最新整理英文笑话带翻译爆笑
英语经典幽默笑话及翻译
英语经典幽默笑话及翻译笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。
下面店铺为大家带来英语经典幽默笑话及翻译，希望大家喜欢!英语经典幽默笑话1：There was once a large，fat woman who had a small，thin husband. He had a job in a big company and was given his weekly wages every Friday evening. As soon as he got home on Fridays，his wife used to make hirn give her all his money，and then she used to give him back only enough to buy his lunch in the office every day.曾有一位块儿大、膘肥的女人，她的丈夫却是瘦小、干瘪。
丈夫是在一家大公司做事。
每到周五晚上领到工资，也正是周五这位丈夫回家时，老婆就让他把所有钱都交出来，然后再给他一点儿在办公室吃午饭的钱。
One day the small man came home very excited. He hurried into the living-room. His wife was listening to the radio and eating chocolates.”You'll never guess what happened to me today，dear,"he said. He waited for a few seconds and then added:“I won ten thousand pounds on the lottery!”一天，这位小丈夫回到家，兴奋得不得了。
他匆匆忙忙地来到起居室。
超短的英语笑话带翻译笑死
超短的英语笑话带翻译笑死一直以来民间的笑话、笑料题材，比比皆是，可以汇编成专集。
小编精心收集了超短的英语笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!超短的英语笑话带翻译篇1Two boys are talking with each other.两个孩子正在交谈。
"You see, in the old times there were no electricity, no radios, no televisions. How could ourancestors survive?"“你想，古代没有电，没有收音机，也没有电视。
我们的祖先怎么能活着呢?”"So they all died."“所以他们都死了。
”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇2Jenny's papa bought her a pair of new trousers, but it couldn't be worn as it shrank in the wash. Her mother got angry.詹妮的爸爸给她新买了一条裤子，但刚一下水就缩得不能穿了。
她的妈妈非常生气。
But Jenny said. "Mama, I can wear it if you have me a bath."詹妮却说：“妈妈，你给我洗个澡，我就能穿了。
”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇3The neighbor often borrowed my inflator.邻居经常借我家的打气筒。
One day, my four-year-old daughter suddenly told me:"Papa, what shall we do if the air of our inflator is used up?"有一天，4岁的女儿突然告诉我说：“爸爸，我们的打气筒里面的气用完了怎么办?”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇4"Mama, why does the puppy drink the water in the slot?"“妈妈，小狗为什么要喝水沟里的水?”"Because it's thirsty."“因为它渴了。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]
![20个英语笑话爆笑超短【英语翻译笑话】[修改版]](https://img.taocdn.com/s3/m/a8884e71ec3a87c24128c47c.png)
1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don"t bird me,i don"t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed i will give you some color to see see,pothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!! 有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．you give me stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知...9．watch sister表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse" son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子大地洞11．american chinese not enough美中不足12．one car e one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：i am sorry!老外：i am sorry too!小明：i am sorry three!老外：what are you sorry for?小明：i am sorry five!16．if you want money,i have no;if you want life,i have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．i call li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。
英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读
英语爆笑笑话6则带翻译双语阅读笑话是指以一句短语或一个小故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，另外一个行动(动作)型的笑话是以动作影响人的视觉及观感，而感到好笑。
下面一起来看一下一些爆笑英语笑话吧。
In music class, the teacher asked Jack: “Please answer me what the oldest musical instrument is.”音乐课上，老师问杰克：“请回答，世界上最古老的乐器是什么?”Jack answered unhesitatingly: “It is the accordion.”杰克坚定地回答：“是手风琴。
”The teacher asked doubtfully: “Why do you say that it is the accordion, my dear boy?”老师疑惑地问：“为什么是手风琴呢，英语笑话我可爱的孩子?”Jack s aid: “Teacher, don’t you see that the accordion is completely covered by wrinkles.”杰克说：“老师，您没看见手风琴上全是皱纹吗?”最好的解释The Best ExplanationOnce in a physics class, Tom’s teacher asked the students: “When it thunders, why do we see the lightning first, then hear the thunders?”一次物理课上，汤姆的老师问同学们：“当打雷的时候，为什么我们先看到闪电，然后才听到雷声呢?”Tom answered the question very quickly, while his classmates were thinking it hard.当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，英语笑话汤姆很快就答了上来。
2024年英语爆笑小笑话带翻译
They always give the bigger piece to the other person. answered his aunt at once.
Oh said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,Cut this cake in half, Catherine..
迪克年龄七岁，他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁。一天，妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩，自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服。
孩子们玩了个把小时，在四点半的.时候，姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房。她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并对他说：喏，迪克，给你刀子，把这块蛋糕一切为二，给你妹妹一块。不过，你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样。
迪克问：像一个绅士?绅士怎样做呢?
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
2024年英语爆笑小笑话带翻译
英语爆笑小笑话带翻译一：How to be like a gentleman
Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
爆笑的英语笑话带翻译精选
爆笑的英语笑话带翻译精选冷笑话作为一种新兴的口头文类,有其鲜明的特色,而现有的定义和分类却把冷笑话作为一种既成文本来加以分析,忽略了其生存语境。
下面是店铺带来的爆笑的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!爆笑的英语笑话带翻译精选(一)我跟她还不熟Not Knowing Her WellWife: Bill, the man in that house opposite always kisses his wife when he leaves in the morning and he kisses her again when he comes back in the evening. Why don't you do that too?妻子：比尔，住在对面那所房子的那个男人早上出门前总要吻一下妻子，晚上回来时再吻一下，你为什么不那样做呢?Husband: Well, I don't know her very well yet.丈夫：哦，我跟她还不是很熟。
(二)袋鼠的能耐 What Kangaroos Can DoThe zoo built a special eight-foot-high enclosure for its newly acquired kangaroo, but the nextmorning the animal was found hopping around outside. The height of the fence was increasedto 15 feet, but the kangaroo got out again. Exasperated, the zoo director had the heightincreased to 30 feet, but the kangaroo still escaped. A giraffe asked the kangaroo, “How highdo you think they’ll build the fence?”动物园为刚引进的袋鼠建了一个特殊的八英尺高的围墙。
爆笑英文笑话带翻译
爆笑英文笑话带翻译爆笑英文笑话带翻译生活中烦心的琐事总是有的，你会有时不愉快，那你就来看笑话吧，开心一笑，烦心事就会溜走了。
以下是爆笑英文笑话带翻译，欢迎阅览!1.One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"一天，有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村，在乡间路上开着车，想看看农庄是什么样子，也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。
这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地上，手中抱着一头猪，并把它举得高高的`，好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。
城里人对农夫说，"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的，但是，这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫回答说，"时间对猪有什么意义?"2.a kiss At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "KISS" scribbled on it. The guest seated next to the speaker said, "Your wife must love you very much, I see her send you a 'KISS' before you begin your speech." The speaker smiled and explained, "You don't know my wife. The 'KISS' she give me stands for 'Keep It Short, Stupid.'"3.The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have aparty.Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment,he said,"Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow.When the door open,push with your foot.""Why use my elbow and foot?""Well,gosh," was the reply,"You're not coming empty-hangded,are you?吝啬鬼请客一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了.他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃.门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开.”“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”“你的双手得拿礼物啊.天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答.I think that I'm a chickenPsychiatrist:What's your problem?Patient:I think I'm a chicken.Psychiatrist:How long has this been going on?Patient:Ever since I was an egg!精神病医师：你哪里不舒服?病人：我认为我是一只鸡.精神病医师：这种情况从什么时候开始的?病人：从我还是一只蛋的时候开始.4.Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安? 老师发问道。
英语笑话带翻译总有一个笑死你
英语笑话带翻译总有一个笑死你英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑，或是产生幽默感，笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言，笑话是一种艺术方法。
下面是店铺整理的英语笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一：How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了，在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人，我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。
孩子们齐声回答：“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂，给院子的草坪割草，并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁，我会上天堂吗?”回答还是：“不能!”“好吧，”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道：“你得死了才行!”英语笑话二：sells the candyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?""I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered."You're a good boy," said the mother proudly."Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested inthe old woman?""She is the one who sells the candy."小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇，欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一：Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。
The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。
过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。
The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上，先生。
”那小男孩说。
英语爆笑笑话二：太黑了，看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。
【爆笑英语小笑话带翻译】 英语小笑话带翻译
【爆笑英语小笑话带翻译】英语小笑话带翻译冷笑话是幽默的一种特殊的表现形式，它与传统的笑话不同，有其独特的产生和理解方式。
小编整理了爆笑英语小笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇一Late one night at the insane asylum ,one inmate shouted, “I am Napoleon!”Another one said, “How do you know?”The first inmate said, “God told me!”Jus t then, a voice from another roomshouted, “I did not!”一天晚上，在疯人院里，一个病人说：”我是拿破仑!”另一个说：”你怎么知道?”第一个人说：”上帝对我说的!”一会儿，一个声音从另一个房间传来：”我没说!”爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇二One day after school the teacher said to his students, “Tomorrow morning, if any one of you can answer my first question, I will permit him or her to go homeearlier.” The next day, when the teacher came into the classroom, he found the blackboard daubed. He was very angry and asked, “Who did it? Please stand up!” “It’s me,” said Bob, “Now, I can go home. Good-bye, Sir.”我可以回家了一天，放学以后，老师对他的学生们说：”明天上午，如果你们当中的任何一个同学能首先回答我的问题，我就准许他或她最先回家。
英汉互译英语小笑话
英汉互译英语小笑话英汉互译英语小笑话笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。
笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。
小编精心收集了英汉互译英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!英汉互译英语小笑话篇1A Half-price Ticket半价票"How much is the movie ticket?"“电影票多少钱一张?”"Ten dollars, kid."“10美元，孩子。
”"I only have five dollars. Please let me in. I'll see it only with one eye."“我只有5美元。
请让我进去吧，我只用一中眼睛看。
”英汉互译英语小笑话篇2Failure in a Test考试不及格Mother: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?妈妈:这次测试你为什么得这么低的分?Kid: Because of absence.孩子:因为缺考。
Mother: You mean you were absent on the day of the test?妈妈：你的意思是考试那天你没去?Kid: No, but the kid who sits next to me was.孩子:不是，是坐在我旁边的孩子没来。
英汉互译英语小笑话篇3The Thinker《思想者》Two boys were admiring the famous statue by Rodin entitled The Thinker.两个男孩正在欣赏罗丹的著名雕塑《思想者》"What do you suppose he's thinking about?’asked one.“你猜他在想什么”其中一个问道。
"I guess he's thinking about where he put his clothes." replied the other.“我猜他是在想他把衣服放在哪里了，”另一个回答说。
带翻译的英语笑话
带翻译的英语笑话笑话一：Coffee OrderA man walks into a coffee shop and says to the barista, "Can I have a coffee, but please make it very strong?"The barista nods and replies, "Sure, I can make it strong. How many coffee beans would you like me to use?"The man thinks for a moment and says, "Well, how about you just wave the coffee beans over the cup and I'll drink the air?"【翻译】一个男人走进咖啡店对咖啡师说：“我可以要一杯咖啡，但是请做得很浓吗？”咖啡师点点头回答：“当然，我可以做得很浓。
你希望我使用多少颗咖啡豆？”男人想了一会儿说：“嗯，你可以只是在杯子上面晃一下咖啡豆，然后我就喝空气好了。
”笑话二：Lost WalletA man walks into a police station and says, "Excuse me, I've lost my wallet."The police officer asks, "Okay, can you give me a description of your wallet?"The man replies, "Yes, it's black, rectangular, and it has my face on it."【翻译】一个男人走进警察局说：“对不起，我丢失了我的钱包。
简短英语笑话带翻译三篇
【导语】笑话⼀般指短⼩、滑稽的故事,是⼀种民间⼝头创作形式,在民间⽂化中以⼝⼝相传的形式传播。
以下是由整理了简单的中英⽂对照英语笑话，欢迎阅读!【篇⼀】简短英语笑话带翻译 Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths? Gerald: I'd much rather have the half. Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why. Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths. ⽼师：你愿意要半个柑橘，还是⼗分之五个柑橘? 杰拉得：我宁可要半个。
⽼师：仔细想想，说出理由来。
杰拉得：因为你如果把柑橘切成⼗分之五，那柑橘汁就损失太多了。
【篇⼆】简短英语笑话带翻译 One student to another: "How are your English lessons coming along?" "Fine. I used to be one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me." ⼀位学⽣对另⼀位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样?” “很好，我过去不懂英国⼈说话，可现在是英国⼈不懂我的话了。
” 简单的中英⽂对照英语笑话：Get to the hospital 医院要怎么⾛ An absent-minded person was standing in the middle of a busy intersection where a policeman was directing traffic, and he kept bugging the policeman because he was confused. "Excuse me, Officer! Can you tell me how to get to the hospital?" The officer was very busy and said, "Just stand here and you'll get there!" 有个很健忘的⼈站在车⽔马龙的⼗字路⼝正中央，那⾥有个警察正忙着指挥交通，⽽他不断地去⼲扰这位值勤的警员，因为他搞不清楚⽅向。
英语小笑话带翻译
英语小笑话带翻译英语小笑话带翻译25则英语小笑话带翻译（一）：1。
Dad: Tom， please tell me， which month has 28 days?Tom: Every month。
爸爸：告诉我汤姆，哪个月有28天呢？汤姆：每个月都有啊！2。
Boy: Is this seat empty?Girl: Yes， and this one will be if you sit down。
男孩：这个座位是空的么？女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。
3。
Boy: "I'd like to call you。
What's your number?"girl: "It's in the phone book。
" Boy: "But I don't know your name。
" girl: "That's in the phone book too。
"男：我想给你打电话。
你的电话号码是多少？女：在电话本上呢。
男：可是我不明白你的名字呀。
女：也在电话本上呢。
4。
Palmist: The life line in your hand tells that you will die in a year。
Customer: Good gracious! In a year? Palmist: Yes， but I can't say in which。
手相大师：你手上的生命线显示出你还有一年将会死去。
顾客：天哪，一年后？手相大师：是的，可是我不能说是哪一年。
5。
A cop spotted a woman driving and knitting at the same time。
Coming up beside her， he said， "Pull over!" "No，" she replied， "a pair of socks!"巡警发现一名妇女边开车边织毛衣，便开车上前，说："靠边停车(套头衫)！" "不，" 她回答，"是一双袜子！"6。
经典英语笑话6篇
经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。
下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一：我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说：“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。
我妻子是财政部长。
我岳母是作战部长，我女儿是外交秘书。
”“听上去挺有意思的，”他的同事说，“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。
我要做的一切就是付钱。
”英语笑话二：喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭，父亲把服务生叫了过来。
爆笑英语小笑话带翻译
爆笑英语小笑话带翻译爆笑英语小笑话带翻译（精选5篇）笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。
笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。
以下是店铺精心收集了爆笑英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习！爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇1While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(烦躁，发牢骚) andjabbering(快而含糊地说) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.The man's wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."有个人生病了。
他的妻子请了一位医生来给他治病。
医生在给他治疗的'时候，他的妻子一直大惊小怪，神神叨叨地紧张不安。
医生对她说：“你的丈夫必须绝对休息和保持安静。
” 然后他就留下了一些。
她问医生：“什么时候给我丈夫吃这些药呀！”医生回答说：“不用，这些药不是给他吃的，是给你吃的，你需要。
”爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇2She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."有个女人给她的丈夫买了生日礼物。
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
2. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
怎么让纸巾跳舞呢？你往上放点音乐
3. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是生活中的调剂品，能够给人带来欢乐和放松。而英文笑话更是不同国家和地区都能理解的笑话形式，让人们在跨国交流中也能共享欢乐。下面就给大家带来一些经典的英文笑话，并附上中文翻译，一起来欣赏一下吧！
1. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
你怎样称呼不是你的奶酪呢？墨西哥煎玉米饼奶酪。
6. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
我告诉我妻子她应该接受自己的错误，她给了我一个拥抱。
以上是一些笑话不仅仅能给我们带来快乐，还能锻炼我们的英语听力和理解能力。希望大家在学习英语的道路上能够轻松愉快，充满笑声！
听说游乐场有绑架事件吗？他们醒来了。
4. Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
为什么骷髅不打架呢？因为他们没有胆量。
5. What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.
英语搞笑笑话12篇带翻译
英语搞笑笑话12篇带翻译下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话，以供大家学习参考。
英语搞笑笑话：传教士买鹦鹉A preacher is buying a parrotA preacher is buying a parrot.一个传教士在买鹦鹉。
"Are you sure it doesn't scream, yell, or swear?" asked the preacher.“你确信它不会尖叫，大叫或诅咒别人吗?”传教士问。
"Oh absolutely. He's a religious parrot," the storekeeper assures him.“噢，绝对不会。
它是一只虔诚的鹦鹉。
”店主向他保证。
"Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord's prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm."“你看见它腿上的那些细绳了吗?当你拉动右边这根，它会背诵天主经;当你拉动左边那根，它会背诵赞美诗。
”"Wonderful!" says the preacher, "but what happens if you pull both strings?"“太棒了!”传教士说，“但是如果我同时拉动两根绳子，会发生什么呢?”"I fall off my perch, you stupid fool!" screeched the parrot.“我会从树干上掉下去，你这个笨蛋!”鹦鹉尖声说道。
英语搞笑笑话：谁才是有色人种Dear white, something you got to know亲爱的白种人，有几件事你必须知道。
英语笑话6篇带翻译超级搞笑
英语笑话6篇带翻译超级搞笑下面是店铺整理的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一：What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么?What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe圣诞老人喜欢在花园里做什么?答案：锄地。
(英文里Hoe 和ho同音。
hoe是锄草之意，ho则是圣诞老人的笑声。
)英语笑话二：Entering Heaven 进天堂Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates。
三名男子都死于平安夜，而后分别在天堂之门被圣彼得召见。
"In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."圣彼得说：“因为这个神圣的节日，你们每个人都必须有象征圣诞节的物品才能进入天堂”。
The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates," Saint Peter said。
第一名男子从他得口袋里掏出了个打火机，他打燃打火机说：“它代表蜡烛”。
于是圣彼得就让他进入了天堂。
The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You may pass through the pearly gates."第二个男子从口袋里掏出一串钥匙，他把钥匙在手里摇了摇说：“它们是铃铛”圣诞老人也让他上了天堂。
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英文笑话带翻译爆笑
近些年,冷笑话作为一种特殊的幽默方式在互联网、电视节目、书籍杂志上广泛流传。
下面是学习啦小编精心收集的爆笑英文笑话带翻译，希望大家喜欢!
爆笑英文笑话带翻译篇一I n a d a r k e s t n i g h t,a
p o l i c e m a n w a t c h e s a s t a g g e r i n g m a n t r y i n g i n v a i n t o u n l o c k a d o o r. I s t h i s y o u r h o m e? t h e p o l i c e m a n a s k s.
S u r e, I l l p r o v e i t t o y o u i f y o u h e l p m e. I n s i d e, t h e m a n e x p l a i n s, Y o u s e e, t h i s i s m y b e d r o o m. A n d t h i s i s m y w i f e.
A n d w h o i s t h e m a n n e x t t o h e r?t h e p o l i c e m a n w a n t s t o k n o w.
T h a t s m e!
在一个漆黑的夜晚，一名警察看到一个醉醺醺的男人怎么也打不开门。
这是你家吗?警察问。
当然，如果你帮我，我将证明给你看。
走进屋里，那人说：你瞧，这是我的卧室，这是我太太。
那她身边的男人是谁?警察想知道。
那是我啊!
爆笑英文笑话带翻译篇二T h e m a n a g e r o f a s h o p w a s y e l l i n g a t o n e o f h i s s t a f f.
I s a w y o u a r g u i n g w i t h a c u s t o m e r,h e s a i d
c r o s s l y. W i l l y o u p l e a s e r e m e m b e r t h a t i n m y s h o p t h e c u s t o m e r i s a l w a y s r i g h t?D o y o u u n
d
e r s t a n d? Y e s,s i r,s a i d t h e a s s i s t a n t.T h e c u s t o m e r i s a l w a y s r i g h t.
N o w w h a t w e r e y o u a r g u i n g a b o u t?
W e l l s i r,h e s a i d y o u w e r e a n i d i o t.
商店的经理正在训斥一名员工。
我看见你和一个顾客吵架，他非常恼火地说，请你记住，在我的店里，顾客永远是对的。
你懂吗?
是的，先生，店员说，顾客永远是对的。
那你刚才和他吵什么?
噢，先生，他说你是个白痴。
爆笑英文笑话带翻译篇三A f r u i t v e n d o r i n
P h i l i p p i n e s s o l d a w a t e r m e l o n t o a w o m a n a n d
a s s u r e d h e r t h a t i t w a s v e r y s w e e t
b e
c a u s e i t w a s r e
d i n s i d e.
A s s h e r o d e h o m e o n a b i c y c l e,t h e v e h i c l e
s k i d d e d a n d t h e w a t e r m e l o n f e l l t o t h e s t r e e t a n d b r o k e o p e n, t h e w o m a n w a s s u r p r i s e d t o s e e t h a t t h e f r u i t w a s p a l e p i n k b u t n o t r e d.S o s h e r e t u r n e d w i t h i t t o t h e v e n d o r a n d c o m p l a i n e d l o u d l y. M a d a m, r e p l i e d t h e v e n d o r, w h e n o n e f a l l s o u t o f a v e h i c l e t o t h e s t r e e t,o n e c a n e x p e c t t o t u r n p a l e.H o w a b o u t a w a t e r m e l o n?
在菲律宾，一个女人从一个水果商那里买了一个西瓜，水果商向她保证这个西瓜非常甜，因为是红瓤的。
当这个女人骑车回家时，西瓜在刹车时掉在地上摔裂了，女人吃惊地发现这个西瓜不是红瓤的，而是浅粉色的。
于是她返回去找水果商理论。
夫人。
水果商回答，如果一个人从车子上摔倒在地上，也会吓得脸色发白。
更何况是西瓜呢?
看了爆笑英文笑话带翻译的人还看了：
1.英文笑话带翻译爆笑大全
2.经典英语笑话大全爆笑带翻译
3.英语小笑话带翻译爆笑长一点大全
4.关于英文笑话段子带翻译。