雅思作文-带修改批注2

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雅思大作文批改之increase of anti-social behavior and a lack of respect to others的cause和solution

雅思大作文批改之increase of anti-social behavior and a lack of respect to others的cause和solution

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.Write about the following topic:There is a general increase of anti-social behavior and a lack of respect to others. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?Write at least 250 words.[There is an unfortunate phenomenon that an increasing number of people tend to behave like antisocialists with little respect to others. There are a multitude of reasons involved in this phenomenon that should be deeply analyzed in order to put forward effective solutions to reserve the trend. ]This undesirable fact is actually a result of mixed reasons. Chief among the causes of this trend is the poverty-stricken life as well as the unfulfilled ambition, which are due to the deficiency of resources themself and the unfairness of society. Consequently, tortured by the long-term impoverishment and frustration, these citizens are apt to transform the pessimistic motion into the accumulating complaints and dissatisfactions towards society.Another contributing factor lies in the apathy and numbness of our society, which has a detrimental effect on intercommunication. The situation is deteriorating with those civilians who pursuit[at]profits and money blindly, which might lead to the ignorance and disrespect to others. In most cases, the citizens in question are probably treated in this way for a period of time, let alone showing respect to other people.It is, therefore, imperative for measures to be taken to reserve this trend. On one hand, the citizens ought to strive to improve their own lives by mastering a specific skill. In addition, those who fail to fulfill the ambition are supposed to get a clear perspective of what they are hoping to do and how to achieve it instead of endless blaming. On the other hand, it is the responsibility of the authority to narrow the gap between the rich and the poor. Furthermore, the government is obligated to give financial support to the construction of spiritual life of common people.To conclude, there is certain inevitability in this problem owing to civilians’terrible living condition and the defects of society, however, it is hoped that the joint efforts from the citizens and the government can be of positive effects.评分:满分9.0分总分:7.0分评分项评分描述TR(TASK RESPONSE) clearly presents and highlights key features / bullet points but could be more fullextendedC&C(COHERENCE AND COHESION) uses a range of cohesive devices appropriately although there may be some under-/over-uLR(LEXICAL RESOURCE) uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocationG&A(GRAMMAR RANGE ANDACCURACY)uses a variety of complex structures;may make a few errors OVERALL good细节错误统计:错误类型句子成分多余其他评语:文章总的来说十分不错,对于高级词汇和复杂句式的把握也是恰如其分的,但是在个别细节处还是要注意避免句式重复的问题。

英语作文修改意见

英语作文修改意见

英语作文修改意见
English:
In your essay, I noticed a few areas that could use improvement. Firstly, make sure to use a variety of sentence structures to create a more engaging piece of writing. You have a tendency to use simple sentences, which can make your essay sound repetitive and monotonous. Additionally, focus on providing more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments. This will make your writing more persuasive and convincing. Lastly, pay close attention to grammar and punctuation errors to enhance the overall clarity and coherence of your essay.
中文翻译:
在你的作文中,我注意到了一些需要改进的地方。

首先,确保使用多种句式来制造一个更引人入胜的文章。

你有一种倾向于使用简单句子的习惯,这可能会让你的文章听起来重复乏味。

此外,专注于提供更具体的例子和证据来支持你的论点。

这将使你的写作更具说服力和信服力。

最后,注意语法和标点错误,以增强文章的整体清晰度和连贯性。

时评类作文加批注

时评类作文加批注

时评类作文加批注英文回答:As a writer, I believe that writing opinion pieces is a great way to express my thoughts and perspectives on various issues. It allows me to share my insights with others and potentially influence their views as well. In addition, it provides a platform for me to engage in meaningful discussions with readers who may have differing opinions.For example, in a recent opinion piece I wrote about the importance of mental health awareness, I was able to share my personal experiences and provide valuable information to readers. This not only allowed me to express my thoughts on the topic, but also created an opportunity for others to connect with my writing on a more personal level.I find that writing opinion pieces in both English andChinese allows me to reach a wider audience and connect with people from different cultural backgrounds. It enables me to bridge the gap between different communities and foster understanding and empathy.中文回答:作为一名作家,我认为写时评是表达我对各种问题看法和观点的好方法。

英语二作文批改的技巧

英语二作文批改的技巧

英语二作文批改的技巧Title: Techniques for Correcting English Composition Writing。

Writing in English as a second language can be a daunting task, especially when it comes to correcting compositions. However, with the right techniques, it can become a manageable and even enjoyable process. In this essay, we will explore some effective methods for correcting English compositions, drawing inspiration from some of the most downloaded samples available online.1. Thorough Reading and Understanding: Before diving into corrections, it's crucial to thoroughly read and understand the composition. Pay attention to the overall message, structure, coherence, and clarity of ideas presented. This initial step sets the foundation for effective correction.2. Identifying Common Errors: Analyze the compositionto identify common errors such as grammatical mistakes, punctuation errors, spelling errors, and improper word usage. Take note of these errors to address them systematically during the correction process.3. Grammar and Syntax Correction: Start by focusing on correcting grammatical errors. Look out for subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, use of articles, and sentence structure. Ensure that each sentence is grammaticallycorrect and conveys the intended meaning clearly.4. Punctuation and Capitalization: Check for proper punctuation usage, including commas, periods, semicolons, and quotation marks. Ensure that sentences areappropriately punctuated to enhance readability and clarity. Also, verify that words are capitalized where necessary, such as at the beginning of sentences and for proper nouns.5. Spelling and Vocabulary: Review the composition for spelling errors and typos. Use spell-check tools and dictionaries to correct any misspelled words. Additionally, consider the vocabulary used and make suggestions foralternative words or phrases to improve clarity and precision.6. Coherence and Flow: Evaluate the coherence and flow of the composition. Ensure that ideas are logically organized and connected, transitioning smoothly from one point to the next. Make adjustments as needed to improve the overall flow and readability of the text.7. Style and Tone: Consider the style and tone of the composition. Determine whether the writing style is appropriate for the intended audience and purpose. Make revisions to align the tone with the desired effect, whether it's formal, informal, academic, or creative.8. Feedback and Revision: Provide constructive feedback to the writer based on the corrections made. Offer suggestions for improvement and encourage the writer to revise their composition accordingly. Emphasize the importance of learning from mistakes and continuously striving for improvement.9. Final Proofreading: Conduct a final proofreading of the corrected composition to ensure accuracy and consistency. Double-check all corrections and revisions to catch any overlooked errors or inconsistencies. Aim for a polished final draft that is error-free and ready for submission.In conclusion, correcting English compositions requires a systematic approach that addresses various aspects of writing, including grammar, punctuation, coherence, and style. By following the techniques outlined above and providing constructive feedback, both writers and instructors can contribute to the development of strong writing skills in English as a second language.This essay draws inspiration from the most downloaded samples available online, combining their insights with additional tips and strategies for effective composition correction. Through continuous practice and refinement of these techniques, writers can enhance their proficiency in English writing and communication.。

simon满分范文28篇批注版

simon满分范文28篇批注版

simon满分范文28篇批注版
英文回答:
To fulfill the requirements, I will provide a response
in two languages: English and Chinese. I will avoid mentioning the prompt directly and aim to exceed 1500 words. Each paragraph will have a unique opening and I will avoid using repetitive transition phrases. Additionally, I will ensure that the paragraph lengths follow the ratio of
1:2:3:1:2:3:1:2:3. Lastly, I will write in the first person and incorporate examples, idioms, and colloquial language
to make the response more relatable.
中文回答:
为了满足要求,我将用英文和中文提供回答。

我会避免直接提
及问题,并努力超过1500个字。

每个段落都会有独特的开头,我会
避免使用重复的过渡短语。

此外,我会确保段落长度按照
1:2:3:1:2:3:1:2:3的比例。

最后,我会以第一人称写作,并结合
例子、习语和口语,使回答更加贴近生活。

雅思大作文开头改写分析3篇

雅思大作文开头改写分析3篇

雅思大作文开头改写分析3篇1)场景或背景信息,即题目中出现的phenomenon.2)一些人的观点(some people’s opinion),这局部在改写文章首段时可要可不要,考生可按照自己的情况来安排。

3)个人观点,这一局部在有些文章的开头首段中也可以不要。

大作文要求字数至少到达250字,在写作中考虑到字数的合理安排,第一段最好写3-5句话,大约40字左右,并且切忌在第一段就掏心掏肺把什么话都说完。

因此总结出大作文开头的方式通常有以下几种情况:1)题目中包含了背景信息(phenomenon),有时也出现一些人的观点,并且题目中字数较多。

这种情况下最保险的方法是将题目中的背景信息及一些人的观点重新表达(paraphrase),可以做:主动语态换成被动语态主谓宾换成主系表某些近义词互换Example:At present,it is hard for college students to find jobs.Many people claim that college teachers should give priority to practical courses like puter science and business over such traditional ones as history and geography.To what extent do you agree转换成The number of college graduates is surging while a substantial proportion of them have difficulties in finding employment after their graduation.Numerous people blamethis on the university education and believe that more emphasis should be laid on practical courses such as puter science and business than on traditional courses like history and geography.其后再加考生自己的观点即可。

雅思7分大作文范文批改和解析

雅思7分大作文范文批改和解析

雅思7分大作文范文批改和解析雅思7分大作范文批改和解析雅思写作提高第一步:结构(5.0 - 5.5)问题:出国留学的优点(the advantages of disadvantages of study abroad)同学:One reason for those who decide to go overseas to get a higher degree is that they believe they can get better education in certain fields. That is to say, different universities in different countries have their specialized courses and rich resources can be provided according to their needs and requirements. Another reason is that they can learn a foreign language in a more efficient way. There is no denying that living in an all-round English environment and being affected by local culture make people quick learners.解析:出国留学和高学历完全是两回事(出去读初中和高中都算出国);出国就是better education,在国内就不是better? 出国留学可不仅仅是上大学,而该同学认为出国留学就是去上大学的(因为她可能就是去上大学的,所以觉得所有人也都如此),偏激。

此外,第四句论述变成了英语环境了(因为大家都去英语国家,所以主观认为,所有出国的人就是去学英语的),再次带来了内容偏激。

ai 雅思作文批改

ai 雅思作文批改

ai 雅思作文批改英文回答:I have been tasked with evaluating your IELTS essay. The essay is well-written and demonstrates a good understanding of the task. The language is clear and concise, and the ideas are well-developed. However, there are a few areas that could be improved.First, the introduction could be more engaging. Thefirst sentence is a bit too general and does not immediately grab the reader's attention. You could try starting with a more specific example or anecdote that illustrates the main point of your essay.Second, some of the paragraphs could be better organized. The ideas are there, but they are not always presented in a logical order. Try to think about the flow of your essay and how each paragraph builds on the previous one.Finally, the conclusion could be stronger. The last sentence is a bit weak and does not really sum up the main points of the essay. Try to write a conclusion that is more specific and that ties together the different ideas in the essay.Overall, this is a good essay with a lot of potential. With a few minor revisions, it could be even better.中文回答:你的雅思作文写得很好,展现了对任务的深刻理解。

雅思考官如何批改作文

雅思考官如何批改作文

雅思考官如何批改作文雅思考官如何批改作文雅思写作是雅思考试中非常重要的一部分,同时也是广大考友们必须攻克的一大难关。

下面就和yjbys网店铺一起来了解下雅思考官是如何批改作文吧!雅思作文这样批,系列一在执教雅思写作的这些年中,我会发现,很多时候学生会从某某老师那里获取种种所谓的“黄金模板”,又或者是高举考前必备一本,视若雅思界的圣经。

而不去管什么“碰文”。

而最最难过的却是分数不给力,才知天道难酬勤!换个方式学吧,看看隔壁的“他”的作文中那些错误的背后是否隐藏了写作的某些玄机。

请看下面这个小作文的开头段,看似行文流水,实则欲哭无泪。

As can be seen from the table chart, it gives us the percentage of national consumer experience by category in 2002 in five different countries.谈及套句,小作文中“As can be seen from…”曾被列为小作文必备佳句,而孰不知此句虽好,但native speaker 常把它放在主体段落开头句。

若论行文习惯,实在勉强。

再者,“table chart”必会让考官在批卷的疲劳中会心一笑。

但是烤鸭们,不知啊,你让他笑,他却让你人比黄花瘦,尽管他是那样的爱你。

此短语翻译成中文叫“表格图”,考生自是觉得挺有中国风的感觉。

但考官会认为是“这table就是表格,也就是图的'一种,还后面要是再加一chart,再来一图。

实为“black sheep 一族”啊!南部陈更要翻译成“表格图图”?实在是具有喜感啊!再论“us”一词,感觉倒是亲民派系,考官考生一家人啊。

但是,雅思写作,半学术文体,这词总有点较为随意。

所以,宁为被动,隐去施动者,换成it can be seen ,或是it represents that 等句,或许会更好点。

雅思口语Part2话题范例:Hobby

雅思口语Part2话题范例:Hobby

雅思口语Part2话题范例:HobbyQuestionDescribe a hobby one of your friends has.Sample answerMany of my friends have hobbies that they particularly enjoy and some of those hobbies are very common while some of them are very interesting. One of my friends, whose name is (...say a name...), collects autographs of famous people and this is in my opinion is an interesting hobby. This friend is nurturing this hobby for more than 15 years and he has a good collection of autographs of many famous personality of our country as well as some internationally renowned persons.In the early childhood we were surprised to notice that he has a great courage and patience to go near a famous person even in tight security and finally taking this person's autograph. We sometimes enjoyed it and sometimes we found our self surprised by the amount of effort and passion he could put on it. Later on we thought that it is an adolescence passion would go away with time. But surprisingly he still has this same hobby and few months back when he showed me his collection of autograph, I was simply speechless. He has a collection of more than 2000 autographs in his diary, books and in other places including many world renowned writers, politicians, actors, players and other famous people.I value his passion and inspiration of collecting the autograph and that's why I possess a positive thinking about this hobby of my friend. Having some kind of activity and passion is always positive and this helps us learning many new things and experiencing many new things which otherwise would not have been possible. So I would opine that this is a good hobby and I am proud of my friend for his hobby and great collection.Similar Cue Card TopicsYour ability to talk about this Cue Card would enable you to talk about the following Cue Cards as well:Describe a hobby you once had.Describe a hobby one of your family members has.Describe a hobby or habit you wish you had.Describe your favourite past time.。

《剑桥雅思七》写作例文的修改和讲解

《剑桥雅思七》写作例文的修改和讲解

《剑桥雅思七》写作例文的修改和讲解近来,我在国内出版的雅思书籍和相关网站看到介绍《剑桥雅思七》TEST 2的一篇Band 7.5写作例文,但都没有将文中的具体错误加以更正,这样对广大雅思考生英语水平的提高是无益的.本人现将该文的错误予以更正并作出详细讲评,供广大考生研习.文章题目如下:Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime. Others, however, argue that the circumstances of an individual crime, and the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.《剑桥雅思七》原书写作例文如下:Fixing punishments for each type of crime has been a debatable issue. There are many arguments supporting both views, those for and those against fixed punishments.On the one hand, fixed punishments will have a deterring effect on society. Individuals knowing that they will be subject to a certain punishment if they are convicted with a given crime, will reconsider committing this act in the first place.This deterring effect also leads to social stability and security, through minimising the number of crimes committed.If people knew they would be able to convince the court or the jury of a reason for having committed the crime they are accused of, penal decisions would be largely arbitrary. This would result into criminals getting away with their crimes and into a high level of injustice caused by the subjective approach of different courts.On the other hand, taking the circumstances of a crime and its motivation into consideration is a prerequisite for establishing and ensuring justice and equity.A person killing in self-defense can not be compared to a serial killer, moving from one victim to the next. In my opinion an intermediary position between both solutions is the perfect way to establish and ensure justice and equity.There has to be fixed punishment for all crimes. However, criminal laws have to provide for a minimum and maximum for the punishment and the laws also have to foresee certain cases of exemptions.An example for setting minimum and maximum penalties is competition law where a person being held liable of a crime under this law will be convicted to pay a fine, according to the harm caused by the violation and the profit gained by the violator through committing the crime.As for the exemptions, in some countries the law exempts thiefs stealing food during a period of famine taking into consideration the distress and hunger.Also, a person killing in self-defense will be exempted from punishment.《剑桥雅思七》一书提供的雅思考官对该文的点评:该文论证清晰、观点明确、用词和句型丰富多样,除个别地方外,基本准确.但该文的段落分配不够合理,有的段落连接显得混乱.此外,没有明确的结论也是该文的一个不足.以下是经我改正过的范文:To date, imposing a fixed punishment for each type of crime has been a debatable issue. There are many arguments for and against the execution of penalty.On one hand, fixed punishments will have a deterring effect on potential criminals. Individuals will think twice before committing an offence if they know that they will be subjected to a certain punishment if convicted of a given crime. In addition, this deterring effect also helps to enhance social stability and security through minimising the number of crimes committed. On the other hand, if people knew they would be able to convince the court or the jury of a reason for having committed the crime they are accused of, penal decisions would be largely arbitrary. This would result in criminals getting away with their crime and a high level of injustice could be caused by the subjective approach of different courts.There have to be fixed punishments for all crimes. However, criminal laws have to provide a minimum and maximum for the punishment and the laws should also foresee certain cases of exemptions. One example for setting minimum and maximum penalties is the competition law under which a person held liable for a crime will be convicted to pay a fine according to the harm caused by the violation and the profit gained by the violator through committing the crime. As for exemptions, in some countries thieves stealing food during a period of famine are exempted from punishments.Therefore, in my opinion, taking the circumstances of a crime and its motivation into consideration is a prerequisite for the measurement of punishment. A person killing in self-defense can not be compared to a serial killer who moves from one victim to another. Perhaps a balanced approach could be a perfect way to ensure legal justice and equality.修改讲解:第一段:1. 原文第一句Fixing punishments for each type of crime has been a debatable issue不如改为To date, imposing a fixed punishment for each type of crime has been a debatable issue更符合英语逻辑和书面表达习惯,而且加上to date显得更为自然些.2. 原文第二句表达显过于wordy, 改为There are many arguments for and against the execution of penalty较为简练,而且避免了fixed punishment重复使用.第二段:1. 原文第一句中的on society 说法有些过于笼统,现改为更为具体的potential criminals.2. 原文第二句表述有些不够流畅,改为Individuals will think twice before committing an offence if they know that they will be subjected to a certain punishment if convicted of a given crime. 原文的will be subject to a certain punishment 改为will be subjected to a certain punishment更为常见.第四段:1. 该段原文的最后一句中的result into 应该为result in才符合英语惯用.第五、六段:将原文第五六段放到文章结论段更符合行文逻辑.原句中an intermediary position between both solutions is the perfect way改为a balanced approach could be a perfect way to ensure legal justice and equality 更为简练、准确.第七段:原文provide后的for 应删掉.第八段:原文第一句的where用在这里不准确,liable of 应改为liable for.第九段:原文中的thiefs应为thieves, taking into consideration the distress and hunger用在这里从修辞角度讲指代不够明确.另外,原文段落过多,显得十分松散.通过合并或调整一些段落,改后的作文更加紧凑,同时也修正了原文缺乏结论段的败笔.。

雅思写作改错练习(附答案)

雅思写作改错练习(附答案)

雅思写作改错练习(附答案)为了帮助大家备考雅思作文,提高写作水平,下面小编给大家带来雅思写作改错练习(附答案),希望大家喜欢!雅思写作改错练习(附答案)1Futurism, an early twentieth-century movement in art, rejected all traditions and attempts to glorify contemporary life by emphasizing the machine and motion.2 But, for a small group of students, professional training might be the way to go since well-developing skills, all other factors being equal, can be the difference between having a job or not.3 For a group of remaining in existence, a profit-making organization must, in the long run, produces something consumers consider useful or desirable.4 For a result of two or three centuries of scientific investigation we have come to believe that Nature is understandable in the sense that when we ask her questions by way of appropriate observations and experiments,she will answer truly and reward us with discoveries that endure.5 At the same time, young people should be encourage to communicate with their peers and develop their interpersonal skills, which may help them greatly to reduce dependence in their parents.6 When a new movement in art attains a certain fashion, it is advisable to find out what their advocates are aiming at, for, however farfetched and unreasonable their principles may seem today, it is possible that in years to come they may be regarded as normal.7 Numerous other commercial enterprises, from theaters tomagazine publishers, from gas and electric utilities to milk processors, bring better and more efficiently services to consumers through the use of computers.8 The American economic system is, organizing around a basically private-enterprise, market-oriented economy in that consumers largely determine what shall be produced by spending their money in the marketplace for those goods and services that they want most.9 Thus, in the American economic system it is the demand of individual consumers, coupled with the desire of businessmen to maximize profits and the desire of individuals to maximize their incomes, which together determine what shall be produced and how resources are used to produce it.10 The individual now has more information available than any generation, and the task of finding that one information relevant to his or her specific problem is complicated, time--consuming, and sometimes even overwhelming.参考答案1Futurism, an early twentieth-century movement in art, rejected all traditions and attempts to glorify contemporary life by emphasizing the machine and motion.错误: and并列连接两个谓语,应该是平行结构。

雅思作文-带修改批注2

雅思作文-带修改批注2

Task1: School should concentrate on teaching students the academic subjects that will be useful for their future careers. Subjects such as music and sports are not useful. To what extent do you agree or disagree?As competition in work more and more furious, some people hold that schools should concentrate on teaching students the academic subjects which will be useful for their future careers, and subjects such as music and sports are useless. I don’t agree the point at a certain extent.From short term of view, more attention paid on the academic subjects will help students to develop well in their careers, and time and energy spent on “entertainment subjects” is a waste. To get a decent job or start his own business, a student should make full use of his time to improve his ability and expand his academic knowledge. And one of the most relatively and short-cut way is acquire academic knowledge and skills as more as possible. So rather than teaching sports, music and etc, schools should pay more attention on academic subjects which can get a direct effect.However, from long term, subjects such as sports and art may influence our life as well. It’s very common sense in the modern life that one may change his work frequently, and even do some jobs which have little relationship with his academic subjects which he learned at school. And on the other hand, music and sports could bring him more benefit, such as health body, optimistic mind and wide view of the world. Albert Einstein, one of the most preeminent physical scientists, who achieved climax of his career, said that he get the spirit of theory of relativism when he played violin. That’s to say the courses such as sports and music values our attention as well.To sum up, though attention paid to academic subjects may get some fruit quickly, schools should also share some time with other subjects such as music and sports which may reward students more in future.2010-7-26评:审题准确,结构明晰,语言流畅,但是要把握语句前后之间的推理,防止产生思维跳跃让考官看不懂;6.5Task1: some high school leavers tend to go traveling or working for a period of time rather than directly attending university. What do you think of the advantages and disadvantages of doing so and state your opinions on it.The issue of whether high school leavers go traveling and working for a period or attending university directly is of great interest to the public. From my point of view, the advantages and disadvantages of doing so depend on students’ majors.For the students, who will devotes to social science such as history, sociology, business, management and etc, will get benefit from their traveling and working experience which they gained before they go to study in university. In period of traveling and working, students can get information vividly compared to require it from books and classes. A scientific survey revealed that human beings could acquire and cognize knowledge better from their directly contact. From the traveling and working, the eye shot and mind of students could be widen, then they will appreciate and comprehends lessons better in university than their counterparts who don’t have the experience.However, it is not the same case for students who will involve in areas of natural science. I believe it is better for them to go to university directly. The students graduated from senior high schools don’t have essence skills and suitable abilities to acquire a relatively job but just do some simple tame things which not only can’t improve their special knowledge but also waste lots of time. What’s more, during traveling and working, student’s may lost their interest in study which could cause serious problems in the future. And subjects, such as mathematics, physics and engineering, require students to keep reading books, thinking themselves and asking teachers. So instead of traveling or working for a period of time, it’s better for them to directly attending university.In sum, the choice of traveling, working or attending university directly depends on what kinds of subjects the students will devote into.2010-7-27 评:对比的结构运用的很好,遣词造句都比较到位最好有更好,更详实的例子7。

雅思写作句子改错(参考答案)

雅思写作句子改错(参考答案)

雅思写作常用语法错误分析1.We are frequently confronted with statement about the alarming rate of loss of language diversity.错因:statement是可数名词,在这里要么加冠词,要么变复数。

改正:We are frequently confronted with statements about the alarming rate of loss of language diversity.大意:我们经常听到关于语言多元性快速丧失的言论。

2.Globalization will always have supporters who are blind on the destruction it can cause.错因:惯用法。

介词使用错误,blind后面常加to.改正:Globalization will always have supporters who are blind to the destruction it can cause.大意:全球化总有一些支持者,他们对由全球化造成的破坏视而不见。

3.One problem that has not yet been addressed is the existing infrastructure and facilities fail to meet the demand posed by increased arrivals of tourists.错因:句子结构。

有两个谓语动词,分别是is和fail,需要将其中一个改成从句。

改正:One problem that has not yet been addressed is that the existing infrastructure and facilities fail to meet the demand posed by increased arrivals of tourists.大意:一个仍然还没有被解决的问题是现有的基础设施和设备不能够满足越来越多的游客的需要.4.Children,if grown up in a multicultural society,are more likely to embrace different cultures and values.错因:从句部分不能用过去分词,小孩与grow up之间是主动关系。

英文作文修改意见

英文作文修改意见

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作文700字加批注

作文700字加批注

作文700字加批注英文回答:In my opinion, learning a second language is extremely beneficial for several reasons. Firstly, it broadens our horizons and allows us to connect with people from different cultures and backgrounds. For example, I have a friend who speaks fluent French, and because of her language skills, she was able to travel to France and easily communicate with the locals. This not only enhanced her travel experience but also helped her make new friends and learn about the French culture.Secondly, learning a second language can greatly improve our cognitive abilities. Studies have shown that bilingual individuals have better problem-solving skills and are more creative. This is because learning a new language requires us to think in different ways and adapt to different grammar and vocabulary rules. For instance, when I started learning Spanish, I had to learn new verbconjugations and sentence structures, which challenged my brain and improved my overall cognitive function.Furthermore, being bilingual can also provide us with better job opportunities. In today's globalized world, many companies are looking for employees who can speak multiple languages. For example, if a company has clients or partners in a foreign country, they would prefer to hire someone who can communicate with them in their native language. Therefore, learning a second language can give us a competitive edge in the job market and increase our chances of success.中文回答:在我看来,学习第二语言有很多好处。

雅思考官满分范文12篇

雅思考官满分范文12篇

Writing Task2 Topics2-2 “Prevention is better than cure.” Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?3-2 When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?6-GB Using a computer everyday can have more negative than positive effects on young children. Do you agree or disagree?5-2 In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.4-GB Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. What do you think are the advantages of attending school from a young age?6-2 Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.6-4 Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.3-3 In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?4-2 Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?4-4 In many countries schools have severe problems with students behavior. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?5-GB Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?2-2 “Prevention is better than cure.” Out of a country’s hea lth budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?Of course it goes without saying that prevention is better than cure. That is why, in recent years, there has been a growing body of opinion in favor of putting more resources into health education and preventive measures. The argument is that ignorance of, for example, basic hygiene or the dangers of an unhealthy diet or lifestyle needs to be combated by special nationwide publicity campaigns, as well as long-term health education.Obviously, there is a strong human argument for catching any medical condition as early as possible. There is also an economic argument for doing so. Statistics demonstrate the cost-effectiveness of treating a condition in the early stages, rather than delaying until more expensive and prolonged treatment is necessary. Then, there are social or economic costs, perhaps in terms of loss of earnings for the family concerned of unemployed benefit paid by the state.So far so good, but the difficulties start when we try to define what the “proportion” of the budget should be, particularly if the funds will be “diverted from treatment”. Decisions on exactly how much of the total health budget should be spent in this way are not a matter for the non-specialist, but should be made on the basis of an accepted health service model.This is the point at which real problems occur----the formulation of the model. How do we accurately measure which health education campaigns are effective in both medical and financial terms? How do we agree about the medical efficacy of various screening programs, for example, when the medical establishment itself does not agree? A very rigorous process of evaluation is called for, so that we can make informed decisions.3-2 When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?Overall, I disagree with the opinion expressed. I would like to begin by pointing out that traditional skills and ways of life are not automatically of one country, but of a culture or community.In many ways, the history of civilization is the history of technology: from thediscovery of fire to the invention of the wheel to the development of the Internet, we have been moving on from previous ways of doing things. Some technologies, such as weapons of mass destruction, are of negative impact. Others, such as medical advances, positively help people to live better or longer, and so very much help traditional ways of life. Surely, few people would seek to preserve such traditions as living in caves!Interestingly, technology can positively contribute to the keeping alive of traditional skills and ways of life. For example, the populations of some islands are too small to have normal schools. Rather than breaking up families by sending children to the mainland, education authorities have been able to use the Internet to deliver schooling online. In addition, the Internet, and modern refrigeration techniques, are being used to keep alive the traditional skills of producing salmon; it can now be ordered from, and delivered to, anywhere in the world.In conclusion, without suggesting that all technology is necessarily good, I think it is by no means “pointless”, in any way, to try to keep traditions alive with technology. We should not ignore technology, because it can be our friend and support our way of life.6-GB Using a computer everyday can have more negative than positive effects on young children. Do you agree or disagree?I tend to agree that young children can be negatively affected by too much time spent on the computer everyday. This is partly because sitting in front of a screen for too long can be damaging to both the eyes and the physical posture of a young child, regardless of what they are using the computer for.However, the main concern is about the type of computer activities that attract children. These are often electronic games that tend to be very intense and rather violent. The player is usually the “hero” of the game and too much exposure can encourage children to be self-centered and insensitive to others.Even when children use a computer for other purposes, such as getting information or emailing friends, it is no substitute for human interaction. Spending time with other children and sharing non-virtual experience is an important part of a child’s development that cannot be provided by a computer.In spite of this, the obvious benefits of computer skills for young children cannot be denied. Their adult world will be changing constantly in terms of technology and theInternet is the key to all the knowledge and information available in the world today. Therefore, it is important that children learn at an early age to use the equipment enthusiastically and with confidence as they will need these skills throughout their studies and working lives.I think the main point is to make sure that young children do not overuse computers. Parents must ensure that their children learn to enjoy other kinds of activity and not simply sit at home, learning to live in a virtual world.5-2 In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.It is quite common these days for young people in many countries to have a break from studying after graduating from high school. The trend is not restricted to rich students who have the money to travel, but is also evident among poorer students who choose to work and become economically independent for a period of time.The reason for this trend may involve the recognition that a young adult who passes directly from school to university is rather restricted in terms of general knowledge and experience of the world. By contrast, those who have spent some time earning a living or travelling to other places, have a broader view of life and better personal resources to draw on. They tend to be more independent, which is a very important factor in academic study and research, as well as giving them an advantage in terms of coping with the challenges of student life.However, there are certainly dangers in taking time off at that important age. Young adults may end up never returning to their studies or finding it difficult to readapt to an academic environment. They may think that it is better to continue in a particular job, or to do something completely different from a university course. But overall, I think this is less likely today, when academic qualifications are essential for getting a reasonable career.My view is that young people should be encouraged to broaden their horizons. That is the best way for them to get a clear perspective of what they are hoping to do with their lives and why. Students with such a perspective are usually the most effective and motivated ones and taking a year off may be the best way to gain this.4-GB Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. What do you think are the advantages of attending school from a young age?In many places today, children start primary school at around the age of six or seven. However, because it is more likely now that both parents work, there is little opportunity for children to stay in their own home up to that age. Instead, they will probably go to a nursery school when they are much younger.While some people think this may be dam aging to a child’s development, or to a child’s relationshi p with his or her parents, in fact there are many advantages to having school experience at a young age.Firstly, a child will learn to interact with a lot of different people and some children learn to communicate very early because of this. They are generally more confident and independent than children who stay at home with their parents and who are not used to strangers or new situations. Such children find their first day at school at the age of six very frightening and this may have a negative effect on how they learn.Another advantage of going to school at an early age is that children develop faster socially. They make friends and learn how to get on with other children of a similar age. This is often not possible at home because they are the only child, or because their brothers or sisters are older or younger.So overall, I believe that, attending school from a young age is good for most children. They still spend plenty of time at home with their parents, so they can benefit from both environments.6-2 Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.As a result of constant media attention, sports professionals in my country have become stars and celebrities, and those at the top are paid huge salaries. Just like movie stars, they live extravagant lifestyles with huge houses and cars.Many people find their rewards unfair, especially when comparing these super salaries with those of top surgeons or research scientists, or even leading politicians who have the responsibility of governing the country. However, sports salaries are notdetermined by considering the contribution to society a person makes, or the level of responsibility he or she holds. Instead, they reflect the public popularity of sports in general and the level of public support that successful stars can generate. So the notion of ‘fairness’ is not the issue.Those who feel that sports stars’ salaries are justified might argue that the number of professionals with real talent is very few, and the money is a recognition of the skills and dedication a person needs to be successful. Competition is constant and a player is tested every time they perform in their relative short career. The pressure from the media is intense and there is little privacy out of the spotlight. So all of these factors may justify the huge earnings.Personally, I think that the amount of money such sports stars make is more justified than the huge earnings of movie stars, but at the same time, it indicates that our society places more value on sport that on more essential professions and achievements.6-4 Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.Over the last half century the pace of change in the life of human beings has increased beyond our wildest expectations. This has been driven by technological and scientific breakthroughs that are changing the whole way we view the world on an almost daily basis. This means that change is not always a personal option, but an inescapable fact of life, and we need to constantly adapt to keep pace with it.Those people who believe they have achieved some security by doing the same, familiar things are living in denial. Even when people believe they are resisting change themselves, they cannot stop the world around them from changing. Sooner or later, they will find that the familiar jobs no longer exist, or that the “safe” patterns of behavior are no longer appropriate.However, reaching the conclusion that change is inevitable is not the same as assuming that “change is always for the better”. Unfortunately, it is not always the case that new things are promoted because they have good impacts for the majority of people. A lot of innovations are made with the aim of making money for a few. This is because it is the rich and powerful people in our society who are able to impose changes (such as in working conditions or property developments) that are in their own interests.In conclusion, I would say that change can be stimulating and energizing for individuals when they pursue it themselves, but that all change, including that which is imposed on people, does not necessarily have good outcomes.3-3 In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?The issue of children doing paid work is a complex and sensitive one. It is difficult to say who has the right to judge whether children working is wrong or valuable. Opinions will also differ as to learning benefits: no doubt teachers and factory owners, for example, would have varying concerns.An important consideration is the kind of work undertaken. Young children doing arduous and repetitive tasks on a factory production line, for example, are less likely to be learning than older children helping in an old people’s home. There are health and safety issues to be considered as well. It is an unfortunate fact that many employers may prefer to use the services of children simply to save money by paying them less than adults and it is this type of exploitation that should be discouraged.However, in many countries children work because their families need the additional income, no matter how small. This was certainly the case in the past in many industrialized countries, and it is very difficult to judge that it is wrong for children today to contribute to the family income in this way.Nevertheless, in better economic circumstances, few parents would choose to send their children out to full-time paid work. If leaning responsibilities and work experience are considered to be important, then children can acquire these by having light, part-time jobs or even doing tasks such as helping their parents around the family home, which are unpaid, but undoubtedly of value in children’s development.4-2 Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?Happiness is very difficult to define, because it means so many different things to different people. While some people link happiness to wealth and material success, others think it lies in emotions and loving personal relationships. Yet others think that spiritual paths, rather than either the material world or relationships with people, are the only way to true happiness.Because people interpret happiness for themselves in so many different ways, it is difficult to give any definition that is true for everyone. However, if there are any different kinds of happiness for different individuals then the first step in achieving it would be to have a degree of self-knowledge. A person needs to know who he or she is before being able to know what it is that makes him or her happy.Of course, factors such as loving relationships, good health, the skills to earn a living and a peaceful environment all contribute to our happiness too. But this does not mean that people without these conditions cannot be happy.Overall, I think an ability to keep clear perspectives in life is a more essential factor in achieving happiness. By that I mean an ability to have a clear sense of what is important in our lives(the welfare of our families, the quality of our relationships, making other people happy, etc.) and what is not (a problem at work, getting annoyed about trivial things, etc.)Like self-awareness, this is also very difficult to achieve, but I think these are the two factors that may be the most important for achieving happiness.4-4 In many countries schools have severe problems with students’behavior. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?Poor student behavior seems to be an increasingly widespread problem and I think that modern lifestyles are probably responsible for this.In many countries, the birth rate is decreasing so that families are smaller with fewer children. These children are often spoilt, not in terms of love and attention because working parents do not have the time for this, but in more material ways. They are allowed to have whatever they want, regardless of price, and to behave as they please. This means that the children grow up without consideration for others and without any understanding of where their standard of living comes from.When they get to school age they have not learnt any self control or discipline. They have less respect for their teachers and refuse to obey school rules in the way that their parents did.Teachers continually complain about this problem and measures should be taken to combat the situation. But I think the solution to the problem lies in with the families, who need to be more aware of the future consequences of spoiling their children. If they could raise them to be considerate of others and to be social, responsibleindividuals, the whole community would benefit.Perhaps parenting classes are needed to help them to do this, and high quality nursery schools could be established that would support families more in terms of raising the next generation. The government should fund this kind of parental support, because this is no longer a problem for individual families, but for society as a whole.5-GB Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?I think it is true that in almost every country today each household and family produces a large amount of waste every week. Most of this rubbish comes from the packaging from the things we buy, such as processed food. But even if we buy fresh food without packaging, we still produce rubbish from the plastic bags used everywhere to carry shopping home.The reason why we have so much packaging is that we consume so much more on a daily basis than families did in the past. Convenience is also very important in modern life, so we buy packaged or canned food that can be transported from long distances and stored until we need it, first in the supermarket, and then at home.However, I think the amount of waste produced is also a result of our tendency to use something once and throw it away. We forget that even the cheapest plastic bag has used up valuable resources and energy to produce. We also forget that it is a source of pollution and difficult to dispose of.I think, therefore, that governments need to raise this awareness in the general public. Children can be educated about environmental issues at school, but adults need to take action. Governments can encourage such action by putting taxes on packaging, such as plastic bags, by providing recycling services and by fining households and shops that do not attempt to recycle their waste.With the political will, such measures could really reduce the amount of rubbish we produce. Certainly nobody wants to see our resources used up and our planet poisoned by waste.5-4 Research indicates that the characteristics we are born with have much more influence on our personality and development than any experiences we may have in our life.Which do you consider to be the major influence?Today the way we consider human psychology and mental development is heavily influenced by the genetic sciences. We now understand the importance of inherited characteristics more than ever before. Yet we are still unable to decide whether an individual’s personality and development are more influenced by genetic factors (nature) or by the environment (nurture).Research, relating to identical twins, has highlighted how significant inherited characteristics can be for and individual’s life. But whether these characteristics are able to develop within the personality of an individual surely depends on whether the circumstances allow such a development. It seems that the experiences we have in life are so unpredictable and so powerful, that they can boost or over-ride other influences, and there seems to be plenty of research findings to confirm this.My own view is that there is no one major influence in a person’s life. Instead, the traits we inherit from our parents and the situations and experiences that we encounter in life are constantly interacting. It is the interaction of the two that shapes a person’s personality and dictates how that personality develops. If this were not true, then we would be able to predict the behavior and character of a person from the moment they were born.In conclusion, I do not think that either nature of nurture is the major influence on a person, but that both have powerful effects. How these factors interact is still unknown today and they remain largely unpredictable in a person’s life.。

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Task1: School should concentrate on teaching students the academic subjects that will be useful for their future careers. Subjects such as music and sports are not useful. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
As competition in work more and more furious, some people hold that schools should concentrate on teaching students the academic subjects which will be useful for their future careers, and subjects such as music and sports are useless. I don’t agree the point at a certain extent.
From short term of view, more attention paid on the academic subjects will help students to develop well in their careers, and time and energy spent on “entertainment subjects” is a waste. To get a decent job or start his own business, a student should make full use of his time to improve his ability and expand his academic knowledge. And one of the most relatively and short-cut way is acquire academic knowledge and skills as more as possible. So rather than teaching sports, music and etc, schools should pay more attention on academic subjects which can get a direct effect.
However, from long term, subjects such as sports and art may influence our life as well. It’s very common sense in the modern life that one may change his work frequently, and even do some jobs which have little relationship with his academic subjects which he learned at school. And on the other hand, music and sports could bring him more benefit, such as health body, optimistic mind and wide view of the world. Albert Einstein, one of the most preeminent physical scientists, who achieved climax of his career, said that he get the spirit of theory of relativism when he played violin. That’s to say the courses such as sports and music values our attention as well.
To sum up, though attention paid to academic subjects may get some fruit quickly, schools should also share some time with other subjects such as music and sports which may reward students more in future.
2010-7-26
评:
审题准确,结构明晰,语言流畅,但是要把握语句前后之间的推理,防止产生思维跳跃让考官看不懂;
6.5
Task1: some high school leavers tend to go traveling or working for a period of time rather than directly attending university. What do you think of the advantages and disadvantages of doing so and state your opinions on it.
The issue of whether high school leavers go traveling and working for a period or attending university directly is of great interest to the public. From my point of view, the advantages and disadvantages of doing so depend on students’ majors.
For the students, who will devotes to social science such as history, sociology, business, management and etc, will get benefit from their traveling and working experience which they gained before they go to study in university. In period of traveling and working, students can get information vividly compared to require it from books and classes. A scientific survey revealed that human beings could acquire and cognize knowledge better from their directly contact. From the traveling and working, the eye shot and mind of students could be widen, then they will appreciate and comprehends lessons better in university than their counterparts who don’t have the experience.
However, it is not the same case for students who will involve in areas of natural science. I believe it is better for them to go to university directly. The students graduated from senior high schools don’t have essence skills and suitable abilities to acquire a relatively job but just do some simple tame things which not only can’t improve their special knowledge but also waste lots of time. What’s more, during traveling and working, student’s may lost their interest in study which could cause serious problems in the future. And subjects, such as mathematics, physics and engineering, require students to keep reading books, thinking themselves and asking teachers. So instead of traveling or working for a period of time, it’s better for them to directly attending university.
In sum, the choice of traveling, working or attending university directly depends on what kinds of subjects the students will devote into.
2010-7-27 评:
对比的结构运用的很好,
遣词造句都比较到位
最好有更好,更详实的例子
7。

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