经典英文笑话
搞笑英文段子带翻译
下面是一些搞笑的英文段子,附带中文翻译,希望能给大家带来一些欢乐。
1. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
你怎么称呼穿着马甲的鳄鱼?
An investigator.
侦探鱼。
2. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
清洁工从壁橱里跳出来时说了什么?
“Suppliesu get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
如果你把雪人和狗交叉,会得到什么?
Frostbite.
冻伤。
6. What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
青蛙的车出故障会发生什么?
It gets toad away.
它会被拖走。
7. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
海鸥为什么不飞越海湾?
Because then they’d be bagels!
因为那样它们就会成为贝果!
希望这些段子能给你带来欢乐,不过记得要根据具体情况来使用,要适时适地讲笑话哦!
为什么骷髅不互相打架?
They don’t have the guts.
因为它们没有胆量。
3. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?
如果你把雪人和吸血鬼交叉,你得到什么?
Frostbite.
冻伤。
4. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
读英文的笑话
读英文的笑话笑话1:Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!笑话2:Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!笑话3:I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.笑话4:I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!笑话5:I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, "They're right behind you!"笑话6:Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!笑话7:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话8:I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.笑话9:I saw a wino eating grapes. I told him, "You have to wait!"笑话10:I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.笑话11:Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!笑话12:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话13:My friend told me that I should be more optimistic. I said, "Okay, I'm positive!"笑话14:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话15:Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them!笑话16:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!笑话17:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话18:I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.笑话19:I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.笑话20:Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!笑话21:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话22:What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!笑话23:Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!笑话24:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话25:Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!笑话26:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话27:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话28:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话29:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话30:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!以上是30个英文笑话的集合,希望你能通过阅读它们,享受一段愉快的时光并大笑一番!笑话的目的是为了带给我们快乐和轻松,让我们忘记生活中的压力和烦恼。
经典英语冷笑话12篇
经典英语冷笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的经典英语冷笑话12篇,以供大家学习参考。
经典英语冷笑话:小心有狗!As a stranger entered a little country store, he noticed a sign warning, "Danger! Beware of dog!" posted on the glass door. Inside, he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. "Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" he asked the owner. "Yep, that's him," came the reply. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner explained, "Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him!"一名陌生人走进一家乡间小商店,看到玻璃门上帖着的一个告示牌上写着,“危险! 小心有狗!” 进去后,他看到一条样子一点都不凶的老狗趴在收款机旁边的地板上睡觉。
“这就是大伙都得留神的那只狗啊?” 陌生人问店主。
“是,就是他”,店主回答。
听到这个回答,陌生人觉得很好笑。
“我觉得那条狗一点都不可怕。
英文冷笑话
英文冷笑话英文冷笑话,是一种让人感到微妙的幽默。
它不是那种让人大笑的搞笑,而是一种让人感到好笑却又无法表达的感觉。
在这篇文章中,我们将介绍一些英文冷笑话,希望能让你感受到这种微妙的幽默。
1. Why did the tomato turn red?Because it saw the salad dressing!这个笑话的意思是,番茄变红是因为它看到了沙拉酱,而沙拉酱通常是用来和番茄一起吃的。
这个笑话的幽默点在于它的意外性和无厘头。
2. Why did the chicken cross the playground?To get to the other slide!这个笑话的意思是,鸡穿过游乐场是为了到达另一个滑梯。
这个笑话的幽默点在于它的双关语,'slide' 既可以指滑梯,也可以指幻灯片。
3. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?Because it felt crummy!这个笑话的意思是,饼干去看医生是因为它感觉不好。
这个笑话的幽默点在于它的双关语,'crummy' 既可以指不好的感觉,也可以指饼干的质地。
4. Why did the bicycle fall over?Because it was two-tired!这个笑话的意思是,自行车倒下是因为它太累了。
这个笑话的幽默点在于它的双关语,'two-tired' 既可以指太累了,也可以指自行车有两个轮子。
5. Why did the banana go to the doctor?Because it wasn't peeling well!这个笑话的意思是,香蕉去看医生是因为它的剥皮不太好。
这个笑话的幽默点在于它的双关语,'peeling' 既可以指剥皮,也可以指身体的状况。
6. Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!这个笑话的意思是,稻草人获得了奖项是因为他在他的领域里非常杰出。
英语幽默笑话
英语幽默笑话笑话一:一只鸟的英语水平有一只鸟飞到了一家语言学校的窗户上,看到窗户上写着:“免费学习英语,从零开始。
”于是,它翘起了尾巴,挺起了胸脯,然后大声地说道:“Polly wants a cracker!”(小鹦鹉想要个饼干!)这时,里面的老师听到了声音,走过来看窗户,发现了一只鸟。
老师开玩笑说:“你来这里学习英语吗?”鸟点点头。
老师继续说:“那你可以念一句英文的经典名言吗?”鸟听后想了一下,然后顺利地说道:“Early to bed, early to rise, makes abird healthy, wealthy, and wise!”(早睡早起使鸟健康、富有和聪明!)老师忍不住惊讶地说:“哇,你的英语真是棒极了!你是怎么学会的?”鸟笑着回答:“Well, actually I learned English from none other than Polly the Parrot!”(嗯,其实我是从鹦鹉波利那里学的英语!)笑话二:失踪的手机一天晚上,一位英国中学生在回家的路上,不小心将他的手机掉在了路上。
等他发现手机丢了,已经回到家了,于是他告诉他的爸爸发生了什么事情。
爸爸安慰他说:“别担心,我帮你打个电话,看看能不能找到手机。
”于是爸爸打了个电话,手机立刻就响了起来,但是声音却传来的十分奇怪。
爸爸听后说:“嗨,我是XX的爸爸。
你找到了我儿子的手机吗?”手机那头传来一个陌生的声音:“是的,我找到了。
你是他爸爸吗?”爸爸回答:“是的,我是他爸爸。
”手机那头的声音又问:“那你能告诉我他的厕所在哪里吗?我正躲在这儿接你的电话呢!”笑话三:英语课上的问题一天在英语课上,老师问学生们一个问题:“如果今天是过去的昨天,明天是过去的明天,那么今天是星期几?”结果所有的学生都陷入了沉思,似乎没有一个学生能够回答出这个问题。
就在这时,一个学生举手回答道:“老师,今天是星期二。
”老师听后很惊讶地问他:“为什么你认为今天是星期二?”学生回答:“因为我们是星期一上的英语课!”笑话四:一个有趣的对话一位美国人和一位英国人在一家酒吧里坐在一起,开始聊天。
关于英语的简单笑话大全
关于英语的简单笑话大全超简短的5个英文笑话 1.Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. 老师:谁能回到我下一个问题,谁就可以回家了。
One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。
Teacher: who just threw that?!老师:谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩:我!我现在要回家了。
2.What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高?Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗,大楼又跳不起来。
3.What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾,但是没有身体?A coin!硬币。
4.What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛,却看不见?A needle.针。
5.Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子:你会怎么形容我呢?Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫:ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子:那是什么意思?Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."丈夫:迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子:哇,谢谢,但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫:开个玩笑!1.One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"一天,有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子,也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。
爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译
爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译近年来,冷笑话作为一种新兴的语言现象在网络、杂志上十分盛行。
我细心收集了爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译,供大家欣赏学习!爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译:还没那么急Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctors consulting-room. "Doctor,' he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago.' "Good heavens, man!' said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why dont you come to me on the day you swallowed it?' "To tell you the truth, Doctor,' the poor man replied, "I didnt need the money so badly then.'一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。
"大夫!' 他说,"帮帮我!一个月前我吞了一分硬币!' "天哪,' 大夫说," 早干嘛去了?你当时怎么不来看?' "实话告知您吧,大夫,'穷人说,"我当时还不缺钱!'爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译:老夫妻吵嘴A couple of codgers got into a quarrel and came before the local magistrate. The loser,turning to his opponent in a combative frame of mind, cried: Ill law you to the CircuitCourt.一对性情乖僻的老夫妻发生了争吵,始终闹到地方法官那里。
爆笑的英文小笑话大全笑死人
爆笑的英文小笑话大全笑死人笑话一般是短小精悍、句子结构紧凑、运用艺术手段造成巨大的夸张和想象,使矛盾发展到最尖锐的地步,然后突然得到意外的解决,从而生成强烈的喜剧效果。
小编精心收集了爆笑的英文小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!爆笑的英文小笑话篇1骗子,骗子A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.老婆与隔壁邻居到警察局报案说她的老公失踪了。
The policeman asked her for a description.警察要求,她形容一下。
She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."她说:“他三十五岁,六尺四寸,黑眼睛,波浪状的深色头发;体格健壮,体重185磅,说话很轻,而且对小孩子很好。
”The next-door neighbor protested,隔壁邻居期提出反驳说:"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."“你老公五尺四寸,胖嘟嘟的,秃头,有一个太嘴巴,而且对你的小孩很刻薄。
”The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"老婆回答说:“你说对了,可是谁会要这种没用的废物回来呀?”爆笑的英文小笑话篇2怕老婆的老公A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to asserthimself.有一位怕老婆的老公接受心理治疗师的建议要坚持自己的主见。
简单易懂的英文小笑话欣赏
简单易懂的英文小笑话欣赏笑话大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象,具有讽刺性和娱乐性。
店铺整理了简单易懂的英文小笑话,欢迎阅读!简单易懂的英文小笑话篇一Look at My Socks瞧瞧我的袜子"Say, that's an interesting pair of socks you've got on, Charlie, one green and one red. "“嘿,查理,你穿的这双袜子真有趣,一只绿色一只红色。
”"Yeah, and I've got another pair just like it at home."“是吗,我家里还有一双同样的袜子呢。
”简单易懂的英文小笑话篇二许个愿吧Every morning on his way to work, a business man passed a house where he saw a woman beating her looy on the head with a loaf of bread.每天早晨一位商人在上班途中都会经过一户人家,他总是看见一个女人用一条面包打她儿子的头部。
But on this particular day, he noticed that she was hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake.但今天却比较特别,他发现她正用一块巧克力蛋糕打他的头。
Unable to restrain his curiosity, he rang the doorbell and the woman answere .他忍不住好奇,便按了那户人家的门铃。
女人听了铃声,出来开门。
"Madam, I couldn't help but notice that every day you beat your child with a loaf of bread. . . "“这位太太,每天经过这里我都忍不住会注意到你用一条面包打你儿子……”"That's true .""那倒是不假……""And yet today I observed that you were hitting him with a piece of chocolate cake. ',"可是今天我却看见你用一块巧克力蛋糕打他。
英语搞笑笑话8篇
英语搞笑笑话8篇下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话8篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话:Imitation 模仿A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. Well, sit down and eat your tea, said his mother. Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got something in it.Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache.That's because it's empty, said his bright son. You'd be all right if you had something in it.一个男孩放学回家时,觉得肚子痛。
来,坐下,吃点点心,妈妈说,你肚子痛是因为肚子是空的。
吃点东西就会好的。
一会儿,男孩的爸爸下班回家了,说是头痛。
你头痛是因为你的脑袋是空的,他那聪明的儿子说,里面装点东西,就会好的。
英语搞笑笑话:Fried chickenIn class the teacher showed pictures of various birds. Then he asked one of the students, "What kind of bird do you like best, Jack?"Jack thought a moment, then answered, "Fried chicken, sir."老师在课堂上向学生们展示了各种各样的鸟的照片。
然后他问其中一名学生,“杰克,你最喜欢哪种鸟儿啊?”杰克想了想,回答,“炸鸡,老师。
[11则英文爆笑故事]英文笑话带翻译爆笑
[11则英文爆笑故事]英文笑话带翻译爆笑11则英文爆笑故事11则英文爆笑故事英文爆笑故事1:Workman:“Mr.Brown,I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages. I have just been married.” Employer:“Very sorry,my dear man,but I can“t helpyou. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside thefactory we are not responsible.” 工人:“布朗先生,我想请您给我加一点工资。
我刚刚结了婚。
” 雇主:“非常抱歉,老兄,但是我无能为力。
对工人在厂外发生的事故我们概不负责。
” 英文爆笑故事2:Seth Smith was reckoned the laziest man in town. Sotired had the authorities become of contributing to his supportthat they decided to consign him to a living tomb. Accordinglyhe was prepared for burial. The hearse was an old ramshacklecountry wagon. As the strange cortege moved along some old residentasked,“Who is it” “Why,Seth Smith,who is too lazy to get anything to liveon,so we are going to bury him alive.” “I“ll give him a bushel of corn,” said one.“And I will,”said another. Slowly raising his head,Seth asked:“Is the corn shelled,neighbor” “No,you must do that yourself.” Gently replacing his head,he said:“ Drive on,boys,drive on.” 塞思·史密斯被公认为镇上头号懒人。
英语小笑话带翻译
英语小笑话带翻译英语小笑话带翻译(精选12篇)笑话具有篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。
下面是店铺为大家整理的关于英语的小笑话带翻译,欢迎大家的阅读。
英语小笑话带翻译篇1He is really somebody-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.-- He is really somebody. What does he do?-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.他真是一个大人物-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。
-- 他真是一个大人物。
干什么的?-- 墓地守墓人。
英语小笑话带翻译篇2Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。
在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏
20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏一些幽默的英语笑话,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享20个英语笑话爆笑超短,希望大家喜欢这些英语笑话!20个英语笑话爆笑超短篇一1.Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。
”“不要相信梦,亲爱的。
据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。
”妈妈答道。
“那么,我真希望在今晚的梦中,我的其他功课都不及格。
”汤姆说。
2.On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。
经典英语笑话6篇
经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。
下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一:我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说:“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。
我妻子是财政部长。
我岳母是作战部长,我女儿是外交秘书。
”“听上去挺有意思的,”他的同事说,“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。
我要做的一切就是付钱。
”英语笑话二:喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭,父亲把服务生叫了过来。
英文小笑话集锦
英文小笑话集锦1、它咬人吗Does He BiteReggie:We have got a new dog. Would you like to come around and play with him?Ron: Well, I don't know---does he bite?Reggie: That's what I want to find out.里基:我们又得到了一条新狗,你愿意过来和他玩一会吗?罗恩:嗯,我不知道----它咬人吗?里基:这正是我想要查明的。
2、两块蛋糕Two Pieces of CakeTom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?Mom: Certainly----take this piece and cut it two!汤姆:妈妈,我可以吃两块蛋糕吗?妈妈:当然可以----拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧!3、不算太坏Not too BadDid you sell any of your paintings at the art show?""No, but I am encouraged," he replied. "Somebody stole one."“你的画在美术展上有卖出去吗?”“没有,但我还是受到了鼓励,”他回答说,“有人偷走了一幅。
”4、A Silly Father 傻爸爸Mr. White was watching TV when his eight-year-old son came into the room. He cried, Father, my grandpa just now slapped me in the face. Hearing that, Mr. White became veryangry. And then he suddenly boxed his own ears heavily and said, You beat my son and I dare to beat yours.怀特先生在房间里看电视,他八岁的儿子走进来哭着说:爸爸,刚才爷爷打了我一耳光。
带英文的笑话
带英文的笑话在这个快节奏的现代社会,幽默和轻松的笑话成为人们日常生活中减压的良药。
而带有英文元素的笑话则给人们带来了一种跨文化的娱乐享受。
下面我将分享几个带有英文的笑话,让大家一起愉快地笑一笑。
1.美食烦恼Two friends were chatting about their favorite food.Friend 1: "I love Italian food!"Friend 2: "Oh, me too! Pizza, pasta, tiramisu...they are all so delicious!"Friend 1: "Agreed! But you know what's even harder? Trying to lose weight while loving Italian food!"Friend 2: "Haha, that's true! Italian food is a carb-enigma!"这个笑话描绘了两个朋友在讨论美食的时候的对话。
他们都喜欢意大利菜,但同时又面临着减肥的困扰。
其中的“carb-enigma”(碳水化合物之谜)一词将意大利美食的高碳水化合物含量与减肥的矛盾巧妙地结合在一起,让人忍俊不禁。
2.熊猫的英语A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air."Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it overhis shoulder."I'm a panda," he says, at the door. "Look it up."The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."这个笑话讲述了一只熊猫走进咖啡馆,吃完三明治后拔枪朝天开了两枪,然后辞别离开。
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
2. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
怎么让纸巾跳舞呢?你往上放点音乐
3. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是生活中的调剂品,能够给人带来欢乐和放松。而英文笑话更是不同国家和地区都能理解的笑话形式,让人们在跨国交流中也能共享欢乐。下面就给大家带来一些经典的英文笑话,并附上中文翻译,一起来欣赏一下吧!
1. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
你怎样称呼不是你的奶酪呢?墨西哥煎玉米饼奶酪。
6. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
我告诉我妻子她应该接受自己的错误,她给了我一个拥抱。
以上是一些笑话不仅仅能给我们带来快乐,还能锻炼我们的英语听力和理解能力。希望大家在学习英语的道路上能够轻松愉快,充满笑声!
听说游乐场有绑架事件吗?他们醒来了。
4. Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
为什么骷髅不打架呢?因为他们没有胆量。
5. What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.