三分钟英语演讲稿幽默
英语演讲稿笑话（精选多篇）
-------------------------------------------------------精选财经经济类资料---------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 英语演讲稿笑话(精选多篇) two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. he doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. the other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. he gasps, “my friend is dead! what can i do?”. th e operator says “calm down. i can help. first, let’s make sure he’s dead.” there is a silence, then a shot is heard. back on the phone, the guy says “ok, now what?”简单翻译: 两个猎人在森林里打猎,突然甲倒下了并且看上去不再呼吸了,眼睛也变得呆滞. 乙赶紧拿起电话打给救护中心,上气-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 不接下气的说:”我的朋友死了,怎么办?.”服务人员说:”淡定,我有办法.首先,我们嘚确保他是死了.” 安静了一会儿,电话里响起了一阵枪声,电话那头乙说道:”好了,那接下来怎么办.”下面是被评选世界第二搞笑的笑话：sherlock holmes and dr watson were going camping. they pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. sometime in the middle of the night holmes woke wat son up and said: “watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see.”watson replied: “i see millions and millions of stars.”holmes said: “and what do you deduce from that?”watson replied: “well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it ’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. and if -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.”and holmes said: “watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”简单翻译:甲乙一起去野营.他俩在星光下搭好帐篷然后睡去. 半夜的某时,甲叫醒乙:”抬头看看那些星星,然后告诉我你发现了什么”乙:”我看见好多好多的星星.”甲:”如此你能推断出什么结论?”乙回答道:”嗯假如天上有无数的恒星,而且其中一些有自己的行星,那么很有可能就会有像地球一样的星球存在.假如有像地球一样的星球存在,那里还可能存在生物.”甲无语:”你个sb.这说明有人偷了我们的帐篷.”英语笑话笑话一：a woman gets on a bus with her b aby. the bus driver says: “that’s the ugliest baby that i’ve ever seen. ugh!” the woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- down, fuming. she says to a man next to her: “the driver just insulted me!” the man says: “you go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, i’ll hold your monkey for you.”笑话二：sherlock holmes and dr watson were going camping. they pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. sometime in the middle of the night holmes woke watson up and said: “watson, look up at the sky, and tell me what you see.” watson replied: “i see millions and millions of stars.” holmes said: “and what do you deduce from that?” watson replied: “well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it ’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. and if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.” and holmes said: “watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”1.a boy swore to a girl: ‘honey, do -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- please marry me, otherwise i’ll die’the girl refused. sixty years later, the boy died. 一男生向一女生发誓：亲爱的，请你一定要嫁给我，不然我会死掉的女孩拒绝了。
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟下面是小编为大家整理的英语演讲稿幽默3分钟，仅供大家进行参考。
范文【一】Someone said we are reading the first verse of the first chapter of a book, whose pages are infinite. I dont know who wrote these words, but Ive always liked them as a reminder that the future can be anything we want it to be. We are all in the position of the farmers. If we plant a good seed ,we reap a good harvest. If we plant nothing at all, we harvest nothing at all.We are young. How to spend the youth? It is a meaningful question. To answer it, first I have to ask what do you understand by the word youth? Youth is not a time of life, its a state of mind. Its not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips or supple knees. Its the matterof the will. Its the freshness of the deep spring of life.A poet said To see a world in a grain of sand, and a heaven in a wild flower, hold infinity in the palm of your hand, and eternity in an hour. Several days ago, I had a chance to listen to a lecture. I learnt a lot there. Id like to share it with all of you. Lets show our right palms. We can see threelines that show how our love.career and life is. I have a short line of life. What about yours? I wondered whether we could see our future in this way. Well, lets make a fist. Where is our future? Where is our love, career, and life? Tell me.Yeah, it is in our hands. It is held in ourselves.We all want the future to be better than the past. But the future can go better itself. Dont cry because it is over, smile because it happened. From the past, weve learnt that the life is tough, but we are tougher. Weve learnt that we cant choose how we feel, but we can choose what about it. Failure doesnt mean you dont have it,it does mean you should do it in a different way. Failure doesnt mean you should give up, it does mean you must try harder.As what I said at the beginning, we are reading the first verse of the first chapter of a book, whose pages are infinite. The past has gone. Nothing we do will change it. But the future is in frront of us. Believe that what we give to the world, the world will give to us. And from today on, lets be the owners of ourselves, and speak out We are the world, we are the future.翻译：有人说我们正在读一本书的第一章的第一节,页数无限的。
三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文模板
三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文模板演讲稿是人们在工作和社会生活中经常使用的一种文体。
它可以用来交流思想，感情，表达主张，见解。
也可以用来介绍学习，工作情况和经验等等。
下面小编就同大家聊聊关于三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文，希望有所帮助！三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文1Every one of us, rich or poor, should at least have one or two good friends. My friends will listen to me when I want to speak, will wipe my eyes when I cry, will take care of me when I am sick, and my friends will go together with me side by side through this journey of life.As students, we could share more time with our friends. The friendship in our young hearts is pure, fresh and simple. I often feel very lucky to have a lot of good friends. Especially when I had Justin as one of my best friends. Justin was my English teacher from the USA. I met him in 1996 when I was a student who could only speak very little English. Justin was a vivid young man with a bright smile on his face, and he always had his special way to make the class active and attractive. He taught us English by telling stories, playing games, singing songs, and even dancing.I could still remember very clearly that one afternoon when we fin-ished our class, we went to some other classes to sing songs for them, just like what people do in the states on Christmas Eve. It was so interesting and unforgettable. Justin was an e_cellent teacher, because he taught us not only how to study English well, but also the way to find out the beauty of the world and the way to be angels to others' lives. I know there was friendship and pure love in our hearts. Facing this valuable emotion neither nationality nor age was important, the realimportance lay in faith,under-standing, and care. Justin is the best friend I have ever had, and I know I will cherish those days of staying together with him as the best part of my memory.Friendship is a kind of treasure in our lives. It is actually like a bottle of wine, the longer it is kept, the sweeter it will be. It is also like a cup of tea. When we are thirsty, it will be our best choice, but when we have enough time to enjoy ourselves, it is also the most fragrant drink.However, in this fast-developing modern society, the reality is not that. More and more people forget to enjoy the beauty of life and -the beauty of friendship. They work hard in order to gain a higher position, in the society and to earn more money for their work. Of course, we don't deny that it is important to find a bet-ter place in our lives, but we wish more and more people could pay a little more attention tothemselves and their friends. All of us have to spare some time for personal lives. We have to find the chance to e_press our emotion and love. When staying with our friends, we can release ourselves completely. We can do whatever we want, we can laugh together, talk together, and even cry to-gether. I should say that being together with our best friends is the most wonderful moment of our lives.As we know, we would feel lonely if we didn't even have a friend. But it doesn't mean we could depend on our friends all the time. There is a famous motto saying that “A friend is like a quilt with cotton wadding, but the real thing that keeps you warm is your own temperature.” It is really true. We have to work hard together with our friends, encourage each other and help each other. When we receive love and friendship, we should repay as much as we can.Finally, let's pray together now that one day, all of us could find the person we want to find, and could enjoy a real beautiful friendship in our lives. Let's pray the flower of friendship be-tween our friends and us would always bloom brightly in our hearts.三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文2hello! everyone. i’m tang jingting. i’ am eleven years old. i’m from e_periment primary school. i’m in class 1，grade 5, . nice to meet you.i’m a happy girl. there are three members in my family: my father, my mother and i. both of my parents love me very much and i love them too.i have many hobbies, such as sports, singing and reading books. and i play the piano very well. but i love animals most. now i will tell you about my favorite animal. today my topic is my favorite animal.my favorite animaldo you know what my favorite animal is? it is one of the most precious animals. their bodies are very long. they live in the sea. they live on fish, shrimps and so on.they are very clever. people often train them，so that they can give it show which brings people a lot of happiness and joy.they are very friendly and peaceful. they never attack people. instead, they have saved many people in danger in the past years. how helpful they are!can you guess its name now? yes, you are right. they are dolphins.however, unluckily, the number of dolphins is getting smaller and smaller. because of water pollution, there is less and less space for dolphins. many people make money by huntingdolphins. if we don’t protect them，maybe we’ll lose our good friends one day. as a student, i hope more and more people should protect dolphins.i love dolphins very much. and i hope dolphins are our good friends for ever. i hope they can live in the blue sea happily and peacefully. let’s protect the animals together. let’s take actions.三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文3Hello! Everyone. I’m Tony, an 11-year-old happy boy.I live with my parents and we love each other.I have many hobbies, such as sports, singing and reading books.And I love animals most. Now I will tell you about my favorite animal.They are very precious sea animals with long bodies.Theylive on fish, shrimps and so on.They are very clever. People often train them for performances which brings us a lot of happiness and joy.They are very friendly and peaceful. They never attack people. Instead, they have saved many people in danger.Now,do you know what they are? Yes, you are right. They are dolphins.I hope we can take actions to protect dolphins, so they will always be with us.三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文4Good morning, honorable judges:My name is Fang Shuo. My topic is: I’m the spokesman of Jining.Jining is the birthplace of Confucius, Mencius, Yan Hui, Zeng Shen and Zisi， Wi th the Great Canal passing by; it’s called the Holy Land in the East, and the kingdom of manners.You could find the trace of the saint in the Confucius Temple, Confucian Family Residence and Confucian Cemetery. You couldenjoy the peculiar rocks on the Yishan Mountian, the beautiful scenes in Quanlin of Sishui, the lotus flowers in the Weishan Lake, and the stories of the 108 heroes on the Liangshan Hill.Confucius said, “It’s always a great pleasure to greet a friend from afar.” Welcome to Jining!三分钟幽默演讲稿英语范文5Hello, everyone, I’m Liu Dongdong. I’m a student. There are three people in my family—my father, mother and I.My father is 40 years old. He is a worker. I think he is a good worker. Because he works very hard. He gets up very early every day and he works for more than 10 hours a day. So he is always busy, he looks very tired when he gets 小学home. He likes reading newspapers. He usually reads it after supper. So he gets lots of news.My mother is 38 years old. She is a worker too. She works in a very small factory. She is not tall and she has two big eyes. She loves me and she is good for me. She always buys some books for me. She wants me to be a top student. She also cares for my diet and life.I’ m 15 years old. I wear glasses. I like reading. I al ways read books after school. I like singing, too. My favorite singer is Jay Chou. His music is very nice. What do you think of him? I also like making friends. If you want to meet me, please write to me.Oh, my parents love me and I love them, too. My family is a happy family.。
有趣的三分钟英语演说（精选15篇）
有趣的三分钟英语演说（精选15篇）有趣的三分钟英语演说篇1Good evening, Ladies and Gentlemen:I'd like to start with a group of pictures.“Modern and advanced”This society forgets, and ignores the other two thirds of human beings. It's far from the ideal! We call ideal as a utopian, a place where reality does not exist. A few people still look forward to the ideals. We make fun of them, considering they are naive. Will we still be content to live in such a society, if misfortune drops to us? No! Of cause not!When we feel the warmth of the sun, these people, endure great sorrows and pains. Can we imagine that? They are our brother and sisters!Facing them, will we still complain about our own misfortune?Facing them, will we still have the mood shouting for our own freedom? Facing them, will we still want to have more and more unnecessary stuff?They are unable to meet their needs, even the basic needs of survival! Everyone, as a member of humanity, shouldn't feel ashamed? Our luxury deprived their lives, our indifference violated our soul, and our barbarity destroyed human civilization!What's the ideal society? It's a society no one worries about their living, a society no one is refused from education, a society everyone can pursue his/her own happiness! The ideal society is filled with love, joy and kindness. In that society, we can touch the other's hearts, we can share our dreams and most important, we can just be the true men!Let's break the ethnic divide, bridge the gap between rich and poor, hand in hand, to build a Great wall, protecting us fromevil; to construct a steady bridge, connecting reality to the ideal society! Let's pursue for that, that's the only way to the bright future! They are watching us! Thank you!Smoking is a greater cause of death and disability than any single disease, says the World Health Organisation.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇2Good afternoon,ladies and gentlemen!I'm very honored to stand here and give you a short speech! To begin with ,I want to ask a question .Does everybody dream a good dream last night? Actually ,today I want to talk about dream with you. Of course, What I want to talk is not a dream you have last night,but a dream—— about life.Everyone has dreams about life, different dreams at different life stage,and we need dreams to support us. Dreams are like the stars we never reach in the sky,but like most mariners,we can chart our course by them. With the dream,we have a direction,with a direction, we were no longer confused.With the dream, there is hope,With hope, we have the strength to fight.I have a dream: To be a doctor.，because doctor may relieve the pain of patients. May let the human change the health. At the same time, I believed that, those who help others may be able to obtain joyfully. Therefore, I hoped in the near future ,I might be a doctor.But I know，life is tough,and there are always ups and downs, maybe we fail in the way to our aims,and we may feel depressed ,whenever at this time, the dream in our heart can always comfort us, encourage us ,and support us to move ahead.Young!Fortunately, I am young now. Just due to it, I know that nothing is impossible.I firmly believe that nothing can stand in my way. If I can't realize my dream,it result from that I haven'twork harder enough and I won't find other excuses. If no people believe you, you can make it to prove that you are right. If you think the god haven't blessed you and there is no truth here, you can become the god and create the truth.“My breath swallows the sky and make the yellow river overflow, my sword is famous in Kyushu and it can collapse the five sacred mountains.” At some time in the past I also had am bitious words and I had some achievements. Each achievement results from my hard work. I always believe that “If you want to have more achievements than others, you must work harder.” In some extent, the dream is the hope. If you can insist on doing something, the victory will come.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇3My favourite super star is JJ , he has a lovely dimple and his eyes are also very lovely . Now let me tell you the story about JJ .He enterde the music indestry at the year 20xx , before that year ,he was only a boy who wrote songs for many super stars ,his songs were liked by many people but no one care who was the writer . He was noly hard to write songs because he like music ,he thought music has it soal , if you sing it by heart , it well be lived.I like a song of him , it's name is CRIES IN A DISTANCE , the song tells us ,nothing is sad if we belive the hope . He has many difficulty , but his song says , cries in a distance , can't stop the tremble , I'm just waiting my turn , hiding will never , save me forever , the guns gonne get me for sure . Dear god I pray why won't you be my friend , come to me and take my hand ,like mama would say everything will be ok.Now he is not rather a shy singer and performer , the lyrical songs make him mature ,and now he is a man or not a boy.He is a real super star with many fans ,the improve mark abig step forward confident.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇4feeling of youthno young man believes he shall ever die. it was a saying of my brother's, and a fine one. there is a feeling of eternity in youth, which makes us amend for everything. to be young is to be as one of the immortal gods. one half of time indeed is flown-the other half remains in store for us with all its countletreasures; for there is no line drawn, and we see no limit to our hopes and wishes. we make the coming age our own-the vast, the unbounded prospect lies before us.death. old age. are words without a meaning. that paby us like the idea air which we regard not. others may have undergone, or may still be liable to them-we "bear a charmed life“, which laughs to scorn all such sickly fancies. as in setting out on delightful journey, we strain our eager gaze forward- bidding the lovely scenes at distance hail!and see no end to the landscape, new objects presenting themselves as we advance; so, in the commencement of life, we set no bounds to our inclinations. nor to the unrestricted opportunities of gratifying them. we have as yet found no obstacle, no disposition to flag; and it seems that we can go on so forever. we look round in a new world, full of life, and motion, and ceaseleprogress; and feel in ourselves all the vigor and spirit to keep pace with it, and do not foresee from any present symptoms how we shall be left behind in the natural course of things, decline into old age, and drop into the grave. it is the simplicity, and as it were abstractedneof our feelings in youth, that (so to speak) identifies us with nature, and (our experience being slight and our passions strong) deludes us into a belief ofbeing immortal like it. our short-lives connection with existence we fondly flatter ourselves, is an indissoluble and lasting union-a honeymoon that knows neither coldness, jar, nor separation. as infants smile and sleep, we are rocked in the cradle of our wayward fancies, and lulled into security by the roar of the universe around us0we quaff the cup of life with eager haste without draining it, instead of which it only overflows the more-objects prearound us, filling the mind with their magnitude and with the strong of desires that wait upon them, so that we have no room for the thoughts of death.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇5As we all know, the most important thing in life is our attitude towards it, tons of men have tried different ways of treating life, and some succeeded, some failed, and here are some of the tips they left us.Life isn’t about keeping score. Life isn’t about your shoes or your hair or the color of your skin. In fact it’s not about if you have lots of friends or if you are alone, and it’s not about how accepted or unaccepted you are. Life just isn’t about that.But life is about whom you love and who you hurt. It’s about how you feel about yourself. It’s about trust, happiness and compassion. It’s about sticking up for your friends and replacing inner hate with love. Life is about avoiding jealousy, overcoming ignorance and building confidence. It’s about what y ou say and what you mean. It’s about seeing people for who they are and not what they have. And we should always remember to be ourselves. Other might have things that we desire but being what we really are is the only trail leading to the true colors of l ife. Most of all, it’s about choosing to use your life to touch someone else’s in a way that could have never beenachieved otherwise.The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers; we buy more but enjoy them less. We’ve learnt how to make a living but not a life, we’ve added years to life, but not life to years. And it is time for us to choose whether to make a difference in our life.And these choices are what life is about.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇6Everybody is good! Welcome to badaling scenic area tourism. Accompany you visit together, today I am very happy, hope all can spend a good time in badaling.Right now, I would go to visit the doorBadaling Great Wall, and now, I'll about matters needing attention: the Great Wall is one of the famous wonders of the world, it is like a dragon entrenched in north China's vast land. It is the crystallization of labor people's blood law in ancient China, is also a symbol of ancient Chinese culture and the pride of the Chinese nation, please don't scribble on the brick fluidized.Visitors, now we have come to the famous badaling Great Wall, to the distance, you can see the Great Wall is divided into south and north two peak, winding in the mountain ridges, long teng hu yue, spectacular, the scenery is very spectacular. Look here is a two openings and u-shaped walls satin afraid brought to the barbican. Both inside and outside the barbican wall on both sides have the crenel wall.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇7Last month, I happened to watch an interview of a Chinese student studying abroad. At one point the hostess asked: "For how long have you been away from home?" "Three years," he said. "How do you keep in touch with your parents?" "We wroteemails," the young man replied proudly. "Then I guess your parents learned how to send an email just because of you, right?" Having heard this from the hostess, the young man was speechless for a long time. Indeed, in the world today, it is not easy for the elder generation to keep up to date with the rapid development of technology.This story reminded me of my concerns when I first left home for college three years ago: My parents don't understand English. They couldn't identify the buttons marked in English on our remote controls. So when I was away from home, who would help them select Chinese subtitles when they wanted to watch a foreign movie on our DVD? My parents don't use pinyin, the phonetic symbols for Chinese. Therefore, they couldn't input Chinese characters into their cell phones using the keyboard. Without me, whom could they depend on when they needed to reply to a text message? I worried a lot, so before I left, I carefully prepared a flow chart on how to operate the DVD player, and stored as many template messages in my parents' phones as I could possibly think of.Fortunately, my efforts did work for my parents. However, what makes me more optimistic is that society at large is becoming more concerned about the elder generation, and the fruit of technological innovation is no longer believed to be an asset only for the young people. T oday, with simple Chinese instructions on the remote control, even my 80-year-old grandfather can play his favorite TV program on a DVD. Last year, with the money I earned from a part-time job, I bought my mother a new cell phone which supports handwritten messages instead of inputting words through a keyboard. And now, my mother no longer has to use the templates messages I've storedfor her, instead, she now sends me messages as long as 300 words. The joy I have when reading those text messages is inexpressible, not only because of the words she writes, but also because our technology has indeed become a real blessing in her life.Two years ago, the counter service in our neighborhood bank was replaced by an ATM station. With those intelligent machines, people can carry out all their regular banking services. My father, however, was not used to such a change. Thereafter, he always walked three blocks further to a bank with a counter to use their services. In the future, however, this will no longer happen, because when I went to that ATM station again last spring festival, I found a delightful change: the terminals there have adopted a voice guidance system. While I was there, I noticed a grey haired man using the voice instructions. And despite his hesitation between pressing the buttons, he left the bank with a satisfactory smile. What a marvel! My vision for the future was unfolding before my very eyes. At that moment, I rejoiced thinking of my father, someday, standing there using the banking service. I rejoiced thinking of myself that when I become old, the new inventions can still ease my life rather than making the life harder.有趣的三分钟英语演说篇8A helping hand 伸出援手A man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand.He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down."Is this yours?" he asked.She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed.On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I'm about to have dinner. There's plenty. Would you like to join me?"He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I've had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?"The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?""No," she replied, "Only those who catch my eye."有趣的三分钟英语演说篇9Cherish what we are enjoyingIt is a report about the new planet which holds possibility for life.这是一篇关于发现了一颗有生命可能性的星球的报告。
幽默英语演讲稿范文(共6篇)
篇一：幽默英语演讲稿幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without 我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....when you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人． but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each stepgets easier.但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物．每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松．love your mother always永远爱你的母亲，and keep her smiling并且使她微笑常在篇二：幽默英语演讲稿幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的... the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣? god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without 我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances. even when her child has hurt her badly....she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and i fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work,i also gave her a tear to shed.it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....when you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good. 因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人． but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.但是，也把这个信息传递给男人，因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物．每一天，生活中都会有必须爬的山，但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松． love your mother always永远爱你的母亲，and keep her smiling并且使她微笑常在篇三：新初中幽默英语演讲稿新初中幽默英语演讲稿love your mother爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈.because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said,and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系...later the little boy asked his father,why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say......所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...the little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, why do women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,篇四：英语演讲幽默开场白英语演讲幽默开场白作为一个演讲者，我从观众那只得到过两种抱怨：一种是我讲话声音太大了，他们无法入睡；第二种是我讲得时间太长了，他们无法一直清醒。
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟(精选16篇)
英语演讲稿幽默3分钟（精选16篇）英语演讲稿幽默3分钟篇1Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold night.Today my topic is about choice and process.A research shows that a man has to make 73 choices one day.With so many choices one day, people easily get so confused and afraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true part of life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than the choice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life, which the process makes the difference. Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gump made no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with his strong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudes and feelings ,the caution, courage and persistance we have as we encounter new experience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed my major when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh for me.I cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closely related to mathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief that this is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,I persisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my life. Gradually I could understand some parts and even found maths interesting.Moreover, I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,the choice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the past four months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.NO matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, your potential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress will come to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can you see it.These make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong for me to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain a and enjoy this fantastic experience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy theprocess. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after you chose to come here. Thank you!翻译：晚上好,女士们,先生们: 非常感谢您选择在这样一个寒冷的夜晚。
幽默英文演讲稿范文5篇
幽默英文演讲稿范文5篇演讲稿可以用来交流思想和感情，表达主张和见解;也可以用来介绍自己的学习、工作情况和经验等，具有宣传、鼓动、教育和欣赏等作用。
下面是小编整理的幽默英文演讲稿，欢迎大家阅读分享借鉴。
幽默英文演讲稿1Good morning everybody, I’m very glad to stand here and give you a short speech. We all know that Bingxin has a famous saying “we always admire the beauty of flowers but its sprout was watered by tears of struggle and rained by blood of sacrifice”. So for the majority, behind their success, are filled of sweat and tears. Eagle flying in the vast firmament, must be experienced the pain of countless times fall under the cliff, then hammered out a pair of volley wings. A shinning of pearls, inevitably suffered countless body friction and numerous waves’ shock. In this view, a real successful people, and he must experienced numerous times to stand up again and agin after failed, because without sweat and tears on the life road ,no one can casually get the beautiful flowers. Alfter a heavy fall Shi Tiesheng lost his legs, it must be a heavy blow for anyone. But he didn't lose faith in life, but use his brain and hands to show the infinite love of life;Beethoven was blind and deaf, but he still had written the "Hero""Destiny"nd so on a large number of music works, in his unfortunately life, he doggedly gripped the "fate of the throat. They all had a fall, but they are strong enough to stand up, fight against fate and misfortune, finally they succeed. So for each of us, wrestling is not terrible, lose confidence and courage in life is the most terribe thing. In my opionion, the sweat and tears during the life’ journey are very important for us, they hone ourwill, and enrich our experience. As the saying goes, how can you see the rainbow without a rainy day, while you don't work hard and not struggle, how can you gain the successful flowers. All in all, the sweat and tears on the struggling road is inevitable, don’t look for shortcuts anymore, steadfast walk every step, we will succeed in the end. So belief yourself, nothing is impossile, just do it. Thank you for taking your time to listen to my speech, I hope in the near future we all can be successful.幽默英文演讲稿2The hours of a wise man are lengthened by his ideas as those of a fool are by his passions. The time of the one is long, because he does not know what to do with it; as is that of the other, because he distinguishes every moment of it with useful or amusing thoughts, or in other words, because the one is always wishing it away, and the other always enjoying it.How different is the view of past life, in the man who is grown old in knowledge and wisdom, from that of him who is grown in ignorance and folly? The latter is like the owner of a barren country, that fills his eye with the [1] prospect of naked hills and plains, which produce nothing either profitable or [2] ornamental; the other [3] beholds a beautiful and spacious landscape, divided into delightful gardens, green meadows, fruitful fields, and can scarce [4] cast his eye upon a single spot of his possessions, that is not covered with some beautiful plant or flower.幽默英文演讲稿3Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane lan ded, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."幽默英文演讲稿4There is a wonderful word which expresses the most original motions and desires among human-beings. With solving any kind of imperfections, our world has moved ahead. This is the word “innovation” that we cannot afford to lose.We chicaned every detail of the innovation. Thousands years before, we created fire when we took a stone to knock anotherone. Since Han Dynasty, four great inventions had been created and it is one of the greatest signs that China become to the ancient civilized country. And nowadays, thousands of software, products, architectures and public facilities have upgraded more than that about 100 years ago. So how did these happen? What will you do if you are not satisfied with your tools anymore? What will you do if old mode cannot afford to develop in a company? There is no doubt that we should innovate no matter where we are and what we do. Not because of the design itself, but actually for its intended purpose.If there was no Apple, everyone could not imagine how to contact others easily and enjoy a better Internet surfing.If there was no Microsoft, perhaps we still worked in a dim office and duplicate some troublesome documents. If there was no Newton, and no theory of gravity, maybe I will win the Nobel Prize like Newton rather than just standing here. I have heard that three apple changed the world. The first one seduced Eve. The second one awakened Newton. The third one was in the hands of Steve Jobs. We sort of think the innovation of the world began with apple. I imagine lots of people want to become another Newton or Jobs right now with just one hand to change the world, right? Have the innovation to follow your heart. It somehow already reflects what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.Via questioning, we can start to innovate. Via innovating, we can start to create better lives. No innovation, no improvement. No improvement, no success. And no success, no civilization. Now, our time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life! Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice! Don't let yourself down! It is the innovation that wecannot afford to lose!幽默英文演讲稿5Good morning teachers and fellow students. Today we would like to introduce a few favorite books to you.My favorite book is (Italian: Cuore). This is a diary written by an Italian boy Enrico. The diary is about his life and study. It included various touching stories that happened around Enrico, the mottos taught by his parents, as well as the wonderful ten "monthly" stories told by his teacher during the class. Every word in the chapter describes the word "love". From patriotism to friendship, and to the love between parents and child -- really touching.This novel taught me how to love, and how to learn from love.I really like this book very much. How about you? What is your favorite book?My favorite book is . Have you read it before?Oh, I haven’t read this book before. What is it about?Well, it is a story of a rich girl who maintained her noble character after the bankruptcy of her father. The story is happy ending.Can you tell us why you love this book so much?Sure. It is because the story taught us to be brave and to face the challenges and difficulties with courage. I am deeply impressed by the strength and perseverance of the little princess in the story. I have decided to learn from her from now on.Oh I see, the story sounds very good. I cannot wait to read this book as well.。
英文三分钟搞笑演讲
英文三分钟搞笑演讲英语演讲，也可以很风趣很幽默的，想知道怎么写好英文的搞笑演讲稿吗?下面是店铺为你整理的几篇英文三分钟搞笑演讲，希望能帮到你哟。
英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇一A helping handA man who lived in a block of apartments thought it was raining and put his head out the window to check. As he did so a glass eye fell into his hand.He looked up to see where it came from in time to see a young woman looking down."Is this yours?" he asked.She said, "Yes, could you bring it up?" and the man agreed.On arrival she was profuse in her thanks and offered the man a drink. As she was very attractive he agreed. Shortly afterwards she said, "I'm about to have dinner. There's plenty. Would you like to join me?"He readily accepted her offer and both enjoyed a lovely meal. As the evening was drawing to a close the lady said, "I've had a marvelous evening. Would you like to stay the night?"The man hesitated then said, "Do you act like this with every man you meet?""No," she replied, "Only those who catch my eye."英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇二Good morning teachers and fellow students. Today we would like to introduce a few favorite books to you.My favorite book is (Italian: Cuore). This is a diary written by an Italian boy Enrico. The diary is about his life and study. It included various touching stories that happened around Enrico,the mottos taught by his parents, as well as the wonderful ten "monthly" stories told by his teacher during the class. Every word in the chapter describes the word "love". From patriotism to friendship, and to the love between parents and child -- really touching.This novel taught me how to love, and how to learn from love.I really like this book very much. How about you? What is your favorite book?My favorite book is . Have you read it before?Oh, I haven t read this book before. What is it about?Well, it is a story of a rich girl who maintained her noble character after the bankruptcy of her father. The story is happy ending.Can you tell us why you love this book so much?Sure. It is because the story taught us to be brave and to face the challenges and difficulties with courage. I am deeply impressed by the strength and perseverance of the little princess in the story. I have decided to learn from her from now on.Oh I see, the story sounds very good. I cannot wait to read this book as well.英文三分钟搞笑演讲篇三Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."。
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幽默英语演讲稿love your mother 爱你的母亲why are you crying, a young boy asked his mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈. because im a woman, she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他.i dont understand, he said.我不明白.他回答his mom just hugged him and said, and you never will, but thats o.k........妈妈拥抱了他说,你永远也不会明白,但没关系... later the little boy asked his father, why does mom seem to cry for no reason?.后来小男孩问他的父亲妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣? all women cry for no reason, was all his dad could say...... 所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣,这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的... the little boy grew up andbecame a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候, 他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finally he put in a call to god and when god got back to him, he asked god, whydo women cry so easily?最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣? god answered......上帝回答:when i made woman,i decided she had to be special.i made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet, 当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...i gave her the inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejectioneven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛, 也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害, 甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...i gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends, even when everyone else gives up, through sickness and fatigue without 我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进, 并且照顾自己的家人和朋友, 甚至当每个人都放弃的时候, 她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...i gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances.even when her child has hurt her badly.... she has the very special power to make a childs boo-boo feel better and to quella teenagers anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候．．．她用那特别的力量，让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰，也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧．．．i gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faults and i fashionedher from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫，尽管他会犯错．我用男人的肋骨创造了女人，使女人可以保护男人的心脏．．．i gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimestests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧，让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子，但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心．for all of this hard work, i also gave her a tear to shed. it is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness.... when you see her cry, tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even though she may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good. 因为这些种种的困难，我也同样赐她流下眼泪，这是当她在需要时可以使用的，这是她唯一的软弱之处．．．当你看到她哭泣的时候，告诉她你有多么地爱她，告诉她她为所有人所做的一切，即使这样她可能还是会哭泣，但你会使她的心里得到安慰．she is special!please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and specialwomen in their lives.她是独特的！请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人，有母亲，姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人．but, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thinga woman is.篇二：3-5分钟英语演讲稿(30篇)最好英语演讲稿汇总3——5分钟英语演讲稿汇总（30篇）六、周怡雪，19岁，上海i believe in our futurehonorable judges, fellow students: good afternoon!recently, ther is a heated debate in our society. the college students are thebeneficiaries of a rare privilege, who receive exceptional education at extraordinary places. but will we be able to face the challenge and supportourselves against all odds? will we be able to better the lives of others? will webe able to accept the responsibility of building the future of our country? the cynics say we care for nothing other than grades; and we neglect the needfor character cultivation. but again, the cynics are wrong. we care deeply for eachother, we cherish freedom, we treasure justice, and we seek truth. last week,thousands of my fellow students had their blood type tested in order to make acontribution for the children who suffer from blood cancer. as college students, we are adolescents at the critical turning point in our lives.we all face a fundamental choice: cynicism or faith, each will profoundly impact ourfuture, or even the future of our country. i believe in all my fellow classmates.though we are still inexperienced and even a little bit childish. i believe that wehave the courage and faith to meet any challenge and take on our responsibilities.we are preparing to assume new responsibilities and tasks, and to use the educationwe have received to make our world a better place. i believe in our future.我对未来充满信心尊敬的评委，各位同学：下午好！最近，社会上有一场很激烈的争论。
大学生是一种稀有特权的享有者，在很棒的地方接受高等教育。
但是，我们能面对挑战而无所畏惧吗？我们能够改善他人的生活吗？我们能够承担建设祖国未来的重任吗？怀疑论者说大学生是被宠坏的一代，一丁点挫折都受不了。
但是他们错了，我所看到的大学生正在努力的学习独立生活。
我们互相帮助打扫卫生，一起上街砍价购物，一起参加兼职工作来赚零花钱。
怀疑论者说我们除了成绩什么都不关心，从而忽略了性格的培养。
但是，他们又错了。
我们彼此关心，我们向往自由，我们珍惜公正，我们追求真理。
上个星期，很多我的同学去验血，为了给患血癌的孩子贡献自己的力量。
作为大学生，我们是处在人生分水岭的青年。