英语搞笑话剧剧本(四人)

甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank you....Recently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famous actress---Anne Hathaway,OK, let's begin. At first , talent show, number one, let's welcome.

乙:(风情万种,妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞

吻):oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right Yeah, I'm Nicole Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打

个响指) come some music.(搞笑舞,自由发挥). (跳完,鞠躬,向观

众谢幕), thank you,(面向导演), honey, is it a wonderful performance

甲:(作目瞪口呆状),

乙:(在甲眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok

甲:eh...my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.

乙:oh no ...sweet ,you break my heart...(掩面离去)

丙:oh it seems to be serious. God bless me(画个十字架,镇定地走到甲面前,伸出手), nice to meet you, director.

甲:(与之握手),nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please.

丙:I'm Celine Dion, you know, I don't have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and(做沉思状) oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, (同学鼓掌,乙作安抚状),oh, calm down, calm down,it's just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I....

甲:ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin

丙:OK!!! I'll use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.

near, far, wherever you are

i believe that the heart does go on

once more, you opened the door(甲stop stop,丙不理,继续作深情状)

and you're here in my heart,

and my heart will go on and on.

甲:guard ,guard,help,drag this mad woman out.

Oh, I'm dying,hope the next one will give me a surprise

丁:(对着乙的背影,沉思状)to be,or not to be,it's a

question!(走到甲面前牵起她的手做亲吻状),I'm glad to see you,my dear princess.

甲(做娇羞状):oh, it's really a big surprise,so what's your name

丁:My name Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan(甲,白痴的摇头),eh..,it's ok,then how about Robin Meade(摇头),and Melissa Theuriau(摇头),(丁,情绪激动),you know nothing, how can you sit in here.

甲(指门,气愤状),you you you.....

丁:ok ok, it doesn't matter, you needn't learn about them, but you must know me, the most famous hostess who will catch up with those person and become the greatest poet---oprah!

甲:I don't care who you are, just show me your talent.

丁:ok ,listen,one poem,I have had found my best love, but I didn’t treasure her. When I lost her, I regret. It’s the most pain in the world. If God can give me another chance, I will say there words to her “I love you”!

甲(起鸡皮疙瘩状):oh, I can't stand, show you the door,

丁(转身离开,继续台词):If there is a time limit, I hope, it is (回头,对甲)10 thousand years.