那段最痛苦的生活经历教给了你什么

What did you learn from your most painful life experience?

你从痛苦的生活经历中学会了什么？

Here，10 lessons:

这里有10条经验谈：

来自Milena Rangelov的答案:

I am so much stronger than I think I am. So much! No matter how bad I feel today, I know that I have some more strength to wake up tomorrow and make new baby steps. And so do you.

我比想象中坚强太多。不论今天有多么糟糕，我始终坚信明天醒来后我会更具力量，也会慢慢进步。你也一样。

I might work and try, but some things will always be beyond my control.

我可能会去工作，去尝试，但还是有许多东西我无法控制。

The same level of thinking that brought me into this situation, won't help me get out of it. I must think in different ways and try different things.

No one is coming. I am alone and no one is going to figure things out for me. I have to take full responsibility for myself and my life.I am the victim only if I choose to be one.

思维定式把我带入困境，丝毫不会助我脱离苦海。我必须换种思路，尝试不同的事物。不会有人来帮忙，我始终孤独一人，没有人会帮我解决问题。我会对自己和自己的人生负全责。会不会成为受害者就看自己的选择了。

My success in life will be determined by how well I am able to survive painful times, bounce back and start again, stronger and smarter. Not by how well am I able to avoid troubles and mistakes.

如何在困境中生存，恢复活力，重新开始决定着我的成就，而不是由如何躲避困难和避免错误所决定的，在这之后，我会变得更强更聪明哦。

Painful experiences are in fact wake-up calls and revelations . But only if you interpret them in that way."Why has this happened to me?" is a stupid question, that sustains victim mentality. "Why has this happened for me?" is way more powerful and creative question.

事实上，痛苦的经历往往会给我们启示，但是需要你自己用一种方式解读。“我怎么会摊上这些事儿？”这么问问题很愚蠢，完全是一副受害者心理。“为什么这些事儿会因我而起？”却是一个更有力量和新意的问法。

Sharing your pain and suffering with others is extremely humble and vulnerable experience, but leads to the most profound and intimate connecting! I thought that people will love me only if I am impeccable and cool. In fact, people can identify your fears, failures and imperfections so easy.

与他人分享你的痛苦和遭遇极其卑微和脆弱，但是这个举动可以促进你们之间最亲密的关系。我认为，也许只有我出色到无可挑剔时才会有人来爱我。而事实上，人们可以很容易看出你的恐惧，失败和不完美。

Destruction is the essential part of the creation, you cannot get anything new before something old is gone.

破坏是创造的重要组成部分,旧的不去新的不来。

Thanks for the great Q. I hope my pain will serve as a teacher for me, as well as for you.

感谢楼主提出这么好的问题。希望我遭受的痛苦能够成为我的老师，同样希望你也是哦！

来自Dushka Zapata的答案

First, let me quickly assess what I go through when I go through something incredibly painful:

首先，我来快速回忆回忆历经苦痛时是如何备受煎熬的：

Inability to sleep 无法入睡

Loss of appetite 没食欲

Anxiety 焦虑

Obsessive behavior (such as attempting to plan ahead to anticipate worst-case scenarios)、强迫观念行为（比如由于可能会出现的最糟糕状况而试图提前计划）

Worry 担忧

Struggle 挣扎

Here is what I've learned: 这是我从苦痛中学来的：

In my case (Not yours. Mine.) a lot of what makes a painful experience is self-inflicted.

我只说自己的情况（不是你的哦）。许多痛苦的经历都是我自己造成的。

As such, here is what I remind myself to do better what life throws at me:

就本身而言，做这些事情有助于提醒我如何应对生活中的不幸。

CALM DOWN 镇定下来

Get some sleep. In order to remain clear headed and functional you need to sleep.

睡觉。为了保持大脑清醒以及其正常运转，你需要睡觉。

Eat. I know you don't want to. Eat anyway.

吃。我知道你其实并不想。无论如何吃点东西吧。

Anxiety and worry accomplish nothing.

忧虑和担心是无济于事的。