爆笑“中式英语”集合-每日英语
网络流行的经典中式英语
网络流行的经典中式英语★、know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…★、WATCH SISTER表妹★、dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’’son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！★、I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸★、one car comeone car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述★、heart flower angry open心花怒放★、go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过★、小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!★、we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿★、how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？★、you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！ together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！★、as far as you go to die有多远，死多远★、hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝★、you me you me彼此彼此★、You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！★、If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I haveone!要钱没有，要命一条★、I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。
中式英语对话闹出的笑话
中式英语对话闹出的笑话1. 你是来旅游江苏的吗？
- Yes,我是来旅游的江苏。
2. 你会泡茶吗？
- Yes,我会泡茶，但是我不会喝茶。
3. 今天天气真好，你想去哪里玩？
- Yes,我想去公园散步踢毽子。
4. 你读过小说《水浒传》吗？
- Yes，我读过，那是一部很经典的中西合璧的小说。
5. 你觉得这个菜好吃吗？
- Yes，这个菜真是好吃，味道很有少数民族的特色。
6. 你是想吃中餐还是西餐？
- Yes，我是想吃中餐，因为我很喜欢唐诗宋词。
7. 你觉得中国的汉字难学吗？
- Yes，我觉得汉字确实很难学，但是学会了很有成就感。
8. 你可以用中文介绍一下你自己吗？
- Yes，我叫张三，今年25岁，我是从美国来的留学生。
9. 你们那儿有什么好吃的美食吗？
- Yes，我们那儿有很多好吃的东西，比如说肉夹馍和炒饭。
10. 你对中国有什么印象？
- Yes，我觉得中国非常有文化底蕴，比如说昆曲和京剧。
中式英语闹出的那些笑话
'B.I.T.C.H......bitch,correct?'
那男的终于还是没能忍住怒火，近似于怒吼似的对我喊道：
'NOB.E.A.C.H.....BEACH'
接下来的一年里，没再跟这间公司有过任何生意往来……
这个笑话你看懂了吗？
场景五：
小强去看电影，到了电影售票处，发现一个老外和售票小姐连说带比得好半天，就自告奋勇的上前做翻译，售票小姐说：麻烦你告诉她，现在坐票售完了只剩下站票，如果要看要站着看。
他身边的朋友着急了，告诉他，人家问你牛排要几分熟，他恍然大悟，想了想说：“Eighty percent(百分之八十熟).”
服务员又一愣说：“Sorry，we don’t have that.”
问题来了，那么牛肉的5分熟、7分熟、全熟怎么说？
场景三：
小明上英文课时跟老师说：May I go to the toilet?
文中的“sex”是什么意思？
chinglish一直是困扰中国学生口语的一大问题很多学生在接受中国教育之后就是会脱口而出中式英语而不能给句子合理的安排有时候中式英语还会闹出笑话来
中式英语闹出的那些笑话
Chinglish一直是困扰中国学生口语的一大问题，很多学生在接受中国教育之后就是会脱口而出中式英语而不能给句子合理的安排，有时候中式英语还会闹出笑话来。下面我们来看看：
小强转头就对老外说：no sit see, stand see. if see stand see.
老外回答说：sorry I don’t understand your English.
小强就对售票小姐说：哦，他说他不懂英文.......
关于中国式搞笑英语笑话
20XX年关于中国式搞笑英语笑话在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。
本文是关于中国式搞笑英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇一we two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁阿how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你?you don’t bird me,I don’t bird you你不鸟我，我也不鸟你you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ! together up !你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上!hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝you me you me彼此彼此1/ 5You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住!know is know noknow is noknowheart flower angry open心花怒放go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条I call Li old big. toyear 25.笑死人不偿命的中国式英语笑话笑话大全我叫李老大，今年25。
you have two down son。
你有两下子。
as far as you go to die2/ 5有多远，死多远!!!!I give you face you don’’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇二有次房东问我:“Did you eat anything yet?”我说：“no.”她听后重复了一遍：“So you didn’t eat anything.”我答道：“Yes...?”房东老太太犹豫了一下，又问：“Did you eat?”我又答道：“No.”她接着说：“So you didn’t eat……?”我说：“Yes...?”估计房东太太当时都快要崩溃了……关于中国式搞笑英语笑话篇三go and look!走着瞧good good study,day day up好好学习天天向上No Mao ze dong ,no new china没有毛没有新中国go a head! 去个头!People mountain peole sea!人山人海3/ 5give you some color see see!!给你点颜色看看no three no four 不三不四no money no women no good(哈，这是谁说的)we two who and who?我们俩谁跟谁dog day“"""s狗日的poor light egg穷光蛋if you tiger me ,i will mountain you如果你唬我我就煽你you don""""t bird me,I don""""t bird you你不鸟我我也不鸟你full clear ten big cool punishment满清十大酷刑love his mother who who who爱他妈谁谁谁KILL ONE POLICE *****杀一警百i s h i t love you我便爱上了你banana fish相交于f u c k do system操作系统horse horse tiger tiger马马虎虎fish yes于是your grandma""""s legs你奶奶个腿King eight egg***5 talks, 4 beauties 3 loves五讲四美三热爱4/ 5give me take down!给我拿下WATCH SISTER 表妹your grandma""""s bear你奶奶个熊yellow fly red黄飞鸿red face know to me红颜知己American Chinese not enough美中不足pig wood wolf house bee!珠慕朗玛峰You really have two down sons你真有两下子round son egg原子弹chicken gun ice机枪兵water sex poplar flower水性杨花How are you? 怎么是你?How old are you? 怎么老是你?5/ 5。
有趣的中式英语大全
中式英语汇编1．no three no four 不三不四2．how are you ? how old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you don''t bird me,I don''t bird you 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你4．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me 彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!! 你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow 知之为知之，不知为不知...9．Watch sister 表妹10.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse''s son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11．American Chinese not enough 美中不足12．one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open 心花怒放14．go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16．If you want money, I have no; if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25. 我叫李老大，今年25。
十大爆笑中式英语
进入寝室的网线插在路由器的WAN口上，在从路由器的LAN口接出两根网线，分别插在两台电脑上
打开一台电脑，打开IE浏览器，在地址栏输入192.168.1.1回车（有的路由器是192.168.0.1，在路由器背面一般都标注，自己看一下），在打开的页面中找有DHCP字样的选项，进入后启动里面的DHCP服务，再把两台电脑的TCP/IP属性中的几个选项都设为“自动获取”（方法：右键点击“网上邻居”，选“属性”，右键点击“本地连接”属性，“此连接使用下列项目”框中找“internet协议（TCP/IP）”双击，最后“确定”关闭）
① 修理 ② mend ③ fix/repair
① 入口 ② way in ③ entrance
① 出口 ② way out ③ exit(way out在口语中是crazy的意思)
① 勤奋 ② diligent ③ hardworking/studious/conscientious
① 好吃 ② delicious ③ good/nice/tasty/appetizing(delicious在中国被滥用)
① 尽我最大努力 ② try my best ③ try/strive(try的本意就是try my best)
① 有名 ② famous ③ well-known/renowned/legendary/popular(famous在中国被滥用)
if you want life, i have one
① 欢迎你到... ② welcome you to ... ③ welcome to...
① 永远记住你 ② remember you forever ③ always remember you(没有人能活到forever)
经典搞笑中国式英语1-50
最经典搞笑中国式英语100句01. 有他这颗扫帚星，什么事情都办不成。
[误] With a comet like him, nothing can be accomplished。
[正] With a jinx like him, nothing can be accomplished。
注：“扫帚星”是中国人对“慧星”(comet)的俗称，因其后面象拖着的一条像扫帚一样的长尾巴而得名。
在中国古代，“扫帚星”被认为是灾难的预兆，并被用来比喻不吉利的人或事；祸根：(person or thing that is thought to bring)bad luck(to sb/sth)；curse。
英语的 comet 虽然没有这层含义，但却有一个对应的说法，即 jinx。
例：There's a jinx on/Someone's put a jinx on this car: it's always giving me trouble. “这辆汽车上有什么妨人的东西，总给我找麻烦”。
02.萝卜青菜，各有所爱。
[误] Some prefer radish but others prefer cabbage。
[正] Tastes differ。
注：Tastes differ/vary 是句英语谚语，除此以外，原句还可翻译成 No dish suits all tastes 或 You can never make everyone happy 等。
《新概念英语》第三册第23课的标题是：One man's meat is another man's poison，表达的很生动。
总之，应采取意译。
03.他一向嘴硬，从不认错。
[误] He has always got a hard mouth and never admit a fault。
[正] He never says uncle。
网络流行的经典中式英语
网络流行的经典中式英语1．we two who and who？咱俩谁跟谁阿2．how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你，怎么老是你？3．you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！4．as far as you go to die有多远，死多远！！！！5．hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!!有事起奏，无事退朝6．you me you me彼此彼此7．You Give Me Stop!!你给我站住！8．know is know noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…9．WATCH SISTER表妹10．dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse’’son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！11.．I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸12．one car comeone car go ,two car pengpeng,people die 车祸现场描述13．heart flower angry open心花怒放14．go past no mistake past走过路过，不要错过15．小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!16．If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I haveone!要钱没有，要命一条17．I call Li old big. toyear 25.我叫李老大，今年25。
中式英语大全
[搞笑] 中式英语大全[size=2]1. 爱他妈的谁谁谁：love he mother’s who who who2. 白痴：White eat!3. 板门弄斧：play an ax before Luban4. 班长：class long5. 彼此彼此：you me you me6. 表妹：watch sister7. 别唬我：don’t tiger me8. 不管三七二十一：no care three seven two ten one9. 不入虎穴，焉得虎子：Blue who say，and whose10. 不三不四：no three no four11. 不要开黄腔：do not open yellow gun12. 车祸现场描述：one car come，one car go ,two car peng－peng, people die13. 呈现强烈的企图心：Demonstrate the strong attempt heart14. 吃白食：eat white food15. 春江水暖鸭先知：spring river water warm duck first know16. 大人不计小人过：Big people do not think of small people’s mistake17. 第一眼看到你，我就爱上你了：first eye see you, i shit love you18. 电源线：power line19. 放马过来，给你点颜色看看：release your horse and come, I’ll give you some color to see see20. 蜂拥而至：go out like bee21. 给你点颜色看看：I’ll show you some color22. 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸：I give you face you don’t wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face23. 恭喜发财：go high try24. 狗娘养的：dog mother born25. 关公面前耍大刀：play a big knife before Guangong26. 好多人死了，你怎么不去死！：How many pople go to die, why do not you go to die27. 好好学习、天天向上：good good study, day day up28. 好久不见：long time no see （这个用法已经被当地的美国口语，尤其是被文化程度不高的群体所接受）29. 红颜知己：red face know me30. 加油：add oil31. 救人一命，胜造七级浮屠：save man one life, betther than building up 7-floor tower32. 开水：open water33. 看不看：see no see?34. 抗日游行：resist sun swim go35. 课间操：lesson between36. 老表：old watch37. 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞：dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse’s son can make hole38. 马马虎虎：horse horse tiger tiger39. 没脸见人：have no face see person40. 美中不足：American Chinese not enough41. 面试：face try42. 明天谁起得早谁叫谁：tomorrow morning who get up early, who call who!43. 哪凉快哪呆着去where cool where you stay!44. 你爱我吗：you love I?45. 你不鸟我，我也不鸟你：you don’t bird me, so I don’t bird you46. 你给我等着：you give me wait47. 你给我滚出去：you gave me get out48. 你给我记住：you give me remember49. 你给我站住：you give me stop50. 你没看，我现在非常忙，一边玩去：You no see, I now very busy. One side play go51. 你妻子真漂亮/哪里哪里：your wife is beautiful/where where52. 你去不去？你不去我去！：You go no go? You no go I go!53. 你认为你是谁？：What do you think ,who are you ?54. 你他妈的：you he mother’s55. 你问我，我去问谁：you ask me, me ask who56. 你丫要敢唬我，我他妈扇你！：IF you tiger me,I will mountain you!57. 你有两下子：you have two down son58. 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上：you have seed，I will give you some color to see see, brothers ！together up ！59. 你真有两下子：you really have tow down son60. 骑驴看唱本，走着瞧：riding a donkey reading play , go and see61. 七上八下：seven up eight down62. 亲爱的王小姐：dear wang little girl63. 請別碰行李：Please no touch the move the lee64. 青翠欲滴：It`s so green as will dropped65. 去你妈：go you mother66. 让世界充满爱：let's make love all over the world67. 人山人海：people mountain people sea68. 人之初，性本善：people first born, sex is kind69. 三人行，必有我师：three people go, one is my teacher70. 三心二意：three heart two meaning71. 色狼：colour wolf72. 生日快乐：birthday happy73. 上网：up net74. 上学：up school75. 胜败乃家常便饭：win lost milk house long poopoo rice76. 是不是：yes no yes77. 十全十美：ten all ten nice78. 十三点：ten three point79. 试试看：try try see80. 耍帅：play handsome81. 死猪不怕开水烫！：die pig not pa hot water tang!82. 谈朋友：talk friend83. 体壮如牛：body strong as a cow84. 万紫千红：ten thousand purple one thousand red （我在中国的某一个挂历中看到）85. 王八：king eight86. 王八蛋：wang eight eggs87. 望穿秋水：look through autumn water88. 王老五：wang old five89. 唯小人与女人难养也：only small people and women hard to feed90. 我的天呀！：my sky !91. 我服了你！：I follow you!92. 我感到很难过：I feel difficult to pass93. 我叫李老大，今年25：I call Li old big. toyear 2594. 我容易么我？：am I easy I？95. 我是大儿子：I am a big son96. 我是独一无二：I am olny one no two97. 我是流氓我怕谁：I’m a scamp, I’m afraid of whom98. 我是中国人：I am in China99. 我要给你点颜色看看：I will give you some color to see see （好像也被黑人群体最近所采用）100. 五讲、四美、三热爱：five talk, four beauty, three lover101. 无钱无得：No money, no talk102. 笑里藏刀：A knife in the smile103. 心花怒放：heart flower angry open104. 眼看手勿动：look, see OK, no touch105. 要钱不给，要命有一条：want money no, want life one106. 要钱还是要命：money or life?107. 一分耕耘一分收穫：EVEN GAME WIN , EVEN SO WHOLE108. 一见钟情：One look clock love109. 意思意思：meaning meaning110. 一言既出，驷马难追：one word is out, four horses cannot chase111. 一元复苏，万象更新：one dollar restart, ten thousand elephant update 112. 远水解不了近渴：Far water car not save near thirsty113. 咱们兄弟谁跟谁啊：we brothers, who and who ah114. 怎么老是你：how old are you?115. 怎么是你：how are you?116. 朝三暮四：morning three night four （感谢台湾卡通，好像这个用法在孩子们中开始流行）117. 这样也行？：this too good?118. 知之为知之，不知为不知：know is know，no know is no know119. 中国人民万岁：China people ten thousand year120. 猪狗不如：PIG DOG BLUE121. 猪肉面条：pig noodle122. 猪头三，去死吧：pig 3 head,go dead!123. 走过路过，不要错过：go past no mistake past124. 走着瞧：go and look!125. 钻石王老五：diamond wang old five126. 作早操：do early [/size]Keep on going Never give upWhere there is a will , there is a way .Be yourself ,and be the person you help to be . （做你自己想要做的那种人）The most perfect human being is the one who most thoroughly addresses himself to the activity of his best powers !God helps those who help themselves！Where there is life, there is hope!“Yest erday is history;tomorrow is mystery;today is a gift.That's why it's called the present.”。
搞笑的中式英语翻译
搞笑的中式英语翻译前一段时间在微博上看到了类似“to male business”对公业务之类的爆笑中式英文，忍俊不禁之余也想和大家分享一些来中国人更加常用常见的中式英语。
扇贝叔希望大家笑过之后可以学会用英文的思维去说英文。
这里附上一篇从前的周刊文章：如何避免说中式英语1 Good good study, day day up. 好好学习，天天向上2 How are you ? How old are you? 怎么是你，怎么老是你？3 You have seed. I will give you some color to see see. Brothers！Together up! 你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！4 You ask me，me ask who？你问我，我问谁5 We two who and who? 咱俩谁跟谁？6 No three no four. 不三不四7 Horse horse tiger tiger. 马马虎虎8 One car come,one car go,two car pengpeng,one car died! 关于一场车祸的描述9 people moumtain people sea 人山人海10 If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要钱没有，要命一条11 Know is know, noknow is noknow. 知之为知之，不知为不知12 watch sister 表妹13 As far as you go to die. 有多远，死多远14 Four Glad Meatballs 直译：四个开心的肉球被用为：四喜丸子15 Chickens That Did Not Have Sexual Experience 童子鸡16 Dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse"s son can make hole! 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！17 Heart flower angry open. 心花怒放18 Go past, no mistake past. 走过路过，不要错过19 fire big 火大20 Wash after relief 用过请冲水解释：中国的厕所光冲（flush）不行，居然还要“洗”（wash）！。
英语圈留学生50条爆笑中式英语实录
23.我陪朋友去买车，当天逛了很多车行，留的电话全是我的
大家都知道，车行啊餐馆啊打电话给客户的时候都是以超级快的速度说了一大串东西，刚闯加拿大的我怎么听得清楚啊
某日，电话铃响，看电话号码是好像BMW打来的，愉快接听。
-- Hello .#￥%hhm*#￥%， It is a great day. @#$%^
10.有一天去kfc, 要土豆泥，不会说，就在那里根cashier苦喊potato sauce,
她以为我sb呢，
然后，丫给我了7,8带ketchup......。.
被鄙视了~~~~~
11.在加拿大帮老外拔火罐，但是罐很容易掉，我的英语不好，我解释说you have too much fur。他听了之后大笑it is hair ,not fur, fur is for animal。我也大笑了起来。
31.我朋友刚来，坐公车。有个传教士类的人特友好的跟他打招呼，说How is going. 他说go to school~~~~~那个人一下就不会了.。.
12.我朋友刚来的时候不认识什么人， 所以在班上试图交朋友， 一日， 觉得一白人哥们人挺好，
于是想要人家电话号码，日后做朋友， 于是问：HOW MANY IS YOU PHONE NUMBER?
白人说TEN. (加拿大号码是十位的)
13.刚来的时候，去BURGER KING去吃饭，点完汉堡，人家问我要酱不，我说要，人家问，哪种？我忘了番茄酱咋说了，想了半天，想出了个JAM,人家还听不懂，最后一赌气说，ITS UP TO YOU。
我们是两个人，所以two way=两位
16.第一次去唐人街吃粥，当时服务员都讲广东话。我叫了个果子(油条)和一碗粥。不久服务员就端了杯桔子汁，我以为送的，什么都没说，粥都喝完了，油条还没来。准备结帐时和服务员抱怨没吃到果子。服务员说：你的"果汁" 不是喝了么？
十大最搞笑中式英语
十大最搞笑中式英语中国是一个包罗万象的国家，以其独特的文化著称于世。
许多中国人习惯着以英语作为第二种语言。
尽管他们非常努力，尝试要学习掌握英语，但是仍然有一些“中式”的英语现象，同样的，充满了搞笑的趣味。
今天，让我们来看看十大最搞笑的中式英语。
第一，“全体都听我放屁”，在中国，这句话被认为是“All stand to attention”，表示大家都要静止不动。
但是，只要一个中国人用英语说这句话，就会给人一种“全体都听我放屁”的调侃意思，实在是太搞笑了。
第二，“多喝热水”，这句话被误用来代替“Drink more hot water”，原句所表达的意思是让人多喝热水，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“多喝热水”的搞笑话语。
第三，“干你娘”，这句话被误认为是“Thank you”，其实，他们想要表达的是一句“谢谢你”，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“干你娘”的搞笑话语。
第四，“面包没有酱”，这句话被误认为是“No butter”，原句所表达的意思是表明面包上面没有黄油，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“面包没有酱”的搞笑话语。
第五，“学习天起床”，这句话被误用来代替“Study hard”，原句是表明要让人学习努力，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“学习天起床”的搞笑话语。
第六，“病害我的”，这句话被误用来代替“I sick”，原句所表达的意思是表明“我感到不舒服”，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“病害我的”的搞笑话语。
第七，“特殊房间”，这句话被误用来代替“Special room”，原句所表达的意思是表明有一个特殊的房间，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“特殊房间”的搞笑话语。
第八，“一样的桌子”，这句话被误用来代替“Same table”，原句所表达的意思是表明有一张一样的桌子，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“一样的桌子”的搞笑话语。
第九，“小孩跑西边”，这句话被误用来代替“Go West”，原句所表达的意思是表明要让人向西走，但是，一旦被中国人说出来，就变成了一句“小孩跑西边”的搞笑话语。
中式英语笑话对话
A: Hey，Jack! Long time no see!B: Hi, Tom! (看起来很痛苦的样子)A: How are you?B: I am fine, thank you! and you?(正经脸) A: But you don’t look well. By the way, I heard that you are good at English!B:Horse horse，tigertiger!A: Horse horse，tigertiger?(困惑表情)B:马马虎虎啦！A:oh，my god! You should say just so so! B: Ok,just so so! No problem!A:However，I will have a check! You see, there are so many students.B:yes, people mountain, people sea!A: My goodness! What?B:人山人海！So stupid!A:Stupid? I think you should study hard! You can say a sea of people.B: ok，ok! I will good good study, day day up! A:I know it means好好学习，天天向上. Every Chinese students know this sentence. But you should say study hard and make progress every day!B:oh, yes, yes! I know，study hard and make progress every day.A:and then please translate the sentence! B:Let the horse come on! It is a piece of cake! A: come on! 你还放马过来！知之为知之，不知为不知B: So easy! Know is know, no know is no know!A: Don't pretend to know what you don't knowB: I really know!A: ok! Let us translate some easy sentences! B:translate?A:翻译！B:ok！A: how are you?B: I am fine, thank you! and you?A:oh , no! translate it! How are you?B:怎么是你？A: how old are you?B:怎么老是你？A: Stop! If you say Chinglish again, I will give you some colour to see see!B: you me you me!A: you me you me?B:彼此彼此！A: why do you say that?B: I will give you some colour to see see. It is also Chinese English. (大笑)A: fire big! You are a bad teacher! I will teach you a lesson!B: fire big?A:火大啊！stupid!B:Do not be angry. We are brothers, who and who ah!A:obviously! Your Chinglish is better than me! B: my watch sister taught me!A: watch sister? It is female cousin!B: I know, I know. I have to go to the hospital now.A: What happened to you?B: A car accident!A: no way! I am sorry to hear that!B: it does not matter! One car come, one car go. Two car dongdong, one car die! I’m the passer-by.A: How are you?B: I am fine, thank you! and you?(正经脸) A: Forget it! Go ahead!B: Go ahead? 去个头？A: 去吧去吧！。
最搞笑中式英语
最搞笑中式英语
中式英语是指中国人在使用英语时，由于语言和文化差异而产生的一些滑稽和有趣的表达方式。
下面是一些最搞笑的中式英语表达：
1. No money, no talk.（没有钱，就别废话）
2. You take my money and I give you silence.（你拿了我的钱，我给你沉默）
3. The meat is like my heart, soft and hard to blow.（肉就像我的心，柔软却难以吹）
4. Don't copy my face.（不要照搬我的脸）
5. He jump out, scare me one big jump.（他跳出来，把我吓了一个大跳）
6. You play me, play dead better.（你玩我，装死会更好）
7. I'm busy in a pan.（我在锅里忙）
8. Yesterday vomit today.（昨天呕吐，今天）
9. Hello, may I disturb you?（你好，可以抢劫一下吗？）
10. My English is poor, sorry, I speak Chinese better.（我的英语很差，对不起，我说中文更好）
这些表达方式不仅直接，而且常常使用了不恰当或者直译的词语，使得整个表达更加幽默滑稽。
中式英语因此也成为了一种独特的文化现象，在国际间产生了广泛的笑料。
但是，需要注意的是，这些表达方式并不正确，只是用来搞笑并展示语言和文化差异。
非常搞笑的英语翻译
非常搞笑的英语翻译很多人说起一些中式英语，常常令人啼笑皆非，下面是网友收集的一些经典的中式英语笑话，当然很多是杜撰的，看看你听说过几条?Howareyou?Howoldareyou?怎么是你，怎么老是你？Youhaveseed.Iwillgiveyousomecolortoseesee.Brothers！Togetherup!你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们，一起上！Dragonborndragon,chickenbornchicken,mouse"ssoncanmakehole!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！ChickensThatDidNotHaveSexualExperience童子鸡Youaskme，measkwho？你问我，我问谁Heartflowerangryopen.心花怒放Horsehorsetigertiger.马马虎虎Goodgoodstudy,daydayup.好好学习，天天向上Nothreenofour.不三不四Knowisknow,noknowisnoknow.知之为知之，不知为不知Ifyouwantmoney,Ihaveno;ifyouwantlife,Ihaveone!要钱没有，要命一条watchsister表妹firebig火大Asfarasyougotodie.有多远，死多远Wetwowhoandwho?咱俩谁跟谁？peoplemoumtainpeoplesea人山人海?????但是最近我在海外华人论坛上看到流传一组照片，是外国人的英译中文，更加令人捧腹。
有美国网友在搭乘皇家加勒比海(RoyalCaribbean)邮轮出游时，发现邮轮上菜单的翻译十分搞笑。
??????这份菜单上有着多国语言的翻译，有网友说，这根本就是Google翻译再版，例如英式烟肉(EnglishBacon)被直译为“英语培根”，而全脂牛奶(RegularMilk)则被翻成“规则牛奶”，绿豆汤(GreenSpiltPeaSoup)变成“绿分裂豌豆汤”。
中式搞笑英语
中式搞笑英语1. How are you? How old are you?怎么是你？怎么老是你？2. You ask me, me ask who?你问我，我问谁？3. We two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁？4. You is a dog.你是条狗。
5. Brothers！Together up!兄弟们，一起上！6. Dragon born dragon, chicken born chicken, mouse"s son can make hole! 龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！7. king eight eggs.王八蛋。
8. Heart flower angry open.心花怒放。
9. Horse horse tiger tiger.马马虎虎。
10. no care three seven twenty one.不管三七二十一。
11. Good good study, day day up.好好学习，天天向上。
12. No three no four.不三不四。
13. go and look.走着瞧。
14. Know is know, noknow is noknow.知之为知之，不知为不知。
15. Watch sister表妹16. Fire big火大17. As far as you go to die. 有多远，死多远。
18. We two who and who?咱俩谁跟谁？19. People moumtain people sea 人山人海20. love who who爱谁谁。
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爆笑“中式英语”最全集合 2009年03月10日16:58 新浪教育在国内，上英语课时班长喊“起立”Stand up，然后同学们向老师问好。
英语国家的人这时候会说All rise而不说Stand up ，这就是所谓的Chinglish即中式英语。
用中国人的方式说英语。
新浪外语频道联合汉普森英语，改变Chinglish征文共征集了40余部优秀作品，下面为本次参赛部分征文。
专家点评“中式英语”优秀作品：1. I very like it2. 这个价格对我挺合适的。
the price is very suitable for me。
3. 你是做什么工作的呢？What’s your job？4. 用英语怎么说？How to say？5. 明天我有事情要做。
I have something to do tomorrow？6. 我没有英文名。
I haven’t English name。
7. 我想我不行。
I think I can’t。
8. 我的舞也跳得不好。
I don’t dance well too。
9. 现在几点钟了？What time is it now？10. 我的英语很糟糕。
My English is poor。
11. 你愿意参加我们的晚会吗？Would you like to join our party on Friday？12. 我没有经验。
I have no experience。
13. 我没有男朋友。
I have no boyfriend。
14. 他的身体很健康。
His body is healthy。
15. 价钱很昂贵/便宜。
The price is too expensive/cheap。
16. 我们下了车。
We got off the car。
17. 车速快了。
The speed of the car is fast。
18. 这个春节你回家吗？Will you be going back home for the Spring Festival？19. 我觉得右手很疼。
I feel very painful in my right hand。
20. 他看到她很惊讶。
He looked at her and felt surprised。
21. 我读过你的小说但是没料到你这么年轻。
I have read your novels but I didnt think you could be so young。
22. 她脸红了，让我看穿了她的心思。
Her red face made me see through her mind。
23. 看到这幅画让我想到了我的童年时代。
The sight of these pictures made me remember my own childhood。
24. 别理她。
Dont pay attention to her。
25. 我在大学里学到了许多知识。
I get a lot of knowledge in the university。
26. 黄山正在读书。
Samuel is reading a book。
27。
永远记住你remember you forever28. 我遇到了很多困难。
I am having many difficulties。
29. 请快点走，否则我们会迟到的。
Please hurry to walk or well be late。
30. 她由嫉妒转向失望。
She was so jealous that she became desperate。
31. people moutain people sea 人山人海32. good good study,day day up 好好学习，天天向上33. no thank you不用谢34.Moon under old man 月下老人35.I will give you some color to see see. 我要给你点颜色看看36.Open the door see mountain开门见山37.Five flowers eight doors五花八门38.To take notice of safe 小心路滑39.Small two pots of heads 二锅头40.we two who and who!咱俩谁跟谁啊！41.how are you ? how old are you?怎么是你？怎么老是你？42.you have seed I will give you some color to see see, brothers!together up!你有种，我要给你点颜色瞧瞧，兄弟们！一起上！43.as far as you go to die！有多远死多远！44.hello everybody!if you have something to say,then say!if you have nothing to say,go home!有事起奏，无事退朝！45.you me you me彼此彼此46.You Give Me Stop!你给我站住！47.know is know，noknow is noknow知之为知之，不知为不知…48.WATCH SISTER 表妹49.dragon born dragon,chicken born chicken,mouse'son can make hole!!龙生龙，凤生凤，老鼠的儿子会打洞！50.I give you face you don't wanna face,you lose you face ,I turn my face 给你脸你不要脸，你丢脸，我翻脸51.one car come one car go ,two car pengpeng,people die车祸现场描述52.heart flower angry open心花怒放53.go past no mistake past 走过路过，不要错过54.小明：I am sorry!老外：I am sorry too!小明：I am sorry three!老外：What are you sorry for?小明：I am sorry five!55.If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one!要钱没有，要命一条56.I call Li old big. toyear 25。
我叫李老大，今年25。
57.you have two down son 你有两下子。
58.good good study,day day up! 好好学习，天天向上：59.Open the door see mountain开门见山60.five flowers eight doors五花八门61.Un-ding-able顶不住了62.You go see see你去看看63.so many people die, no see you die。
甘多人死吾见你死64.die away 死开65.Oil gate加油站66.To run business营业中67.Small two pots of heads二锅头68.Disabled Elevators残疾人电梯69. With a comet like him, nothing can be accomplished有他这颗扫帚星，什么事情都办不成。
70.Some prefer radish but others prefer cabbage萝卜青菜，各有所爱71.He has always got a hard mouth and never admit a fault。
他一向嘴硬，从不认错72.The teacher likes this sweet-mouthed little girl very much老师很喜欢这个嘴甜的小姑娘。
73.The student all dislike him because he often pats the teacher's ass同学们都很讨厌他，因为他经常拍老师的马屁。
74.Almost all people think that the other mountain is higher than the one he's standing on. They never feel saisfied with what they've already got。
人都是这山望着那山高，对自己的现状没有满意的时候。
75.fight south and north转战南北76.The professor teaches badly这个教授教得很烂。
77.Beijing's winning the bid for the Olympics makes our blood boil北京申奥成功的消息令我们热血沸腾。
78.Don't listen to their babbling别听他们胡说八道79.she is the pearl on her father's hand at home。
在家里她可是父亲的掌上明珠。
zy worm 懒虫81.So it is原来如此82.Doingshi imitates Xishi 东施效颦83.a night cat夜猫子84.Chicken Without Sexual Life童子鸡85.Twice—cooked Pork回锅肉86.pen see you鄙视你87.four happy dumplines四喜丸子二。
standing tickets 站票vice-professor；副教授early love；早恋Don't fall down；当心滑跌I'll go to visit my uncle and say "Happy New Year" to him today。
May you become wealthy. 恭喜发财It's hard to do business in light seasons. 淡季生意不好做。
Be careful of landslide 小心地滑Deformed men lavatory 残疾人厕位Please obey the orders of the missionary 服从站台工作人员安排Baby& Mother soldiers waiting lounge 母婴军人候车室Small scaled parking lot 小型停车场Come in is forbiden;in case of penalty 请勿入内；违者罚款；Don't span 请勿跨越Take care of the gap 小心站台间隙Visitors Declined 观众止步Meet carefully 小心碰头Mind your steps 小心台阶Breakdown service 维修三。