【关于超简单的英语小笑话阅读】 最搞笑的简单英语笑话
英语笑话100篇【简单易懂英语笑话阅读】
竭诚为您提供优质的服务，优质的文档，谢谢阅读/双击去除英语笑话100篇【简单易懂英语笑话阅读】笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。
这其中的原因,不仅在于笑话能够折射出社会生活中的方方面面,而且在于,笑话可以在说笑中蕴含着人们对于美好生活的期盼和诉求。
小编精心收集了简单易懂英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!简单易懂英语笑话篇1Iwasoncetoldbyajapanesestudentthatthisisanoldstory.onesaturdayafternoonthegrasshopper,thesnail,andthec entipedeweresittingaroundthegrasshopper'shousedrink ingbeer.Theyranoutofbeerbeforetheywerereadytoquitdrinking,s otheydecidedoneofthemshouldgooutformorebeer.Thesnailsaid,"I'dgo,butI'mkindofslow.besides,grassh opper,thisisyourneighborhoodsoyouknowwheretogo."Thegrasshoppersaid,"Idon'tmindgoing,butmyhoppingwil lshakeupthebeerandwe'llgetsprayedeverytimeweopenone ."sotheydecidedtosendthecentipede;andthegrasshopperex plainedhowtogettothenearestliquorstore.Anhourorsopassedandstillthecentipedehadn'treturned, sothesnailandthegrasshopperdecidedtogolookforhim.Theygotasfarasthethefrontdoorandfoundthecentipedesi ttingthereputtingonhisshoes.submittedbyrodneyA.hoiseth-rothcorporation简单易懂英语笑话篇2Thisjokeneverfailstogetalaugh.Amanslowwittedmanwalkedintoapattentoffice.hewalkedu ptothepatentofficerandsaid,"hey,I'vegotanewideafora mousetrap."(Drawaboxontheblackboard.)"here'sthebox."(Drawaholeinthebox.)"here'sthehole." (Drawacircleinthebottomofthehole)"here'sthecheese." (Drawalineacrosstheholeinthebox.)"here'stheblade.Th emousestickshisheadintheholetogetthecheese,theblade dropsonhisneckandkillshim."Thepatentofficerlooksatthediagram.heunderstandsthat themanisalittleslowsohewantstobekind.heexplainstoth emanthathedoesnotthinkthedesignisreadytobepatentedy et.hetellstheman,"please,workonitsomemore.perhapsIw illbeabletopatentitanothertime."Theslowwittedmansaysthankyouandleavestheoffice.oneweeklatertheslowwittedmanshowsupagain.(Drawtheex actsameexampleontheboardinexactlythesameway.)Theslo wwittedmansays,"Thisisthebox,thisisthehole,thisisth echeeseandthisisthewire.Themousestickshisheadintheh oletogetthecheese,thewirewrapsaroundhisneckandkills him."Thepatentofficer,stilltryingtobekind,makesthesameex cuseasbefore.Theslowwittedmanleaves.oneweeklatertheslowwittedmanreturns.heapproachesthe samepattentofficerandsays,(Theexactsamethings)"here'sthebox.here'sthehole.(Thistimehedrawsazig-za glineacrosstheholeandhedoesnotdrawacircleforthechee se.)Aftercompletingthezig-zagline,theslowwittedmanp roclaims,"andhere'sthesawblade."Thepatentofficernoticesthedesignandthefactthatthatt herisnocheese.heaskstheslowwittedman,"where'stheche ese.""Ah-ha,"saystheslowwittedman."That'sthepoint.Themousestickshisheadinthehole andsays,""wheredidyouputthecheese."(whenthemousespeeksyoumustactlikethemouse.stickyour headoutasiflookingintothetrapandswingitbackandforthasiflookingforthecheese.)Theimplicationisthatthemousewillsawoffhisownheadwhi lelookingforthecheese.rememberthesawblade?submittedbyKarlhartman简单易懂英语笑话篇3AnlawyerAmericanlawyerinvitedaczechoslovakianfriend tostaywithhiminhismountaincabin.earlyinthemorning,t helawyerandhisczechoslovakianfriendwentouttopickber riesfortheirmorningbreakfast.Astheywerepickingblueb erries,alongcametwobigbears-amaleandafemale.Thelawyer,seeingthetwobears,climbedatree.hisfriendwasn'tsoluckyandthemalebearcaughthimandswa llowedhimwhole.Thelawyerdrovehiscartotownasfasthashecouldtogetapol iceman.Thepolicemantookhisgunandrantotheberrypatchw iththelawyer.sureenough,thetwobearswerestillthere."he'sinThATone !"saidthelawyer,pointingtothemale.Thepolicemanlookedatthebears,tookcarefulaimwithhisg un,andshoTTheFemALe."whatdidyoudothatfor!"shoutedthelawyer,"Isaidhewasi ntheotherbear!""exactly,"answeredthepoliceman."wouldyoubelievealaw yerwhotoldyouthattheczechwasinthemale?"(Thecheckisinthemail.)submittedbybonniep.简单易懂英语笑话篇4Amanwantedtobecomeamonksohewenttothemonasteryandtal kedtotheheadmonk.Theheadmonksaid:"youmusttakeavowofsilenceandcanonly saytwowordseverythreeyears."Themanagreedandafterthefirst3years,theheadmonkcamet ohimandsaid,"whatareyourtwowords?""Foodcold!",themanreplied.Threemoreyearswentbyandtheheadmonkcametohimandsaid" whatareyourtwowords?""robedirty!",themanexclaimed.Threemoreyearswentbyandtheheadmonkcametohimandsaid" whatareyourtwowords?""Iquit!",saidtheman."well,theheadmonkreplied,Iamnotsurprised.youhavedon enothingbutcomplaineversinceyougothere!"submittedbybonniep看了“简单易懂英语笑话”的人还看了：1.超简单的英语笑话阅读2.简单易懂的英语翻译笑话3.比较简单的英语笑话阅读4.简单易懂的英语笑话小短文5.简单易懂的英语小笑话最后，小编希望文章对您有所帮助，如果有不周到的地方请多谅解，更多相关的文章正在创作中，希望您定期关注。
简短搞笑英文小笑话阅读_英文笑话简短
简短搞笑英文小笑话阅读_英文笑话简短简短搞笑英文小笑话篇1Jimmy started painting when he was three years old, and when he was five, he was already verygood at it. He painted many beautiful and interesting pictures, and people paid a lot of moneyfor them. They said, This boys going to be famous when hes little older, and then were goingto sell these pictures for a lot more money.Jimmys pictures were different from other peoples because he never painted on all of thepaper. He painted on half of it, and the other half was always empty.Thats very clever, everyone said, Nobody elsedoes that!One day somebody bought one of Jimmyspictures and then said to him, Please tell methis,Jimmy. Why do you paint on the bottom half of your pictures, but not on the top half?Because Im small, Jimmy said, and my burshes dont reach very high.吉米三岁开头画画，五岁时已经画得很好了。
超搞笑的简单英语小笑话
超搞笑的简单英语小笑话超搞笑的简单英语小笑话笑话是幽默的一个属概念,具有幽默的一切特征。
笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。
店铺整理了超搞笑的简单英语小笑话，欢迎阅读! 超搞笑的简单英语小笑话篇一When we decided to sell our house, we nailed "FOR SALE BY OWNER" signs on two trees in our front yard. Before long，the doorbell rang.”How much are you asking for the treesp"a young man asked.我们决定卖掉我们的房子。
于是，我们就在院前的大树上钉了两块牌子，上面写着:“拍卖。
”没过多久，我们的门铃就响了。
一位年轻人问:“你们的树想卖多少钱?”超搞笑的简单英语小笑话篇二Some friends and I stopped at an ice-cream parlor.where I asked for my favorite，a hot-fudge sundae with chocolate ice cream. But when the waitress brought our orders，I saw that mine had vanilla ice cream. " I ordered chocolate,"I pointed out.我和一位朋友来到一家冰淇琳店。
我要了一个我最喜欢吃的巧克力奶油圣代。
当女招待送来我的冰淇淋时，我发现我的冰淇沐是香草的。
我说:“我要的是巧克力的。
”The young woman consulted her order pad and responded，"So you did. I'll take it back and get chocolate."那位年轻的女士查了一下订单回答说:“你确实要的是巧克力的。
英语小笑话
英语小笑话（经典版）编制人：__________________审核人：__________________审批人：__________________编制单位：__________________编制时间：____年____月____日序言下载提示：该文档是本店铺精心编制而成的，希望大家下载后，能够帮助大家解决实际问题。
文档下载后可定制修改，请根据实际需要进行调整和使用，谢谢!并且，本店铺为大家提供各种类型的经典范文，如工作总结、工作计划、策划方案、规章制度、合同协议、条据文书、心得体会、教学资料、作文大全、其他范文等等，想了解不同范文格式和写法，敬请关注!Download tips: This document is carefully compiled by this editor. I hope that after you download it, it can help you solve practical problems. The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!Moreover, our store provides various types of classic sample essays for everyone, such as work summaries, work plans, planning plans, rules and regulations, contract agreements, documents, experiences, teaching materials, complete essays, and other sample essays. If you want to learn about different sample formats and writing methods, please pay attention!英语小笑话英语小笑话（通用20篇）英语小笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁，是一种重要的交际手段。
超简短的英文笑话
超简短的英文笑话超简短的英文笑话（精选5篇）超简短的英文笑话1On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上，幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。
班上最小的女孩说，她希望舞蹈演员可以长得更高一点儿，那么他们就不用整天踮着脚尖了。
超简短的英文笑话2Professor: When is your birthday?Kid: May 30.Professor: Which year?Kid: Every year.教授：你的生日是什么时候?孩子：5月30日。
教授：哪一年?孩子：每年都是。
超简短的英文笑话3Before the final examination, T om told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that Id passed todays exam.""Dont trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope Ill fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前，汤姆告诉他的母亲：“妈妈，我昨天晚上做了一个梦，梦见我通过了今天的考试。
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇，欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一：Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。
The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。
过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。
The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上，先生。
”那小男孩说。
英语爆笑笑话二：太黑了，看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。
英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)
英语幽默笑话（优秀10篇）英国人有他们独特的英式幽默，他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑，今天，小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话，希望大家能开心开心，一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：吠狗不咬人。
;”“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样？”“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。
”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。
简短有趣的英文笑话大全
简短有趣的英文笑话大全冷笑话是近几年新兴的一种语言现象,它轻松诙谐、别具一格,给我们紧张的生活增添了几分轻松的情趣,它一出现便受到了大多数人的喜爱。
店铺整理了简短有趣的英文笑话，欢迎阅读!简短有趣的英文笑话篇一好消息和坏消息An artist asked the gallery ownerif there had been any interestin his paintings currently ondisplay.一名艺术家问画廊老板，最近有没有人对他展出的画感兴趣。
"I've got good news and bad news,"owner replied.“这有好消息和坏消息，”老板回答。
"The good news is thata gentleman inquired about your workand wondered if it wouldappreciate in value after your death.“好消息是有一位先生咨询你的作品，他想知道在你死后你的画会不会升值。
When I told him it would,he bought all fifteen of your paintings.我告诉他你的画会升值，他就把你的15幅画全都买走了。
”"That's wonderful!"the artist exclaimed,"What's the bad news?"“真是太好了”，艺术家是喜形于色，“那坏消息是什么?”With concern, the gallery owner replied,"The guy was your doctor."带着关心的口吻，画廊老板回答，“买画的人是你的医生”。
简短有趣的英文笑话篇二倒霉的一天There was a guy in a bar, just looking at his drink.一个男人坐在酒吧里，看着自己的酒发呆。
英语简单小笑话带翻译
英语简单小笑话带翻译英语简单小笑话带翻译（精选6篇）看了这些笑话，除了使你开怀大笑、忘却烦忧之外，还能让你在各个场合得心应手，轻易营造欢乐气氛，成为众人目光焦点。
从笑话中学习英语，轻松自在，让你充满自信、左右逢源。
下面是店铺整理的英语简单小笑话带翻译的内容，一起来看看吧。
英语简单小笑话带翻译篇1After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?"After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢？” 过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。
”英语简单小笑话带翻译篇2Young hopeful：“Father，what is a traitor in politics？” Father（a veteran politician）：“A traitor is a man who leaves our party and goes over to the other one．”Young hopeful：“Well then，what is a man who leaves his party and comes over to yours？” Father：“A convert，my son．”有希望的青年人：“父亲，什么叫政治叛徒？” 父亲（一位老资格的政治家）：“叛徒指的是离开我们党而加入到另一个党的'人。
英语搞笑笑话6篇
英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中，它是笑话的精料，智慧之所在。
笑话是幽默的载体，一个成功的笑话能流传千古。
下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一：How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了，在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人，我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。
孩子们齐声回答：“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂，给院子的草坪割草，并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁，我会上天堂吗?”回答还是：“不能!”“好吧，”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道：“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二：I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。
简单易懂的英文小笑话欣赏
简单易懂的英文小笑话欣赏笑话大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象,具有讽刺性和娱乐性。
店铺整理了简单易懂的英文小笑话，欢迎阅读!简单易懂的英文小笑话篇一Look at My Socks瞧瞧我的袜子"Say, that's an interesting pair of socks you've got on, Charlie, one green and one red. "“嘿，查理，你穿的这双袜子真有趣，一只绿色一只红色。
”"Yeah, and I've got another pair just like it at home."“是吗，我家里还有一双同样的袜子呢。
”简单易懂的英文小笑话篇二许个愿吧Every morning on his way to work, a business man passed a house where he saw a woman beating her looy on the head with a loaf of bread.每天早晨一位商人在上班途中都会经过一户人家，他总是看见一个女人用一条面包打她儿子的头部。
But on this particular day, he noticed that she was hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake.但今天却比较特别，他发现她正用一块巧克力蛋糕打他的头。
Unable to restrain his curiosity, he rang the doorbell and the woman answere .他忍不住好奇，便按了那户人家的门铃。
女人听了铃声，出来开门。
"Madam, I couldn't help but notice that every day you beat your child with a loaf of bread. . . "“这位太太，每天经过这里我都忍不住会注意到你用一条面包打你儿子……”"That's true .""那倒是不假……""And yet today I observed that you were hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake. ',"可是今天我却看见你用一块巧克力蛋糕打他。
【关于英语笑话短故事阅读】20个英语笑话爆笑超短
【关于英语笑话短故事阅读】20个英语笑话爆笑超短英语笑话不仅搞笑，还能揭示发人深省的至理箴言。
本文是关于英语笑话短故事，希望对大家有帮助!关于英语笑话短故事：A Good BoyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents. “What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?””I gave it to a poor old woman,” he answered.”You're a good boy,” said the mother proudly. “Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?””She is the one who sells the candy.”好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
昨天给你的钱干什么了?我给了一个可怜的老太婆，他回答说。
你真是个好孩子，妈妈骄傲地说。
再给你两分钱。
可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?她是个卖糖果的。
关于英语笑话短故事：I Have His Ear in My PocketIvan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, “What happened?””A kid bit me,” replied Ivan.”Would you recognize him if you saw him again?” asked his mother.”I'd know him any where,” said Ivan. “I have his ear in my pocket.”他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
他妈妈问，发生了什么事?一个男孩咬了我一口，伊凡说。
简单幽默英语小笑话 (细选3篇)
简单幽默英语小笑话(细选3篇)简单幽默英语小笑话1There once was a young couple who lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors' houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.So one day the wife went to the pet store and said, “I need a good guard dog.”And the clerk replied, “Sorry, we're all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he knows karate.”The wife didn't believe him so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair.”The dog went up to the chair and broke it into pieces, then he said to the dog, “Karate that table.” The dog went up to the table and broke it in half.So the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a big guard dog. But then she told her husband that it knew karate, and he said “Karate my ass!”简单幽默英语小笑话2Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"The first kid says, "A circumcision."And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"简单幽默英语小笑话3Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.Hot Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and tiny tissues.Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.Flabby Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with thesenew, roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too-muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.Bunion Barbie. Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.No-More-Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.Mid-life Cr Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal trainer)is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B别睡在庙里，因为跑得了和尚跑不了庙!初恋防震最佳，因为爱情像雨像雾又像风。
英语小笑话,英语笑话大全（带翻译）
英语小笑话,英语笑话大全（带翻译）下面是编辑整理的英语小笑话，希望能让您捧腹大笑!英语小笑话【一】1、The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译：鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安? 老师发问道。
把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。
小女孩回答道。
2、律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off"翻译：一个律师打开他的宝马车门，突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了，警察赶到现场，律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。
“警察同志，看看他们把我的车弄的”律师哀怨地说。
一分钟英语小笑话大全
一分钟英语小笑话大全篇一：英语幽默小笑话大全英语幽默小笑话大全1.a kissAt a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word “KISS” scribbl ed on it.The guest seated next to the speaker said, “Your wife must love you very much, I see her send you a ‘KISS’ before you begin your speech.”The speaker smiled and explained, “You don’t know my wife. The ‘KISS’ she give me stands for ‘Keep It Short, Stupid.’”2.A teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, “Everyone who thinks you’re stupid, stand up!”Little Johnny then stood up.The teacher said, “Do you think you’re stupid, Johnny?”“No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!”一个老师在对学生们讲心理学，“谁认为自己蠢就站起来？”她一开始就说。
幽默英文小笑话
幽默英文小笑话笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。
在俄罗斯文化中,笑话一直都具有无法替代的特殊意义。
下面是店铺带来的幽默英文小笑话，欢迎阅读!幽默英文小笑话篇一Problem with Gas放屁的问题A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent.有位小老太太去看医生：“医生，我有爱放屁的毛病。
其实也不是大问题，只是我放屁不臭而且没声音。
As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent."事实上，我在这里已经放了20多个屁，但是你并不知道对吧，因为我的屁不臭，而且还没声音。
”The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week."医生说：“好的，我明白了。
吃这个药片，一天三次连续吃七天，下星期你再来。
”The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly."一星期后老太太来了，“医生，你到底给的我什么药，现在我放屁还是没声音，但是怎么这么臭!”The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."医生说：“太好了!你的嗅觉正常了，现在开始治听觉。
英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读
英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读多阅读一些有趣的英语笑话，能激起我们阅读英语的兴趣，从而提高英语的阅读能力，今天店铺在这里为大家分享英语搞笑笑话10篇，欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话篇一An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter，the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said：“Good evening，professor.How are you? “Well，” answered the professor，“I thought I was all right when I left home，but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.”有一天，人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走，他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里，另一只脚踩在人行道上。
一个碰见他的学生说：“晚安，老师。
您怎么了?” “啊，”这位老师回答说：“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的，可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。
我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。
”英语搞笑笑话篇二It's His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys.They were brothers，and they often had fights with each other. Last Saturday their mother said to them，“I'm going to cook our lunch now.Go out and play in the garden—and be goo d.” “Yes，Mummy，” the two boys answered，and they went out. They played in the garden for half an hour，and then Billy ran into the kitchen.“Mummy，” he said，“Bobby's broken a window in Mrs.Allen's house.” Mrs.Allen was one of their neighbors. “He's a bad boy，”his mother said.“How did he break it?” “I threw a stone at him，” Billy answered，“and he quickly moved down.”比利和波比都是小男孩。
关于非常简单的英语笑话
关于非常简单的英语笑话幽默与笑话是人们生活中的精神乐趣,是人们智慧与文化的结晶。
下面是店铺带来的关于非常简单的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!关于非常简单的英语笑话篇一高尔夫球手(双语)Once there was a golfer whose ball landed on ananthill.从前有个高尔夫球手，他把球打到了一座蚁丘上。
Rather than move the ball, he decided to hit it whereit lay. He gave a mighty swing. Clouds of dirt andsand and ants exploded from the spot. Everythingmoved but the golf ball. It sat on the same spot.他没有移动球的位置，而是决定就地击球。
于是他使劲一挥球杆，尘土和着蚂蚁，四处飞扬。
所有的东西都动了，除了那只球，它呆在原地，一动没动。
So he tried another shot. Clouds of dirt and sandants went flying again. The golf ball didn't even wiggle.于是，他准备再次出击。
又是一阵尘土飞扬，蚂蚁们也再次跟着遭殃。
而高尔夫球还是纹丝不动。
Two ants survived. One dazed ant said to the other. "Whoa! What are we going to do?"两只蚂蚁幸免于难，一只晕晕乎乎地对另一只说：“哇，我们怎么办啊?”Said the other ant, "I don't know about you, but I'm going to get on the ball."另一只蚂蚁说：“我不知道你怎么想，但是我准备爬到那只球上去。
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【关于超简单的英语小笑话阅读】最搞笑的简单英语笑话
笑话能够使人们开怀大笑。
俗话说“笑一笑，十年少”!因此笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。
小编整理了关于超简单的英语小笑话，欢迎阅读!
关于超简单的英语小笑话篇一
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma’am, we haven’t had any for a while, and itdoesn’t look as if we’ll be getting s oon.
一个商店经理听见一个店员对顾客说：不，夫人，这会儿没有，一时半会儿看来也不会有。
Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we’ll havesomesoon, we placed an order last week.
经理惊恐万分地跑到顾客跟前说：当然，马上就会有的。
我们上周订了货。
Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything saywe’ve got it on order and it’s what was it she wanted?
然后经理把店员拉到一边：千万，千万，千万不要说我们没有什么，说我们已经订了货，货马上就到。
现在你说她要买什么?
Rain, said the clerk.
雨，店员说。
关于超简单的英语小笑话篇二
One day, Tim’s mathematics teacher l ooked at his homework and saw that he had got all hissums right.
一天，蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业，发现他全做对了。
The teacher was very pleased and rather surprised.
老师很高兴，同时也十分惊讶。
He called Tim to his desk and said to him, “You got all your homework right this time, Tim. Whathappened? Did your father help you?”
他把蒂姆叫到桌前说：”蒂姆，你这次的作业全都做对了，怎么回事?你爸爸帮你做了吗?”
”No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself,” said Tim.”
”不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做。
”关于超简单的英语小笑话篇三
Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. Whatwere you doing last term?
父亲：我曾向你许诺，如果你考试及格就给你买俩小汽车，可你却未能做到。
你上学期一直在干什么呀?
Son: I was learning to drive a car.
儿子：我在学开汽车。