英语幽默小笑话六篇

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英语小笑话

英语小笑话

1 、好孩子 A Good BoyA Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You’re a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

”昨天给你的钱干什么了?“ ”我给了一个可怜的老太婆, “他回答说。

”你真是个好孩子, “妈妈骄傲地说。

“再给你两分钱。

可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣 呢?” “她是个卖糖果的。

”2、时间对猪有什么意义? Whats time to a pig?One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?" 一天,有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子, 也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。

英语小笑话 带翻译

英语小笑话 带翻译
笑话三中,“gummy bear”一词既可以指果冻熊(一种美国产的以果胶为胶体基质凝固制成的糖果),也可以表示没有牙齿的熊。这个笑话也是通过双关的方式,将不同的词语联系在一起,形成了幽默效果。
笑话四中,“home”既可以指家,也可以指“归宿”,所以员工中奖后“去家里了”也可以理解为“找到了自己的归宿”。这个笑话利用了“home”这个词的双重含义,变相映射了中奖后员工的行为。
Because it had too many problems.
为什么数o you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
你怎么称呼一个没有牙齿的熊?
果冻熊。
笑话四:What did the employee do after winning the lottery?
笑话五中,“held up”一词既可以指阻碍、延误,也可以指抢劫。所以这个笑话的双关在于通过皮带的“支撑”和“阻碍”之间的联系,制造了一种幽默效果。
总结来说,这几个笑话利用了英语的语言特点,通过双关的方式,让人在听到笑话的瞬间产生一种意想不到的幽默感。这也正是英语笑话的魅力所在,通过语言的巧妙运用,创造出了一种诙谐的氛围,让人忍俊不禁。希望大家在学习英语的同时,多多接触英语笑话,感受英语语言的魅力。
英语小笑话 带翻译
笑话一:Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
老师:你爸爸有没有帮你做功课?
学生:没有,是他自己全部做的。
笑话二:Why was the math book sad?
笑话一中,学生回答“他自己全部做的”是指他的父亲没有帮助他,但也可以理解为“他”指的是学生的父亲,他自己做了所有的功课。这是一个双关的笑话,利用了英语中的语言特点,呈现了一种幽默的效果。

英语爆笑笑话12篇

英语爆笑笑话12篇

英语爆笑笑话12篇推荐文章爆笑英语笑话加翻译合集热度:有关爆笑英语小笑话带翻译热度:爆笑小学生英文小笑话大全孩子喜欢的热度:英文经典有趣爆笑的小笑话热度:关于英语的儿童爆笑笑话热度:英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言。

下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话篇一:她要买什么A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma’am, we haven't had any for a while, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll have somesoon, We placed an order last week. Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything say we've got it on order and it's coming.Now what was it she wanted? Rain, said the clerk.一个商店经理听见一个店员对顾客说:不,夫人,这会儿没有,一时半会儿看来也不会有。

经理惊恐万分地跑到顾客跟前说:当然,马上就会有的。

我们上周订了货。

然后经理把店员拉到一边:千万,千万,千万不要说我们没有什么,说我们已经订了货,货马上就到。

现在你说她要买什么? 雨,店员说。

英语爆笑笑话篇二:现在几点了The two boys were camping in the backyard. When they couldn't figure out what time it was, the first boy said to the second, "Start singing very loud.""How will that help?" said the second boy."Just do it," insisted the first.Both boys broke into song, singing at the top of their lungs. Moments later, a neighbor threw open her window and shouted,"Keep it down! Don't you know it's three o'clock in the morning?"两个男孩子在后院露营,他们不知道到了晚上几点钟。

英语幽默的小笑话精选

英语幽默的小笑话精选

英语幽默的小笑话精选篇一:英语小笑话集锦英语幽默小笑话1、Little Robert asked his mother for two cents.”What did you do with the money (that/which/不填)I gave you yesterday?”“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered. “You are a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are two cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?”“She is the one who sells the candy.”好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”“我给了一个可怜的老太婆。

”他回答说。

“你真是一个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说. “再给你两分钱。

可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣?”“她是个卖糖果的。

”2、Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?”“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan.“Would you recognize him if you saw him again?”asked his mother.“I?d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”他的耳朵在我的衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”“咬了我一口。

”说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”说,“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里。

”3、Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow(燕子), the other is sparrow(麻雀). Now who can tell us which is which?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.Teacher: Please tell us.Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.两只鸟老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。

英语幽默冷笑话6篇

英语幽默冷笑话6篇

英语幽默冷笑话6篇下面是店铺整理的英语幽默冷笑话,希望对大家有帮助。

英语幽默冷笑话:"Ten steps from the porch(门廊) and twenty steps from the rose bushes," growled Bluebeard in Jimmy's dream one night. "There be treasure there! Aawrgh."So the next day Jimmy began to dig. He dug until the hole was deep and the dirt pile was high.He kept digging. The hole got deeper and the dirt pile got higher.He dug until the hole was deepest and the dirt pile was at its highest. He sighed. "I'm too tired. I can't dig anymore." Then he spied something... but it was only one of Woofy's bones. Instead of treasure, all Jimmy had was a dog bone, a hole, and a big pile of dirt to fill it in with. He thought "That pirate lied to me!"But when Jimmy's mother saw what he had done, she clasped(紧抱,扣紧) her hands and smiled a smile from here to Sunday. "Oh, thank you, Jimmy. I always wanted a rhododendron(杜鹃) bush planted just there. Here's $5.00 for digging that hole."英语幽默冷笑话:可怜的男人A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression.Bartender: "What's the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?"The man: "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn't going to speak to me for a month."Bartender: "That should make you happy."The man: "No, the month is up today!"一个男人坐在酒吧里,伤心至极。

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话英语幽默笑话(精选15篇) 在繁忙的学习⼯作中,适时读⼀些幽默笑话,放松⾃⼰,劳逸结合⼗分重要。

下⾯是⼩编为你整理的⼏则英语幽默精彩段⼦,让你笑到停不下来 英语幽默笑话篇1 ⼀、我是单⾝汉 Jack feell off his bicycle and got hurt.A beautiful young nurse asked him to fill forms.Jack finished them and gave them back."Anything else?" The nurse asked."Yes,"Jack thinks for a while and said,"I'm a bachelor." 杰克骑车摔伤,得住院治疗.⼀位年轻美貌的护⼠拿着表格让填.仞杰克填好递上表格"还有什么漏填的?"护⼠问."有!"杰克想了想说,"我是个单⾝汉." ⼆、死于肝癌的⼈100%都吃饭 Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho. Husband:It's okey.To my investigation,all Thespeopleeat meals. 妻⼦:你看这张报纸,据统计,死于肝癌的⼈80%都是喝酒的. 丈夫:那有什么?据我调查,死于肝癌的⼈100%都吃饭的. 三、位置上的冰激凌 "Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine." "Yours?Can you prove it?" "Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it." "请原谅,你占了我的位置." "你的位置?你能征明这点吗?" "能,我在位置上放了杯冰激凌." 四、别⽆选择 One day,Eve asked Adam,"Doyou really love me?" Adam said helplessly,"Do I have any other choice?" ⼀天,夏娃问亚当:"你当真爱我吗?" 亚当⽆可奈何地回答:"我还有的选择吗?" 五、两个男孩 Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says,"Why are you arguing?" One boy answers,"We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher,"When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher. 当⽼师⾛进教室时,两个男孩在争论. ⽼师是说:你们在争论什么? ⼀个男孩回答:‘我们捡到⼀张10块,我们决定把它给⼀个说最⼤的谎的⼈.’ ‘你们应该觉得羞耻’⽼师说,‘当我像你们那么⼤的时候,我连什么是说谎都不知道.’ 两个男孩把钱给了那个⽼师. 六、两只鸟 Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which? Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer. Teacher:Please tell us. Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. ⽼师:这⼉有两只鸟,⼀只是⿇雀.谁能指出哪只是燕⼦,哪只是⿇雀吗? 学⽣:我指不出,但我知道答案. ⽼师:请说说看. 学⽣:燕⼦旁边的`就是⿇雀,⿇雀旁边的就是燕⼦. 七、鱼⽹ "Can you tell me what fish net is made,Ann?" "A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl. "你能告诉我鱼⽹是什么做的吗," ⽼师发问道. "把许多⼩孔⽤绳⼦栓在⼀起就成了鱼⽹了." ⼩⼥孩回答道. ⼋、他赢了 Tommy:How is your little brother,Johnny?Johnny:He is ill in bed.He hurt himself. Tommy:That's too bad.How did that happen? Johnny:We played who could lean furthest out of the window,and he won. 汤姆:约翰尼,你⼩弟弟好吗? 约翰尼:他害病卧床了.他受了伤. 汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事⼉? 约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把⾝⼦探出窗外最远,他赢了. 选我吧 英语幽默笑话篇2 ⼼不在焉的⽼师 An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street withone foot continually in the gutter,the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said: “Good evening,professor.How are you? “Well,” answered the professor,“I thought I was all right when I left home,but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.” 有⼀天,⼈们看见⼀个有名的⼼不在焉的⽼师在路上⾛,他的⼀只脚⼀直踏在街沟⾥,另⼀只脚踩在⼈⾏道上。

英语开心一刻幽默小笑话大全

英语开心一刻幽默小笑话大全

英语开心一刻幽默小笑话大全笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。

下面是店铺带来的英语开心一刻幽默小笑话,欢迎阅读!英语开心一刻幽默小笑话篇一A farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. There was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. The motorist, in hurry, honked his horn ."If you don't back up," said the farmer, rolling up his sleeves, I won't like what I'm going to have to do." The surprised driver put his car in reverse and backed up two miles, allowing the horse and buggy to go by. "What was it you wouldn't have liked to have done back there?" asked the farmer's son."Back up two miles," replied the farmer.一位农夫和他的儿子乘坐轻便马车来到一段窄路,他们遇到一个开车的人向相反的方向去。

两个方向的两英里以内都没有地方可以使他们相擦而过。

驾车人甚是着急,按响了喇叭。

“如果你不后退,”农夫说着撸起了袖子,“我可不喜欢我将不得不做的事。

”司机吃惊不小,挂上倒挡,向后退了两英里,让轻便马车先过去。

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)英国人有他们独特的英式幽默,他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑,今天,小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话,希望大家能开心开心,一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说:“你的英语最近学的怎么样?”“很好,我过去不懂英国人说话,可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

与英语有关的笑话

与英语有关的笑话

与英语有关的笑话笑话一:英语考试的难题有一天,小明参加了英语考试。

考试题目非常难,根本不知道如何下手。

小明看着试卷上的第一道题,上面写着:“请用英语翻译下面的句子:‘我的猫在屋子里睡觉’。

”他想了一会儿,终于决定回答:“My cat sleeps in the room.” 结果,他错了!笑话二:拼写错误的尴尬在一个英语课上,老师问小明:“请你在黑板上拼写‘电视’这个单词。

”小明听到后,自信满满地上前去写。

他认真地写下了“T-E-L-E-V-S-I-O-N”这个单词。

全班爆发出一阵笑声,可是小明却不明白大家在笑什么。

笑话三:英语学习的困惑小李正在学习英语的时候碰到了一个很难理解的词汇 - "heteronym"(同音异形词)。

他询问了老师,老师解释说:“就是不同的单词拼写相同但读音和意思不同。

”小李听后恍然大悟,他说:“噢,你的意思是‘homonym’(同音同形词)吧!”老师苦笑着点了点头。

笑话四:音标的误解小红正在努力学习英语的发音。

有一天,她看到一个生词“schedule”(日程表),但不知道它的正确读音。

她问了很多人,但得到的回答都不尽相同。

最终,她决定向老师请教。

老师在她的本子上写下了正确的发音:“/ˈʃɛd.juːl/”,小红看了之后茅塞顿开,满怀信心地说:“哦,看来它读作'sked-yule'。

”笑话五:语法解释的幽默小明在英语课上学习了形容词的比较级和最高级。

他灵机一动,想到了一个搞笑的问题:“老师,如果'good'的比较级是'better',那最高级是不是'bester'?”全班哄然大笑,而小明尴尬地明白了自己的错误。

笑话六:难以理解的字母顺序小张学习英语的时候遇到了一个难题,他对于字母表的顺序感到困惑。

他问了老师:“老师,为什么字母表中U和I的顺序不是按照字母表顺序排列的?”老师微笑着回答:“因为UI是一个表情符号,表示‘你和我’。

有趣的英文笑话

有趣的英文笑话

有趣的英文笑话忙碌的生活中,适时阅读一些有趣的英文笑话,能够很好地放松我们生活的压力,下面店铺为大家带来有趣的英文笑话,希望大家喜欢!有趣的英文笑话1:A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible, " she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”一位年轻的丈夫下班回到家里,发现新娘心烦意乱。

“我心里太难受了,她说,我在给你熨西装时把裤子的臀部烧了个大洞。

”"Forget It,n"said her husband. "Remember that l've got an extra pair of pants for that suit.“没事儿,”丈夫安慰她说,你忘了我这套衣服有两条裤子。

"Yes,”said t he woman.cheering up. "And it's luckY you have.I used another pants to patch the hole."”是的,“妻子高兴地说,幸亏你还有一条,我后来就用它来补了这个洞了。

有趣的英文笑话2:On our way to a wedding in Vermont, my husband and I realized we had forgotten our camera. We stopped at a general store and, hoping to purchase a cheap,disposable model. Sal asked the owner, ¨Do you have any of those throwaway cameras?在前往威蒙特参加一个婚礼的路上,我和丈夫意识到我们忘了带照相机。

最搞笑的英语小笑话十则

最搞笑的英语小笑话十则

最搞笑的英语小笑话十则篇一:爆笑的经典英语小笑话英语笑话(一)老师在黑板上写了一句:Time is money.并让同学们翻译。

有名学生答道:“汤姆是玛丽。

” 小明上英文课时跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?老师说:Go ahead.小明就坐了下来。

过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?老师说:Go ahead.小明又坐了下来。

他旁边的同学于是忍不住问:你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗?怎么不去?小明说:你没听老师说「去你个头」啊!英语笑话(二)某日刘洪涛遇到外宾,上前搭话曰:I am hongtao liu,外宾曰:我TM还是方片七呢!英语笑话(三)江青会见外宾,要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻,不许走样。

外宾一见到江青,立刻拍马屁道:"Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful." 翻译照翻,江青心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下:“哪里,哪里”。

翻译不敢怠慢,把江青的话翻成英文:"Where? Where?" 外宾一愣,还有这样的人,追问哪里漂亮的,干脆马屁拍到底:"Everywhere, everywhere."翻译:“你到处都很漂亮。

”江青更高兴了,但总是要客气一下:“不见得,不见得”。

翻译赶紧翻成英文:"You are not allowed to see, you are not allowed to see."英语笑话(四)话说某年某月的某一天,叁个神箭手约在一起比箭,目标是十尺外仆人头上的苹果。

A 神箭手挽弓长射,咻一声,利箭正中苹果。

A高傲的昂起下巴,比出一根大拇指道:「I AM 后羿!」B神箭手照本宣科,射中苹果,这回他自大的喊了一句:「I AM丘比特!」轮到C了,他也挽弓,利箭射出!结果正中仆人的心脏。

就听他结结巴巴好久才吐出一句:「I...I...I...AM...SORRY...」英语笑话(五)某人刻苦学习英语,终有小成。

英语搞笑笑话6篇

英语搞笑笑话6篇

英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中,它是笑话的精料,智慧之所在。

笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古。

下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一:How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了,在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人,我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。

孩子们齐声回答:“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂,给院子的草坪割草,并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁,我会上天堂吗?”回答还是:“不能!”“好吧,”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道:“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二:I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。

英语笑话简短【英语笑话】

英语笑话简短【英语笑话】

英语笑话简短【英语笑话】篇一:英文幽默笑话1.猫和老鼠——Mrs Brown went tovisit one of her friend andcarried a small box withholes punched in the top.——“ What's in yourbox?" asked the friend.——"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."—— "But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.——"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友,她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。

“盒子里装的是什么?”朋友问道。

“一只小猫,”布朗夫人回答说,“你知道我晚上睡觉总梦见老鼠,我非常害怕。

这只猫可以抓住那些老鼠。

”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。

”朋友说。

“小猫也是假想的。

”布朗夫人小声说道。

2.Reached Shore Fast 快速靠岸A guy I know wastowing his boat homefrom a fishing trip to LakeHuron when his car brokedown. He didn't have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be abletoraise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, "Mayday, mayday." A Coast Guard officer came on and said, "State your location.""I-75, two miles south of Standish." After a very long pause, the officer asked, "How fast were you going when you reached shore?"在休伦湖钓完鱼后,我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。

英语幽默笑话集锦

英语幽默笑话集锦

英语幽默笑话集锦笑话1:鸡蛋的问题小明问小华:“你怎么知道一个鸡蛋是生的还是熟的?”小华:“很简单,我把鸡蛋放进水里,如果浮起来就是生的,如果沉下去就是熟的。

”小明:“那如果鸡蛋半浮半沉呢?”小华:“那就是半生不熟。

”笑话2:打电话小明用英语给外国朋友打电话:“Hello! Is it Mr. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友说:“I’m sorry, you have the wrong number.”小明再打一次:“Hello! Is it Mrs. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友愤怒地说:“No, I told you already, you have the wrong number!”小明再打一次:“Hello! Is it Mr. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友非常生气:“I can’t believe you called me again! This is not Mr. Brown’s residence!”小明笑着说:“I know, but I just love hearing you say it!”笑话3:父亲的损失小明的父亲对他说:“小明,你知道我为什么戴假发吗?”小明好奇地问:“为什么呢?”父亲严肃地回答:“因为我是个有发言权的人。

”笑话4:天堂和地狱有一天,人们来到上帝面前询问天堂和地狱的存在。

他们问上帝:“天堂和地狱是什么样子的?”上帝微笑着回答:“我带你们去看一看。

”首先,上帝打开了通向地狱的门。

门一打开,他们看到里面是一个宴会厅,摆满了美食和饮料,但每个人手中都拿着又长又粗的筷子,无法把食物送入嘴中。

接着,上帝带着他们去了天堂。

天堂的门打开后,他们看到了和地狱一样的情景,宴会厅里也是美食和饮料满满,每个人同样手中拿着又长又粗的筷子。

但人们却高兴地吃得很满足,因为在天堂里,他们都学会了相互喂食。

笑话5:自动售货机小明走到一个自动售货机前,看见上面写着:“请用英语选择您要购买的商品。

英语幽默短笑话10篇

英语幽默短笑话10篇

英语幽默短笑话10篇英语幽默短笑话1.Mike:Mum,I want to watch TV.Mum:There is no electricity tonight.Mike:Then let's watch TVwith a candie on.迈克:妈妈,我想看电视。

妈妈:今晚停电了。

迈克:那我们就点着蜡烛看吧。

英语幽默短笑话2.The Fish Net"Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?""A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl."你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?" 老师发问道。

"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

" 小女孩回答道。

英语幽默短笑话3.Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?""I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered."You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?""She is the one who sells the candy."小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。

“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。

下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一:我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说:“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。

我妻子是财政部长。

我岳母是作战部长,我女儿是外交秘书。

”“听上去挺有意思的,”他的同事说,“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。

我要做的一切就是付钱。

”英语笑话二:喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭,父亲把服务生叫了过来。

幽默爆笑的英语的小笑话

幽默爆笑的英语的小笑话

幽默爆笑的英语的小笑话【导语】学习英语是很容易枯燥的,那么我们就来看看英语的笑话吧,以下是由苏阳文斋给大家分享一下英语笑话,希望大家喜欢!【篇一】幽默爆笑的英语的小笑话The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译:鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

小女孩回答道。

【篇二】幽默爆笑的英语的小笑话律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"翻译:一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

英语笑话

英语笑话

英语笑话篇一:英文幽默笑话1.猫和老鼠——Mrs Brown went tovisit one of her friend andcarried a small box withholes punched in the top.——” What’s in yourbox?” asked the friend.——”A cat,” answered Mrs Brown. “You see I’ve been dreaming about mice at night and I’m so scared! This cat is to catch them.”——“But the mice are only imaginary,”said the friend.——”So is the cat,” whispered Mrs Brown.布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友,她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。

“盒子里装的是什么?”朋友问道。

“一只小猫,”布朗夫人回答说,“你知道我晚上睡觉总梦见老鼠,我非常害怕。

这只猫可以抓住那些老鼠。

”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。

”朋友说。

“小猫也是假想的。

”布朗夫人小声说道。

Shore Fast 快速靠岸A guy I know wastowing his boat homefrom a fishing trip to LakeHuron when his car brokedown. He didn’t have his cell phone with him, but he thought maybe he might be abletoraise someone on his marine radio to call for roadside assistance. He climbed into his boat, clicked on the radio and said, “Mayday, mayday.”A Coast Guard officer came on and said, “State your location.”“I-75, two miles south of Standish.”After a very long pause, the officer asked, “How fast were you going when you reached shore?”在休伦湖钓完鱼后,我的一个朋友开车拖着他的船回家。

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英语幽默小笑话六篇
frog 青蛙
Frog The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."
老师正在给学生上生物课:“现在,我将要给你们看我袋子里的这只青蛙。

”接着,他把手伸进口袋,却拿出了一份鸡肉三文治。

老师满脸困惑地看了一眼,沉思了一会儿,说道:“真奇怪。

我明明记得我已经把午饭吃掉了。


人们什么时候说话最少?
Teacher: What is the plural of man,Tom?
老师: 汤姆,“男人”这个词的复数形式是什么?
Tom: Men.
汤姆:男人们。

Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?
老师: 答得好。

那“孩子”的复数形式呢?
Tom : Twins.
汤姆: 双胞胎。

谁欠谁钱
A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. Butcher goes to lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely." "Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today." The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. Several days later, the butcher opens the mail and finds an envelope from the lawyer: $250 due for a consultation.
律师的狗,没有拴而到处闲逛,它来到一家肉店,偷走了一块烤肉。

店主来到律师的办公室,问道“如果一条没栓的狗从我的商店里偷了块肉,我有权利从狗的主人那里要回损失吗?律师答道:“完全可以”,“那你欠我8.50美元,你的狗没栓而且今天从我的店里头了块肉”,律师什么都没说,马上给他写了一张支票。

一些天后,店主打开邮箱,发现一封来自律师的信,信上写道:咨询费250美元。

I Have His Ear in My Pocket
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。

“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。


Give up your seat to a lady给女士让座
Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"You've done the right thing," says Mommy.
"But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap."
小强尼说:“妈妈,今天早上和爸爸在公车上时,他叫我让座给一位女士。


妈妈说:“你做得很对呀。


“但是,妈妈,我是坐在爸爸膝盖上的。


What Was It She Wanted?
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer.“No,ma’am,we haven't had any for a while,and it doesn't look asif we'll be getting soon.”Horrified,the manager came runningover to the customer and said,“Of course,we'll have somesoon,We placed an order last week.”Then the manager drewthe clerk aside:“Never,never,never say we are out of anything—say we've got it on order and it's coming.Now whatwas it she wanted?”“Rain.”said the clerk.
一个商店经理听见一个店员对顾客说:“不,夫人,这会儿没有,一时半会儿看来也不会有。

”经理惊恐万分地跑到顾客跟前说:“当然,马上就会有的。

我们上周订了货。

”然后经理把店员拉到一边:“千万,千万,千万不要说我们没有什么——说我们已经订了货,货马上就到。

现在你说她要买什么?”“雨,”店员说。

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