著名脱口秀主持人艾伦_德詹尼丝杜兰大学毕业英语演讲稿

著名脱口秀主持人艾伦•德詹尼丝杜兰大

学毕业英语演讲稿

Thank you, President Cowan, Mrs. President Cowen; distinguished guests, undistinguishedguests you know who you are, honored faculty and creepy Spanish teacher.

谢谢，谢谢考恩校长，和有头有脸的来宾们，呃，有头有脸的来宾，你知道你是谁，不用介绍了（众人笑），诚心感谢大家……以及讨厌的西班牙语老师（众人大笑）

And thank you to all the graduating class of 2019,

I realize most of you are hungover and havesplitting headaches and haven't slept since Fat Tuesday, but you can't graduate 'til I finish, solisten up.

感谢所有2019届的毕业生，我知道你们绝大多数人还因为宿醉头痛欲裂，狂欢到今天都还没睡，但是没听完我的演讲不能毕业，所以都听好了

!（学生们欢呼）

When I was asked to make the commencement speech,

I immediately said yes. Then I wentto look up what commencementmeant. Which would have been easy if I had a dictionary, butmost of the books in our house are

Portia's, and they're all written in Australian. So I had tobreak the word down myself, to find out the meaning.

当我被问是否来参加毕业典礼演讲的时候，我立刻就回答了：

yes!……然后我才去查“毕业典礼”是什么意思（众人笑）。如果我有字典的话就轻松多了，但我家的书大多是portia 的（ellen 的妻子，澳大利亚人）而且都是澳洲文（众

人笑），所以……我得自己摸索，去找出这个词的意思。

Commencement: common, and cement. Common cement. You commonly see cement onsidewalks. Sidewalks have cracks, and if you step on a crack, you break your mother's back. Sothere's that. But rm honored that you've asked me here to speak at your common cement.

“commencement毕业典礼” ：commen常见的+cement 水泥，常见的水泥（众人大笑）你常常见到水泥，在人行道上，人行道有裂缝，你要是踩到裂缝，就会撞伤你妈妈的背（大家笑），所以大概意思就是这样了（笑声）

I thought that you had to be a famous alumnus alumini aluminum alumis you had tograduate from this school. And I didn't go to college here, and I don't know if President Cowanknows, I didn't go to any college at all. Any college. And rm not saying you wasted your time,or money, but look at me, I"m a huge celebrity.

但我很荣幸被邀请来做你们的“常见的水泥”的演讲。我以为非得是又有名，又是你们学校的校友才能来……我没

有在这里念过大学，我不知校长先生是否知道，我完全没上过大学…任何一间大学！我倒不是在说你们在浪费时间和金钱，不过看看我，我是个超级成功的大名人唉!（大家爆笑）Although I did graduate from the school of hard knocks, our mascot was the knockers. I spent alot of time here growing up. My mom worked at （估计是某家

商店的名字）and I would go thereevery time I needed to steal something out of her purse. But why amI here today Clearly notto steal, you're too far away and rd never get away with it.

事实上我在这里度过许多成长的岁月，我妈妈在这里工作时，我常来找她.................. 每当我要偷她钱包里的钱时（大家笑）

但我今天在这里的原因，显然不是要偷你们的钱……

rm here because of you. Because I can't think of a more tenacious, more courageousgraduating class. I mean, look at you all, wearing your robes. Usually when you're wearing arobe at 10 in the morning, it means you've given up. I'm here because I love New Orleans. Iwas born and raised here, I spent my formative years here, and like you, while I was living hereI only did laundry six times.

我在这里是因为你们，因为没有比你们更优秀更勇敢的