英语搞笑短剧剧本 5。

英语搞笑短剧剧本5—6人

三打白骨精

Three Times’ Beating Monster

人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空E：猪八戒J：沙僧

B：白骨精B1：B变成的村姑B2：B变成的太婆

B3：B变化成的老头N：哪吒

T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?

S: Bajie,map!

E: (摸出，递给S)

S: Look,master (凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E）

T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, nof to bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you!

E: Oh,master!Forgive me(伸手拿回)

T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west

E: But……

T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?

E: (递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So.

S: Fat Pig!

E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……….

S: You will what(凶相)?

E: (软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).

S: Hm!

T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?

E: You see ,master is hungry,too!

T: Ba jie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!

J: But master,if a monster comes while brother monkey is away…..

T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have a ny idea?

S: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）

E: This is…..?

S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!

T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!

S: Bye!(走)

T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》

B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1)

B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you?

T: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.

B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!

T: Bomb?(打出)

B1: Double King!

T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a master-hand. Come in and teach me!(准备开电网门)

S: (回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)

B1: （倒)Ah……

T: (气愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!

S: She is a monster!

T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)

S: Oh,pl ease don’t……

T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)

S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)

T: (呛住，咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!

B: (真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)

B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?

T: Daughter?...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡)

S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2)

E&J: Are you Ok, master?(扶T)

J: Look,(伸食指)how many?

T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3)

B3: (看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it(哭喊)

S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)

T: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住)You have killed three lives!

S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!