英式幽默笑话英文版阅读

英式幽默笑话英文版阅读

我为妈妈煮了一杯茶双语阅读

Have you notlced that children sometimes tyr to be helpful,but lt makes vour life more complicated? This story is about a sick mother whose darUng daughter want to be a good nurse.

不知道你注意到没有，孩子们有时想帮你的忙，但却让你的生活更加复杂。下面是一位患病的母亲，她可爱的女儿想好好照顾她的故事。

A:Mummy,let me fluff the pillow fo you

妈妈，让我把枕头给你抖松。

B:OK.

好吧。

A:Mummy,here is a magazine you can read it.

妈妈，这是本杂志，你可以看看它。

B:OK.Thank you!

好吧。谢谢你。

A:Mumrny,I make a cup of tea for you,here vou are.

妈妈，我为你煮了一杯茶，给你。

B:Drinking Why.vou are auch sweetheafi,I didn't know you could make tea.

喝茶真是好女儿，我不知道休还会煮茶。

A:Oh.yes.I put the tea leaves in the water like you do,and I boiled it.and then I strained it into a cup.But I couldn't find a strainer, so I used the flyswatter.

哦，是的，我像你那样把茶叶放在水中，煮开，然后我把它过滤到水杯里。但是我找不到过滤器，我就用了苍蝇拍。

B:You what?

你用了什么?

A:Oh,don'l worry,Mummy.I didn't use the new flyswatter.I used the old one.

哦，别担心，妈妈。我没用新的苍蝇拍，我用的是旧的。

迷情酒吧双语阅读

In England nobody under the age of eighteen is allowed to drink in a public bar. One day, Mr.Tomposon and his son who had his eigh-teenth birthday go to a public bar.

英格兰，不满18岁是不允许到酒馆喝酒的，一天汤普森在他儿子18岁生日那天，带着他去了酒馆。

A:You are so strict that you never took me here before, Daddy.

爸爸，你太严格了，以前你从不带我来这里。

B:Because you were not old enough.

因为你还不够大。

A:I see.

我知道。

After half an hour.半小时以后。

B:Now, Tom,1 want to teach you a useful lesson. You must alway s be careful not to drink too much.

汤姆，现在我给你上一课。你必须注意永远不要喝得过多。

A:Can I know when I have had enough?

我怎么才能知道我喝够了呢?

B:Well,I'll tell you.Do you see those two lights at the end o fthe

bar?When they seem to have become four, you've had enough and should go home.

听着，你看见酒馆那头的两盏灯了吗?当那儿的灯变成四盏的时候，你就喝够了，该回家了。

A:But Dad,I can only see one light at the end of the bar.

可是，爸爸，我只看见那儿有一盏灯呀。

霓裳炫影双语阅读

When a village fool blossomed out all of a sudden in new clothes,the neighbors wondered at his property.

村子里的白痴突然发了大财，穿上了新衣服，邻居们对他的暴富感到很惊奇。

A:What's happened to you?

你做了什么事?

B:1 won the first prize in the lottery.

我中了头彩。

A:How did you come to guess the luck number?

你是怎么猜中幸运号码的?

B:Well, three times running I dreamed of seven; so I figured it out that three times seven are twenty-four, and I bought ticket number 24 I won the first prize.

哦，我做梦梦见了7这个号码三次。于是我算出7的3倍是24.于是我买了号码是24的彩票。这张票中了头彩。

A:NVhy, you blamed fool, three times seven is twenty-one, not twenty-four.

哎呀，你这个该死的傻瓜，7的3倍是21不是24。

B:Is that so? Well, twenty-four won, anyway.

是这样吗?哦，不管怎么说，24中了。

窈窕塑身双语阅读

A healthy mind is in a healthy body.

健全的精神寓于健康的体魄。

A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai Hospital. While on the op-erating table, she had a near-death experience.She saw God.

一个叫雪莉的妇女来自贝弗利山。一天，她心脏病发作，被送进了塞达斯辛耐医院。在手术台上，她经历了生死的瞬间。她见到了上帝。

A:Is this it?