简短幽默的英语小故事
幽默简短的英语小故事
幽默简短的英语小故事幽默简短的英语小故事(精选16篇)在平时阅读幽默又简短的一些英语小故事,是可以帮助提高我们的英语水平的。
一起来看看店铺为大家整理幽默简短的英语小故事,欢迎大家阅读!幽默简短的英语小故事篇1The Old Cat:An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."幽默简短的英语小故事篇2Everybody dreams of doing something important. As a boy Raymond dreamed of being a scientist,infact, he is a postman now.Raymon d is an active young man. He livesby the saying“If you can't live the life you love, love the life you live”He greets everyone with a big smileand afriendly“Hi, howare you?”And he really wants to know! It's hardto feel unhappy when we hear him whistling happily up and down the street.幽默简短的英语小故事篇3Not long after my sister's wedding,one of my father's colleagues and his wife dropped in to see Mom and Dad.Theguests had not been invited to the wedding, so when the woman said,”I'm sorry I didn't get over to t he church the other day,”Mom assumed she meant the church's Good Cheer Club Tea and Bazaar."I'rn glad you didn't.”Mom replied.”You never saw such a mob scene!""I thought I'd like to see how everyone was dressed,"the guest said."What did you wear?""Just m y old navy print and my oxfords,“said Mom,"and a good thing,too,as we cleared almost a thousand dollars. ""Did you take a collection?"the woman gasped.“"Oh, no,“said Mom,"you know how it is,a lot of people come just to look and you don't make a thing out of them,so we decided to charge admission at the door.”At this point Dad realized signals were crossed,and he suggested to Mom that she explain that my sister's wedding had been neither a mob scene nor a profit-making venture.幽默简短的英语小故事篇4A big一city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher claimed that the bull must have been hit by the train, and wanted o be paid the fair value of the bull.The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. As soon as the rancher showed up, the attorney for the railroad pulled him aside and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking. After the rancher had signed the release and took the check,the young lawyer couldn’t resist gloating a little over his success,telling the rancher, "You know, I hate to tell you this, oldman,but I put one over on you in there. I couldn’t have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn’t have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you!”The old rancher replied,"Well,I’11 tell you,young Teller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that darned bull came home this morning.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇5One day, Robin Hood went hunting alone in the forest. He had told his men that if he should fall into any danger and could not escape he would blow his horn so that they might know and come to help him. When he was crossing a river by a long bridge he met a huge man at the middle.And neither of the two would give way to the other. Robin Hood got angry and put an arrow to his bow and made ready to shoot. The stranger said it was unfair for Robin Hood to shoot a man who had only a staff in his hand. Hearing this Robin Hood lay down his bow and pulled up a small tree and returned to the stranger.幽默简短的英语小故事篇6A farmer is wondering how many sheep he has in his field, so he asks his sheepdog to count them. The dog runs into the field, counts them, and then runs back to his master."So," says the farmer. "How many sheep were there?""40," replies the dog."How can there be 40?" exclaims the farmer. "I only bought 38!""I know," says the dog. "But I rounded them up."幽默简短的英语小故事篇7Many years afterreceivingmygraduatedegree, I returned tothe State University of New York at Binghamton as afacultymember. One day in a crowdedelevator, someone remarked on itsinefficiency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.When the door finally opened, I felt acompassionatepaton my back, and turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. "You'll get that degree, dear," shewhispered. "Perseverance is a virtue." 幽默简短的英语小故事篇8A newly married woman was sitting on a chair, looking vexed, when her husband came home. "What's up? Why do you look so troubled?" the husband asked. The woman replied, "I'm so sorry.I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said, "That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair," the wife responded.幽默简短的英语小故事篇9A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc.She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you."幽默简短的英语小故事篇10The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film. When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them, “you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refund you the tic kets.”About half an hour later, the husband asked his wife, “What do you think of the film?” “I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered. “It’s not worth seeing.” “I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said. “Wake the child up and let him cry.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇11A hillbilly was visiting the big city for the first time. Entering an office building, he saw a pudgy older woman step into a small room. The doors closed, lights flashed, and after a while the door slid open and a beautiful young model stepped off the elevator.Blinking in amazement, the hillbilly drawled, "I should have brought my wife!"幽默简短的英语小故事篇12Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before , so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?""Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."幽默简短的英语小故事篇13A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog cocked its leg, then urinated on its owner. Calmly, the blind man reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog.A passerby who'd seen everything remarked: "That’s extremely tolerant of you, especially after what he just did.”"Not really,”came the reply. "I’m just finding out where his mouth is, so I can kick him in the nuts.”幽默简短的英语小故事篇14Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he re- quested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came run- ping up to him yelling, "Oscar! Oscar!I just saw someone driving off wit h your new Mercedes!”"Dear God! Did you try to stop him?""No,”she said,"I did better than that! I got the license plate number”幽默简短的英语小故事篇15A famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give aseries of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For thetask, he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sit in on the highlytechnical lectures. After several lectures, the driver commented to theeconomist, "You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I coulddeliver it myself." Theeconomist found this idea intriguing and decided toswitch places with him at his next lecture.The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some onein the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had noidea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, andthen replied, "That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it."幽默简短的英语小故事篇16The miserly millionaire ca lled a family conference, “ I’m placing a box of money in the attic,” he said.” When I die, I intend to grab it on my way up to heaven. See to it that no one touches it until it’s my time too go.”The family respected his wishes. After his death, the milli onaire’s wife looked in the attic. The box was still there. “ THE FOOL!” she said. ”I told him he should have put it in the basement.”。
幽默的英文小故事
幽默的英文小故事幽默的英文小故事(通用9篇)是不是总觉得学英语看阅读很烦躁?那是没有找到打开英语阅读的正确方式,下面,这些幽默的英文小故事,估计会让你爱上英文阅读。
幽默的英文小故事篇1As the years turn生日来临之际For her 82nd birthday,I surprised my grandmother with a birthday greeting signed by the President. (Upon request,this service is available to seniors over 80.)When I asked grandma how she felt receiving a card from the White House,she had a ready answer. "There's no privacy in this country any more,"she said. "They even keep track of your birthday. "我奶奶过82岁的生日时,我送给她一份惊奇的礼物—一张由总统签名的生日贺卡。
(根据规定,80岁以上的老年人可得到此项服务。
)当我问奶奶收到来自白宫的贺卡有何感想时,她毫不犹豫地回答说:“在这个国家,再也没有隐私了,他们就连你的生日都追踪着。
”幽默的英文小故事篇2Peer pressure同辈的压力My teen-age son,Chad,and nine of his friends came home one night with newly pierced ears. When his grandmother heard about it,she asked him why he did it.”Peerpressure," Chad told her.一天晚上,我十几岁的儿子查理,带着九个朋友回到家,他们都扎了耳朵眼儿。
英语幽默小故事14篇
Gardening Gloves For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an
allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you‘ll notice that my hands are bare." Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair of gardening gloves. 园艺手套 几个月以来,我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指,因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天,我正在 干园艺活时,丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说:“嗯,你肯定看到了,我的两手都是光光的。” 那天晚上,我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的.礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看:里面包着一双园艺手套。
英语幽默小故事 篇8
Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for seve Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wound Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."
一分钟英文幽默小故事(共8篇)
一分钟英文幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:一分钟英文幽默小故事 A hungry Fox found in a hollow tree a quantity of bread and meat, which some shepherds had placed there against their return.Delighted with his find he slipped in through the narrow aperture and greedily devoured it all.But when he tried to get out again he foundhimself so swollen after his big meal that he could not squeeze through the hole, and fell to whining and groaning over his misfortune.一分钟英文幽默小故事2:The Beauty of a ShabbyLittle DandelionSpring has e for the flowers and trees, in the forest and fields. Spring has also e on the wild flowers under the fence and on a small apple tree. There were red bursting flower buds hanging on the fresh apple tree branches.The apple Tree Branch held up his head and looked at many kinds of people who came in and out. They allshowed different reactions to the Apple Tree Branch.All the people reacted differently when they saw the Apple Tree branch. Some were expressionless without a word, some overpraised the beauty of the Apple Tree Branch, and others gazed at him with a satisfied look.Seeing these various reactions from people, the Apple Tree Branch realized that people have as diverse personalities as plants and flowers do and that they are all different. The Apple Tree branch looked at the fields and a garden through the open window. There were shabby flowers and plants as well as beautiful ones in the garden.'Those grasses are so pathetic. It's not theirfault they have such ugly and squalid names. However, everything is different in this world.' The apple Tree Branch sympathized and looked at the little flowers blooming next to the fields and streams.At that time, the Sun kissed the Apple Tree Branch, a dandelion in the field, the abundant beautiful flowers, and the shabby fl owers and said, “Yes, there is difference among everything, but throw away yourprejudice and look ahead with a broad point of view. What do you think the poorest plant is?” “A Dandelion. People do not use it even for a bouquet, and it is so mon that people trle it down carelessly. It is not different from a weed at all.”At that time, children ran across the field,rolled about on the lawn, and picked and kissed the dandelions. They made necklaces and garlands of them. They looked wonderful with the golden flowers and green stems.The seeds stuck to the stalks of the dandelions, and they were as beautiful as white feathers. When the children blew out with a puff, the seeds of the dandelions fluttered away as if they had wings.“Look at that! Now, do you und erstand how beautiful those flowers are, and how much pleasure they can give us?” The Sun said to the Apple Tree Branch. “They are only for children.” The Apple Tree Branch answered.At that time, an old lady dug in the ground of the field and picked the roots of the dandelions. She willmake tea, take it to the doctor who makes medicine,and earn money with the roots of the dandelions.“But, beauty is more valuable than those things. Only elected ones can join the Kingdom of Beauty. Not every plant can be the same, just as people can't be the same.” The Apple Tree Branch said.Later some people came into the room. The Countess who brought the Apple Tree Branch to the castle wasone of them. She brought a stalk of dandelion seeds much more carefully than when she brought the Apple Tree Branch.“Look at this. Isn't this beautiful? I will drawa picture of this dandelion with the apple tree branch. Everyone says that the apple tree branch is more beautiful, but this humble dandelion has a different kind of beauty. Even though the apple tree branch and the dandelion look different from each other, they are all beautiful.” The Countess said filled with admiration.The Sun smiled and kissed the shabby dandelion and the Apple Tree Branch. The Apple Tree Branch blushed his own petals with shame.篇2:一分钟英文幽默小故事 A long time ago, there lived a terrible king. The terrible king's wish was that all the people would shake in fear at the sound of his name. The terrible king made the lives of the people in the neighbor land ho rrible. “Here! Take everything!”The terrible king viciously took away all the belongings of the neighbor land. He even scared the poor women and children. The king was not even sorry to the children and women. The terrible king bothered the people of the neighbor land worse and worse everyday. The palace became more and more magnificent.“Put up a statue in the church!” Now theterrible king was ordering the church to place a statue of himself there. However, the ministers could not do that.“ Your majesty may be great, but God is even greater.”The terrible king was being angry. It was because he thought that he was the greatest in the whole world. Then the king was angry. “What! He is greater? Then I will defeat God.”In a loud voice, the terrible king said that he would win against God. That's why he ordered that a magnificent ship be built in order to go to the heaven. He said he would ride the ship to go and defeat God. The terrible king rode the ship up to heaven.From the sky, an angel was sent. However, the terrible king shot over a thousand bullets at the angel. “Ahhhhhh” Being shot, the angel was bleeding. The blood dropped unto the terrible king's ship. The angel's blood was so heavy that the king's ship sank.The terrible king became angry, again. “Build a more stronger ship.” The terrible king wanted abetter ship, so he ordered all the workers in his kingdom to build it. “I will defeat God for sure!”The terrible king went up to heaven, once more. God sent mosquitoes to the terrible king. The terribleking just laughed at the mosquitoes. “Go and bring me the best carpet.”The king made another mand. He thought that if he wrapped the carpet around his body the mosquitoes would not be able to bite him. But one mosquito went inside of the carpet. Because of that one mosquito, the terrible king was rolling around screaming. The terrible king that couldn't even catch one mosquito was a laughingstock for his troops.The Terrible King篇3:一分钟英语幽默小故事 Many ages had now passed away since the Phoenix had been seen in the world. At last he again appeared. Immediately al the different kinds of animals, both birds and beasts, flocked around him.篇4:一分钟英语幽默小故事 Christmas was ing .Mr Smith had no money to buy any presents for hischildren .His wife was ill and he spent a lot of money on her medicine .And the harvest was bad and all his family were going go be hungry the next spring .He was quite worried about it .“We had only a cock ,”said Mrs Smith oneday .“You’d better take it to the town .Sell it there and buy some cakes and sweets for ourchildren .”“It’s a good idea !”the man said and caught the cock the next morning and put it into a box .It was difficult to walk on the road covered with thicksnow .Two hours later he was very tied and wanted to have a rest .He put the box to the ground and sat down .“The air in the box must be close ,”the man said to himself .“I’d better let the cock walk outside for a while ,or it’ll die .”So he put the cock to the ground .When he started again ,he couldn’t catch it any lo nger .“How foolish you are !”Mr Smith called out angrily .“You can herald the break of day at night but you cann’t find the way to the town in the daytime !”篇6:英文短篇幽默小故事精选 Once there were lots of toys in a room. There was a saving box on thedresser, and it was a small piggy bank. The piggy bank was full of bronze, gold and silver coins.One night, the beautiful moonlight poured into the room through a window. The toys in the room were so happy. “Ladies and gentlemen, let's play together on this beautifu l night.” A baby doll with a red velvet ribbon said. “Okay. Let's play a game.” “After that, let's have a tea party.” “Wow, it will beexciting!” All the toys shouted for joy.“Hey, piggy bank! e on and join us. Let's enjoy the party.” “e on.” Everyone inv ited him to the party, but the piggy bank ignored their invitation. Therefore, the other toys enjoyed their party without the piggy bank.A rocking horse put on a knitting ball tail and danced. A rubber ball rolled over, and a toy car drove round everywhere in the room. Everyone seemed so happy.The piggy bank looked down at them playing and watched with an askance look. Then, the playing was over and the tea party began. The piggy bank couldn'tstand not eating when he saw the food, and he came closer step by step to the edge of the dresser.He smelled delicious cookies. He suddenly stuckhis head towards the toys gathered.“Clink!” The piggy bank fell down to the floor. When the piggy bank broke into pieces, the bronze, gold and silver coins inside of him scattered noisily.The other toys were surprised at the piggy bank's fall while they were enjoying the tea party. Everybody looked at the piggy bank with surprise. “Look at that poor piggy bank. He was always proud of himself.”“It's so sad. He could not even enjoy the party.”All the other toys felt sorry about the piggy bank.篇7:英文幽默哲理小故事英文幽默哲理小故事1、如今我要表现得像一位女士One day womens dresses were on sale at a department store. A dignified middle-aged man decided to pick a dress for his wife, but soon he found himself being battered by frantic women.一天,一家百货公司的女装大减价,一位高贵的中年男士想给他的太太挑选一件女装。
英语幽默短故事带翻译
聪明的理发师
很久以前,在一个小村庄,有一位非常受欢迎的理发师,因为他的机智和幽默。一天,有个人来他的理发店理发。理发师给他刮胡子的时候,他们开始聊天。那个人提到他第二天要去罗马。理发师开玩笑地回答说:“在罗马小心点。那里的理发师很糟糕,他们会让你的脸上到处都是划痕和伤痕!”那个人笑了笑,付了钱,然后走了。
"Because he's a liar. He didn't do any of that stuff."
Translation:
会说话的狗
一个人看到房子前面的牌子上写着:“出售会说话的狗。”他按了门铃,主人告诉他狗在后院。那人走进后院,问狗:“你会说话吗?”
“是的,”狗回答说。
“那么,你有什么故事?”
Title: Funny Short Stories in English with Translation
English幽默短故事带翻译
1. The Clever Barber
Long ago, in a small village, there was a barber who was very popular for his wit and humor. One day, a man came to his shop for a shave. As the barber was giving him a shave, they started chatting. The man mentioned that he was going to Rome the next day. The barber jokingly replied, "Be careful in Rome. They have terrible barbers there, they will leave your face full of cuts and bruises!" The man laughed and paid for his shave, then left.
关于英文笑话故事5篇_英语的笑话故事简短
关于英文笑话故事5篇_英语的笑话故事简短关于英文笑话故事5篇关于英文笑话故事篇一alieMom:"Whichbananadoyouwant,Victor"Victor:"Iwantthatoneofthegr eatet."Mom:"Victor,youhouldbepolite,tohavethatlittleone."Victor: "Mom,Imutlietobepolite"妈妈:“你要哪一只香蕉,维克多”维克多:“我要那只最大的。
”妈妈:“维克多,你应该懂礼貌,要那只小的。
”维克多:“妈妈,难道懂礼貌就必须说谎吗”关于英文笑话故事篇二TwoBird两只鸟Teacher:Herearetwobird,oneiawallow,theotheriparrow.Nowwhocantell uwhichiwhichStudent:IcannotpointoutbutIknowtheanwer.Teacher:Plea etellu.Student:Thewallowibeidetheparrowandtheparrowibeidethewall ow.老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。
谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
老师:请说说看。
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
关于英文笑话故事篇三WhoItheLaziet谁最懒Father:Well,Tom,Iakedtoyourteachertoday,andnowIwanttoakyouaqueti on.WhoithelazietperoninyourclaTom:Idon"tknow,father.Father:Oh,ye,youdo!Think!Whenotherboyandgirlaredoingandwriting,whoitinthecla andonlywatchehowotherpeopleworkTom:Ourteacher,father.父亲:哎,汤姆,今天我跟你们老师谈过,现在我想问你个问题。
英语幽默小故事6篇
1、Good use of cry 哭的妙用The parents with their three-year-old son went to see film.When they walked into the cinema, the attendant said to them,“you’ll have to go out if your son cries. But we’ll refundyou the tickets.” About half an hour later, the husbandasked his wife, “What do you think of the film?”“I’ve never seen such a boring film.” His wife answered.“It’s not worth seeing.”“I don’t think much of it, either.” The husband said.“Wake the child up and let him cry.”一对夫妇带着他们3岁的儿子去看电影。
进电影院时,服务员对他们说:“如果你们的儿子哭了,你们就得出去。
不过我们会给你们退票的。
”大约半个小时以后,丈夫对妻子说:“你觉得这电影怎么样?”“我从没看过这么没劲的电影。
”妻子回答说,“真不值得看。
”“我也不喜欢看。
”丈夫说:“叫醒孩子,让他哭。
”2、What a Smart Wife家有笨妻A newly married woman was sitting on a chair,looking vexed, when her husband came home."What's up? Why do you look so troubled?"the husband asked. The woman replied,"I'm so sorry. I was ironing your new suit andburned a hole in your trousers." And the man said,"That's all right. I have another pair that is exactly the same.""Thank God you do. I used it to mend this pair,"the wife responded.有一个刚结婚的太太,坐在椅子那边,看起来很懊恼,她先生回家看到她这个样子,就问:‘嗨,你怎么啦?为什么看起来这么懊恼呢?’太太说:‘很抱歉,你那件新做的西装裤被我烫坏了,烫成一个洞了。
幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的
幽默英语小故事16篇笑死人的在小学英语教学期间,英语小故事能够为学生的学习提供良好的背景。
幽默英语小故事有哪些呢?本文是店铺整理的幽默英语小故事16篇,欢迎阅读。
幽默英语小故事1.Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.慎重许愿一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。
他们恰好在同一天出生。
庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。
她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。
妻子想周游世界。
仙女招了招手。
“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。
接下来该丈夫许愿了。
英语幽默的小故事
英语幽默的小故事(实用版)编制人:__________________审核人:__________________审批人:__________________编制单位:__________________编制时间:____年____月____日序言下载提示:该文档是本店铺精心编制而成的,希望大家下载后,能够帮助大家解决实际问题。
文档下载后可定制修改,请根据实际需要进行调整和使用,谢谢!并且,本店铺为大家提供各种类型的实用范文,如学习资料、英语资料、学生作文、教学资源、求职资料、创业资料、工作范文、条据文书、合同协议、其他范文等等,想了解不同范文格式和写法,敬请关注!Download tips: This document is carefully compiled by this editor. I hope that after you download it, it can help you solve practical problems. The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!In addition, this shop provides various types of practical sample essays, such as learning materials, English materials, student essays, teaching resources, job search materials, entrepreneurial materials, work examples, documents, contracts, agreements, other essays, etc. Please pay attention to the different formats and writing methods of the model essay!英语幽默的小故事英语幽默的小故事5篇其实对于某一些重点的学校,又或者是与国外建立起了友好交流关系的学校,只有那些具有优势英语的学生才有可能会被录取并参加国外友好学校的交流活动下面是本店铺为大家整理的英语幽默的小故事,如果大家喜欢可以分享给身边的朋友。
三分钟英语幽默小故事三篇
【导语】⼀些幽默的英语故事,能提⾼我们阅读英语的兴趣,从⽽提⾼英语的阅读能⼒。
下⾯是分享的三分钟英语幽默⼩故事三篇。
欢迎阅读参考! 三分钟英语幽默⼩故事篇⼀ 推理a fourth-grade teacher was diving her pupils a lesson in logic.”here is the situation,"she said.”a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river,fishing. he loses his balance,falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.his wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. why do you think she ran to the bank?"⼩学四年级的教师在给学⽣们讲逻辑学。
“有这样⼀种情况。
”她说:“⼀个男⼈站在河中⼼的⼀条船上钓鱼。
他突然失去重⼼,掉进了⽔⾥。
于是,他开始挣扎并呼喊救命。
他的妻⼦听到了他的喊声,知道他不会游泳,所以她就急忙跑向bank。
请你们告诉我这是为什么?”a girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"⼀个⼥学⽣举起⼿答道:“是不是去取他的存钱?” 三分钟英语幽默⼩故事篇⼆ 训兽童a boy of about ten was sitting on a city bus with a briefcase on his lap. periodically the youngster would whisper into his coat.a woman passenger caught his eye with a quizzical look and,in response,the boy produced a small white mouse from his shirt pocket.”he's just a baby."explained the youngster. "his parents are in here. "opening his briefcase,he brought forth a pair of slightly larger. white mice from among a dozen or so that scurried around inside. by this time several other passengers had formed an audience, and the boy patiently explained his interest in mice,how to take care of them, their eating habits, their different personalities and so on.⼀位⼗岁的男孩腿上放着会⽂箱,正坐在⼀辆城市公共汽车上。
简单搞笑的英语小故事
简单搞笑的英语小故事(经典版)编制人:__________________审核人:__________________审批人:__________________编制单位:__________________编制时间:____年____月____日序言下载提示:该文档是本店铺精心编制而成的,希望大家下载后,能够帮助大家解决实际问题。
文档下载后可定制修改,请根据实际需要进行调整和使用,谢谢!并且,本店铺为大家提供各种类型的经典范文,如职场文书、合同协议、总结报告、演讲致辞、规章制度、自我鉴定、应急预案、教学资料、作文大全、其他范文等等,想了解不同范文格式和写法,敬请关注!Download tips: This document is carefully compiled by this editor. I hope that after you download it, it can help you solve practical problems. The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!Moreover, our store provides various types of classic sample essays for everyone, such as workplace documents, contract agreements, summary reports, speeches, rules and regulations, self-assessment, emergency plans, teaching materials, essay summaries, other sample essays, etc. If you want to learn about different sample essay formats and writing methods, please stay tuned!简单搞笑的英语小故事简单搞笑的英语小故事(通用9篇)有很多孩子都喜欢听英语故事,特别是一些简单又很搞笑的小故事是很受欢迎的。
简单幽默英语小笑话 (细选3篇)
简单幽默英语小笑话(细选3篇)简单幽默英语小笑话1There once was a young couple who lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors' houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.So one day the wife went to the pet store and said, “I need a good guard dog.”And the clerk replied, “Sorry, we're all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he knows karate.”The wife didn't believe him so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair.”The dog went up to the chair and broke it into pieces, then he said to the dog, “Karate that table.” The dog went up to the table and broke it in half.So the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a big guard dog. But then she told her husband that it knew karate, and he said “Karate my ass!”简单幽默英语小笑话2Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"The first kid says, "A circumcision."And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"简单幽默英语小笑话3Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.Hot Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.Flabby Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with thesenew, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too-muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.Bunion Barbie. Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.No-More-Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.Mid-life Cr Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal trainer)is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B别睡在庙里,因为跑得了和尚跑不了庙!初恋防震最佳,因为爱情像雨像雾又像风。
英语幽默小故事10篇
英语幽默小故事10篇【引言】学习英语的过程中,阅读幽默小故事不仅能够提高我们的语言能力,还能让我们在轻松愉快的氛围中领略到英语文化的魅力。
下面,就让我们一起来欣赏10篇英语幽默小故事,并在快乐中学习吧!【故事1】Once upon a time, there was a man named Jack who had a peculiar habit of always forgetting his keys.One day, he locked himself out of his house again.Instead of calling a locksmith, he decided to break into his own house through the window.As he was climbing in, he suddenly realized that he had left his keys inside the house!幽默点:Jack忘记带钥匙的习惯以及他试图通过窗户进入自己家的荒谬行为让人捧腹大笑。
【故事2】Mike was a terrible cook.One day, he decided to make dinner for his girlfriend.He spent hours in the kitchen, and when he finally served the meal, it was completely inedible.His girlfriend asked him, "What did you make?" Mike replied, "Well, it"s not quite soup, and it"s not quite stew, but you can call it "soupstew"!"幽默点:Mike的创新菜名“soupstew”让人忍俊不禁,体现了他的幽默感。
英语幽默小故事带翻译
安妮:亲爱的,一点也不,不管是谁留给你钱,我都会爱你。
故事三:The Blind Man(盲人)
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing-eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head.
经理跑过去问那个男人,“你在干什么?!”
盲人回答,“我只是想看看周围。”
故事四:The Art of Conversation(交谈的艺术)
Teacher: “Can anyone give me three points of similarity between a giraffe and a refrigerator?”
英语幽默小故事带翻译
故事一:The Interview(面试)
John went for an interview at a big company. After the interview, the HR manager said, “You are very suitable for the job. But I'm afraid you won't be able to start until Monday.”
The manager runs up to the man and asks, “What are you doing?!”
The blind man responds, “Just looking around.”
翻译:一个盲人带着导盲犬走进一家商店。突然间,他抓起狗的牵引绳开始把狗甩到头顶上。
英语小笑话带翻译
英语小笑话带翻译英语小笑话带翻译(精选12篇)笑话具有篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。
下面是店铺为大家整理的关于英语的小笑话带翻译,欢迎大家的阅读。
英语小笑话带翻译篇1He is really somebody-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.-- He is really somebody. What does he do?-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.他真是一个大人物-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。
-- 他真是一个大人物。
干什么的?-- 墓地守墓人。
英语小笑话带翻译篇2Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。
在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。
英语幽默小故事10篇
英语幽默小故事10篇摘要:1.英语幽默小故事概述2.故事1:聪明的狗3.故事2:迟到的理由4.故事3:误解的笑话5.故事4:幸运的数字6.故事5:咖啡店的对决7.故事6:调皮的孙子8.故事7:语言障碍9.故事8:购物趣事10.故事9:意外的礼物11.故事10:简单的幸福12.总结:英语幽默小故事的启示正文:【英语幽默小故事概述】在这个世界上,幽默无处不在,英语幽默小故事更是让人忍俊不禁。
这里,我们为您精心准备了10篇英语幽默小故事,它们涵盖了日常生活、工作和人际交往等多个方面,不仅让您在轻松愉快的氛围中学习英语,还能领悟到人生哲理。
接下来,让我们一一领略这些故事的魅力吧!【故事1:聪明的狗】一天,一位主人带着他的狗去散步。
突然,狗发现了一个美味的骨头,于是它决定偷偷拿走。
主人发现了狗的意图,于是对它说:“如果你能用英语告诉我这个骨头的价值,我就让你拿走。
”狗想了想,用英语回答:“This bone is worth a lot.”主人听后笑了笑,把骨头给了狗。
这个故事告诉我们,学习英语是有好处的。
【故事2:迟到的理由】一个人因为迟到被同事嘲笑,他解释说:“我今天起床后发现家里的钟停了,所以我以为是早上7点。
结果,我以最快的速度赶到公司,结果还是迟到了。
”这个故事告诉我们,有时候,迟到的理由也能带来幽默。
【故事3:误解的笑话】一位外国游客在中国餐馆点了一份“狗不理包子”,结果服务员端上来一盘狗肉。
游客大怒,喊道:“我点的不是狗肉,是狗不理包子!”这个故事告诉我们,语言误解会导致笑话。
【故事4:幸运的数字】一位迷信的同事对公司里的每个人都说:“我的车牌号是168,意味着一路发,所以今天我一定会走运。
”结果,当天他出了车祸。
有人问他:“你的车牌号不是意味着一路发吗?怎么还会出车祸?”他回答:“是啊,可是我忘了,168还意味着一路傻瓜。
”【故事5:咖啡店的对决】一位顾客在咖啡店点了一杯咖啡,服务员问他:“您要加糖吗?”顾客回答:“不用,我已经够甜了。
英文短篇幽默故事份
英文短篇幽默故事(8)份英文短篇幽默故事 1It was the Christmas season and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner, “What is your offense?”圣诞佳节到来,法__情愉悦地问犯人:“你做了什么坏事啊?”“I did my Christmas shopping early this year,” cried the prisoner.“我今年圣诞节购物早了些”犯人回答。
“There's nothing wrong with that,” said the Judge. How early were you doing this shopping?”“这么做没错啊,”法官说:“到底多早之前啊?““Before the store opened, ”answere d the prisoner.“商店开门之前“犯人答道。
英文短篇幽默故事 2The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctorremembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.“How old are you?" he said."Eighteen, sir," said John."But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?""Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."第二次__开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。
英语小幽默(热门46篇)
英语小幽默(热门46篇)写写帮会员为你精心整理了46篇《英语小幽默》的范文,但愿对你的工作学习带来帮助,希望你能喜欢!篇一:英语幽默小故事Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them.The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。
学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”“假如那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。
”“该发明的都已经被发明出来了。
”篇二:英语幽默小故事The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time.Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money.Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Workdone.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
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简短幽默的英语小故事
篇一
Golfing with cows
A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
一个男人摇摇晃晃地走进了急诊室,两个眼睛是青的,颈项上有明显的五指印。
Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows.
医生问他发生了什么。
“额,是这样的,”这个人说。
“我和我老婆来了几局高尔夫,她把球打到一个牛群里。
”
"We went to look for it and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.
“我们去寻这个球,我四下搜索,发觉一头牛的屁股后面有个白色的东西。
”
"I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball -- stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my mistake."
“我走过去,举起了它的尾巴想看清晰,我老婆的球就卡在牛的屁股中间。
然后我犯了一个错误。
”
"What did you do?" asks the doctor.
“你干嘛了?”医生问。
"Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey,
this looks like yours!'"
“额,我举起了牛的尾巴,对我老婆喊道,'这个好像是你的!'”
篇二
Hen House
The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house out the back of the parish rectory. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.
在一个小小的爱尔兰村庄中,牧师非常地喜爱鸡舍中的小鸡。
鸡
舍位于教区后面,里面有一只公鸡,十只母鸡。
One Saturday night the cock rooster was missing and the priest suspected that it was because cock fights were being held in the village. So he decided to do something about it
at church the next morning.
不过,公鸡在一个星期六的晚上不见了,牧师怀疑可能是因为村
里举办了斗鸡竞赛。
他谋划在第二天早晨去教堂做些事情。
At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?" All the men stood up.
当着大家的面,他问道:“谁有一只公鸡吗?”所有的男人都站
了起来。
"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has
anybody seen a cock?" All the women stood up.
“不是的,”他说,“我不是那个意思,有谁见到过一只公鸡吗?”所有的女人都站了起来。
"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has
anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?" Half the women stood up.
“不是的!”他说,“我不是那个意思。
有谁见过一只不属于自
己的公鸡吗?”半数的女人站了起来。
"No, No," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has
anybody seen my cock?" All the altar boys stood up.
“不是的。
”他说,“我也不是那个意思。
有谁见过我的公鸡吗?”所有的侍者男孩都站了起来。
篇三
Stolen Turkey
Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I stole this turkey to feed my family. Would you take it and settle my guilt?"
布莱恩抱着一只火鸡,非常苦恼,他说:“原谅我,神父,我有罪。
我偷来这只火鸡给我家人吃。
你能告慰我的罪吗”
"Certainly not," said the Priest. "As penance, you must return it to the one from whom you stole it."
“当然不行,”神父说。
“你必须把它还回去,这样才能赎罪。
”
"I tried," Brian sobbed, "but he refused. Oh, Father, what should I do?"
“我试过了。
”布莱恩抽泣着,“但是他拒绝了。
神父,我到底
该怎么办呢?”
"If what you say is true, then it is all right for you to keep it for your family."
“假如你说的是真的,那你就留着它吧。
”
Thanking the Priest, Brian hurried off.
谢过了神父,布莱恩跑开了。
When confession was over, the Priest returned to his residence. When he walked into the kitchen, he found that someone had stolen his turkey.
告诫会结束后,神父回到住处。
当他走到厨房的时候,他发觉火鸡不见了。