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中国式搞笑英语句子精选

中国式搞笑英语句子精选笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。

小编精心收集了中国式搞笑英语句子，供大家欣赏学习!中国式搞笑英语句子11、中文：景区花木期盼您的呵护英文：Trees and flowers await your love翻译：树和花等待着你的爱2、中文：近期发现有以各种借口电话邀约打牌、诈骗住店宾客钱财，望宾客提高警惕。

英文：Please don't accept strangler's invitation, so as not to be cheated.翻译：请不要接受扼杀者的邀请，以防被骗。

3、中文：残疾人专用英文：Special for deformed翻译：特殊为了畸形人4、中文：女界英文：Women Kingdom翻译：女人王国5、中文：试戴请让营业员协助英文：Please don't touch yourself. Let us help you to try out. Thanks!翻译：请别抚摸自己(自慰)。

让我们来帮你。

谢谢!6、中文：男性英文：Male Man翻译：男性男人7、中文：狮子王英文：Loin King翻译：腰部王(或作：生殖器王)8、中文：钢琴教师联络本英文：Piano Teachers' Intercourse Book翻译：钢琴教师性交本9、中文：在此盥洗台，请勿洗发或洗衣服等。

英文：No washing hair or clothes in the toilet please.翻译：请勿在马桶里洗发或洗衣服。

中国式搞笑英语句子21、有次房东问我:“Did you eat anything yet?”我说：“no.”她听后重复了一遍：“So you didn’t eat anything.”我答道：“Yes...?”房东老太太犹豫了一下，又问：“Did you eat?”我又答道：“No.”她接着说：“So you didn’t eat……?”我说：“Yes...?”估计房东太太当时都快要崩溃了……2、wetwo who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿3、howare you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你?4、youdon’t bird me,I don’t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你5、youhave seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers !together up !你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上!6、helloeverybody! if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,gohome!!有事起奏，没事退朝，回家?7、youme you me彼此彼此8、YouGive Me Stop!!你给我站住!9、knowis know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知...10、WATCHSISTER表妹11、dragonborn dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞!12、AmericanChinese not enough美中不足13、onecar come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述14、heartflower angry open心花怒放15、gopast no mistake past走过路过，不要错过中国式搞笑英语句子3小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

中式搞笑英文

1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！4．as far as you go to die有多远，死多远！！！！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’’son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11.．I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸12．one car comeone car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I haveone!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

中式英语搞笑句子精选

中式英语搞笑句子精选1. I'm late for the party, sorry for the inconveniently.2. I can't come to work today. I have a small issue with my stomach. My feeling is very unappetizing, so I can't carry my body to work.3. Don't worry about failing the test, as our great philosopher Confucius once said, "the person who never made a mistake never tried anything new".4. Teacher, I have a question. If a cat closes its eyes, is it just to rest or is it pretending to cut-off from this world?5. My English is so good, it's reaching for the sky and leaping into the sea!6. I went to a restaurant yesterday and ordered a bowl of "nothing special" noodle soup. It tasted just like regular noodle soup, but without the special.7. Last night, I had a dream that my phone fell into the toilet and when I woke up, it was still there. I guess I must have been sleep-dialing.8. I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it!9. I asked my Chinese friend if he knows Kung Fu, he replied, "Of course, I Kung Fu breakfast, Kung Fu lunch, and Kung Fu dinner!"10. I tried learning Chinese, but it's so confusing. How can "beef" and "cow" be the same word? I guess it's a moo-stake in translation.。

关于中国式搞笑英语笑话

20XX年关于中国式搞笑英语笑话在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。

本文是关于中国式搞笑英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇一we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你?you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ! together up !你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上!hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝you me you me彼此彼此1/ 5You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住!know is know noknow is noknowheart flower angry open心花怒放go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条I call Li old big. toyear 25.笑死人不偿命的中国式英语笑话笑话大全我叫李老大，今年25。

you have two down son。

你有两下子。

as far as you go to die2/ 5有多远，死多远!!!!I give you face you don’’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇二有次房东问我:“Did you eat anything yet?”我说：“no.”她听后重复了一遍：“So you didn’t eat anything.”我答道：“Yes...?”房东老太太犹豫了一下，又问：“Did you eat?”我又答道：“No.”她接着说：“So you didn’t eat……?”我说：“Yes...?”估计房东太太当时都快要崩溃了……关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇三go and look!走着瞧good good study,day day up好好学习天天向上No Mao ze dong ,no new china没有毛没有新中国go a head! 去个头!People mountain peole sea!人山人海3/ 5give you some color see see!!给你点颜色看看no three no four 不三不四no money no women no good(哈，这是谁说的)we two who and who?我们俩谁跟谁dog day“"""s狗日的poor light egg穷光蛋if you tiger me ,i will mountain you如果你唬我我就煽你you don""""t bird me,I don""""t bird you你不鸟我我也不鸟你full clear ten big cool punishment满清十大酷刑love his mother who who who爱他妈谁谁谁KILL ONE POLICE *****杀一警百i s h i t love you我便爱上了你banana fish相交于f u c k do system操作系统horse horse tiger tiger马马虎虎fish yes于是your grandma""""s legs你奶奶个腿King eight egg***5 talks, 4 beauties 3 loves五讲四美三热爱4/ 5give me take down!给我拿下WATCH SISTER 表妹your grandma""""s bear你奶奶个熊yellow fly red黄飞鸿red face know to me红颜知己American Chinese not enough美中不足pig wood wolf house bee!珠慕朗玛峰You really have two down sons你真有两下子round son egg原子弹chicken gun ice机枪兵water sex poplar flower水性杨花How are you? 怎么是你?How old are you? 怎么老是你?5/ 5。

十大爆笑中式英语

5
进入寝室的网线插在路由器的WAN口上，在从路由器的LAN口接出两根网线，分别插在两台电脑上
打开一台电脑，打开IE浏览器，在地址栏输入192.168.1.1回车（有的路由器是192.168.0.1，在路由器背面一般都标注，自己看一下），在打开的页面中找有DHCP字样的选项，进入后启动里面的DHCP服务，再把两台电脑的TCP/IP属性中的几个选项都设为“自动获取”（方法：右键点击“网上邻居”，选“属性”，右键点击“本地连接”属性，“此连接使用下列项目”框中找“internet协议（TCP/IP）”双击，最后“确定”关闭）
① 修理 ② mend ③ fix/repair
① 入口 ② way in ③ entrance
① 出口 ② way out ③ exit(way out在口语中是crazy的意思)
① 勤奋 ② diligent ③ hardworking/studious/conscientious
① 好吃 ② delicious ③ good/nice/tasty/appetizing(delicious在中国被滥用)
① 尽我最大努力 ② try my best ③ try/strive(try的本意就是try my best)
① 有名 ② famous ③ well-known/renowned/legendary/popular(famous在中国被滥用)
if you want life, i have one
① 欢迎你到... ② welcome you to ... ③ welcome to...
① 永远记住你 ② remember you forever ③ always remember you(没有人能活到forever)

50个经典搞笑中式英语

50个经典搞笑中式英语最全搞笑中式英语大集合1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed ，I will give you some color to see see 你有种，我要给你点颜色看看5．Government abuse chicken 宫暴鸡丁6．At KFC, We do Chichen Right 在肯德基，我们做鸡是对的7．You Give Me Stop! 你给我站住！8．Chop the strange fish 生鱼块9．watch sister 表妹10．take iron coffee 拿铁咖啡11．American Chinese not enough 美中不足12．Where cool where you stay！哪凉快上哪呆着13．heart flower angry open 心花怒放14．colour wolf 色狼15．dry goods 干货16．want money no; want life one! 要钱没有，要命一条17．People mountain and people sea. 人山人海18．you have two down son。

你有两下子。

19．let the horse come on 放马过来20．I give you face you don’t wanna face 给你脸你不要脸21．red face know me 红颜知己22．seven up eight down 七上八下23．no three no four 不三不四24．do morning 做早操；do class between 做课间操25．you try try see！你试试看！26．love who who 爱谁谁27．look through autumn water 望穿秋水28．go you mother's 去你妈29．May I borrow your light？借光30．Handsome Year, Morning Die 英年早逝31．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’son can make hole!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞32．morning three night four 朝三暮四33．king eight eggs 王八蛋34．no care three seven twenty one 不管三七二十一35．go and look 走着瞧36．poor light egg 穷光蛋37．ice snow clever 冰雪聪明38．first see you，i love you 第一次见你，我便爱上了你39．horse horse tiger tiger 马马虎虎40．no money no talk 没钱免谈41．hello everybody! if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝42．you me you me 彼此彼此43．know is know，noknow is noknow 知之为知之，不知为不知... 44．watch sisiter 表妹45．American Chinese not enough 美中不足46．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述47．go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过48．小明：I am sorry! 老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three! 老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!49．If you want money,I have no; if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条50．I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。

十大爆笑中式英语PPT课件

第6页/共6页
009 After you. A: Please come in. • B: After you.
• 010 Nonsense! A: Tell me the truth. I don't w ant
nonsense.
• B: I am telling the truth.
•
• 011 Cheer up!
• A: We lost the game again!
• B: Cheer up! You’ll do better next time.
012 No way! A: Let’s have pizza for lunch.
• B: No way! I hate pizza.
第5页/共6页
感谢您的观看！
pengpeng,one car died! • two cars move towards each
other ,suddenly they get in a crash and many people get injured, with somebody even dying • 9. people mountain people sea • huge crowds of people • 10. If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! • I have nothing but a life to spare only!
十大爆笑中式英语
第1页/共6页
• 1. Good good study, day day up. • 2. How are you? How old are you? • how could it be you，how could it always be

中式英语的笑话

中式英语的笑话Chinglish,即"中式英语"。

学习者在写作中往往先用汉语打腹稿，或列出中文提纲，再把汉语一句句机械地转换成英语，带有明显的汉语痕迹，因而不能被以英语为母语者所接受。

中式英语指带有中文语音、语法、词汇特色的英语，是一种洋泾浜语言。

中式英语在英语被称为“Chinglish”，是汉语及英语的英文混合而成的合体字。

请看下面有关中式英语的小笑话1．we two who and who!咱俩谁跟谁啊！2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你？怎么老是你？3．you have seed，I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们！一起上！4．as far as you go to die！有多远死多远！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝！！6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！！8．know is know ，noknow is noknow...知之为知之，不知为不知…9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse‟son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11.．I give you face you don‟t wanna face,you lose your face ,I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

十大爆笑中式英语 ppt课件

• 10. If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!
• I have nothing but a life to spare only!
十大爆笑中式英语
3
英语常用语排行榜
• 001 See you later.
• A: I have to go. • B: See you later.
十大爆笑中式英语
十大爆笑中式英语
1
• 1. Good good study, day day up. • 2. How are you? How old are you? • how could it be you，how could it always be you • You! You again! • 3. You have seed. I will give you some color to see
• B: I mean it.
005 Check, please. A: Check, please. • B: Yes, sir.ness.
A: What were you talking about? • B: Mind your own business.
十大爆笑中式英语
4
十大爆笑中式英语
2
• 6.No three, no four.
• indecent /dubious
• 7. Horse horse tiger tiger
• Just so-so. /Nothing special. /careless
• 8. One car come,one car go,two car pengpeng,one car died!

最搞笑中式英语

最搞笑中式英语
中式英语是指中国人在使用英语时，由于语言和文化差异而产生的一些滑稽和有趣的表达方式。

下面是一些最搞笑的中式英语表达：
1. No money, no talk.（没有钱，就别废话）
2. You take my money and I give you silence.（你拿了我的钱，我给你沉默）
3. The meat is like my heart, soft and hard to blow.（肉就像我的心，柔软却难以吹）
4. Don't copy my face.（不要照搬我的脸）
5. He jump out, scare me one big jump.（他跳出来，把我吓了一个大跳）
6. You play me, play dead better.（你玩我，装死会更好）
7. I'm busy in a pan.（我在锅里忙）
8. Yesterday vomit today.（昨天呕吐，今天）
9. Hello, may I disturb you?（你好，可以抢劫一下吗？）
10. My English is poor, sorry, I speak Chinese better.（我的英语很差，对不起，我说中文更好）
这些表达方式不仅直接，而且常常使用了不恰当或者直译的词语，使得整个表达更加幽默滑稽。

中式英语因此也成为了一种独特的文化现象，在国际间产生了广泛的笑料。

但是，需要注意的是，这些表达方式并不正确，只是用来搞笑并展示语言和文化差异。

中式英语搞笑神翻译

芝士就是力量 --- 培根
03
Wake Me Up When September Ends 一觉睡到国庆节
04
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit； Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
知识就是你应该把鸡蛋放进篮子里智慧则是不要把所有鸡蛋都放进同一个篮子里
05
The last thing I want to do is to hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
我真不想伤害你，但你也别逼我。
06
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
被刷屏的英语神翻译
据说看到这里的人，都流下了感动的泪水因为他们终于知道为什么自己看电影学不好英语了
01
达则兼济天下，穷则独善其身 Fuck the world if you are rich; otherwise fuck yourself.
02
knowledge is power. --- Bacon
宁愿闭嘴当傻B，也别瞎BB！
ห้องสมุดไป่ตู้7
08
You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains. You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines. You say that you love the wind, but you close your windows when wind blows. This is why I am afraid; You say that you love me, too.

中式英语幽默

1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11．American Chinese not enough美中不足12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。

四级考试搞笑的中式英语

四级考试搞笑的中式英语
四级考试中常见的中式英语，让人捧腹大笑。

大家来看看其中的几个经典例子吧！
1. '小心地滑'（Be careful slippery）
这是一个常见的“中式英语”，其正确表达应该是“Be careful, it's slippery”。

2. '这个问题很难顶'（This problem is hard to top）
这个表达也很有趣，正确的表达应该是“This problem is difficult to deal with”。

3. '我很不开心'（I am very not happy）
这样的表达方式是中式英语的典型代表，正确的表达应该是“I am very unhappy”。

4. '你有病吧'（You have a disease）
这个表达方式貌似是生病的意思，其实正确的表达方式应该是“You must be crazy”。

以上这些中式英语都是在四级考试中常见的，大家在考试的时候一定要注意语法以及表达方式的正确性，避免被扣分。

- 1 -。

爆笑英语翻译

「中国英文」Chinese EnglishChinglish “地道中文”的搞笑英语翻译1.we two who and who咱俩谁跟谁阿2.You give me stop你给我站住3Good good study,day day up好好学习天天向上4.Icall Liold bigtoyear25我叫李老大今年256.you have two down son你有两下子7.You ask me,I ask who你问我,我去问谁8.People mountain and people sea.人山人海 9.seven up eight down 七上八下10.no three no four不三不四 11. Moon under old man 月下老人12.Open the door see mountain开门见山 13. pen see you 鄙视你14.Five flowers eight doors五花八门15.I’ll give you some color to see see我要给你点颜色看看1.王八蛋：wang eight eggs2.白痴：White eat3.吃白食：eat white food4.红颜知己：red face know me5.老表：old watch6.表妹：watch sister7.别唬我：don’t tiger me 8.狗娘养的：dog mother born9.作早操：do early fuck 10.不三不四：no three no four11.马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger 12. 你给我站住：you give me stop13.你他妈的：you he mother’s 14.你问我我去问谁：you ask me,me ask who15.猪头三去死吧：pig head 3,go dead 16.朝三暮四：morning three night four17.怎么是你：how are you 18. how old are you怎么老是你19.要钱不给,要命有一条：want money no, want life one20.三人行,必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher1.各位知不知道“让广州充满爱”的官方翻译—Let’s make love everywhere in our Guangzhou2.你也许已走出我的视线,但从未走出我的思念You may be out of my sight,but never out of my mind 3怀才像怀孕时间长才能看到Having knowledge likes having pregnantit takes times to beawareness 4.妈妈说人最好不要错过两样东西,最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人. Mom said you’d better not miss two things , the last bus to home and the person who loves you deeply.5.萝卜青菜,各有所爱;误 Some prefer radish but others prefer cabbage.正 Tastes differ;No dish suits all tastes 或You can never make everyone happy6.他一向嘴硬,从不认错;误 He has always got a hard mouth and never admit a fault.正 He never says uncle.注：当一方想制服另一方时就用命令说：“Say uncle” “服输”,而not say uncle 就是“嘴硬”7.同学们都很讨厌他,因为他经常拍老师的马屁;误 The students all dislike him because he often pats the teacher's ass.正 The students all dislike him because he often licks the teacher's boots.注：以前在欧洲,臣民见到国王与王后往往要亲吻他们的靴子;后来,人们将lick the boots 引申汉语的“拍马屁”;在美国英语中,“拍马屁”还有另一种说法polish the apple,学生用擦亮的苹果来讨好老师;8.你听说了吗迈克把他的女朋友给甩了;误 Have you ever heard that Mike broke up with his girlfriend正 Have you ever heard that Mike dumped his girlfriend注：break up with sb. 虽然表示“与某人分手了”,并没说明是谁先提出来的;而dump 指“倾倒垃圾”,这里则表示像倒垃圾一样地甩掉;9.人都是这山望着那山高,对自己的现状没有满意的时候;误 Almost all people think that the other mountain is higher than the one he's standing on. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.正 Almost all people think that the grass is greener on the other hill. They never feel satisfied with what they've already got.注：“这山望着那山高”是指人不满足于现状的心理,它在英语中已经有了现成的说法,即the grass is greener on the other hill他山的草更绿,因此我们借用即可,10. “big river goes to the east,all the star follows beidou”,这句英文大意就是：大河向东流,天上的星星参北斗;这首“洋气十足”的好汉歌的英文版挟着天雷滚滚而来.11. 人山人海：有人直译为：People mountain people sea. 这就是「中国英文」,老外很难理解;他们指「人多」时,通常只说：「There is a large crowd of people.」12. 天下无不散的宴席：有人直译为：There are no feasts in the world which do not break up at last. All good things come to an end. 意思是：所有好的事情,总有结束的一天;China：拆哪儿查哪儿圈哪儿切哪儿亲哪儿去哪儿吃哪儿钱儿呢English:应给利息,阴沟里洗,硬改历史,妈妈,我不想学英语了,因为老师不靠谱,还老教我们骂人：他说今天是Today,昨天也是yestoday; 他一会儿说Yes,一会儿说Nice, 一会儿说Bus,一会儿说Goose, 最后还说都guess中式英语按照拼音的顺序排了出来,如下表;1.What the fuck is going on到底他妈的怎么回事2.You son of bitch你个狗娘养的3."同学是某偏远地区的,英语发音一直不标准,老师英文也是发不准,所以学生更是一口地道的土腔英语;话说同学的妹妹刚上初一,学英语的积极性狂高,每天早晨天不亮就开始朗读单词,这天像往常一样,继续拼命的读,他爹就蹲在窗户底下抽烟袋;小妹妹念“hands音:汉子,hands”,“two hands偷汉子;他爹听完就止不住的皱眉,一大早就听见闺女要偷汉子,心想怪不得听说外国人开放,书上都这么写;小妹妹继续读“hands,hands,two hands偷汉子” I have two hands.;汉子,偷汉子,俺还偷汉子4.话说一个国内知名企业,一天来了一个重要的外宾,下面是前台的对话;前台小姐：“hello.”你好;美国人：“hi.”你好;前台小姐：“you have what thing”你有什么事情美国人：“can you speak English”你能和我说英语吗前台小姐：“if i not speak English,i am speaking what”如果我不是在说英语,那我在说什么呢美国人：“can anybody else speak English”这里有别的人能说英语吗前台小姐：“you yourself look,all people are playing ,no people have time,you can wait,you wait, you not wait,you go”.你自己看看,所有的人都在忙着,没有人有时间,你能等你就等,你不能等你说走美国人：“good heavens. anybody here can speak English”我的天啦,这里没有人能讲英语吗前台小姐：“shout what shout,quiet a little,you have what thing”嚷什么嚷,安静一点,你还有什么事情美国人：“i want to speak to your head.”我要找你们的头儿;前台小姐：“head notzai . you tomorrow come”头不在,你明天来5..小明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet 老师说：Goa head.小明就坐了下来;过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说：May I go to the toilet 老师说：Goa head.小明又坐了下来;他旁边的同学于是忍不住问：你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗怎么不去小明说：你没听老师说「去你个头」啊6.某女领导会见外宾,要求翻译要严格按她的意思翻,不许走样;外宾一见到女士,立刻按照西方的习惯拍马屁道："Miss,you are very beautiful."翻译照翻,领导心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下：“哪里,哪里”;翻译不敢怠慢,把她的话翻成英文："Where Where"外宾一愣,干脆马屁拍到底："Every where, every where;"翻译：“你到处都很漂亮;”领导更高兴了,但总是要客气一下：“不见得,不见得”;翻译赶紧翻成英文："You are not all owed to see , you are not all owed to see."7.某男,亦粗通英文,至使馆,有表要填,有一栏是：Sex,该男久思,毅然下笔：“Once a week”;签证官观后暴笑,曰：“This item should be filled in with male or female.”该男顿时赧颜,思之,填下“female”;官楞之,曰：“shouldn’t it be male”男急释曰：“I am a normal man , so I have sex with female.”8.小强去看电影,到了电影售票处,发现一个老外和售票小姐连说带比得好半天,就自告奋勇的上前做翻译,售票小姐说：麻烦你告诉她,现在坐票售完了只剩下站票,如果要看要站着看;小强转头就对老外说：no sit see, stand see. if see stand see.老外回答说：sorry I don’t understand your English.小强就对售票小姐说：哦,他说他不懂英文.......9.下面是一位朋友在各个银行之间为了一点存款的事,折腾了好半天,结果是一事无成;去了中国建设银行,CBCConstruction Bank of China,营业员问,“存不存”后面是中国银行的同志,BCBank of China,回答道“不存;”中国农业银行的同志说,ABCAgriculture Bank of China,“啊,不存”;中国工商银行的同志来火了,ICBCIndustry and Commercial Bank of China,“爱存不存”;民生银行听了,CMSBChina Min sheng Bank,接上话,“存吗傻比”招商银行,CMBC,也应答道,“存吗白痴”这位顾客火了,我的事关你啥事我去兴业银行,CIB,“存一百”;国家开发银行的同志听了,CDBChina Development Bank,在我们这里也,“存点吧”北京市商业银行的同志说了,BCCBBeijing City Commercial Bank,“白存存不”想了半天,还是汇丰银行,HSBC,答话了,“还是不存”结果务功而返;一、永远都不要停止微笑,即使是在你难过的时候,说不定有人会因为你的笑容而爱上你; Never stop smiling, not even when you're sad, someone might fall in love with your smile.二、一个真正的朋友会握着你的手,触动你的心; A true friend is the one who holds your hand and touches your heart.三、你可能只是这个世界上的一个人,但对于某人来说,你就是全世界; You may only be a person in this world, but for someone, you're the world.。

十大最搞笑中式英语

十大最搞笑中式英语中文和英文之间有几个差异，导致中式英语成为大家熟悉的现象。

中式英语语法口语习惯、用词习惯及应用语言风格有所不同，而且其中的谐音和发音等因素也是另一个显而易见的不同。

随着全球化的不断深入，中式英语也渗透到越来越多的地方，成为世界笑料，甚至被一些美国和欧洲的媒体报道，由此受到大家的瞩目。

本文将挑选出十大最搞笑中式英语，让我们一起来看看，从中获得另一种乐趣。

1. Be Professer：在大多数地方，professer是“教授”的意思，但在中式英语中，Professer被用来表达“一个有经验的人，一个有学问的人”的意思。

例如：“My cousin is a professer in English，so you can ask him if you have any questions.”2. Move Up：Move up英语里指的是“向前移动”或“升职”，但在中式英语中，它通常是用来指“提高价格”。

例如：“The shopkeeper said he would move up the price if I wanted to buy two products.”3. Give Up：give up英语中有“放弃”的意思，但在中式英语中，它通常被用来表达“传递给某人”的意思。

例如：“I give up this book to my friend.”4. Look After：look after英语中有“照顾”的意思，但在中式英语中，它常常被用来指“留意”或“注意”的意思。

例如：“Look after your safety first before you do anything else.”5. Close Mouth：close mouth英语里指的是“闭嘴”，但在中式英语中，它多用来表达“不说”的意思。

例如：“He asked me to keep it a secret, so I closed my mouth.”6. Critical Moment：Critical moment英语里有“关键时刻”的意思，但在中式英语中，它常常用来表达“最糟糕的时刻”或“最坏的情况”的意思。

超级搞笑的中国式英语

超级搞笑的中国式英语1. 爱TMD谁谁谁：love he mother’s who who who2. 白痴：White eat!3. 板门弄斧：play an ax before Luban4. 班长：class long5. 彼此彼此：you me you me6. 表妹：watch sister7. 别唬我：don’t tiger me8. 不管三七二十一：no care three seven two ten one9. 不入虎穴，焉得虎子：Blue who say，and whose10. 不三不四：no three no four11. 不要开黄腔：do not open yellow gun12. 车祸现场描述：one car come，one car go ,two car peng－peng, people die13. 呈现强烈的企图心：Demonstrate the strong attempt heart14. 吃白食：eat white food15. 春江水暖鸭先知：spring river water warm duck first know16. 大人不计小人过：Big people do not think of small people’s mistake17. 第一眼看到你，我就爱上你了：first eye see you, i shit love you18. 电源线：power line19. 放马过来，给你点颜色看看：release your horse and come, I’ll give you some color to see see20. 蜂拥而至：go out like bee21. 给你点颜色看看：I’ll s how you some color22. 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸：I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face23. 恭喜发财：go high fuck try24. 狗娘养的：dog mother born25. 关公面前耍大刀：play a big knife before Guangong26. 好多人死了，你怎么不去死！：How many pople go to die, why do not you go to die27. 好好学习、天天向上：good good study, day day up28. 好久不见：long time no see29. 红颜知己：red face know me30. 加油：add oil31. 救人一命，胜造七级浮屠：save man one life, betther than building up 7-floor tower32. 开水：open water33. 看不看：see no see?34. 抗日游行：resist sun swim go35. 课间操：lesson between fuck36. 老表：old watch37. 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞：dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse’s son can make hole38. 马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger39. 没脸见人：have no face see person40. 美中不足：American Chinese not enough41. 面试：face try42. 明天谁起得早谁叫谁：tomorrow morning who get up early, who call who!43. 哪凉快哪呆着去where cool where you stay!44. 你爱我吗：you love I?45. 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你：you don’t bird me, so I don’t bird you46. 你给我等着：you give me wait47. 你给我滚出去：you gave me get out48. 你给我记住：you give me remember49. 你给我站住：you give me stop50. 你没看，我现在非常忙，一边玩去：You no see, I now very busy. One side play go51. 你妻子真漂亮/哪里哪里：your wife is beautiful/where where52. 你去不去？你不去我去！：You go no go? You no go I go!53. 你认为你是谁？：What do you think ,who are you ?54. 你TMD：you he mother’s55. 你问我，我去问谁：you ask me, me ask who56. 你丫要敢唬我，我他妈扇你！：IF you tiger me,I will mountain you!57. 你有两下子：you have two down son58. 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上：you have seed，I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！59. 你真有两下子：you really have tow down son60. 骑驴看唱本，走着瞧：riding a donkey reading play , go and see61. 七上八下：seven up eight down62. 亲爱的王小姐：dear wang little girl63. 请别碰行李：Please no touch the move the lee64. 青翠欲滴：It`s so green as will dropped65. 去你妈：go you mother66. 让世界充满爱：let's make love all over the world67. 人山人海：people mountain people sea68. 人之初，性本善：people first born, sex is kind69. 三人行，必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher70. 三心二意：three heart two meaning71. 色狼：colour wolf72. 生日快乐：birthday happy73. 上网：up net74. 上学：up school75. 胜败乃家常便饭：win lost milk house long poopoo rice76. 是不是：yes no yes77. 十全十美：ten all ten nice78. 十三点：ten three point79. 试试看：try try see80. 耍帅：play handsome81. 死猪不怕开水烫！：die pig not pa hot water tang!82. 谈朋友：talk friend83. 体壮如牛：body strong as a cow84. 万紫千红：ten thousand purple one thousand red85. 王八：king eight86. 王八蛋：wang eight eggs87. 望穿秋水：look through autumn water88. 王老五：wang old five89. 唯小人与女人难养也：only small people and women hard to feed90. 我的天呀！：my sky !91. 我服了你！：I follow you!92. 我感到很难过：I feel difficult to pass93. 我叫李老大，今年25：I call Li old big. toyear 2594. 我容易么我？：am I easy I？95. 我是大儿子：I am a big son96. 我是独一无二：I am olny one no two97. 我是流氓我怕谁：I’m a scamp, I’m afraid of whom98. 我是中国人：I am in China99. 我要给你点颜色看看：I will give you some color to see see （好像也被黑人群体最近所采用）100. 五讲、四美、三热爱：five talk, four beauty, three lover101. 无钱无得：No money, no talk102. 笑里藏刀：A knife in the smile103. 心花怒放：heart flower angry open104. 眼看手勿动：look, see OK, no touch105. 要钱不给，要命有一条：want money no, want life one106. 要钱还是要命：money or life?107. 一分耕耘一分收获：EVEN GAME WIN , EVEN SO WHOLE108. 一见钟情：One look clock love109. 意思意思：meaning meaning110. 一言既出，驷马难追：one word is out, four horses cannot chase111. 一元复苏，万象更新：one dollar restart, ten thousand elephant update112. 远水解不了近渴：Far water car not save near thirsty113. 咱们兄弟谁跟谁啊：we brothers, who and who ah114. 怎么老是你：how old are you?115. 怎么是你：how are you?116. 朝三暮四：morning three night four （感谢台湾卡通，好像这个用法在孩子们中开始流行）117. 这样也行？：this too good?118. 知之为知之，不知为不知：know is know，no know is no know119. 中国人民万岁：China people ten thousand year120. 猪狗不如：PIG DOG BLUE121. 猪肉面条：pig noodle122. 猪头三，去死吧：pig 3 head,go dead!123. 走过路过，不要错过：go past no mistake past124. 走着瞧：go and look!125. 钻石王老五：diamond wang old five。

超级搞笑的式英语

超级搞笑的式英语Document serial number【UU89WT-UU98YT-UU8CB-UUUT-UUT108】超级搞笑的中国式英语1. 爱TMD谁谁谁：love he mother’s who who who2. 白痴：White eat!3. 板门弄斧：play an ax before Luban4. 班长：class long5. 彼此彼此：you me you me6. 表妹：watch sister7. 别唬我：don’t tiger me8. 不管三七二十一：no care three seven two ten one9. 不入虎穴，焉得虎子：Blue who say，and whose10. 不三不四： no three no four11. 不要开黄腔：do not open yellow gun12. 车祸现场描述：one car come， one car go ,two car peng－peng, people die13. 呈现强烈的企图心：Demonstrate the strong attempt heart14. 吃白食：eat white food15. 春江水暖鸭先知：spring river water warm duck first know16. 大人不计小人过：Big people do not think of small people’s mistake17. 第一眼看到你，我就爱上你了：first eye see you, i shit love you18. 电源线：power line19. 放马过来，给你点颜色看看：release your horse and come, I’ll give you some color to see see20. 蜂拥而至：go out like bee21. 给你点颜色看看：I’ll s how you some color22. 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸：I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face23. 恭喜发财：go high fuck try24. 狗娘养的：dog mother born25. 关公面前耍大刀：play a big knife before Guangong26. 好多人死了，你怎么不去死！：How many pople go to die, why do not you go to die27. 好好学习、天天向上：good good study, day day up28. 好久不见：long time no see29. 红颜知己：red face know me30. 加油：add oil31. 救人一命，胜造七级浮屠： save man one life, betther than building up 7-floor tower32. 开水：open water33. 看不看：see no see34. 抗日游行：resist sun swim go35. 课间操：lesson between fuck36. 老表：old watch37. 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞：dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse’s son can make hole38. 马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger39. 没脸见人：have no face see person40. 美中不足：American Chinese not enough41. 面试：face try42. 明天谁起得早谁叫谁：tomorrow morning who get up early, who call who!43. 哪凉快哪呆着去where cool where you stay!44. 你爱我吗：you love I45. 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你：you don’t bird me, so I don’t bird you46. 你给我等着：you give me wait47. 你给我滚出去：you gave me get out48. 你给我记住：you give me remember49. 你给我站住：you give me stop50. 你没看，我现在非常忙，一边玩去：You no see, I now very busy. One side play go51. 你妻子真漂亮/哪里哪里：your wife is beautiful/where where52. 你去不去你不去我去！：You go no go You no go I go!53. 你认为你是谁：What do you think ,who are you54. 你TMD：you he mother’s55. 你问我，我去问谁：you ask me, me ask who56. 你丫要敢唬我，我他妈扇你！：IF you tiger me,I will mountain you!57. 你有两下子：you have two down son58. 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上：you have seed， I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！59. 你真有两下子：you really have tow down son60. 骑驴看唱本，走着瞧：riding a donkey reading play , go and see61. 七上八下：seven up eight down62. 亲爱的王小姐：dear wang little girl63. 请别碰行李：Please no touch the move the lee64. 青翠欲滴：It`s so green as will dropped65. 去你妈：go you mother66. 让世界充满爱：let's make love all over the world67. 人山人海：people mountain people sea68. 人之初，性本善：people first born, sex is kind69. 三人行，必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher70. 三心二意：three heart two meaning71. 色狼：colour wolf72. 生日快乐：birthday happy73. 上网：up net74. 上学：up school75. 胜败乃家常便饭：win lost milk house long poopoo rice76. 是不是：yes no yes77. 十全十美：ten all ten nice78. 十三点：ten three point79. 试试看：try try see80. 耍帅：play handsome81. 死猪不怕开水烫！：die pig not pa hot water tang!82. 谈朋友：talk friend83. 体壮如牛：body strong as a cow84. 万紫千红：ten thousand purple one thousand red85. 王八：king eight86. 王八蛋：wang eight eggs87. 望穿秋水：look through autumn water88. 王老五：wang old five89. 唯小人与女人难养也：only small people and women hard to feed90. 我的天呀！：my sky !91. 我服了你！：Ifollowyou!92. 我感到很难过：I feel difficult to pass93. 我叫李老大，今年25：I call Li old big. toyear 2594. 我容易么我：am I easy I95. 我是大儿子：I am a big son96. 我是独一无二：I am olny one no two97. 我是流氓我怕谁：I’m a scamp, I’m afraid of whom98. 我是中国人：I am in China99. 我要给你点颜色看看：I will give you some color to see see （好像也被黑人群体最近所采用）100. 五讲、四美、三热爱：five talk, four beauty, three lover101. 无钱无得：No money, no talk102. 笑里藏刀：A knife in the smile103. 心花怒放：heart flower angry open104. 眼看手勿动：look, see OK, no touch105. 要钱不给，要命有一条：want money no, want life one 106. 要钱还是要命：money or life107. 一分耕耘一分收获：EVEN GAME WIN , EVEN SO WHOLE108. 一见钟情：Onelookclocklove109. 意思意思：meaning meaning110. 一言既出，驷马难追：one word is out, four horses cannot chase111. 一元复苏，万象更新：one dollar restart, ten thousand elephant update112. 远水解不了近渴：Farwatercarnotsavenearthirsty113. 咱们兄弟谁跟谁啊：we brothers, who and who ah114. 怎么老是你：how old are you115. 怎么是你：how are you116. 朝三暮四：morning three night four （感谢台湾卡通，好像这个用法在孩子们中开始流行）117. 这样也行：this too good118. 知之为知之，不知为不知：know is know， no know is no know119. 中国人民万岁：China people ten thousand year120. 猪狗不如：PIG DOG BLUE121. 猪肉面条：pig noodle122. 猪头三，去死吧：pig 3 head,go dead!123. 走过路过，不要错过：go past no mistake past 124. 走着瞧：go and look!125. 钻石王老五：diamond wang old five。