英语幽默小故事6篇

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英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。

学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。

“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。

”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。

”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。

英语幽默小故事14篇

英语幽默小故事14篇
英语幽默小故事 篇3
Gardening Gloves For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an
allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you‘ll notice that my hands are bare." Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair of gardening gloves. 园艺手套 几个月以来,我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指,因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天,我正在 干园艺活时,丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说:“嗯,你肯定看到了,我的两手都是光光的。” 那天晚上,我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的.礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看:里面包着一双园艺手套。
英语幽默小故事 篇8
Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for seve Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wound Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."

英语故事短文【六篇】

英语故事短文【六篇】

【导语】有趣⽽幽默的故事总是能吸引⼈的注意⼒,唤起⼈们的学习兴趣,兴趣是学习得以真正发⽣的基本条件,故事集知识性、趣味性、⽂化性和思想性于⼀体,所以通过读故事也可以达到学习的⽬的。

®⽆忧考⽹为⼤家准备了《英语故事短⽂【六篇】》,供⼤家参考阅读。

【篇⼀】英语故事短⽂:⽼⿏和公⽜ A mouse once took a bite out of a bull's tail as he lay dozing. The bull jumped up in a rage and, with his head low to the ground, chased the mouse right across the yard. The mouse was too quick for him, however, and slipped easily into a hole in the wall. The bull charged the wall furiously again and again, but although he bruised his head and chipped his horns, the mouse stayed safely inside his hole. After a time the bull gave up and sank down to rest again. As soon as the bull was asleep, the little mouse crept to the mouth of the hole, pattered across the yard, bit the bull again -- this time on the nose -- and rushed back to safety. As the bull roared helplessly the mouse squeaked: "It's not always the big people who come off best. Sometimes the small ones win, you know."【篇⼆】英语故事短⽂:Change Name Tom is 16. he decides to leave home and joins a music company. His father hears that and angry, “Singer? My son? It’s disgrace!” he shouts, “What do they think of the neighbors know?” “I will change my name,” Tom says. He thinks he will become a singer in the future. “Change your name?” Tom’s father shouts angrily, “What if you’re successful? How will the neighbors know you are my son.?”【篇三】英语故事短⽂:Wolf Is Coming There is a naughty boy in a village. He likes telling lies. One day he wants to make fun of the farmers. So he shouts,“Wolf! Wolf! Wolf is coming!” The kind farmers are working in the field. They hear the shout, and hurry to help the boy. But when get there, the boy says: “There isn’t a wolf. I’m joking. The farers are angry and go back to their field. After a while the biy shouts again, “Wolf! Wolf! Wolf is coming!” And the farmers come and are cheated again. The boy laughs and laughs. They say, “You tell lies. We will not believe you.” Later a wolf really comes. The boy is very scared. “Wolf! Wolf! Wolf is coming!” the boy shouts and shouts. “Help! Help!”But no one comes. And wolf eats the naughty boy.【篇四】英语故事短⽂:The Miser A MISER sold all that he had and bought a lump of gold, which he buried in a hole in the ground by the side of an old wall and went to look at daily. One of his workmen observed his frequent visits to the spot and decided to watch his movements. He soon discovered the secret of the hidden treasure, and digging down, came to the lump of gold, and stole it. The Miser, on his next visit, found the hole empty and began to tear his hair and to make loud lamentations. A neighbor, seeing him overcome with grief and learning the cause, said, "Pray do not grieve so; but go and take a stone, and place it in the hole, and fancy that the gold is still lying there. It will do you quite the same service; for when the gold was there, you had it not, as you did not make the slightest use of it."【篇五】英语故事短⽂:The House of 1000 Mirrors Long ago in a small, faraway village, there was a place known as the House of 1000 Mirrors. A small, happy little dog learned of this place and decided to visit. When he arrived, he hounced happily up the stairs to the doorway of the house. He looked through the doorway with his ears lifted high and his tail wagging as fast as it could. To his great surprise, he found himself staring at 1000 other happy little dogs with their tails wagging just as fast as his. He smiled a great smile, and was answered with 1000 great smiles just as warm and firendly. As he left the House, he thought to himself, "This is a wonderful place. I will come back and visit it often." In this same village, another little dog, who was not quite as happy as the first one, decided to visit the house. He slowly climbed the stairs and hung his head low as he looked into the door. When he saw the 1000 unfriendly looking dogs staring back at him, he growled at them and was horrified to see 1000 little dogs growling back at him. As he left, he thought to himself, "That is a horrible place, and I will never go back there again." All the faces in the world are mirrors. What kind of reflections do you see in the faces of the people you meet?【篇六】英语故事短⽂:The mouse A philosophical mouse spoke loudly in praise of nature’s goodness for having made the mice such particular objects of her concern and protection. “For,” she said, “one half of us is provided by her with wings, so that if all here below were killed by cats, she could easily restore our extinguished race by means of the bats.” The good little mouse didn’t know that there were also flying cats and thus does our pride chiefly rest on ignorance.。

英语小故事5分钟幽默

英语小故事5分钟幽默

英语小故事5分钟幽默爱听故事、爱看故事书,是现在小学生最明显的特点。

孩子们通过阅读来获取知识。

店铺整理了5分钟幽默英语小故事,欢迎阅读!5分钟幽默英语小故事篇一A foreign visitor touring the great American West came across an Indian with his ear pressed to the ground.一位外国游客到美国大西部游览,碰到一个印第安人把耳朵紧贴在地上。

"What are you listening for?" he asked."你在听什么呢?"他询问道。

"Stagecoach pass about half hour ago.“一辆马车半小时前曾经过这里。

”"How can you tell?"“你怎么知道呢?'’"Broke my neck. "“我的脖子被撞断了。

”5分钟幽默英语小故事篇二A politician was out on the Indian reservation displaying his sympathy for the oppressed Native Americans. He addressed a gathering of the people.一位政客抵达一处印第安人居留地向居住在该区被压迫的原住民表达他的关切之情。

他向一群民众发表演说。

The plight of your tribe has always been close to my heart," said the politician.“我一直切身体会到你们的穷苦困境,”政客说。

"Umgwalagwala , "responded the audience enthusiastically.“安瓜拉瓜拉!”群众热烈欢呼。

一分钟英文幽默小故事(共8篇)

一分钟英文幽默小故事(共8篇)

一分钟英文幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:一分钟英文幽默小故事 A hungry Fox found in a hollow tree a quantity of bread and meat, which some shepherds had placed there against their return.Delighted with his find he slipped in through the narrow aperture and greedily devoured it all.But when he tried to get out again he foundhimself so swollen after his big meal that he could not squeeze through the hole, and fell to whining and groaning over his misfortune.一分钟英文幽默小故事2:The Beauty of a ShabbyLittle DandelionSpring has e for the flowers and trees, in the forest and fields. Spring has also e on the wild flowers under the fence and on a small apple tree. There were red bursting flower buds hanging on the fresh apple tree branches.The apple Tree Branch held up his head and looked at many kinds of people who came in and out. They allshowed different reactions to the Apple Tree Branch.All the people reacted differently when they saw the Apple Tree branch. Some were expressionless without a word, some overpraised the beauty of the Apple Tree Branch, and others gazed at him with a satisfied look.Seeing these various reactions from people, the Apple Tree Branch realized that people have as diverse personalities as plants and flowers do and that they are all different. The Apple Tree branch looked at the fields and a garden through the open window. There were shabby flowers and plants as well as beautiful ones in the garden.'Those grasses are so pathetic. It's not theirfault they have such ugly and squalid names. However, everything is different in this world.' The apple Tree Branch sympathized and looked at the little flowers blooming next to the fields and streams.At that time, the Sun kissed the Apple Tree Branch, a dandelion in the field, the abundant beautiful flowers, and the shabby fl owers and said, “Yes, there is difference among everything, but throw away yourprejudice and look ahead with a broad point of view. What do you think the poorest plant is?” “A Dandelion. People do not use it even for a bouquet, and it is so mon that people trle it down carelessly. It is not different from a weed at all.”At that time, children ran across the field,rolled about on the lawn, and picked and kissed the dandelions. They made necklaces and garlands of them. They looked wonderful with the golden flowers and green stems.The seeds stuck to the stalks of the dandelions, and they were as beautiful as white feathers. When the children blew out with a puff, the seeds of the dandelions fluttered away as if they had wings.“Look at that! Now, do you und erstand how beautiful those flowers are, and how much pleasure they can give us?” The Sun said to the Apple Tree Branch. “They are only for children.” The Apple Tree Branch answered.At that time, an old lady dug in the ground of the field and picked the roots of the dandelions. She willmake tea, take it to the doctor who makes medicine,and earn money with the roots of the dandelions.“But, beauty is more valuable than those things. Only elected ones can join the Kingdom of Beauty. Not every plant can be the same, just as people can't be the same.” The Apple Tree Branch said.Later some people came into the room. The Countess who brought the Apple Tree Branch to the castle wasone of them. She brought a stalk of dandelion seeds much more carefully than when she brought the Apple Tree Branch.“Look at this. Isn't this beautiful? I will drawa picture of this dandelion with the apple tree branch. Everyone says that the apple tree branch is more beautiful, but this humble dandelion has a different kind of beauty. Even though the apple tree branch and the dandelion look different from each other, they are all beautiful.” The Countess said filled with admiration.The Sun smiled and kissed the shabby dandelion and the Apple Tree Branch. The Apple Tree Branch blushed his own petals with shame.篇2:一分钟英文幽默小故事 A long time ago, there lived a terrible king. The terrible king's wish was that all the people would shake in fear at the sound of his name. The terrible king made the lives of the people in the neighbor land ho rrible. “Here! Take everything!”The terrible king viciously took away all the belongings of the neighbor land. He even scared the poor women and children. The king was not even sorry to the children and women. The terrible king bothered the people of the neighbor land worse and worse everyday. The palace became more and more magnificent.“Put up a statue in the church!” Now theterrible king was ordering the church to place a statue of himself there. However, the ministers could not do that.“ Your majesty may be great, but God is even greater.”The terrible king was being angry. It was because he thought that he was the greatest in the whole world. Then the king was angry. “What! He is greater? Then I will defeat God.”In a loud voice, the terrible king said that he would win against God. That's why he ordered that a magnificent ship be built in order to go to the heaven. He said he would ride the ship to go and defeat God. The terrible king rode the ship up to heaven.From the sky, an angel was sent. However, the terrible king shot over a thousand bullets at the angel. “Ahhhhhh” Being shot, the angel was bleeding. The blood dropped unto the terrible king's ship. The angel's blood was so heavy that the king's ship sank.The terrible king became angry, again. “Build a more stronger ship.” The terrible king wanted abetter ship, so he ordered all the workers in his kingdom to build it. “I will defeat God for sure!”The terrible king went up to heaven, once more. God sent mosquitoes to the terrible king. The terribleking just laughed at the mosquitoes. “Go and bring me the best carpet.”The king made another mand. He thought that if he wrapped the carpet around his body the mosquitoes would not be able to bite him. But one mosquito went inside of the carpet. Because of that one mosquito, the terrible king was rolling around screaming. The terrible king that couldn't even catch one mosquito was a laughingstock for his troops.The Terrible King篇3:一分钟英语幽默小故事 Many ages had now passed away since the Phoenix had been seen in the world. At last he again appeared. Immediately al the different kinds of animals, both birds and beasts, flocked around him.篇4:一分钟英语幽默小故事 Christmas was ing .Mr Smith had no money to buy any presents for hischildren .His wife was ill and he spent a lot of money on her medicine .And the harvest was bad and all his family were going go be hungry the next spring .He was quite worried about it .“We had only a cock ,”said Mrs Smith oneday .“You’d better take it to the town .Sell it there and buy some cakes and sweets for ourchildren .”“It’s a good idea !”the man said and caught the cock the next morning and put it into a box .It was difficult to walk on the road covered with thicksnow .Two hours later he was very tied and wanted to have a rest .He put the box to the ground and sat down .“The air in the box must be close ,”the man said to himself .“I’d better let the cock walk outside for a while ,or it’ll die .”So he put the cock to the ground .When he started again ,he couldn’t catch it any lo nger .“How foolish you are !”Mr Smith called out angrily .“You can herald the break of day at night but you cann’t find the way to the town in the daytime !”篇6:英文短篇幽默小故事精选 Once there were lots of toys in a room. There was a saving box on thedresser, and it was a small piggy bank. The piggy bank was full of bronze, gold and silver coins.One night, the beautiful moonlight poured into the room through a window. The toys in the room were so happy. “Ladies and gentlemen, let's play together on this beautifu l night.” A baby doll with a red velvet ribbon said. “Okay. Let's play a game.” “After that, let's have a tea party.” “Wow, it will beexciting!” All the toys shouted for joy.“Hey, piggy bank! e on and join us. Let's enjoy the party.” “e on.” Everyone inv ited him to the party, but the piggy bank ignored their invitation. Therefore, the other toys enjoyed their party without the piggy bank.A rocking horse put on a knitting ball tail and danced. A rubber ball rolled over, and a toy car drove round everywhere in the room. Everyone seemed so happy.The piggy bank looked down at them playing and watched with an askance look. Then, the playing was over and the tea party began. The piggy bank couldn'tstand not eating when he saw the food, and he came closer step by step to the edge of the dresser.He smelled delicious cookies. He suddenly stuckhis head towards the toys gathered.“Clink!” The piggy bank fell down to the floor. When the piggy bank broke into pieces, the bronze, gold and silver coins inside of him scattered noisily.The other toys were surprised at the piggy bank's fall while they were enjoying the tea party. Everybody looked at the piggy bank with surprise. “Look at that poor piggy bank. He was always proud of himself.”“It's so sad. He could not even enjoy the party.”All the other toys felt sorry about the piggy bank.篇7:英文幽默哲理小故事英文幽默哲理小故事1、如今我要表现得像一位女士One day womens dresses were on sale at a department store. A dignified middle-aged man decided to pick a dress for his wife, but soon he found himself being battered by frantic women.一天,一家百货公司的女装大减价,一位高贵的中年男士想给他的太太挑选一件女装。

幽默英语小故事

幽默英语小故事

幽默英语小故事幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读幽默简单英语小故事搞笑阅读幽默简单英语小故事篇 1 “Gerald,“ asked the teacher, "what is the shape of the earth" “Gerald,”老师问道,“地球的形状是什么样的” "It"s round," answered Gerald. “是圆的”,Gerald答道。

"How do you know it"s round" continued the teacher. “你怎么知道它是圆的呢”老师继续追问。

"All right, it"s square then," he replied, "I really don"t feel like getting into an argument about it!" “好吧,那就是方的,”他答道,“我真不想为此和您争论!” 幽默简单英语小故事篇2 There was a farmer who fell and broke his hip while he was plowing, and his horse immediately galloped five miles to the nearest town and returned, carrying a doctor on his back. 有一个农夫在耕地的时候从马背上摔下来,摔坏了他的臀部,于是他的马立刻疾奔了五里路,驼回了一名医生。

"That"s a pretty smart horse," the farmer"s friend later observed. “真是一匹聪明的马,”后来农夫的朋友评论道。

"Well, he"s not really so smart," the farmer said. "The doctor he brought back was a veterinarian!" “哦,他其实并没有这么聪明,”农夫说。

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的

幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。

幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是店铺整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。

幽默英语小故事1.Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.慎重许愿一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。

他们恰好在同一天出生。

庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。

她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。

妻子想周游世界。

仙女招了招手。

“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。

接下来该丈夫许愿了。

适合高一的英文幽默故事

适合高一的英文幽默故事

1、一个女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的订婚戒指,但竟没有一个同学注意到,令她忿忿不平.到下午大家坐着谈天的时候,她突然站起来大声说:“哎呀,这里真热呀,我看我还是把戒指脱下来吧.”1.the night before, a girl get boyfriend engagement ring, but no one noticed the classmate, make her antics. You sit and chat in the afternoon, she suddenly stood up and shouted: \"oh, it's really hot in here, I think I'd better take off your ring.2、女主人把女佣叫到面前问她:“你是否怀孕了?”“是啊!”女佣回道.“亏你还说得出口,你还没有结婚,难道不觉得害羞吗?”女主人再次训.“我为什么要害羞,女主人你自己不也怀孕了吗?”“可是我怀的是我丈夫的!”女主人生气地反驳.“我也是啊!”女佣高兴地附和.2, the mistress called the maid to ask her: \"are you pregnant?\" \"Yes!\" The maid answered. Export \"kui you still say, you are not married, don't you feel shy?\" The hostess training again. \"Why should I be shy, you don't the hostess also pregnant?\" \"But I conceive is my husband!\" The hostess retorted angrily. \"Me too!\" The maid happy to echo.3、一个人骑摩托车喜欢反穿衣服,就是把口子在后面扣上,可以挡风.一天他酒后驾驶, 翻了,一头栽在路旁.警察赶到:警察甲:好严重的车祸.警察乙:是啊,脑袋都撞到后面去了.警察甲:嗯,还有呼吸,我们帮他把头转回来吧.警察乙:好.一、二使劲,转回来了.警察甲:嗯,没有呼吸了.3, a man riding a motorcycle like the dress, is to cut on the back, can the wind. Drunk driving one day, he turned over, a planted on the road. Police: police a: a good serious car accident. Policeman b: yes, his head hit the back. Po1: well, still breathing, let's help him turn his head back. Po2: good... One, two, turn back. Policeman a: well, not breathing...4、在一条七拐八拐的乡村公路上,因为时常发生车祸,所以常常有一些鬼故事发生,有一天晚上,有一个出租车司机看见路边有一个长发披肩,身着白衣的女人向他招手,因为这个司机没有见过鬼,所以大胆的停下来让她上车了,这一路上,司机虽然不信有鬼,心里也毛毛的,所以时常从后视镜看后面的女人,开着开着,突然司机发现那个女人不见了!司机吓了一大跳,赶紧踩了一个刹车!只见那个女人满脸是血,表情狰狞.司机吓的牙直打颤.突然那女人开口了:“你会不会开车啊!我低头系个鞋带你突然一刹车我把鼻子都撞破了……”4, turn in a curvy country road, because often in a car accident, so often have some ghost story, one night, there's a taxi driver saw the side of the road have a long hair shawls, dressed in a white woman waved to him, because the driver didn't see a ghost, so bold stopped to let her get on the bus, along the way, the driver doesn't believe in ghosts, the in the mindalso maomao, so often the woman behind the rearview mirror to see, open open, the driver found the woman suddenly disappeared! The driver startled, hurriedly stepped on a brake! I saw the woman face is blood, grim expression. The driver frighten of teeth chatter. Suddenly the woman spoke: \"would you drive! I bow to fasten shoelaces are you smashed through a sudden brake my nose...\"5、一个病人去看病,医生检查了他,皱着眉头说:“您病得太严重了,恐怕不会活多久了.” 病人:“求您告诉我我还能活多久?” 医生:“十……” 病人着急地问:“十什么?十年?十个月?十天?” 医生:“十,九,八,七,六,五……”5, a patient to see a doctor, the doctor examined him, frowning said: \"you too serious ill, I'm afraid I won't live much longer.\" Patient: \"please tell me how long will I live?\" Doctor: \"ten...\" Patient anxiously asked: \"what? Ten years? Ten months? Ten days?\" Doctor: \"ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five...\"6、老师:“你能说一些18世纪科学家共同特点吗?”学生:“能,他们都死了.”6, teacher: \"can you say some 18 th-century scientists common characteristics?\" Student: \"yes, they are all dead.\"7、犀粪蜣和蚊子谈恋爱,蜣问蚊子是做什么工作的,蚊子说:“护士,打针的.”蜣一拍大腿:“缘分呐,我是中药局搓药丸的…”7. rhino poop Qiang and mosquito fall in love, Qiang asked a mosquitois to do what work, the mosquito said: \"nurse, give or take an injection.\" Qiang a clap a thigh: \"the fate, I am a traditional Chinese medicine bureau rub pills...\"8、一非洲人住在某一宾馆.夜半,起火,不明原因.非洲人见状顾不了那么许多,光着身子就跑出去了.消防员见状惊呼:“我的妈呀!都烧的糊了吧区的了还能跑那么快!”8, the africans live in a hotel. In the midnight, a fire, unknown reason. Before rushing so many africans, naked and ran out. Firefighters said exclaimed: \"my mama ah! All paste the burned area can run so fast!\"9、一个人想出国考察,但必须得到老总批准.于是他向老总请示,老总给了他一张字条,上面写着:“Go ahead”. 那人想:“Go ahead=前进,老总是批准了.”于是他开始打点行李. 一个同事见到了他问:“你在做什啊?”他说:“我准备出国考察,老总批准了,给我写了‘Go ahead’.” 同事一见条就乐了:“咱们老总根本就没批准!咱老总的英语水平你还不知道,他这是在说去个头!”9, a person wants to go abroad, but it must be approved by boss. So he to the manager for instructions, the boss gave him a note, it read: \"Go ahead\". The man thought, \"Go ahead = progress, boss is approved.\" So he started to packing. A colleague to see he asked: \"what are you doing?\" He said: \"I'm ready to Go abroad investigation, boss approved, wrote me 'Go ahead'.\" Colleague of joy at the sight of article: \"let's boss haven't approved! Our boss English don't you know, he is said to head!\"10、牧师对买了他马和马车的农夫说:“这匹马只能听懂教会的语言,叫"感谢上帝"它就跑;叫"赞美上帝"它才停下.”农夫将信将疑,他试着喊了一声感谢上帝,那匹马立刻飞奔起来,越跑越快.一只跑到悬崖边上惊恐的农夫才想起让它停下来的口令“赞美上帝”.果然,马停下来了.死里逃生的农夫长出一口气:“感谢上帝………”10, priests to buy his horse and carriage of the farmer said, \"this horse can only understand the language of the church, call\" thank god \"it ran; called\" praise god \"it didn't stop.\" Farmer track, he tried to thank god gave a cry, the horse gallop, immediately ran faster and faster. A run to the edge of the cliff frightened farmer remembered that let it stop password \"praise god\". Sure enough, the horse stopped. Close the farmer grows a sigh: \"thank god.\"。

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事

英语幽默小故事英语幽默小故事(Humorous English Stories)英语幽默小故事是指那些融入了幽默元素的,令人发笑的、趣味横生的故事。

这些故事往往可以轻松地让人们放松心情,以轻鬆愉快的方式学习英语,增强学习兴趣,提高英语水平。

以下是一些英语幽默小故事,欢迎各位读者阅读。

故事一:The Blind Man and the Fish一条盲鱼夹在一群鱼中间游,在它身旁的一位失明男子问:“鱼啊,你好吗?”“我很好,谢谢您,”鱼回答道:“你想知道其他鱼怎么样吗?”故事二:The Clever Chef旅馆的厨师在晚饭时,上了一盘煮熟的翅膀,但是所有的客人都觉得味道不对。

客人们投诉后,厨师想要一试,品尝后失声惊叫,原来厨师把旅馆老板的卡特车修理的机油加到翅膀里面煮,虽然味道奇特,但确实是高效率的“润滑油”。

故事三:The Secret to Happiness一个医生告诉一个病人,如果他想保持健康和幸福,就应该每天早晨起床时,抱住自己,唱一首赞美之歌,“我就是我,我很棒!”病人试着练习后,很快恢复了健康,找到了幸福。

故事四:The Wise Monkey一个猴子在树上看着一个两个人争吵,最终分不清谁对谁错。

于是这只猴子提议:“为什么不让我来当调解人呢?我将一半的苹果给你,另一半给你,以此来解决这个问题。

”一个人高兴地把自己那半苹果递给了猴子,而另一个人也高兴地接下了自己的那半苹果。

于是猴子便坐下来自己吃了整个苹果。

故事五:The Onions有个瞎眼老人走进了一家餐馆,要了一碗洋葱汤,一口一口地喝着,接下来餐馆里的每个人都一个一个传染性地开了哭泣。

老人停下来,问:“这是怎么回事?”餐馆老板笑着回答:“你切的洋葱让大家哭了出来。

”以上是一些英语幽默小故事,希望这些故事为大家带来欢乐和帮助。

通过这些小故事,人们可以轻松愉快地掌握和学习英语,从而更快地提高英语水平。

30个英语幽默童话故事

30个英语幽默童话故事

30个英语幽默童话故事1、农夫和熊英语单词:farmer 农夫、fiy 苍蝇、bear 熊。

Farmer 孤零零一人,他想,要是能找到一个朋友,就好了。

Farmer和bear成了好朋友,他们很开心。

两个朋友手拉手一块儿散步。

Farmer躺下来休息,bear一点也为累,坐在旁边。

“我要睡觉,别把我弄醒。

”Bear忠实地守护着Farmer。

嗡嗡嗡,一只fiy飞来了。

Bear挥了挥前掌,赶走了fiy。

Fiy又落到了Farmer的头上,bear拿起一块大石头嘭的一下砸向fiy。

天啊,Farmer脑袋上血肉模糊,已经死了。

2、农夫和蛇英语单词:snake 蛇、horse 马、son 儿子。

有一位善良的Farmer,总爱帮助别人。

在雪地上他看到一条snake 。

“噢,snake被冻僵了,太可怜了!”“裹进棉衣暖和暖和吧!”Farmer脱下了棉衣。

“进怀里来暖和暖和吧!”Farmer把snake 放进怀里。

snake在怀里蠕动,终于醒过来了。

snake伸出毒针,狠狠地咬了一口Farmer。

“啊!”Farmer倒地地上,horse大声嘶叫。

Farmer的儿子赶来,“哪里跑!”Farmer死前告诫儿子,任何时候都不要可怜恶人。

3、青蛙搬家英语单词:wildgoose 大雁、frog 青蛙、water 水。

frog和两个wildgoose在一起生活的很低快活。

Wildgoose哥哥说:“这儿没有火,咱们到别处去吧。

”Frog嚷着:“我也要和你们一起去。

”“你如何能跟上我们呢?”frog找来一条棍子说:“用这根棍子带上我。

”“好办法,好办法”。

他们都很高兴。

获至宝他们就这样飞起来了。

“大家快来看,wildgoose带着frog飞。

又来到一村,人们喊:“wildgoose真聪明!”frog着急地喊道:“这办法是我想出来的。

”frog从天上摔到地上。

4、狗和肉英语单词:meat 肉、wolf 狼、little dog 小狗、mother dog狗妈妈。

英语幽默小故事6篇

英语幽默小故事6篇

1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husbandasked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。

进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。

不过我们会给你们退票的。

”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。

”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。

”“我也不喜欢看。

”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。

”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said,"That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇【引言】学习英语的过程中,阅读幽默小故事不仅能够提高我们的语言能力,还能让我们在轻松愉快的氛围中领略到英语文化的魅力。

下面,就让我们一起来欣赏10篇英语幽默小故事,并在快乐中学习吧!【故事1】Once upon a time, there was a man named Jack who had a peculiar habit of always forgetting his keys.One day, he locked himself out of his house again.Instead of calling a locksmith, he decided to break into his own house through the window.As he was climbing in, he suddenly realized that he had left his keys inside the house!幽默点:Jack忘记带钥匙的习惯以及他试图通过窗户进入自己家的荒谬行为让人捧腹大笑。

【故事2】Mike was a terrible cook.One day, he decided to make dinner for his girlfriend.He spent hours in the kitchen, and when he finally served the meal, it was completely inedible.His girlfriend asked him, "What did you make?" Mike replied, "Well, it"s not quite soup, and it"s not quite stew, but you can call it "soupstew"!"幽默点:Mike的创新菜名“soupstew”让人忍俊不禁,体现了他的幽默感。

30个英语幽默童话故事

30个英语幽默童话故事

30个英语幽默童话故事1、农夫和熊英语单词:farmer 农夫、fiy 苍蝇、bear 熊。

Farmer 孤零零一人,他想,要是能找到一个朋友,就好了。

Farmer和bear成了好朋友,他们很开心。

两个朋友手拉手一块儿散步。

Farmer躺下来休息,bear一点也为累,坐在旁边。

“我要睡觉,别把我弄醒。

”Bear忠实地守护着Farmer。

嗡嗡嗡,一只fiy飞来了。

Bear挥了挥前掌,赶走了fiy。

Fiy又落到了Farmer的头上,bear拿起一块大石头嘭的一下砸向fiy。

天啊,Farmer脑袋上血肉模糊,已经死了。

2、农夫和蛇英语单词:snake 蛇、horse 马、son 儿子。

有一位善良的Farmer,总爱帮助别人。

在雪地上他看到一条snake 。

“噢,snake被冻僵了,太可怜了!”“裹进棉衣暖和暖和吧!”Farmer脱下了棉衣。

“进怀里来暖和暖和吧!”Farmer把snake 放进怀里。

snake在怀里蠕动,终于醒过来了。

snake伸出毒针,狠狠地咬了一口Farmer。

“啊!”Farmer倒地地上,horse大声嘶叫。

Farmer的儿子赶来,“哪里跑!”Farmer死前告诫儿子,任何时候都不要可怜恶人。

3、青蛙搬家英语单词:wildgoose 大雁、frog 青蛙、water 水。

frog和两个wildgoose在一起生活的很低快活。

Wildgoose哥哥说:“这儿没有火,咱们到别处去吧。

”Frog嚷着:“我也要和你们一起去。

”“你如何能跟上我们呢?”frog找来一条棍子说:“用这根棍子带上我。

”“好办法,好办法”。

他们都很高兴。

获至宝他们就这样飞起来了。

“大家快来看,wildgoose带着frog飞。

又来到一村,人们喊:“wildgoose真聪明!”frog着急地喊道:“这办法是我想出来的。

”frog从天上摔到地上。

4、狗和肉英语单词:meat 肉、wolf 狼、little dog 小狗、mother dog狗妈妈。

英语幽默小故事汇总大全

英语幽默小故事汇总大全

英语幽默小故事汇总大全幽默(yōu mò)它是外来词,这是一个音、意两译的词,其表达恰到好处。

一些幽默的英语故事,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力。

下面小编给大家介绍关于英语幽默小故事,方便大家学习。

英语幽默小故事1Put Down My Shepherd DogMan walking along a road in the countryside comes across a shepherd and a huge flock ofsheep. He tells the shepherd, "I will bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in this flock. " The shepherd thinks it over ; it's a big flock so he takes the bet. "973," says the man. The shepherd is astonished, because that is exactly right. The shepherd says, "OK, I'm a man of my word, take an animal." Man picks one up and begins to walk away .Wait, cries the shepherd, "Let me have a chance to get even . Double or nothing that I can guess your exact occupation ." Man says sure. "You are a quantitative economist for a government think tank ," says the shepherd. "Amazing!" responds the man, "You are exactly right! But tell me, how did you deduce that?"Well, says the shepherd, "put down my shepherd dog and I will tell you."放下我的牧羊犬有人在乡间小路上偶遇一位牧羊人和一大群绵羊,他对牧羊人说:“我和你打赌,如果我猜中这群羊的数目,我得你一只羊,如猜错,你得我100元。

funny story英语幽默故事

funny story英语幽默故事

5.有个老头儿的狗死了,老头就把死狗打包托运准备带回家乡厚葬。

但是托运的时候机场的人不知道是死的,下飞机的时候发现是死的,吓坏了。

以为把狗托运死了。

于是就派人去附近狗市买了一个一模一样的。

后来这老头打开行李发现狗活了。

于是老头给吓死了!3. 在中国有一个最凶残的人,名叫活活,因为我们常看到或听到:活活把人打死了、活活把人逼死了、活活把人气死了;活活把人急死了……在中国,有一个最可怜的人,名叫活活,因为我们也常看到或听到:活活被打死了、活活被急死了、活活被逼死了、活活被气死了…….美术老师问学生:“你为什么交白卷?”学生说:“我画了啊!我画的是牛吃草。

”老师问:“那草呢?”他说:“被牛吃掉了。

”老师问:“那牛呢?”他说:“吃完草走了。

”A Baby SisterNurse: Don't you like your new baby sister, Johnnie?Johnnie: She’s all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.ImitationA schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. "Well, sit down and have your tea," said his mother. "Your stomach's hurting becauseit's empty. It'll be all right when you have got something in it."Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of aheadache."That's because it's empty," said his bright son. "You'd be all right if you had something in it."I Taught the TeacherMother asked her little boy, "Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?""Nothing, Mum," answered the son proudly, "instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I taught her three."Lucky MotherA young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world. One evening, she was giving her small daughter her tea before putting her to bed. First she gave her a slice of fresh brown bread and butter,but the child said that she did not want it like that. She asked for some jam on her bread as well.Her mother looked at her for a few seconds and then said, "When I was a small girl like you, Lucy, I was always given either bread and butter, or bread and jam, but never bread with butter and jam.Lucy looked at her mother for a few moments with pity in her eyes and then said to her kindly, "Aren't you pleased that you've come to live with us now?"Things Have Been OkayA young couple was becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned.""You talked! You talked!" Shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taken this long?""Well, up till now," Said the boy, "things have been okay."Why are dogs afraid to sunbathing?They don't want to be hot-dog.What's the longest word in the world?Smiles. Because there's a mile between the letter 's'.Why does time fly?To get away from all those who are trying to kill it.Where can a dog get another tail?At a retail store.lxh660703解元学了多年的英语,突然发现一个有趣现象:cleverhonestintelligentnobleexcellentsmartelegantI saw a saw saw a saw.The brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.a man a plan a canal panamaWhat letter can fly?What letter can see?什么字母能用来看?What letter has water?什么字母里面有水?What letter we can drink?什么字母能喝?What letter is a question?什么字母是一个问题I jump into the water,who I amI ?2.Why is the letter E so important?Because it's the begining of everything!.What must you do before you return a book to the library?Borrow the book from library.Q: What are the two strongest days of the week? A: They are Saturday and Sunday. All the others are weak (week) days.。

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇

英语幽默小故事10篇摘要:1.英语幽默小故事概述2.故事1:聪明的狗3.故事2:迟到的理由4.故事3:误解的笑话5.故事4:幸运的数字6.故事5:咖啡店的对决7.故事6:调皮的孙子8.故事7:语言障碍9.故事8:购物趣事10.故事9:意外的礼物11.故事10:简单的幸福12.总结:英语幽默小故事的启示正文:【英语幽默小故事概述】在这个世界上,幽默无处不在,英语幽默小故事更是让人忍俊不禁。

这里,我们为您精心准备了10篇英语幽默小故事,它们涵盖了日常生活、工作和人际交往等多个方面,不仅让您在轻松愉快的氛围中学习英语,还能领悟到人生哲理。

接下来,让我们一一领略这些故事的魅力吧!【故事1:聪明的狗】一天,一位主人带着他的狗去散步。

突然,狗发现了一个美味的骨头,于是它决定偷偷拿走。

主人发现了狗的意图,于是对它说:“如果你能用英语告诉我这个骨头的价值,我就让你拿走。

”狗想了想,用英语回答:“This bone is worth a lot.”主人听后笑了笑,把骨头给了狗。

这个故事告诉我们,学习英语是有好处的。

【故事2:迟到的理由】一个人因为迟到被同事嘲笑,他解释说:“我今天起床后发现家里的钟停了,所以我以为是早上7点。

结果,我以最快的速度赶到公司,结果还是迟到了。

”这个故事告诉我们,有时候,迟到的理由也能带来幽默。

【故事3:误解的笑话】一位外国游客在中国餐馆点了一份“狗不理包子”,结果服务员端上来一盘狗肉。

游客大怒,喊道:“我点的不是狗肉,是狗不理包子!”这个故事告诉我们,语言误解会导致笑话。

【故事4:幸运的数字】一位迷信的同事对公司里的每个人都说:“我的车牌号是168,意味着一路发,所以今天我一定会走运。

”结果,当天他出了车祸。

有人问他:“你的车牌号不是意味着一路发吗?怎么还会出车祸?”他回答:“是啊,可是我忘了,168还意味着一路傻瓜。

”【故事5:咖啡店的对决】一位顾客在咖啡店点了一杯咖啡,服务员问他:“您要加糖吗?”顾客回答:“不用,我已经够甜了。

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1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.GAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAF“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一對夫婦帶著他們3歲的兒子去看電影。

進電影院時,服務員對他們說:“如果你們的兒子哭了,你們就得出去。

不過我們會給你們退票的。

”大約半個小時以后,丈夫對妻子說:“你覺得這電影怎么樣?”“我從沒看過這么沒勁的電影。

”妻子回答說,“真不值得看。

”“我也不喜歡看。

”丈夫說:“叫醒孩子,讓他哭。

”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andGAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAFburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said, "That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一個剛結婚的太太,坐在椅子那邊,看起來很懊惱,她先生回家看到她這個樣子,就問:‘嗨,你怎么啦?為什么看起來這么懊惱呢?’太太說:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西裝褲被我燙壞了,燙成一個洞了。

’他先生說:‘啊!那個沒關系啦!我還有另外一件一樣的褲子。

’她說:‘是啊,還好我把那件新的拿出來補那件被我燙壞的。

’3、Endearing terms英語幽默故事:可愛的稱呼GAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAFBernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago." Bernie應邀來到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。

在朋友家,Bernie發現,不管問他老婆什么問題,Morris總要在每句話的前面加上一些親密的稱呼,象蜜糖,我的愛人,親愛的,甜心等等。

Bernie對Morris說,“你們夫妻倆真夠親密的,結婚這么多年了,你還叫她叫得那么親密。

”Morris低下頭,小聲地對Bernie說,“老實跟你說吧,三年前我忘記老婆的真名是什么了。

”4、Are you a normal person?你是正常人嗎?GAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAFDuring a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director ..., "What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized?" "Well..." said the director, "we fill up a bathtub, and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup." "Noooooooo!" answered the director. "A normal person would pull the plug."參觀一所精神病院的時候一個參觀者問院長,“你們是用什么標準來決定一個人是否應該被關進精神病院呢?”“呃……”院長說,“是這樣,我們先給一個浴缸放滿水,然后我們給病人一個調茶匙,一個茶杯和一個水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清。

”“噢,我明白了”,參觀者說。

“一個正常人會選擇水桶,因為水桶比茶匙,茶杯的體積大。

”“錯了”,“院長回答”“正常人會把浴缸塞子拔掉”。

GAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAF5、英文幽默老虎來了Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them.One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?"His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you."兩個男人正在穿過叢林,突然,一只老虎出現在遠處,向他們沖來。

其中的一個人從包里拿出一雙“耐克”鞋,開始穿上。

另一個人驚奇地看著他說,“你以為穿上這個就可以跑得過老虎嗎?”GAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAF他的朋友回答道:“我不用跑得過它,我只要跑得比你快就行了。

”6、Another 40 Years to live再活40年A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to theGAGGAGAGGAFFFFAFAFhospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you."一名中年婦女心臟病突發被送到了醫院,在手術臺上,瀕臨死亡之際,她看到了上帝,于是,她問上帝是不是她的日子到頭了。

上帝回答說,“還沒有,你還能活43年,2個月零8天。

”身體快要康復的時候,這名女士想到自己還要活那么多年,得好好對待自己,于是決定先不出院,而是去給自己整整容,吸吸脂,隆隆胸,然后還做了一個腹部拉皮和其它一些美容美體手術。

她甚至還請人到醫院里面幫她頭發給染了。

做完最后一個手術,這位女士出院了,但就在過馬路的時候,她被一輛風馳電摯趕回醫院的救護車給撞死了。

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