高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本202 The One With the Breast Milk素材

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高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本220 The One Where Old Yeller Dies素材

ROSS: Really? I mean, I, I had a whole speach prepared.SUSAN: Oh shout, that would have been fun.ROSS:Oh look, did, did you just see that? Did you see? He just waved, he just waved, he's never waved before, you've never waved before. Yes he has. Very good.[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are there. Phoebe enters carrying video tapes.]PHOEBE: Hey.RACHEL: Hey Phoebs, whatcha got there?PHOEBE: Ok, Love Story, Brian's Song, and Terms of Endearment. MONICA:Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.PHOEBE: Yeah, I talked to my grandma about the Old Yeller incident, and she told me that my mom used to not show us the ends of sad movies to shield us from the pain and sadness. You know, before she killed herself.[Chandler and Joey enter]CHANDLER: Hey.JOEY: Hey.RACHEL: Hey.MONICA: Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him? JOEY:Yeah right after we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie. What's the matter with you, he's parking the car.MONICA: So'd you guys have fun?CHANDLER: Your boyfriend is so cool.MONICA: Really?CHANDLER: Yeah, he let us drive his Jaguar. Joey for 12 blocks, me for 15.RACHEL: Wow, he must like you the best.JO EY:Oh, what about that thing he did when he tipped the guy who showed us to our seats. You never even saw the money, it was like this. [With money in his palm] Hey Chandler, thanks for showing us to our seats [shakes his had and passes the dollar].CHANDLER:You're welcome. Hey Joey, thanks for parking the car [passes the dollar back].JOEY: No problem. Hey ChandlerCHANDLER: I think they get it.JOEY: Ok.[Richard enters]CHANDLER: There's the man.JOEY: He-he-eyy. [Shakes his had and passes the dollar] RICHARD: Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way. JOEY: Ok. He kept my dollar.[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Carol and Susan are dropping off Ben.]MONICA:So your first whole weekend without Ben, what're you guys gonna do?CAROL: Uh, we're going down to Colonial Williamsburg. 他自己站了起来——站立很遗憾你们错过了，不过我录了下来你们肯定想看呃，我们知道，上个礼拜他就能这样了如果愿意你可以看我们的录像带我不相信我错过了，我错过了所有的第一次我错过了，他第一次打滚，第一次爬我还错过了什么？他现在能说话么，他会开车么他现在有最喜欢喝的酒吗？事实上，他快能说话了他还不能说“妈妈”，但他有一次说“也门”欧，我讨厌总是错过这些事你们知道，我想和他待…几天和他度过整个周末听着，我的意思是，我想……太棒了，这样很好真的？我的意思是…，我本来准备了长篇大论来说服你们的欧，不是吧，早知道那样就有意思了欧，看那，你们看见了吗？看见了吗？他刚才挥手了他挥手了，他以前从没挥过手（对着孩子说）你从来没挥过手是的，他挥过很好嘿 Phoebs,你在干什么？Ok, ‘爱情故事’, ‘布里安之歌’，和‘母女情深’.哇，要是再有‘战火屠城’这个片子加上一些吃的，你就能开个派对了是的，我和我姥姥谈了老黄狗里的剧情而她告诉我我妈妈以前从不给我们看悲剧电影的结尾，以此来使我们远离痛苦和悲伤在她自杀之前嘿。

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本202 The One With the Breast Milk素材

MONICA:You had a salad.
PHOEBE:Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.
RACHEL:(entering) Hey, guys, what's up.
PHOEBE:I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had a salad.
MONICA:Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day.
PHOEBE:What?
MONICA:We were shopping, and we had lunch.
PHOEBE:Oh, all right. What did I have?
RACHEL:Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?
PHOEBE:Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.
RACHEL:You went shopp ing for fur?
PHOEBE:Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh, so then we bought some, (sees Monica pointing at her chest) uh, boobs.
[Scene:A Department Store, Joey is selling men's cologne.]
JOEY:Bijan for men? Bijan for men? Bijan for men? Hey Annabelle.
ANNABELLE:Hey, Joey. So did you hear about the new guy?

a003老友记第二季英文字幕

203 The One Where Mr. Heckles DiesCHANDLER: Hey.MONICA: So how was Joan?CHANDLER: I broke up with her.CHANDLER: They were huge. When she sneezed, bats flew out of them.RACHEL: Come on, they were not that huge.CHANDLER: I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.MONICA:How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.CHANDLER: You or me?ROSS: I got it. Uh, Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.JOEY: You guys are messin' with me, right?ALL: Yeah.JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa."PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.CHANDLER: Maureen Rosilla.ROSS: Not hating Yanni is not a real reason.(knock)MONICA: Hello, Mr. Heckles.MR. HECKLES: You're doing it again.MONICA: We're not doing anything.MR. HECKLES: You're stomping. It's disturbing my birds.RACHEL: You don't have birds.MR. HECKLES: I could have birds.MONICA: Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down.MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.RACHEL: All right, bye-bye.CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky. ROSS: We'll give you Janice.PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."RACHEL: "Oh, my, god."JOEY: "Oh, Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"MONICA: Stop with the broom, we're not making noise.RACHEL: We won. We won!MONICA: Mr. Heckles.RACHEL: How did this happen?MR. TREEGER: He musta been sweepin'. They found a broom in his hand.MONICA: That's terrible.MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.MR. TREEGER: You never know.PHOEBE: Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. Go into the light, Mr. Heckles! CHANDLER: Ok, Phoebe.PHOEBE:I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.JOEY: Such as?PHOEBE: Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, or evolution?ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?PHOEBE: Nah. Not really.ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.ROSS:Too easy? Too...The process of every living thing on this planet evolving over millions of years from single-celled organisms, too easy?PHOEBE: Yeah, I just don't buy it.ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.PHOEBE: Ok, don't get me started on gravity.ROSS: You uh, you don't believe in gravity?PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed. (knock)CHANDLER: Uh-Oh. It's Isaac Newton, and he's pissed.MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.MONICA: What can we do for you?MR. BOYLE: All right, kids. Here's the deal. According to my client's will, he wants to leave all his earthly possessions to "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine".MONICA: Well, what about his family?MR. BOYLE: He didn't have any.RACHEL: Ok, so let's talk money.MR. BOYLE: All right, there was none. Let's talk signing. You be noisy girl number one, you be noisy girl number two.MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!RACHEL: Have you ever seen so much crap?CHANDLER: Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crapJOEY: Check this out. Can I have this?ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?PHOEBE: Just don't. Look at this funky shirt!ROSS: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Ok, I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species, ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?ROSS: You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.PHOEBE: See, I didn't know that.ROSS: Well, there you go.PHOEBE: Huh. So now, the real question is, who put those fossils there, and why?CHANDLER: Hey, look at this. "My Big Book of Grievances."JOEY:Hey, there's me! April 17th. Excessive noise. Italian guy comes homes with a date. Hey Chandler, look, you're in here too.CHANDLER:April 18th, excessive noise. Italian guy's gay roommate comes home with the dry-cleaning. Well that's excellent.RACHEL: Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. Is this tacky or what? We have to have this. MONICA: Rache, I think we have enough regular lamps.RACHEL: What? Come on, it's not like I'm asking for this girly clock or anything, which, by the way, I also think is very cool.MONICA: It doesn't go with any of my stuff.RACHEL: Well, what about my stuff?MONICA: You don't have any stuff.RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?MONICA: No.RACHEL: Yes you do. You think of it as your apartment, and I'm just somebody who rents a room. MONICA: Mmmmm.RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp. ROSS:Ok, Pheebs. See how I'm making these little toys move? Opposable thumbs. Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?PHOEBE: Maybe the overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts.ROSS: Please tell me you're joking.PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.ROSS: No, no, Pheebs, we can't, ok, because--PHOEBE: What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No, what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.ROSS: Is there blood coming out of my ears?JOEY: Check it out, check it out. Heckles' high school yearbook.CHANDLER: Wow, he looks so normal.PHOEBE: He's even kind of cute.JOEY: "Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid in school. CHANDLER: Funniest? Heckles?JOEY: That's what it says.CHANDLER: Wow, Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I. He was right. Would you listen to that?PHOEBE: I'd call that excessive.CHANDLER: Whoa!JOEY: What?CHANDLER:Heckles played clarinet in band, and I played clarinet. And he was in the scale modeler's club, and I was, well, there was no club, but I sure thought they were cool.JOEY: So, you were both dorks. Big deal.CHANDLER:I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me and Heckles...Would you knock it off?JOEY: Have you been here all night?CHANDLER:Look at this. Pictures of all the women that Heckles went out with. Look what he wrote on them. Vivian, too tall. Madge, big gums. Too loud, too smart, makes noise when she eats. This is, this is me. This is what I do. I'm gonna end up alone, just like he did.JOEY: Chandler, Heckles was a nut case.CHANDLER: Our trains are on the same track, ok? Yeah, sure, I'm coming up 30 years behind him, but the stops are all the same. Bitter Town. Aloneville. Hermit Junction.JOEY: All right, you know what we gotta do? We gotta get you outta here. Come on, I'll buy you breakfast, let's go.CHANDLER:What if I never find someone? Or worse, what if I've found her, but I dumped her because she pronounced it "supposably"?JOEY: Chandler, come on, you're gonna find somebody.CHANDLER: How do you know that? How?JOEY: I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.CHANDLER: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna end up alone. Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays? JOEY: Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna be doin'. I mean, what if we're at her folks' place?CHANDLER: Yeah, I understand.JOEY: You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. Every year, all right?CHANDLER: You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this. I'll see you man.JOEY: Supposably. Supposably. Did they go to the zoo? Supposably.CHANDLER: (on phone) Hi, it's me.JANICE: Oh, my, god.PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?CHANDLER: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?ROSS: You remember Janice, right?CHANDLER: Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, and she honestly cared about me. Janice is my last chance to have somebody.JANICE: Helloo!!CHANDLER: Oh, my, god!JOEY: Geez, look how fat she got.JANICE: Hey, it's everybody.CHANDLER: Janice, you're--JANICE: Yes, I am.CHANDLER: Is it--?JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now. CHANDLER: Congratulations.JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.MONICA: Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?RACHEL: What?MONICA: Hide the Lamp.RACHEL: Monica, let it go.MONICA: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?RACHEL: Well, then, you'll just have to eat the other lamps.PHOEBE: Uh-oh. It's Scary Scientist Man.ROSS: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.ROSS: It's the only possibility, Phoebe.PHOEBE: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?ROSS: There might be, a teeny, tiny, possibility.PHOEBE: I can't believe you caved.ROSS: What?PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?RACHEL: I am. Let me just get my coat.MONICA: Ok, all right. It was an accident, I swear, all right. I was putting on my jacket, and the thing, and the lamp, and it broke.RACHEL:Oh, please, Monica. You've always hated my lamp, and then, all of a sudden, it's just magically broken?MONICA: Phoebe, tell her!PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you. RACHEL: Hey Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp.CHANDLER: Neat. I'm gonna die alone.RACHEL: Ok, you win.MONICA: Chandler, you're not gonna die alone.CHANDLER: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.PHOEBE: Uh huh. Why is that?CHANDLER: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y=know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout!MONICA: You have got to get over this. You're not gonna end up alone.CHANDLER: Of course I am. I reject anyone who's crazy enough to actually go out with me, and then I bitch about the fact that there aren't any great women out there.RACHEL: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with. MONICA: You are not a freak. You're a guy.RACHEL: She's right. She's right. You are no different than the rest of them.MONICA: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.CHANDLER: In a bad way?MONICA:No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't even have a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimate with someone. RACHEL: Yeah. You're not gonna end up alone.PHOEBE: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone! MONICA: You made it!PHOEBE: You're there!RACHEL: You are ready to make a commitment!CHANDLER: Whoa! Don't know about that.RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.RACHEL: Thank you.MONICA: That's fine.CHANDLER: Hey. Well, you will all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night. This woman, Alison, from work. She's great. She's pretty, she's smart. And uh, I've been holding off on asking her out in the past, because she has an unusually large head. But, I'm not gonna let that stuff hang me up anymore. Look at me. I'm growing.JOEY: Hey, uh, you can't recycle yearbooks, can you?CHANDLER: I'll take that.JOEY: You want his yearbook?CHANDLER: Yeah, yeah. Some people said some nice things about him. I think somebody should have it.MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.RACHEL: It's really not that big!CHANDLER: Takin' that with you, huh?JOEY: Oh, yeah.ROSS: You comin'?CHANDLER: Yeah, jus' second. Good-bye Mr. Heckles. We'll try to keep it down.ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?CHANDLER: Sure. (My god, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting. My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!)END。

老友记第二季字幕

201 The One With Ross' New Girlfriend [Scene:Central Perk, Phoebe is recapping last season, and as she talks we see a montague of scenes from Ross and Rachel.]PHOEBE:Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meet him when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the plane with another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enough about us. So, how've you been? OPENING CREDITS[Scene, The Airport, continued from last season, Rachel is waiting for Ross to come of the plane, when she sees he's coming off with another woman.]RACHEL: Oh my god. Oh my god. (She decides to make a break for it.) Excuse me. Move! Move! Emergency! Excuse me! (She tries climbing over a bench and falls down.)ROSS: Rache!RACHEL: Oh, there you are! Hi! Oh, so, so, how was China, you? (Hits him with the flowers.) ROSS: It was, it was great. Oh, what happened? RACHEL: What?ROSS: You're bleeding.RACHEL: I am? Oh, look at that, yes I am. Enough about me, enough about me, Mr. Back from the Orient. I wanna hear everything! (Looks at Julie) ROSS: Well, where do I start? This is Julie. Julie, this is Rachel.RACHEL: These are, these aren't for you. (to Julie) These are for you. (Loudly, thinking she can't speak English.) Welcome to our country. JULIE: (Loudly, proving she can speak English.) Thank you. I'm from New York.RACHEL: Ok, well, not a problem. We'll just use them to stop the bleeding. Ok. Baggage claim? Ok. [Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is waiting for Rachel to return from the airport with Ross.] CHANDLER:No way!MONICA: I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it with Ross! PHOEBE: Oh my god. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, all right, what's bigger than huge?JOEY: Um, this?PHOEBE: Yes.MONICA: Guys, you got your hair cut. CHANDLER:Yes, yes, we did, thanks to Vidal Buffay.PHOEBE: 'Cause, you know, (in that voice) if you don't look good, we don't look good. I love that voice.RACHEL: (entering, out of breath) Airport, airport. Ross, not alone, Julie, arm around her. Cramp, cramp.CHANDLER:Ok, I think she's trying to tell us something. Quick, get the verbs.RACHEL: (to Chandler) You, you, you said he liked me. (Ross and Julie enter) You, you slowpokes! ROSS: That's all right, Rache, we got the bags. Hi, hello. Julie, this is my sister Monica. This is Chandler. Phoebe. Joey, what up?JOEY: What up?!ROSS: Everyone, this is Julie.RACHEL: (out of breath) Julie.ALL: Ohh. (Happily) Hi!JULIE: Hi, but I'm not here, you haven't met me. I'll make a much better first impression tomorrow when I don't have 20 hours of cab and plane on me.ROSS: And bus.JULIE: Oh my god.ROSS:The screaming guy?JULIE:And the spitting?ROSS: You gotta hear this story.JULIE: We're on this bus, that's easily 200 years old...ROSS: At least.JULIE: ...and this guy--RACHEL: And the chicken poops in her lap. Oh, I'm so sorry. I just gave away the ending, didn't I? Oh! It's just, I just heard this story in the cab, and it is all I can think about.MONICA: This is amazing. I mean, how, how did this happen?JULIE:Well, Ross and I were in grad school together.ROSS: But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guess who's in charge of the dig.RACHEL: Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick- you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?MONICA: It's an expression.ROSS: Well, we just wanted to say a quick hi, and then we're gonna go see the baby.JULIE: And then we've gotta get some sleep. ROSS: Yeah, it's really 6:00 tomorrow night our time.CHANDLER:Well, listen, don't tell us what's gonna happen though, 'cause I like to be surprised. (Ross and Julie exit) RACHEL: Bye. (She closes the door and everyone tries tosympathize with her.)[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler enter.]ROSS: Hey, Rache, can I get some coffee?RACHEL: Yeah, sure.ROSS: Thank you.CHANDLER: Hey, Rache, can I get--RACHEL: Did you talk to him?CHANDLER: Not yet.RACHEL: Then, no.(He goes to sit down next to Ross.)CHANDLER: So what the hell happened to you in China? Imean, when last we left you, you were totally in love with,you know.ROSS: I know, I know I was, but there was always this littlevoice inside that kept saying it's never gonna happen, moveon. You know whose voice that was?CHANDLER: God?ROSS: It was you, pal.CHANDLER: Well, maybe it was God, doing me.ROSS: Look, you were right. She looks at me and sees afriend, that's all. But then I met Julie, and I don't know,we're havin' a great time. And I have to say, I neverwould've gone for it with her if it hadn't been for you.CHANDLER: Well, you owe me one, big guy.RACHEL: Here's your lemonade.ROSS: I didn't order lemonade.RACHEL:Oh. Well then, you better go take that backbecause they're gonna charge you for that.ROSS: But--RACHEL: Go go go go, come on! (to Chandler) So then,well, what did you find out?CHANDLER: He said, he said that they're having a greattime. I'm sorry. But, the silver lining, if you wanna see it, isthat he made the decision all by himself without any outsidehelp whatsoever.RACHEL: How is that the silver lining?CHANDLER: You have to really wanna see it.[Scene:Monica and Rachel's, Ross and the gang iswatching TV.]ROSS: Ironically, these are the guys who were picked lastin gym.[cut to Phoebe and Monica in the kitchen.]MONICA: Phoebes, you know what I'm thinking?PHOEBE: Oh, ok. How, it's been so long since you've hadsex, you're wondering if they've changed it?MONICA: No, although now that's what I'm thinking.PHOEBE: All right, so what were you thinking?MONICA:Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guyssuch great haircuts, I thought, maybe you'd like to do mine?PHOEBE: Ohh! No.MONICA: Why not?PHOEBE:Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and anunbelievable control freak.MONICA: No you're not.PHOEBE: I know I'm not, but you are, and I was trying tospare your feelings.(The phone rings.)JOEY: (answering the phone) Hello? Oh, hi. Yeah, hold ona second. Ross, it's Julie, for you. (Throws him the phone.)ROSS: (on phone) Hello? Hi.CHANDLER: (entering) Hi. Anybody know a good tailor?JOEY: Needs some clothes altered?CHANDLER: No, no, I'm just looking for a man to draw onme with chalk.JOEY:Why don't you go see Frankie? My family's beengoin' to him forever. He did my first suit when I was 15. Nowait, 16. No, 'scuse me, 15. (still confused) All right, whenwas 1990?CHANDLER:You have to stop the Q-tip when there'sresistance!ROSS: (on phone) Ok, ok, sweetheart, I'll see you later. Ok,bye. What? Oh, that is so sweet. No, no, ok, you hang up.Ok, ok, one, two, three. (motions for Rachel to be quiet)Well you didn't hang up either.RACHEL: She didn't hang up either!ROSS: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y--RACHEL:(taking the phone and hanging it up) Sorry, Ithought you were talking to me.ROSS: Rachel! I'll just call her back.RACHEL: Okay!ROSS: (calls Julie back) Hi? Sorry, we got disconnected...RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? How didthis happen to me? A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine.Ross was just Ross, just this guy. Now he's Rrrooossss, oh,this really great guy that I can't have.MONICA: Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.RACHEL: I know you did. I'm just gonna deal with it, I'mjust gonna deal with it. (Ross comes by, smoching with Julieon the phone.) I gotta get out of here.CHANDLER:Ok, I don't care what you guys say,something's bothering her.[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning.]JOEY: You know, I think I was sixteen.MONICA: Please, just a little bit off the back.PHOEBE: I'm still on "no".RACHEL:(poking her head in from her bedroom) Uh,morning. Do you guys think you could close your eyes forjust a sec?JOEY: No no no no no, (grabs his pants) I'm not fallin' forthat again.PHOEBE: What's goin' on?RACHEL: Well, I sorta did a stupid thing last night.CHANDLER: What stupid thing did you do?PAOLO: Bon giorno tutti!PHOEBE: Ewww!COMMERCIAL BREAK[Scene: Monica and Rachel's continued from earlier.]RACHEL: Ok, Paulo, why don't you just go get dressed,and then you be on your way, ok, bye-bye.MONICA: Rachel, how did this happen?RACHEL: I don't know, I just kinda ran into him lastnight.PHOEBE: Where?RACHEL: At his apartment. Is this juice?JOEY: Whoa, whoa. And the fact that you dumped himbecause he hit on Phoebe?RACHEL: Oh God, I know I'm a pathetic loser.MONICA: Honey, you're not pathetic, you're sad.CHANDLER:People do stupid things when they'reupset.MONICA: My god, if I had a nickel for every guy I wishI hadn't--but this is about your horrible mistake.ROSS: Hi. Sorry we're late but we were--well, therewas touching.PAOLO: Hey, hey Ross.ROSS: Hey, Paulo. What are you doing here?PAOLO: I do Raquel.ROSS: (to Rachel) So, uh, he's back.RACHEL: Yeah, he's back. Is that a problem?ROSS: No, not a problem.RACHEL: Good! I'm glad it's not a problem.PHOEBE: Ok, you're gonna have to not touch my ass.CHANDLER: Well, in spite of the yummy bagels andpalpable tension, I've got pants that need to be altered.JOEY: Hey, Chandler, when you see Frankie, tell himJoey Tribbiani says hello. He'll know what it means.CHANDLER: Are you sure he's gonna be able to crackthat code?MONICA: You know it's funny, the last time Paulo washere, my hair was so much shorter and cuter.PHOEBE: All right. Ok, but, but you have to promisethat you will not be all like control-y and bossy andMonica about it.MONICA: I promise.PHOEBE: All right. Now some of you are gonna get cut,and some of you aren't. But I promise none of you aregonna feel a thing.[Scene:Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is finishing withher haircut.]PHOEBE: All right, that's it, I quit.MONICA: What? I didn't say anything.PHOEBE: Yeah, but this isn't the face of a person whotrusts a person. Ok, this is the face of a person who,you know, doesn't trust a person.MONICA: I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Phoebe. It's just a littleshorter than what we had discussed.PHOEBE: Would you relax? I know what I am doing.This is how he wears it.MONICA: How who wears it?PHOEBE: Demi Moore.MONICA: Demi Moore is not a he.PHOEBE: Well, he was a he in Arthur, and in Ten.MONICA: That's Dudley Moore. I said I wanted it likeDemi Moore.PHOEBE: Oh, oh, oh my god!MONICA: Oh my god!PHOEBE:I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's DemiMoore?MONICA:She's the act ress who was in Disclosure,Indecent Proposal, Ghost.PHOEBE: Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.MONICA: I KNOW![Scene:Frank's tailor shop, Chandler is getting hispants altered.]FRANKIE: How long do you want the cuffs?CHANDLER: At least as long as I have the pants.FRANKIE: I just got that. Ok, now we'll do your inseam.(He slowly measures it up his leg, and Chandler makesa rather surprised face.)[Scene:Monica and Rachel's, Monica is recoveringfrom her haircut, Phoebe is playing her doctor and iscoming in from the bedroom.]RACHEL: How is she?PHOEBE: It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is agood sign.ROSS: How's the hair?PHOEBE: I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross, it doesn't lookgood. I put a clip on one side, which seems to havestopped the curling.JOEY: Can we see her?PHOEBE:Your hair looks too good, I think it wouldupset her. Ross, you come on in. (They go into thebedroom leaving Joey and Rachel alone.)JOEY: How're you doing?RACHEL: I'm ok.JOEY:Ooh, that bad, huh? Look, I can sense whenwomen are depressed and vulnerable. It's one of mygifts.RACHEL: When I saw him get off that plane with her,I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's likethere's rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me.JOEY: You gotta tell Ross how you feel.RACHEL:Come on. How can I just tell him? Whatabout Julie?JOEY: What about her? They've only been going outfor two weeks. Ross has been in love with you for like10 years.RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know.JOEY: Look, Rache, Rache, I've been with my share ofwomen. In fact, I've been with like a lot of people'sshare of women. The point is, I've never felt aboutanyone the way Ross felt about you.CHANDLER: (entering, angry) Yo, paisan! Can I talkto you for a sec? Your tailor is a very bad man!JOEY: Frankie? What're you talking about?ROSS: (entering from teh bedroom) Hey, what's goin'on?CHANDLER: Joey's tailor...took advantage of me.ROSS: What?JOEY: No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years.CHANDLER: He said he was going to do my inseam,and he ran his hand up my leg, and then, there was definite--ROSS: what?CHANDLER: Cupping.JOEY: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, they go up the other side, they move it back, and then they do the rear. What? Ross, Ross, would you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?ROSS: Yes, yes it is. In prison! Whatsa matter with you?JOEY: What? That's not? Oh my god. [Scene:Monica and Rachel's, later that day. Monica is now out and about.] MONICA: Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better.ROSS: I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. MONICA: Thank you. My hair is very amused. CHANDLER:Come on, Monica, things could be worse. You could get caught between the moon and New York City. I know it's crazy, but it's true. PHOEBE: Thank you.ROSS: Well, I gotta go. Bye. Bye, Rache. RACHEL: (sticking her head in from the balcony) Wait, are you leaving?ROSS: Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!" RACHEL: Well, can I talk to you for a sec? ROSS: Okay. (goes out onto the balcony) JOEY:Hey, when the doctor does that hernia test...CHANDLER: That's ok.[Out on the balcony]ROSS: What's goin' on?RACHEL: Well, first of all, Paulo and I are not back together. It was just a stupid thing I did, and if I could go back in time and do it again, well, I wouldn't. Um, second of all, what? (Ross laughs) ROSS: Ok. Well, before I say anything, I just need to know, is this one of those things where you break up with a guy, and then I tell you what I think, and then the next day you get back together with the guy, and I look like a complete idiot? RACHEL: No. No-no-no-no.ROSS: Well, then, I think, I think the guy is scum.I hate him. I physically hate him. I always have. You are way too good to be with a guy like that. You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you, and who gets how funny and sweet and amazing, and adorable, and sexy you are, you know? Someone who wakes up every morning thinking "Oh my god, I'm with Rachel". You know, someone who makes you feel good, the way I am with Julie. Was there a second of all? RACHEL: No, I think that was the whole all. [Cut back inside, Joey is on the phone.]JOEY: I swear to god, Dad. That's not how they measure pants.CLOSING CREDITS[Scene: Central Perk, Julie is wanting to get her hair cut from Phoebe.]JULIE: I was thinking of doing it a little shorter, you know, like Andy McDowell's new haircut? PHOEBE: You wanna do it right now?JULIE: Great! (Julie leaves)PHOEBE: (to Rachel) Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andy McDowell's the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?RACHEL:No. No no no no no. That's Rodney McDowell. Andy McDowell is the guy from Planet of the Apes.PHOEBE: Oh, yeah. Ok, thank you. RACHEL: You're welcome.202 The One With the Breast Milk [Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]MONICA: (entering from her bedroom carrying a present) Ok, these were unbelievably expensive, and I know he's gonna grow out of them in like, 20 minutes, but I couldn't resist. (There a little pair of Nike shoes.)PHOEBE: Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it. (Ben starts to cry) Oh my god, oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?SUSAN: Oh, is he hungry already?CAROL:I guess so. (Carol starts to breast feed Ben.)CHANDLER:You know, it's... (sees the feeding taking place next to him) something funny about sneakers. I'll be right back. (Goes into the kitchen) JOEY: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.ROSS: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?CHANDLER: We're just hanging out by the spoons. Ladle?ROSS: Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world. JOEY: Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.ROSS: This is my son having lunch, ok? It's gonna happen a lot, so you'd better get used to it. Now if you have any problem with it, if you're uncomfortable, just ask questions. Carol's fine with it, now come on.(They go back into the living room) CHANDLER: Carol, Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding?CAROL: Sure.JOEY: Uh, does it hurt? CAROL: It did at first, but not anymore.JOEY: Chandler?CHANDLER: So, uh, how often can you do it?CAROL: As much as he needs.JOEY: Ok, I got one, I got one. If he blows into one, doesthe other one get bigger?OPENING TITLES[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is all there.]JULIE: Rachel, do you have any muffins left?RACHEL: Yeah, I forget which ones.JULIE: Oh, you're busy, that's ok, I'll get it. Anybody elsewant one?ALL: No thanks.JULIE:Oh, you're losin' your apron here, let me get it.There you go. (Ties it back up for her)RACHEL:(to Julie) Thank you. (under her breath toChandler) What a bitch.JULIE:Oh, listen you guys. I have this friend atBloomingdales who's quitting tomorrow and he wants toabuse his discount. So, anyone want to come with me andtake advantage of it?PHOEBE: I can't, I have to take my grandmother to thevet.MONICA: Ok, um, I'll go with you.JULIE: Great.ROSS: (enters) Hi, honey.CHANDLER: Hey, sweetums.ROSS: Hello to the rest.ALL:Hi!JOEY:Monica what're you doin'? You can't go shoppingwith her? What about Rachel?MONICA: It's gonna be a problem, isn't it?CHANDLER: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdales withJulie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house ofworship.MONICA: But I'm--PHOEBE: Monica, she will kill you. She will kill you like adog in the street.ROSS: So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shoppingtomorrow?MONICA: Yeah, uh, it's actually not that big a deal.ROSS: It's a big deal to me. This is great, Monica. I reallyappreciate this.MONICA: You're welcome.PHOEBE: Woof, woof.[Scene: A Department Store, Joey is selling men'scologne.]JOEY: Bijan for men? Bijan for men? Bijan for men? HeyAnnabelle.ANNABELLE: Hey, Joey. So did you hear about the newguy?JOEY: Who?ANNABELLE: Nobody knows his name. Me and the girlsjust call him the Hombre man.JOEY: What's he doin' in my section?ANNABELLE: I guess he doesn't know.JOEY: Well, he's gonna. I'll see you a little later, ok? Hey,how ya doin'?TODD: Mornin'.JOEY: Listen, I know you're new, but it's kinda understoodthat everything from Young Men's to the escalator is myterritory.TODD: Your territory, huh?JOEY: Yeah. Bijan for men?GUY: No thanks.TODD: Hombre?GUY: Yeah. All right.TODD: You were saying?[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Monica enters.]MONICA: Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we wereshopping all day.PHOEBE: What?MONICA: We were shopping, and we had lunch.PHOEBE: Oh, all right. What did I have?MONICA: You had a salad.PHOEBE: Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.RACHEL: (entering) Hey, guys, what's up.PHOEBE: I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had asalad.RACHEL: Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?PHOEBE: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.RACHEL: You went shopping for fur?PHOEBE: Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh,so then we bought some, (sees Monica pointing at her chest)uh, boobs.RACHEL: You bought boobs?PHOEBE: (Monica is yanking on her bra strap) Bras! Webought bras! We bought bras.[Scene: The Department Store, Joey is trying to sell somecologne.]JOEY:Bijan for men? Hey, Annabelle, Uh, listen, I waswondering if maybe after work you and I could go maybegrab a cup of coffee.ANNABELLE: Oh, actually I sorta have plans.TODD: Ready, Annabelle?ANNABELLE: You bet. Maybe some other time?JOEY: Hey, it's not the first time I lost a girl to a cowboyspraying cologne. Bijan for men?[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol is dropping Ben off forRoss to watch.]CAROL: Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is onlyfor after his naps, not before his naps or he won't sleep.ROSS: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We havea good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father andson.SUSAN: Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. Don't look sosurprised. I'm a lovely person.RACHEL: Oh, this is so cute.SUSAN: Oh, I got that for him.ROSS: My mommies love me. That's clever.MONICA: Hello? Oh, Hi, Ju-- Hi, Jew! Uh huh? Uh huh? Ok.Um, sure, that'd be great. See ya then. Bye.RACHEL: Did you just say Hi, Jew?MONICA:Yes. Uh, yes, I did. That was my friend,Eddie Moskowitz. Yeah, he likes it. Reaffirms his faith.PHOEBE: Ben, dinner!ROSS:Thanks Aunt Pheebs. Hey, you didn'tmicrowave that, did you, because it's breast milk, andyou're not supposed to do that.PHOEBE: Duh, I think I know how to heat breast milk.Ok.CHANDLER: What did you just do?PHOEBE: I licked my arm, what?ROSS: It's breast milk.PHOEBE: So?RACHEL:Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from aperson.JOEY: What is the big deal?CHANDLER: What did you just do?ROSS: Ok, would people stop drinking the breast milk?PHOEBE: You won't even taste it?ROSS: No!PHOEBE: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?ROSS:Not even if Carol's breast had a picture of amissing child on it.MONICA: Hey, where is everybody?RACHEL:They took Ben to the park. Where've youbeen?MONICA:Just out. Had some lunch, just me, littlequality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.RACHEL: Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by theway. Here are your keys, hon. Mon, if uh you were atlunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars?MONICA:You know what probably happened?Someone musta stolen my credit card.RACHEL: And sorta just put the receipt back in yourpocketMONICA: That is an excellent excellent question. Thatis excellent.RACHEL: Monica, what is with you? Who'd you havelunch with?MONICA: Judy.RACHEL: Who?MONICA: Julie.RACHEL: What?MONICA: Jody.RACHEL: You were with Julie?MONICA: Look, when it started I was just trying to benice to her because she was my brother's girlfriend.And then, one thing led to another and, before I knewit, we were...shopping.RACHEL: Oh. Oh my god.MONICA: Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn'tmean anything to me.RACHEL: Yeah, right.MONICA:Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you thewhole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant foryou to find out.RACHEL: Oh, please, you wanted to get caught.MONICA: That is not true!RACHEL: Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave itin here?MONICA: Did it ever occur to you that I might just bethat stupid?RACHEL: Ok, Monica. I just have to know one thing.Did you go with her to Bloomingdales? Oh! Ok, ok, ok,I just really, uh, I just really need to not be with youright now.MONICA:Hi, who's this? Hi, Joanne. Is Rachelworking? It's Monica. Yes, I know I did a horrible thing.Joanna, it's not as simple as all that, ok? No, I don'tcare what Steve thinks. Hi, Steve.CAROL: How did we do?PHOEBE: Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freakedout.ROSS: I did not freak out.CAROL: Why'd you freak out?ROSS: Because it's breast milk. It's gross.CAROL: My breast milk is gross?SUSAN: This should be fun.ROSS: No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. Ijust don't think breast milk is for adults.CHANDLER: Of course the packaging does appeal togrown-ups and kids alike.CAROL: Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no bigdeal. Just taste it.ROSS: That would be no.PHOEBE: Come on. It doesn't taste bad.JOEY: Yeah, it's kinda sweet, sorta like, uh--SUSAN: Cantaloupe juice.JOEY: Exactly.ROSS: You've tasted it? You've tasted it.SUSAN: Uh huh.ROSS: Oh, you've tasted it.SUSAN: You can keep saying it, but it won't stop beingtrue.ROSS: Gimme the bottle. Gimme the towel.CHANDLER: Howdy.JOEY: Gimme a box a juice. Well, they switched meover to Hombre.CHANDLER:Well, maybe it's because of the wayyou're dressed.JOEY: Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so goodthey wanna put more people on it. You should see thisguy, Chandler, he goes through two bottles a day.CHANDLER: What do you care? You're an actor. Thisis your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything toyou.JOEY: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I likedbeing the best. I don't know. Maybe I should just getoutta the game. They need guys up in housewares toserve cheese.CHANDLER: All right, say you do that. You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. And then where're you gonna run?JOEY: Yeah I guess you're right. CHANDLER:You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie. JOEY: I'm gonna do it.CHANDLER: All right. Now go see Miss Kitty and she'll fix you up with a nice hooker.MONICA: I don't know what else to say. RACHEL: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.MONICA: I feel terrible, I really do. RACHEL:Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife?MONICA: Rachel, say that I'm friends with her, we spend some time together. Is that so terrible? RACHEL: Yes.MONICA: It's that terrible?RACHEL:Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually, but now she's actually stealing you.MONICA:Me? What are you talking about? Nobody could steal me from you. I mean, just because I'm friends with her doesn't make me any less friends with you. I mean, you're my...We're, we're...Oh, I love you.RACHEL: I love you too.PHOEBE:You guys, um I know that this really doesn't have anything to do with me, but um I love you guys too. Oh, I really needed that. MONICA: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me? RACHEL: I'd do anything for you, you know that. MONICA: I'd do anything for you.PHOEBE: Wait, wait, wait, wait!JOEY: Mornin'. I said, mornin'.TODD: I heard ya.STORE GUY: All right, everybody, I'm openin' the doors. You boys ready?TODD: Ready.JOEY: Yeah, I'm ready.CUSTOMER:You idiot, you stupid cowboy, you blinded me, I'm suing!STORE GUY: Oh my god, Todd! What the hell did you do?TODD: I'm sorry. I am such a doofus. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.ANNABELLE: My god, what happened? JOEY: These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'. Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now? ANNABELLE: Sure.JULIE: So.RACHEL: So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. I mean, you know, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, though, right?JULIE: I know, I probably shouldn't even tell you this, but I'm pretty much totally intimidated by you. RACHEL: Really? Me?JULIE: Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I really wanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got the feeling that maybe you don't. RACHEL: Well, you're not totally paranoid. JULIE: Oy.RACHEL: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right. JULIE: Thanks. Hey, listen, would you like to go to a movie sometime or something?RACHEL: Yeah, that'd be great. I'd love it. JULIE: I'd love it too. Shoot, I gotta go. So, I'll talk to you later.RACHEL:All right, Julie. What a manipulative bitch.203 The One Where Mr. Heckles Dies CHANDLER: Hey.MONICA: So how was Joan?CHANDLER: I broke up with her. CHANDLER: They were huge. When she sneezed, bats flew out of them.RACHEL: Come on, they were not that huge. CHANDLER:I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.MONICA:How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?JOEY: Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.CHANDLER: You or me?ROSS:I got it. Uh, Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.JOEY: You guys are messin' with me, right?ALL: Yeah.JOEY: That was a good one. For a second there, I was like,"whoa."PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with fora real reason.CHANDLER: Maureen Rosilla.ROSS: Not hating Yanni is not a real reason.(knock)MONICA: Hello, Mr. Heckles.MR. HECKLES: You're doing it again.MONICA: We're not doing anything.MR. HECKLES: You're stomping. It's disturbing my birds.RACHEL: You don't have birds.MR. HECKLES: I could have birds.MONICA: Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down.MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinnerparty.RACHEL: All right, bye-bye.CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice.That wasn't about being picky.ROSS: We'll give you Janice.PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."RACHEL: "Oh, my, god."JOEY: "Oh, Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"MONICA: Stop with the broom, we're not making noise.RACHEL: We won. We won!MONICA: Mr. Heckles.RACHEL: How did this happen?MR. TREEGER:He musta been sweepin'. They found abroom in his hand.MONICA: That's terrible.MR. TREEGER:I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. Itcoulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.MR. TREEGER: You never know.PHOEBE: Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in thebuilding. Go into the light, Mr. Heckles!CHANDLER: Ok, Phoebe.PHOEBE: I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That'sfine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of thingsthat I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're nottrue.JOEY: Such as?PHOEBE:Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, orevolution?ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don'tbelieve in evolution?PHOEBE: Nah. Not really.ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?PHOEBE:I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys,Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's alittle too easy.ROSS: Too easy? Too...The process of every living thing onthis planet evolving over millions of years from single-celledorganisms, too easy?PHOEBE: Yeah, I just don't buy it.ROSS:Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy,Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air webreathe, like gravity.PHOEBE: Ok, don't get me started on gravity.ROSS: You uh, you don't believe in gravity?PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don'tbelieve in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I getthe feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I ambeing pushed.(knock)CHANDLER: Uh-Oh. It's Isaac Newton, and he's pissed.MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's theother one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney.He'd like to talk to you.MONICA: What can we do for you?MR. BOYLE: All right, kids. Here's the deal. According tomy client's will, he wants to leave all his earthly possessionsto "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine".MONICA: Well, what about his family?MR. BOYLE: He didn't have any.RACHEL: Ok, so let's talk money.MR. BOYLE: All right, there was none. Let's talk signing.You be noisy girl number one, you be noisy girl number two.MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thoughthe hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you cantouch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would youlook at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!RACHEL: Have you ever seen so much crap?CHANDLER:Actually, I think this apartment sullies thegood name of crapJOEY: Check this out. Can I have this?ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?PHOEBE: Just don't. Look at this funky shirt!ROSS: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life.Ok, I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over theworld that actually show the evolution of different species,ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?ROSS: You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.PHOEBE: See, I didn't know that.ROSS: Well, there you go.PHOEBE: Huh. So now, the real question is, who put thosefossils there, and why?CHANDLER:Hey, look at this. "My Big Book ofGrievances."JOEY: Hey, there's me! April 17th. Excessive noise. Italianguy comes homes with a date. Hey Chandler, look, you're inhere too.CHANDLER: April 18th, excessive noise. Italian guy's gayroommate comes home with the dry-cleaning. Well that'sexcellent.RACHEL: Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. Is this tacky orwhat? We have to have this.MONICA: Rache, I think we have enough regular lamps.RACHEL: What? Come on, it's not like I'm asking forthis girly clock or anything, which, by the way, I alsothink is very cool.MONICA: It doesn't go with any of my stuff.RACHEL: Well, what about my stuff?MONICA: You don't have any stuff.RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don'tyou?MONICA: No.RACHEL: Yes you do. You think of it as your apartment,and I'm just somebody who rents a room.MONICA: Mmmmm.RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'mgonna go find a place for my new lamp.ROSS:Ok, Pheebs. See how I'm making these littletoys move? Opposable thumbs. Without evolution, howdo you explain opposable thumbs?PHOEBE: Maybe the overlords needed them to steertheir spacecrafts.ROSS: Please tell me you're joking.PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe insomething, and I don't.ROSS: No, no, Pheebs, we can't, ok, because--PHOEBE:What is this obsessive need you have tomake everyone agree with you? No, what's that allabout? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Rossunder the microscope.ROSS: Is there blood coming out of my ears?JOEY: Check it out, check it out. Heckles' high schoolyearbook.CHANDLER: Wow, he looks so normal.PHOEBE: He's even kind of cute.JOEY:"Heckles, you crack me up in science class.You're the funniest kid in school.CHANDLER: Funniest? Heckles?JOEY: That's what it says.CHANDLER:Wow, Heckles was voted class clown,and so was I. He was right. Would you listen to that?PHOEBE: I'd call that excessive.CHANDLER: Whoa!JOEY: What?CHANDLER:Heckles played clarinet in band, and Iplayed clarinet. And he was in the scale modeler's club,and I was, well, there was no club, but I sure thoughtthey were cool.JOEY: So, you were both dorks. Big deal.CHANDLER: I just think it's weird, you know? Hecklesand me, Heckles, and me, me and Heckles...Would youknock it off?JOEY: Have you been here all night?CHANDLER: Look at this. Pictures of all the womenthat Heckles went out with. Look what he wrote onthem. Vivian, too tall. Madge, big gums. Too loud, toosmart, makes noise when she eats. This is, this is me.This is what I do. I'm gonna end up alone, just like hedid.JOEY: Chandler, Heckles was a nut case.CHANDLER:Our trains are on the same track, ok?Yeah, sure, I'm coming up 30 years behind him, but thestops are all the same. Bitter Town. Aloneville. HermitJunction.JOEY: All right, you know what we gotta do? We gottaget you outta here. Come on, I'll buy you breakfast,let's go.CHANDLER: What if I never find someone? Or worse,what if I've found her, but I dumped her because shepronounced it "supposably"?JOEY:Chandler, come on, you're gonna findsomebody.CHANDLER: How do you know that? How?JOEY: I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.CHANDLER: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go offand get married, and I'm gonna end up alone. Will youpromise me something? When you're married, will youinvite me over for holidays?JOEY:Well, I don't know. I don't know what we'regonna be doin'. I mean, what if we're at her folks'place?CHANDLER: Yeah, I understand.JOEY: You can come over and watch the Super Bowl.Every year, all right?CHANDLER: You know what? I'm not gonna end uplike this. I'll see you man.JOEY: Supposably. Supposably. Did they go to the zoo?Supposably.CHANDLER: (on phone) Hi, it's me.JANICE: Oh, my, god.PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?CHANDLER: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult foryou to comprehend?ROSS: You remember Janice, right?CHANDLER: Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, andshe honestly cared about me. Janice is my last chanceto have somebody.JANICE: Helloo!!CHANDLER: Oh, my, god!JOEY: Geez, look how fat she got.JANICE: Hey, it's everybody.CHANDLER: Janice, you're--JANICE: Yes, I am.CHANDLER: Is it--?JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. Youare looking at a married lady now.CHANDLER: Congratulations.JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this onthe phone?JANICE:And what? Missed the expression on yourface? Janice likes to have her fun.MONICA:Hey, Rache. You know what we haven'tplayed in a while?。

老友记第二季_中英文对照剧本

Episode 1: The One with Ross's New Gilfriend[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is recapping last season, and as she talks we see a montage of scenes from Ross and Rachel.]Central Perk: 中央公园咖啡厅recap: 扼要重述montage: 蒙太奇，镜头组接，合成画面scene: 场面-Phoebe: Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far.pretty much: 几乎so far: 迄今为止到目前为止大概是这样子。

Ross was in love with Rachel since, you know, forever,in love with: 爱上forever: 永远打从一开始Ross就爱Rachel，but every time he tried to tell her, something kind of got in the way, like cats, and Italian guys.guy: 男人，家伙in the way: 在路上，挡道的Italian: 意大利人的但每次他想要表白总是会遇上阻碍，像是猫咪，意大利佬。

Finally Chandler was like "forget about her" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was in love with Rachel.forget: 忘记dig: 考古挖掘let slip: 无意中说出slip: 滑倒,犯错,减退最后Chandler劝他死心，但当Ross去中国考古时Chandler说漏嘴Ross爱Rachel。

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本206 The One With the Ba on the Bus素材

206 The One With the Baby on the Bus[Scene: At Monica and Rachel's.]MONICA:Who da wenny-Benny boy? You the Wenny-wenny-Benny-Benny boy, yes. Don't cry. Don't cry. Why is he still crying?ROSS:Let me hold him for a sec. There. (Ben stops crying) Huh? There we are.MONICA: Maye it's me.ROSS:Don't be silly. Ben loves you. He's just being Mr. Crankypants. CHANDLER:You know, I once dated a Miss Crankypants. Lovely girl, kinda moody.ROSS: There we go. All better. (gives Ben back to Monica) MONICA: There's my little boy. (Ben starts crying again) CHANDLER: Can I uh see something? (Takes Ben. When he puts him close to Monica, Ben cries. When he moves Ben away, he stops crying.) JOEY: Cool.MONICA: He hates me. My nephew hates me.ROSS: Come on, don't do this.MONICA: What if my own baby hates me? Huh? What am I gonna do then? CHANDLER: Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it's gonna be before you actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet. Joey, she does not look fat.(Chandler has a basketball which he is moving closer to, then away from, Monica)JOEY: Goo, goo, goo, waaah!MONICA: That is so funny. Let me see that. (throws the ball out the window)JOEY: Are you ok, Ross?ROSS: I don't know. What's in this pie?MONICA: Uh, I don't know, butter, eggs, flour, lime, kiwi-- ROSS: Kiwi? Kiwi? I thought it was a key lime pie.MONICA:No I didn't, I said kiwi lime. That's what makes it so special. ROSS: And that's what's gonna kill me. I'm allergic to kiwi. MONICA:No you're not. You're, you're allergic to lobster and peanuts and--oh my god.ROSS: Ugh.MONICA: Oh my god.ROSS: Ugh. It's definitely getting worse.MONICA: Is your tongue swelling up?ROSS: Either that or my mouth is getting smaller.MONICA: All right, get your coat, we're going to the hospital. JOEY: Is he gonna be ok?MONICA: Yeah, he's just gotta get a shot.ROSS:You know, you know, actually it's getting better. It is. It is. Let's not go. Anyone for Thcrabble? 206 宝宝落在巴士上了我的小不点儿你是个小小的小不点儿不要哭啊不要哭嘛他为什么还在哭?我来抱他一下来，爸爸抱不哭了或许是因为我别傻了，班爱你他只是爱发牢骚而已我跟一个牢骚小姐约过会呀好女孩，有点情绪化就是了好了，好多了这才是小乖乖我可以试一件事吗?酷哎他恨我，我的侄子恨我好啦，不要这样嘛要是我自己孩子恨我怎么办啊?摩妮卡，你住口好不好?你疯了是不是啊? 你知道你还要多久才会遇到这个问题呢? 我是说你现在连男朋友都没有乔伊，她看起来不胖拿去真好笑，那个借我一下你还好吧，罗斯?不知道馅饼里有什么呀?不知道，奶油，鸡蛋，面粉莱姆，奇异果跟…奇异果?奇异果?你说这个是奇莱馅饼不是，我是说奇异果莱姆所以才会那么特别所以我才会死我对奇异果过敏你才不会呢你会过敏的是龙虾，花生跟…越来越严重了你的舌头肿了吗?要不然就是我的嘴小了穿外套，我们现在就到医院去他不会怎么样吧?不会，只是得打一针事实上我觉得好多了没错，别去了谁要玩拼字游戏啊?去穿外套MONICA: Jacket now.ROSS: What about Ben? We can't bring a baby to a hospital. CHANDLER: We'll watch him.ROSS: I don't think tho.JOEY:What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?CHANDLER: I was looking forward to playing basketball, but I guess that's out the window.ROSS: Ok, well, if you do take him out for his walk, you might wanna bring his hat, and there's extra milk in the fridge, and there's extra diapers in the bag.JOEY: Hat, milk, got it.ROSS: ??? (speech garbled) Thro up a thro thro--a thro thro! JOEY: Consider it done.CHANDLER: You understood that?JOEY: Yeah, my uncle Sal has a really big tongue.CHANDLER: Is he the one with the beautiful wife?(Central Perk)PHOEBE:Hey Rach, wanna hear the new song I'm thinkin' of singing this afternoon? I wrote it this morning in the shower.RACHEL: Ok.PHOEBE: (singing) I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song. Stop me if you've heard it. My skin is soapy, and my hair is wet, and Tegrin spelled backward is Nirget.TERRY: Uh, Rachel, sweethea rt, could I see ya for a minute? RACHEL: What's up?TERRY: F.Y.I.. I've decided to pay a professional musician to play in here on Sunday afternoons. Her name is Stephanie... something. She's supposed to be very good.RACHEL: But what about Phoebe?TERRY: Rachel, it's not that your friend is bad, it's that she's so bad, she makes me want to put my finger through my eye into my brain and swirl it around.RACHEL: Ok, ok, so you're not a fan, but I mean, come on, you cannot do this to her.TERRY: Uh--RACHEL: Oh, no no no no. Oh no no no no. I have to do this to her? PHOEBE: (singing) Lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse, repeat, as need ed.(Chandler and Joey are loaded down with baby stuff, and Ben) CHANDLER: You know, I don't think we brought enough stuff. Did you forget to pack the baby's anvil?JOEY:It's gonna be worth it. It's a known fact that women love babies, all righ? Women love guys who love babies. It's that whole sensitive thing. Quick, aim him at that pack o' babes over there. Maybe one of them will break away. No, no wait, for get them, we got one, hard left. All right, gimme the baby.CHANDLER: No, I got him. 但是班怎么办呢?我们不能带个宝宝去医院啊交给我们吧恕难从命干嘛?我有七个天主教姐妹我照顾过上百个小孩别这样我们想帮忙，对不对?拜托，我本来想去打篮球的……不过球被丢出窗外去了好，如果你要带他去散步记得要帮他戴帽子，好吗?冰箱里还有一些牛奶尿布在袋子里懂了包在我身上啊你听得懂吗?懂啊，我沙叔叔就有大舌头他是老婆很正的那个中央公园阿秋，要不要听听我今天下午要唱的新歌呢?今天早上洗澡的时候写的我一边洗澡一边在写歌听过的话请阻止我我全身泡沫，头发湿搭搭香皂倒过来是皂香瑞秋，亲爱的麻烦你过来一下好吗?什么事啊?告诉你…我决定以后周日的下午要付钱请一位职业歌手来演出她叫什么芬妮的，很出色的伔拼嗽趺窗?瑞秋，你的朋友不是差而已她实在是差到…差到让我想把手指头伸进我的眼睛里然后把脑袋搅成浆糊那好，你不是她的歌迷可是你不能这样对她嘛你叫我出面?涂皂，冲水，再一次…视需要而定我觉得我们东西没有带够你有没有记得把宝宝的止痛药带出来? 我告诉你，这绝对值得大家都知道女人最爱宝宝了女人爱喜欢宝宝的男人这是感性的问题，懂了吗?把他对准那边那些宝贝说不定待会儿有JOEY: No, seriously.CHANDLER: Oh, seriously you want him?CAROLINE: Hello.BOYS: Hello.CAROLINE: And who is this little cutie pie?CHANDLER: Well, don't, don't think me immodest, but, me?JOEY: You wanna smell him?CAROLINE: I assume we're talking about the baby now.JOEY: Oh, yeah. He's got that great baby smell. Get a whiff of his head.CAROLINE: I think my uterus just skipped a beat.JOEY: (to Chandler) What'd I tell you? What'd I tell you? CAROLINE: I think it's great you guys are doing this. CHANDLER: Well, we are great guys.CAROLINE: You know, my brother and his boyfriend have been trying to adopt for three years. What agency did you two go through? (Central Perk)PHOEBE: But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there in chalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk. RACHEL: Honey, I'm sorry.PHOEBE: And he's going to be paying this woman? Why doesn't he just give her like a throne, and a crown, and like a, you know, gold stick with a ball on top.RACHEL: Terry is a jerk, ok? That's why we're always saying "Terry's a jerk!" That's where that came from.PHOEBE: Yeah, ok. You probably did everything you could. RACHEL: Ok, you know what, lemme, let me just see what else I can do. All right, look, look. Why don't you just let her go on after Stephanie whatever-her-name-is. I mean, you won't even be here. You don't pay her. It's not gonna cost you anything.TERRY: I, I don't know.RACHEL: Come on, Terry, I'll even clean the cappuccino machine. TERRY: You don't clean the cappuccino machine?RACHEL: Of course I clean it. I mean, I,I will cleeeean it. I mean, I will cleeeean it.TERRY: Oh, all right, fine, fine, fine.RACHEL: Done.PHOEBE: Really?RACHEL: Yeah. Who's workin' f or you babe?PHOEBE: Oh! Oh my god. This is so exciting. How much am I gonna get? RACHEL: What?PHOEBE: Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing. RACHEL: Oh, no, no no. I meant that he's gonna be paying that other woman beause she's a professional.PHOEBE: Well, I'm not gonna be the only one who's not getting paid. RACHEL: Well, but Pheebs.PHOEBE:No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. You know what, there are thousands of places in this 一个会过来来，宝宝给我快，我说真的你真的要他吗?这个小可爱是谁啊?不要怪我不懂得谦虚，刃?要不要嗅嗅他?我想你指的是宝宝吧?是呀，他的宝宝味好香嗅嗅他的头我想我的子宫刚刚顿了一下你看吧我觉得你们这样做很棒我们都是很棒的男人我弟弟跟他的男友试了三年都领养不到孩子你们是找哪一家办的?这是我的表演这是我的地盘我的名字用粉笔写在外面你不能把粉笔擦掉的对不起，我很遗憾而且他居然还要付这个女人钱那他干脆给她一个宝座一顶皇冠还有一根上面有球的权杖泰利是混蛋，所以我们才会常说”泰利是混蛋”不然我们干嘛那么说你说不定已经尽力了好吧，这样让我看看还有没有别的办法你何不让她接在那个叫黛什么芬的后面唱啊?你又不在这里，又不付她钱我不知道我帮你洗卡布基诺机好了你不洗卡布基诺机吗?我当然会我是说我会清洗我会清的对呀，看谁出马嘛天啊，好兴奋哦我会收到多少钱啊?什么?你说他要付钱给演出的人我是说他要付另外那个女人钱因为她是职业歌手我可不想当那个唯一没有收到钱的人对不起，不不，我可不是什么二流的…慈善乐团这个城市里面有上千个地方…city where people would be happy to pay to hear me play. (Out on the sidewalk, singing) When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity. (Someone puts a coin in her guitar case) Thank you! La la la la la la la....ROSS: Well, there's no way I'm gonna get a shot. Maybe they can take the needle and thquirt it into my mouth, you know, like a thquirt gun. DOCTOR:Hello, there. I'm Dr. Carlin. I see someone's having an allergic reaction.MONICA: Doctor, can I see you for just a minute please? My brother has a slight phobia about needles.ROSS: Did you tell him about my thquirt gun idea?MONICA: My brother, the PhD would like to know if there's any way to treat this orally.DOCTOR: No, under these circumstances it has to be an injection, and it has to be now.ROSS: Tho?(Monica shakes her head.)ROSS: Ohhh.MONICA: That's good, have a seat. Um, the doctor says it's gotta be a needle. You're just gonna have to be brave, ok? Can you do that for me?ROSS: Ok.MONICA:Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross, don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of my hand!CHANDLER: That's a good plan, Joe. Next time we wanna pick up women, we should just go to the park and make out. Taxi, taxi!JOEY: Hey, hey, look at that talent.CHANDLER: (to taxi driver) Just practicing. You're good. Carry on. GIRL 1 ON BUS: Hey, you. He's just adorable.CHANDLER: Ok, but can you tell him that, because he thinks he's too pink.GIRL 2 ON BUS: So what are you guys out doing today?JOEY:Oh we're not out. No, no. We're just uh, two heterosexual guys, hanging with the son of our other heterosexual friend, doin' the usual straight guy stuff.CHANDLER: You done?JOEY: Yeah.GIRL 1: Oh, there's our stop.JOEY: Get outta here. This is our stop too.GIRL 2: You guys live around here too?JOEY:Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. We live in the building by the uh sidewalk. CHANDLER: You know it?JOEY: Hey, look, since we're neighbors and all, what do you say we uh, get together for a drink?GIRL 1: So uh, you wanna go to Marquel's?CHANDLER: Oh, sure, they love us over there.GIRL 2: Where's your baby? …愿意付钱听我来演唱我为自己而演唱我不需要你的施舍谢谢你说什么都别想叫我打针我是说，或许他们可以把……药水射进我的嘴里就像水枪那样你们好，我是林医生好像有人有一点点过敏的反应对，医生我可以单独跟你谈谈吗?我哥哥有一点点窖十的丁针你有没有告诉他我那个水枪的主意?我的博士哥哥想知道…这个药有没有可能用口服的?在这种情况之下，打针是避免不了的，而且要马上打针怎么样?好吧，坐下来医生说这一针非打不可所以你一定要勇敢起来为我这么做，好不好?你做得非常好要不要握紧我的手啊?罗斯，不要握得那么紧真的，不要握那么紧罗斯，放开我的手还真是个好计昼下一回想泡妞……我们干脆直接去公园亲热算了计程车…你看那票妞儿只是在练习，你很行继续开吧等等，等等我们他好可爱哦告诉他，好不好?他觉得他脸色太红润了你们今天出来做什么?我们没有我们只是帮我们的异性恋朋友……带孩子的异性恋男人做一般男人应该做的事情讲完了?讲完了?少来了，我们才到了你们也住在这附近啊?我们住在那个人行道旁边你们知道吗?对了，既然大家是邻居嘛我们聚一聚喝点东西，如何?我们去马可咖啡厅，好吗?你们的宝宝呢?CHANDLER AND JOEY: (running after bus) Ben! Ben! Ben! CHANDLER: Oh, that's good. Maybe he'll hear you and pull the cord. BOTH: Stop the bus! Wait! Wait! Wait!MONICA: Are you sure he didn't break it because it really hurts. DOCTOR: No, it's just a good bone bruise. And, right here is the puncture wound from your ring.ROSS: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. Sorry. Sorry! Hey! Hey! I got my s's back! Which we can celebrate later. Celebrate.PHOEBE:(singing) ... with the double double double-jointed boy. Hey. So um, are you the professional guitar player?STEPHANIE: Yeah. I'm Stephanie.PHOEBE:Right. My name was on there, but now it just says "carrot cake". So, um, so um, how many chords do you know?STEPHANIE: All of them.PHOEBE: Oh yeah, so you know D?STEPHANIE: Yeah.PHOEBE: Ok, do you know A minor?STEPHANIE: Yeah.PHOEBE: Ok, do you know how to go from D to A minor? STEPHANIE: Yeah.PHOEBE: Ok. Um, so does your guitar have a strap?STEPHANIE: No.PHOEBE: Oh. Mine does. (singing) Stephanie knows all the chords. (makes a face)CHANDLER: (on pay phone) Come on, pick up, pick up! Hello? Transit Authority? Yes, hello. I'm doing research for a book, and I was wondering what someone might do if they left a baby on a city bus. Yes I do realize that would be a very stupid charact er.JOEY:Hi, here's the deal. We lost a carseat on a bus today. It's white plastic, with a handle, and it fits onto a stroller. Oh, and there was a baby in it. He wants to talk to you again.RACHEL:Ok, everybody, let's give a uh nice warm Central Perk welcome to--PHOEBE: (singing angrily) Terry's a jerk, and he won't let me work, and I hate Central Perk!RACHEL: Uh, to Stephanie Schiffer.STEPHANIE: Thank you. I'd like to start with a song that I wrote for the first man I ever loved. (singing) Zachary.PHOEBE: (singing/screaming) You're all invited to bite me! CHANDLER AND JOEY: Hi. We're the guys who called about the baby. We left the baby on ths bus. Is he here? Is he here?TRANSIT AUTHORITY GUY: He's here. (Chandler and Joey hug each other in relief) I'm assuming one of you is the father.CHANDLER: That's me.JOEY: I'm him.CHANDLER: Actually, uh, we're both the father. (Puts his arm around Joey)BOTH (but to different babies): Oh, Ben! Hey, buddy! 或许他会听到拉铃啊停车你肯定没有捏断?我真的很痛没有，只是有一块瘀青还有这是你戒指压出来的痕迹对不起，我真的很抱歉没关系抱歉…我说清楚了那我们待会儿再庆祝那我们待会儿再庆祝他是个双双双双关节男孩你就是那个专业的吉他手吗?对，我叫黛芬对，上面本来有我名字的现在只剩红萝卜糕了你会弹几个和弦?全都会啊是吗?那你会D调那你会A小调吗?你会从D和弦转到A小调吗?那你的吉他有背带吗?我的有黛芬什么和弦都会运输中心吗?我在帮一本书做调查如果有人把婴儿留在市公车上那该怎么办呢?是，我知道只有笨蛋才会这么做我们今天在公车上掉了汽车安全座椅白塑胶材质有把手，可以用在推车上面里面还有一个婴儿他要跟你讲各位我们以最热烈的掌声欢迎…我恨中央咖啡园欢迎史黛芬首先我想唱一首我为我的初恋情人写的歌柴克力…被邀来咬我我们打过电话来公车上的婴儿怎么样了?到了没有…到了你们之中有一个是父亲吧是我！是我！事实上呢，我们两个都是你知道哪个是班吗?那个T恤上有鸭子这个有小丑班绝对是穿着鸭子T恤的或小丑CHANDLER: Please tell me you know which one is our baby.JOEY: Well, well that one has ducks on his t-shirt, and this one has clowns. And Ben was definitely wearing ducks.CHANDLER: Ok.JOEY: Or clowns. Oh, oh wait. That one's definitely Ben. Remember, he had that cute little mole by his mouth.CHANDLER: Yeah?JOEY: Yeah.CHANDLER: Hey, Ben, remember us? Ok, the mole came off.JOEY: Ahh!CHANDLER: What're we gonna do? What're we gonna do?JOEY: Uh, uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns.CHANDLER: Oh, we're gonna flip for the baby?JOEY: You got a better idea?CHANDLER: All right, call it in the air.JOEY: Heads.CHANDLER: Heads it is.JOEY: Yes! Whew!CHANDLER: We have to assign heads to something.JOEY: Right. Ok, ok, uh, ducks is heads, because ducks have heads. CHANDLER: What kind of scary-ass clowns came to yo ur birthday? (on the sidewalk outside Central Perk)RACHEL: Hey.PHOEBE: Oh, hi.RACHEL: Here. I thought you might be cold.PHOEBE: Thank you.RACHEL: Whoa, look at you, you did pretty well.PHOEBE: Eight dollars and 27 cents. But not really, 'cause I put in the first two, just to, you know, get the ball rolling, and to make myself feel better.RACHEL: Do you?PHOEBE: No. This whole like playing-for-money thing is so not good for me. You know, I don't know, when I sang "Su-Su-Suicide", I got a dollar seventy-five. But then, "Smelly Cat", I got 25 cents and a condom. So you know, now I just feel really bad for Smelly Cat. RACHEL: Well, you know, honey, I don't think everybody gets Smelly Cat. You know, I mean, if all you've ever actually had are healthy pets, then, whoosh!PHOEBE: It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it's like, it's just all about the money. RACHEL: Well, people missed you in there. And in fact, there was actually a request for "Smelly Cat".PHOEBE: Really? From who?RACHEL: Well, from me. And I know it's not your big money song, but it's my favorite.KID:Hi. Uh, did I accidentally drop a condom in your case? It's kind of an emergency.PHOEBE: Yeah. Here you go. 等一下，那个绝对是班记得他嘴边那颗可爱的小痣班，记得我们吗?天啊，痣掉了我们该怎么办?丢铜板决定，鸭或小丑要丢铜板决定你有更好的主意吗?好吧，在空中叫头就是头我们得决定头是哪一个好的鸭子是头，因为鸭子有头帮你庆祝生日的小丑没有头不会吓坏你吗?叫我清晨天使在离开我之前叫我清晨天使然后转身离去我不会求你留下来陪我来，我想你可能会冷谢谢看看你，干得不错嘛这里一共是八块又二十七分其实没那么多啦头两块是我放的只是让钱滚滚来还有让自己舒服一点结果呢?为了钱演奏这码子事对我非常的不好我不知道当我唱到”自杀”．，…我得到一块七十五分钱可是”臭臭猫”呢?十五分钱跟一个保险套所以现在我为”臭臭猫”感到很难过我不认为大家都会懂”臭臭猫”啊我是说如果你只要养过健康的猫的话可是根本就不是那个嘛本来我唱歌只是因为我很高兴可是现在却变成全都是为了钱菲此，大家都很想你事实上还有人指名要听”臭臭猫”呢真的啊?是谁呢?我啊，就是我我知道那不是赚大钱的歌佄易钕不兜木褪悄鞘?我是不是不小心丢了一个保险套啊?情况紧急嘛情况紧急嘛KID: Thanks a lot. Hey Christine, I got it!(chez Monica and Rachel)ROSS: I just wanna thank you for being there for me today. And I'm sorry I,I almost broke your hand.MONICA: That's ok. I'm sorry I poisoned you.ROSS:Yeah. Hey, remember the time I jammed that pencil into your hand? MONICA: Remember it? What do you think this is, a freckle? ROSS: Oh.MONICA: Wait, what about the time I hit you in the face with the Silvian's pumpkin?ROSS:Oh, man. Oh, remember when I stuck that broom in your bike spokes, and you flipped over and hit your head on the curb?MONICA: No. But I remember people telling me about it.ROSS: I hope Ben has a little sister.MONICA: Yeah. I hope she can kick his ass.ROSS: I'm gonna get a new band-aid. Hey, how 'bout the time I cut the legs off your Malibu Ken?MONICA: That was you?ROSS: They, uh, were infected. He wouldn't have made it. MONICA:Aw, my little nephew. Come here, little one. There's my little baby Ben. Hey, my little boy. Hey, he's not crying.CHANDLER: (looking fearfully at Joey) Hey, he's not crying.(Ben starts crying)JOEY: Yes! There's still pie.ROSS:I'm here. How's my little boy? Want Daddy to change your diaper? So, did you have fun with Uncle Joey and Uncle Chandler today? JOEY: Oh, yeah, he rode the bus today.ROSS:Ohhh. Big boy, riding the bus--Hey, I have a question. How come it says Property of Human Services on his butt?CHANDLER: You, you are gonna love this.ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here. CHANDLER: Stay back, I've got kiwi. Run, Joey, Run! STEPHANIE: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?PHOEBE: No, no, no. I'm sorry. It's "smelly cat, smel-ly cat". STEPHANIE: Smelly cat, smel-ly cat...PHOEBE: Better. Yeah.STEPHANIE: Yeah?PHOEBE:Yeah, much better. And you know what, don't feel bad, because it's a hard song.STEPHANIE: Yeah.PHOEBE: You wanna try it again?STEPHANIE: Yeah. From the top?PHOEBE:Ok, there is no top. That's the beauty of Smelly Cat. Um, why don't you just follow me?STEPHANIE: Ok.PHOEBE: Mmmm hmmm.TOGETHER: Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly 克丽丝，拿到了我只是想要谢谢你今天的帮忙对不起，我差点捏断你的手没关系，抱歉你中了我的毒你还记得我用铅笔戳你的手那回吗?记得吗?你以为这是什么?雀斑啊等等，那我用薇恩的南瓜打你脸那一次呢?天啊，记得我把扫把插进你脚踏车轮里…结果你翻车头撞到路边那次吗不，我记得是别人告诉我那件事我希望班有个小妹妹希望她能够好好的整整他我去拿一个新的绷带我切下你马里布肯娃娃的腿那次呢?是你干的啊?对，它的腿发炎了不切的话它会死我的小侄子过来，小东西我的小宝贝班班他居然没有哭他没哭呀还有馅饼我在，我在我的小宝贝好吗?要爸爸帮你换尿布，对不对?我知道…你今天跟乔伊叔叔还有钱德叔叔玩得开心吗?开心，他今天坐公车了好耶，大男生坐公车喔我有个问题耶他的小屁股上为什么会有”服务处财产”这些字?你一定会觉得很精采的帮我抱一下班，好吗?别过来，我有奇异果跑呀，乔伊臭臭猫…你都吃些什么啊?不对…对不起臭臭猫…好一点了好多了你知道吗?不要难过这首歌本来就很难要不要再试一次?好，从头这次没有头，好吗?那是”臭臭猫”的美妙之处臭臭猫…他们喂你什么?。

Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第二十二集

OPENINGTITLES
[Scene:CentralPerk.Chandler,Ross,Joey,Phoebe,andMonicaareplanningRache'sbirthdayparty.]
ROSS:ItalkedtoRachel'ssisters,neitherofthemcancome.
MONICA:Ok,we'renothavingbirthdaycake,we'rehavingbirthdayflan.
CHANDLER:Excuseme?
MONICA:It'satraditionalMexicancustarddessert.
JOEY:Ohthat'snice.HappybirthdayRachel,here'ssomegoo.
CHANDLER:Ormaybeshedoesn'tstealstuffandJoeyjustsleptwithherandnevercalledherback.
MONICA:Joeythatishorriable.
JOEY:HeyIlikedher,alright.Maybe,maybetoomuch.Idon'tknowIguessIjustgotscared.
PHOEBE:I'msorry,Ididn'tknow.
JOEY:Ididn'tthinkanyone'dbuythat,ok.
[Rachelenters]
ROSS:Hihoney,howdiditgo?
RACHEL:Agh,itwasthegraduationfromhell.
CHANDLER:Yaknow,mycousinwenttohellonafootballscholarship.

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本201 The One With Ross' New Girlfriend素材

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本208 The One With the List素材

208 The One With the List[Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are there, discussing the night before.]RACH: Ross kissed me.MNCA: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!RACH: It was unbelievable!MNCA: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!PHOE:Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug the phone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?RACH: Oh, it ended very well.PHOE: Oh.MNCA:[getting the wine] Do not start without me. Do not start without me.PHOE: Ok, all right, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like, was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a, you know, a "I gotta have you now" kind of thing?RACH: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh, god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.PHOE: Ok, so, ok, was he holding you? Or was his hand like on your back?RACH:No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were in my hair.PHOE/MNCA: Ohhhh.[Scene: Ross' apartment. Ross, Chandler, and Joey are there eating pizza.]ROSS: And, uh, and then I kissed her.JOEY: Tongue?ROSS: Yeah.JOEY: Cool.Opening Credits[Scene:Central Perk. Joey, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there; Chandler is showing everyone his new computer.]CHAN: All right, check out this bad boy. 12 megabytes of ram. 500 megabyte hard drive. Built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 b.p.s.PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?CHAN: [doggedly] Games and stuff.MNCA: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.JOEY: [reading over her shoulder] Wait, here's one. Uh, would you be will ing to cook naked?MNCA: There's an ad for a naked chef?JOEY:No, but if you're willing to cook naked, then you might be willing to dance naked. And then... [rubs his fingers together] 208 清单罗斯亲了我很不可思议吧现在全部从实招来摩妮卡，拔掉电话线拿酒来瑞秋，结局好不好?我们需不需要面纸? 结局非常好等我来再讲…先谈谈那个吻是像轻拂过你嘴唇的轻吻呢…还是像…”我现在就要你”的那种吻呢刚开始很热烈，然后·，天啊，然后我们就完全沉醉了他抱着你吗?还是说他的手在你的背上呢?不，他的手开始时在我腰’然后往上滑，最后落在我头发上…然后我吻了她舌头?对各位，瞧瞧这个坏小子12MG RAM 500MG的硬盘里面还有内建试算表的功能…再加上传输速度超过两万八BPS的数据机你要用它来干嘛啊?玩游戏之类的根本没有工作没有适合我的工作等一下，这边有一个你愿意裸体做菜吗?有征裸体厨师的广告?没有，但你如果愿意裸体做菜，你或许会愿意裸体跳舞然后对了，昨晚亲得怎么样了?那真风趣，风趣得很痛苦对，只是痛苦而已我以为昨天晚上很棒耶没错，是很棒但是当我回到家…我看到芙莉的食盐水放在我床边的桌上…我就想”老天啊我到底在做什么呀?”我跟芙莉这么好的女人在一起…而我就那样抛弃一切吗?瓶食盐水可以讲那么多?我们现在是在谈瑞秋你跟瑞秋我梦想我跟瑞秋一起想了十年了[Ross enters, distraught.]ROSS: Hi.PHOE: Hey, oh, so, um...how'd you make out last night?ROSS: That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's just painfulMNCA: Wait a minute. I thought last night was great.ROSS: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?JOEY: You got all that from saline solution?MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.ROSS:Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... [Rachel enters, carrying a tray]... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.RACH: [to Ross] Hey, you.ROSS: How are you?RACH: Good. How are you?ROSS: Good.[Julie enters.]JULIE: Hi, honey.ROSS: Hi, Julie. [nervous] Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you? JULIE: Good.ROSS: [uncomfortable] Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonna play something, Phoebe?PHOE: Oh, well, actually.ROSS: [impatient] Play it.PHOE: Ok, all right.JOEY: Hey, Julie, I didn't know you wore lenses.JULIE: What?ROSS: [to Joey] Ssshh.PHOE: Ok, um, hi, hello, hi, ok, so, um, this is a song about a love triangle between three people that I made up. Um, it's called, um, "Two of Them Kissed Last Night".[Ross and Rachel look at each other and then at Phoebe, realizing the song is about their situation.]PHOE:[singing] There was a girl, we'll call her Betty, and a guy let's call him Neil. Now I can't stress this point too strongly, this story isn't real. Now our Neil must decide, who will be the girl that he casts aside. Will Betty be the one who he loves truly? Or will it be the one who we'll call Ju...Loolie? He must decide, he must decide, even though I made him up, he must decide![Scene:Mr. Ratstatter's (RTST) office. Monica is there about a job.] RTST: This is a nice resume. Nice, nice, nice. Muy impressivo. MNCA: So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear. 但现在我跟朱丽在一起就好像我跟芙莉，我跟瑞秋我跟芙莉，我跟瑞秋…瑞秋?瑞秋瑞秋?瑞秋很好，你呢?很好你好吗?很好大家都在大家都很好你不是要弹什么吗，菲此?我不知道你戴隐形眼镜什么?好，嗨哈罗，好，嗨所以，这是一首关于一个……我乱编的三角恋爱故事的歌叫做”昨晚两个接吻了”有个女孩，我们叫她贝蒂有个男孩，口引门叫他尼尔我再三强调这一点这故事不是真的现在尼尔必须决定他要放弃哪一个是那个他真心相爱的贝蒂还是我们称为露莉的女孩他必须决定，他必须决定虽然他纯属虚构，他必须决定你的资历很不错可以说非常的可观这份工作到底是什么呢?广告写得很含糊麻克力种完全人工的巧克力替代品别客气，试一块对，我们认为麻克力此巧克力好吃的多了我爱这碎碎的感觉巧克力不会这样不会反正呢，这个食品药物管理局应该很快就会通过检验了希望能够赶得上感恩节…霸占了大部份跟大餐有关的节日，复活节，圣诞节等我们在想，只要行销搞好了……我们能让感恩节成为麻克力节你不吞下去吗?我只是在等泡泡停止是不是很棒?…在找几个厨师来搞一些新感恩节食谱这下你有兴趣吗?up stuff together."PHOE: No offense, but that sounds nothing like her.[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is up in arms about the Rachel/Julie situation.]ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.CHAN: Oh, I know. This must be so hard. Oh, no. Two women love me. They're both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight.JOEY: Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer] CHAN: Don't touch the computer. Don't ever touch the computer. JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.[Ross gives him an insulted look.]CHAN: Ok, all right, look. Let's get logical about this, ok? We'll make a list. Rachel and Julie, pros and cons. Oh. We'll put their names in bold, with different fonts, and I can use different colors for each column.ROSS: Can't we just use a pen?CHAN: No, Amish boy.JOEY: Ok, let's start with the cons, 'cause they're more fun. All right, Rachel first.ROSS: I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiled sometimes.JOEY: You could say that.ROSS:And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, an d Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.CHAN: Waitress. Got it. You guys wanna play Doom? Or we could keep doing this. What else?ROSS: I don't know.JOEY: Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.CHAN: Ok, let's do Julie. What's wrong with her?ROSS: [long pause] She's not Rachel.[Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica has made food for Phoebe and Rachel to taste.]MNCA:Ok, this is pumpkin pie with mockolate cookie crumb crust. This is mockolate cranberry cake, and these are mockolate chip cookies. Just like the Indians served.[Rachel takes a bite.]RACH: Oh my god.MNCA: Oh my god good?RACH: Oh my god, I can't believe you let me put this in my mouth. [Rachel runs to the sink to spit it out.]PHOE: Oh, oh sweet Lord! This is what evil must taste like! [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is on the phone with a computer hotline.]CHAN: I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that 我们也可以继绩还有呢?我不知道她的脚踝有一点胖换芙莉了她有什么不好的?她不是瑞秋这是麻克力饼屑南瓜馅饼这个是麻克力红莓蛋糕而这些是麻克力饼干跟印第安人的一样天啊我不敢相信你给我吃这个这一定是万恶之味我说这个玩意儿不能印对，那个按钮我按了一百次了对热线而言，你没有那么热什么?我听到了什么?你在看”星舰迷航记”?你让芙莉心碎了吗?是啊，好可十自，她哭，我也哭她丢东西，打到了我我这么做是对的史巴克真的拥抱了他爸爸吗?你去哪儿了?你去哪儿了?…从芙莉那边回来不是你想的那样是别的事什么是别的事?什么是别的事?他跟芙莉分手了老天在上，去抱抱她呀真的我爱的一直是你这真好我们出去走一走怎么样?就我们两个人好，我去拿外套好，不…我帮你拿他去帮我拿外套他去帮我拿外套，乔伊我真不敢相信我看到我的名字，是什么?不，不，你看…在印了在印了那是什么嘛?给我看有人订外套吗?罗斯，钱德在电脑上写了关于我的事还不让我看因为那是不是RACH: And I'm in it? Then let me read it.CHAN, JOEY, ROSS: No!RACH: Come on.JOEY: Hey, uh, why don't you read it to her?[Ross and Chandler stare angrily at Joey, who thinks he has come up with a good idea.]CHAN: [through gritted teeth] Alright. [clears his throat] "It was summer, a nd it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. 'Oh, look,' cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The en d." ROSS:That's it? That's all you wrote? You're the worst writer in the whole world.RACH: All right, you know what? This isn't funny anymore. There's something about me on that piece of paper and I want to see it. ROSS: No, you don't.RACH: All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. I do not need to see it. [Rachel grabs the paper and runs across the room, reading it to herself.] RACH: What is this? Ross, what is this?CHAN: Good luck.[Chandler and Joey leave quickly.]ROSS: Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok? RACH: Kind of ditzy? Too into her looks? Spoiled?ROSS: Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.RACH: Just a waitress?ROSS: No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rach?RACH: Oh! I do not have chubby ankles![Rachel leaves, and Ross follows her into the hall.]ROSS: No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.RACH:She is not Rachem. What the hell's a Rachem? Is that some stupid paleontology word that I wouldn't know because I'm just a waitress. [She goes into her apartment and slams the door.]ROSS: No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?[Scene:Central Perk. Chandler, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are there.] CHAN: My diary! My diary, that's brilliant. I should have to ld her it was my diary, she never would have made me read her my diary. MNCA: You know, that's true. You'd be a great person to have around the day after an emergency.PHOE: I... I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus. JOEY: Hey, cut him some slack. It was Chandler's idea.PHOE: What?MNCA: What?CHAN: Oh good, I was hoping that would come up.MNCA: This was your idea?PHOE: What were you thinking? 很好，我正在希望你提呢这是你的主意?拜托，你们想一下事出必有因对，是你呀菲菲，帮我一下，好吗?你相信宿命那套狗屁，对吧?对，祝你下辈子当大便虫好运瑞秋瑞秋，瑞秋，开门当别人不开门让你进来的时候男6表示”走开”那并不表示请你爬防火梯上来我只是想念一点你的优点给你听我不感兴趣”第一，你看游戏节目时会哭第二，你对你朋友的感情第三，你紧张的时候玩你头发的样子第四，勇敢地开始你的新生活第五，你很会逗小班第六，还有你的香味”罗斯，你在干什么?乔伊，帮我开窗，好不好?好呀，来你在外面干什么?我…我…天啊，你一定冷死了知道你需要什么吗? 来杯热腾腾的麻克力怎么样?阿秋，别这样嘛你再给我一次机会也许我们该离开一下不，你们真的不用走我们已经谈完了拜托，我知道你一定…不，你不，罗斯想像一下你觉得自己最糟的地方如果这个世界上你最信任的人…不只也这样想而且用来当做不跟你在一起的理由，换了你会怎么样?就算是那样我还是想要跟你在一起你真是宽宏大量，罗斯我说，别走你知道吗?如果今天是你列单子……不管你在单子上头写些什么都阻止不了我跟你在一起我猜我们就是那一点不同我绝对不会去列单子每一次遇上这种情况我都不知道要等多久才能开口我再等一会儿好了CHAN: [squirming] All right, let's get some perspective here, ok? These things, they happen for a reason.MNCA: Yeah. You!CHAN:All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don't you?PHOE: Yeah, by the way, good luck in your next life as a dung beetle. [Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]ROSS: Rach! Whoops! Rach, hey, open up, please!RACH: [coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape. ROSS: I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.RACH: Not interested.[Rachel closes the drapes over the window, goes into her bedroom and closes the doo r.]ROSS: [reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.[Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter, confused.]ROSS: Number six: the way you smell.JOEY: [opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?ROSS: Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?JOEY: Oh, yeah, I do.[He opens the window, Ross comes in, soaked.]CHAN: What are you doing out there?ROSS: I am, uh, I am...MNCA: Oh, you must be freezing. You know what you need? How about a nice steaming cup of hot Mockolate?[Ross runs to Rachel's bedroom, knocking on the door.]ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.[Rachel opens the door.]RACH: No.ROSS: No?RACH: That's what I said.CHAN: Look, maybe we should go?RACH: No, you guys, you really don't have to go, we're done talking. ROSS: Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.RACH: [near tears] No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.ROSS: No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things. RACH:Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. [to the others] I said don't go! 我其中的一些食谱用的麻克力份量或许有点不寻常像这个椰子麻克力干果棒我上面写了四杯椰子四杯碎干果……而只有一大匙的麻克力没关系食品药物管理局没有通过实验室老鼠出了问题是呀反正，这是给你的支票还有谢谢你出了这么多力你做的时候没有吃很多吧?我吃了一些一些，那还好些可以，一些不是很多那你尿尿的时候没有灼痛的感觉吧?又是他吗?告诉他我很想去接可是我脚踝太粗走不动我想现在时机不对你帮我一个忙，好不好?当然，什么事?好的音乐?没问题下一首是罗斯要点给瑞秋的歌曲瑞秋，他要你知道他为他的行为深感抱歉…希望你能从心里原谅他看到你眼若冰霜看到你浑身带刺我会等你的上天实在作弄人她就让我苦苦的等不论你是否在身旁，我会等的我们刚接到瑞秋的电话她告诉我们罗斯做了什么真令人发指罗斯，如果你在听……我不想再放你点的歌了我们何不将时间留给还有机会的情侣艾佛米雪很抱歉用她的车撞你她希望你们能够解决问题我有个房间……可以去倾吐心中的秘密在我房里谢谢你再度光临不客气我既无道德又需要钱我们真是一丘之貉这个东西叫做开心鱼ROSS: You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.RACH: Well, then, I guess that's the difference between us. See, I'd neve r make a list.[She closes the door in his face. Ross walks sullenly back to the couch and sits down. A moment of silence ensues.]JOEY:[quietly] I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this type of a situation before you can talk again, you know? [Ross stares blankly at him] Maybe a little longer.[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.]MNCA: Now, in some of these recipes, the quantities may seem just a little unusual, uh, like these coconut mockolate holiday nut bars. I've indicated four cups of coconut, and four cups of crushed nut, and only, uh, one tablespoon of mockolate.RTST: Doesn't matter.MNCA: What?RTST:Our FDA approval didn't come through. Something about laboratory rats.MNCA: Oh, gosh, I'm sorry.RTST:Yeah, well, anyhoo, here is your check. [hands it to her] Thank you for all the trouble you went through. Um, listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking, did you?MNCA: Well, uh, I ate some.RTST: Oh, some, that's fine. Some is fine. Some is not a lot. So, it doesn't burn when you pee, does it?[Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Rachel are there.] (phone rings)MNCA: Hello?[Ross is at his apartment.]ROSS: Hi.RACH: [to Monica] Is that him again? Tell him I'd come to the phone, but my ankles are weighin' me down.MNCA: [to Ross] Listen, I... I don't think this is the bes t time. ROSS: Look, can, can you do something for me?MNCA: Sure, what? Ok, ok. [hangs up the phone] [to Rachel] Music? [Monica turns on the radio.]RADIO:The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You pla ys) [Rachel seems touched. She pauses for a moment, then picks up the phone and starts to dial. Cut to Ross at his apartment.]RADIO:Uh, we've just g otten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.] 吃起来是跟开心果一样的·，但主要是用鱼肉重新压制的来，试试看好吧你没有什么过敏问题吧? 猫毛抱歉。

Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本120

Ross:That's, that's nice twice!
Monica:Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar?
Joey:Duh, where've you been?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there except Rachel.]
Chandler:(on phone, reading from a script) Oh, Danielle! I wasn't expecting the machine... Give me a call when you get a chance. (Rattles some dishes) Bye-bye. (Hangs up.) Oh God!
Rachel:All right. All right, all right, all right, all right, I know it's stupid! I will go see him this afternoon, and I will just put an end to it!
[Scene: Barry's Office, the post-coital Barry and Rachel are recovering on the chair.]
Rachel:Wow... Wow!
Barry:Yeah.
Rachel:I'm not crazy, right? I mean, it was never like that.

Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第三集

JOEY:Such as?
PHOEBE:Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, or evolution?
ROSS:Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS:We'll give you Janice.
PHOEBE:I miss Janice though. "Hello,ChandlerBing."
RACHEL:"Oh, my, god."
JOEY:"Oh,Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"
PHOEBE:You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
CHANDLER:Maureen Rosilla.
ROSS:Not hating Yanni is not a real reason.
(knock)
MONICA:Hello, Mr. Heckles.
MONICA:What can we do for you?
MR. BOYLE:All right, kids. Here's the deal. According to my client's will, he wants to leave all his earthly possessions to "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine".

Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第十集

[Scene:Monica, Fun Bobby, and Phoebe sitting inCentral PerkRachel is serving them. She brings a mug to Monica.]
MNCA:Rach, does this have nonfat milk?
RACH:Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.
Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季
210 The One With Russ
[The gang is walking to a newsstand late at night. Joey is anxiously in the lead.]
RACH:Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.
JOEY:Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me... [Fun Bobby picks Joey up off the ground, bounces him. Joey laughs.] Alright! It still works.
FBOB:OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up? [everyone raises their hands] I'm still gonna go.
PHOE:Two.
RACH:I had one glass.

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本214 The One With the Prom Video素材

214 The One With the Prom Video[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is playing foosball by himself, Joey enters]JOEY: Hey.CHANDLER: Hey. Hold on a second. [shoots a goal] Huh?JOEY: Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.CHANDLER: What's this?JOEY: Eight hundred and twelve bucks.CHANDLER: Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you want me for the whole night. What is this for? JOEY: Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electric bills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count.I love ya man.CHANDLER: Well, thanks man. Now I can get my pony.JOEY: Hey, this is a little extra somethin' for uh, ya know, always bein' there for me. [hands Chandler a jewelry box]CHANDLER:Wo w, I don't know what to say. [opens the box and pulls out an incredibly gaudy gold bracelet] Wow, I, I don't know what to say. JOEY: Heh, what d'ya say?CHANDLER: I don't know. It's a bracelet.JOEY: Isn't it? And it's engraved too, check it out. CHANDLER: [reads] To my best bud. [puts it back in the case] Thanks best bud.JOEY: Put it on.CHANDLER: Oh, now? [puts it in his desk drawer] No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion. [sets a chair in front of the drawer]JOEY:Oh, no no, that's the beauty part, it goes with everything. [gets the bracelet from the drawer] You put this on, you're good to go. [puts the bracelet on Chandler] Ohhh man, you are so wearin' that bracelet. CHANDLER: I so am.JOEY: You have any idea what this'll do for your sex life? CHANDLER: Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extra weight, I'll be back on track.OPENING TITLES[Scene: A kitchen somewhere. Monica is interviewing for a job] INTERVIEWER: Well, this all looks good.MONICA: Great.INTERVIEWER: And if I want to call for a reference on your last job? MONICA:Oh, that's there on the bottom, see the manager, Chandler Bing. INTERVIEWER: Alright, lets see if you're as good in person as you are on paper. Make me a salad.MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like. 214 高中舞会录影带等一下好球...有东西给你这什么东西?812块钱我不知道老李跟你怎么说的跟我过夜……可要一千大洋才够这是干什么呀?我现在有赚钱了这是要还你帮我付的电费跟数不清的披萨的钱我爱你谢了，老兄我有钱可以买小马了这是我小小的心意……谢谢你平日的照顾我不晓得该说什么了怎么样?我不知道这是个手镯吧?上头还刻了字，你看看”我的好兄弟”谢了，好兄弟戴上去啊现在吗?不…这么美的东西应该留到特殊的场合再戴不…妙就妙在这里这配什么都好看老兄，你戴起来简直好看啊天啊真是太配你了可不是嘛你知道这对你的性生活有什么样的影响吗?刚开始时说不定会让我慢半拍等到习惯这个重量之后就会让我重振雄风了看起来很好，那就好了如果我要打电话询问你以前的经验呢? 就写在下面了我经理叫做钱德宾好吧来看看你是不是跟你写的—样好，做一份沙拉来瞧瞧沙拉?其实我可以做些难度比较高的不用，沙拉就行了没问题MONICA:Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent. ROSS: Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.MONICA: No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.ROSS: Oh OK. Well then why don't you, uhh, why don't you borrow it from mom and dad? You feel guilty and tense around them already. You might as well make some money off of them.CHANDLER: Ya know, the man's got a point. [gestures with his arm and the bracelet falls off]PHOEBE: What is that sparkly thing?CHANDLER:That thing, it's a uhh. . . yeah it's, it's a little flashy. ROSS: No no, no no, it's not flashy, not for a Goodfella. MONICA: Man, man that is sharp. It must have cost you quite a few debloons.[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica answers the door and lets her parents in. They are carrying boxes.]MONICA: Hi.MR. GELLER: Hi.MRS. GELLER: Hi darling.MONICA: So, what's this.MR. GELLER: Some of your old stuff.MRS. GELLER: Well sweetie, we have a surprise for you. We're turning your room into a gym.MONICA: Wow, that is a surprise. Just one little question, uh, why not Ross's room?MR. GELLER: Gosh, we talked about that but your brother has so many science trophies and plaques and merit badges, well we didn't want to disturb them.MONICA: Oh, God forbid.[Rachel enters with a laundry basket]MRS. GELLER: Oh, hi Rachel.RACHEL: Hi.MRS. GELLER: Oh, we were so sorry to hear about your parents splitting up, dear.RACHEL:Oh, well, you know, they're just separated so, you know, never know, we'll see.MR. GELLER: Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappy ever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.RACHEL: What, what incident?MR. GELLER: Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don't you have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. [shuffles her into her room][Scene: Central Perk. Chandler an d Phoebe are sitting on couches. A beautiful woman is looking at Chandler.]PHOEBE: Do you want a refill?CHANDLER: No, I'm alright, thanks.PHOEBE:OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a sec ond, I wanna get this just 反正你看到他们就会内疚跟紧张还不如趁机会跟他们刮点钱他说得很有道理什么东西亮亮的?那个？那个是...是…有点俗气啦不俗气不会…对道上兄弟来讲不会够帅的你一定撇了不少鲫吧?亲爱的这是什么?你以前的东西亲爱的，我们要给你一个惊喜你房间要改成健身房了的确是个惊喜只有个小问题为何不挑哥的房间?那我们也讨论过了……但你哥哥有那么多的科学奖杯，奖牌，还有优点勋章...我们不想去惊动它们老天也不准我们很遗憾你父母分开的消息他们只是分居谁知道呢，看看吧老实说，我们一点也不惊讶从我们认识他们开始他们就一直很不快乐特别是在夏威夷那件事之后哪件事啊?没什么啦…定是我想到别人去了或许是我你不是要叠衣服吗?快去吧，去叠呀还要再加一点吗?不用了，谢谢你得再给我一点时间我要学得逼真一点老兄啊，十一点方向有个惹火女郎在看着你学得很不错我想我可以去变性了我知道你在想什么汤达夫温蒂的创办人，对吧?我叫盖儿我真的必须走了很高兴认识你真是太好了他可以送我录影机或是一对高尔夫球杆也可以似看了碍眼，戴了碍事儿没那么惨啦对，你当然说得容易了你又不用走来走去炫耀怪头不要的东西right. [she sticks out her gut, clears her throat and sniffs her nose and then in her best male voice. . .] Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was really good, I think I'm ready for my penis now.CHANDLER:[walks over to the woman] I know what you're thinking, Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's.GAIL: I'm Gail.CHANDLER: Chandler. [waves his arm around, exposing the bracelet] GAIL: I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you. CHANDLER: What? [realizes it was the bracelet] Oh this is excellent. You know he coulda gotten me a VCR, he coulda gotten me a set of golf clubs, but no, he has to get me the woman repeller, the eyesore from the Liberace house of crap.PHOEBE: It's not that bad.CHANDLER:Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]PHOEBE: Chandler, Chandler.CHANDLER: I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity the fool that. . . [turns around and sees Joey] Hi. Hey man, we were just doin' some uhh, impressions over here. Do your Marcel Marceau. [Joey turns around and walks out without saying anything] That's actually good.[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha. PHOEBE: I think she's OK.ROSS: [Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder] Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks u p in the middle of their conversation] Excuse me, are you Rachel?RACHEL: What?ROSS: I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'?ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.MAN: Sure will. I've uh, gotta go. Take care.ROSS:OK, see ya later, nice meeting you. [man leaves] You're welcome. RACHEL: What?ROSS: I was saving you.RACHEL:Saving, saving, saving me from the pleasant conversation with the interesting man, saving me?ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.ROSS: But, you are. ”我可怜戴着首饰的笨蛋””我可怜戴着...”兄弟，我们正在玩…名人模仿秀呢表演你的马歇马叟模仿得很像呢你看看那个家伙他跟她已经说了多久废话了?滚开吧，兄弟她只是服务生，又不是艺妓我想她没有关系吧你看看…你看她把他推开，他还不滚我要采取行动了我们可以在山上……租个公寓滑进滑出，棒透了对不起，你是瑞秋吗?什么?我叫盖勒罗斯广告里说你很漂亮，但是…哇你…你在干嘛?老天，不是今天吗?我真不敢相信这件事如果成了的话将来跟孙子们就有话讲了对呀对了，我该走了保重了慢走，再见不客气我是在救你呀救我?让我不用跟有趣的男人愉快地交谈?从我坐的那边看起来…罗斯，你现在听我说我不是要你救的人但是你是呀什么?你是我的龙虾你知道吗?你又在装跟我盲目约会了不…你是…你是我的龙虾龙虾...…在水缸里，老的时候…它们会…它们爪牵爪散步在水缸里……爪子牵着爪子…菲此，帮我解释一下龙虾的事，好不好? 再表演一次爪子瑞秋，忘了龙虾的事吧我们...那我们呢？RACHEL: What?ROSS: Uh, uh, well you're, umm, you're my lobster.RACHEL: OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again?ROSS: No no, you're uh, you're my lobster. See um, lobsters, uhh, in the tank when, when they're old, uhh, they get with, uhh, they walk around holding the claws. In the tank, ya know, with, with the holding and. . . Uhh, Phoebs you wanna help me out with the, the whole lobster thing?PHOEBE: Do the claws again.ROSS: Rach. OK, forget, forget the lobsters OK. We're, let's talk, what about us?RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK.ROSS: No, but. . .RACHEL:No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.ROSS: Well, but, but. . .RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that. ROSS: E-except, except that what?RACHEL: No, no, ACC-cept that.ROSS: Oh.[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is there. Joey enters.]CHANDLER: Hey man, look it's my best bud. How ya doin? [Joey doesn't respond] Wow, you are really gettin' good at that Marcel Marceau thing. Hey, whaddya say uh, we play some ball, you and me, huh, whaddya say? [Throws a basketball to Joey. Joey doesn't move to catch it and the ball takes out a lamp] OK, that's my bad.JOEY: If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.CHANDLER:Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?JOEY: Well, what about the fact that you insulted the bracelet and you made fun of me?CHANDLER:OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]JOEY:You know what the. . . [sees Chandler on his knees, holding the couch cushions]CHANDLER: I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions as a symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you may haveth anger now. . . [Joey returns to his room] 罗斯，没有“我们”你听我说我爱上了你，然后我受伤了然后你爱上我结果我还是受伤了我受够了伤害根本就不值得但是...但没有”但是”了，罗斯我们是永远不可能的，接受吧除非什么呢?不...接受吧老兄，你看，我的好兄弟你怎么了?你这个马歇马叟真是模仿得越来越好了乔伊，我们去打球，怎么样?你跟我，你说怎么样啊?是我不好你要是那么讨厌那只手镯你应该直说就可以了我戴着这么讨厌的手镯……那不就证明了我有多么重视我们之间的友谊了吗?那你侮辱这只手镯还有你嘲笑我的那件事呢?所以说，我是个混蛋嘛不过我希望你不要往那个方向想，好吗? 你不要这样嘛我已经向你道过一百次歉了我保证以后手镯不离……手如果你要留在那里生气的话……那你就留在里面好了你知道吗?最…我向你下跪了……我举着这些沙发垫子……表示我对你的歉意还有悔恨跟古时候的人一样你现在虽然很生气…那葛拉芙的玻璃还不错啊说说而已嘛，就在电视土各位亲爱的我孙子呢?你没有带他来啊?不，他在…凯洛跟苏珊那儿我公司有一个女同性恋说说而已杰克，你看你觉得很好笑的油漆广告来了你到哪儿去了?人间炼狱[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Mr. and Mrs. Geller are watching tennis on TV, Monica is sitting at the table]MR. GELLER: You know, that Steffi Graf has quite a tush. I'm just saying, it's right there.ROSS: Hey guys.MRS. GELLER: Hi, darling. Where's my grandson, you didn't bring him? ROSS: No, he's at uh, Carol's and Susan's today.MR. GELLER: A woman in my office is a lesiban. I'm just saying. MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. [the Gellers return to watching TV and Ross goes over to Monica]MONICA: Where have you been?ROSS: Emotional hell. So, did they lend you the money yet? MONICA: No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet. ROSS: C'mon Monica, do it. Hey, you guys, um, Monica has some news. MONICA:Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it. MRS. GELLER: Why?MO NICA: Because they made me.MRS. GELLER: You were fired? What're you gonna do?MR. GELLER: Judy, Judy, relax, this is our little harmonica we're talking about. We taught her well. Ten percent of your paycheck, where does it go?MONICA and ROSS: In the bank.MR. GELLER: There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She's gonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. [pulls a quarter from behind her ear] MONICA: Anything larger back there?[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Phoebe enter.]CHANDLER: I can't believe it.PHOEBE: Would you stop already? Get out of the bitter barn and play in the hay.CHANDLER: Oh, you're right I, I should play in the hay. Forget about the fact that I just dropped 400 dollars to replace a bracelet that I hated to begin with. Bring on the hay. [sits down at the bar] RACHEL:[comes up from behind the bar and startles Chandler] Hey. I've got something that's gonna make you happy. Guess what Gunther found? [holds up Chandler's bracelet]PHOEBE: Hey now you have two. [Chandler looks annoyed] Oh, now you have two.CHANDLER: What am I gonna do, huh? [Joey walks in behind him] JOEY: Hey.CHANDLER: Hey.JOEY: How come you have two?CHANDLER: Well this one's for you.JOEY: Get out.CHANDLER: No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry, [puts 他们有没有借你钱?没有，我还没有开口去呀，摩妮卡，说呀爸，妈摩妮卡有事要找你们抱歉我以前没有告诉你们……我现在…并没有在工作因为我必须离职为什么?公司的决定你被炒鱿鱼那你现在怎么办呢?芙蒂，放心啦这可是我们的小妮妮宝贝儿我们教导有方薪水的百分之十上哪儿去了?存银行了就是嘛，所以她在吃她的老本存钱本来就是应急的她不会有事的如果那些钱还不够用的话…你知道哪里有钱呀…有大张一点的吗?我真不敢相信你停一下，好不好?不要再怨天尤人了，高兴一点你说得对，我应该高兴一点的忘了我刚才白花花的四百大洋去买一个我恨的手镯这件事逗我开心啊嘿我这儿有个包你大乐的东西猜根特刚找到什么了?你现在有两个了我该如何是好?你怎么有两个?这个是送你的少来了我没办法我知道这对你的意义重大……我也知道不只是首饰而已这是关于你跟我还有我们是”好兄弟”这叫友谊吗?我觉得应该是我们是手镯兄弟大家都会这样叫我们的好了，拿去吧随你什么时候还都可以你用恐龙支票?对啊，你不但得到钱还可以学到一点东西这有什么不对的?没什么…你是小器龙bracelet on Joey] it's about you and me and the fact that we're [reading bracelet] best buds.JOEY:Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.CHANDLER: That's what they'll call us.[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Ross are standing in the kitchen. Ross is filling out a check]ROSS: Here you go, you can pay me back whenever you like. MONICA: You have dinosaur checks?ROSS: Yeah, yeah I mean, you get your money and you learn a little something, what's wrong with that?MONICA:Nothin', nothin', hey you're a cheapasaurus. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, thank you, I'm very greatful.PHOEBE: [Standing in living room with Chandler and Joey. She pulls a huge bathing suit out of a box] Hey, Mon, what is this? MONICA: Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from high school. I was uh, a little bigger then.CHANDLER: Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.JOEY: [pulls out a VCR tape] Hey Monica, what's on this video tape? MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.ROSS: [Rac hel enters] Oh.RACHEL: Hi.ROSS: Hi.MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]RACHEL: Oh my God.JOEY: What is with your nose?RACHEL: They had to reduce it because of, of my deviated septum. CHANDLER:OK, I was wrong, that's what they used to cover Connecticut. MONICA:You know what this is, this is us getting ready for the prom. RACHEL: Oh.ROSS: You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.ALL: Oh yeah we do. C'mon.MRS. GELLER: Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.MONICA: Over here dad. [he pans over and we see a torso taking up the whole screen]MR, GELLER: Wait, how do you zoom out? [zooms out and we see an extremely overweight Monica eating a big sandwich] There she is. JOEY: Some girl ate Monica.MONICA: Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.CHANDLER: Ahh, so how many cameras are actually on you? MONICA: Oh, you look so great.RACHEL: Ahh, so do you, beautiful. [they hug]MONICA: Oops.RACHEL: What?MONICA: Shoot, I think I got mayonaise on you. 开玩笑…谢谢，我很感激你摩妮卡，这是什么东西啊?我高中时代的泳衣啊那个时候比较胖我还以为是康乃狄克州雨天用的遮雨棚呢摩妮卡，这带子里有什么?不知道，问倒我了放来看看这边，杰克瑞秋穿着粉蓝色出来了好漂亮，是不是?过来拍她过来拍她你鼻子怎么回事啊?我隔膜长歪了不得已，只好去缩鼻了我错了那才是康乃狄克州的遮雨棚呢知道这是什么吗?毕业舞会前的准备各位，我们不用看这个我们要看…当然要看看嘛，很好玩的你有没有拍摩妮卡?摩妮卡在哪儿?这里啊，老爸等一等，镜头怎么伸缩?拍到了那个女的吃了摩妮卡闭嘴啦，上镜头会多十磅的那到底有几个镜头在拍你?你好漂亮哦你也是好美啊糟了，怎么了？我想我的美乃滋沾到你了没关系啦只是肩膀，没弄到衣服啊你们笑一笑爸，关掉啦关了爸，你没关，那红灯亮着那表示关了罗斯很帅嘛你今天晚上很漂亮谢谢你今年夏天要做什么?你知道的，只是……在家里待着玩我的音乐我钩子没钩吗?袖子一直掉下来，没办法固定我看看，不知道今年夏天你要做…他们来了…什么?RACHEL: Oh, that's OK, it's just the shoulder, it's not my dress. MR. GELLER: Everybody smile.MONICA: Oh, dad, turn it off.MR. GELLER: It is off.MONICA: Dad, it is not. What's with the red light?MR. GELLER: It's the off light. Right Ross? [pans over to see Ross with an afro and moustache]JOEY: Lookin' good Mr. Cotter.ROSS: You look pretty tonight.RACHEL: Oh, thanks. So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer? ROSS: Oh, you know, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna hang out, work on my music.RACHEL: [the shoulders of her dress keep falling off her shoulders] Is my hook unhooked? These things keep falling down, I can't. . . ROSS: Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . [doorbell rings]RACHEL: Oh, the guys are here.ROSS: this summer?CHANDLER: Work on your music?[Ross is sitting on the stairs with a laptop keyboard playing 'Axel-F'] RACHEL: Oh my God, look there's Roy Gublik.MONICA:Ya know, Roy saw Star Wars 317 times. His name was in the paper. RACHEL: Where's Chip, why isn't he here yet?ROY: He'll be here OK, take a chill pill. [Chip pins Monica's corsage on, Monica then turns and whispers to Rachel]MONICA: I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either. ROY: Oh, I'm gonna kick Chip's ass.MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.ROSS: Doubtful.MRS. GELLER: Jack, give me that. Talk to your son.MR. GELLER: Your mother's right. Take her, you can wear my tux. ROSS: Dad, she won't want to go with me.MR. GELLER: Of course she would, you're a college man.ROSS: I don't know.MR. GELLER: Well, c'mon. Don't ya want to find out?RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.ROSS: OK. Hold my board.MR. GELLER: Atta boy. [Ross scrambles upstairs to change]ROSS: OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.ALL: No, no, no.ROSS: OK, fine, well I'm not gonna watch, alright.MR. GELLER: C'mon kid, let's go. 玩你的音乐?天啊，你们看，是古洛伊耶洛伊看”昨际大战”看了317次他的名字还上了报奇普呢?他为什么还没来?他会来的，放心吧好了我刚告诉瑞秋洛伊摸我的咪咪没男伴我去不成毕业舞会来不及了你不去，我也不要去了我要奇普好看我有个很棒的主意你可以陪瑞秋去参加舞会啊我很怀疑杰克，那个给我你跟儿子去谈一谈这玩意儿好重你妈说得对，带她去穿我的礼服爸，她不会想跟我去的她当然会，你是大学生呀我不知道你不想弄清楚吗?真不敢相信我去不成自己的毕业舞会这太残酷了好，你帮我拿着真有你的…好了，各位，我想我们看够了我们把它关掉吧那好吧，我就不看来吧，孩子，我们走了天啊，你真帅，去给他们看看等一下，爸要酷...好了，老爸瑞秋，准备好你的白马王子来了糟了别等我们回来了走了，奇普，快天啊哪一个?怎么按啊?杰克，这个怎么关啊?按按钮哪个钮？那个拉...真不敢相信你那么做了是呀…瞧，他是她的龙虾跟他跳妈，我饿了跟你爸跳我或许不会跳什么闪舞啦不过我也绝不MRS. GELLER: Ahh, are you hadsome.MR. GELLER: Let's show 'em.ROSS: Uh, just a sec dad. [to himself] OK, be cool, just be cool. [walks down the stairs and grabs the flowers out of the vase on the endtable] OK dad.MR. GELLER: [going downstairs] Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving]RACHEL, MONICA, ROY, and CHIP: Bye.MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?MR. GELLER: Press the button.MRS. GELLER: Which one? Which button, Jack.MR. GELLER: The button, the button.MONICA: I can't believe you did that.ROSS: Yeah, well.[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]PHOEBE: See, he's her lobster.CLOSING CREDITS[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is watching the rest of the tape]MRS. GELLER: Dance with him.MONICA: Mom, I'm hungry.MRS. GELLER: Dance with your father.MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.MONICA: Alright.[the tape cuts to Monica's parents under the covers]MRS. GELLER: Oh, Jack.MR. GELLER: Oh, Judy. Oh, Judy.BOTH: Oh, ohhhhh.[Monica is visibly upset]END 是个省油的灯好吧克蒂。

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本213 The One After the Superbowl part 2素材

213 The One After the Superbowl part 2[Scene: Central Perk. The whole gang is there.]ROSS: Well, I tracked down Marcel and get this, he's healthy, he's happy, and he's right here in New York filming Outbreak II - The Virus Takes Manhattan.RACHEL: You're kidding.JOEY: This is amazing.ROSS: I know.JOEY: I finally get a part on TV and the monkey's makin' movies. PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, I'm ready.RACHEL: OK.[little kid enters]KID:Excuse me. Is this where the singing lady is that tells the truth? PHOEBE: Um, yeah I guess that's me.KID: [shouting out the door] She's here.[a rush of kids enter]PHOEBE: [singing] Sometimes men love women,sometimes men love men,and then there are bisexuals,though some just say they're kidding la-la-la la-la-la-la-la-la-la...[Scene: City street. The whole gang is walking up to the movie set.] ROSS:This is so exciting, I haven't seen my monkey in almost a year. CHANDLER:What, you never look down in the shower? Oh please. I'm not allowed to make one joke in the monkey-is-penis genre?SECURITY GUARD: C'mon people, back up please, b ack up, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon.ROSS: Uh, excuse me, uh, where can we find the monkey?SECURITY GUARD: I'm sorry guys, closed set.ROSS: Uh, I'm sorry, you don't understand, I'm, I'm, I'm a friend of his. We uh, we used to live together.SECURITY GUARD: Yeah, and I have a time share in the Pocanos with Flipper.MONICA: Ross, there he is.ROSS: Hey, hey buddy, Marcel. Marcel. [Marcel doesn't react so Ross starts singing] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [no reaction from Marcel, Monica and Joey urge him on] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [Marcel looks over and everyone joins in] a-weema-way, a-weema-way..... [Marcel runs over and hops up on Ross's shoulder][Scene: The next time at the movie set.]SECURITY GUARD: Uh, excuse me folks this is a uhh...JOEY: Closed set. We know but we're friends with the monkey. [guard lets them in]ROSS:Good morning. Hey pal, look who I brought. It's your old friend Harry Elefante. [Marcel grabs the elephant doll and throws it to the 213 超级杯后（第二集）前情提要…我追查马赛追查到这个：它正在纽约拍”危机总动员病毒肆虐曼哈顿”兄弟，马赛…抱歉，各位，这片场…不对外，我们知道我们是猴子的朋友早安伙计，你看我带谁来了是你的老朋友耶，毛毛芳真惨!我不懂它昨天好像很高兴看到我放在心上，它近来压力很大你知道，主演一部电影马赛现在到底有多大牌呀?用人来此啊，我说像……西碧雪佛你们是有份演出的还是你们小题大作而已?沙尔?杰利想知道猴子可以上地铁那一幕了吗? 抱歉杰利是导演吗?他是哪一个?就是坐在导演椅子那个我懂了菲此，我们走我干嘛要跟你走?我们只是要走过来这里远离那些……嗜血肉的可怕病毒看在老天的份上，听我说他有没有在看?有没有在看?我有个难题我没有办法帮克丽化妆她拒绝承认她的嘴巴上有胡子很多吗?像道眉毛掉到嘴上似的除非有人说服她让我帮她漂白……不然尚克劳范达美就得去跟大胡子亲热了我去跟她谈谈我讨厌演员老兄，伪装得不错我刚才差点没看到你抱歉你叫钱德吗?对，没错钱德宾ground]JOEY: Woah, dude, burn.ROSS: I don't get it, he seemed so happy to see me yesterday. TRAINER: Hey don't take it personal, he's under a lot of pressure, ya know, starring in a movie and all.RACHEL: Now just how big of a star is Marcel?TRAINER: In human terms, I'd say Cybill Shepard.ALL: Woah.CHANDLER: [to guys wering yellow isolation suits] So, are you guys in the movie, or are you just really paranoid.DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: Hey Sal, Jerry wants to know if the monkey's ready for the subway set?JOEY: Uh, excuse me. Jerry is the director, which one's he? DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: The one in the director's chair.JOEY: Gotcha. Phoebs, walk with me.PHOEBE: OK. Um, how come I'm walking with you?JOEY:Well, we're, we're just goin' over here so that we can get away from the horrible flesh eating virus, for the love of God woman, listen to me. Is he lookin', is he lookin'?SUSIE: We've got a problem.DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: Tell me.SUSIE: I can't do Chris's makeup. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a moustasche.DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: Is it bad?SUSIE: It looks like one of her eyebrows fell down. Now unless someone convinces her to let me bleach it, Jean-Claude Van Damme is gonna be making out with Gabe Kaplan.DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: I'll talk to her.SUSIE: I hate actors.CHANDLER:[to an extra in fatigues] Nice camoflauge man, for a minute there I almost didn't see ya.SUSIE: Excuse me.CHANDLER: Ahhhh.SUSIE: Uh, is your name Chandler?CHANDLER: Uh, yes, yes it is.SUSIE: Chandler Bing?CHANDLER: Do you know me or are you just really good at this game? SUSIE: I'm Susie Moss. Fourth grade, glasses, I used to carry around a box of animal crackers like a purse.CHANDLER:Susie Moss, right, yeah, wow, you look. . . great job growing up.SUSIE: It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the little mirrors on it.CHANDLER:Oh, right, well yeah, I graduated fourth grade and realized I wasn't a pimp.SUSIE: Remember the class play? You, you pulled up my skirt and the entire auditorium saw my underpants.CHANDLER: Yes, back then I, uh, used humor as a defense mechanism. 你认识我?还是你很会钓男人?我是莫苏西四年级呀，戴眼镜我常常像拿手提包一样拿一包动物饼干莫苏西对呀，是呀你真是…女大十八岁很高兴看到你不再戴那顶缀满小镜子的牛仔帽升上五年级之后我发现我不是个拉皮条的记得班上的话剧吗?你掀我的裙子全礼堂的人都看到我的内裤了对，那个时候我用我的幽默感来保护自己谢天谢地，我现在不用那样了天啊。

Friends 老友记【202】The One With the Breast Milk

T h e O n e W i t h t h e B r e a s t M i l k202母乳卡萝给本喂奶，乔伊和钱德赶紧回避。

菲比为确认奶水的温度，尝了尝奶瓶里的母乳，罗斯反应强烈，成人怎么可以喝人奶呢？朱丽邀人购物，菲比怕得罪瑞秋，借故推脱，莫妮卡为表示友善答应同去；虽然偷偷摸摸，但却欲盖弥彰，瑞秋最终发现真相，感觉自己被背叛。

两人的争吵听来仿佛莫妮卡有了“外遇”。

乔伊到百货公司打工，为路过的顾客试喷古龙水，但他的地位受到一个魁梧的新人的威胁。

为了莫妮卡，瑞秋试图对朱丽友好一点，但她就是做不到。

2.02T h e O n e W i t h t h e B r e a s t M i l kC a r o l b r e a s t f e e d s B e n,c a u s i n g J o e y a n d C h a n d l e r d i s c o m f o r t.H o w e v e r,e v e n s t r o n g e r r e a c t i o n s o c c u r w h e n R o s s i s t a k i n g c a r e o f B e n a n d P h o e b e c h e c k s t h e t e m p e r a t u r e o f t h e b o t t l e d b r e a s t m i l k b y t a s t i n g i t.J u l i e i n v i t e s M o n i c a t o g o s h o p p i n g;R a c h e l f i n d s o u t a n d f e e l s b e t r a y e d.J o e y's s t a t u s a s t h e B i j a n C o l o g n e M a n i s t h r e a t e n e d w h e n h i s d e p a r t m e n t s t o r e h i r e s s o m e o n e t o b e t h e H o m b r e M a n.R a c h e l t r i e s t o b e n i c e r t o J u l i e,b u t i s l e s s t h a n s i n c e r e.[S c e n e:M o n i c a a n d R a c h e l's,C a r o l a n d S u s a n a r e s h o w i n g o f f B e n t o t h e g a n g.]M o n i c a：(e n t e r i n g f r o m h e r b e d r o o m c a r r y i n g a p r e s e n t)O k,t h e s e w e r e u n b e l i e v a b l y e x p e n s i v e,a n d I k n o w h e's g o n n a g r o w o u t o f t h e m i n l i k e 20m i n u t e s,b u t I c o u l d n't r e s i s t.(T h e r e a l i t t l e p a i r o f N i k e s h o e s.)g r o w o u t o f v.渐渐穿不下/N i k e,I n c.(N Y S E:N K E)i s a m a j o r p u b l i c l y t r a d e d s p o r t s w e a r a n d e q u i p m e n t s u p p l i e r b a s e d i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s.T h e c o m p a n y i s h e a d q u a r t e r e d i nB e a v e r t o n,n e a r t h e P o r t l a n d m e t r o p o l i t a n a r e a o f O r e g o n.I t i s t h e w o r l d's l e a d i n g s u p p l i e r o f a t h l e t i c s h o e s a n d a p p a r e l a n d a m a j o r m a n u f a c t u r e r o f s p o r t s e q u i p m e n t w i t h r e v e n u e i n e x c e s s o f$18.6b i l l i o n U S D i n i t s f i s c a l y e a r2008(e n d i n g M a y31,2008).A s o f2008,i t e m p l o y e d m o r e t h a n30,000p e o p l e w o r l d w i d e.N i k e a n d P r e c i s i o n C a s t p a r t s a r e t h e o n l y F o r t u n e500c o m p a n i e s h e a d q u a r t e r e d i n t h e s t a t e o f O r e g o n,a c c o r d i n g t o T h e O r e g o n i a n.T h e c o m p a n y w a s f o u n d e d o n J a n u a r y25,1964a sB l u e R i b b o n S p o r t s b y B i l l B o w e r m a n a n d P h i l i p K n i g h t,a n d o f f i c i a l l y b e c a m e N i k e,I n c.i n1978.T h e c o m p a n y t a k e s i t s n a m e f r o m N i k e,t h e G r e e k g o d d e s s o f v i c t o r y.N i k e m a r k e t s i t s p r o d u c t s u n d e r i t s o w n b r a n d a s w e l l a s N i k e G o l f,N i k e P r o,N i k e+,A i r J o r d a n,N i k e S k a t e b o a r d i n g a n d s u b s i d i a r i e s i n c l u d i n gC o l e H a a n,H u r l e y I n t e r n a t i o n a l,U m b r o a n d C o n v e r s e.N i k e a l s o o w n e d B a u e r H o c k e y(l a t e r r e n a m e d N i k e B a u e r)b e t w e e n1995a n d2008.I n a d d i t i o n t o m a n u f a c t u r i n g s p o r t s w e a r a n d e q u i p m e n t,t h e c o m p a n y o p e r a t e s r e t a i l s t o r e s u n d e r t h e N i k e t o w n n a m e.N i k e s p o n s o r s m a n y h i g h p r o f i l e a t h l e t e s a n d s p o r t s t e a m s a r o u n d t h e w o r l d, w i t h t h e h i g h l y r e c o g n i z e d t r a d e m a r k s o f"J u s t d o i t"a n d t h e S w o o s h l o g o.P h o e b e：O h,l o o k a t t h e s e!H e y,B e n.J u s t d o i t.(B e n s t a r t s t o c r y)O h m y g o d,w a s t h a t t o o m u c h p r e s s u r e f o r h i m?S u s a n:O h,i s h e h u n g r y a l r e a d y?C a r o l:I g u e s s s o.(C a r o l s t a r t s t o b r e a s t-f e e d B e n.)b r e a s t-f e e d v.喂奶C h a n d l e r：Y o u k n o w,i t's...(s e e s t h e f e e d i n g t a k i n g p l a c e n e x t t o h i m) s o m e t h i n g f u n n y a b o u t s n e a k e r s.I'l l b e r i g h t b a c k.(G o e s i n t o t h ek i t c h e n)s n e a k e r n.运动鞋J o e y：(j o i n s h i m)I g o t t a g e t o n e,t o o.R o s s：(f o l l o w i n g t h e m i n t o t h e k i t c h e n)W h a t a r e y o u g u y s d o i n g?C h a n d l e r：W e'r e j u s t h a n g i n g o u t b y t h e s p o o n s.L a d l e?l a d l e n.长柄杓R o s s：L o o k,w o u l d y o u g u y s g r o w u p?T h a t i s t h e m o s t n a t u r a l b e a u t i f u l t h i n g i n t h e w o r l d.J o e y：Y e a h,w e k n o w,b u t t h e r e's a b a b y s u c k i n'o n i t.R o s s：T h i s i s m y s o n h a v i n g l u n c h,o k?I t's g o n n a h a p p e n a l o t,s o y o u'd b e t t e r g e t u s e d t o i t.N o w i f y o u h a v e a n y p r o b l e m w i t h i t,i f y o u'r e u n c o m f o r t a b l e,j u s t a s k q u e s t i o n s.C a r o l's f i n e w i t h i t,n o w c o m e o n.(T h e y g o b a c k i n t o t h e l i v i n g r o o m)C h a n d l e r：C a r o l,C a r o l?I w a s j u s t w o n d e r i n g i f J o e y c o u l d a s k y o u a q u e s t i o n a b o u t b r e a s t-f e e d i n g?C a r o l:S u r e.J o e y：D o e s i t h u r t?C a r o l:I t d i d a t f i r s t,b u t n o t a n y m o r e.J o e y：C h a n d l e r?C h a n d l e r：S o h o w o f t e n c a n y o u d o i t?C a r o l:A s m u c h a s h e n e e d s.J o e y：O k,I g o t o n e,I g o t o n e.I f h e b l o w s i n t o o n e,d o e s t h e o t h e r o n e g e t b i g g e r?O P E N I N G C R E D I T S[S c e n e:C e n t r a l P e r k,t h e g a n g i s a l l t h e r e.]J u l i e：R a c h e l,d o y o u h a v e a n y m u f f i n s l e f t?m u f f i n n.松饼R a c h e l：Y e a h,I f o r g e t w h i c h o n e.J u l i e：O h,y o u'r e b u s y,t h a t's o k,I'l l g e t i t.A n y b o d y e l s e w a n t o n e?A l l:N o t h a n k s.J u l i e：O h,y o u'r e l o s i n'y o u r a p r o n h e r e,l e t m e g e t i t.T h e r e y o u g o. (T i e s i t b a c k u p f o r h e r)a p r o n n.围裙R a c h e l：(t o J u l i e)T h a n k y o u.(u n d e r h e r b r e a t h t o C h a n d l e r)W h a t a b i t c h.u n d e r o n e's b r e a t h a d v.低声地J u l i e：O h,l i s t e n y o u g u y s.I h a v e t h i s f r i e n d a t B l o o m i n g d a l e s w h o's q u i t t i n g t o m o r r o w a n d h e w a n t s t o a b u s e h i s d i s c o u n t.S o,a n y o n e w a n t s t o c o m e w i t h m e a n d t a k e a d v a n t a g e o f i t?a b u s e v.滥用/B l o o m i n g d a l e's(o r B l o o m i e's)i s a c h a i n o f u p s c a l e A m e r i c a n d e p a r t m e n t s t o r e s o w n e d b y M a c y's,I n c.,w h i c h i s a l s o t h e p a r e n t c o m p a n y o f M a c y's.B l o o m i n g d a l e's h a s36s t o r e s n a t i o n w i d e,w i t h a n n u a l s a l e s o f$1.9b i l l i o n.I t i s a t a s l i g h t l y h i g h e r p r i c e l e v e l t h a n t h e f o r m e r P a r i s i a n,a n d s l i g h t l y b e l o w t h a t o f L o r d&T a y l o r,S a k s F i f t h A v e n u e,N e i m a n M a r c u s,B e r g d o r f G o o d m a n a n d B a r n e y s N e w Y o r k.P h o e b e：I c a n't,I h a v e t o t a k e m y g r a n d m o t h e r t o t h e v e t.v e t n.兽医M o n i c a：O k,I'l l g o w i t h y o u.J u l i e：G r e a t.R o s s：(e n t e r s)H i,h o n e y.C h a n d l e r：H e y,s w e e t u m s.s w e e t u m s<俚>a w o r d m e a n i n g"t h e a w e s o m e s t p e r s o n e v e r,w h o m I l o v e"[e g:I l o v e t a l k i n g t o m y s w e e t u m s.h e r o c k s m y f a c e o f f]R o s s：H e l l o t o t h e r e s t.A l l:H i!J o e y：M o n i c a w h a t'r e y o u d o i n'?Y o u c a n't g o s h o p p i n g w i t h h e r?W h a t a b o u t R a c h e l?M o n i c a：I t's g o n n a b e a p r o b l e m,i s n't i t?C h a n d l e r：C o m e o n,y o u'r e g o i n g t o B l o o m i n g d a l e s w i t h J u l i e?T h a t's l i k e c h e a t i n g o n R a c h e l i n h e r h o u s e o f w o r s h i p.c h e a t o n v.对……不忠/w o r s h i p n.崇拜礼拜M o n i c a：B u t I'm...P h o e b e：M o n i c a,s h e w i l l k i l l y o u.S h e w i l l k i l l y o u l i k e a d o g i n t h e s t r e e t.R o s s：S o J u l e s t e l l s m e y o u g u y s a r e g o i n g s h o p p i n g t o m o r r o w?M o n i c a：Y e a h,i t's a c t u a l l y n o t t h a t b i g a d e a l.R o s s：I t's a b i g d e a l t o m e.T h i s i s g r e a t,M o n i c a.I r e a l l y a p p r e c i a t e t h i s.M o n i c a：Y o u'r e w e l c o m e.P h o e b e：W o o f,w o o f.(h a e m a t e m e s i s)h a e m a t e m e s i s n.吐血[S c e n e:A D e p a r t m e n t S t o r e,J o e y i s s e l l i n g m e n's c o l o g n e.]c o l o g n e n.古龙香水J o e y：B i j a n f o r m e n?B i j a n f o r m e n?B i j a n f o r m e n?H e y A n n a b e l l e.B i j a n(比詹)高端品牌香水于1987年出自贝弗利山的著名男装设计师B i j a n之手。

高中英语《Frinds老友记》第2季中英文对照完整剧本207 The One Where Ross Finds Out素材

207 The One Where Ross Finds Out[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is sitting at the couches, Chandler enters.]CHAN: OK, what is it about me? Do I not look fun enough? Is there something. . . repellant. . . about me?RACH: So, how was the party?CHAN: Well it couldn't have been worse. A woman literally passed through me. OK, so what is it, am I hideously unattractive? PHOE: No, you are not, you are very attractive. You know what, I go through the exact same thing. Every time I put on a little weight, I start questioning everyting.CHAN: Woah, woah, I've put on a little weight?PHOE: No, not wieght... y'know, more like insulation.MNCA:Chandler, I'm unemployed and in dire need of a project. Ya wanna work out? I can remake you.CHAN:Oh, you know, I would, but that might get in the way of my lying around time.MNCA: Please.ALL: C'mon. Let her. Yeah.CHAN:Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours, I'm goin' home.PHOE: Your boobs are fine. Look, I never should have said anything. Come here. Come here. [hugs Chandler but holds her hands apart behind his back] Oh, can't make.... hands... meet....OPENING TITLES[Scene: Hallway between the apartments. Chandler comes out wearing spandex, jogging in place. Monica is there.]CHAN: OK, let's do it. [Monica looks at him funny] What?MNCA: Nothing, just never seen you in little stretchy pants before. CHAN: And we're changing. [jogs back in his apartment][Cut to the city street. Monica and Chandler are jogging. Chandler is lagging behind so he hops in a cab and takes off, leaving Monica behind][Scene: Back in Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is doing situps.]MNCA: C'mon give me five more. Five more.CHAN: [weakly] No.MNCA: Five more and I'll flash you.CHAN: One. . . two. . . two and a half. OK, just show me one of them. [Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch. Rachel is working.]CHAN: [slowly lifts coffee cup to his mouth] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [slowly sets the cup back down] Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. [Joey intercepts the cup and puts it down for him]. She's insane, the woman is insane. It's before work, it's after work, it's during work. She's got me doing 207 罗斯发现瑞秋对他有意思我是哪里不对?我看起来不够有趣吗?我是有哪里讨人厌吗?派对好玩吗?难玩死了有个女人对我大送秋波我有那么不讨人喜欢吗?不，才怪我也是一样每当我增加了一点点重量我就开始质疑一切了你说我变胖了?你要…?不是，不是重量说绝缘体比较恰当钱德，我正在失业迫切需要做点事情你要不要运动?我可以重塑你我很想，但那或许会妨碍我那些无所事事的时间拜托啦对啦，让她做一下嘛但我穿上紧身衣后，胸部比你大的话，我就不来了好，开始吧怎么了?没什么只是没看过你穿紧身裤而已呀我去换衣服加油，再做五个再五个做就给你看波波做就给你看波波…二点五好了，给我看一边吧中央公园她疯了那个女人疯了上班前，上班后，上班哮她叫我在公司做收臀运动现在，他们不再送邮件给我了菲菲，你昨晚跟史考怎么样?不错呀带他去一家浪漫的餐厅……点了香槟，很好那个家伙还是不行动啊?不，零蛋，没有真遗憾，菲菲我不在乎慢慢的来我很喜欢他他这个人很有趣，人也很甜butt clenches at my desk. And now, they won't bring me my mail anymore. [Phoebe enters.]RACH: Hey Phoebs, how'd it go with Scott last night?PHOE: Oh, um, it was nice. Took him to a romantic restraunt, ordered champagne, nice.JOEY: The guy still won't put out, huh?PHOE: Nope. Zilch, nothin', uh-uh.ALL: Sorry Phoebs.PHOE: Look, I, y'know, I don't mind taking it slow, I like him a lot, y'know he's really interesting and he's really sweet and why won't he give it up?JOEY: Maybe he, uhh... drives his car on the other side of the road, if ya know what I mean.PHOE: No, whad'ya mean? He's not British.JOEY: Maybe he's. . . gay.PHOE:Oohh, um, no, I don't think that's the problem. 'Cause we went, um, dancing the other night and the way he held me so close, and the way he was looking into my eyes I just like... definitely fel t something.RACH: Yeah, but how much can you tell from a look?PHOE: No, I felt it on my hip. You could tell.[Monica enters.]MNCA: [to Chandler] Yo, Bing. Racquetball in 15 minutes.CHAN: Joey, be a pal. Lift up my hand and smack her with it. PHOE:[seeing Ross kissing Julie outside the window] Ooh, oh, Rachel, don't look.RACH:What? [looks, feigns indifference] C'mon you guys, I don't care, I have a date tonight.JOEY: Woah, woah, woah, you have a date?RACH: Yeah, Monica's settin' me up.JOEY: But uh, uh, what about uh, Ross and uh. . .?RACH: Oh what, my whole insane jealousy thing? Well, y'know, as much fun as that was, I've decided to opt for sanity.CHAN: So you really OK about all this?RACH:Oh yeah, c'mon, I'm movin' on. He can press her up against that window as much as he wants. For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing.[Ross and Julie enter.]ROSS: Hi guys.ALL: Hey.ROSS: Oh, Monica, I figured I'd come by tomorrow morning and pick up Fluffy's old cat toy, OK?MNCA: Only if you say his full name.ROSS:[reluctantly] Can I come over tomorrow and pick up Fluffy Meowington's cat toy.MNCA: Alright.JOEY: [to Ross] You're getting a cat?ROSS: Uh, actually, we're getting a cat. 他干嘛那么矜持呢?或许他跟我们反方向开车你懂我的意思吧?不懂，他又不是英国人他或许是同性恋不，我觉得问题不在那儿因为我们前几天去跳舞…他紧紧抱住我的那个样子还有他凝视我眼睛的样子…我觉得他对我绝对有意思是啊，从眼神能看出多少呢?不，我是从屁股感觉到的钱兄弟，二十分钟后打壁球乔伊，好兄弟举起我的手赏她一巴掌瑞秋，你别看什么?我今晚有约会你有约会?对呀，摩妮卡介绍的那罗斯跟…我打翻醋坛子那码子事啊?虽然那还挺有趣的……我决定不再疯下去了你真的不介意那些了?少来了，我还要过我的日子呢他爱怎么把她压在那扇窗子上就怎么压吧干脆把她摔过窗子算了各位摩妮卡，我想明天早上过来拿膨膨以前的猫玩具不讲全名就不给喔好吧，那我明天可不可以过来拿喵喵膨膨的猫玩具?没问题你要养猫啊?事实上，是我们要养猫起养?你们两个?一起?我们想它会一半时间跟罗斯住一半跟我住那是不是很棒呢那是不是很棒呢…可以疼爱非常非常久的东西希望如此我得走了我有约会跟个男人喔祝各位今晚顺利……而你们两个得到一只好猫RACH: Together?ROSS: Uh huh.RACH: Both of you?ROSS: Yep.RACH: Together.JULIE: Yeah, we figure it'll live with Ross half the time, and with me half the time.RACH: Ohh, well, isn't that just lovely. That's something the two of you will be able to enjoy for a really, really, really, really, really long time.ROSS: Hopefully.RACH: Well. [looks at watch] Woah, look at that! I gotta go, I gotta date. With a man. Um, OK, you guys have a really, uh, have a really good night and you two have a, uh, have a, uh, really good cat. [she leaves carrying her tray then comes back in] OK, we're not supposed to take these when we leave.[Scene:A nice restraunt. Rachel is on her date with Michael (MICH).] MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am. RACH: [distracted] How long do cats live?MICH: [confused] I'm sorry?RACH:Cats, how long do they live figuring you don't... y'know, throw 'em under a bus or something?MICH: Um, maybe 15, 16 years.RACH:That's just great. [she picks up her champagne and starts drinking]MICH: Um, cheers.RACH: Oh, right, clink. [downs her glass]MICH: Monica told you I was cuter that this, didn't she?RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.MICH: Oh, that does sound. . .Ahh.RACH: I mean he just started going out with her.MICH: Is this guy, uhh, an old boyfriend?RACH:Ah, hah-hah-hah-ho, yeah, he wishes. Oh, I'm sorry, look at me. OK, Michael, let's talk about you.MICH: Alright.RACH: OK, OK. So, you ever get a pet with a girlfriend?[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.] PHOE: So, I figured it out.JOEY: What?PHOE: Why Scott doesn't want to sleep with me. It's 'cause I'm not sexy enough.JOEY:Phoebe, that's crazy. When I first met you, you know what I said to Chandler? I said, "Excellent butt, great rack."PHOE: Really? That's so sweet. I mean, I'm officially offended but, sweet. 顺手牵羊是不对的我不晓得摩妮卡有没有告诉你这是我离婚之后的第一次约会我显得有一点紧张…猫能活多久啊?你说什么?猫，猫能活多久?如果不把它们丢到巴士下面去送死的话大概是十五，六年吧那真是太棒了干杯好，干杯摩妮卡把我吹得此本人可爱对不对?不是因为你…我是…我另外有心事事情说不定没那么糟啦……我有一个朋友他跟他的女朋友要养猫听起来的确是…他们两个才刚刚开始交往不久他是你以前的男朋友吗?他想得美喔对不起，你瞧瞧我好了，麦克，谈谈你吧以前你跟女朋友—起养过宠物吗?我知道为什么了什么?史考为什么不想跟我上床因为我不够性感菲此，别傻了第一次看到你之后你知道我对钱德说什么吗?我说”前突后翘，有看头”真的?嘴好甜说实在的，我被冒犯了可是感觉真好菲菲，你想知道为什么的话你必须开口去问他你说得对…你真棒耶他们干嘛不养只昆虫养只果蝇就好了那种只活一，两天的东西它们叫什么?果蝇?谢谢要不要点甜点啊?不，不要了我想结账你玩得不开心?不…我很开心不过刚才那一个半小时我都在回忆”餐JOEY: Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to ask him.PHOE: You're right, you're right. Ah, you are so yumm. [they hug] [Outside the window, Monica and Chandler jog up. Monica playfully pushes him. They start puching and slapping harder and harder until Monica pushes him down. Chandler stands up, with a serious expression, and chases her away.][Scene:Back in the restraunt. Rachel pours the last of the champange bottle in her glass.]RACH: [obviously drunk] I mean, it's a cat, y'know, it's a cat. Why can't they get one of those bugs, y'know, one of those fruitflies, those things that live for like a day or something? [belligerently] What're they called, what're they called, what're they called? MICH: Fruitflies?RACH: Yes! Thank you.[The waiter comes to the table.]WAITER: So, would you like any dessert?MICH: No! No dessert, just a check, please.RACH: Oh, you're not having fun, are you?MICH: No, no, I am, but only because for the last hour and a half I've been playing the movie Diner in my head.RACH:Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think a bout is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, why can't I do that?MICH: Oy. Look, I've been through a divorce, trust me you're gonna be fine. You just can't see it now because you haven't had any closure. RACH:Yeah! Closure. That's what it is, that's what I need. God, you're brilliant! Why didn't I think of that? How do I get that?MICH: Well, you know, there's no one way really, it's just, you know, whatever it takes so that you can finally say to him, "I'm over you." RACH: Closure, that's what it is. Closure. [she looks around the restaurant, spotting a guy with a cellular phone] Hello, excuse me. Excuse me, hel. . . woo [she almost falls out of her chair] GUY: Hang on.RACH: Hello, excuse me.GUY: What.RACH:Hi, I'm sorry, I need to borrow your phone for just one minute. GUY: I'm talkin'!RACH: I can see that. I... just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for it myself. [man is still reluctant] OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone.GUY:Alright, fine. [on the phone] I'll call you back. [hands the phone to her]RACH: Thank you. OK. [dials] [to Michael] Machine. Just waiting for the beep.MIC H: Good.RACHEL:[on phone] Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, 馆”的情节你看我我在跟一个很棒的男人约会却满脑子是罗斯……还有他的芙莉我只是想忘了他天啊，为什么我不能呢? 听我说，我经历过离婚相信我，不会有事的你还看不出来因为你跟他还没有了结嘛了结就是那个，我就需要那个天啊，你太棒了我为什么没有想到?我要怎么了结?这没有一定的方法，这只是…你要用任何的方法只要能让你对他说：”我不在乎你了”就行了不在乎你就是这个了结抱歉对不起我需要跟你借一下电话我正在讲耶我看得出来我打一个电话就可以了很快的，我甚至会付钱给你你对你的电话有点诡异耶我待会儿再打给你谢了答录机我在等哔哔罗斯，我是瑞秋我只是打来说……一切都很好我为你……还有你的猫感到高兴对了，我认为你应该叫他麦克我在想名字……所以显然我不在乎你了我不在乎你了这就是我那位朋友所谓的”了结”摩妮卡，今天是礼拜天早’礼拜天我绝不跑步是神的日子你说停我们就停不，别这样啦，我们不能停还有三磅要减我是精力火车而你在车土你的约会怎么样啊?by the way, I think you should name Michael. And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. [hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket]COMMERCIAL BREAK[Scene:Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is answering the door in his robe.]CHAN: No, no, no, no, no, no [opens door to Monica] No. Monica, it's Sunday morning. I'm not running on a Sunday.MNCA: Why not?CHAN: Because it's Sunday. It's God's day.MNCA: OK, if you say stop, then we stop.CHAN: OK, stop.MNCA: No, c'mon, we can't stop, c'mon, we've got three more pounds to go. I am the energy train and you are on board. Woo-woo, woo-woo, woo-woo [Chandler walks out of the apartment, leaving Monica] Woo. [Scene:Rachel and Monica's apartment. Rachel is taking asprin. Ross enters.]ROSS: Hey Rach.RACH: Ahhhh.ROSS: Oh. And how was the date?RACH:Umm, I think there was a restaurant... I know there was wine. . . [Rachel looks at Ross as though she remembers something, but can't place what it is.]ROSS: Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cat toy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that?RACH: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember.ROSS: OK. Oh, oh, oh. [runs over and picks up the cat toy] RACH: Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me? ROSS: No, I stayed at Julie's last night.RACH: Huh.ROSS:Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages?RACH:Oh yeah, go ahead. [Rachel walks in her room. Ross picks up the phone and dials his machine to check his messages.]ROSS: Rach, I got a message from you. [pauses] Who's Michael? [Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.]RACH: Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . [jumps the couch and lands on Ross's back, finally getting the phone from him. Ro ss has a confused expression on his face.]ROSS: You're over me?RACH: Ohhhhhhhh God. [climbs off his back]ROSS: Wha... you're uh, you're, you're over me?RACH: Ohh, ohh. 我记得有家餐厅我还记得有酒事实上，芙莉在楼下叫计程车我想要拿猫玩具摩妮卡有没有说…你为什么那样看我?对不起，我不知道…我觉得我昨晚好像梦到你……但我不记得了在这儿我们昨晚有通电话吗?你有没有打给我? 没有，我昨晚住在芙莉那里事实上，我根本还没回家呢你介意我听一下留言吗?阿秋，我有你的留言麦克是谁啊?麦克是谁啊?天啊，罗斯，把电话挂掉电话给我·，你不在乎我了你是什么时候……在乎我的?什么?基本上…我对你有一些感觉你对我有感觉?那又怎样?你先对我有感觉的你知道我…我是说，你知道我有…钱德告诉我的钱德，他什么时候，他…你在中国的时候认识芙莉时芙莉?芙莉?那…天啊我需要躺下来不，你知道，我要站着我要站着……我要踱步我踱步，而且我站着现在你不在乎我了?你还在乎我吗?那…那是芙莉芙莉甜心，计程车在等喔我马上下来等等，你要走了?对，我得走我现在没有办法谈这个计程车在等着我有女朋友我要去领养一只猫你为什么在看犹太牧师弹电吉他?我找不到遥控器JOEY: Wow.PHOE: Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know, I mean, sex can be just about two people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see me again he can call and if not, that's fine too. So after a looooot of talking. . . I convinced him.JOEY: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.PHOE: Um-hum.JOEY: This man is my God.[Scene:Central Perk. Rachel is closing up and Ross comes in. Get your Kleenex.]RACH: Hi.ROSS: I didn't get a cat.RACH: Oh, that's um, interesting.ROSS:No, no it's not interesting. OK, it's very, very not interesting. In fact it's actually 100 percent completely opposite of interesting. RACH: Alright, I got it Ross.ROSS: You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me. RACH: [hurt] What?ROSS: I was doing great with Julie before I found out about you. RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?ROSS: Then you should have said something before I met her. RACH:I didn't know then. And how come you never said anything to me. ROSS: There was never a good time.RACH: Right, you, you only had a year. We only hung out every night. ROSS: Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try, Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or, or Italian guys.RACH:Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point? ROSS: The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm with somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed. RACH: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me?ROSS:Hey, I've been doin' it since the ninth grade, I've gotten pretty damn good at it.RACH: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross. ROSS: Fine.RACH: 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship.ROSS: Good.RACH: Good. [Ross leaves][Rachel gets up and opens the door, yelling after him.]RACH: And ya know what, now I've got closure.[Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him. She smiles. She goes to open the 太迟了我在跟别人交往，我很快乐这艘船开航了你喜欢什么时候拦开感情都可以吗?我从初三就开始这样了我早驾轻就熟了那好，你尽管去做吧，罗斯我告诉你，我不需要你的蠢船好好你知道吗?我现在了结了试试下面那个摩妮卡，现在是早上六点半我们不再去运动，结束了怎么啦?只剩一磅，来啦我们运动，我们移动我们在其中舞动我不在乎我的最后一磅我很喜欢这最后一磅所以不要这我做下终生遗憾的事那你要做什么，肥仔?什么?没什么，除了告诉你我觉得你精力这么充沛真棒谢了尤其是你现在去找工作找得焦头烂额你不能告诉你父母你被开除了因为他们会非常的失望尤其你又没有男朋友可以借肩膀让你哭没有，但是我…我是说，如果是我的话我想我会连起床都会很困难我试着保持积极你想出去跑一跑吗?好吧你知道你不一定要去跑的你可以在这里睡一下door and can't get the lock undone.]ROSS: Try the bottom one.[She opens the door and they kiss.][Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler answers th e door to find Monica.]CLOSING CREDITSCHAN: Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out, it's over.MNCA:No way, with one pound to go, c'mon. We're workin', we're movin', we're in the zone we're groovin'.CHAN: OK, I don't, I don't mind the last pound. OK, in fact I kind of like the last pound. OK, so don't make me do anything that I'll regret.MNCA: Ooh, what'cha gonna do, fat boy, huh? What?CHAN: Nothing, except tell y ou, uh, I think it's wonderful how much energy you have.MNCA: Well, thanks.CHAN: I mean, especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work.MNCA: Well, you know.CHAN: You know, I mean, you can't tell your parents you were fired because they'd be disappointed.MNCA: [sad] Uh-huh.CHAN: And it's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on. MNCA: Well no, but um.CHAN:I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have difficulty just getting out of bed at all.MNCA: Y'know, I try to stay positive. . .CHAN: So, you feel like goin' for a run?MNCA: Alright.CHAN: Because, you know, you don't have to. If you want, you could just take a nap right here.MNCA: OK. Just for a little while.CHAN: OK. [Puts an afghan over her and dances into his room]END。

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202 The One With the Breast Milk[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]MONICA:(entering from her bedroom carrying a present) Ok, these were unbelievably expensive, and I know he's gonna grow out of them in like, 20 minutes, but I couldn't resist. (There a little pair of Nike shoes.) PHOEBE: Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it. (Ben starts to cry) Oh my god, oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?SUSAN: Oh, is he hungry already?CAROL: I guess so. (Carol starts to breast feed Ben.) CHANDLER: You know, it's... (sees the feeding taking place next to him) something funny about sneakers. I'll be right back. (Goes into the kitchen)JOEY: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.ROSS: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing? CHANDLER: We're just hanging out by the spoons. Ladle?ROSS:Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world.JOEY: Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.ROSS: This is my son having lunch, ok? It's gonna happen a lot, so you'd better get used to it. Now if you have any problem with it, if you're uncomfortable, just ask questions. Carol's fine with it, now come on.(They go back into the living room)CHANDLER: Carol, Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding?CAROL: Sure.JOEY: Uh, does it hurt?CAROL: It did at first, but not anymore.JOEY: Chandler?CHANDLER: So, uh, how often can you do it?CAROL: As much as he needs.JOEY: Ok, I got one, I got one. If he blows into one, does the other one get bigger?OPENING TITLES[Scene: Central Perk, the gang is all there.]JULIE: Rachel, do you have any muffins left?RACHEL: Yeah, I forget which ones.JULIE:Oh, you're busy, that's ok, I'll get it. Anybody else want one? ALL: No thanks.JULIE: Oh, you're losin' your apron here, let me get it. There you go. (Ties it back up for her)RACHEL: (to Julie) Thank you. (under her breath to Chandler) What a bitch.JULIE:Oh, listen you guys. I have this friend at Bloomingdales who's 202 母乳这些非常昂贵我知道他很快就穿不下…但是我就是无法抗拒看看这些嗨，班做了就对!是不是对他压力太大?他已经饿了吗?我想是的他已经饿了吗?我想是的球鞋真的很有趣我马上就回来!我也要一个你们在干什么?我们只是来看看汤匙要调羹吗?你们成熟一点好吗?这是世上最自然美丽的我们知道担心在有个婴儿在吸它这是我儿子在吃午餐你们最好习惯如果你们感到不自在发问就好卡萝不介意的卡萝?我想问问乔伊能不能提出关于哺乳的问题?当然可以会不会痛?刚开始会，现在不会了钱德?你能多久喂一次?只要他需要就可以我想到了一个问题如果他对一个吹气另一个会不会变大? 还有松糕吗?还有，我忘记是哪一种你太忙了，我来拿你的围裙松了，我帮你系好了谢好谢真是个恶婆娘!我有朋友在布明岱尔百货上班明天就不干了他想要花掉他的折扣优待谁想跟我去捡便宜?我不行我要带我祖母去看兽医我跟你去我跟你去哈罗，各位你不能跟她去逛百货瑞秋怎么办?会有问题，对不对?quitting tomorrow and he wants to abuse his discount. So, anyone want to come with me and take advantage of it?PHOEBE: I can't, I have to take my grandmother to the vet. MONICA: Ok, um, I'll go with you.JULIE: Great.ROSS: (enters) Hi, honey.CHANDLER: Hey, sweetums.ROSS: Hello to the rest.ALL: Hi!JOEY:Monica what're you doin'? You can't go shopping with her? What about Rachel?MONICA: It's gonna be a problem, isn't it?CHANDLER: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdales with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.MONICA: But I'm--PHOEBE: Monica, she will kill you. She will kill you like a dog in the street.ROSS: So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow? MONICA: Yeah, uh, it's actually not that big a deal.ROSS:It's a big deal to me. This is great, Monica. I really appreciate this.MONICA: You're welcome.PHOEBE: Woof, woof.[Scene: A Department Store, Joey is selling men's cologne.] JOEY: Bijan for men? Bijan for men? Bijan for men? Hey Annabelle. ANNABELLE: Hey, Joey. So did you hear about the new guy?JOEY: Who?ANNABELLE: Nobody knows his name. Me and the girls just call him the Hombre man.JOEY: What's he doin' in my section?ANNABELLE: I guess he doesn't know.JOEY: Well, he's gonna. I'll see you a little later, ok? Hey, how ya doin'?TODD: Mornin'.JOEY:Listen, I know you're new, but it's kinda understood that everything from Young Men's to the escalator is my territory. TODD: Your territory, huh?JOEY: Yeah. Bijan for men?GUY: No thanks.TODD: Hombre?GUY: Yeah. All right.TODD: You were saying?[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Monica enters.] MONICA: Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day.PHOEBE: What?MONICA: We were shopping, and we had lunch.PHOEBE: Oh, all right. What did I have? 你要跟芙莉去布明岱尔就像是到瑞秋家中偷汉子她会宰了你她会宰了你就像宰街上的流浪狗芙莉说你们明天要去逛街其实没有什么…对我很重要，非常重要我非常感激你这么做别客气碧而泉男性香水?听说过新来的人吗?没人知道他的名字我们女生都叫他“原野奇侠”原野奇侠?他到我这一区干什么?我想他不知道他必须知道待会见你好吗?你好吗?听着，我知道你是新来的…但众所周知这附近的一切从年轻人部门到电梯…都是我的地盘你的地盘?碧而泉男性香水?不，谢了原野奇侠?原野奇侠?你刚才说什么?菲此，听着，你跟我一起逛了整天街买东西我们买东西，吃午餐我吃了什么?难怪我觉得饿嗨，怎么样?我整天都跟摩妮卡买东西吃了一客沙拉很好，菲比你们买了什么?买了皮毛你去买皮毛?然后我发现我反对买皮毛于是我们买了一些…波霸你买了波霸?胸罩!我们买了胸罩碧而泉男性香水?碧而泉…嗨，安娜贝下班后我们可以喝个咖啡吗?MONICA: You had a salad.PHOEBE: Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.RACHEL: (entering) Hey, guys, what's up.PHOEBE: I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had a salad. RACHEL: Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?PHOEBE: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.RACHEL: You went shopp ing for fur?PHOEBE: Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh, so then we bought some, (sees Monica pointing at her chest) uh, boobs. RACHEL: You bought boobs?PHOEBE: (Monica is yanking on her bra strap) Bras! We bought bras! We bought bras.[Scene: The Department Store, Joey is trying to sell some cologne.] JOEY: Bijan for men? Hey, Annabelle, Uh, listen, I was wondering if maybe after work you and I could go maybe grab a cup of coffee. ANNABELLE: Oh, actually I sorta have plans.TODD: Ready, Annabelle?ANNABELLE: You bet. Maybe some other time?JOEY: Hey, it's not the first time I lost a girl to a cowboy spraying cologne. Bijan for men?[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol is dropping Ben off for Ross to watch.]CAROL:Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is only for after his naps, not before his naps or he won't sleep.ROSS:Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.SUSAN:Honey, relax. Ross is great with him. Don't look so surprised. I'm a lovely person.RACHEL: Oh, this is so cute.SUSAN: Oh, I got that for him.ROSS: My mommies love me. That's clever.MONICA: Hello? Oh, Hi, Ju-- Hi, Jew! Uh huh? Uh huh? Ok. Um, sure, that'd be great. See ya then. Bye.RACHEL: Did you just say Hi, Jew?MONICA:Yes. Uh, yes, I did. That was my friend, Eddie Moskowitz. Yeah, he likes it. Reaffirms his faith.PHOEBE: Ben, din ner!ROSS: Thanks Aunt Pheebs. Hey, you didn't microwave that, did you, because it's breast milk, and you're not supposed to do that. PHOEBE: Duh, I think I know how to heat breast milk. Ok. CHANDLER: What did you just do?PHOEBE: I licked my arm, what?ROSS: It's breast milk.PHOEBE: So?RACHEL: Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from a person.JOEY: What is the big deal?CHANDLER: What did you just do?ROSS: Ok, would people stop drinking the breast m ilk? 我已经有计昼了准备好了吗，安娜贝?好了以后再约吧我又不是没被啧香水的牛仔抢走女孩子过碧而泉男性香水?这是滑稽小丑只有睡过午觉才可以给他玩否则他会睡不着我带过他，我们玩得很高兴我们又笑又玩就像父亲跟儿子一样罗斯很会带他别这么惊讶我是个很好的人好可爱!我为他买的真聪明真聪明嗨，犹太人!好的，可以很好，待会见你刚才是不是说：嗨，犹太人?对，我是这么说那是我的犹太朋友艾迪莫斯考维兹他很喜欢这称呼能加强他的信仰班，吃晚餐了谢谢，菲此姑妈你没有用微波炉吧?不应该这样处理母乳我想我知道如何加热母乳你在干什么?我舔了我的手臂，怎么样?那是母乳又怎么样?菲此那是从另一个人身上挤出的汁有什么了不起?你又在干什么?大家能不能不要喝母乳?你连尝都不尝?不能假装那是牛奶吗?就算卡萝的乳房贴了牛奶寻人广告都不行大家到哪里去了?带班去公园了，你去哪里了?出去吃了午餐，只有我一个人与自己共度美好时光你也可以向我借这是你的钥匙PHOEBE: You won't even taste it?ROSS: No!PHOEBE: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?ROSS: Not even if Carol's breast had a picture of a missing child on it.MONICA: Hey, where is everybody?RACHEL: They took Ben to the park. Where've you been?MONICA: Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.RACHEL: Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by the way. Here are your keys, hon. Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars?MONICA: You know w hat probably happened? Someone musta stolen my credit card.RACHEL: And sorta just put the receipt back in your pocket MONICA: That is an excellent excellent question. That is excellent. RACHEL: Monica, what is with you? Who'd you have lunch with? MONICA: Judy.RACHEL: Who?MONICA: Julie.RACHEL: What?MONICA: Jody.RACHEL: You were with Julie?MONICA: Look, when it started I was just trying to be nice to her because she was my brother's girlfriend. And then, one thing led to another and, before I knew it, we were...shopping.RACHEL: Oh. Oh my god.MONICA: Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me.RACHEL: Yeah, right.MONICA: Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out. RACHEL: Oh, please, you wanted to get caught.MONICA: That is not true!RACHEL: Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here? MONICA: Did it ever occur to you that I might just be that stupid? RACHEL: Ok, Monica. I just have to know one thing. Did you go with her to Bloomingdales? Oh! Ok, ok, ok, I just really, uh, I just really need to not be with you right now.MONICA: Hi, who's this? Hi, Joanne. Is Rachel working? It's Monica. Yes, I know I did a horrible thing. Joanna, it's not as simple as all that, ok? No, I don't care what Steve thinks. Hi, Steve. CAROL: How did we do?PHOEBE: Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freaked out.ROSS: I did not freak out.CAROL: Why'd you freak out?ROSS: Because it's breast milk. It's gross.CAROL: My breast milk is gross? 如果你一个人吃午餐怎么会要五十三块? 你知道大概发生什么事吗?定有人偷了我的信用卡然后把收据放回你口袋?这是个非常好的问题真的非常好朱蒂，谁？朱蒂，什么？裘迪你跟芙莉在一起?刚开始我只是想对她友善点•，因为她是我哥哥的女友然后事情接着发生…我还不清楚，我们就…去瞎拼了我的天慢着，我们只做了一次对我没有任何意义!我一直想的是你对不起，好吗?我不希望你知道的拜托!你希望被逮到才不是!所以你不小心留收据在这里?我会这么笨?好，我必须知道一件事你是不是跟她去布明岱尔?我现在不能跟你在一起了嗨，哪一位?嗨，琼安，瑞秋在吗?我是摩妮卡我知道我做了很糟糕的事琼安，事情没这么简单我才不在乎史提夫怎么想嗨，史提夫情况如何?我尝了班的奶水罗斯发癫了我没有发癫你为什么发癫?因为那是母乳很呕心我的奶水很呕心?这会很好玩这没什么不对我只是不认为母乳是给大人喝的当然母乳的容器很吸引大人与小孩别傻了，我试过，没什么口尝一尝不行很自然又不难吃有一点甜，很像…SUSAN: This should be fun.ROSS:No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just don't think breast milk is for adults.CHANDLER: Of course the packaging does appeal to grown-ups and kids alike.CAROL:Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no big deal. Just taste it.ROSS: That would be no.PHOEBE: Come on. It doesn't taste bad.JOEY: Yeah, it's kinda sweet, sorta like, uh--SUSAN: Cantaloupe juice.JOEY: Exactly.ROSS: You've tasted it? You've tasted it.SUSAN: Uh huh.ROSS: Oh, you've tasted it.SUSAN: You can keep saying it, but it won't stop being true. ROSS: Gimme the bottle. Gimme the towel.CHANDLER: Howdy.JOEY: Gimme a box a juice. Well, they switched me over to Hombre. CHANDLER: Well, maybe it's because of the way you're dressed. JOEY: Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so good they wanna put more people on it. You should see this guy, Chandler, he goes through two bottles a day.CHANDLER: What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.JOEY: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best.I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.CHANDLER:All right, say you do that. You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. And then where're you gonna run?JOEY: Yeah I guess you're right.CHANDLER: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie.JOEY: I'm gonna do it.CHANDLER:All right. Now go see Miss Kitty and she'll fix you up with a nice hooker.MONICA: I don't know what else to say.RACHEL: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening. MONICA: I feel terrible, I really do.RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife?MONICA: Rachel, say that I'm friends with her, we spend some time together. Is that so terrible?RACHEL: Yes.MONICA: It's that terrible?RACHEL: Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed 像什么?哈密瓜汁没错你尝过了喔，你尝过了你可以一直说下去也不会变成假话把奶瓶给我把毛巾给我吃饱没?给我一罐果汁他们把我调到原野奇侠了也许是因为你的穿着或因为那家伙表现太好了他们要增加人手那家伙一天用掉两瓶你在乎什么?你是个演员这只是你的副业，没什么我知道，但我本来是最棒的我喜欢当最棒的也许我应该退出江湖厨具部门需要有人切乳酪假如你这么做了将来迟早有人会出现乳酪切得此你更好那时候你要逃到哪里?也许你说得对我说你应该发挥大丈夫气概让他知道你是内衣部西边最厉害的原野奇侠!我要这么做现在去找猫咪小姐她会介绍个好妓女给你我不知道该说什么很好，因为我不会听我觉得很糟糕，真的对不起我的背伤害了你的刀吗?我跟她交朋友，一起去逛街这有什么不好?真的很不好吗?是的，你还不懂吗?她偷走我的男人已经够糟了…我可能会跟他长相厮守但现在她竟然…现在她竟然连你也抢走了!你在说什么?没人能把我从你那里抢走我与她交朋友不会影响我与你的感情你是我的…喂，我知道这与我完全无关to be with, but now, she's actually, but now she's actually stealing you.MONICA: Me? What are you talking about? Nobody could steal me from you. I mean, just because I'm friends with her doesn't make me any less friends with you. I mean, you're my...We're, we're...Oh, I love you.RACHEL: I love you too.PHOEBE: You guys, um I know that this really doesn't have anything to do with me, but um I love you guys too. Oh, I really needed that. MONICA:Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?RACHEL: I'd do anything for you, you know that.MONICA: I'd do anything for you.PHOEBE: Wait, wait, wait, wait!JOEY: Mornin'. I said, mornin'.TODD: I heard ya.STORE GUY:All right, everybody, I'm openin' the doors. You boys ready? TODD: Ready.JOEY: Yeah, I'm ready.CUSTOMER: You idiot, you stupid cowboy, you blinded me, I'm suing! STORE GUY: Oh my god, Todd! What the hell did you do?TODD: I'm sorry. I am such a doofus. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. ANNABELLE: My god, what happened?JOEY:These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'. Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now? ANNABELLE: Sure.JULIE: So.RACHEL: So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit.I mean, you know, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, thoug h, right?JULIE:I know, I probably shouldn't even tell you this, but I'm pretty much totally intimidated by you.RACHEL: Really? Me?JULIE: Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I really wanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got the feeling that maybe you don't. RACHEL: Well, you're not totally paranoid.JULIE: Oy.RACHEL: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right. JULIE: Thanks. Hey, listen, would you like to go to a movie sometime or something? 但我也爱你们！我很需要这样我知道现在…你很想恨死芙莉但是她没有做错什么她只是认识了一个男生现在他们在交往我想如果你给她一个机会你会喜欢她的你愿意给她一个机会吗?为了我?我愿意为你做任何事你知道的我什么都愿意为你做等一下!我说：早我听见了我要开门了你们准备好了吗?好了我也好了我也好了你弄瞎我了!我要告你们天啊!陶德!你在搞什么鬼对不起，我真是笨手笨脚!对不起，非常对不起老天，发生什么事?这些菜乌，都撑不了很久这些菜乌，都撑不了很久…捅出纰漏我们去喝杯咖啡怎么样?我想我们应该亲近亲近你知道的我们从来没有真正谈过话我想你说得对因为你是我们两个之我知道我也许不该告诉你…你在开玩笑吗?罗斯还是对你很着迷…我真的希望你喜欢我也许我只是胡思乱想…但我好像觉得你不喜欢我你不是完全胡思乱想当你与罗斯刚开始交往时•，我真的很难过…有太多理由，我不要烦你但我看到他非常快乐，而且你们在一起是多么相配摩妮卡一直说你有多好…我真讨厌她说得对谢谢你想不想一起去看电影或出去玩?。

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