英语小笑话(精选25篇)

英语小笑话（精选25篇）一、什么是笑话笑话是一个汉语词汇，拼音是xiào hua，意思是引人发笑的话或事情。

笑话具有篇幅短小，故事情节简单而巧妙，往往出人意料，给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。

大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象，具有讽刺性和娱乐性。

其趣味有高下之分。

笑话也可以是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感，而感到开心好笑。

2008年6月7日，笑话经国务院批准列入第二批国家级非物质文化遗产名录。

二、英语小笑话（精选25篇）笑话，是流传于民间的，就当今社会，每天都有很多笑话出现，有心人如果收集，我想将来一定会有价值，同时丰富了笑话的宝库。

以下是小编为大家收集的英语小笑话（精选25篇），欢迎阅读，希望大家能够喜欢。

英语小笑话1 Dentist: Please stop howling.I havent even touched your tooth yet.Patient: I know.But you are standing on my foot!牙医：请不要再叫了，我都还没有挨着你的牙齿啊!病人：可是，亲，你可明白，你踩到我脚了！英语小笑话2 Guest: Why does your dog sit there and watchme eat?Hotel Host: I cant imagine,unless its because you have the plate he usually eats from.客人：“为什么你的狗狗坐在那儿老是看着我吃东西呢?”旅馆主人：“我不敢想象，除非是因为你拿了它经常用来吃东西的盘子了。

”英语小笑话3 Does the dog know the proverb,too?The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.Its all right, said a gentleman,dont be afraid. Dont you know the proverb: Barking dogs dont bite?Ah,yes, answered the little boy. I know the proverb,but does the dog know the proverb,too?狗也明白这个谚语吗?一个小男孩十分不喜欢狗狂叫的样貌。

“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你明白这条谚语吗：‘吠狗不咬人。

’”“啊，我是明白，可是狗也明白吗?”英语小笑话 4 George es from school on the first of September.George,how did you like your new teacher? asked his mother.I didnt like her,Mother,because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too.9月1日，乔治放学回到家里。

“乔治，你喜欢你们的新教师吗？”妈妈问。

“妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6，可之后又说2加4也得6。

”英语小笑话 5 Dentist: Im sorry,madam,but Ill have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your sons tooth.Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction.Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so loud,he scared four other patients out of the office.昂贵的代价牙科医生：对不起，夫人，为给您的儿子拔牙，我得收二十五美元。

母亲：二十五美元!可是我明白您拔一颗牙只要五美元呀?牙科医生：是的。

可是您儿子这么大声地叫唤，他都吓跑四位病人了。

英语小笑话6 A professor was giving a big test one day to his students.He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in.The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying A dollarper point.The next class the professor handed the tests back out.This student got back his test and $64 change.一天，教授正在给学生们监考。

他发下试卷，然后回到讲台前等待。

考试结束了，学生们纷纷交回试卷。

教授发现一张试卷上别着一张百元钞票，还有一张纸条写着：“一分一块钱。

”第二堂课，教授把试卷都发回学生们手中。

其中一个学生不但得到了试卷还得到64块钱的`找零。

英语小笑话7 After supper,the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests.At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV,Honey,go see if the kitchen light is on or not? After a while,her son returnedand said,Ma,the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all.我根本就看不见晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。

”英语小笑话8 Toms excuseTeacher:Tom,why are you late for school every day?Tom:Every time I e to the corner,a sign says,School-Go Slow.汤姆的借口教师：汤姆，您为什么每一天上学迟到?汤姆：我每次走过拐角，一个路标上头写着：学校——慢行。

英语小笑话9 Excuse me,but the seat youve taken is mine.Yours?Can you prove it?Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it.请原谅，你占了我的位置。

你的位置?你能征明这点吗?能，我在位置上放了杯冰激凌。

英语小笑话10 The poor husbandYou cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife, the man plained to his friend.She asks me a question,then answers it herself,and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.可怜的丈夫“你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，“她问我一个问题，然后自我回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。

”英语小笑话11 Put your feet inThe school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out into the aisle,and was busily chewing gum, when the teacherespied her. Mary ! called the teacher sharply. Yes,Madam? questioned the pupil, Take that gum out of your mouth and put your feet in!把脚放进去一个女学生坐在座位上，嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖，脚却伸到课桌间的走道里，被教师发现了。

“玛丽!”教师严厉地叫她。

“什么事，教师?”这女学生问。

“把口香糖从嘴里拿出来，把脚放进去。

”英语小笑话12 A father of five came home with a toy,summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present,“Who is the most obedient,never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?”he inquired.There was silence and then a chorus of voices: “You play with it,Daddy!”一个有五个孩子的父亲带着一件玩具回到家里，把孩子们召集来问这件礼物应当给谁。

“谁最听话，从不和妈妈顶嘴，让干什么就干什么?”他问道。

大家都不吭声。

过了一会儿，孩子们异口同声地说：“爸爸，您玩儿吧。

”英语小笑话13 Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents house.At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers, when the younger one began praying at the top of his lungs: I pray for a bicycle.I pray for a new toy.His older brother leaned over, nudged him and said, Why are you shouting your prayers? God isnt deaf.To which the little brother replied, No, but Grandma is!孩子的祈祷两个小男孩在祖父母家过夜。