初中英语演讲幽默故事

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英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事(共8篇)

英语幽默小故事〔共8篇〕篇1:英语幽默小故事 Don't Pick Up the Money on the GroundAn economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.Why not?If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.Everything that can be invented has been invented.别捡地上的钱一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。

学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。

“为什么不捡?”“假设那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。

”“该创造的都已经被创造出来了。

”篇2:英语幽默小故事 The Less You Know, the More Money You MakeTheorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.Postulate 2: Time is Money.As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we haveKnowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.知识越少挣钱越多定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】演讲稿是作为在特定的情境中供口语表达使用的文稿。

随着社会不断地进步,演讲稿对我们的作用越来越大,如何写一份恰当的演讲稿呢?以下是小编帮大家整理的初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】,希望能够帮助到大家。

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】1Love Your Mother爱你的母亲Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈."Because I'm a woman," she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他."I don't understand," he said.我不明白.他回答His Mom just hugged him and said,"And you never will, but that's O.K.".......妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."Later the little boy asked his father,"Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?".后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?""All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的..The little boy grew up and became a man,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him,he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?"最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"GOD answered......上帝回答:"When I made woman,I decided she had to be special.I made her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,made her arms gentle enough to give comfort..."当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...I gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectionthat many times will comeeven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...I gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickneand fatigue withoutcomplaining....我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all yanjianggao/ircumstances. Even when her child has hurt her badly....She has the very special power to make a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的'时候...她用那特别的力量,让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰,也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧...I gave her strength to care for her husband, despite faultsand I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫,尽管他会犯错.我用男人的肋骨创造了女人,使女人可以保护男人的心脏...I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧,让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子,但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心.For all of this hard work,I also gave her a tear to shed.It is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....When you see her cry,tell her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe may still cry, you will have made her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难,我也同样赐她流下眼泪,这是当她在需要时可以使用的,这是她唯一的软弱之处...当你看到她哭泣的时候,告诉她你有多么地爱她,告诉她她为所有人所做的一切,即使这样她可能还是会哭泣,但你会使她的心里得到安慰.She is special!Please send this to women you know, and those with mothers,sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的!请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人,有母亲,姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人.But, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a woman is.Each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.但是,也把这个信息传递给男人,因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物.每一天,生活中都会有必须爬的山,但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松.Love your Mother Always永远爱你的母亲,and keep her Smiling并且使她微笑常在初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】2One of the most popular hobbies among people is readingbooks. More and more people spend their spare time in reading the books they are interested in.There are so many books in the world that it is impossible for any one to read all of them, even if he spends his whole life in reading. Before we start reading, we should find out whether it is valuable for us to read.Reading good books is one of the greatest pleasures in life. It can enrich our knowledge. It makes us learn lots of things we did not previously know. We can be aware of what had happened in the past as well as what is happening in the present time. The more books we read, the more knowledge we get. No matter how much education we receive or how much expensive we have, we can not become a full man unless we keep reading.Reading bad books will lead you to a wrong way and prevents you from progressing. It’s worse than reading nothing. So we know how important it is to read good books.book can be read at random time if you have leisure, and there never be a time limitation. Also, you can read a book to achieve a more really history. Through a book, you can communicate with its author without other’s transmission. All these rarely can be easily achieved by a television.Furthermore, book is a treasure that has developed centuries. As we know when written language appeared, human beings became use it to record their lives, and this action leaves us a lot of historic precious mineral. We can absorb intelligence and wisdom, and we can also be taught lessons. I love book from my heart, form book I know how to communicate with others, and I learn my homeland is the place I love best, and also I know my parents are the very inpiduals who I love through my life. What about the television? Television, sometimes, show violence, sex,drugs beyond our choice.初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】3Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he di dn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."。

幽默英文演讲稿范文5篇

幽默英文演讲稿范文5篇

幽默英文演讲稿范文5篇演讲稿可以用来交流思想和感情,表达主张和见解;也可以用来介绍自己的学习、工作情况和经验等,具有宣传、鼓动、教育和欣赏等作用。

下面是小编整理的幽默英文演讲稿,欢迎大家阅读分享借鉴。

幽默英文演讲稿1Good morning everybody, I’m very glad to stand here and give you a short speech. We all know that Bingxin has a famous saying “we always admire the beauty of flowers but its sprout was watered by tears of struggle and rained by blood of sacrifice”. So for the majority, behind their success, are filled of sweat and tears. Eagle flying in the vast firmament, must be experienced the pain of countless times fall under the cliff, then hammered out a pair of volley wings. A shinning of pearls, inevitably suffered countless body friction and numerous waves’ shock. In this view, a real successful people, and he must experienced numerous times to stand up again and agin after failed, because without sweat and tears on the life road ,no one can casually get the beautiful flowers. Alfter a heavy fall Shi Tiesheng lost his legs, it must be a heavy blow for anyone. But he didn't lose faith in life, but use his brain and hands to show the infinite love of life;Beethoven was blind and deaf, but he still had written the "Hero""Destiny"nd so on a large number of music works, in his unfortunately life, he doggedly gripped the "fate of the throat. They all had a fall, but they are strong enough to stand up, fight against fate and misfortune, finally they succeed. So for each of us, wrestling is not terrible, lose confidence and courage in life is the most terribe thing. In my opionion, the sweat and tears during the life’ journey are very important for us, they hone ourwill, and enrich our experience. As the saying goes, how can you see the rainbow without a rainy day, while you don't work hard and not struggle, how can you gain the successful flowers. All in all, the sweat and tears on the struggling road is inevitable, don’t look for shortcuts anymore, steadfast walk every step, we will succeed in the end. So belief yourself, nothing is impossile, just do it. Thank you for taking your time to listen to my speech, I hope in the near future we all can be successful.幽默英文演讲稿2The hours of a wise man are lengthened by his ideas as those of a fool are by his passions. The time of the one is long, because he does not know what to do with it; as is that of the other, because he distinguishes every moment of it with useful or amusing thoughts, or in other words, because the one is always wishing it away, and the other always enjoying it.How different is the view of past life, in the man who is grown old in knowledge and wisdom, from that of him who is grown in ignorance and folly? The latter is like the owner of a barren country, that fills his eye with the [1] prospect of naked hills and plains, which produce nothing either profitable or [2] ornamental; the other [3] beholds a beautiful and spacious landscape, divided into delightful gardens, green meadows, fruitful fields, and can scarce [4] cast his eye upon a single spot of his possessions, that is not covered with some beautiful plant or flower.幽默英文演讲稿3Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane."Fun flights!" the notice said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said, "I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane lan ded, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."幽默英文演讲稿4There is a wonderful word which expresses the most original motions and desires among human-beings. With solving any kind of imperfections, our world has moved ahead. This is the word “innovation” that we cannot afford to lose.We chicaned every detail of the innovation. Thousands years before, we created fire when we took a stone to knock anotherone. Since Han Dynasty, four great inventions had been created and it is one of the greatest signs that China become to the ancient civilized country. And nowadays, thousands of software, products, architectures and public facilities have upgraded more than that about 100 years ago. So how did these happen? What will you do if you are not satisfied with your tools anymore? What will you do if old mode cannot afford to develop in a company? There is no doubt that we should innovate no matter where we are and what we do. Not because of the design itself, but actually for its intended purpose.If there was no Apple, everyone could not imagine how to contact others easily and enjoy a better Internet surfing.If there was no Microsoft, perhaps we still worked in a dim office and duplicate some troublesome documents. If there was no Newton, and no theory of gravity, maybe I will win the Nobel Prize like Newton rather than just standing here. I have heard that three apple changed the world. The first one seduced Eve. The second one awakened Newton. The third one was in the hands of Steve Jobs. We sort of think the innovation of the world began with apple. I imagine lots of people want to become another Newton or Jobs right now with just one hand to change the world, right? Have the innovation to follow your heart. It somehow already reflects what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.Via questioning, we can start to innovate. Via innovating, we can start to create better lives. No innovation, no improvement. No improvement, no success. And no success, no civilization. Now, our time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life! Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice! Don't let yourself down! It is the innovation that wecannot afford to lose!幽默英文演讲稿5Good morning teachers and fellow students. Today we would like to introduce a few favorite books to you.My favorite book is (Italian: Cuore). This is a diary written by an Italian boy Enrico. The diary is about his life and study. It included various touching stories that happened around Enrico, the mottos taught by his parents, as well as the wonderful ten "monthly" stories told by his teacher during the class. Every word in the chapter describes the word "love". From patriotism to friendship, and to the love between parents and child -- really touching.This novel taught me how to love, and how to learn from love.I really like this book very much. How about you? What is your favorite book?My favorite book is . Have you read it before?Oh, I haven’t read this book before. What is it about?Well, it is a story of a rich girl who maintained her noble character after the bankruptcy of her father. The story is happy ending.Can you tell us why you love this book so much?Sure. It is because the story taught us to be brave and to face the challenges and difficulties with courage. I am deeply impressed by the strength and perseverance of the little princess in the story. I have decided to learn from her from now on.Oh I see, the story sounds very good. I cannot wait to read this book as well.。

幽默英语讲话稿(精选多篇)

幽默英语讲话稿(精选多篇)

幽默英语演讲稿(精选多篇)第一篇:幽默英语演讲稿loveyourmother爱你的母亲whyareyoucrying,ayoungboyaskedhismom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈."becausei'mawoman,"shetoldhim.因为我是女人,她告诉他."idon'tunderstand,"hesaid.我不明白.他回答hismomjusthuggedhimandsaid,"andyouneverwill,butthat'so.k.".......妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."laterthelittleboyaskedhisfather,"whydoesmomseemtocryfornoreason?".后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?""allwomencryfornoreason,"wasallhisdadcouldsay......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...thelittleboygrewupandbecameaman,stillwonderingwhywomencry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finallyheputinacalltogodandwhengodgotbacktohim,heasked"go d,whydowomencrysoeasily?"最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"godanswered......上帝回答:"whenimadewoman,idecidedshehadtobespecial.imadehershouldersstrongenoughtocarrytheweightoftheworld,yet,madeherarmsgentleenoughtogivecomfort..."当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承担整个世界,但是,却让她的双臂温柔的足够去安慰他人...igavehertheinnerstrengthtoendurechildbirthandtherejectionthatmanytimeswillcomeevenfromherownchildren.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛,也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会来自于自己的孩子...igaveherahardnessthatallowshertokeepgoingandtakecareofherfamilyandfriends,evenwheneveryoneelsegivesup,throughsicknessandfatiguewith outcomplaining....我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...igaveherthesensitivitytoloveherchildrenunderanyandallcirc umstances.evenwhenherchildhashurtherbadly....shehastheveryspecialpowertomakeachild'sboo-boofeelbetterandtoquellateenager'sanxietiesandfears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候...她用那特别的力量,让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到安慰,也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧...igaveherstrengthtocareforherhusband,despitefaultsandifashionedherfromhisribtoprotecthisheart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫,尽管他会犯错.我用男人的肋骨创造了女人,使女人可以保护男人的心脏...igaveherwisdomtoknowthatagoodhusbandneverhurtshiswife,but sometimestestsherstrengthsandherresolvetostandbesidehimunfalt eringly....我给她智慧,让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子,但有时候会试炼她坚定的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心.forallofthishardwork,ialsogaveherateartoshed.itisherstousewheneverneededanditisheronlyweakness....whenyouseehercry,tellherhowmuchyouloveher,andallshedoesforeveryone,andeven thoughshemaystillcry,youwillhavemadeherheartfeelgood.因为这些种种的困难,我也同样赐她流下眼泪,这是当她在需要时可以使用的,这是她唯一的软弱之处...当你看到她哭泣的时候,告诉她你有多么地爱她,告诉她她为所有人所做的一切,即使这样她可能还是会哭泣,但你会使她的心里得到安慰.sheisspecial!pleasesendthistowomenyouknow,andthosewithmothers,sisters,andspecialwomenintheirlives.她是独特的!请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人,有母亲,姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人.but,alsosendthistomensotheywillunderstandaboutwhatawonder fulthingawomanis.eachdayisamountainthatmustbeclimbed;withcourageeachstepge tseasier.但是,也把这个信息传递给男人,因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物.每一天,生活中都会有必须爬的山,但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松.loveyourmotheralways永远爱你的母亲,andkeephersmiling并且使她微笑常在第二篇:新初中幽默英语演讲稿新初中幽默英语演讲稿loveyourmother爱你的母亲whyareyoucrying,ayoungboyaskedhismom?你为什么哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈."becausei'mawoman,"shetoldhim.因为我是女人,她告诉他."idon'tunderstand,"hesaid.我不明白.他回答hismomjusthuggedhimandsaid,"andyouneverwill,butthat'so.k.".......妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."laterthelittleboyaskedhisfather,"whydoesmomseemtocryfornoreason?".后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈为什么似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?""allwomencryfornoreason,"wasallhisdadcouldsay......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...thelittleboygrewupandbecameaman,stillwonderingwhywomencry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈为什么哭.finallyheputinacalltogodandwhengodgotbacktohim,heasked"go d,whydowomencrysoeasily?"最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝,为什么女人容易哭泣?"godanswered......上帝回答:"whenimadewoman,idecidedshehadtobespecial.imadehershouldersstrongenoughtocarrytheweightoftheworld,yet,madeherarmsgentleenoughtogivecomfort..."当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,第三篇:七年级五班英语幽默故事大赛演讲稿七年级五班英语幽默故事大赛演讲稿doyoulikestories?iwanttotellyouatruestory.ithappenedtoafriendofmineayearago.whilemyfriend,george,wasreadinginbed,twothievesclimbedint ohiskitchen.aftertheyhadenteredthehouse,theywentintothediningroom.itwasverydark,sotheyturnedonatorch.suddenly,theyheardavoicebeh indthem.‘what’sup?what’sup?’someonecalled.thethievesdroppedthetorchandranawayasquicklyastheycould.georgeheardthenoiseandcamedownstairsquickly.heturnedonthelight,buthecouldn’tseeanyone.thethieveshadalreadygone.butgeorge’sparrot,henry,wasstillthere.‘what’sup,george ?’hecalled.‘nothing,henry.’georgesaidandsmiled.‘gobacktosleep.’第四篇:幽默英语英语幽默对话buyyouadrink?(我可以为你买一杯饮料吗?)女:actuallyi'dratherhavethemoney.(不必,我我宁愿留下那些钱.) 经典对话二:男:canihaveyourname?(直译:我能有你的名字吗?)女:why?don'tyoualreadyhaveone?(为什么?你不是已经有一个了吗?)经典对话三:男:i'maphotographer.i'vebeenlookingforafacelikeyours.(我是摄影师。

三分钟英语有趣小故事演讲(优秀3篇)

三分钟英语有趣小故事演讲(优秀3篇)

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英语演讲稿1分钟幽默(范本)

英语演讲稿1分钟幽默(范本)

英语演讲稿1分钟幽默‎英语演讲稿1分钟幽‎默此时此刻,我站在‎这里想象着观众都是裸‎体,真的起作用,我不‎再紧张了,但眼睛有‎些疲劳。

i use‎d to get n‎e rvous hen‎giving a ‎s peeh but ‎t hen i rea‎d that it ‎h elps to t‎h ink of th‎e entire a‎u diene as ‎b eing nake‎d. and so,‎at this v‎e r moment,‎i’m stand‎i ng up her‎e imaginin‎g ever one‎in this a‎u diene as ‎b eing nake‎d. and it ‎r eall orks‎. i no suf‎f er from n‎e rvousness‎. eestrain‎. es幽默注释:‎把观众想象成裸‎体,意思是我不怕你们‎,就不紧张了。

创新句‎子:大部分人‎站在讲台上都会有点儿‎紧张,我属于少部分人‎,我非常紧张。

我‎本人不自负——我简直‎不能告诉你们我是多么‎钦佩我这一点。

p‎e rsonall, ‎i have nev‎e r been on‎e ited --- ‎a nd i an’t‎tell ou h‎o muh i ad‎m ire mself‎for that.‎幽默句子:‎他因为自己不自负,所‎以变得非常骄傲。

创新‎句子:我一点‎儿都不自负,我希望别‎人也这么看我.我先用‎简单明了的英语演讲,‎以后我再翻译给律师听‎。

let me p‎u t this in‎t o plaine‎n glish. i’‎l l transla‎t e it for ‎t he laers ‎l ater. 幽默注‎释:律师总喜‎欢用复杂的语言,简单‎的话都听不懂了。

‎创新句子:我‎的讲话有三个版本,小‎学生版本,中学生版本‎,大学生版本,你是听‎小学一年纪版的,还‎是小学二年纪版的?如‎果你听过这个故事,请‎不要打断我,我就知道‎这一个故事。

初中英语搞笑脱口秀稿子

初中英语搞笑脱口秀稿子

初中英语搞笑脱口秀稿子I remember back in my middle school days how much I loved watching funny stand-up comedy shows. They never failed to make me laugh and brighten up my day. The comedians would share hilarious stories and crack jokes that had the entire audience in stitches.我还记得在初中的时候我有多么喜欢看搞笑脱口秀节目。

它们总是能让我笑个不停,让我的一天变得更加愉快。

那些喜剧演员会分享一些令人捧腹大笑的故事,讲些笑话,整个观众都笑得前仰后合。

One of my favorite comedy routines was about a clumsy student who always seemed to get into the most ridiculous situations. The way the comedian acted out the scenes had everyone doubled over with laughter. It was pure comedic gold.我最喜欢的喜剧节目之一是关于一个总是陷入荒唐局面的笨拙学生。

喜剧演员表演场景的方式让每个人都笑得前仰后合。

那简直就是纯粹的喜剧之金。

Another hilarious skit involved a teacher who was always trying to impress his students with his quirky sense of humor. He would tellthe corniest jokes and puns, but somehow his charm and enthusiasm made them absolutely hysterical. It was a masterclass in comedic timing.另一个滑稽的短剧涉及一个老师,他总是试图用他古怪的幽默感给学生留下印象。

英文笑话演讲带翻译

英文笑话演讲带翻译

英文笑话演讲带翻译Title: A Funny Speech in English with Translation。

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Today, I want to share some funny jokes with you. I hope they can bring some laughter to your day.First, let me tell you a story. One day, a man went to a barber shop to get a haircut. After the haircut, the barber asked the man if he wanted some aftershave. The man replied, "No, thanks. My wife doesn't like the smell of alcohol." The barber then asked, "How about some hair tonic?" The man replied, "No, thanks. My wife doesn't like the smell of chemicals." The barber was puzzled and asked, "Then what does your wife like?" The man replied, "Shelikes money."笑话翻译,晚上好,女士们先生们。

今天,我想和大家分享一些有趣的笑话。

我希望它们能给您带来一些欢笑。

首先,让我给您讲一个故事。

一天,一个男人去理发店理发。

理完发后,理发师问男人是否需要一些须后水。

英语演讲幽默范文初中通用15篇

英语演讲幽默范文初中通用15篇

英语演讲幽默范文初中通用15篇英语演讲幽默范文初中第一篇Dick wearing a pair of new trousers went together with his father to his aunt's the sight of the boy's new trousers,his aunt admired very much and kissed him front of the boy, there were many nice cakes and cousin also took out all his toys and played with boy enjoyed a good day there.While he went back home with his father, he was so joyful that he sang and danced along the way home. suddenly he slipped and fell into the mud and his trousers got very dirty.When he got home, his mother saw his dirty trousers and said:Oh,what a mess! This is not the first time you come home likethat , and this time you are wearing your new trousers!I am sorry,mum,said Dick.But I had no time to take my new trousers off when I fell down.英语演讲幽默范文初中第二篇Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold mytopic is about choice and research shows that a man has to make 73choices one so many choices one day, people easily get so confused andafraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true partof life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than thechoice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life,which the process makes the difference. Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gumpmade no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with hisstrong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudesand feelings ,the caution, courageand persistance we have as we encounter newexperience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed mymajor when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closely related tomathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief thatthis is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,Ipersisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my I could understand some parts and even found , I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,thechoice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the pastfour months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.No matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, yourpotential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress willcome to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can yousee make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong forme to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain and enjoy this fantasticexperience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy theprocess. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after youchose to come here.Thank you!英语演讲幽默范文初中第三篇Mary was an English girl, but she lived in Rome. She was six years old. Last year her mother said to her, “You’re six years old now, Mary, and you’re going to begin going to a school here. You’re going to like it very much, because it’s a nice school.”“Is it an English school” Mary asked.” Yes, it is,” her mother said. Mary went to the school, and enjoyed her lessons. Hermother always took her to school in the morning and brought her home in the afternoon. Last Monday her mother went to the school at 4o’clock, and Mary ran out of her class. “We’ve got a new girl in our class today, Mummy,” she said. “She’s six years old too, and she’s very nice, but she isn’t English. She’s German.” “Does she speak English” Mary’s mother asked.” No, but she laughs in English,” Mary said happily.英语演讲幽默范文初中第四篇Dear teachers and schoolmates:I’m very happy to give a lecture in English here tod ay. Thetitle of speechis I Love English. As everyone knows,English is very important has beenused everywhere in the has become the most common language on Internetand for international trade. If we can speak English well,we will have morechance to more and more people have taken notice of it,thenumber of the people who go to learn English has increased at a high speed. Butfor myself,I learn English not only because of its importance and itsusefulness,but also because of my love for I learn English, I can feel adifferent way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the Iread English novels,I canfeel the pleasure from the book which is differentfrom reading the I speak English, I can feel the confident frommy I write English,I can see the beauty which is not the same as ourChinese… I loveEnglish,it gives me a colorful hope I can travel aroundthe world one day. With my good English, I can make friends with many peoplefrom different can see many places of great dream that Ican go to London,because it is the birth place of English. I also want to use mygood English to introduce our great places to the English spoken people,I hopethat they can love our country like us.I know, Rome was not built in a day. I believe that after continuous hardstudy, one day I can speak English very well. If you want to be loved, youshould learn to love and be lovable. So I believe as I love English everyday ,it will love me too. I am sure that I will realize my dream one day! Thankyou!英语演讲幽默范文初中第五篇Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town.Let’s go to the fair, Matt, his wife said. We haven’t been anywhere for a long time.Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything.They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things M att’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.Fun flights! the notice said, $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flig ht. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well.I’ve only got $$ 10, he told the pilot. Can my wife come with me for free? The pilot wasn’t selling many tickets, so he said,I’ll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight.Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things.At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, 0. K. your wife didn’t make a sound. She can have her ride free.Thank you, Matt said. It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out.英语演讲幽默范文初中第六篇Earn english not only because of its importance and its usefulness,but also because of my love for i learn english, i can feel a different way of thinking which gives me more room to touch the i read english novels,i can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading the i speak english, i can feel the confident from my i write english,i can see the beauty which is not the same as our chinese...I love english,it gives me a colorful hope i can travel around the world one day. with my good english, i can make friends with many people from different can see many places of great dream that i can go to london,because it is the birth place of english.I also want to use my good english to introduce our great places to the english spoken people,i hope that they can love our country like us.I know, rome was not built in a day. i believe that after continuous hard study, one day i can speak english very well. if you want to be loved, you should learn to love and be lovable. so i believe as i love english everyday , it will love me too.I am sure that i will realize my dream one day!Thank you!英语演讲幽默范文初中第七篇Ladies and Gentlemen , Good afternoon! I68m very glad to standhere andgive you a short speech. today my topic is “youth”. I hope you will like it ,and found the importance in your youth so that more cherish it.First I want to ask you some questions: 1、 Do you know what is youth? 2、How do you master your youth?YouthYouth is not a time of life, it is a state of mind it is not rosy cheeks ,red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the emotions :it is the freshnessit is the freshness of the deep springs of life . Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of theappetite , for adventure over the love of ease. This often exists in a man of 60more than a boy of 20 . Nobody grows old merely by a number of years . We growold by deserting our ideals.Years wrinkle the skin , but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul .Worry , fear , self –distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.Whether 60 of 16 , there is in every human being 67s heart the lure ofwonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what68s next and the joy of thegame of living . In the center of your heart and my heart there68s a wirelessstation : so long as it receives messages of beauty , hope ,cheer, courage andpower from men and from theinfinite, so long as you are young .When the aerials are down , and your spirit is covered with snows ofcynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old ,even at 20 , but aslong as your aerials are up ,to catch waves of optimism , there is hope you maydie young at 80.That68s all ! Thank you!英语演讲幽默范文初中第八篇The hours of a wise man are lengthened by his ideas as those of a fool are by his passions. The time of the one is long, because he does not know what to do with it; as is that of the other, because he distinguishes every moment of it with useful or amusing thoughts, or in other words, because the one is always wishing it away, and the other always enjoying it.How different is the view of past life, in the man who is grown old in knowledge and wisdom, from that of him who is grown in ignorance and folly? The latter is like the owner of a barren country, that fills his eye with the [1] prospect of naked hills and plains, which produce nothing either profitable or [2] ornamental; the other [3] beholds a beautiful and spacious landscape, dividedinto delightful gardens, green meadows, fruitful fields, and can scarce [4] cast his eye upon a single spot of his possessions, thatis not covered with some beautiful plant or flower.英语演讲幽默范文初中第九篇Good morning/afternoon!First thing first, I gotta say,wow,its funny thing to be given a chancelike be told,I really got a little bit nervous before I stand righthere ,so called stage you look specifically on me .You may find myhands shaking,pretty assembles the guy who suffered from Pakinsons disease,andlegs wobbling ,like I caught so-called ball leg. Okay,lets stop going around thebush and get back to my topic really like to talk a funny story I havejust heard.A lady called Lucy emigrated to United States several years spokenEnglish is not that fluent .And one day,she is just sitting on the couch withhis friends Mandy watching Sit-Com.A noise of bump had the attention of Mandy,which led her to goout of thehouse trying to figure out what had you imagine that Mandy gostraight out with merely a Lucy shouted at her,Lucy ,turn yourclothes on. What suprised her most,beyond her wildest imagination, is thatalmost all the male in this country took their head out of made a mistake here .The word spitted means Mandy is totally naked to the reason that malelooked out of the right sentence shall be,put your clothingon.Thestory inspires you to take a careful look on the vastdifference between easternand western culture.Thats full of it,thank you for your time!英语演讲幽默范文初中第十篇Good evening ,Ladies and Gentlemen:Thank you very much for choosing to come in such a cold my topic is about choice and research shows that a man has to make 73 choices one so many choices one day, people easily get so confused andafraid of making wrong choice that they hesitate and finally miss the true part of life. In my opinion, the following part is of much more importance than the choice. There is no absolute right or wrong choice but wonderful or boring life, which the process makes the difference.Life is a box of chocolate,you never know what you will get. Forrest Gump made no decision by and for himself but he accomplished great success with his strong will in the process. The process is not the road itself but the attitudes and feelings ,the caution, courage and persistance we have as we encounter new experience and unexpected obstacles. Take myself as an example, I changed my major when I became a postgraduate. After the choice,days have been harsh for cannot understand the new lessons at all. For they are closelyrelated to mathmatics which I learned nothing about before. However wuth the belief that this is the great chance for me to experience new ideas and challenge myself,I persisted. I asked for help from every channel and reorgonized my life. Gradually I could understand some parts and even found maths , I learned to act instead of complaining. In retrospect,the choice left no trace in my mind but the happiness and bitterness of the past four months becomes an unforgetable experience in my life.NO matter what the choice is, enjoy the process. In the process, your potential will be inspired and new discoveries,improvement and progress will come to you. These are the most beautiful sceneries and only on the way can you see make your life colorful.There is no need and I donnot want to judge whether it right or wrong for me to be here,but I congratulate to myself for I gain and enjoy this fantastic experience. So my dear friends,never worry about your choice and enjoy the process. I am sure you will get something new and intersting tonight after you chose to come here.Thank you!英语演讲幽默范文初中第十一篇i am flying today, speech is the ideal wing, as a middle school student, we are in love fantasy, love to dream, love highlight their personality, love and zhang yang us different, we were not mistaken, we now are not qualitatively period of development, there is no one standard for us to judge their own life and values. we always let adults know that we can do it yourself to live, you can solve their own problems, but we have some dependence. love day dreaming, perhaps today we want to be a teacher, to educate our newcomers, and perhaps tomorrow we want to be a scientist to explore our humanity to thepresent do not know some of the mystery, or we have no way to explain some phenomena ...we are willing to bury the reality of the cruelty and injustice, we are our parents, our elders could not understand some of the practice of life, we do not understand why they like to do ah. it is our wish too much too young to bury social experience. attitude of life when we are not deep.down we love fantasy, love to dream of behavior, we need to do one for the people and human progremake a difference. to our actions to prove that we have!英语演讲幽默范文初中第十二篇One of the most popular hobbies among people is reading books. More and more people spend their spare time in reading the books they are interested in.There are so many books in the world that it is impossible for any one to read all of them, even if he spends his whole life in reading. Before we start reading, we should find out whether it is valuable for us to read.Reading good books is one of the greatest pleasures in life. It can enrich our knowledge. It makes us learn lots of things we did not previously know. We can be aware of what had happened in the past as well as what is happening in the present time. The more books we read, the more knowledge we get. No matter how much education we receive or how much expensive we have, we can not become a full man unless we keep reading.Reading bad books will lead you to a wrong way and prevents you from progressing. It’s worse than reading nothing. So we know how important it is to read good books.book can be read at random time if you have leisure, and there never be a time limitation. Also, you can read a book to achieve a more really history. Through a book, you can communicate with its author without other’s transmission. All these rarely can be easily achieved by a television.Furthermore, book is a treasure that has developed centuries. As we know when written language appeared, human beings became use it to record their lives, and this action leaves us a lot of historic precious mineral. We can absorb intelligence and wisdom, and we can also be taught lessons. I love book from my heart, form book I know how to communicate with others, and I learn my homeland is the place I love best, and also I know my parents are the very individuals who I love through my life. What about the television? Television, sometimes, show violence, sex, drugs beyond our choice.英语演讲幽默范文初中第十三篇Good morning teachers and fellow students. Today we would like to introduce a few favorite books to you.My favorite book is (Italian: Cuore). This is a diary written by an Italian boy Enrico. The diary is about his life and study. It included various touching stories that happened around Enrico, the mottos taught by his parents, as well as the wonderful ten monthly stories told by his teacher during the class. Every word in the chapter describes the word love. From patriotism to friendship, and to the love between parents and child -- really touching.This novel taught me how to love, and how to learn from love. I really like this book very much. How about you? What is your favorite book?My favorite book is . Have you read it before?Oh, I haven’t read this book before. What is it about?Well, it is a story of a rich girl who maintained her noble character after the bankruptcy of her father. The story is happy ending.Can you tell us why you love this book so much?Sure. It is because the story taught us to be brave and to face the challenges and difficulties with courage. I am deeply impressed by the strength and perseverance of the little princein the story. I have decided to learn from her from now on.Oh I see, the story sounds very good. I cannot wait to read this book as well.英语演讲幽默范文初中第十四篇As we all know, Failure is the mother of success. But few people canreally understand what the saying means. In the world, I am sure that no onedare say he hasn't met any trouble all his life. So we must face failure. Infact, failure is not fearful, but important thing is how to face it correctly.Facing failure, people will never take their fate lying will try theirbest to work harder and harder until at last they succeed.Not being courageous to face setbacks, people have no chance to enjoy thepleasure of success. So they have nothing to do but feel sad and empty all dayand all night. In fact, they lose the chance of succethemselves.My friend,whenever in trouble, please remember, Failure is the mother of success.you can do it !you could be the one!whatevertrouble you met how terribleit was,you just think that all will beall right,there is no things isimportance in the believe you often complain of theterrible thigs you suffe in the trouble,so you can nothappy and have a your life's golf will be not life won't must have the surely mind,and do it by the plan .nobody dontlike confident people,the most importance point is you have it,everything you do it will be succeful!英语幽默11-12英语演讲幽默范文初中第十五篇Earn english not only because of its importance and its usefulness,but alsobecause of my love for i learn english, i canfeel a different way ofthinking which gives me more room to touch the i read englishnovels,i can feel the pleasure from the book which is different from reading i speak english, i can feel the confidentfrom my iwrite english,i can see the beauty which is not the same as our chinese...I love english,it gives me a colorful hope i can travel around theworld one day. with my good english, i can make friends with many people fromdifferent can see many places of great dream that i can goto london,because it is the birth place of english.I also want to use my good english to introduce our great places to theenglish spoken people,i hope that they can love our countrylike us.I know, rome was not built in a day. i believe that after continuous hardstudy, one day i can speak english very well. if you want to be loved, youshould learn to love and be lovable. so ibelieve as i love english everyday ,it will love me too.I am sure that i will realize my dream one day!Thank you!。

初一英语演讲故事13篇

初一英语演讲故事13篇

初一英语演讲故事13篇初一英语演讲故事1 the cats from the cat village went to the river for a picnic.来自猫村庄的猫去河边野餐。

a cat found a corn stalk.一只猫发现了一根玉米杆。

what can the cats do with the corn stalk?猫会如何处置这根玉米杆呢?he must be hungry.he is eating the kernels of corn.他一定饿了。

他正在吃玉米粒。

oh,look!he stopped eating.噢,瞧!他停止吃了。

meow made a new tooth from a kernel of corn!猫咪新咬了一排牙印在玉米粒上!this cat ate the ear of corn.这只猫吃掉了玉米穗。

he made a harmonica out of the corncob.他把玉米棒子弄得象口琴一样。

oh,look!the cats are brushing their teeth with the harmonica.”chi-ka,chi-ka.”up and down,up and down.噢,瞧!猫咪们正在用口琴刷牙。

that’s right.teeth have to be cleaned after eating.good cat!“奇-卡,奇-卡。

”上下,上下。

the cats are thinking of something.they are full and have brushed their teeth.now it’s time to play.what game can they play with the corn?对了。

在吃东西以后,牙齿必须被清洁。

好猫咪!first,this cat is making a net with corn silks.猫咪们正在想一些事情。

英语演讲稿 A funny story(一个搞笑的故事)

英语演讲稿 A funny story(一个搞笑的故事)

英语演讲稿 A funny story(一个搞笑的故事)Hello everyone! My name is Monica. I’m studying at Guangzhou Huamei International School. I like reading very much. I’ve read a lot of books until now. Today I’m going to tell you a story: It’s about a handsome boy named Larry who likes helping people.One day, he saw a plastic bag in the lobby of his block. It was full of dog food.“Whose bag is this?”Larry thought. ”Mrs Lee has dog, perhaps it’s hers”.Larry took the bag upstairs to Mrs Lee’s flat. He asked Mrs Lee if the bag was hers. She said no. So he went to Mr and Mrs Wong’s flat. He asked them about the bag. Mr and Mrs Wong said it wasn’t their’s. So asked three more families, but he still couldn’t find the owner of the bag.Finally he went back to the lobby, and he saw Mrs Kong and her son, Joe standing there.“That funny”Mrs Kong said to Joe. ”The bag was too heavy so I left it here and went upstairs to call you. Where is it now?”“Is this bag yours, Mrs Kong ?”said Larry .1————来源网络整理,仅供供参考“Thank you. That’s very kind of you .”said Mrs Kong.“Let’s carry it together.”Said Joe. And he found the owner of the bag in the end.Larry was tired that evening. He told his mother about the bag.“Well done! You’re very helpful, Larry. But sometimes you’re too helpful!”That’s all! Thank you for your listening.————来源网络整理,仅供供参考 2。

英语演讲小故事3篇

英语演讲小故事3篇

英语演讲小故事3篇英语演讲小故事篇(1):英语演讲稿 A funny story(一个搞笑的故事)Hello everyone! My name is Monica. I’m studying at Guangzhou Huamei International School. I like reading very much. I’ve read a lot of books until now. Today I’m going to tell you a story: It’s about a handsome boy named Larry who likes helping people.One day, he saw a plastic bag in the lobby of his block. It was full of dog food.“Whose bag is this” Larry thought. ”Mrs Lee has dog, perhapsit’s hers”.Larry took the bag upstairs to Mrs Lee’s flat. He asked Mrs Lee if the bag was her s. She said no. So he went to Mr and Mrs Wong’s flat. He asked them about the bag. Mr and Mrs Wong said it wasn’ttheir’s. So asked three more families, but he still couldn’t find the owner of the bag.Finally he went back to the lobby, and he saw Mrs Kong and her son, Joe standing there.“That funny” Mrs Kong said to Joe. ”The bag was too heavy so I left it here and went upstairs to call you. Where is it now”“Is this bag yours, Mrs Kong ” said Larry .“Thank you. That’s very kind of you .” said Mrs Kong.“Let’s carry it together.” Said Joe. And he found the owner of the bag in the end.Larry was tired that evening. He told his mother about the bag.“Well done! You’re very helpful, Larry. But sometimes you’re too helpful!”That’s all! Thank you for your listening.英语演讲小故事篇(2):小学生写事作文600字一次难忘的演讲暑假第一天,妈妈就带着我听了一场李阳老师的演讲,这也是我听过的一次最难忘的演讲。

初一英语幽默故事三分钟演讲稿范文

初一英语幽默故事三分钟演讲稿范文

初一英语幽默故事三分钟演讲稿范文演讲稿像议论文一样论点鲜明、逻辑性强、富有特点,但它又不是一般的议论文。

它是一种带有宣传性和鼓动性的应用文体,经常使用各种修辞手法和艺术手法,具有较强的感染力。

一起来看看初一英语幽默故事三分钟演讲稿,欢迎查阅!初一英语演讲稿1Everyone is attracted by beauty and beauty is powerful. But what is true beauty? Perhaps you can get the answer from the following story.This morning I went to the market to buy some vegetables with my parents. On the way we all highly praised a young man in western-style clothes and leather shoes who was riding by. But he rode so fast that he knocked an old lady down carelessly.Instead of stopping, he pretended not to see this and rode away quickly. We were all very angry with the young man. To our happiness, a girl in plain dress ran forward at once, helped the lady up and took her home. We all praised the girl.From this we know we cannot judge a person by his appearance. A person who is dressed beautifully may not have a beautiful soul.who has a beautiful soul is really beautiful.初一英语演讲稿2most people would like to be popular with others, but not everyone can achieve this goal. what is the secret to popularity? in fact, it is very simple. the first step is to improve our appearance. we should always make sure that we stay in good shape and dress well.when we are healthy and well-groomed, we will not only look better but also feel better. in addition, we should smile andappear friendly. after all, our facial expression is an important part of our appearance. if we can do this, people will be attracted to our good looks and impressed by our confidence.another important step is developing more consideration for others. we should always put others first and place their interests before our own. its also important to be good listeners; in this way people will feel comfortable enough to confide in us. however, no matter what we do, we must not gossip.above all, we must remember to be ourselves, not phonies. only by being sincere and respectful of others can we earn their respect. if we can do all of the above, i am sure popularity will come our way.初一英语演讲稿3Hi everybody.I am so glad to give my speech to you here.Now I will start my topic about The Dream English,as you know ,The Dream English plans to put our dream come true。

英语演讲幽默故事

英语演讲幽默故事

七年级五班英语幽默故事大赛演讲稿do you like stories?i want to tell you a true story.it happened to a friend of mine a year ago.while my friend ,george, was reading in bed, two thieves climbed into his kitchen. after they had entered the house,they went into the dining room.it was very dark,so they turned on a torch.suddenly, they heard a voice behind them. ‘what’s up? what’s up?’someone called. the thieves dropped the torchand ran away as quickly as they could.george heard the noiseand came downstairs quickly.he turned on the light,but he couldn’t see anyone.the thieves had already gone.but george’s parrot, hey, was still there. ‘what’s up, george?’he called.‘nothing, hey.’george said and smiled. ‘go back to sleep.’篇二:初中英语演讲幽默故事bighead“wheres the shopping bag?”“i havent got one,use your hat.”大脑袋“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑,”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说:“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。

简短搞笑英文演讲稿带翻译

简短搞笑英文演讲稿带翻译
三. 语言双关和言语游戏
1. 时光如箭
你有没有听说过时光如箭的笑话?那不仅仅是一个笑话,它还是一个双关语。短语“时光如箭”可以有两种解释。它可能意味着时间过得很快,就像箭一样迅速穿过空气。然而,它也可以被理解为“时间,这只昆虫,喜欢投掷箭。”这种言语游戏为简单的短语增添了额外的幽默层次,让它变得更加有趣。
二. 有趣的故事和笑话
1. 魔镜
从前,一个人走进一家酒吧,看到一个又高又壮的男人坐在镜子前,对镜子说道:“你很强壮,你是个好战士,每个人都爱你。”被这个情景吸引的这个人向酒保询问了关于这面镜子的情况。酒保回答说:“那是一面魔镜,它非常适合提升一个人的自信。”于是,这个人决定试试看。他站在镜子前,说:“我是一个成功的商人,我很有吸引力。”接下来发生的事情是,他在工作上得到了晋升,开始得到更多异性的关注。原来,这面镜子反映的是一个人最需要听到的东西。
大家好,很高兴今天能站在这里和大家分享一些搞笑有趣的英语演讲。笑声是最好的良药,我相信幽默可以拉近我们的距离,让我们的生活更加开心。所以,让我们来到幽默和快乐的世界吧!
I. The Power of Laughter
1. Laughter is Contagious
Have you ever noticed that when someone starts laughing, it's hard not to join in? Laughter is contagious, and it has the incredible power to bring people together. Just a simple joke or funny story can break the ice and create a sense of unity among people. When we laugh together, we bond and form connections that can last a lifetime.

英语故事演讲稿(共7篇)

英语故事演讲稿(共7篇)

英语故事演讲稿〔共7篇〕第1篇:英语故事演讲稿英语故事演讲稿英语故事演讲稿-英语故事演讲稿Two dogstheir parent两只狗有一个人养了两条狗:一条是猎犬,一条是看家狗。

英语故事演讲稿他训练猎狗帮他打猎,教看家狗守家。

当猎人打了一天猎回家后,总要分给看家狗一些肉,猎狗对此很生气。

它不快乐地对看家狗说道:“我在外边追捕猎物非常辛苦,而你在家什么都不做,但你却分享我的食物。

”看家狗答复道:“不要责怪我,我的朋友。

你应该去责备主人。

他不教我打猎,却只教我分享别人的食物。

” 不要因为父母的错误而去责备孩子。

One day, a monkey rides his bike near theriver.This time he sees a lion under a tree.The lion runs at him.He is afraid and falls into the river.He can’t swim.He shouts.The rabbit hears him.He jumpsinto the river.The rabbit swims to the monkey, but he can’t help him.三个好朋友一天,一只猴子在河边骑车。

这时他看见树下有一只狮子,狮子向他跑来。

他非常的害怕,掉进河里。

他不会游泳,大叫起来。

兔子听见了,跳进水里,但他却没有方法救猴子。

幸运的是,一只大象过来了。

大象非常强壮,救出了兔子和猴子。

他们来到大象的家,在那里吃了一顿大餐。

从此他们成了好朋友。

找朋友塞姆是一条小鱼,他在海里。

他生在海里。

他很孤独,想要找一个朋友,那个朋友看起来要想他。

塞姆看见一条墨鱼。

墨鱼有8条腿,看上去不像塞姆。

因此塞姆游走了。

塞姆遇见一条鲨鱼。

他想跟鲨鱼问好。

鲨鱼张开大嘴,塞姆有迅速地逃走了。

英语故事演讲稿塞姆又累又饿,他要休息一会儿。

这时他看见一条圆鱼,圆鱼对他说:“你好!你愿意做我的朋友吗?”塞姆答复:“好哇!可你是圆形的,我是扁的。

幽默英语故事演讲稿大全_演讲稿

幽默英语故事演讲稿大全_演讲稿

幽默英语故事演讲稿大全_演讲稿很高兴能和大家分享一些幽默的英语故事。

我相信笑声是世界上最美好的声音之一,所以我希望通过这些故事给大家带来快乐和轻松的氛围。

英文回答:Let me start with a funny story about a man who went to see a doctor. The man said to the doctor, "Doctor, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes." The doctor replied, "Have you seen an ophthalmologist?" The man said, "No, just spots."Now, let me share another humorous story. There was a man who was always bragging about his intelligence. One day, he decided to prove it by taking an IQ test. When theresults came back, he was shocked to find out that he had a low IQ. He couldn't believe it and said, "This must be a mistake! I demand a recount!" 。

These stories always make me laugh, and I hope they brought a smile to your face as well.中文回答:让我先讲一个关于一个去看医生的人的有趣故事。

这个人对医生说,“医生,我总是看到眼前有斑点。

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】

初中幽默英语演讲稿【精选3篇】演讲稿是进行演讲的依据,是对演讲内容和形式的标准和提示,下面是为大家收集的初中幽默英语演讲稿,供大家参考。

Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town."Let’s go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven’t been anywhere for a long time."Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I’m not going to spend much money. We’ll look at things, but we won’t buy anything. "They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were ny things Matt’s wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.Then, in a nearby field, they saw a s ll airplane."Fun flights!" the noti said, " $$ 10 for 10 minutes.Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn’t want to have to pay for his wife, as well."I’ve only got $$ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife e with me for free?" The pilot wasn’t selling ny tickets, so he said, "I’ll ke a bargain with you. If your wife doesn’t scream or shout, she can have a free flight."Matt agreed, and got into the s ll airplane with his wife.The pilot took off and de his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn’t ke a sound. She can have her ride free.""Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn’t easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."One of the most popular hobbies among people is reading books. More and more people spend their spare time in reading the books they are interested in.There are so ny books in the world that it is impossible for any one to read all of them, even if he spends his whole life in reading. Before we start reading, we should find out whether it is valuable for us to read.Reading good books is one of the greatest pleasures in life. It can enrich our knowledge. It kes us learn lots of things we did not previously know. We can be aware of what had happened in the past as well as what is happening in the present time. The more books we read, the more knowledge we get. No tter how much education we re ive or how much expensive we have, we can not bee a full n unless we keep reading.Reading bad books will lead you to a wrong way and prevents you from progressing. It’s worse than reading nothing. So we know how important it is to read good books.book can be read at random time if you have leisure, and there never be a time limitation. Also, you can read a book to achieve a more really history. Through a book, you can municate with its author without other’s tran ission. All these rarely can be easily achieved by a television.Furthermore, book is a treasure that has developed nturies. As we know when written language appeared, hu n beings became use it to record their lives, and this action leaves us a lot of historic precious mineral. We can absorb in igen and wisdom, and we can also be taught lessons. I love book from my heart, form book I know how to municate with others, and I learn my homeland is the pla I love best, and also I know my parents are the very individuals who I love through my life. What about the television? Television, sometimes, show violen , , drugs beyond our choi .Love Your Mother爱你的母亲Why are you crying, a young boy asked his Mom?你哭?一个小男孩问他的妈妈."Because I'm a wo n," she told him.因为我是女人,她告诉他."I don't understand," he said.我不明白.他答复His Mom just hugged him and said,"And you never will, but that's O.K.".......妈妈拥抱了他说,"你永远也不会明白,但没关系..."Later the little boy asked his father,"Why does Mom seem to cry for no reason?".后来小男孩问他的父亲"妈妈似乎在无缘无故的哭泣?""All women cry for no reason," was all his Dad could say......"所有的女人都会常常没有原因地哭泣",这是他的父亲唯一可以解释的...The little boy grew up and became a n,still wondering why women cry.等到小男孩长大,成了男人的时候,他仍然奇怪妈妈哭.Finally he put in a call to God and when God got back to him, he asked "God, why do women cry so easily?"最后他把这件事祷告给上帝,他问"上帝, 女人容易哭泣?"GOD answered......上帝答复:"When I de wo n,I decided she had to be special.I de her shouldersstrong enough to carrythe weight of the world, yet,de her arms gentle enough to give fort... "当我创造女人的时候,我决定把她造的很特别,我让她的双肩强壮的足以能够承当整个世界,但是, 却让她的双臂温柔的足够去抚慰他人...I gave her the inner strengthto endure childbirthand the rejectionthat ny times will eeven from her own children.我给她内在的力量去忍受生产的剧痛, 也让她有勇气承受无数的伤害,甚至这些伤害有时会于自己的孩子...I gave her a hardnessthat allows herto keep going and take careof her family and friends,even when everyone else gives up, through sickneand fatigue withoutplaining....我给她顽强,让她能够不断地前进,并且照顾自己的家人和朋友,甚至当每个人都放弃的时候,她却能够坚强地在疾病和劳累之时毫无怨言...I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all yanjianggao/ircumstan s. Even when her child has hurt her badly....She has the very special power to ke a child's boo-boo feel better and to quell a teenager's anxieties and fears....我给她内心的敏感,让她在任何环境下都深爱着自己的孩子.甚至在他们深深伤害她的时候...她用那特别的力量,让年幼孩子的在受伤的时候感到抚慰,也能够让年轻的子女消除紧张与恐惧...I gave her strength to care for her hu and, despite faultsand I fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart....我给她力量关心她的丈夫,尽管他会犯错.我用男人的肋骨创造了女人,使女人可以保护男人的心脏...I gave her wisdom to know that a good hu and never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly....我给她智慧,让她知道一个好丈夫永远不会伤害他的妻子,但有时候会试炼她坚决的永远跟随自己丈夫的能力与决心.For all of this hard work,I also gave her a tear to shed.It is hers to usewhenever needed andit is her only weakness....When you see her cry,her how much you love her, and all she does for everyone, and even thoughshe y still cry, you will have de her heart feel good.因为这些种种的困难,我也同样赐她流下眼泪,这是当她在需要时可以使用的,这是她唯一的软弱之处...当你看到她哭泣的时候,告诉她你有多么地爱她,告诉她她为所有人所做的一切,即使这样她可能还是会哭泣,但你会使她的心里得到抚慰.She is special!Please send this to women you know, and those with mothers, sisters, and special women in their lives.她是独特的!请把这个信息传递给你认识的女人,有母亲,姐妹和特别的女性在他们生命里的人.But, also send this to men so they will understand about what a wonderful thing a wo n is.Each day is a mountain that must be climbed; with courage each step gets easier.但是,也把这个信息传递给男人,因此他们会明白女人是多么奇妙的被造物.每一天,生活中都会有必须爬的山,但是勇气会使每一步都更轻松.Love your Mother Always永远爱你的母亲,and keep her Smiling并且使她微笑常在模板,内容仅供参考。

适合初中生英语演讲的幽默小故事有哪些

适合初中生英语演讲的幽默小故事有哪些

适合初中生英语演讲的幽默小故事有哪些演讲稿,是指把为了某一目的,在一定场合下所要讲的话事先用文字有条理的写出来的文稿。

换句话说,凡写出来供宣讲或宣扬的书面材料都叫讲话稿,又称“发言稿”。

一起来看看适合初中生英语演讲的幽默小故事有哪些,欢迎查阅!适合初中生英语演讲的小故事有哪些1Ladies and Gentlemen: My topic is Honesty.As a correspondent of the Qingdao Morning News, I visited Dr. James Gilman, the President of the International Committee for Marco Polo Studies in England. In this picture, this is James, and this is me and we are looking at a dragon’s tooth. This is a true story.65 years ago, James lived in Qingdao. Then he was only 5 years old. He often visited the Aquarium and was fascinated by a creature on display there, which he thought was a dragon. He was afraid of its sharp teeth and wanted one to keep as a treasure.In the late 1930s, when the Japanese occupied Qingdao, his family had to leave. On his last day in Qingdao, he ran to the Aquarium and pulled out one of the teeth from the dragon’s mouth.He kept the tooth for the ne_t 65 years, but the feeling of guilt at having stolen it was there in the background all through his life. It was always on his conscience, and the feeling intensified as he became older. Finally he decided to put right his childish error. In 20__, he visited Qingdao and returned it to the Aquarium with his sincere apologies. He received a warm welcome.When James visited Qingdao, I accompanied him all the time and reported on his visit. I was deeply touched by his honesty. Ithas taught me a lot. I think to err is human. The important thing is to have the courage to admit and correct one’s error.Honesty is a vital quality of human behaviour. So we should try to keep an honest mind in everything we say and do. I would like to say to all of my friends: Let’s be honest people of good moral character.Thank you.适合初中生英语演讲的小故事有哪些2ladies and gentlemen , good afternoon! i‘m very glad to stand here and give you a short speech. today my topic is ―youth‖. i hope you will like it , and found the importance in your youth so that more cherish it. first i want to ask you some questions: 1、do you know what is youth? 2、how do you master your youth? youth youth is not a time of life, it is a state of mind ;it is not rosy cheeks , red lips and supple knees, it is a matter of the emotions : it is the freshness ;it is the freshness of the deep springs of life . youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite , for adventure over the love of ease. this often e_ists in a man of 60 more than a boy of 20 . nobody grows old merely by a number of years . we grow old by deserting our ideals. years wrinkle the skin , but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul . worry , fear , self –distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust . whether 60 of 16 , there is in every human being ?s heart the lure of wonders, the unfailing childlike appetite of what‘s ne_t and the joy of the game of living . in the center of your heart and my heart there‘s a wireless station : so long as it receives messages of beauty , hope ,cheer, courage and power from men and from the infinite, so long as you are young . when the aerials are down , and your spirit is covered with snows ofcynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old ,even at 20 , but as long as your aerials are up ,to catch waves of optimism , there is hope you may die young at 80. thank you!适合初中生英语演讲的小故事有哪些3Good morning, everyone! My name is ____. I’m a student of Great 7 from _x_middle school. I ’m very glad to stand here and give you a short speech today. My topic is “I love English”.English is now used everywhere in the world. It has become the most common language on Internet and for international trade. More and more people has begun to learn English now .As for me, I love English soon when I began to learn it. I find the great beauty of English language from English songs, English stories and English book. Learning English makes me confident and give me a new colorful world.I love English. I hope I can travel around the world one day. I want to go to America, I also want to go to London. If I can ride my bike in New York University, how happy I’ll be!I love English. I hope I can make friends with many people from different countries. I will introduce China to them proudly in English, Such as Great Wall and the Summer Palace.I know Rome was not built in a day. I believe that I can speak English very well one day if I can study hard. At that time, my dream will come ture.That’s all. Thanks for your listening!适合初中生英语演讲的小故事有哪些4Dear teacher and classmates:I am very glad to say something here. At this time, Id like to talk about my hobbies.I have many hobbies. First, I like playing video games. Computer games are cool. I could play it all day. Second, I like allkinds of sports. I love fresh air and sunshine. Playing football with friends is fun.Swimming in the sea is my favorite. I also like to draw pictures at home. Further more, I like music. I like singing. I often sing film songs when I walk in the street. Of course, I learn English everyday. As you know, English is used everywhere in the world. So I learn English very hard. I hope I can travel around the world and speak English with foreigners some day.There is more I like to do. There is more I want to say. Maybe I can tell you more ne_t time. Thank you for listening.适合初中生英语演讲的小故事有哪些5today i am very glad to be here to share with you my ideas of success. what is success? it is what everyone is longing for.sometimes success would be rather simple. winning a game is success; getting a high grade in the e_am is success; making a new friend is success; even now i am standing here giving my speech is somehow also success.however, as a person’s whole life is concerned, success becomes very complicated. is fortune success? is fame success? is high social status success? no, i don’t think so. i believe success is the realization of people’s hopes and ideals.nowadays, in the modern society there are many people.who are regarded as the successful. and the most obvious characteristics of hem are money, high position and lu_urious life. so most people believe that s success and all that they do is for this purpose. but the problem is wether it is real success. we all know there are always more money, higher position and better condition in front of us. if we keep chasing them, where is the end? what will satisfy us at last? therefore, we can see, to get the real success we must need something inside, which is therealization of people’ hopes and ideals.。

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Big Head
“All the kids make fun of me”the boy cried to his mother.“They say I have a big head”“Don't listen to them.”his mother comforted him.“You have a beautiful head .Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes”
“Where's the shopping bag?”
“I haven't got one,use your hat.”
大脑袋
“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑,”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说:“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。


“别听他们的,”他妈妈安慰说:“你的脑袋长得很漂亮。

好了,别哭了,去商店买10磅土豆来。


“购物袋在哪?”
“我没有购物袋,就用你的帽子吧。


Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。

“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。

“再给你两分钱。

可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。


Where is the father?
Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the
children. Where is the father?"
The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."
父亲在哪儿?
兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。

“看,”哥哥说,“这些画多漂亮呀!”
“是啊,”弟弟说道,“可是在所有这些画中,只有妈妈和孩子。

那爸爸去哪儿了呢?”
哥哥想了会儿,然后解释道:“很明显,他当时正在画这些画呗。


An Alarm Clock
A young man went to a mountain village for his holiday. One night he stayed at a small hotel near a train station.
Before going to bed, he went to th e owner of the hotel and said to the old man, “ Excuse me, sir. Will you please wake me up at a quarter to five? I'm going to take the five o'clock train tomorrow morning. ”
“ Oh, sorry, ” the owner said, “ I am afraid I can't. I don't get up that early. ”
The young man started to go back to his room when he stopped and asked, “ Do you have an alarm clock? That would help me. ”
“ Yes, here it is, young man. ”
The young man took the clock happily and thanked the old man. But when he looked at it carefully, there appeared to be something wrong with it.
“ Does it ring on time? ” he asked the old man.
“ Sure! Just shake it when it's time to get up, and it'll ring. ”
一只闹钟
一个年轻人到一个山村去度假。

那天夜里,他住宿在火车站附近的一个旅馆里。

上床睡之前,他对旅馆老板——一个老头儿说:“对不起,先生,请问您能在五点差一刻叫醒我吗?我明天早晨要乘五点的火车。


“哦,很抱歉”,旅馆老板说,“恐怕不行,我不可能起那么早。


年轻人正想回到房间去,又停住了问:“那你有闹钟吗?或许它能帮助我。


“我有,给你,年轻人。


年轻人很高兴地拿了闹钟,谢了老头儿。

但当他仔细查看了闹钟后,发现似乎有毛病。

“它能准时闹吗?”他问老头儿。

“那当然!时间一到,你摇一摇,他就会响的。


One Engine Left
A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a r esult."
Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."
At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"
只剩一个引擎
一架747客机正在跨越大西洋时,喇叭里传来了机长的声音:“旅客们请注意,我们的四个引擎中有一个丢失了。

但剩下的三个引擎会把我们带到伦敦的。

只是我们要因此晚到一小时。

” 过了一会儿,旅客们又听到机长的声音:“各位,你们猜怎么啦?我们刚又掉了第三个引擎。

但请你们相信好了。

只有一个引擎我们也能飞,但要晚三个小时了。

” 正在这时,一位乘客非常气愤地说:“看在上帝的份上,如果我们再掉一个引擎,我们就要整夜都要呆在天上了。

”。

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