小学英语笑话-校园幽默四则

合集下载

少儿英文小笑话大全爆笑

少儿英文小笑话大全爆笑

少儿英文小笑话大全爆笑幽默与笑话同是社会交往活动中不可缺少的交际手段。

下面是店铺精心收集的爆笑少儿英文小笑话,希望大家喜欢!爆笑少儿英文小笑话篇一A philosophy professor warned the classhe wasgoing to give them a test.一位哲学教授通知学生他要举行一场考试。

When the day came he entered theclassroom,wordlessly placed his chair on the tableand,turning to the blackboard, wrote, 考试那天,他走进教室,一言不发地把自己的椅子放到讲台上,然后转身在黑板上写道,"Prove to me this chair does not exist."“请向我证明这张椅子不存在。

”Most of the nervous studentbegan intently scribbling out long dissertations.大多数学生很紧张,都开始专心地写他们的论文。

But one member of the class wrote down just two words,and then handed his paper to theteacher.只有一个学生只写了两个单词就交卷了。

The professor had to smile when he read the student's answer:"What chair?"当教授看到这个学生的答案时,不由微笑了,只见他写的是:“什么椅子啊?”爆笑少儿英文小笑话篇二A big burly man visited the pastor's homeand askedto see the minister's wife,a woman well known forher charitable impulses.一个高大魁梧的男人到牧师家拜访,他要求会见牧师的妻子,这是一个以有着慈悲心肠而闻名的妇女。

校园幽默笑话英文版本

校园幽默笑话英文版本

校园幽默笑话英文版本民间笑话是喜剧性很强的故事。

刘勰在《文心雕龙·谐隐》中说:笑话可以“振危释惫”,起讽刺和娱乐作用。

下面是店铺带来的校园幽默笑话英文版,欢迎阅读!校园幽默笑话英文版篇一Answer The Puzzle解答难题One day,the teacher walked into her classroom and announced to the class that on each Friday,she will ask a question of the class and anyone who answers correctly doesn't have to go to school the following Monday.老师走进教室,向同学们宣布说,以后每星期五她都会问大家一个问题,谁答对了下星期一就不用上课。

One the first Friday,the teacher asked,"how many grains of san d are there on the beach?”Needless to say,no one could answer.The following Friday, the teacher asks the class,“How many stars are there in the sky?”and no one could answer.第一个星期五,老师问:“沙滩上有多少粒沙子?”不用说,没人答得上来。

第二个星期五,老师问:‘天上有多少颗星星?”还是没人答得上来。

Frustrated,little Johnny decided that the next Friday,he would somehow answer the question and get a three-day weekend. So on Thursday night, Johnny took two ping一gong balls and painted them black. The next day, he brought them to school in a paper bag. At the end of the day,just when the teacher said,"here’s this weekend’s question,"Johnny emptied the bag to floor,sending the ping一pong balls rolling to the front of the room.小强尼沮丧极了,他决定下星期五设法回答出老师的问题,过一次连续三天的周末。

【小学的简单的英语笑话】最简单的英语笑话

【小学的简单的英语笑话】最简单的英语笑话

【小学的简单的英语笑话】最简单的英语笑话幽默与笑话同是社会交往活动中不可缺少的交际手段,探索幽默与笑话的区别,认为有意与无意、含蓄与直白、复杂与简单、创新与故旧是区分幽默与笑话的重要标准。

下面是本文库带来的小学的简单的英语笑话,欢迎阅读!小学的简单的英语笑话篇一顾全面子Once there was a scholar who was very poor,but was very much concerned with his reputation. One evening,a thief broke into the scholar’s house,but he could find nothing worth stealing. So he said,”What bad lucky Ihave hit upon a real beggars"Hearing this,the scholar fished out little money he had from his bed head,and went after the thief. He stopped the thief and whispered to him,”You come at a most inopportune time. Would you please make do with this little money2 But for Heaven’s sake don’t talk about it in front of anyone else.By all means leave me a little face,eh?"从前有个读书人家里很穷,却很爱面子。

一天晚上,小偷到他家来行窃,却没有东西值得一偷,就说:"晦气,我算碰到真正的穷鬼了!"读书人听见了,就从床头摸出仅有的几文钱,追上去拦住小偷,轻轻地说:"你来得真不巧。

关于小学的英语笑话大全

关于小学的英语笑话大全

关于小学的英语笑话大全笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。

本文是关于小学的英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!关于小学的英语笑话篇一“I'm sorry ,Madam ,but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”“Twenty d ollars! Why ,I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”“Yes,but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”“对不起,夫人,为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。

”“20美元!为什么?不是说好只要4美元。

”“是的,但是你的孩子大喊大叫,把另外四个病人吓跑了。

”关于小学的英语笑话篇二Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."它们是从美国直接带来的一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。

学生英语笑话大全笑破你的肚子的笑话

学生英语笑话大全笑破你的肚子的笑话

学生英语笑话大全笑破你的肚子的笑话多看可以帮助我们提高英文阅读能力的哦,下面一起来看看带翻译的英语笑话,希望你喜欢。

1.Are you kidding me?你豁老子哦?2.Dude.哥佬倌3.Long time no see.死哪儿切了喃?那么久没qio到你了。

4.What?啥子喃?5.Don"t worry。

虚啥子啊虚。

6.What do you want?你要爪子嘛?7.I can not hold no longer.老子遭不住了。

8.Stupid.瓜娃子。

9.She"s my girlfriend;wife.她是我老妞儿。

10.You are wele.莫来头;说这些。

11.That"s awesome.简直巴适的板。

12.I have no idea.晓求不得。

13.A little.就那么滴滴儿。

14.I am sure.我呸死了。

打包票。

15.What happened?啥子情况啥子情况?16.It doesn"t make sense. 球名堂莫得。

17.It"s none of your business.管你娃球事啊?18.What a hell? 浪么子搞起在勒。

19.Are you sure.儿豁??20.Are u out of ur mind?你吃醉了所?21.Rock paper scissors. 石千儿。

22.I dont care.管我屁事啊。

23.Kick your ass. 给你娃儿两脚头哦。

24.Dark black。

黢嘛黑。

25.See you.空了吹。

26.Let"s go.撤飘。

27.Shut up.闹啥子。

28.Asshole.斯娃子29.You wanna piece of me.老子给你打燃火。

30.Enjoy!敞欢。

31.I got no money.老子分儿都不分儿了A man went to see his doctor有一名男子去看他的医生,because he was suffering from a miserable cold.因为他正遭到令人难受的感冒之苦。

英语小幽默笑话

英语小幽默笑话

英语小幽默笑话一、教室里的笑话一天,小明走进教室,发现黑板上写着一行字:“I'm very good!(我很好!)”于是他皱了皱眉,拿起粉笔在旁边写了一行字:“I'm good too, thank you!(我也很好,谢谢!)”当小明坐下时,他才发现旁边的黑板上写着:“I'm a blackboard!(我是一个黑板!)”二、动物园里的笑话John 去动物园里参观。

他走到狮子旁边,然后用手指挖狮子笼子外面一点点的土。

突然,狮子怒吼一声,跳到笼子外面。

John 吓得立刻跑了起来。

然而,狮子并没有追赶他,反而开始用爪子挖土,好像在等待什么。

John 一边跑一边回头看,这时突然明白过来,原来狮子是在等着他掏出足够多的土,这样狮子就可以把他的手指当早餐了。

三、医院里的笑话将军身体不适,于是他去了医院。

医生给将军把脉后说:“将军,您需要多休息,少工作。

”将军愤怒地说:“我是将军,我必须站在最前线,为国家效力!”医生点点头,继续说道:“我明白了,将军。

那么我们就把床移到最前线吧!”四、旅行的笑话一个美国人,一个英国人和一个中国人一起参加了一个环球旅行团。

当他们来到一个孤岛时,他们被困在那里了。

他们决定每人去找各自国家的救援。

一个月后,美国人挨饿了,但看到了一点希望。

他用信号枪向天空发出了SOS。

几天后,一架直升飞机来把他救走了。

两个月后,英国人饿得快死了,但他坚信救援一定会来。

于是他写了一封希望的信并抛入大海。

几天后,一个军舰把他救了起来。

而中国人一直没有食物,他只好靠椰子充饥。

六个月后,他终于爬到了岛的最高峰,大喊一声:“我是第一批到达这个岛屿的人!”五、餐厅里的笑话一位顾客走进餐厅,服务员领他坐下,然后递给他菜单。

一会儿,服务员走过来问:“先生,您想点什么?”顾客犹豫了一下,然后说道:“给我请一个有人性的厨师。

”服务员笑笑,离开了。

等了一会儿,服务员回来了,手上端着一个镜子。

他把镜子递给顾客说:“先生,这是我们厨师的倒影。

英语幽默笑话集锦

英语幽默笑话集锦

英语幽默笑话集锦笑话1:鸡蛋的问题小明问小华:“你怎么知道一个鸡蛋是生的还是熟的?”小华:“很简单,我把鸡蛋放进水里,如果浮起来就是生的,如果沉下去就是熟的。

”小明:“那如果鸡蛋半浮半沉呢?”小华:“那就是半生不熟。

”笑话2:打电话小明用英语给外国朋友打电话:“Hello! Is it Mr. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友说:“I’m sorry, you have the wrong number.”小明再打一次:“Hello! Is it Mrs. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友愤怒地说:“No, I told you already, you have the wrong number!”小明再打一次:“Hello! Is it Mr. Brown’s residence?”外国朋友非常生气:“I can’t believe you called me again! This is not Mr. Brown’s residence!”小明笑着说:“I know, but I just love hearing you say it!”笑话3:父亲的损失小明的父亲对他说:“小明,你知道我为什么戴假发吗?”小明好奇地问:“为什么呢?”父亲严肃地回答:“因为我是个有发言权的人。

”笑话4:天堂和地狱有一天,人们来到上帝面前询问天堂和地狱的存在。

他们问上帝:“天堂和地狱是什么样子的?”上帝微笑着回答:“我带你们去看一看。

”首先,上帝打开了通向地狱的门。

门一打开,他们看到里面是一个宴会厅,摆满了美食和饮料,但每个人手中都拿着又长又粗的筷子,无法把食物送入嘴中。

接着,上帝带着他们去了天堂。

天堂的门打开后,他们看到了和地狱一样的情景,宴会厅里也是美食和饮料满满,每个人同样手中拿着又长又粗的筷子。

但人们却高兴地吃得很满足,因为在天堂里,他们都学会了相互喂食。

笑话5:自动售货机小明走到一个自动售货机前,看见上面写着:“请用英语选择您要购买的商品。

英语笑话简单易懂爆笑

英语笑话简单易懂爆笑

英语笑话简单易懂爆笑1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. 老师:谁能回到我下一个问题,谁就可以回家了。

One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。

Teacher: who just threw that?老师:谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩:我!我现在要回家了。

2、What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高?Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗,大楼又跳不起来。

3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾,但是没有身体?A coin!硬币。

4、What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛,却看不见?A needle.针。

5、Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子:你会怎么形容我呢?Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫:ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子:那是什么意思?Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."丈夫:迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。

Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子:哇,谢谢,但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫:开个玩笑!。

小学三年级英语笑话大全

小学三年级英语笑话大全

小学三年级英语笑话大全冷笑话的主要应用群体是熟悉网络的平民、青年、学生、白领等,他们具备熟练的网络技能、很强的接受新事物的能力以及开拓创新的精神。

下面是店铺带来的小学三年级英语笑话,欢迎阅读!小学三年级英语笑话篇一Where is the egg?Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.Teacher:Then where is the “egg"?Student:In the cake,Sir.鸡蛋在哪里?老师:你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗?学生:可以。

我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。

老师:“鸡蛋”在哪?学生:在蛋糕里,先生小学三年级英语笑话篇二Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket. But a girl asks him,“Why do you buy so many tickets? How many friends do you meet?” “No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.”汤姆是个小孩,他才7岁。

简单易懂的小学英语笑话

简单易懂的小学英语笑话

简单易懂的小学英语笑话冷笑话不同于一般的笑话,以其独特的制笑机制,能瞬间制造出一种特殊氛围。

小编精心收集了简单易懂的小学英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!简单易懂的小学英语笑话篇一“Clever”doctor 聪明的大夫As a doctor is examining a patient, his nurse bursts in and says”Excuse me,but that man you just treated walked out of the door and collapsed on the front step. What should I do?"大夫正为一个病人做检查时,她的护士闯了进来说:“请原谅,刚才在您这儿看病的那位病人出门时摔在前面的台阶上了,我该怎么办呢?”"Turn him around,"the doctor answered,"So it looks like he was walking in.”大夫回答:“给他转个身,这样,别人看起来会以为他是正往里走。

”简单易懂的小学英语笑话篇二A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards.一个小男孩上了公交车,坐在一位正在读书的男人旁边,他注意到这个男人的衣领朝里翻。

The little boy asked why he wore his collar that way. The man, who was a priest, said,小男孩问这个男人为什么他这样弄他的衣领,这位牧师回答道,"I am a Father."“我是一个父亲”The little boy replied, "My daddy doesn't wear his collar like that."小男孩回应道,“我的爸爸可不那样整衣领。

与英语有关的笑话

与英语有关的笑话

与英语有关的笑话笑话一:英语考试的难题有一天,小明参加了英语考试。

考试题目非常难,根本不知道如何下手。

小明看着试卷上的第一道题,上面写着:“请用英语翻译下面的句子:‘我的猫在屋子里睡觉’。

”他想了一会儿,终于决定回答:“My cat sleeps in the room.” 结果,他错了!笑话二:拼写错误的尴尬在一个英语课上,老师问小明:“请你在黑板上拼写‘电视’这个单词。

”小明听到后,自信满满地上前去写。

他认真地写下了“T-E-L-E-V-S-I-O-N”这个单词。

全班爆发出一阵笑声,可是小明却不明白大家在笑什么。

笑话三:英语学习的困惑小李正在学习英语的时候碰到了一个很难理解的词汇 - "heteronym"(同音异形词)。

他询问了老师,老师解释说:“就是不同的单词拼写相同但读音和意思不同。

”小李听后恍然大悟,他说:“噢,你的意思是‘homonym’(同音同形词)吧!”老师苦笑着点了点头。

笑话四:音标的误解小红正在努力学习英语的发音。

有一天,她看到一个生词“schedule”(日程表),但不知道它的正确读音。

她问了很多人,但得到的回答都不尽相同。

最终,她决定向老师请教。

老师在她的本子上写下了正确的发音:“/ˈʃɛd.juːl/”,小红看了之后茅塞顿开,满怀信心地说:“哦,看来它读作'sked-yule'。

”笑话五:语法解释的幽默小明在英语课上学习了形容词的比较级和最高级。

他灵机一动,想到了一个搞笑的问题:“老师,如果'good'的比较级是'better',那最高级是不是'bester'?”全班哄然大笑,而小明尴尬地明白了自己的错误。

笑话六:难以理解的字母顺序小张学习英语的时候遇到了一个难题,他对于字母表的顺序感到困惑。

他问了老师:“老师,为什么字母表中U和I的顺序不是按照字母表顺序排列的?”老师微笑着回答:“因为UI是一个表情符号,表示‘你和我’。

4年级小学英语笑话带翻译 1500字

4年级小学英语笑话带翻译 1500字

4年级小学英语笑话带翻译 1500字一、Why Did the Tomato Turn Red? 番茄为什么变红了?Tom : Mom, why did the tomato turn red?Tom的妈妈,“妈妈,为什么番茄变红了?”Mom : Well, it saw the salad dressing!妈妈:嗯,它看见沙拉酱了!解释:这个笑话是一个简单的文字游戏。

番茄变红是因为它看到了沙拉酱,也就是“saw the salad dressing”的谐音”sauce the salad dressing”,以此制造了一个幽默的场景。

这个笑话适合小学四年级的学生,因为他们开始学习英语的幽默。

二、A Bike Ride 骑自行车Teacher : Did you enjoy your bike ride?老师:你喜欢骑自行车吗?Student : No, I didn't. The seat was too hard.学生:不喜欢。

座位太硬了。

解释:这个笑话很简单,是通过一种双关语的形式制造幽默。

老师问学生是否喜欢骑自行车,学生以为老师是指自行车骑行,但实际上老师指的是骑在自行车的座位上。

学生的回答让笑话产生了可笑的效果。

三、The Camping Trip 露营之旅Teacher : Did you have a good time on the camping trip?老师:露营之旅过得开心吗?Student : It was in-tents!学生:每一帐篷里都有数百只虫子!解释:这个笑话是一个多音字的游戏。

学生理解露营之旅(camping trip)为每一帐篷里都有数百只虫子的意思(in-tents),而露营之旅(camping trip)音近“in-tents”。

这使得回答变得幽默有趣。

四、The Time Question 关于时间的问题Teacher : What time do you go to bed?老师:你几点睡觉?Student : Usually about 10 o'clock, but sometimes 10:30.学生:通常是10点左右,但有时是10点半。

小学生校园笑话500则【关于校园英文小笑话阅读】

小学生校园笑话500则【关于校园英文小笑话阅读】

小学生校园笑话500则【关于校园英文小笑话阅读】笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。

小编精心收集了关于校园英文小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!关于校园英文小笑话篇1In order to prove the harmful effect of alcohol,the teacher put a bug into a glass filled withalcohol, soon the bug teacher asked a student, “What does this show?”The studentanswered, “It shows that people won’t get parasites if they drink more alcohol.”为了证明酒精对生物的危害,老师把一只虫子放入装有酒精的杯子里,虫子很快就死了。

老师问一个学生:“这说明了什么?”学生答道:“说明人多喝酒,就不会长虫子。

”关于校园英文小笑话篇25-year-old daughter, wanting her father to help her d o : “I’m so tired, if youpraise me, I’ll Be fresh.”Daughter: “Lao Zheng!”Dad: “Hey!”Daughter: “Your chick looks reallynice ah ......”5岁的女儿让老爸帮她做某事。

老爸:“爸爸很累啦,你夸我两句吧,你夸我两句我就又有劲了。

”女儿:“老郑!”老爸:“哎!”女儿:“你家妞妞长得可真漂亮啊……”关于校园英文小笑话篇3Husband: Did you sew the button on my shirt, darling?丈夫:你给我把扣子缝好了吗,亲爱的?Wife: No, dear. I couldn’t find the button, so I just sewed up the buttonhole.妻子:没有,亲爱的。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短关于校园英语笑话对话篇1服务员,我汤里有只苍蝇!不是,先生,那是蟑螂,苍蝇在你牛排里。

Waiter,there'aflyinmyoup!Noir,that'acockroach,theflyionyourteak.关于校园英语笑话对话篇2服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!别让别人看见,先生,要不别人都要。

Waiter,there'aflyinmyoup!Keepitdownir,orthey'llallbewantingone.关于校园英语笑话对话篇3服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!对不起,先生,我弄走那三个时忘了这个。

Waiter,thereiaflyinmyoup!Sorryir,maybeI'veforgottenitwhenIremovedtheotherthree.关于校园英语笑话对话篇4服务员,汤里有只死苍蝇!是的,先生,是开水杀死了它们。

Waiter,there'adeadflyinmyoup!Yeir,it'thehotwaterthatkillthem.关于校园英语笑话对话篇5服务员,来杯咖啡,不加奶油。

对不起,先生,奶油没了,不加奶怎么样Waiter,I'dlikeacupofcoffee,pleae,withnocream.I'morry,ir,butwe'reoutofcream.Howaboutwithnomilk 关于校园英语笑话对话篇6服务员,你的领带在我的汤里了。

没关系,先生,它不缩水。

Waiter,yourtieiinmyoup!That'allright,ir,it'nothrinkable.关于校园英语笑话对话篇7服务员,汤里有只蜜蜂!是的,先生,今天苍蝇放假。

Waiter,waiter,there'abeeinmyoup.YeSir,it'thefly'dayoff.关于校园英语笑话对话篇8LittleRobertakedhimotherfortwocent.小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

关于爆笑的校园英语笑话超搞笑的

关于爆笑的校园英语笑话超搞笑的

关于爆笑的校园英语笑话超搞笑的关于爆笑的校园英语笑话超搞笑的笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。

本文是关于爆笑的校园英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!关于爆笑的校园英语笑话:A Nail Or A Fly?钉子还是苍蝇?An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor.一位视力正在衰退的老绅士住进了一家旅馆的客房。

他双手各拿一瓶酒。

在墙上有只苍蝇,他误以为是枚钉子。

他把两只瓶子朝上一挂,瓶子掉下来摔碎了,酒洒了一地。

When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him anddecided to do him a favour.一个女服务员发现发生的事情以后,对他深表同情,决定帮他个忙。

So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed.于是,第二天早上他到楼顶花园散步时,她把一枚钉子钉在了苍蝇停过的地方。

Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adnslapped it with all his strength.这里,老人回到了房里。

小学生简单英语笑话

小学生简单英语笑话

⼩学⽣简单英语笑话⼩学⽣简单英语笑话 你知道学些笑话的'好处么?当第⼀次见⾯的时候,总是有不知道该说什么的尴尬,这时候你就需要⼀些笑话,来缓解⼀下⽓氛呢,这⾥⼩编为你收集整理了⼩学⽣简单英语笑话,希望能对你有所帮助哈! ⼩学⽣简单英语笑话篇⼀:Helicopter Lessons A blonde received a certificate for helicopter flying lessons for her birthday. One day she was bored and decided to take advantage of the opportunity. When she arrived at the place, the man said "Well, there's only one helicopter here, and it only has one seat, if I show you how to do it, do you mind going up solo?" "Oh of course! I can handle it" the blonde replied. Well, he showed her the inner-workings of the helicopter and sent her on her way, only asking that she radio in every 400ft. just to make sure everything was going smoothly. at 400ft, she radioed in saying "wow! this is so much fun!" At 800 ft. She radioed in again saying "this is pretty easy, I can do this all day!" At 1200 ft. She didnt. he waited and waited, and didn't hear from the blonde! seconds later he heard a crash in the field next to the station. He ran out to see what happened, the blonde crashed! Luckily she survived, "what happened?" he exclaimed. "Well, I was doing fine, but, I started to get cold, so I just turned off the big fan!" ⼩学⽣简单英语笑话篇⼆:New Ceo Means Business A company, feeling it was time for a shake-up, hires a new CEO. This new boss is determinedto rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. The room is full of workers and he wants to let them know he means business! The CEO walks up to the guy and asks, "And how much money do you make a week?" A little surprised, the young fellow looks at him and replies, "I make $300.00 a week. Why?" The CEO then hands the guy $1,200 in cash and screams, "Here's four weeks pay, now GET OUT and don't come back!" Feeling pretty good about his first firing, the CEO looks around the room and asks, "Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-off did here?" With a sheepish grin, one of the other workers mutters, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's. ⼩学⽣简单英语笑话篇三:Fire Escape A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde escape a burning building by climbing to the roof. Firemen are on the street below, holding a blanket for them to jump in. The firemen yell to the Brunette, "Jump! Jump! It's your only chance to survive!" The Brunette jumps and SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away...the Brunette slams into the sidewalk like a tomato. "C'mon! Jump! You gotta jump!' say the firemen to the Redhead. "Oh no! You're gonna pull the blanket away!" says the Redhead. "No! It's Brunettes we can't stand! We're OK with Redheads!" "OK" says the Redhead, and she jumps. SWISH! The firemen yank the blanket away, and the lady is flattened on the pavement like a pancake. Finally, the Blonde steps to the edge of the roof. Again, the firemen yell "Jump! You have to jump!" "No way! You're just gonna pull the blanket away!" yelled the Blonde. "No! Really! You have to jump! We won't pull the blanket away!" "Look," the Blonde says. "Nothing you say is gonna convince me that you're not gonna pull the blanket away! So what I want you to do is put the blanket down, and back away from it...." ⼩学⽣简单英语笑话篇四:I'll Die A blonde goes into the beauty and hair parlor with her walkman on her head. "I need to take that walkman off your head," says the beauty specialist as she notices the blonde. "You can't! I'll die!" retorts the blonde. "I can't cut your hair with the walkman on your ears!" says the beauty specialist getting annoyed. "I said you can't take it off, or I'll die!" The beauty specialist, outraged and flustered, grabs the walkman and throws it off the head of the blonde. Within seconds, the blonde dies. When the specialist picks up the walkman to listen, she hears it repeating "breath in, breath out, breath in".您可能感兴趣的⽂章:【⼩学⽣简单英语笑话】相关⽂章:09-1205-1611-1911-0801-1401-1112-2612-2212-20。

  1. 1、下载文档前请自行甄别文档内容的完整性,平台不提供额外的编辑、内容补充、找答案等附加服务。
  2. 2、"仅部分预览"的文档,不可在线预览部分如存在完整性等问题,可反馈申请退款(可完整预览的文档不适用该条件!)。
  3. 3、如文档侵犯您的权益,请联系客服反馈,我们会尽快为您处理(人工客服工作时间:9:00-18:30)。

小学英语笑话:校园幽默四则
1.
Two Birds
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。

谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。

老师:请说说看。

学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

2.
The Fish Net
Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?
A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.
鱼网
你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安?老师发问道。

把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

小女孩回答道。

3.
The New Teacher
George comes from school on the first of September.
George, how did you like your new teacher? asked his mother.
I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said
that two and four were six too.....
新老师
9月1日,乔治放学回到家里。

乔治,你喜欢你们的新老师吗?妈妈问。

妈妈,我不喜欢,因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。

4.
A physics Examination
Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls? Nick's answer: Because our eyes are before ears.
一次物理考试
在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。

这个问题是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声?
尼克的回答是:因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后。

直播聚合 直播聚合峨孞尛。

相关文档
最新文档