湖北省黄冈市高考英语作文训练题连载(9)(1)

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湖北省黄冈市2014高考英语作文训练题连载(9)及参考范文
【广东省茂名市二模】
基础写作 (共1小题,满分15分)
假设你的同学因自己的肥胖而苦恼,请根据以下建议写一篇英语短文。

[写作内容]
Don’ts Dos
不要吃过多油腻的食物;睡觉前不要吃零食。

否则可能增加体重或消化不良(indigestion)。

要保持均衡饮食;每天需要至少一个小时的运动,比如可以选择步行上学,这样既有利于减肥,又可以保护环境。

做到持之以恒,只有这样才会在不久的将来拥有苗条的身材。

[写作要求]
1. 只能使用5个句子表达全部内容;
2. 首句已经给出,不计入总句数。

[评分标准]
句子结构准确,信息内容完整,篇章连贯。

Dear classmate,
I’ve learned that you are trying to lose weight and I am glad to give you some suggestions.
________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________
【参考范文】基础写作 (共1小题,满分15分)
I’ve learned that you are trying to lose weight and I am glad to give you some suggestions.
On (the) one hand, you shouldn't eat too much fatt y food or eat snacks before you sleep. Otherwise, you may gain weight or suffer from indigestio n. On the other hand, you should keep a balanced diet. Meanwhile, doing exercise for at least one hour per day is needed, like walking to school, which is not only beneficial for your weight loss, but also helps protect the environment.
Above all, you should be persistent, because only in this way can you become slim in the near future.
【陕西省西安市长安一中2014第二次模拟】书面表达(满分30分)
假定你是中学生李华。

在国外中学生贴吧上看到一位名叫Slowstudent的中学生的帖子,你看到如下内容。

请你根据帖子内容、写作要点和要求跟帖。

写作要点:
1. 表明自己的看法;
2. 陈述自己的理由(可举例说明);
3. 提出至少两条建议。

要求:
1. 短文须写在答题卡的指定区域。

2. 短文词数不少于100(不含已写好的部分)。

3. 内容充实,结构完整,语意连贯。

4. 书写需清晰、工整。

Slow Comments
_______________
_______________________________________Parents ’meeting panics slow student
student
A parents ’meeting is always meaning a complaints meeting to a slow student.
My parents will scold me whenever they come back from it. Now the mid -term
exam is over and another terrible parenets ’meeting is around the corner. What
shall I do? Help!
Sign in or register to comment and rate comments.
All posts are pre-moderated and must obey the house rules .
Dear Slowstudent,
This is really a tough nut to crack. In my opinion,
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
______________________________________
Yours,Li Hua
【参考范文】书面表达(满分30分)(One possible version)
Slowstudent,
This is really a tough nut to crack. In my opinion, you should not be afraid of a parents ’ meeting; instead, you ’d better take a proper attitude to it.
In fact, a parent s’ meeting is for the most part a communication meeting, where teachers and parent s exchange information and opinions about students ’ situations at school and home, which is beneficial to improve teaching quality.
As for your problem, I think you can have a good talk with your parents and teachers. While talking with your parents, you can focus on how hard you study (if it is the
case) and why you failed this time or even ask them to help analyze your failure. When talking with your teachers, better ask them for the law of each subject and effective methods of learning them. Anyhow, improving your grades is the key to solving the problem.
Yours,
Li Hua
(Another possible version)
Slowstudent,
This is really a tough nut to crack. In my opinion, if you use your head a little bit, it is easy to deal with. Let me put it clearer. Now that parents’ meetings bring troubles and unhappiness to you, that would be okay if there were no such kind o f meeting. It is impossible for you to forbid your school or your class to hold a parents’ meeting, but you can “forbid” your parents to attend the meeting. How? One way is not telling your parents there will be a parents’ meeting. Another is trying to say something bad about the meeting (say, the meeting is intended for nothing but to collect money) so that your parents h ate to go to it. These approaches prove effective, for I am as slow a student as you.
Yours,
Li Hua
【2013界广东省揭阳市一模】
读写任务 (共1小题,满分25分)
阅读下面的短文,然后按照要求写一篇150词左右的英语短文。

Once upon a time in a land far far away, there was a wonderful old man who loved everything. Animals, spiders, insects...
One day while walk ing through the woods t he ni ce old man found a cocoon(茧) of a butterfly. He took it home.
A few days later, a small opening appeared; he sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther.
Then the man decided to help the butterfly, so he took a pair of scissors and cut off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then came out easily.
But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled (萎缩的) wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body. Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling aro und with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.
What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were Nature's way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon. Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we were allowed to go
through our life without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. And we could never fly.
[写作内容]
1. 以约30词概括短文内容要点;
2. 以约120词就“个人成长需要艰难生活的磨砺”这一话题发表你的看法,并包含以下要点:
(1) 你读了这个故事后的感受;
(2) 叙述当前父母溺爱子女的现象和由此造成的后果;
(3) 假如你是父母一方,你会如何磨砺自己的孩子?
[写作要求]
1.可以使用实例或其他论述方法支持你的论点,也可以参照阅读材料的内容,但不得直接引用原文中句子;
2. 文中不能出现考生真实姓名和学校名称。

[评分标准]
概括准确,语言规范,内容合适,篇章连贯。

【参考范文】读写任务(共1小题,满分25分)参考范文
One possible version:
A kind man cut a cocoon open in order to lessen the pain of a butterfly when he saw it struggling out of the cocoon, only to find that it could never fly because of his help. (37 words)
The story sets me thinking. Our life is more or less like this. Sometimes, struggles or obstacles in our life are a must for our growth. It is these struggles or obstacles that increase our willpower and contribute to our success. Without these trials, we could never achieve our life goal just as the butterfly did in the story. Nowadays, with only one child in most families, parents do whatever they can to satisfy the child’s needs and even do for him what should be done by himself. Consequently, the child is unable to look after himself without his parents’ presence. Too much care from parents deprives children of chances to grow strong by conquering obstacles. Just as a saying goes, “Flowers from a greenhouse can never withstand a storm”. If I were a p arent, I would first keep him well informed that life is never easy and that he should be ready to face any difficulties. Besides, I would expose him to the hardships in life instead of protecting him from difficulties, provid ing them with chances to fight for his bright future by conquering challenges.
读写任务评分说明:
本试题要求考生阅读一篇英语短文之后就“个人成长需要艰难生活的磨砺”这一主题进行议论,内容包括:(1) 你读了这个故事后的感受;(2) 叙述当前父母溺爱子女的现象和由此造成的后果;(3) 假如你是父母一方,你会如何磨砺自己的孩子?
在评分时,应注意以下几个方面:
1.按照评分标准,实行分析综合法评分。

2.概括应包含以下要点:
(1)A kind old man saw a butterfly struggling out of the cocoon.
(2)The old man cut the cocoon open in order to lessen its p ain.
(3)The old man found that the butterfly could never fly because of his help. 3. 写作的内容应该包括:
(1)正确表达“感受”, 如“发人深省”。

(2)能描述当前父母溺爱子女的现象和由此造成的后果, 如“过度依赖父母, 缺乏独立能力”。

(3)就“假如你是父母一方,你会如何磨砺自己的孩子?” 发表自己的看法。

4. 其它要求见评分标准。

【写作评分标准】读写任务
[评分说明] 读写任务的评分建议采用综合法,即:根据总体影响给分。

概要和文章的分值
项目赋

评分标准
概括5
按照要求概括了原文的主要信息,没有增加与原文无关的信息,语言结构正确,行文规范。

4
基本按照要求概括了原文的主要信息,没有增加与原文无关的信息。

语言结构正确,行文规范。

3
基本按照要求概括了原文的主要信息,但包含一些不相关的信息。

语言结构基本正确,行文比较规范。

2
不能按照要求概括了原文的主要信息,包含较多不相关的信息。

语言结构不够准确,行文不够规范。

0-1
没有按照要求概括原文的主要信息,基本是不相关的信息。

语言结构不准确,行文不规范。

写作18-20
包含题目所给全部或绝大部分的内容要点。

主题明确,内容丰富。

词汇丰富,用词得当。

能有效运用合适的语言结构,而且没有(或极少)语法错误。

篇章结构的连贯性好。

14-17
包含题目所给全部或绝大部分的内容要点。

主题明确,个别内容不准确或者不相关。

词汇较丰富,有个别用词错误。

较好地运用了合适的语言结构,有少许的语法错误。

篇章结构的连贯性较好。

11-13
包含题目所给全部或绝大部分的内容要点。

主题比较明确,个别内容不准确或者不相关。

词汇较丰富,有一定的用词错误。

较好地运用了合适的语言结构,有少许的语法错误。

篇章结构的连贯性较好。

7-10
包含题目所给的部分内容要点。

主题基本明确,有些内容不准确或者不相关。

词汇有限,有较多的用词错误。

语言结构出现较多的语法错误。

篇章结构的连贯性一般。

4-6
只包含题目所给的个别内容要点。

多数内容不相关或者不准确。

文章有些地方照抄原文。

词汇贫乏,有较多的用词错误。

大多数的句子出现语法错误。

篇章结构的连贯性差。

1-3
只包含与题目所给要点内容有关的一些单词。

主题不明确,文章基本照抄原文。

词汇极其贫乏,基本不能正确用词。

几乎没有正确的句子。

篇章结构零乱。

以下几种情况,给0分:
1)完全抄袭原文(或其它文章)
2)文不对题
3)只写一些零散的单词,完全没有表达完整的内容。

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