形容公司削苹果流程的段子

形容公司削苹果流程的段子
英文回答：
In the annals of corporate bureaucracy, the humble act of peeling an apple has been transformed into a
labyrinthine odyssey. Once a simple task, it has become an elaborate ritual, fraught with layers of approvals, endless documentation, and an army of designated personnel.
Enter the illustrious "Apple Peeling Protocol," a masterpiece of bureaucratic engineering that would make Kafka blush. It begins with a formal requisition, submitted to a designated "Fruit Procurement Manager." Upon approval, a specialized team of "Apple Inspectors" is dispatched to the vendor's premises to meticulously screen each apple for imperfections.
Once the apples pass inspection, they embark on a perilous journey through the "Apple Preparation Department." Here, they are subjected to a rigorous
sanitization process, complete with ultrasonic baths and sterile wipe-downs. With surgical precision, the apples are then quartered and meticulously peeled, using a state-of-the-art "Apple Peeler 4000."
But this is merely the tip of the bureaucratic iceberg. The peeled apple quarters are then transported to a separate "Apple Quality Assurance Division," where they undergo a battery of tests to ensure their structural integrity and aesthetic appeal. Only those that meet the exacting standards of the "Apple Appearance Committee" are deemed worthy of consumption.
The final stage of this epic process involves the distribution of the peeled apple quarters. This task is entrusted to the "Apple Distribution Logistics Team," who maintain a complex inventory and dispatch schedules to ensure that every employee receives their fair share of the coveted fruit.
In this bureaucratic wonderland, the once-simple act of peeling an apple has been transformed into a testament to
the boundless creativity of corporate overcomplication. It
is a tale of wasted time, resources, and common sense, a triumph of form over function that would leave even the
most seasoned bureaucrat scratching their head in disbelief.
中文回答：
公司的削苹果流程简直就是官僚主义的杰作，堪称一场苹果冒
险之旅。

苹果削皮议定书堪称官僚主义工程的典范，让人不禁吟诵一句
卡夫卡的名言。

流程伊始，需要向水果采购经理提交正式申请。

获
批后，一支专门的苹果检验员团队会被派往供应商处，对每只苹果
进行细致的瑕疵筛查。

通过检验的苹果便踏上了一段充满危险的旅程，进入苹果准备
部门。

在那里，它们将接受严格的消毒程序，包括超声波浴和无菌
擦拭。

随后，苹果将被切成四块，并使用最先进的苹果削皮器 4000 精心削皮。

这仅仅是官僚主义冰山的一角。

削完皮的苹果块会被运往独立
的苹果质量保证部门，接受一系列测试，以确保其结构完整性和美
观性。

只有那些符合苹果外观委员会严格标准的苹果才能被认为合格。

这个史诗般流程的最后阶段涉及削皮苹果块的分配。

这项任务被委托给苹果配送物流团队，他们会维护一个复杂的库存和配送时间表，以确保每位员工都能获得公平份额的苹果。

在这个官僚主义的仙境中，削苹果这一曾经简单的行为已经变成了公司过度复杂化的创造力见证。

这是一个关于时间、资源和常识浪费的故事，一项形式优先于功能的伟大胜利，任何经验丰富的官僚都会对此惊讶不已。