，他就拼命的挣扎着，最后不得不用了药物才让他镇静下来。

过了一会儿，他平静了，别人问他为什么要这么恐怖的挣扎，他说：“被撞之后我就什么都不知道了，当我醒过来，我发现我躺在了路边，前面是一个巨大的广告牌上面闪烁着‘壳牌’，但是有个人挡住了那个“S”。

”英语搞笑冷笑话：写给上帝的信A little boy needed $50 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $50. When the post office received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the president. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the boy a $5 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read: Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington,D.C., and, as usual, those turkeys kept $45 in taxes.有个小男孩非常需要50美元，他为此祷告了数周但是什么也没发生。

英语经典爆笑笑话12篇

英语经典爆笑笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语经典爆笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语经典爆笑笑话：Keep feeding him nickelsA mother saw her three-year-old son put nickel in his mouth and swallowed it. She immediately picked hime up, turned him upside down and hit him on the back, whereupon he coughed up two dimes. Frantically, she called to the father outside. "Your son just swallowed a nickel and coughed up two dimes!What shall I do? "Yelled back the father,"Keep feeding him nickels!"母亲见三岁的儿子将一枚五分镍币放进嘴里吞了下去，她立刻将他抱起，头朝下不停地拍打他的后背，他咳出了两枚一角的硬币，她发狂似的朝正在外面的孩子父亲喊道：“你儿子刚才吞下了一枚五分镍币，可咳出两枚一角的硬币!我该怎么办呢?”孩子他爸大声回答道：“再喂他几枚镍币!”英语经典爆笑笑话：Dumas仲马One day a man was taunting Alexandre Dumas，the greatFrench novelist，with his ancestry. “Why，” snarled the fellow，“you are a quadroon;yourfather was a mulatto，and your grandfather was a negro.” “Yes，” roared Dumas，“and，if you wish to know'mygreatgrandfather was a monkey. In fact，my pedigree beganwhere yours terminates.”有一天，一个人在嘲弄法国大小说家亚历山大·仲马，讥笑他的祖先。

英语经典爆笑笑话9篇

英语经典爆笑笑话9篇下面是店铺整理的英语经典爆笑笑话，希望对大家有帮助。

英语经典爆笑笑话：Two Pieces of CakeTom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!两块蛋糕汤姆：妈妈，我可以吃两块蛋糕吗?妈妈：当然可以----拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧!英语经典爆笑笑话：Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings."Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!""Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。

“看，”哥哥说，“这些画多漂亮呀!”“是啊，”弟弟说道，“可是在所有这些画中，只有妈妈和孩子。

那爸爸去哪儿了呢?”哥哥想了一会儿，然后解释道：“很明显，他当时正在画这些画呗。

”英语经典爆笑笑话：It's not my faultMother (reprimanding训斥，谴责her small daughter): You mustn't pull the cat's tail.Daughter: I'm only holding it, Mom. The cat's doing the pulling.不是我的错妈妈(正教训她的女儿)：你不该拽猫的尾巴。