初中英语笑话

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英语小笑话适合初一的

英语小笑话适合初一的笑话是一种用来逗笑取乐的文体。

笑话,不仅能让同学们在日常生活和学习中不时地会心一笑,还能从中学习到不少的英语知识。

小编精心收集了适合初一的英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!适合初一的英语小笑话篇1白痴老师If there are any idiots in the room,will they please stand up?" said the sarcastic teacher .喜爱挖苦人的老师说：“如果在这间教室里面有白痴，就请站起来好吗?”。

After a long silence,one rreshman rose to his feet,沉默了很久之后，有一名新生就站起来了。

"Now then mister ,why do you consider yourself an idiot? "enquired the teacher with a sneer.老师就以讥笑的口气问他：“喂，先生，你为什么认为你自己是个白痴呀?”"Well ,actually I don't,"said the student ,"but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."这名学生说：“ 唉呀，实际上我才不认为我是个白痴呢，而是我很讨厌看着你一个人站在那里啦。

”适合初一的英语小笑话篇2交换三明治Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks.有两位律师走进一家小餐厅。

点了两份饮料。

Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.然后他们就从他们的公文包当中拿出三明治开始吃。

The waiter became quite concerned服务生感到相当不妥，and marched over and told them,"You can't eat your own sandeiches in here!"就走过去告诉他们：“你们不可以在这里吃你们自己的三明治!”The attorneys looked each other ,这两位律师彼此。

适合初中学生的英语笑话

适合初中学生的英语笑话从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的调剂品,它使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。

本文是适合初中学生的英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!适合初中学生的英语笑话篇一WomenA Sikh, an Italian & a Frenchman were drinking in a pub when the subject ofWOMAN came up in their conversation.The Italian said, in Italy we treat the woman like a guitar. We press the top & tickle the bottom.The Frenchman said, in France, we treat the woman like cognac. We smell first & then lick slowly. What about the woman in your country,Mr Singh?The Italian asked.In our country, we treat the woman like a record. First we play the front &/when we finish, we flip it over & play the back.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇二Bill GatesBill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by God"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do somethingI've never done before; in your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."Bill replied, " Well, what's the difference between the two?"God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision.""Fine, but where should I go first?""I'll leave that up to you.""Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."So Bill went to Hell.It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature perfect. He was very pleased."This is great!" he told God. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see heaven!""Fine," said God, and off they went. Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision."Hmmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons."How's everything going?" he asked Bill.Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment,"this is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beaches, the beautiful women playing in the water "That was the SCREENSAVER," replied God.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇三CoincidenceA man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a triple martini. The bartender says "What a coincidence, the only other person at the bar is that beautiful woman at the other end. She is also drinking triple martinis".After a few sips of his drink, the man walks up to the woman and says, "Isn't it a coincidence that we are both having the same drink".She replies "Yes! I am here because I am celebrating. After 20 years of trying I am finally pregnant!""What a coincidence" the man replied. "I am also celebrating.After years of experimenting, I have invented a multicolored chicken. At this, the woman asked "How did you ever accomplish that!?"."I had to try a lot of different cocks" he said. The woman replied"What a coincidence"适合初中学生的英语笑话篇四son-in-lawA 60 year old woman came home one day and heard strange noises in her bedroom. She opened the door and discovered her 40 year old daughter playing with a vibrator. "What are you doing?" asked the mother."Mom, I'm 40 years old, and look at me. I'm ugly. I'll never get married so this is pretty much my husband." The mother walked out of the room shaking her head.The next day, the father came home and heard noises in the bedroom. Upon entering the room, he found his daughter using the vibrator."What the hell are you doing he asked.His daughter replied, "I already told mom. I'm 40 years old now and I'm ugly. I will never get married so this is as close as I'll ever get to a husband." The father walked out of the room shaking his head.The next day, the mother came home and found her husband with a beer in one hand and the vibrator in the other watching the football game onTV. "What on Earth are you doing?" she cried.The husband replied, "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having a beer and watching the football game with my son-in-law!!"。

初一英语小笑话

初一英语小笑话笑话不仅是我们生活中不可缺少的，而且也是我们工作学习之余缓解压力、舒缓情绪的重要渠道。

小编精心收集了初一英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!初一英语小笑话篇1FUTURE未来A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.A man never worries about thefuture until he gets a wife.女人直到找到丈夫前都在担心未来;男人直到找到妻子前从不担心未来。

初一英语小笑话篇2Contented Married Life令人满意的婚姻生活A man was telling one of his friends the secret of his contented married life, "My wife makes allthe small decisions," he explained, "and I make all the big ones, so we never interfere in eachother's business and never get annoyed with each other. We have no complaints and noarguments."一个男人告诉他的朋友自己婚姻幸福美满的秘密，“小事都由我妻子决定，”他解释说：“而我只管大事，我们从不互相干涉，从不生对方的气。

我们从来没有抱怨、没有争吵。

”"That sounds reasonable," answered his friend sympathetically. "And what sort of decisionsdoes your wife make?"“听起来很有道理，”他的朋友深有同感，“有哪些事情由你妻子作决定呢?”"Well," answered the man, "she decides what jobs I apply for, what sort of house we live in,what furniture we have, where wego for our holidays, and things like that."“嗯，”那个人回答说：“她决定我申请什么工作，我们住什么房子，买什么家具，去哪里度假这些事情。

初中英语笑话

1.Oncetwohunterswenthuntingintheforest.Oneofthem suddenlyfelldownbyaccident.Heshowedthewhitesofhiseyesandseemedtohavec easedbreathing.Theotherhuntersoontookouthis mobilephonetocalltheemergencycenterforhelp.Theoperatorsaidcalmly:"Fir st,youshouldmakesurethatheisalreadydead."Thentheoperatorheardagunshot fromtheotherendofthephoneandnextheheardthehunterasking:"WhatshouldIdo next?"两个猎人进森林里打猎，其中一个猎人不慎跌倒，两眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。

另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。

接线员沉着地说：“第一步，要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。

”于是，接线员在电话里听到一声枪响，然后听到那猎人接着问：“第二步怎办？”2.Letmetakeitdown Anelephantsaidtoamouse,"nodoubtthatyouarethesmallestznd mostuselessthingthatIhaveeverseen.""Pless,sayitagain.Letmetakeitdown."themousesaid."Iwilltella fleawhatIknow."为我所用一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。

”“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。

”老鼠说。

“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。

3.WateringFlowerInRainTom:Whydoyouhavethatwateringcan?Dan:I'mgoingtowatertheflowers.Tom:Butit'draining.Dan:That'sOK.I'mwear-ingmyraincoat.雨天浇花汤姆：你拿喷壶做什么？丹：我要去浇花。

初一英语笑话带翻译

初一英语笑话带翻译推荐文章100字的英语笑话大全热度：经典英语小笑话带翻译热度：优秀经典的英语笑话有哪些热度：优秀经典的英语笑话带翻译热度：简短经典的英语笑话带翻译热度：笑话是内容丰富并具有出乎意料结尾的幽默口头故事。

笑话几乎涵盖人们生活的所有领域,其中包括政治笑话、经济笑话、家庭生活笑话、关于民族性格的笑话等。

小编精心收集了初一英语笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!初一英语笑话带翻译篇1The Brain Surgeon was about to perform a brain transplant."You have your choice of two brains," he told the patient, "For $1000 you can have the brain of a psychologist, or for $10,000 you can have the brain of a politician."The patient was amazed at the huge difference in price. "Is the brain of a politician that much better?" he asked.The Brain Surgeon replied, "No, it’s not better, just unused."脑移植一个外科医生正要作一个脑移植手术。

“你可以从两个脑子中选一个给你。

”医生告诉病人，“一个心理学家的大脑1000美元，一个政治家的大脑10000美元。

病人很惊讶二者之间这样大的差别，“政治家的大脑好一些吗?”他问。

医生说：“不是好一些，只是没有用过。

”初一英语笑话带翻译篇2"What are you so happy about?"a woman asked the 98-year-old man."I broke a mirror," he replied."But that means seven years of bad luck.""I know." he said, beaming,"Isn’t it wonderful?"这难道不好吗?“你高兴什么?”一个女士问一个98岁的老人。

有关英语小笑话带翻译初中生可以理解

有关英语小笑话带翻译初中生可以理解在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。

小编精心收集了有关英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!有关英语小笑话带翻译篇1Son： Mum ,if someone broke your best. vase what would you do?儿子：妈妈，如果有人打碎了你最好的花瓶，你会怎么办?Mum：I'd spank him and send him to bed without any supper!妈妈：我要揍他，还不让他吃晚饭就去睡觉!Son： Well,you' d better get the slipper. Dad's just broken it !儿子：好了，你准备好拖鞋吧，爸爸刚把那只花瓶摔碎了。

有关英语小笑话带翻译篇2Nurse: Don't you like your new baby sister, Johnny?保姆: 约翰尼，你难道不喜欢你新生的小妹妹?Johnny: She's all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.约翰尼: 她还可以，但要是个男孩就好了。

威利·史密斯有一个新生的小妹妹。

现在他该认为我又在跟他学了。

有关英语小笑话带翻译篇3Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johmmy,and now there is only one piece left. Can you explain that?妈妈: 约翰尼，我今天早上在橱子里放了两块点心。

七年级英语短的笑话

七年级英语短的笑话笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。

小编精心收集了七年级英语短的笑话，供大家欣赏学习!七年级英语短的笑话篇1Make your fortune"How did you make your fortune?""I became the partner of a rich man.He had the money and I had the experience.""How did that help?""Now he has the experience and I the money."计划你的将来“你是怎么计划你的将来的?”“我变成一个富人的合伙人，他有钱，我有经验。

”“那有什么用?”“现在他有经验了，我有钱。

”七年级英语短的笑话篇2Boxing and RunningDan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight."Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box."Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."拳击和赛跑丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。

他告诉他的朋友：“这是一个粗暴的世界，所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。

”朋友：“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大，健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办?”丹：“我也会教他怎么样赛跑呢。

”七年级英语短的笑话篇3LawyersA drunk stands up in a bar and shouts, "All Lawyers are scumbags". Another drunk stands up and yells, "Hey, I resent that remark". The first drunk yells. "Why are you a lawyer". "No", said the second drunk, "I’m a scumbag".律师一喝醉了的人在一声酒吧呼喊,"所有的律师都是无赖" 。

英语短笑话带翻译初中

英语短笑话带翻译初中笑话是⼀种重要的交际⼿段,在⼈们的⽇常⽣活中起着重要作⽤,在社会⽂化中占据着重要地位。

下⾯是店铺带来的初中英语短笑话带翻译，欢迎欣赏! 初中英语短笑话带翻译篇1 John is not a "good" student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again. "John!" Teacher says angrily. "What? What's wrong?" John is awaken. "Why do you make a face? It's classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing." Teacher says. "No one is laughing." Teacher says. "No, it's not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping." John fells upset. "Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy." Teacher is satisfied with it. 约翰并不是个“好”学⽣。

他总是在上课的时候睡觉。

今天他⼜睡着了。

“约翰!”⽼师⽣⽓地喊他。

“什么?出什么事了?”约翰醒了。

“你为什么要做⿁脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”⽼师⽣⽓地说。

“没有⼈在笑呀。

”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。

“不，不是我。

我没有做⿁脸。

刚才我睡着了。

”约翰感到不安。

“嗯，还不错。

你承认⾃⼰的错误，还是给好孩⼦”⽼师为此感到满意。

初中英语短笑话带翻译篇2 Tony and his father are eating dinner. Suddenly Tony asks his father, "Dad, are flies yummy?" Dad frowns and says, "No, I think it's yucky. Why do you ask me this question? It's a silly question." But Tony says, "There was one fly in your plate." 托尼正和他爸爸⼀起吃晚餐。

初中英语小笑话带翻译

初中英语小笑话带翻译在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。

店铺整理了初中英语小笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!初中英语小笑话带翻译篇一always thirsty 总感到口渴"i had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。

”"that's terrible!" said the friend. "got any pain?"“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗?”"no, but i am always thirsty!"“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。

”初中英语小笑话带翻译篇二Two Birds 两只鸟Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。

谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

Teacher: Please tell us.老师：请说说看。

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

初中英语小笑话带翻译篇三if i am a managerone day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – if i am a manager.all the students began to write except a boy. the teacher went to him and asked the reason.“i am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer.如果我是一个经理一天课上，老师要同学们以“如果我是一个经理”为题写一篇作文。

初中英语小笑话带翻译阅读

初中英语小笑话带翻译阅读民间笑话是一种根植于日常生活的美学形态。

笑话产生于日常生活语境之中,以消遣和娱乐为目的,由普通民众创造、表演和欣赏。

我精心收集了初中英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!初中英语小笑话带翻译篇1a doctor came into the hospital ward and said to mr. johnson, "i have some good news and some bad news for you."一位医生走进医院的病房，告诉强森先生：“我有一个好消息和一个坏消息要告诉你。

”then mr. johnson said, "please, give me the good news first."强森先生说：“请先告诉我好消息吧!”so the doctor said, "the doctors here are going to name an incurable disease after you."医生说：“本院的医师决定用你的名字，来为一种不治之症命名。

”初中英语小笑话带翻译篇2when a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. the conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged用肘轻推 him and said: "wake up, sir!"当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。

售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了，他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒!”"i wasn't asleep," the man answered.“我没有睡着。

关于中学生英语小笑话

关于中学生英语小笑话笑话是日常生活中常见的一种幽默。

与一般日常会话不同,笑话刻意违反合作原则,由此衍生出会话含意,并利用会话含意之间的冲突实现其预定功能。

小编精心收集了关于中学生英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!关于中学生英语小笑话篇1你输了On her return from school，little Dolly, aged ten，was pulled on to her Daddy's knee，and informed that the fairies had that day brought a big surprise-a little baby brother.She seemed glad，and presently said:放学回到家里，十岁的小多莉被拉过来坐在她爸爸的膝上，她被告知那天仙女们带来了一个大大的惊奇—一个婴儿小弟弟。

她似乎很高兴，马上说:"Will you give me a stamp，daddy?I want to write and tell brother Tom.“爸爸，你能不能给我一张邮票?我要写信告诉汤姆哥哥。

”The father was touched by this，and provided the little lass with the materials to write a letter to her brother，who was away at ter，curious to know how she would tell the news，he took an opportunity to read what she had written.He received something of a shock on reading the following:父亲被这话感动了，他为小姑娘提供了给她哥哥写信所需的各种用具，她的哥哥住在学校里。

关于初中英语小笑话3篇

关于初中英语小笑话3篇冷笑话是近几年新兴的一种语言现象,它轻松诙谐、别具一格,给我们紧张的生活增添了几分轻松的情趣,它一出现便受到了大多数人的喜爱。

小编精心收集了关于初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!关于初中英语小笑话篇1Every year，our family holds a rummage sale. I have to justify my pricing system to my husband by explaining that no matter how low you mark an item，someone will always want to buy it for less.每年，我家都要有一次弃物甩卖。

我总是要给我丈夫讲授着我的价格观—不管你把价钱标得多低，有些人总是想再少付一点儿。

At our last sale, one customer proved my point. She approached me, carrying an item that she mistakenly believed was priced at one dollar. "would you take 75 cents for this?"she asked.我们最近的一个甩卖，一个顾客证实了我的观点。

这位顾客拿着一件东西朝我走来，她错误地以为这件东西的标价是一美元，说:“我出75分行吗?”"Sure,"I replied,”but it's only marked a quarter.”“当然可以，”我答道:“实际上它的标价是25美分。

”"Oh,"she responded. "Then would you take a dime?"她反应还挺快:“那我出10美分吧。

”关于初中英语小笑话篇2When I came home from the State University of Mew York at StonyBrook sporting a fashionable，s}rper-short hair-cut，my father teased rne all the way to dinner at a local diner.”You look like a boy，”he said.”I sent a daughter away to school and I got back a son.”我从斯多尼布鲁克的纽约州立大学回家时剪的是一种时髦的超级短头。

初中英语幽默笑话

初中英语幽默笑话“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。

”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。

下面店铺为大家带来初中英语幽默笑话，欢迎大家阅读!初中英语幽默笑话1：Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?""A kid bit me," replied Ivan."Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother."I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

他妈妈问，“发生了什么事?”“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。

“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。

”初中英语幽默笑话2：A father said to his sons: "Tomorrow your mother is going to bake a pie. Who is going to eat it?"The oldest son replied: "Father, I’ll eat it all!"The father then said: "Tomorrow Im going to butcher a pig. Who is going to eat it?"The same son answered: "Father,Ill eat it all!"The father added: "Tomorrow, we are going to plough the field. Who is going to plough?"The oldest son answered again: "Its always me, always me. Now its someone elses turn to volunteer!"一位父亲对他的儿子们说：“你们的妈妈明天要烙一张馅饼，谁要吃呢?”大儿子说：“爸爸，我要把它都吃了。

七年级英语小笑话小短文

七年级英语小笑话小短文民间笑话故事像神话小说等民间文学一样，是广大劳动人民在长期的生产劳动和与自然界作斗争的过程中，以口头形式创作和传承的文学体裁。

下面是店铺精心收集的七年级英语小笑话小短文，希望大家喜欢!七年级英语小笑话小短文篇一I Could Do It Slower我可以干得慢一些Patient: What do you charge for pulling a tooth?病人：拔一颗牙收费多少?Dentist: Fifty dollars.牙医：50美元。

Patient: Fifty dollars for a couple of minutes' work?病人：只几分钟的活儿就要50美元?Dentist: Well, I could do it slower, if you like.牙医：好的，如果你喜欢的话，我可以干得慢一些。

七年级英语小笑话小短文篇二Honey, said the husband to his wife, I invited a friend home for supper.“亲爱的，”丈夫对妻子说：“我邀请了一位朋友回家吃晚饭。

”What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I havent been shopping, all the dishes are dirty,and I dont feel like cooking a fancy meal!“什么?你疯了吗?我们的房子乱糟糟的，我很久没有买过东西回来了，所有的碗碟都是脏的，还有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚饭。

”I know all that.“这些我全都知道。

”Then why did you invite a friend for supper?“那你为什么还要邀请朋友回来吃晚饭?”Because the poor fools thinking about getting married.“因为那个可怜的笨蛋正考虑要结婚呢。

关于初一简单的英语笑话

关于初一简单的英语笑话运用唱歌、笑话这种形式进行初中英语教学,能够培养学生学习英语的兴趣,让他们在愉快,轻松的氛围中获得知识。

下面是店铺整理的关于初一简单的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!关于初一简单的英语笑话篇一小白兔买面包One day a little white rabbit went to a bakery and asked, "Have you got 100 buns?"一天有只小白兔来到面包店问：“请问你们有100个小面包吗?”The shopkeeper answered, "Sorry, we don't have that many."老板回答：“抱歉我们没有那么多。

”"Oh, that's a pity!" said the rabbit and left, disappointed.“哦，太遗憾了。

”小白兔失望地离开了。

The second day the little white rabbit went to the bakery again and asked, "Have you got 100 buns?"第二天小白兔又来到那个面包店问：“请问你们有100个小面包吗?”The shopkeeper again answered, "Sorry, we don't have that many."老板仍回答：“抱歉我们没有那么多。

”"Oh, it's a pity," said the rabbit, and again left, disappointed.“哦，太遗憾了。

”小白兔又失望地离开了。

The third day the little white rabbit went again to the bakery and asked, "Have you got 100 buns?"第三天小白兔依然来到那家面包店，问：“请问你们有100个小面包吗?”"Oh, yes we have 100 buns today!" the shopkeeper answered gladly.“啊是的，今天我们有100个小面包啦!”老板高兴地回答。

初中英语幽默笑话三则

初中英语幽默笑话三则“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。

”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。

下面店铺为大家带来初中英语幽默笑话三则，希望大家喜欢!初中英语幽默笑话1：A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain; and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party after all. In as much as her husband didn't know what costume she'd be wearing, she thought she'd have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she wasn't around.She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every chick he could, getting a little kiss here and a warm squeeze there. His wife went up to him and being rather seductive herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to this new babe who had just arrived.She let him do whatever he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and they did it all! Zowie! Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would have for hisbehavior.She was sitting up reading when he came in. She asked how the evening had been? He said "Oh, the same old thing. You know, I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"He replied, "You know, I didn't dance even one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening.But I'll tell you...from what I heard, the guy I loaned my costume to, sure had a real good time!"妻子睡了一小会儿后觉得自己好多了。

七年级的英语笑话

七年级的英语笑话一、进错教室某一天，新学期开始，七年级的小明迷迷糊糊地来到了新的教室。

他还没有适应新的环境，也没有记住新的同学们的名字。

于是，他就坐到了一个弄错的座位上。

小明坐在了班级的最后一排。

坐在他旁边的是一位女同学，名字是Lucy。

小明觉得这个女孩看起来很友好，于是他想打个招呼。

他以为这个女同学是在说英语，所以他试着用英语跟她说话：“Hello, Lucy! How are you?”Lucy听到小明的问候，她看了看小明，想了想，然后用中文回答道：“我很好，谢谢你。

不过，你知道吗？我们这是数学课，不是英语课。

”小明顿时感到尴尬，他小心翼翼地低下了头。

他意识到自己走进了错误的教室，而且还在不同的科目上开口说错了话。

二、发音困惑在七年级的英语课上，老师教大家学习拼读单词。

有一天，轮到小明去黑板前读一个单词。

他站在黑板前，手中拿着粉笔，紧张地注视着黑板上的单词。

这个单词是"knife"（刀），看起来很简单，发音也很简单。

然而，当小明读出这个单词时，他错误地读成了“k-n-i-f-e”（凯、娜、哎、爱），而不是正确的发音“n-aɪ-f”。

全班同学都忍不住笑了起来，老师也不禁笑了起来。

小明红着脸，感到非常尴尬。

他下意识地摸了摸自己的脸，希望能快点解脱。

三、问答环节一天，小明在英语课上举手提问老师：“老师，我有个问题，你能回答我吗？”老师微笑着回答：“当然可以，小明，请问你有什么问题？”小明问道：“老师，为什么英语里有一些单词的拼写和发音是不一样的？这让我很困惑。

”老师耐心地解释道：“小明，英语是一个源于多种语言的复杂语言，它沿袭了不同语言的元素，导致了拼写和发音之间的差别。

这是英语的特点之一。

所以，我们要通过学习和记忆来逐渐掌握这些规则。

”小明听了老师的解释，点点头，似乎理解了一些。

他决定更加努力学习英语，争取早日掌握这门语言。

四、英语翻译一天，七年级英语课上，老师提出一个新的任务。

初中英语小笑话

初中英语小笑话笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。

小编精心收集了初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!初中英语小笑话篇1Stan: I won 92 goldfish.斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。

Fred: Where are you going to keep them?弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们?Stan: In the bathroom.斯丹：浴室。

Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办?Stan: Blindfold(蒙眼睛) them!斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛!初中英语小笑话篇2Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their earsfrom popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, "I'mmeeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?"当空中小姐给乘客们发口香糖的时候，她解释说口香糖有助于他们防止耳鸣。

飞机着陆后，一位乘客跑到这位空中小姐面前，说道：“ 我马上就要见到我妻子了。

我怎么才能把口香糖从耳朵里面取出来呢?”初中英语小笑话篇3One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered.“ May I speak to your parents? ”“ They'rebusy. ”“ Oh. Is anybody else there? ”“ The police. ”“ Can I speak to them? ”“ They're busy. ”“Oh. Is anybody else there? ”“ The firemen. ”“ Can Ispeak to them? ”“ They're busy. ”“ S o let meget this straight -- your parents, the police, and the firemen are there, but they're all busy?What are they doing? ”“ Looking for me. ”电话铃响了，小男孩接了电话。

关于八年级英语笑话大全

关于八年级英语笑话大全笑话是一种言语体裁,笑话中蕴含丰富的文化元素,这些文化元素通常以文化特色词的形式表现出来。

下面是店铺整理的关于八年级英语笑话，欢迎阅读!关于八年级英语笑话篇一Are you a normal person?你精神正常吗?During a visit to the mental asylum,a visitor asked the director, 'What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized?''Well...' said the director, 'we fill up a bathtub,and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup,and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub.'Oh,I understand,n said the visitor. 'A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup.'Noooooooo! n answered the director. 'A normal person would pull the plug.'一个参观者在参观一所精神病院的时候问院长，”你们是用什么标准来决定一个人是否应该进精神病院呢?””哦……¨院长说，“是这样，我们先给一个浴缸放满水，然后我们给病人一个茶匙，一个茶杯和一个水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清。

“哦，我明白了¨，参观者说，”正常人会选择水桶，因为水桶比茶匙和茶杯的容积大。

””错了”，院长回答道，正常人会把浴缸塞子拔掉。