成都信息工程学院 媒体英语视听说自编教材 Unit3

Unit 3
Romance
Clip One
Sensitive Questions in Love
New Words & Expressions
contributor 投稿者;捐助人psychiatrist 精神病医生
infatuated热恋的, 着迷的flirt调情; 打情骂俏
rivalry竞争, 竞赛,较量sisterly姐妹一般的, 象姐妹的
culpability苛责;有罪fragile虚弱的, 脆弱的
visual视力的，视觉的ridiculous a. 可笑的,荒谬的
commitment承诺, 许诺, 保证scenario事态，局面
it takes two to tango 一个巴掌拍不响
be stuck with: 与不喜欢的某人/某事物在一起；被…缠住无法摆脱
Script:
On the Couch with Dr. Gail Saltz
(NBC)Today contributor and psychiatrist Dr. Gail Saltz answers relationship questions.
This morning on our continuing series, On the Couch with Dr. Gail Saltz, our Today contributor and psychiatrist helps you cope with some serious relationship problems.
Hostess: Gail, good to see you.
Gail: Good to be here.
Host: Ok, let's go right to the emails, coz' we've got some really interesting stories here. First email we've received: my sister is infatuated with my boyfriend and constantly flirts with him. I've ignored it to keep the peace in our family. My mother says I should forget about it. But what she's doing is hurting me. What should I do?
Gail: You know sister rivalry is so common, and even when you grow up, it's common still. But there are a couple of people involved in what's going on. You need to talk to the boyfriend: I don't appreciate you flirting back, coz' let's face it, it takes two to tango. You need to talk to the mom and say: Hey, peace at any price? This is really hurting me. Why would you support this? But mostly you need to talk to your sister and say: Look, if you're still feeling rivalrous with me over something, we need to talk about what that is. Because stealing my boyfriend is not the sisterly way to go. We need to talk about what's in your qua that you're acting out here.
Hostess: And the culpability as mom to say keep the peace (at any price), as there is the thing that makes me feel, you know, uneasy about that. (It's, Of course it's very hurtful to her.)
Gail: It's not uncommon, unfortunately, to have one parent feel that somehow one of their children is more fragile than the other and support that child more and that might be going on here.
Hostess: ok, let s look at the second email: My boyfriend is constantly looking at other women. I see him gaze, and they smile back. It's like, "Boy, I'd love to be with you, but I'm stuck with her." It hurts me, and when I talk to him about it, he says that he is a man, and that's what men do. My female friends tell me not to worry-that he's just looking. I'm young, in great shape, I love him. But why am I so unhappy?
Gail: You're unhappy because he is RUDE. And he's not taking your feelings into consideration. You know,
you hear this a lot, men are visual and they can't help it. I say that's kind of ridiculous. Everybody is visual. And everybody likes to look at what attracts them. But people stop looking at other things that attract them in an obvious way because they don't want to hurt the person they are with. So he's not listening to how you feel. You need the basics to explain to him how would you feel if I checked out the tush of every guy that I thought was attractive. That wouldn't make you feel good either. It really should be the same for the sexes and while everybody wants to look, people control that out of consideration for their partner. Hostess: Ok, great advice. Ok let s look at email No. three: I often repeat a pattern in my romantic relationships: I get close to a boyfriend, feel emotional pressure, start to see his faults, and then break up with him. Then once the pressure is off, I reconnect with him. This is driving me current boyfriend crazy. I can't figure out if he is just wrong for me, or if I have commitment issues.
Gail: Well, this is a very good question and a common scenario. One way to help you tell the difference is: if this is your MO, meaning if in past relationships you've tended to do this, I get close, I want you, I want you; oh, now you are here, now go away, then probably you do have a commitment issue and a fear of intimacy. On the other hand, if that's not being your past history, you've had long relationships, they've worked out, but now it s happening just with this guy, it may be more that this guy isn't really working for you, but you are afraid of being alone. Many women are afraid of not having someone with them.
Hostess: With a fear of intimacy, right?
Gail: Well, if you've been able to be intimate in the past, (You should be (like) it.)that's less likely. But if in fact it is only with this guy, then sometimes it's: I wanna be with a guy and even this not good guy is better than no guy at all, which I would say, is not the way to go. If you keep having problems, it's probably time to move on.
Hostess: Ok, let s look at the fourth email: My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years. His mother kisses my boyfriend on the lips just before she goes to sleep. I have never been comfortable with it. When I recently mentioned it, he said that it was not a big deal, and that she's always done that. She has three daughters and does not kiss them on the lips. Is this weird?
Gail: Well, probably a lot of people are going eek. But let me say this, for a mother and a son, they' re sort of each other's loves for a long time. It's very normal for mom to be your first love when you're a little boy. And hopefully one day you grow up and you'll pick up a girl that reminds you of mom in the positive ways but is not mom. On the other hand, unfortunately, some moms have trouble letting it go and so they keep some sort of connection going and this may be one of them. If this is the only one, I'd say, all right, tell him you don't like it. But I wouldn't do worry too much. But if there are other things, like he listens to everything she says, she calls all the time, she's there all the time, he just may not be available for you, which could be a big problem.
Hostess: Gail, excellent advice, as always.
Gail: My pleasure.
Hostess: Thank you so much.
Exercises
1 Summarize the Issues in the 4 E-mails.
Email 1 (key words—sister, boyfriend):
“my” sister is infatuated with “my” boyfr iend and constantly flirts with him.
Email 2 (key words—boyfriend, other women):
“My” boyfriend is constantly looking at other women. “I” see him gaze, and they smile back.
Email 3 (key words—boyfriend, get close to, break up, reconnect)
“I” often repeat a pattern in my romantic relationships: “I” get close to a boyfriend, feel emotional pressure, start to see his faults, and then break up with him. Then once the pressure is off, “I” reconnect with him. Email 4 (key words—boyfriend, his mother):
My bo y friend’s mother kisses him on the lips just before he goes to sleep.
Multiple Choices.
1). When a woman discovers her sister constantly flirting with her boyfriend and their mother wants to keep peace in the family, the woman should mostly talk to B
A. Her boyfriend
B. Her sister
C. Her mother
D. A psychologist.
2). S ome people hold that men are visual and they can’t help looking at those pretty women, Gail regards this idea as D
A. Natural
B. Understandable
C. Correct
D. Ridiculous
3). C like(s) to look at what attracts them when they encounter a crowd of people.
A. Most men
B. Most women
C. Both men and women
D. Neither men nor women
4). Due to a kind of emotional pressure, a woman breaks up with her boyfriend, but once the pressure vanishes, she wants to resume the relationship. If this situation happens just one time, the reason of their breaking up is probably C
A. She doesn’t love him.
B. She has lost interest in him.
C. She is afraid of intimacy.
D. They really have problems.
5). If a mom has a habit of kissing her adult son on the lip, her behavior could be explained as D
A. They two have a weird relationship.
B. The mother should feel ashamed.
C. The son is still treated as a little boy.
D. The behavior is psychologically natural because it’s very normal for mom to be his first love when he is a little boy.
Clip Two
Brain Science about Love
New Words & Expressions
Valentine's Day情人节Literally逐字地,实在地
reveal展现,揭露;暴露mystical神秘的
FMRI机能性磁共振成像metabolic变化的;新陈代谢的stimulation刺激;兴奋;激励suppress镇压, 抑制,忍住隐瞒
coincide同时发生,相符,巧合exhilarate使振奋;使高兴
circuit环行;巡回区;巡回路线mundane 世俗的, 寻常的，普通的
Script
As Valentine's Day was coming, a lot of people had love on the brain - quite literally, according to new medical technology that reveals the "mechanical" side of romance.
What is love? And can it potentially throw our senses out of balance? New advances in medical technology mean even the mysteries of love are becoming less mystical and more mechanical. Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (FMRI) is a procedure that uses Magnetic Resonance Imaging to measure the tiny metabolic changes that take place in an active part of the brain. FMRI brain scans allow physicians to determine which part of the brain is handling critical functions, such as thought, speech, movement and sensation. Now some believe this includes love.
Semir Zeki, Professor of Neurasthenics at University College, London, has studied how our brain reacts to emotional stimulation. Zeki was surprised to discover that love uses less of the brain than he thought.
It is surprising because romantic love really is all engaging in the sense that it, it basically modifies our behaving, our way of behaving. It… We want to get dressed better. We want to look better. We want to… We are concerned about the person we love. So one would have thought that large, very large parts of the brain would be involved, but it turns out there is a sort of basically four, five areas that are especially active when one is in love.
Zeki says love stimulates parts of the brain which suppress our critical faculties. He says romantic attachment activates regions in the brain’s reward sys tem. These coincide with areas rich in oxytocin and vasopressin receptors which deactivate faculties associated with negative emotions, social judgment and the assessment of other people’s intentions and emotions. This, Zeki believes, explains the power of love to motivate and exhilarate. So far, Zeki has not found any evidence to distinguish the way men and women are wired for love.
At the level at which we are saying this, you must remember this is a very, very new kind of study, because before, you could not say it, I mean, love is a subjective state, how could you say? Now we have developed a technology to do that. At the level at which we are talking, there should be no differences between male and female brains. I mean, the circuits of directive are very, very similar in both. However, I would be amazed, if with final analysis, one does not find differences, I mean, there are...there are differences in the way that women love and the way that men love too. There is no doubt about that. We’ll find them i n time.
Psychologist Dr. Linda Papadopoulos warns the scientific studies being done by Zeki might lead to some people feeling that things that belong to the soul have become too mundane. She says love is not all down to chemicals.
All those things that kind of belong to the soul now seem to belong to the body. The truth is--it is an interaction of both. Yes, those chemicals are involved in making you fall in love, but so is the way your father treated you. So it’s your belief about yourself and how much lo ve you deserve. So are your beliefs about romanticism and what you consider attractive or unattractive. So it’s not as if we are throwing away all the valentines cards and the flowers and saying you spray on some pheromones and that’s it--you are in love or out of love, as the case may be. But what we are saying is there is a reason that you get that heartbeat, there is a reason that you get that feeling with some people.
But if our brain tricks us into thinking the person we love can do no wrong, the poets may well be right to claim that love is blind. What the scientists haven’t quite worked out yet is exactly what makes us lose our senses when we fall in love in the first place.
Exercises
1 Watch the video and answer the following questions.
1) What is FMRI?
Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (FMRI) is a procedure that uses Magnetic Resonance Imaging to measure the tiny metabolic changes that take place in an active part of the brain.
2) What’s the function of a FMRI brain scan?
FMRI brain scans allow physicians to determine which part of the brain is handling critical functions, such as thought, speech, movement and sensation.
3) Why does Prof. Zeki feel surprised?
Zeki was surprised to discover that love uses less of the brain than he thought.
4) How many areas in the brain are especially active when someone is in love?
There is a sort of basically four, five areas that are especially active when one is in love.
5) As to the studies by Prof. Zeki, what’s Dr. Papadopoulos’ warning?
Psychologist Dr. Linda Papadopoulos warns the scientific studies being done by Zeki might lead to some people feeling that things that belong to the soul have become too mundane.
2 True or False.
1) Prof. Zeki has found some evidences to distinguish the way men and women are wired for love.
□True □False
2) The circuits of directive are different between male and female brains.
□True □False
3) Dr. Linda Papadopoulos holds that love is more than chemicals.
□True □False
4) The scientists still don’t know what makes people lose their senses when they fall in love in the first place.
□True □False
3 Fill in the Blanks
1) New advances in medical technology mean even the mysteries of love are becoming less mystical and more mechanical.
2) According to Dr. Linda Papadopoulos, love is an interaction of body and soul .
3)Yes, those chemicals are involved in making you fall in love, but so is the way your father treated you . So it’s your belief about yourself and how much love you deserve. . So are your beliefs about romanticism and what you consider attractive or unattractive .
Clip Three
Are You Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places?
New Words & Expressions
addicted 上瘾的dabble涉猎；涉足；浅尝
high兴奋感、情绪高涨fleeting疾驰的,飞逝的
craving渴望,热望roller-coaster过山车
compulsion 冲动phase阶段, 时期
seductive具有诱惑力的，有吸引力的
abusive虐待的；骂人的、辱骂性的
Harley Davidsons哈雷戴维森，哈雷摩托(美国著名摩托车品牌)
creepy令人毛骨悚然的，怪异的，离奇的
narcissist 自我陶醉者intimacy亲密, 密切,关系密切
Script:
(NBC) 'Today' show host Katie Couric talks with Dr. Carole Lieberman about women that are addicted to bad boys.
Dr. Carole Lieberman is the author of Bad Boys -- Why we love them, How to live with them and When to leave them. Dr.Lieberman, good to see you. Is it the case of smart women making foolish choices or is it really an addiction?
You actually can say that it's an addiction because most women dabble or experiment with bad boys just like people experiment with drugs. But there are a lot of women and an increasing number of women who actually become addicted to the high, to the pursuit, the high drama pursuit of the boy , of the man. And also the high of a feeling even though it maybe for fleeting moments ,that bad man who nobody else could get ,you know, he's been a trouble-maker for lots of other people , and you have managed to capture his heart at least for a few moments , and then there is the crash, you know, just like with drugs. the craving, the high and the crash. And...
It sounds these women who just crave drama in their lives, in other words , they get easily bored so they want kind of ro, an emotional roller-coaster?
That's part of it, but it actually goes deeper. Um, I call these women "hooked on heartbreak" and that reflects the fact that what they are doing is , they have a repetition compulsion , they have the compulsion to repeat a family drama. When little girls um, are between the ages of 2 to 7 approximately, they try to get their father(s) away from their mother(s). And in most cases, you know, this is a normal phase and it works out with the father actually makes the little girl feels as though she still is attractive, lovable, and it's just obviously he is not attainable. But for fathers who are absent, um, who are too seductive with the girl, who are abusive. There are all different kinds of fathers who can have disfunctional relationships with their
daughter(s). And in those cases the little girls grow up to be women who want to keep repeating this pattern , but making it come out with a happier ending.
So, how do you figure out what are the warning size, cos bad boys just aren't, you know, riding Harley Davidsons and even necessarily having bad habits they could just be creepy narcissist , right?
Yes, that's one type. In fact, a lot of, all bad boys to some degree have that sense of," it's about me". That's what women don't get. They have all these fun nerve temporarily , have all these fun, winning the pursuit and temporary high but really what they don't get they see the wounded little boy inside.
And they have these rescue fantasies. And they have rescue fantasies and what they don't get is really the man knows to get out sooner than the woman. The woman will hang in there until she's really brokenhearted. And the man would either leave or he will do behaviors that will make the woman push him away. So, he protects himself, he protects his heart a lot better than the woman do, who just go inner to the end and it's because of this repetition compulsion, because in the sense you can never keep repeating the same behavior and have it come out with a different ending.
Can these people be fixed, the man?
Yes. The man can be fixed and women could do this.
And not by women necessarily.(Well)They have to be fixed by themselves, don't they?
Well, what has to happen is both of these people men are wounded by their mothers just like little girls are...women are wounded by their fathers. And what has to happen is that they each have to realize what they are doing is trying to avoid intimacy. And they need to approach each other and recognize what the behaviors are the...the purpose of these behaviors is to push the other person away. And they have to recognize that and work together to resolve that if that's what they want to do, if they want to really have a relationship. Working a lot less drama. Find a woman who has a healthy relationship with her father(Yes)and a man who has a healthy relationship with his mother.
That's it. That's it.
All right, now we have settled that. Thanks so much for coming. Bye.
Exercises
1 Watch the video and answer the following questions.
1) Why does Dr. Carole Lieberman think it’s an addiction for women to l ove bad boys?
It’s an addiction because most women dabble or experiment with bad boys just like people experiment with drugs.
2) What does Dr. Carole Lieberman say about people’s feelings with drugs?
The craving, the high and the crash.
3) What does the anchorwoman mean by saying that the women who love bad boys are just crave drama in their lives?
They get easily bored so they want kind of an emotional roller-coaster.
4) What would little girls do when they are between the ages of 2 to 7 approximately?
When little girls are between the ages of 2 to 7 approximately, they try to get their father(s) away from their mother(s).
5) What kind of fathers can have “disfunctional relationships” with their daughter?
Fathers who are absent, who are too seductive with the girl, and who are abusive
6) What’s the suggestion given in the end of the talk show?
Find a woman who has a healthy relationship with her father and a man who has a healthy relationship with his mother.
2 Fill in the Blanks
There are a lot of women and an increasing number of women who actually become addicted to the high, to the pursuit the high drama pursuit of the boy, of the man.
They have rescue fantasies and what they don't get is really the man knows to get out sooner than the woman. The woman will hang in there until she's really brokenhearted. And the man would either leave or he will do behaviors that will make the woman push him away.
Clip four
Leave Out All the Rest
Cultural Tips
1. Linkin Park
Linkin Park is an American rock band from Agoura Hills, California. Formed in 1996, the band rose to international fame with their debut album, Hybrid Theory, which was certified Diamond by the RIAA in 2005 and multi-platinum in several other countries. Its following studio album, Meteora, continued the band's success, topping the Billboard 200 album chart in 2003, and was followed by extensive touring and charity work around the world. In 2003, MTV2 named Linkin Park the sixth greatest band of the music video era and the third best of the new millennium behind Oasis and Coldplay. Billboard ranked Linkin Park #19 on the Best Artists of the Decade chart. Having adapted the nu metal and rap metal genres to a radio-friendly yet densely layered style in Hybrid Theory and Meteora, the band explored other genres in their next studio album, Minutes to Midnight, which was released in 2007. The album topped the Billboard charts and had the third best debut week of any album that year. The band has collaborated with several other artists most notably with rapper Jay-Z in their mashup EP Collision Course, and many others included on Reanimation. The band's most recent work, the concept album A Thousand Suns, was released on September 8, 2010. Linkin Park has sold over 50 million albums worldwide and has won two Grammy Awards.
2) Twilight
Twilight is a young-adult vampire-romance novel by author Stephenie Meyer. It is the first book of theTwilight Series, and introduces seventeen-year-old Isabella "Bella" Swan, who finds her life in danger when she falls in love with a vampire, Edward Cullen. The novel is followed by New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn. It became an instant bestseller when published originally in hardback in 2005, debuting at No. 5 on the New York Times Best Seller list within a month of its release and later peaking at No. 1. the same year. Twilight was named one of Publishers Weekly's Best Children's Books of 2005. The novel was also the biggest selling book of 2008 and the second biggest selling of 2009, only behind its sequel New Moon. It has been translated into 37 different languages.
A film adaptation of Twilight was released in 2008. It was a commercial success, grossing more than $392
million worldwide and an additional $157 million from North American DVD sales, as of July 2009.
New Words & Expressions
resent愤慨;怨恨shed 流出;散发;放射,去除,吐露
Exercises
Fill in the blanks
I dreamed I was missing, you were so scared
But no one would listen, cause no one else cared
After my dreaming , I woke with this fear
What am I leaving when I'm done here?
So if you're asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
And don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory , and leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating , I've shed what I've near
I'm strong on the surface , not all the way through
I've never been perfect , but neither have you
So if you're asking me, I want you to know
When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest
Forgetting all the hurt inside that you've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
Forgetting all the hurt inside you've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are。