幽默用英语说范文
英语幽默演讲稿范文
Good evening! I am thrilled to be here with you tonight to share alittle humor with you all. As we all know, laughter is the best medicine, and I'm here to prescribe a generous dose of it to your evenings. So,let's get ready to chuckle and maybe even learn a thing or two along the way.Title: "The Joys of Miscommunication"---First off, let me introduce you to the "language of love." Have you ever tried to say "I love you" in a foreign language? It's quite the adventure! For instance, in Spanish, you say "Te quiero." But what ifyou're not very good at Spanish, and you say "Te querio"? Suddenly, your love is no longer romantic; it's just a silly mistake. So, remember, when in doubt, stick to English!---Now, let's talk about technology. Have you ever had a text conversation that went something like this?Me: "How's your day going?"Friend: "It's going well, just got back from the gym. What about you?"Me: "I'm just chilling. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you, I just got a new gym membership."Friend: "Wait, what? You're chilling at the gym? How does that even work?"Oh, the joy of miscommunication! It's like trying to bake a cake without the recipe. You might end up with something... interesting.---Let's not forget about cooking. Have you ever tried to follow a recipe, only to find out that you've been using the wrong ingredients? I have. One time, I was making a cake, and I thought I needed flour. But I accidentally used baking powder instead. The result? A cake that was aslight as a feather and as sweet as a breeze. My friends were baffled, and I had to resort to explaining the science of leavening.---And then there's the age-old tale of the "hard of hearing" relative. You know, the one who says "I can hear you, I just don't understand whatyou're saying." It's like they're playing a game of charades, but the only catch is, they can't see the clues. So, you end up repeating yourself, and eventually, you just give up and ask them to read the subtitles.---Now, let's talk about travel. Have you ever tried to order food in a foreign country and ended up with something completely different from what you expected? I once ordered a "fish and chips" in the Netherlands, and what did I get? A fish and... well, it wasn't chips. It was something that looked like a chip, but it was actually a fried piece of... bread. I kid you not. So, when in doubt, just point to the pictures. It's better than trying to explain "chips" in Dutch.---In conclusion, my friends, life is full of miscommunication, and that's what makes it so funny. Whether it's a language barrier, a technology glitch, a cooking disaster, or a travel mishap, we can all find humor in our everyday struggles. So, let's embrace the miscommunication, because without it, where would we be without our good laughs?Thank you, and remember, life's a joke, and we're all in on it!---And that's all for now, folks. Keep smiling, keep laughing, and keep miscommunicating. It's what makes us human.。
搞笑故事英文作文短篇范文
搞笑故事英文作文短篇范文A Funny Story。
Once upon a time, there was a man named Tom who loved to play pranks on his friends. One day, he decided to play a trick on his best friend, Jack.Tom invited Jack to his house for a barbecue. Jack arrived at Tom's house, and they started to grill some burgers and hot dogs. While they were cooking, Tom secretly put a whoopee cushion on Jack's chair.As they sat down to eat, Jack sat on the cushion, and it made a loud farting noise. Tom burst out laughing, but Jack was not amused. He thought it was rude and disrespectful.Tom realized he had gone too far, so he apologized to Jack and promised never to play a prank on him again. Jack forgave him, and they continued to enjoy their barbecue.However, the next day, Jack decided to get revenge on Tom. He bought a fake spider and put it in Tom's bed while he was sleeping.When Tom woke up and saw the spider, he screamed and jumped out of bed. Jack was hiding around the corner, laughing uncontrollably.Tom realized that he had been pranked, and he couldn't help but laugh too. From that day on, they both agreed to only play harmless pranks on each other.In the end, Tom and Jack's friendship grew stronger because of their shared love for humor and laughter. They continued to play pranks on each other, but always with good intentions and without causing harm.In conclusion, humor and laughter are important parts of life, and playing pranks on friends can be a fun way to bond. However, it's important to always consider the other person's feelings and not take things too far.。
国外英语幽默演讲稿范文
Good evening! It’s a great pleasure to stand before you today and share with you some English humor. As you know, humor is a universal language that can bring people together from different cultures and backgrounds. So, let’s have a good laugh and enjoy the beauty of humor together!First, let me tell you a story about my cat. My cat is a very smart and curious creature. One day, I came home from work and found that my cat had climbed onto the kitchen counter. On the counter, there was a bowl of spaghetti. Without hesitation, my cat reached out and took a big bite of the spaghetti. I was so surprised that I couldn’t help but laugh. I said to my cat, “You know, you can eat your cat food, but spaghetti is not for cats!” The cat looked at me with a confused e xpression and then took another bite. I couldn’t resist laughing and said, “Alright, I guess you’re on a diet today.”Now, let’s move on to a joke about the English language. Did you know that English is the most difficult language to learn? Why? Because it has more than 40 different ways to spell the same sound! For example, the word “ough” can be pronounced asough, augh, ow, o, or even just a silent “gh.” Here’s a joke to illustrate this point:Why do we use “ough” in English?Because once you fight with a dough, you have to cough up what you dough!And now, let’s have a joke about the weather. The weather is always a popular topic for humor. Here’s a joke that will make you laugh:Why don’t we ever see penguins in Australia?Because they’re too busy down under!Moving on, let’s talk about technology. How many of you have ever experienced the frustration of trying to use a touch screen with gloves on? Here’s a joke that will make you chuckle:Why did the touch screen and the glove have a fight?Because the screen was trying to swipe left, but the glove kept swiping right!Now, let’s have a joke about ourselves. We all have those moments when we feel like we’re in a comedy of errors. Here’s a joke that will remind you of those moments:Why don’t we ever trust mirrors?Because they’re always trying to make us look thinner!And finally, let me leave you with a joke that will make you think about how lucky we are to be here tonight:Why don’t we ever see actors at the gym?Because they’re always on a break!Ladies and gentlemen, I hope you enjoyed these jokes and found them entertaining. Remember, humor is a great way to connect with others and make the world a better place. So, let’s keep spreading laughter and joy!Thank you for your attention, and have a great evening!。
幽默作文英语60字
幽默作文英语60字Humor is an essential part of life. It brings joy, lightens the mood, and helps us cope with difficult situations. Imagine a world without humor, how dull and boring it would be!One day, a man walked into a bar with a duck on his head. The bartender looked at him and said, "Hey, what'swith the duck?" The man replied, "Oh, this is my lucky duck. Whenever I have him on my head, I always win at poker." The bartender chuckled and said, "Well, let's put it to thetest then."They sat down at a table and started playing poker.Sure enough, every hand the man won, with the duck sitting happily on his head. The bartender was amazed and asked, "How did you train the duck to help you win at poker?" The man replied, "Oh, it's simple. Whenever I have a good hand, I give him a little nod, and he quacks. If I have a bad hand, he stays silent."The bartender couldn't believe it and decided to try it out for himself. He borrowed the duck and sat down to play. But no matter how hard he tried, the duck remained silent. Frustrated, the bartender asked the man, "What's wrong with this duck? Why isn't he helping me win?" The man just shrugged and said, "Oh, I forgot to tell you. The duck is also an excellent bluffer."The bartender couldn't help but laugh at the clever joke. Humor truly has a way of bringing people together and making even the most mundane situations entertaining. So, next time you're feeling down or stressed, remember to add a little humor to your day. It might just be the remedy you need.。
英文三分钟搞笑演讲
英文三分钟搞笑演讲英语演讲，也可以很风趣很幽默的，想知道怎么写好英文的搞笑演讲稿吗?下面是店铺为你整理的几篇英文三分钟搞笑演讲，希望能帮到你哟。
英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇一A helping handA man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand.He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down."Is this yours?" he asked.She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed.On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I'm about to have dinner. There's plenty. Would you like to join me?"He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I've had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?"The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?""No," she replied, "Only those who catch my eye."英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇二Good morning teachers and fellow students. Today we would like to introduce a few favorite books to you.My favorite book is (Italian: Cuore). This is a diary written by an Italian boy Enrico. The diary is about his life and study. It included various touching stories that happened around Enrico,the mottos taught by his parents, as well as the wonderful ten "monthly" stories told by his teacher during the class. Every word in the chapter describes the word "love". From patriotism to friendship, and to the love between parents and child -- really touching.This novel taught me how to love, and how to learn from love.I really like this book very much. How about you? What is your favorite book?My favorite book is . Have you read it before?Oh, I haven t read this book before. What is it about?Well, it is a story of a rich girl who maintained her noble character after the bankruptcy of her father. The story is happy ending.Can you tell us why you love this book so much?Sure. It is because the story taught us to be brave and to face the challenges and difficulties with courage. I am deeply impressed by the strength and perseverance of the little princess in the story. I have decided to learn from her from now on.Oh I see, the story sounds very good. I cannot wait to read this book as well.英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇三Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."。
用英语作文形容一个人幽默风趣
用英语作文形容一个人幽默风趣英文回答：A humorous individual is a magnetic personality who effortlessly evokes laughter and joy in others. They possess a unique ability to observe the world through a comedic lens, weaving wit, irony, and absurdity into their interactions. Their infectious laughter and playful spirit spread like wildfire, creating an atmosphere of lightheartedness and cheer.Humor serves as a coping mechanism for the humorous individual, allowing them to navigate life's challenges with a dash of levity. They can turn mundane situationsinto comedic masterpieces, finding humor in the most unexpected places. Their quick wit and sharp retorts keep conversations lively and engaging, making them the life of the party.Beyond their own amusement, humorous individuals spreadlaughter to those around them. They are masters of storytelling, captivating audiences with tales that blend fact and fiction, exaggeration, and understatement. Their infectious laughter invites others to join in, fostering a sense of camaraderie and shared amusement.The humor of these individuals is not merely a superficial trait; it reflects a deep appreciation for the absurdity of life. They embrace the imperfections of the human condition, poking fun at themselves and others with a gentle touch. Their humor is never malicious or hurtful, but rather a celebration of the funny side of life.中文回答：幽默风趣的人。
英语作文范文80词左右搞笑幽默
英语作文范文80词左右搞笑幽默英文回答：My dear friend, I'm so sorry to hear about your recent breakup. You deserve all the happiness in the world, andI'm sure you'll find someone who deserves your love and affection. In the meantime, please know that I'm here for you if you need anything. I'm always happy to lend an ear, offer a shoulder to cry on, or just provide some much-needed comic relief.Remember, laughter is the best medicine. So here are a few funny jokes to help you get through this tough time:Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!What do you call a fish with no eyes?Fsh!Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?In case he got a hole-in-one!I hope these jokes have brought a smile to your face. And remember, you're not alone. We're all here for you, and we'll get through this together.中文回答：亲爱的朋友，得知你最近分手，我深感遗憾。
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇）演讲稿是一种实用性比较强的文稿，是为演讲准备的书面材料。
在现在的社会生活中，演讲稿对我们的作用越来越大，那么你有了解过演讲稿吗？以下是小编收集整理的幽默搞笑的.英语演讲稿范文（通用6篇），希望能够帮助到大家。
幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿1Dear teachers and schoolmates:I’m very happy to give a lecture in English here today. The title of speech is I Love English. As everyone knows,English is very important today.It has been used everywhere in the world.It has become the most common language on Internet and for international trade. If we can speak English well,we will have more chance to succeed.Because more and more people have taken notice of it,the number of the people who go to learn English has increased at a high speed. But for myself,I learn English not only because of its importance and its usefulness,but also because of my love for it.When I learn English, I can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.When I read English novels,I can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.When I speak English, I can feel the confident from my words.When I write English,I can see the beauty which is not the same as our Chinese… I love English,it gives me a colorful dream.I hope I can travel around the world one day. With my good English, I can make friends with many people from different contries.I can see many places of great intrests.I dream that I can go to London,because it is the birth place of English. I also want to use my good English to introduce our great places to the English spoken people,I hopethat they can love our country like us.I know, Rome was not built in a day. I believe that after continuous hard study, one day I can speak English very well. If you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. So I believe as I love English everyday , it will love me too. I am sure that I will realize my dream one day! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿2Good morning/afternoon!First thing first, I gotta say,wow,its funny thing to be given a chance like that.Trurh be told,I really got a little bit nervous before I stand right here ,so called stage fright.If you look specifically on me .You may find my hands shaking,pretty assembles the guy who suffered from Pakinsons disease,and legs wobbling ,like I caught so-called ball leg. Okay,lets stop going around the bush and get back to my topic today.I really like to talk a funny story I have just heard.A lady called Lucy emigrated to United States several years ago.Her spoken English is not that fluent .And one day,she is just sitting on the couch with his U.S friends Mandy watching Sit-Com.A noise of bump had the attention of Mandy,which led her to go out of the house trying to figure out what had happened.Can you imagine that Mandy go straight out with merely a sweater.So Lucy shouted at her,"Lucy ,turn your clothes on." What suprised her most,beyond her wildest imagination, is that almost all the male in this country took their head out of the window.Admittedly,Lucy made a mistake here .The word spitted means Mandy is totally naked to the reason that male looked out of the window.The right sentence shall be,"put your clothing on."The story inspires you to take a careful look on the vast difference between eastern and western culture.Thats full of it,thank you for your time!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿3Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold night.Today my topic is about choice and process.A research shows that a man has to make 73 choices one day.With so many choices one day, people easily get so confused and afraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true part of life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than the choice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life, which the process makes the difference.Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gump made no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with his strong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudes and feelings ,the caution, courage and persistance we have as we encounter new experience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed my major when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh for me.I cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closely related to mathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief that this is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,I persisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my life. Gradually I could understand some parts and even found maths interesting.Moreover, I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,the choice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the past four months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.No matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, your potential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress will come to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can you see it.These make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong for me to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain and enjoy this fantastic experience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy the process. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after you chose to come here.Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿4Mary was an English girl, but she lived in Rome. She was six years old. Last year her mother said to her, “You’re six years old now, Mary, and you’re going to begin going to a school here. You’re going to like it very much, because it’s a nice school.”“Is it an English school” Mary asked.” Yes, it is,” her mother said. Mary went to the school, and enjoyed her lessons. Her mother always took her to school in the morning and brought her home in the afternoon. Last Monday her mother went to the school at 4 o’clock, and Mary ran out of her class. “We’ve got a new girl in our class today, Mummy,” she said. “She’s six years old too, and she’s very nice, but she isn’t English. She’s German.” “Does she speak English” Mary’s mother asked.” No, but she laughs in English,” Mary said happily.幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿5Ladies and Gentlemen , Good afternoon! I68m very glad tostand here and give you a short speech. today my topic is “youth”. I hope you will like it , and found the importance in your youth so that more cherish it.First I want to ask you some questions: 1、Do you know what is youth? 2、 How do you master your youth?YouthYouth is not a time of life, it is a state of mind it is not rosy cheeks , red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the emotions : it is the freshness it is the freshness of the deep springs of life .Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite , for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20 . Nobody grows old merely by a number of years . We grow old by deserting our ideals.Years wrinkle the skin , but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul . Worry , fear , self –distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust .Whether 60 of 16 , there is in every human being 67s heart the lure of wonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what68s next and the joy of the game of living . In the center of your heart and my heart there68s a wireless station : so long as it receives messages of beauty , hope ,cheer, courage and power from men and from the infinite, so long as you are young .When the aerials are down , and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old ,even at 20 , but as long as your aerials are up ,to catch waves of optimism , there is hope you may die young at 80.That68s all ! Thank you!幽默搞笑的英语演讲稿6Earn english not only because of its importance and itsusefulness,but also because of my love for it.when i learn english, i can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the world.when i read english novels,i can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the translation.when i speak english, i can feel the confident from my words.when i write english,i can see the beauty which is not the same as our chinese...I love english,it gives me a colorful dream.i hope i can travel around the world one day. with my good english, i can make friends with many people from different contries.i can see many places of great intrests.i dream that i can go to london,because it is the birth place of english.I also want to use my good english to introduce our great places to the english spoken people,i hope that they can love our country like us.I know, rome was not built in a day. i believe that after continuous hard study, one day i can speak english very well. if you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. so i believe as i love english everyday , it will love me too.I am sure that i will realize my dream one day!Thank you!。
幽默的交流发言稿范文英语
Good morning! It's a great pleasure to stand here and share some thoughts with you all. Today, I want to talk about something that often brings joy and laughter to our lives – humor. Yes, humor! It's that magical ingredient that can turn a boring day into an unforgettable one.Let's start with a little story. Do you remember the time when your friend accidentally called you "dog" instead of "brother"? Or how about that time when your colleague spilled coffee all over their shirt in the middle of a meeting? These moments, filled with humor, are the ones we cherish and remember for a lifetime.Now, let's talk about why humor is so important in our lives. Firstly,it helps us cope with stress. Life can be tough, and sometimes we need a good laugh to keep us going. Humor is a powerful tool that can lighten our spirits and make us feel better about ourselves and the world around us.Secondly, humor brings people together. When we share a laugh, it creates a sense of camaraderie and unity. It's a universal language that can bridge the gap between different cultures, backgrounds, and personalities. So, next time you meet someone new, why not share a joke or two to break the ice?But let's not forget that humor can also be a bit risky. Sometimes, we might cross the line and unintentionally offend someone. So, here are a few tips on how to be funny without offending others:1. Know your audience: Different people have different senses of humor. Before you share a joke, make sure it's appropriate for the situation and the people around you.2. Be inclusive: Avoid jokes that target specific groups or individuals. Remember, humor should be inclusive and respectful to everyone.3. Keep it light: Humor is meant to be fun and light-hearted. Don't dwell on controversial or sensitive topics.4. Be genuine: People can tell when you're trying too hard to be funny. Be yourself and let your true personality shine through.Now, let me share a few humorous anecdotes to get us started:1. Did you know that when you dream, you're the main character? In reality, you're the supporting actor in everyone else's dreams.2. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!3. Did you ever wonder why dogs like to eat grass? It's because they're just trying to get a "lawn-mower" moment!And here's a classic one: Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!Ladies and gentlemen, humor is a gift that we should all cherish and share. So, let's make an effort to incorporate more laughter into our lives. Whether it's through a joke, a funny meme, or a witty comment,let's spread joy and happiness wherever we go.In conclusion, humor is a powerful tool that can bring us closer together, relieve stress, and make life more enjoyable. So, let's embrace our inner comedians and share a laugh with the world!Thank you for listening, and may your day be filled with laughter and joy!。
三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文
三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文在中国英语作为一门外语拥有最多的外语学习者，英语演讲已成为我们生活中必不可少的一部分,并且能有效地帮助我们发展语言应用及交际能力。
下面是店铺为你整理的几篇三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文，希望能帮到你哟。
三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇一once upon a time, a weenie ant was walking on his way. as he was walking, suddenly he felt the ground shaking terribly. he looked around with his paranoid eyes and saw an elephant walking right behind him. quickly, the little ant covered himself with dirt, but one leg was unfortunately left out. a sparrow saw everything, so she flew down with the purpose of teasing the ant: “hey, chicken! watch out your leg, it’s out!” the ant felt embarrassed at first but then calmly responded: “ shi…i am going to trip that elephant.”right now, i’m standing on this glamorous stage. but everything here reminds me of is a not so fun memory. around this time last year i was in nanjing competing in another speech contest. that was the first time for me to be in such a large event. of course the pressure i was under was immense too. after a sleepless and stressful night, i went onto that stage without the feeling in my legs. that speech turned out to be horrible. i don’t remember how i get down from there, but i do remember afterwards i just wanted to find a hole to hide in just like the ant in the story. back at my school, it took a long time for me to recover. thanks to all the help i got from my special friends. my confidence was restored. after rounds of giving speeches and answering tough questions, i am here today. from all tha t i’ve been through i’ve learned that a good future is based on aforgotten past, if i want my life to go on well i have to let go of my past failure. so today, with out fear, i am tripping my elephant again.三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇二good morning,dear teacher and my friends.it’s a very intresting topic today.i think my dad was a hero for me when i was a young child. we'd go fishing, walks, and other fun things for a kid.every child has a good and great father, and so do i. my dad played a very important role in my daily life`````exactly speaking, in my past 16 years.my father always stands in the center of my life， from past till now and possibly in the future.my family was rather poor when i was in my childhood. we didn't have our own house and had to live in a shabby， small room rented from my father's factory. the room was so small that there was little space for people to walk. i didn't have my own bed and had to sleep with my parents. this is terrible both for my parents and me.but father made this all different!he works very hard on his own business, now we have our own 2 housese,surly,i have my own room.and he take our family so much happiness, richer and richer.when i was little, i did everything with my dad. you could always find me sitting on his knee or walking and doing everything with him. every night he would read me a bed time story and make the voices of each character.i learnt a lot from my daddy. i learnt to never take things to seriously and to always smile.like many other fathers, my dad and i also has generationgap. he is not good at or even can’t work the computer. so when i sitting at the computer desk,he will say something like ‘you should pay more attention to your study’, ‘don’t waste time on the computer games’ , ‘it will be bad for your eyes’ and so on. how can i- a computer fan – reduce time on computer? so i continue studying and playing on ityears pasted, my father is over 45 now. it is time for me to look after him and i am sure i will do and we will live an even better life. and i will say,i really love you dad,cause you are the hero in my mind.thank you so much!三分钟搞笑英语演讲稿范文篇三the footsteps of the XX world expo is getting closer and closer to us, civilized and harmonious call is still ringing in my ears. shanghai, china obtained the right to host the world expo XX, expo XX shanghai china will be a world event, the development of shanghai's new round of golden opportunity, as it is an important embodiment of our national spirit.world expo is a great influence and a long history of international activities, is the largest gathering of human beings. people from around the world gathered in one place display their products and skills, boast of their hometown and motherland. expo set the culmination of human civilization, which has a unique appeal, make you feel surging.world expo is a platform, we are the masters. she put up a platform for us to let the world know us; she built a bridge for us, so we better communicate with the world. this platform may let us display self wantonly. we are the masters here, we have to landlord, let guest experience enthusiasm and happiness.everyone to contribute for the expo, we are no exception, asa living piece of fertile land in pudong's teachers, we are proud and pride. in the vision of a better tomorrow, we have to do for the world expo will own a wonderful ability, we have through our hands, warm heart and sincerity to practical action to achieve the commitment of shanghai to the world. we should educate the many students: do not throw garbage anywhere, no spitting, no jaywalking ... ..., hello, thank you frequently mention, let the material on this city with the new york comparable to the spiritual civilization. educate our students to exciting XX, willing to shanghai's future by copies of power, if only planted a small tree, participants in the shanghai world expo foreign guests feel: this is a forest city, pollution-free city, ancient and civilized city. better city, better life! until the time of the XX expo, then, we want to become a glorious volunteers, to changing our foreign friends in shanghai and china's long history, about our education for the world expo will contribute their efforts.we expect the majority of teachers will be great enthusiasm for the world expo into practical action to meet the world expo, the expo will be a total growth, and the city of development, the development of shanghai devote their efforts to advance hand in hand with shanghai.。
又幽默又短的英语笑话
又幽默又短的英语笑话对于笑话，可能只是文字游戏，但有时它在人们解决生活中的困惑时起着重要作用，知道英语笑话有哪些吗?下面是小编给大家带来的又幽默又短的英语笑话_有趣的笑话英语小短文，以供大家参考，我们一起来看看吧!又幽默又短的英语笑话(一)一切都正常A young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned." "You talked! You talked!" Shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taked this long?" "Well, up till now," Said the boy, "things have been okay."又幽默又短的英语笑话(二)老谋深算There was a 75-year-old multi-millionaire who had just married a beautiful 18-year-old blond girl. So his friends asked him, "How did you manage to get an 18-year-old girl to marry you, when you're 75?"And the old man replied, "I told her I was 99, so she would marry me quick!"又幽默又短的英语笑话(三)吝啬鬼的聚会The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot.""Why use my elbow and foot?""Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"又幽默又短的英语笑话(四)导盲犬帮我看A blind man with a seeing eye dog at his side walks into a grocery store.The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager, who has seen all this, thinks this is quite strange. So, he decides to find out what's going on. The store manager approaches the blind man swinging the dog and says, "Pardon me. May I help you with something." The blind man says, "No thanks. I'm just looking around."又幽默又短的英语笑话(五)林肯过生日Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812?Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.又幽默又短的英语笑话(六)三只乌龟Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee。
五篇英语幽默笑话
五篇英语幽默笑话1。
Milly："What are you doing？"米丽：“你在做什么？”Molly："I'm writing a letter to myself。
"茉莉：“我在给自己写信。
”Milly："What does it say？"米丽：“信上说什么？”Molly："How do I know？ I won't get it till tomorrow。
"茉莉：“我怎么知道？我到明天才会收到。
”2。
"Is ink so expensive， daddy？"“墨水很贵吗，爸爸？”"Why， no， what makes you think so？"“啊，不贵，你为什么这样想？”"Well。
Mother seems quite disturbed because I spilled some ink on the carpet。
"“啊。
我把一些墨水洒到了地毯上，妈妈好似很难过。
”3。
A mother was talking to her little boy。
"Now，Billy， you shouldn't be selfish with your toys。
I've told you to let your younger brother play with them half the time。
"一位母亲在和她的小男孩说话。
“听着，比利，你对自己的玩具不应该自私。
我已经对你说过要让弟弟玩一半时间。
”"That's what I've been doing， " said Billy。
"I take the sled doing downhill， and he takes it going up。
搞笑的初中英语作文短篇
搞笑的初中英语作文短篇A Funny Day at School。
Today was a funny day at school. It all started when our math teacher, Mr. Smith, walked into the classroom with a bright pink shirt on. We all burst out laughing, and even Mr. Smith couldn't help but chuckle at himself.Then, during our English class, our teacher, Mrs. Johnson, accidentally wrote "teh" instead of "the" on the board. We all pointed it out to her, and she turned bright red with embarrassment. But she quickly recovered and made a joke about it, saying that even teachers make mistakes sometimes.At lunchtime, we were all sitting around the table, chatting and laughing, when suddenly one of my friends let out a huge burp. We all looked at him in shock, but then we all started laughing uncontrollably. It was so unexpected and silly that we couldn't help ourselves.After lunch, we had P.E. class, and we were playing dodgeball. One of my classmates threw the ball so hard that it hit the ceiling and got stuck there. We all looked up in amazement, and our P.E. teacher had to climb up on a chair to retrieve it. It was so funny to see him struggling to get the ball down, and we all cheered when he finally succeeded.Finally, at the end of the day, we were all waiting for the school bus when a gust of wind blew one of my friend's hats off. It went flying across the parking lot, and we all chased after it, laughing and shouting. We finally caught it, and my friend put it back on his head, looking a little disheveled but still smiling.All in all, it was a really funny day at school. Sometimes it's the unexpected moments that make us laugh the most, and today was definitely full of those. I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings!。
三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿
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The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!In addition, this shop provides you with various types of classic sample essays, such as work materials, educational materials, workplace information, letter of entry, administrative documents, planning plans, secretarial knowledge, contract agreements, activity reports, other sample essays, etc. I would like to know Please pay attention to the different format and writing styles of sample essays!三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文1the footsteps of the XX world expo is getting closer and closer to us, civilized and harmonious call is still ringing in my ears. shanghai, china obtained the right to host the world expo XX, expo XX shanghai china will be a world event, the development of shanghai's new round of golden opportunity, as it is an important embodiment of our national spirit.world expo is a great influence and a long history of international activities, is the largest gathering of human beings. people from around the world gathered in one place display their products and skills, boast of their hometown and motherland. expo set the culmination of human civilization, which has a unique appeal, make you feel surging.world expo is a platform, we are the masters. she put up a platform for us to let the world know us; she built a bridge for us, so we better communicate with the world. this platform may let us display self wantonly. we are themasters here, we have to landlord, let guest experience enthusiasm and happiness.everyone to contribute for the expo, we are no exception, as a living piece of fertile land in pudong's teachers, we are proud and pride. in the vision of a better tomorrow, we have to do for the world expo will own a wonderful ability, we have through our hands, warm heart and sincerity to practical action to achieve the commitment of shanghai to the world. we should educate the many students: do not throw garbage anywhere, no spitting, no jaywalking ... ..., hello, thank you frequently mention, let the material on this city with the new york comparable to the spiritual civilization. educate our students to exciting XX, willing to shanghai's future by copies of power, if only planted a small tree, participants in the shanghai world expo foreign guests feel: this is a forest city, pollution-free city, ancient and civilized city. better city, better life! until the time of the XX expo, then, we want to become a glorious volunteers, to changing our foreign friends in shanghai and china's long history, about our education for the world expo will contribute their efforts.we expect the majority of teachers will be great enthusiasm for the world expo into practical action to meet the world expo, the expo will be a total growth, and the city of development, the development of shanghai devote their efforts to advance hand in hand with shanghai.三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文2good afternoon!recently, ther is a heated debate in our society. the college students are the beneficiaries of a rare privilege, who receive exceptional education at extraordinary places. but will we be able to face the challenge and support ourselves against all odds? will we be able to better the lives of others? will we be able to accept the responsibility of building the future of our country?the cynics say the college students are the pampered lost generation, which would cringe at the slightest discomfort. but the cynics are wrong. the college students i see are eagerly learning about how to live independently. we help each other clean the dormitory, go shopping and bargain together, and take part time jobs to supplement ourpocket money.the cynics say we care for nothing other than grades; and we neglect the need for character cultivation. but again, the cynics are wrong. we care deeply for each other, we cherish freedom, we treasure justice, and we seek truth. last week, thousands of my fellow students had their blood type tested in order to make a contribution for the children who suffer from blood cancer.as college students, we are adolescents at the critical turning point in our lives. we all face a fundamental choice: cynicism or faith, each will profoundly impact our future, or even the future of our country. i believe in all my fellow classmates. though we are still inexperienced and even a little bit childish. i believe that we have the courage and faith to meet any challenge and take on our responsibilities. we are preparing to assume new responsibilities and tasks, and to use the education we have received to make our world a better place. i believe in our future.三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文3good afternoon ，ladies and gentlemen!i’m very honored to stand here and give you a shortspeech! to begin with ,i want to ask a question .does everybody dream a good dream last night? actually ,today i want to talk about dream with you. of course, what i want to talk is not a dream you have last night,but a dream —— about life.everyone has dreams about life, different dreams at different life stage,and we need dreams to support us. dreams are like the stars we never reach in the sky,but like most mariners(水手),we can chart our course by them. with the dream,we have a direction,with a direction, we were no longer confused.with the dream, there is hope,with hope, we have the strength to fight.i have a dream: to be a doctor.，because doctor may relieve the pain of patients. may let the human change the health. at the same time, i believed that, those who help others may be able to obtain joyfully. therefore, i hoped in the near future ,i might be a doctor.but i know，life is tough,and there are always ups and downs, maybe we fail in the way to our aims,and we may feel depressed ,whenever at this time, the dream in our heart can always comfort us, encourage us ,and support us to move ahead .young!fortunately, i am young now. just due to it, i know that nothing is impossible.i firmly believe that nothing can stand in my way. if i can't realize my dream,it result from that i haven't work harder enough and i won't find other excuses. if no people believe you, you can make it to prove that you are right. if you think the god haven't blessed you and there is no truth here, you can become the god and create the truth."my breath swallows the sky and make the yellow river overflow, my sword is famous in kyushu and it can collapse the five sacred mountains." at some time in the past i also had am bitious words and i had some achievements. each achievement results from my hard work. i always believe that "if you want to have more achievements than others, you must work harder." in some extent, the dream is the hope. if you can insist on doing something, the victory will come.hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly. hold fast to dreams, for when dreams go, life is a barren field frozen with snow. so my dear friends, think of your old and maybe dead dreams. whatever it is, pick it up and make it alive from today. let's--- move ----out!thank you for your listening!三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文4good morning,dear teacher and my friends.it’s a very intresting topic today.i think my dad was a hero for me when i was a young child. we'd go fishing, walks, and other fun things for a kid.every child has a good and great father, and so do i. my dad played a very important role in my daily life`````exactly speaking, in my past 16 years.my father always stands in the center of my life， from past till now and possibly in the future.my family was rather poor when i was in my childhood. we didn't have our own house and had to live in a shabby，small room rented from my father's factory. the room was so small that there was little space for people to walk.i didn't have my own bed and had to sleep with my parents. this is terrible both for my parents and me.but father made this all different!he works very hard on his own business, now we have our own 2 housese,surly,i have my own room.and he take our family so much happiness, richer and richer.when i was little, i did everything with my dad. youcould always find me sitting on his knee or walking and doing everything with him. every night he would read me a bed time story and make the voices of each character.i learnt a lot from my daddy. i learnt to never take things to seriously and to always smile.like many other fathers, my dad and i also has generation gap. he is not good at or even can’t work the computer. so when i sitting at the computer desk,he will say something like ‘you should pay more attention to your study’, ‘don’t waste time on the computer games’ , ‘it will be bad for your eyes’ and so on. how can i- a computer fan – reduce time on computer? so i continue studying and playing on ityears pasted, my father is over 45 now. it is time for me to look after him and i am sure i will do and we will live an even better life. and i will say,i really love you dad,cause you are the hero in my mind.thank you so much!三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文5once upon a time, a weenie ant was walking on his way. as he was walking, suddenly he felt the ground shaking terribly. he looked around with his paranoid eyes and sawan elephant walking right behind him. quickly, the little ant covered himself with dirt, but one leg was unfortunately left out. a sparrow saw everything, so she flew down with the purpose of teasing the ant: “hey, chicken! watch out your leg, it’s out!” the ant felt embarrassed at first but then calmly responded: “ shi…i am going to trip that elephant.”right now, i’m standing on this glamorous stage. but everything here reminds me of is a not so fun memory. around this time last year i was in nanjing competing in another speech contest. that was the first time for me to be in such a large event. of course the pressure i was under was immense too. after a sleepless and stressful night, i went onto that stage without the feeling in my legs. that speech turned out to be horrible. i don’t remember how i get down from there, but i do remember afterwards i just wanted to find a hole to hide in just like the ant in the story. back at my school, it took a long time for me to recover. thanks to all the help i got from my special friends. my confidence was restored. after rounds of giving speeches and answering tough questions, i am here today. from all that i’ve been through i’ve learned that a good future is based on aforgotten past, if i want my life to go on well i have to let go of my past failure. so today, with out fear, i am tripping my elephant again.三分钟幽默搞笑英语演讲稿范文6love your motherwhy are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?"because i'm a woman," she told him."i don't understand," he said.his mom just hugged him and said,"and you never will, but that's o.k.".......later the little boy asked his father,"why does mom seem to cry for no reason?"."all women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say......the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked "god, why do women cry so easily?"god answered......"when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,made her arms gentle enough to give comfort...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectionthat many times will comeeven from her own children.i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue withoutcomplaining....i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....i gave her strength to care for her husband, despitefaultsand i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....。
英语幽默笑话带翻译
英语幽默笑话带翻译1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."2:You can't go without meThe bus is very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him."Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts."It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him."But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says.没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路."喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道."车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说."但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.3:DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。
幽默感的重要性,幽默感的重要性范文_大学英语作文
幽默感的重要性,幽默感的重要性范文幽默感的重要性 A sense of humor,God's greatest gift to mankind,is universally considered the most valuable personality.It is born within every person's heart,but has to be cultivated.A person without humor is just like a spring without flowers,or like a dish without seasoning.In a sense,your personality lies in your sense of humor.Humor can improve physical as well as mental well-being.It helps us bear our burdens,lessen our tension,overcome our frustration.With a piece of joke,all our worries and sadness disappear like smoke,and we are full of vigor once again.Humor helps us live in harmony with others.It is unavoidable to have misunderstanding and tension with others during work and study.But humor can ease these problems quicker than angry words or quarrels.With it you can always keep on good terms with others.A sense of humor is really one of the keys to happiness.It gives fun and zest to life to make it worth living.幽默感的重要性。
有关幽默英文作文
有关幽默英文作文你们写的英语作文，是否有幽默的因素?让人读之则开怀一笑呢?下面是店铺给大家带来幽默英语范文，供大家参阅!幽默英文作文篇1When we are chatting with our friends happily, suddenly if we are talking about the awkward topic, we need to do something to change this situation, what are we gonna do? The answer is using your humor to make things seem easy, and then your friends won’t take your awkward topic seriously. Humor is very important, it can adjust the atmosphere, making things work easily. Life needs humor, without humor, life would be boring. Foreign people like to make friends with humorous people, they can feel relax when they are chatting, while most Chinese people are always taking things too seriously. I like to make friends with humorous guys, they make me feel life is easy, and we should positive about life.当我们和朋友聊得很开心的时候，突然如果我们聊到很尴尬的话题，需要做一些事情来改变情形，我们该怎么做呢?答案是使用你的幽默来让事情看起来轻松些，然后你的朋友就不会把你尴尬的话题当真。
用英语作文形容一个人幽默风趣
用英语作文形容一个人幽默风趣英文回答：I have a friend named Jack who is incredibly funny and witty. Whenever we hang out, he always has a clever remark or a hilarious joke up his sleeve. One time, we were at a party and Jack started telling a story about his latest mishap at work. The way he described the situation had everyone in stitches, and even the most serious people in the room couldn't help but burst out laughing.What I love most about Jack's sense of humor is that it's not just about making jokes, but also about finding humor in everyday situations. For example, we were once stuck in traffic for over an hour, and instead of getting frustrated like everyone else, Jack started making funny observations about the other drivers and their reactions. He turned a boring and stressful situation into a fun and entertaining experience.Jack's humor is also very inclusive – he never makes jokes at someone else's expense or crosses any boundaries. He has a way of making everyone feel comfortable and included in the laughter, which is a rare quality to find in a funny person.Overall, Jack's humor is like a breath of fresh air in my life. He has a way of lightening the mood and bringing a smile to my face, no matter what kind of day I'm having.I'm grateful to have such a witty and humorous friend in my life.中文回答：我有一个朋友叫杰克，他非常幽默风趣。
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幽默用英语说范文幽默、搞笑的中英文翻译大全~本人见过的最邪门的翻译电影《国产007》=《From Bei __g with Love》——从北京带着爱《唐伯虎点秋香》=《Flirting Scholar》——正在调情的学者《鹿鼎记》（黄晓明版陈小春版梁朝伟版） =《Royal Tramp》——皇家流浪汉《英雄本色》=《A Better Tomorrow》——明天会更好《神雕侠侣》(内地版古天乐版刘德华版)=《Saviour of the Soul》——灵魂的救星《三国演义》=《Romance of Three Kingdoms》——三个王国的罗曼史《赤壁》＝《Red Cliff》——红岩《霸王别姬》=《Farewell My Concubine》——再见了，我的小老婆《东邪西毒》=《Ashes of Time》——时间的灰烬（这个译名意味深长，无论你是东邪还是西毒，武功再高还不是最后都成了时间的灰烬？）《甲方乙方》=《Dream Factory》——梦工厂《烈火金刚》=《Steel Meets Fire》——钢遇上了火《刘三姐》=《Third Sister Liu》——第三个姐姐刘《花样年华》=《In the Mood for Love》——在爱的情绪中五讲、四美、三热爱大学校园里，流行"五讲、四美、三热爱"，中国人把其翻译成："five talks ,four beauty ,threelovers".美国人一听迷惑了"five talks"敢情是谈了五个，"four beauty"敢情是谈了五个，其中有四个是美人，那么"three lovers"一定是爱上了四个美人中的三个（笑声不断）。
武林秘籍的英文翻译冲灵剑法 GG and MM ’’s soul sword (GG和MM的灵魂之剑，听起来好像很熟悉 )九阳神功 nine man’’s power (九个男子的力量)九阴真经 nine woman’’story (九个女人的故事)九阴白骨爪 nine woman catch a white bone(九个女人抓著一个白骨，老外看了还以为会出现召唤兽呢)历史上最强的翻译1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don't bird me, I don't bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！ together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody! f you have something to say, then say! if you have nothing to say, go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know no know is no know知之为知之，不知为不。
9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse' son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子大地洞11.American Chinese not enough 美中不足12.one car e one car go ,two car pengpeng, people die 车祸现场描述(一辆车来一辆车走，两车“嘭嘭“，人死了)13.heart flower angry open 心花怒放14.go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过15.小明： I am sorry!老外： I am sorry too!小明： I am sorry three!老外： What are you sorry for?小明： I am sorry five!16.If you want money, I have no; if you want life, I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条！17.I call Li old big, to year 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。
18．you have two down son. 你有两下子horse horse tiger tiger 马马虎虎people mountain people sea 人山人海If you tiger me, I will mountain you. 你唬我我就扇你 you ask me, me ask who? 你问我我问谁one poor two white; 一穷二白eat tofu; 吃豆腐give you a color to see see! 给你点颜色看看no good see 不好看no door! 没门老师叫翻译Who is this man?答：这是谁的男人？全班大笑，老师无语。
we two who and who!译：咱俩谁跟谁啊！How are you? How old are you?译：怎么是你？怎么老是你？YOU have seed i will give you some color see see, brothers! together up! 译：你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧。
兄弟们，一起上！I call Li old big.toyear25.译：我叫李老大，今年25.As far as you go to die!译：要多远死多远！800yuan, eat you, sleep you.译：800块，吃你的，住你的一次为一个初中小孩搞家教，在其英语课本上发现如下恐怖字眼：爸死（bus）爷死( yes )哥死（girls）妹死（Mis）……死光（school）good good study, day day up 好好学习，天天向上三字经人之初： At the begining of life.性本善： Sex is good.性相近： Basically,all the sex are same.习相远： But it depends on how the way you do it.苟不教： If you do not practise all the time.性乃迁： Sex will leave you..篇一：幽默英语演讲稿幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say......所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered...... 上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faultsand i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....when you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人．but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.篇二：英语演讲幽默开场白英语演讲幽默开场白作为一个演讲者，我从观众那只得到过两种抱怨：一种是我讲话声音太大了，他们无法入睡；第二种是我讲得时间太长了，他们无法一直清醒。