英语笑话：Peeing-Eye Dog

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让人泪奔的笑话有哪些英文

让人泪奔的笑话有哪些英文As we all know, jokes are an essential part of our lives. They bring us joy, laughter, and can even make us cry - not from sadness, but from excessive hilarity. In this article, we will explore some tear-inducing jokes that never fail to make people burst into tears of laughter. So brace yourself for a laughter-filled journey through the world of funny English jokes.1. The Talking FrogA man walks into a pub and sits down. He notices a frog sitting next to him, so he leans over and asks, "Hey frog, are you able to talk?"To his surprise, the frog responds, "Yes, I can talk. And not only that, but I'm also a talented musician. In fact, I'm so good that I can play any instrument you can think of."Amazed, the man exclaims, "That's incredible! Could you possibly play the piano for me?"Without hesitation, the frog jumps onto the piano and plays an astounding performance. The bar patrons are left in awe.As the man is about to leave, the bartender asks him, "How did you find a talking, piano-playing frog?"The man replies, "It's a long story. I found a magic lamp with a genie who granted me three wishes. For my first wish, I asked for a bottomless wallet. For my second wish, I asked for a stunningly beautiful wife. And for my third wish, I asked for a talking frog who's a brilliant musician."The bartender is shocked and asks, "But why would you waste your third wish on a talking frog?"The man chuckles and says, "Well, who wouldn't want a talking frog playing the piano?"2. The Injured ChickenA chicken walks into a library, goes up to the librarian, and says, "Bok bok!" The librarian takes a closer look at the chicken and notices that it has its wing bandaged.Concerned, the librarian asks, "Oh no, what happened to your wing?"The chicken replies, "I was crossing the road and got hit by a car. Luckily, I only broke my wing."The librarian, impressed, says, "Well, you're at a library, so why don't you grab a book to read while your wing heals?"The chicken smiles and says, "That's a great idea. Do you have any books on famous chickens?"The librarian nods and leads the chicken to the "Poultry" section. The chicken spends hours engrossed in books about courageous chickens throughout history.After a week, the chicken returns to the library, fully healed and with its wing out of the bandage.The librarian excitedly asks, "How's your wing? Are you feeling better?"The chicken flaps its wings and exclaims, "Oh, I'm feeling fantastic! Thanks to your suggestion, I finally understand why the chicken crossed the road!"3. The Sneezing StatueA man is walking through a museum when he notices a statue of a person sneezing. The sneeze appears so lifelike that it fascinates him.Curious, the man approaches the security guard and asks, "Excuse me, sir. I couldn't help but notice this amazing statue. How is it possible to capture a sneeze in such detail?"The security guard chuckles and replies, "Well, it's not a statue. That's a real person!"Astounded, the man asks, "Are you serious? How is that even possible?"The security guard smiles and explains, "You see, our museum wanted to showcase human emotions in the purest form. So, we hire people to recreate various emotions, including sneezing. That person is paid to sneeze on demand."Still amazed, the man asks, "Well, that's certainly an interesting job. How did you even find someone willing to do that?"The security guard grins and replies, "Oh, it wasn't too difficult. We posted a job advertisement that said, 'Looking for someone who can make a tissue dance.'"4. The Unbeatable HorseA man walks into a bar and spots an old cowboy sitting at the counter. The cowboy has a hat pulled down low, covering most of his face.Curiosity gets the better of the man, so he approaches the cowboy and asks, "Excuse me, sir. I can't help but notice your hat. What's the story behind it?"The cowboy lifts his hat slightly and reveals that he has a horseshoe nailed to his forehead. He smirks and says, "You see this horseshoe? It gives me superpowers. It makes me invincible."Intrigued, the man replies, "That's incredible! How did you discover that the horseshoe gives you superpowers?"The cowboy chuckles and says, "Well, it's quite simple. I was once bitten by a poisonous snake, but I didn't get affected. I got hit by lightning, but I didn't feel a thing. This horseshoe gives me extraordinary abilities."The man, astonished, asks, "But doesn't wearing a horseshoe on your forehead cause any discomfort?"The cowboy shrugs and says, "Sure, it's a little uncomfortable, but nothing a hat can't fix!"5. The Magic MirrorA woman buys a new magic mirror, which promises to make her look ten years younger every time she speaks the truth into it.Excited, she rushes home and stands in front of the mirror, saying, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, make me look ten years younger!"To her amazement, she watches as her wrinkles disappear, and her skin becomes smoother and more youthful.Overwhelmed with joy, the woman continues talking, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, I think my husband is the most handsome man of all!"In an instant, the woman sees herself transform into a young, beautiful, and radiant version of herself.Unable to contain her excitement, she rushes to her husband and exclaims, "Honey, you won't believe what happened! I found this incredible magic mirror, and every time I speak the truth into it, it makes me look ten years younger!"Her husband looks at her in disbelief and replies, "Well, maybe you should try saying that I have a big bank account."These jokes never fail to bring tears of laughter to people's eyes. Whether it's a talking frog, an injured chicken, a sneezing statue, an unbeatable cowboy, or a magic mirror, these English jokes showcase the power of humor and its universal ability to make us cry with laughter. Laughter truly is the best medicine, and these jokes prove it to be true in any language.。

英语笑话会说话狗两篇

Dog for SaleA man walked into a pet shop one day with a large and very ugly dog.It had long hair, short legs, no tail and a very wet nose."Good morning, sir." the owner of the pet shop said. "How can I help you?""I want to sell the dog."The pet shop owner looked at the dog and shook his head."I'm sorry. I can't give you anything for that animal. No one will want to buy him.""Why not?" asked the man. "He's clean, well-behaved and healthy.""Look at him, sir." said the pet shop owner. "He hasn't got a tail, his legs are too short and his hair's too long. Who would want to buy such a dog?""Well, I guess you're right." the man said. "But he can talk.""What do you mean he can talk?" the pet shop owner asked."Yes, he can speak perfect English. Just listen." the man answered.The dog then spoke."It's true, sir." he said. "I am the world's greatest talking dog. I've been to America and talked to the President at the White House in Washington. I've talked to the Queen of England and the Emperor of Japan. Please buy me, sir. This man is very cruel to me. He makes me work too hard and doesn't feed me very well. He never takes me for a walk or gives me a bath. Sometimes he leaves me alone for weeks. I'm so unhappy, sir. Please buy me and find a good home for me."The pet shop owner could hardly believe what he was hearing."That's amazing." he said. "You're right. He is a talking dog. But tell me, why do you want to sell him?""Because I'm tired of all his lies." the man said.Breaking the NewsA very old lady won a million dollars in a lottery（彩票）. Her son and his wife heard the news on the radio."How are we going to tell your mother?" the wife asked. "The shock might kill her!""That's true." the son said. "Perhaps we'd better speak to her doctor about it. He'll know how to break the news to her gently."They explained the situation to the old lady's doctor."I'm glad you told me." he said. "A shock, even a happy one, could give her a heart attack. Leave it to me. I'll find a way of breaking the news to her."He thought about the problem for several days, and then decided what he would say.He called on the old lady and sat by her bedside. He took her hand in his."Let's play a game, my dear." he said. "A 'Let's Pretend' game.""Oh, yes." the old lady said. "I love 'Let's Pretend' games.""Good. I'll ask you a question first." the doctor said. "Then you can ask me one."He pretended to think for a few moments. Then he said, "Tell me, what would you do if you won a million dollars in the lottery?""Oh, that's an easy one." the old lady said. "I'd give most of it to you, doctor, because you have been so good to me all these years. Doctor!"But the doctor was now lying on the floor. He had died of shock.。

又幽默又短的英语笑话

又幽默又短的英语笑话对于笑话，可能只是文字游戏，但有时它在人们解决生活中的困惑时起着重要作用，知道英语笑话有哪些吗?下面是小编给大家带来的又幽默又短的英语笑话_有趣的笑话英语小短文，以供大家参考，我们一起来看看吧!又幽默又短的英语笑话(一)一切都正常A young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned." "You talked! You talked!" Shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taked this long?" "Well, up till now," Said the boy, "things have been okay."又幽默又短的英语笑话(二)老谋深算There was a 75-year-old multi-millionaire who had just married a beautiful 18-year-old blond girl. So his friends asked him, "How did you manage to get an 18-year-old girl to marry you, when you're 75?"And the old man replied, "I told her I was 99, so she would marry me quick!"又幽默又短的英语笑话(三)吝啬鬼的聚会The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot.""Why use my elbow and foot?""Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"又幽默又短的英语笑话(四)导盲犬帮我看A blind man with a seeing eye dog at his side walks into a grocery store.The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager, who has seen all this, thinks this is quite strange. So, he decides to find out what's going on. The store manager approaches the blind man swinging the dog and says, "Pardon me. May I help you with something." The blind man says, "No thanks. I'm just looking around."又幽默又短的英语笑话(五)林肯过生日Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812?Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.又幽默又短的英语笑话(六)三只乌龟Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee。

英语经典爆笑笑话10则

英语经典爆笑笑话10则下面是店铺整理的英语经典爆笑笑话，欢迎大家阅读!英语经典爆笑笑话：小心有狗!As a stranger entered a little country store, he noticed a sign warning, "Danger! Beware of dog!" posted on the glass door. Inside, he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. "Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?" he asked the owner. "Yep, that's him," came the reply. The stranger couldn't help but be amused. "That certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?" "Because," the owner explained, "Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him!"一名陌生人走进一家乡间小商店，看到玻璃门上帖着的一个告示牌上写着，“危险! 小心有狗!” 进去后，他看到一条样子一点都不凶的老狗趴在收款机旁边的地板上睡觉。

“这就是大伙都得留神的那只狗啊?” 陌生人问店主。

“是，就是他”，店主回答。

听到这个回答，陌生人觉得很好笑。

“我觉得那条狗一点都不可怕。

小学生简单英语笑话带翻译

小学生简单英语笑话带翻译品析一只聪明的狗 A Clever DogA dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. His friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - The dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper."How much did you give him?" asked the owner."Five dollars."Well, that explains it. When you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie."一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱，它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来。

他的朋友坚持要来个演示，并给了狗一些钱。

狗一溜小跑着去了。

但一个小时过去了，仍不见它带报纸回来。

“你给了它多少钱?”狗的主人问。

“五元。

”“这就是了。

你给它五元钱时，它就去看电影。

”经典小学生简单英语笑话带翻译我晚饭后从不工作 I Never Work After SupperA penny-pinching farmer didn't want his hired hand to stop working. One morning, he told thefarmhand, "It's such a nuisance to come in from the field,, wash up for lunch and take time toeat. Why don't we save time and eat lunch now?"The hired man agreed. The farm's wife brought in some cold meat and fried potatoes, andthe two men ate again.When they had finished, the cheap farmer said, "While we'restill at the table, let's havesupper too. " They were now served steak, boiled potatoes and mixed vegetables, and they ateonce more."Now that the meals are out of the way, " the farmer announced, we can go out and workall day without interruption. ""Oh, no, " the farmhand answered. " I never work after supper.一位农场主非常吝啬，不想让他雇佣的帮手停下来休息。

让人笑道喷血的英语笑话

让人笑道喷血的英语笑话●Our son, at age of five, had a fascination for motorcycles. The sight of one would always bring forth squeals(长声尖叫) of delight, aompanied by excited remarks of Look at that! Look at that! I'm going to have one of those someday, his dad's response always was Not as long as I'm alive.One day, while our son was talking to a little friend, a motorcycle passed by. He excitedly pointed it out to the boy and exclaimed, Look at that! Look at that! I'm getting one of those as soon as my dad dies.我五岁的儿子对摩托车有强烈的爱好。

只要看见一辆摩托车，他就会快乐得哇哇直叫，并冲动地说：瞧这辆!瞧这辆，我总有一天也要有一辆。

他爸爸的答复老是只要我活着，你就别想有这玩艺儿。

一天我们的儿子跟他的小朋友在说话，有一辆摩托车开了过去。

他兴奋的指着摩托车叫道瞧这辆!瞧这辆!等我爸一死我就要有这样一辆摩托车了。

Q: Why was six scared of seven?A: Because seven "ate" nine.问题：为什么六怕七呢?答复：因为七连九都能吃掉呢!本应该是seven eight nine, 但是利用了发音相同，将eight 用ate(吃)替换掉了，你看懂了么?A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."一名老师让学生们利用单词“beans(豆子)”造句，其中一个女孩说“我爸爸种豆子”。

英语幽默小故事：导盲犬

英语幽默小故事：导盲犬A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink.一个人带着他的狗去了酒吧，他径直走向吧台，要了一杯酒。

The bartender says You cant bring that dog in here! The guy, without missing a beat, says This is my seeing-eye dog.招待说："你不能带狗进来！'这个人毫不犹豫地说，"这是我的导盲犬'Oh man, the bartender says, Im sorry, here, the first ones on me. The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door."天呐，'招待说，"抱歉了，第一杯算我的。

'这个人喝了他的酒，去门边的桌子那坐下了。

Another guy walks into the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says You cant bring that dog in here unless you tell him its a seeing-eye dog.另外一个人带着一只吉娃娃走进酒吧。

第一个人看见了他，把他拦下，说"你不能把狗带进来，除非你跟他们说这是一只导盲犬。

' The second man graciously thanks the first man and continuesto the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says Hey, you cant bring that dog in here!第二个人谢过了第一个人，走向吧台。

英语小笑话短一点精选

英语小笑话短一点精选喂狗 For the DogFor the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"喂狗一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭，父亲把服务生叫了过来。

”先生，什么事?“服务生问。

”我儿子的盘子里剩下许多肉，“父亲说，”能给我们一个袋子吗?我把剩下的东西带回去喂狗。

“”啊呀，爸爸!“儿子激动地叫喊着。

”咱家养狗了吗?“我要做的一切就是付钱 !All I do is payAll I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "My wife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."我要做的一切就是付钱布朗先生告诉同事说：“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。

充满童真的英语笑话

充满童真的英语笑话1. Mother:"I sent my little boy for two pounds of plums and you gave him a pound and a half."母亲：“我派自己的小孩买两磅李子，你却给了他一磅半。

”Shopkeeper:"My scales are all right, madam. Have you weighed your little boy?"店主：“我的秤没问题，太太。

你称过儿子了吗?”2. "Mama, why does the puppy drink the water in the slot?"“妈妈，小狗为什么要喝水沟里的水?”"Because it's thirsty."“因为它渴了。

”"Oh, I know that the puppy has no money to buy coke!"“噢，我知道了，是小狗没有钱买可乐!”3. Two little boys were looking at an abstract painting in an art shop.两个小男孩正在一家美术店看一幅抽象画。

"Let's run," said one, "or they say we did it."“咱们快跑吧，”其中一个男孩说道，“不然他们会说是我们干的。

”4. Little Mike was visiting on his grandparents' farm. Checking the chicken's tail, he came upon a peacock. He ranquickly to the house shouting, "Granny, e quick! Your chicken is in bloom!"小迈克正在参观爷爷奶奶的农场。

英语小笑话——精选推荐

英语⼩笑话英语⼩笑话20字 1、⼀游客说：“为⽑韩国国花(⽊槿)那么难看?” 另⼀个说：“因为还没整容呗。

” 2、我：为什么韩国⼈恨中国⼈，⽽中国⼈却⼜喜欢韩国⼈? 朋友：就好⽐⼉⼦不懂事怨恨他爹，但是他爹却还是⼀如既往的爱着他。

3、⼀对鸳鸯看到个韩国⼈，吓哭了。

为什么? 因为棒打鸳鸯 4、我算是明⽩为什么韩国⽇本写不出西游记了，吴承恩是南⽅⼈，笔下的妖怪吃唐僧⾁都习惯⽤蒸，费时费料，还没上锅就给救了。

假如是韩国妖怪，⼀抓到唐僧就塞泡菜坛⼦⾥腌上了，还说啥九九⼋⼗⼀难。

5、⼥孩喜欢男孩，每晚都和男孩聊天。

可男孩要么半天回⼀句，要么⼲脆不理。

⼥孩依旧主动着。

终于在某⼀天，男孩突然回得很快，⾼谈阔论。

⼥孩感动，努⼒终于没⽩费，⿎起勇⽓问：“你终于对我有感觉了吗?” 男孩淡淡地说：“不是呀，今天刚刚把三星⼿机换掉了。

” 6、碰到⽤三星⼿机的男⽣就嫁了吧，毕竟这么卡的⼿机都能忍，那你的⽆理取闹⼜算得了什么? 7、⼀⼩偷蹲路边偷车撬锁，忙得不亦乐乎时哥出现了。

问：好开不?贼：不⾏钥匙断⾥⾯了，我：要帮忙不?，贼：谢谢不⽤了，继续观看良久，断匙弄出来了捣⿎半天仍未开，我遂凑上去递他⼀把钥匙，试试这个。

⼀插⼀扭开了，此贼那是⼀个劲的'谢啊，推着车还准备⾛呢，他仙⼈掌的还没意识到我是车主! 8、前⼏天撞车把嘴巴撞裂了，到医院缝了五针!虽打了⿇药但还觉得疼的烧⼼!缝好後刚出⼿术室，⼀股冷风袭来，说时迟，那时快。

突然菊花⼀紧，控制不住了!⼀个“哈湫”～硬⽣⽣把刚缝好的线给扯断了…!医⽣：……。

家⼈：……。

朋友：……。

我：啊啊啊啊啊啊…! 9、早上⽼公赖床，⽤被⼦把⾃⼰裹了好⼏层。

我⼀⽓就⽤⽪带拦腰给他绑被⼦⾥，然后去上班了。

下午回来，看见⽼公保持着早上的造型，眼神幽怨的看着我。

他说：“饿了⼀天不是关键，没空调热死了不是关键，明天怎么去单位解释没上班⽽且不接电话也不是关键，关键是：尿没有憋住…【英语⼩笑话20字】相关⽂章：08-2908-0208-0206-2306-2112-2712-10 09-24 09-19 08-27。

英语幽默的有趣小笑话

英语幽默的有趣小笑话在开心轻松的氛围中学习知识。

今天小编就给大家分享一下英语的笑话，大家可以阅读一下笑起来两只鸟Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。

谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

Teacher: Please tell us.老师：请说说看。

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。

我的狗不识字Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!布朗夫人：哦，亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。

”Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!布朗夫人：哦，亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。

有关狗的英语笑话带翻译

有关狗的英语笑话带翻译从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。

下面店铺为大家带来有关狗的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎大家阅读!有关狗的英语笑话带翻译1A woman walks into a pet shop and sees a cute little dog.She asks the shopkeeper,“Does your dog bite?”The shopkeeper says,“No,my dog does not bit.”The woman tries to pet the dog and the dog bites her.“Ouch!” She says,“I thought you said your dog does not bite!”The shopkeeper replies,“That is not my dog!”一个妇人走进一家宠物店,看见一只很可爱的小狗.她问店主：“你的狗咬人吗?”店主说：“不,我的狗不咬人.”于是这个妇人试着抚摸小狗,可是小狗却咬了她.“哎哟!”妇人说,“我想你刚才还说你的狗不咬人.”店主人回答说：“那不是我的狗.”有关狗的英语笑话带翻译2A dog owner claimed that his pet,when given money,would go to the news stall to buy a paper.His friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - The dog trotted off,but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper."How much did you give him?" asked the owner."Five dollars."Well,that explains it.When you give him five dollars,he goes to a movie."一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱,它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来.他的朋友坚持要来个演示,并给了狗一些钱.狗一溜小跑着去了.但一个小时过去了,仍不见它带报纸回来.“你给了它多少钱?”狗的主人问.“五元.”“这就是了.你给它五元钱时,它就去看电影.”有关狗的英语笑话带翻译3The family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭，父亲把服务生叫了过来。

[简单英语笑话最短的精选]10条最短的英语笑话

[简单英语笑话最短的精选]10条最短的英语笑话简单英语笑话最短的精选简单英语笑话最短的精选最短的简单英语笑话精选胡萝卜(中英) Patient: You say carrot sight. Is that true 患者:“你说过吃胡萝卜对视力有帮助，是真的吗” Doctor: Certainly. Have you ever seen rabbits wearing glasses 医生:“当然，你见过戴眼镜的兔子吗” 最短的简单英语笑话阅读牛奶新鲜吗(中英) Customer: I wonder if this milk is fresh. 顾客:“我怀疑这里的牛奶是否新鲜。

” Waiter: Fresh Three hours ago it was GRASS! 侍者:“新鲜三个小时前它还是一堆草呢!” 最短的简单英语笑话学习玩具娃娃(中英) Bobby: Billy broke my new doll! 鲍伯:“比利弄坏了我的玩具娃娃。

” Mum: How did he do that 妈妈:“他怎么弄坏的” Bobby: I hit him over the head with it. 鲍伯:“在我用玩具娃娃打他头的时候。

”最短的简单英语笑话欣赏火车与汽车(中英) Teacher: Why does a train run faster than a car 老师:“为什么火车比汽车快” Pupil:Because it has more wheels than a car. 学生:“因为火车的轮子比汽车多。

” 最短的简单英语笑话品味刮脸(中英) Harry: My big brother shaves every day. 哈里:“我哥哥每天都刮脸。

” Henry: My brother shaves fifty times a day. 亨利:“那有什么，我哥哥每天刮SO 次脸。

” Harry: Is he crazy 哈里:“他疯了吗” Henry: No , he“ s a barber. 亨利:“没有，他是一个理发师。

小学英语作文：SeeingEyeDog一只导盲狗_小学英语作文_

小学英语作文：Seeing Eye Dog一只导盲狗A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one day. They come to a busy intersection, and the dog, ignoring the high volume of traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right out into the thick of traffic. This is followed by the screech of tires and horns blaring as panicked drivers try desperately not to run the pair down.The blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on the other side of the street, and the blind man pulls a cookie out of his coat pocket, which he offers to the dog.A passerby, having observed the near fatal incident, can't control his amazement and says to the blind man, "Why on earth are you rewarding your dog with a cookie? He nearly got you killed!"The blind man turns partially in his direction and replies, "To find out where his head is, so I can kick his ass."译文：阿瞎子是走在街上与他的导盲犬一天。

关于带翻译的英语笑话

关于带翻译的英语笑话Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.我的狗不识字布朗夫人：哦，亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。

”A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never moveto a retirement community. Everybody else is n their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted orloaded, they yell,"Get the kid."忠告“年轻者”这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。

如果你只有65岁的话，千万别进退休社区。

因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。

每当要搬东西，抬东西或者装东西时，他们就叫喊，“让小的干吧。

”Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。

One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。

Teacher: who just threw that?!老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩：我!我现在要回家了。

When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss hisstop, he nudged him and said: "Wakeup, sir!"当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。