高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇

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关于英文笑话故事5篇

关于英文笑话故事5篇

关于英文笑话故事5篇从文化的角度对英语幽默笑话进行分析,英语教学中对英语幽默笑话的有效利用是培养文化知识的一种重要途径。

下面是店铺带来的关于英文笑话故事,欢迎阅读!关于英文笑话故事篇一a lieMom: "Which banana do you want, Victor?"Victor: "I want that one of the greatest."Mom: "Victor, you should be polite, to have that little one."Victor: "Mom, I must lie to be polite?"妈妈:“你要哪一只香蕉,维克多?”维克多:“我要那只最大的。

”妈妈:“维克多,你应该懂礼貌,要那只小的。

”维克多:“妈妈,难道懂礼貌就必须说谎吗?”关于英文笑话故事篇二Two Birds 两只鸟Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.Teacher: Please tell us.Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。

谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。

老师:请说说看。

学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

关于英文笑话故事篇三Who Is the Laziest 谁最懒Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?Tom: I don't know, father.Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?Tom: Our teacher, father.父亲:哎,汤姆,今天我跟你们老师谈过,现在我想问你个问题。

有关高中英语小笑话大全

有关高中英语小笑话大全

有关高中英语小笑话篇一Whose Dog Was the SmartestFour friends were arguing over whose dog was the smartest. The first man, an engineer, calledto his dog, "T Square, show your stuff. " The dog trotted over to a desk, pulled out a paperand pencil, and drew a perfect triangle.The next guy, an accountant, called to his dog, "Slide Rule, go ahead. " The dog went tothe kitchen, nibbled opened a bag of cookies and pided the contents into four equal piles.The next man, a chemist, beckoned his dog, Beaker, to show what he could do. The dogwent to the fridge, took out a quart of milk and poured out exactly eighty ounces into ameasuring cup.The last man was a government worker. "Coffee Break," he hollered to his dog, "go to it. "With that, the dog jumped to his feet, soiled the paper, ate the cookies and drank the milk.谁的狗最聪明四个朋友在为谁的狗最聪明而争吵。

高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇

高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇

高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇关于高中英语幽默笑话故事<一>the wolf and the fox wanted to eat the rabbit, but it wasn't easy to catch him.one day the wolf said to the fox, "you go home and lie in bed. i'll tell the rabbit that you are dead. when he comes to look at you, you can jump up and catch him." that's a good idea," said the fox.he went home at once. the wolf went to the rabbit's house and knocked at the door. "who is it?" asked the rabbit. "it's the wolf. i've come to tell you that the fox is dead." then the wolf went away.the rabbit went to the fox's house. he looked in through the window and saw the fox lying in bed with his eyes closed. he thought, "is the fox really dead or is he pretending to be dead? if he's not dead, he'll catch me when i go near him." so he said, "the wolf says that the fox is dead. but he doesn't look like a dead fox. the mouth of a dead fox is always open." when the fox heard this, he thought, "i'll show him that i'm dead." so he opened his mouth.the rabbit knew that the fox wasn't dead, and he ran as quickly as he could.狼和狐狸想要吃掉兔子,但是这只兔子太难抓到了。

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话

英语幽默笑话英语幽默笑话(精选15篇) 在繁忙的学习⼯作中,适时读⼀些幽默笑话,放松⾃⼰,劳逸结合⼗分重要。

下⾯是⼩编为你整理的⼏则英语幽默精彩段⼦,让你笑到停不下来 英语幽默笑话篇1 ⼀、我是单⾝汉 Jack feell off his bicycle and got hurt.A beautiful young nurse asked him to fill forms.Jack finished them and gave them back."Anything else?" The nurse asked."Yes,"Jack thinks for a while and said,"I'm a bachelor." 杰克骑车摔伤,得住院治疗.⼀位年轻美貌的护⼠拿着表格让填.仞杰克填好递上表格"还有什么漏填的?"护⼠问."有!"杰克想了想说,"我是个单⾝汉." ⼆、死于肝癌的⼈100%都吃饭 Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho. Husband:It's okey.To my investigation,all Thespeopleeat meals. 妻⼦:你看这张报纸,据统计,死于肝癌的⼈80%都是喝酒的. 丈夫:那有什么?据我调查,死于肝癌的⼈100%都吃饭的. 三、位置上的冰激凌 "Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine." "Yours?Can you prove it?" "Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it." "请原谅,你占了我的位置." "你的位置?你能征明这点吗?" "能,我在位置上放了杯冰激凌." 四、别⽆选择 One day,Eve asked Adam,"Doyou really love me?" Adam said helplessly,"Do I have any other choice?" ⼀天,夏娃问亚当:"你当真爱我吗?" 亚当⽆可奈何地回答:"我还有的选择吗?" 五、两个男孩 Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says,"Why are you arguing?" One boy answers,"We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher,"When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher. 当⽼师⾛进教室时,两个男孩在争论. ⽼师是说:你们在争论什么? ⼀个男孩回答:‘我们捡到⼀张10块,我们决定把它给⼀个说最⼤的谎的⼈.’ ‘你们应该觉得羞耻’⽼师说,‘当我像你们那么⼤的时候,我连什么是说谎都不知道.’ 两个男孩把钱给了那个⽼师. 六、两只鸟 Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which? Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer. Teacher:Please tell us. Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. ⽼师:这⼉有两只鸟,⼀只是⿇雀.谁能指出哪只是燕⼦,哪只是⿇雀吗? 学⽣:我指不出,但我知道答案. ⽼师:请说说看. 学⽣:燕⼦旁边的`就是⿇雀,⿇雀旁边的就是燕⼦. 七、鱼⽹ "Can you tell me what fish net is made,Ann?" "A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl. "你能告诉我鱼⽹是什么做的吗," ⽼师发问道. "把许多⼩孔⽤绳⼦栓在⼀起就成了鱼⽹了." ⼩⼥孩回答道. ⼋、他赢了 Tommy:How is your little brother,Johnny?Johnny:He is ill in bed.He hurt himself. Tommy:That's too bad.How did that happen? Johnny:We played who could lean furthest out of the window,and he won. 汤姆:约翰尼,你⼩弟弟好吗? 约翰尼:他害病卧床了.他受了伤. 汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事⼉? 约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把⾝⼦探出窗外最远,他赢了. 选我吧 英语幽默笑话篇2 ⼼不在焉的⽼师 An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street withone foot continually in the gutter,the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said: “Good evening,professor.How are you? “Well,” answered the professor,“I thought I was all right when I left home,but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.” 有⼀天,⼈们看见⼀个有名的⼼不在焉的⽼师在路上⾛,他的⼀只脚⼀直踏在街沟⾥,另⼀只脚踩在⼈⾏道上。

超简短的英文笑话

超简短的英文笑话

超简短的英文笑话超简短的英文笑话(精选5篇)超简短的英文笑话1On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。

班上最小的女孩说,她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿,那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了。

超简短的英文笑话2Professor: When is your birthday?Kid: May 30.Professor: Which year?Kid: Every year.教授:你的生日是什么时候?孩子:5月30日。

教授:哪一年?孩子:每年都是。

超简短的英文笑话3Before the final examination, T om told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that Id passed todays exam.""Dont trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope Ill fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的

英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一:Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。

The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。

过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。

The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。

你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上,先生。

”那小男孩说。

英语爆笑笑话二:太黑了,看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后,父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将,这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来,便对正在看电视的儿子说道:“宝贝,去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿,儿子回来说:“妈,厨房里太黑了,我根本就看不见。

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)英国人有他们独特的英式幽默,他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑,今天,小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话,希望大家能开心开心,一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说:“你的英语最近学的怎么样?”“很好,我过去不懂英国人说话,可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译篇一:英语幽默笑话带翻译英语幽默笑话带翻译1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: “I think that he is very ill.”“I am afraid that he is dead.”said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: “I’m not dead. I’m still alive.”“Be quiet, “said the wife. “the doctor knows better than you!”医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:”我想他伤得很厉害.”医生说:”我怕他已经死了.”听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:”我没死,我还活着.”妻子说:”安静,医生比你懂得多.”2:You can’t go without meThe bus is very tries to get on,but no one gives way to him. “Hey,let me get on the bus.”the man shouts.”It’s too ‘d better take the next bus.”a passenger says to him.”But you can’t go withou ‘m the driver.”the man says.没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路.”喂,让我上车!”那位男士喊道.”车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆”车上的一位乘客对他说.”但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!”那位男士说道.3:DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, “What’s the meaning of the word ‘Drunk’, dad?”“Well, my son,” his father replied, “look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.””But, dad,”the boy said, “there’s only ONE policeman!”醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。

英语搞笑笑话6篇

英语搞笑笑话6篇

英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中,它是笑话的精料,智慧之所在。

笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古。

下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一:How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了,在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人,我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。

孩子们齐声回答:“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂,给院子的草坪割草,并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁,我会上天堂吗?”回答还是:“不能!”“好吧,”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道:“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二:I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译

高中英语好笑笑话带翻译篇一:英语幽默笑话带翻译英语幽默笑话带翻译1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."said the doctor, Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive." "Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!" 医生懂得多一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."2:You can't go without meThe bus is very crowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him. "Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts."It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says to him."But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says.没有我你们走不了公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路."喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道."车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说."但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.3:DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。

3分钟高中英语笑话大全

3分钟高中英语笑话大全

3分钟高中英语笑话大全3分钟高中英语笑话篇一Charge for Bread and ButterSome years ago, my dad, an attorney, took me to a fancy restaurant in Now York City. When the bill arrived, there was a $1.50 charge for bread and butter. Dad paid the bill, including the charge for bread and butter. However, the ne某t day, he sent a letter to the resturant stating that the charge was uncalled for. Enclosed in the same envelope was a bill for $500 in legal services.Someone from the restaurant called immediately and asked, "Whatis this $500 bill for? We never ordered any legal services."Dad replied, "I never ordered any bread and butter."The $1.50 was returned without delay.面包和黄油费几年前,我当律师的爸爸带我去纽约的一家高档餐馆。

帐单上来时,上面有1.5美元的面包和黄油费。

爸爸付了帐,连同面包和黄油的收费一齐付了。

但是第二天,他给餐馆寄了一封信,说那项收费是没有道理的。

随信还寄上了一张500美元的法律服务机构的收费单。

餐馆马上打来电话,问道:“这500美元的收费单是怎么回事?我们从来没有要什么法律机构的服务。

关于高中生的英语笑话

关于高中生的英语笑话

关于高中生的英语笑话作为一种独特的娱乐方式,英语笑话能够帮助人们减轻压力、放松心情、缓解疲劳,有利于身体健康。

下面是店铺带来的关于高中生的英语笑话,欢迎阅读!关于高中生的英语笑话篇一There was a perfect man and a perfect woman. They met each other at a perfect party. They dated for two perfect years. They had the perfect wedding and the perfect honeymoon. They had two perfect children.One day the perfect man and the perfect woman were driving in there perfect car, they saw an elf by the side of the road, being the perfect people they were they picked him up.Well as the perfect man and the perfect woman were driving with the elf, somehow they got into an accident. Two people died and one lived.Who died and who lived?The perfect woman, because the perfect man and elves aren't real.曾经有一个完美男人和一个完美女人,它们邂逅于一个完美的聚会。

完美的约会持续了两年,然后他们举行了完美的婚礼,并度过了完美的蜜月。

之后他们有了两个完美的孩子。

一天,完美男人和完美女人驾着他们那完美的轿车出行。

他们在路边看到一个精灵,由于他们是完美男女,于是他们载了精灵一程。

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)下面是编辑整理的英语小笑话,希望能让您捧腹大笑!英语小笑话【一】1、The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译:鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

小女孩回答道。

2、律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off"翻译:一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的”律师哀怨地说。

适合高一的英语笑话大全

适合高一的英语笑话大全

适合高一的英语笑话大全笑话是一种十分常见的语言现象,在日常生活中,它无处不在,起着十分重要的作用。

下面是店铺带来的适合高一的英语笑话,欢迎阅读!适合高一的英语笑话篇一One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years about it."Oh, that," Frank said. "Every time I cheated on you, I put an egg in this box." Sue was a bit unhappy about this, but figured that 3 affairs over twenty years wasn't so bad."But what about the 10,000 dollars?""Every time I got a dozen, I sold them."一天,妻子Sue 在整理床铺时,偶然发现了一个小盒子。

出于好奇心,她小心翼翼的打开了盒子,发现里面放了三枚鸡蛋和10000美元钞票。

对于相处了20余年丈夫居然对自己隐瞒了此事,她开始感到有些疑惑不安。

“哦,是这样的,”丈夫Frank 解释道,“每次我做了对你不忠的事,我就会在这个盒子里放一枚鸡蛋。

” Sue 虽然对此感到不很高兴,但是转念又一想20多年的丈夫背着她有婚外情也不过只有三次,想想也不算太坏。

“那么另外的那10000美元是怎么回事?”“每当鸡蛋凑够一打,我就卖了换成现金。

英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读

英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读

英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读多阅读一些有趣的英语笑话,能激起我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享英语搞笑笑话10篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话篇一An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter,the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said:“Good evening,professor.How are you? “Well,” answered the professor,“I thought I was all right when I left home,but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.”有一天,人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走,他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里,另一只脚踩在人行道上。

一个碰见他的学生说:“晚安,老师。

您怎么了?” “啊,”这位老师回答说:“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的,可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。

我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。

”英语搞笑笑话篇二It's His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys.They were brothers,and they often had fights with each other. Last Saturday their mother said to them,“I'm going to cook our lunch now.Go out and play in the garden—and be goo d.” “Yes,Mummy,” the two boys answered,and they went out. They played in the garden for half an hour,and then Billy ran into the kitchen.“Mummy,” he said,“Bobby's broken a window in Mrs.Allen's house.” Mrs.Allen was one of their neighbors. “He's a bad boy,”his mother said.“How did he break it?” “I threw a stone at him,” Billy answered,“and he quickly moved down.”比利和波比都是小男孩。

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。

下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一:我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说:“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。

我妻子是财政部长。

我岳母是作战部长,我女儿是外交秘书。

”“听上去挺有意思的,”他的同事说,“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。

我要做的一切就是付钱。

”英语笑话二:喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭,父亲把服务生叫了过来。

高中英语小笑话大全爆笑

高中英语小笑话大全爆笑

高中英语小笑话大全爆笑笑话(jokes)往往是指能引人发笑的谈话或故事。

作为文体,篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,取得令人捧腹的艺术效果。

店铺整理了高中爆笑英语小笑话,欢迎阅读!高中爆笑英语小笑话篇一"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?""No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other ,so I am trying to stop it."把它堵在里面“孩子,你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了吗?”“没有,老师。

可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进,一个耳朵里出,所以我要把它堵在里面。

”高中爆笑英语小笑话篇二A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travel bag onto theplane. Helped by the flight attendant, he finally managed to stuff it in the overhead bin.'Doyou always carry such heavy luggage?' she sighed.'No more,'the man said.'Next time, I'm hiding in the bag, and my parter can buy the ticket!'行李一个商人拖着他那鼓鼓囊囊的特大号旅行袋登上飞机,真够费劲的。

在一位机务乘员的帮助下,他终于设法将旅行袋进了头顶上的行李箱。

幽默的英语笑话短文

幽默的英语笑话短文

幽默的英语笑话短文幽默的英语笑话短文(精选11篇)在繁忙的学习工作中,适时读一些幽默笑话,放松自己,劳逸结合十分重要。

下面是小编整理的幽默的英语笑话短文(精选11篇),希望大家喜欢!幽默的英语笑话短文篇1The Brain Surgeon was about to perform a brain transplant."You have your choice of two brains," he told the patient,"For $1000 you can have the brain of a psychologist,or for $10,000 you can have the brain of a politician."The patient was amazed at the huge difference in price."Is the brain of a politician that much better?" he asked.The Brain Surgeon replied,"No,it’s not better,just unused."一个外科医生正要作一个脑移植手术。

“你可以从两个脑子中选一个给你。

”医生告诉病人,“一个心理学家的大脑1000美元,一个政治家的大脑10000美元。

病人很惊讶二者之间这样大的.差别,“政治家的大脑好一些吗?”他问。

医生说:“不是好一些,只是没有用过。

”幽默的英语笑话短文篇2Mike:Mum,I want to watch TV.Mum:There is no electricity tonight.Mike:Then let's watch TVwith a candie on.迈克:妈妈,我想看电视。

妈妈:今晚停电了。

迈克:那我们就点着蜡烛看吧。

英文小笑话高中作文大全

英文小笑话高中作文大全

英文小笑话高中作文大全冷笑话是近年来颇为流行的一种语言现象,主要以机智、幽默著称。

店铺整理了高中英文小笑话,欢迎阅读!高中英文小笑话篇一a young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. they took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, mom, the toast is burned.一对年轻夫妇有个儿子,已经四岁了,还没有开口说话,他们对此深感焦虑。

他们带他去找专家诊治,但医生们总觉得他没有毛病。

后来有一天早上吃早餐时,那孩子突然开口了:妈妈,面包烤焦了。

you talked! you talked! shouted his mother. i'm so happy! but why has it taked this long?你说话了!你说话了!他母亲叫了起来。

我太高兴了!但为什么花了这么长的时间呢?well, up till now, said the boy, things have been okay.哦,在这之前,那男孩说,一切都很正常。

高中英文小笑话篇二it's not my fault不是我的错mother (reprimanding训斥,谴责her small daughter): you mustn't pull the cat's tail.妈妈(正教训她的女儿):你不该拽猫的尾巴。

daughter: i'm only holding it, mom. the cat's doing the pulling.女儿:妈,我只是握着猫尾巴,它自己在拽。

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高中英语幽默笑话故事五篇有时候阅读一些幽默搞笑的英语故事,除了能让人产生兴趣更能提高英语阅读水平。

以下是小编给大家整理的关于高中英语幽默笑话故事,希望可以帮到大家关于高中英语幽默笑话故事<一>the wolf and the fox wanted to eat the rabbit, but it wasn't easy to catch him.one day the wolf said to the fox, "you go home and lie in bed. i'll tell the rabbitthat you are dead. when he comes to look at you, you can jump up and catch him." that's a good idea," said the fox.he went home at once. the wolf went to the rabbit's house and knocked at the door. "who is it?" asked the rabbit. "it's the wolf. i've come to tell you that the fox is dead." then the wolf went away.the rabbit went to the fox's house. he looked in through the window and saw the fox lying in bed with his eyes closed. he thought, "is the fox really dead or is he pretending to be dead? if he's not dead, he'll catch me when i go near him." so he said, "the wolf says that the fox is dead. but he doesn't look like a dead fox. themouth of a dead fox is always open." when the fox heard this, he thought, "i'll show him that i'm dead." so he opened his mouth.the rabbit knew that the fox wasn't dead, and he ran as quickly as he could.狼和狐狸想要吃掉兔子,但是这只兔子太难抓到了。

一天,狼对狐狸说:“你回家假装躺在床上。

我去告诉兔子你已经死了。

当他来看你的时候,你就可以跳起来抓住他了。

”“真是个好主意!”狐狸说。

于是他立刻回到家。

狼去兔子的房前敲了敲门,“是谁啊?”兔子问道。

“狼,我是来告诉你狐狸已经死了。

”说完狼就走开了。

兔子去狐狸家看情况。

他通过狐狸家的窗户看到闭着眼睛的狐狸躺在床上。

他想,狐狸是真的死了,还是在假装呢?如果他没有死,那么我走近他就会被他抓住。

于是他说:“狼说狐狸死了。

但是他看起来并不像死掉了呀。

死去的狐狸通常都是张着嘴的。

”狐狸听到这些话就想:我得证明自己是真的死了。

于是他张开了嘴巴。

这时兔子知道狐狸并没有死,他就以最快的速度跑开啦关于高中英语幽默笑话故事<二>there was a little old lady who was nearly blind, and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best to her.从前有一个近乎失明的小老太,她有三个儿子,每一个都想向母亲证明自己对她最好。

son 1 bought her a 15-room mansion, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer her.第一个儿子为她买下一栋有15个房间的大屋,他觉得这是对母亲最好的孝顺方式,其他兄弟都比不上。

son 2 bought her a beautiful mercedes with a chauffeur included, thinking this would surely win her approval.二儿子为她买了一辆漂亮的奔驰,还配了个司机。

他也觉得他一定会赢了。

son 3 had to do something even better, so he bought her a parrot that he had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire bible. you could ask the parrot any verse in the bible, and he could quote it word for word. what a gift that would be.老三为母亲买了一只鹦鹉。

这只鹦鹉接受了15年的训练,能一字不落地背诵整部圣经,并且不论你问他什么,他都能从圣经里原句引出。

well, the old lady went to the first son and said, "son, the house is just gorgeous, but it's really much too big for me. i only live in one room, and it's too large to clean and take care of. i really don't need the house, but thank you anyway." then she confronted her second son with, "son, the car is beautiful. it has everything you could ever want on it, but i don't drive and really don't like the chauffeur, so please returnthe car."这位老太太对他的第一个儿子说:“孩子,你买的房子很棒。

但是它太大了,我只能睡一间屋,还要花时间去打理剩下的房间,谢谢你,但我实在不需要它。

”接着她对二儿子说:“你的车也很好,再不能找到比那更棒的车了,但我不会开车,也不喜欢那个司机,所以你把它拿去推了吧!”next, she went to son 3 and said, "son, i just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. that chicken was delicious."最后,她对她的小儿子说:“孩子,我要感谢你最棒的礼物!那只鸡实在是美味啊!”关于高中英语幽默笑话故事<三>a farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. there was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. the motorist, in hurry, honked his horn ."if you don't back up," said the farmer, rolling up his sleeves, i won't like what i'm going to have to do." the surprised driver put his car in reverse and backed up two miles, allowing the horse and buggy to go by. "what was it you wouldn't have liked to have done back there?" asked the farmer's son."back up two miles," replied the farmer.一位农夫和他的儿子乘坐轻便马车来到一段窄路,他们遇到一个开车的人向相反的方向去。

两个方向的两英里以内都没有地方可以使他们相擦而过。

驾车人甚是着急,按响了喇叭。

“如果你不后退,”农夫说着撸起了袖子,“我可不喜欢我将不得不做的事。

”司机吃惊不小,挂上倒挡,向后退了两英里,让轻便马车先过去。

“刚才在那儿你说过的你不喜欢要做的事是什么?”农夫的儿子问道。

“退后两英里,”农夫回答道。

关于高中英语幽默笑话故事<四>graveyard scare140.墓地惊魂one dark night two guys were walking home after aparty and decided to take a shortcut through thecemetery.一个漆黑的夜晚,两个小伙子参加完聚会,决定抄近路穿过一片坟地走回家。

when they got to about the middle of the graveyard they were startled and stopped moving.there was this terrifying noise, "tap-tap-tap" coming from the shadows.走到坟地的中间,从阴暗处传出来恐怖的“嗒、嗒、嗒”声音,吓得他们再也走不动了。

trembling with fear, they spotted an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at oneof the headstones.浑身颤抖着,他们发现有个老人正拿着榔头和凿子凿一块墓碑。

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