英语小笑话大全

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2023英语讲小笑话,3篇

2023英语讲小笑话,3篇

2023英语讲小笑话,3篇(范例推荐)英语讲的小笑话1雇主和雇员Workman: “Mr. Brown, I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages.I have just been married."Employer: "Very sorry, my dear man, but I can"t help you. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside the factory we are not responsible."工人:“布朗先生,我想请您给我加一点工资。

我刚刚结了婚。

”雇主:“非常抱歉,老兄,但是我无能为力。

对工人在厂外发生的`事故我们概不负责。

”英语讲的小笑话2第一次开出租车A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath1, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.The driver said, "Look mate, don"t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn"t realize that a little tap would scare you so much." The driver replied, "Sorry, it"s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I"ve been drivinga funeral van for the last 25 years."乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀,想问个问题。

读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话

读英文的笑话笑话1:Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent!笑话2:Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!笑话3:I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.笑话4:I bought shoes from a drug dealer once. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!笑话5:I asked the librarian if she had any books on paranoia. She whispered, "They're right behind you!"笑话6:Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!笑话7:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话8:I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.笑话9:I saw a wino eating grapes. I told him, "You have to wait!"笑话10:I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually, it came back to me.笑话11:Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!笑话12:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话13:My friend told me that I should be more optimistic. I said, "Okay, I'm positive!"笑话14:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话15:Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them!笑话16:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!笑话17:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话18:I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.笑话19:I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.笑话20:Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!笑话21:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话22:What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!笑话23:Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!笑话24:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话25:Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!笑话26:What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!笑话27:Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!笑话28:I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.笑话29:What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!笑话30:Why don't calculators go to the beach? Because they can't handle the waves!以上是30个英文笑话的集合,希望你能通过阅读它们,享受一段愉快的时光并大笑一番!笑话的目的是为了带给我们快乐和轻松,让我们忘记生活中的压力和烦恼。

英语小笑话 带翻译

英语小笑话 带翻译
笑话三中,“gummy bear”一词既可以指果冻熊(一种美国产的以果胶为胶体基质凝固制成的糖果),也可以表示没有牙齿的熊。这个笑话也是通过双关的方式,将不同的词语联系在一起,形成了幽默效果。
笑话四中,“home”既可以指家,也可以指“归宿”,所以员工中奖后“去家里了”也可以理解为“找到了自己的归宿”。这个笑话利用了“home”这个词的双重含义,变相映射了中奖后员工的行为。
Because it had too many problems.
为什么数o you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
你怎么称呼一个没有牙齿的熊?
果冻熊。
笑话四:What did the employee do after winning the lottery?
笑话五中,“held up”一词既可以指阻碍、延误,也可以指抢劫。所以这个笑话的双关在于通过皮带的“支撑”和“阻碍”之间的联系,制造了一种幽默效果。
总结来说,这几个笑话利用了英语的语言特点,通过双关的方式,让人在听到笑话的瞬间产生一种意想不到的幽默感。这也正是英语笑话的魅力所在,通过语言的巧妙运用,创造出了一种诙谐的氛围,让人忍俊不禁。希望大家在学习英语的同时,多多接触英语笑话,感受英语语言的魅力。
英语小笑话 带翻译
笑话一:Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
老师:你爸爸有没有帮你做功课?
学生:没有,是他自己全部做的。
笑话二:Why was the math book sad?
笑话一中,学生回答“他自己全部做的”是指他的父亲没有帮助他,但也可以理解为“他”指的是学生的父亲,他自己做了所有的功课。这是一个双关的笑话,利用了英语中的语言特点,呈现了一种幽默的效果。

英语爆笑小笑话12篇

英语爆笑小笑话12篇

英语爆笑小笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑小笑话,希望大家会喜欢!英语爆笑小笑话:智力缺陷"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied, "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "Well, what sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' " Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."“医生,你能不能告诉我,”鲍勃问,“对于一个看上去很正常的人,你是怎样判断出他有智力缺陷的呢?”“再没有比这容易的了,”医生回答,“问他一个简单的问题,简单到所有人都知道答案,如果他回答得不干脆,那你就知道是怎么回事了。

英语搞笑笑话12篇

英语搞笑笑话12篇

英语搞笑笑话12篇下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话:两颗番茄he first tomato has no answer, the second tomato asked again. The tomato has no answer, so the second tomato asked again. The first tomato finally turned slowly, said: "we are not tomatoes? We can talk?"两颗番茄去逛街,第一颗番茄突然走得很快,第二颗番茄就问:“我们要去哪里?” 第一颗番茄没有回答,第二颗番茄又问了一次。

第一颗番茄还没回答,所以第二颗番茄又问了一次。

第一颗番茄终于慢慢转头说:“我们不是番茄吗?我们会说话吗?”英语搞笑笑话:相同的职责The Same DutiesA retired four-star general ran into his former orderly, also retired, in a Manhattan bar and spent the rest of the evening persuading him to come work for him as his valet. "Your duties will be exactly the same as they were in the army," the general said. "Nothing to it-you'll catch on again fast." Next morning promptly at eight o'clock, the ex-orderly entered the ex-general's bedroom, pulled open the drapes, gave the general a gentle shake, strode around the other side of the bed, spanked his employer's wife on her bottom and said, "OK, sweetheart, it's back to the village for you."相同的职责一个退休的四星级将军在曼哈顿的一个酒吧偶然地遇到了他以前的勤务兵,勤务兵也退休在家。

英语小笑话爆笑带翻译

英语小笑话爆笑带翻译

英语小笑话爆笑带翻译英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译(精选8篇)笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。

笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。

店铺精心收集了英语小笑话大全爆笑带翻译(精选8篇),供大家欣赏学习!英语小笑话爆笑带翻译篇1While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(烦躁,发牢骚) andjabbering(快而含糊地说) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.The man's wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."有个人生病了。

他的妻子请了一位医生来给他治病。

医生在给他治疗的时候,他的妻子一直大惊小怪,神神叨叨地紧张不安。

医生对她说:“你的丈夫必须绝对休息和保持安静。

” 然后他就留下了一些安眠药。

她问医生:“什么时候给我丈夫吃这些药呀!”医生回答说:“不用,这些药不是给他吃的,是给你吃的,你需要。

”英语小笑话爆笑带翻译篇2She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."有个女人给她的丈夫买了生日礼物。

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个

英语幽默小笑话100个笑话是一种能够带给人快乐,平添生活乐趣的文凭形式,以其机智、幽默、搞笑的特点,深受人们喜爱。

英语幽默小笑话就是一种给人带来快乐的黑色幽默渐层,也是美国人的一大特色文化。

以下是100个英语幽默小笑话:1、A: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?B: Dam!2、Q: What did the policeman say to his belly?A: Freeze!3、Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?A: Right where you left it.4、Q: What did the tie say to the hat?A: You go on a head, and I hang around.5、Q: Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?A: He wanted to improve his bite.6、Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?A: Dam!7、Q: What did the tree say to autumn?A: Leaf me alone.8、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!9、Q: What did the monster say when he swallowed a clown?A: You taste funny.10、Q: Why don scientists trust atoms?A: Because they make up everything.11、Q: How do you make a tissue dance?A: You put a little boogie in it.12、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.13、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug.14、Q: Why don vampires like going to parties?A: They don like to get sucked into conversations.15、Q: What did the bee say when it hit the window?A: Oh, buzz off!16、Q: Why did the scarecrow get promoted?A: Because he was outstanding in his field.17、Q: What did the barrel say to the other barrel?A: We can stand each other!18、Q: How do you make a hoodie laugh?A: Tell it a joke hoodie-style.19、Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: Put it on my bill.20、Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth?A: A gummy bear.21、Q: why don astronauts play cards in space?A: Because they float away!22、Q: How do you make an octopus laugh?A: With ten-tickles.23、Q: What did the sheep say to the shepherd?A: Nothing, it just baa-ed.24、Q: What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?A: Odor in the court!25、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!26、Q: What did the helium balloon say to the air?A: Nothing, it just let out a little squeak.27、Q: What did the computer say when it crashed?A: Hey, I having a bad day!28、Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?A: Nice belt!29、Q: What did the paperclip say to the magnet?A: I find you very attractive.30、Q: What did the silverware say to the plate?A: You complete me!31、Q: What did the pirate say when he turned 80?A: Aye matey!32、Q: What did the light bulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!33、Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? A: You too young to smoke!34、Q: What did the clock say to the other clock?A: Don worry, I right behind you.35、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!36、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!37、Q: What did the hamburger say to the hotdog?A: We make a great pair!38、Q: What did the rain say to the dirt?A: Let go make some mud pies!39、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: You can count on me!40、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?A: Dam!41、Q: What did the elephant say to the birthday cake? A: Nothing, it just gave it a big hug!42、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!43、Q: What did the alien say to the dad?A: Take me to your leader!44、Q: What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?A: Hold on to your leaves!45、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!46、Q: What did the carrot say to the rabbit?A: Let go for a hop!47、Q: What did the teacher say to the pencil?A: You looking sharp!48、Q: What did the rock say to the cliff?A: Hang in there!49、Q: What did the letter say to the envelope?A: Let stick together!50、Q: What did the mama bee say to her lazy bee?A: Wake up and Bee productive!51、Q: What did the cowboy say when he lost his horse? A: Howdy, saddle-less!52、Q: What did the egg say to the frying pan?A: You crack me up!53、Q: What did the key say to the lock?A: It so nice to see you again!54、Q: What did the snail say to the turtle?A: Hurry up!55、Q: What did the cowboy say to the cactus?A: How it hanging?56、Q: What did the doctor say to the patient?A: Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.57、Q: What did the bicycle say to the car?A: You may be faster, but I more fun!58、Q: What did the two antennas say to each other? A: You look good, girl!59、Q: What did the octopus say to the philosopher? A: I think, therefore I am eight!60、Q: What did the big hand say to the little hand? A: Let get to work!61、Q: What did the tomato say to the other tomato? A: You looking a little red today.62、Q: What did the duck say to the waiter?A: Put it on my bill.63、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: I here to pollenate!A: Bee yourself!65、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Worm your way out!66、Q: What did the fish say to the whale?A: You a big fish in a small pond.67、Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?A: Write on me!68、Q: What did the teapot say to the cup?A: Time for a cup of tea!69、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Buzz off!70、Q: What did the noodle say to the other noodle? A: Let have a pasta party!71、Q: What did the alarm clock say to the bed?A: Time to wake up!72、Q: What did the tree say to the wind?A: Leaf me alone!73、Q: What did the tree say to the other tree?A: What a re-leaf!74、Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall? A: Dam!A: You looking sharp!76、Q: What did the calculator say to the math book?A: Let work it out!77、Q: What did the bird say to the worm?A: Wanna come out and play?78、Q: What did the elephant say to the mouse?A: You so tiny!79、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Let make honey!80、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!81、Q: What did the frog say to the fly?A: Time for dinner!82、Q: What did the pizza say to the oven?A: Let get cooking!83、Q: What did the fish say when it saw a boat?A: That a big hook!84、Q: What did the elephant say when he saw the mouse? A: That tiny!85、Q: What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? A: We have a lot in common!86、Q: What did the ball say to the other ball?A: Let play catch!87、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Bee mine!88、Q: What did the ice cream cone say to the other ice cream cone?A: Let have a scoop!89、Q: What did the tree say to the axe?A: Chop chop!90、Q: What did the pencil say to the eraser?A: Let work it out!91、Q: What did the horse say when it tripped?A: Neigh!92、Q: What did the scarecrow say when it got promoted? A: I outstanding in my field!93、Q: What did the pelican say to the other pelican? A: Let go for a dive!94、Q: What did the bee say to the other bee?A: Hey, bee-friend!95、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Let make honey!96、Q: What did the lightbulb say to the switch?A: You turn me on!97、Q: What did the firefly say to the other firefly? A: Let light up the night!98、Q: What did the bee say to the flower?A: Smell me!99、Q: What did the spider say to the fly?A: You in my web now!100、Q: What did the bee say to the beekeeper?A: Let me out of this hive!从上述100个英语幽默小笑话可以看出,英语幽默小笑话涵盖了生活中的各种场景,不论是小动物、植物、机械还是自然现象,都能以机智、幽默、搞笑的方式进行描述。

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)

英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)英国人有他们独特的英式幽默,他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑,今天,小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话,希望大家能开心开心,一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:吠狗不咬人。

;”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说:“你的英语最近学的怎么样?”“很好,我过去不懂英国人说话,可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。

”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。

20篇简短英语笑话

20篇简短英语笑话

20篇简短英语笑话1. Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!2. Why don't scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!3. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!4. Why don't skeletons fight each other?They don't have the guts!5. Why did the tomato turn red?Because it saw the salad dressing!6. What do you call a bear with no teeth?A gummy bear!7. Why don't oysters donate to charity?Because they are shellfish!8. What did one wall say to the other wall?I'll meet you at the corner!9. Why don't scientists trust stairs?Because they're always up to something!10. What kind of shoes do thieves wear?Sneakers!11. Why don't skeletons fight each other?They don't have the guts!12. Why did the bicycle fall over?Because it was two-tired!13. What do you call fake spaghetti?An impasta!14. How do you organize a space party?You planet!15. Why did the math book look sad?Because it had too many problems!16. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!17. Why did the stadium get hot after the game?All of the fans left!18. What do you call a fish wearing a crown?King Cod!19. Why don't scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!20. How do you catch a squirrel?Climb a tree and act like a nut!总结:以上是20个简短的英语笑话,每个笑话都是一个独立的小故事,通过幽默诙谐的句子展示出逗人发笑的效果。

英语小幽默笑话

英语小幽默笑话

英语小幽默笑话一、教室里的笑话一天,小明走进教室,发现黑板上写着一行字:“I'm very good!(我很好!)”于是他皱了皱眉,拿起粉笔在旁边写了一行字:“I'm good too, thank you!(我也很好,谢谢!)”当小明坐下时,他才发现旁边的黑板上写着:“I'm a blackboard!(我是一个黑板!)”二、动物园里的笑话John 去动物园里参观。

他走到狮子旁边,然后用手指挖狮子笼子外面一点点的土。

突然,狮子怒吼一声,跳到笼子外面。

John 吓得立刻跑了起来。

然而,狮子并没有追赶他,反而开始用爪子挖土,好像在等待什么。

John 一边跑一边回头看,这时突然明白过来,原来狮子是在等着他掏出足够多的土,这样狮子就可以把他的手指当早餐了。

三、医院里的笑话将军身体不适,于是他去了医院。

医生给将军把脉后说:“将军,您需要多休息,少工作。

”将军愤怒地说:“我是将军,我必须站在最前线,为国家效力!”医生点点头,继续说道:“我明白了,将军。

那么我们就把床移到最前线吧!”四、旅行的笑话一个美国人,一个英国人和一个中国人一起参加了一个环球旅行团。

当他们来到一个孤岛时,他们被困在那里了。

他们决定每人去找各自国家的救援。

一个月后,美国人挨饿了,但看到了一点希望。

他用信号枪向天空发出了SOS。

几天后,一架直升飞机来把他救走了。

两个月后,英国人饿得快死了,但他坚信救援一定会来。

于是他写了一封希望的信并抛入大海。

几天后,一个军舰把他救了起来。

而中国人一直没有食物,他只好靠椰子充饥。

六个月后,他终于爬到了岛的最高峰,大喊一声:“我是第一批到达这个岛屿的人!”五、餐厅里的笑话一位顾客走进餐厅,服务员领他坐下,然后递给他菜单。

一会儿,服务员走过来问:“先生,您想点什么?”顾客犹豫了一下,然后说道:“给我请一个有人性的厨师。

”服务员笑笑,离开了。

等了一会儿,服务员回来了,手上端着一个镜子。

他把镜子递给顾客说:“先生,这是我们厨师的倒影。

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)

英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)下面是编辑整理的英语小笑话,希望能让您捧腹大笑!英语小笑话【一】1、The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译:鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。

把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。

小女孩回答道。

2、律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off"翻译:一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的”律师哀怨地说。

关于比较经典的英语笑话10条最短的英语笑话

关于比较经典的英语笑话10条最短的英语笑话

关于比较经典的英语笑话10条最短的英语笑话关于比较经典的英语笑话篇1Patient:Doctor,IthinkIneedglae.Teller:Youcertainlydo!Thiiabank.病人:“医生,我想我得配副眼镜。

”银行职员:“你当然需要!这里是银行。

”关于比较经典的英语笑话篇2AnArmybratwaboatingabouthifathertoaNavybrat."Mydadianengineer.Hecandoeverything.DoyouknowtheAlp""Ye,"aidtheNavybrat."Mydadhabuiltthem."Thenthenavalkidpoke:"AnddoyouknowtheDeadSea""Ye.""It'mydadwho'killedit!"一个年轻的陆军士兵跟一个海军士兵吹牛,说他爸多么了不起。

“我爸是个工程师。

他什么都会。

你知道阿尔卑斯山么”“知道,”海军说“我爸建的。

”年轻的海军说:“那你知道死海么”“知道。

”“那可是我爸弄死的”关于比较经典的英语笑话篇3ThingHaveBeenOkay一切都正常一对年轻夫妇有个儿子,已经四岁了,还没有开口说话,他们对此深感焦虑。

Theytookhimtopecialit,butthedoctorfoundnothingwrongwithhim.他们带他去找专家诊治,但医生们总觉得他没有毛病。

Thenonemorningatbreakfattheboyuddenlyblurted,Mom,thetoatibur ned.后来有一天早上吃早餐时,那孩子突然开口了:妈妈,面包烤焦了。

Youtalked!Youtalked!Shoutedhimother.你说话了!你说话了!他母亲叫了起来。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短

20个英语笑话爆笑超短1.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!2.I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.3.What did the grape say after the elephant sat on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.4.How does a penguin build its house?Igloos it together!5.Why don’t skeletons fight each other?They don’t have the guts!6.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!7.Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!8.Why don’t eggs tell jokes?Because they might crack up!9.Why was the math book sad?Because it had too many problems!10.What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?An abdominal snowman!11.Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?It was two-tired!12.How does a cucumber become a pickle?It goes through a jarring experience!13.What do you call a bear with no teeth?A gummy bear!14.Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek?Because he was always spotted!15.Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negativenumbers?He will stop at nothing to avoid them!16.Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?Because then they would be bagels!17.What kind of tree fits in your hand?A palm tree!18.Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?Because they taste funny!19.How do you organize a space party?You planet!20.Why don’t scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!以上是20个英语笑话爆笑超短的集合。

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏

20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏一些幽默的英语笑话,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享20个英语笑话爆笑超短,希望大家喜欢这些英语笑话!20个英语笑话爆笑超短篇一1.Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。

”“不要相信梦,亲爱的。

据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。

”妈妈答道。

“那么,我真希望在今晚的梦中,我的其他功课都不及格。

”汤姆说。

2.On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。

英语小笑话20篇

英语小笑话20篇

英语小笑话20篇英语小笑话(一):A Useful Way 一个有效的方法Father: Jack,why do you drink so much water?Jack: I have just had an apple,Dad。

Father: What"s that got to do with it?Jack: I forgot to wash the apple。

爸爸:杰克,你干嘛喝这么多水呀?杰克:我刚才吃了个苹果,爸爸。

爸爸:可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢?杰克:我忘了洗苹果呀。

英语小笑话(二):我根本就看不见After supper,the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests。

At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV,"Honey,go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while,her son returnedand said,"Ma,the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all。

"晚饭后,父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将,这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来,便对正在看电视的儿子说道:“宝贝,去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿,儿子回来说:“妈,厨房里太黑了,我根本就看不见。

”英语小笑话(三):Tom's excuse 汤姆的借口Teacher: Tom,why are you late for school every day?Tom: Every time I e to the corner,a sign says,School-Go Slow。

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇

经典英语笑话6篇英语笑话是指以一句英文短语或一个英文故事让说话者和听者之间觉得好笑,或是产生幽默感,笑话是一种经过艺术加工的语言形式,是艺术化的语言,笑话是一种艺术方法。

下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话一:我要做的一切就是付钱!All I do is pay"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "Mywife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,and my daughter is foreign secretary.""Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?""I’m the people. All I do is pay."布朗先生告诉同事说:“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。

我妻子是财政部长。

我岳母是作战部长,我女儿是外交秘书。

”“听上去挺有意思的,”他的同事说,“那你的职务是什么呢?”“我就是老百姓。

我要做的一切就是付钱。

”英语笑话二:喂狗 For the DogThe family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter."My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?""Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"一家人在饭馆里吃过晚饭,父亲把服务生叫了过来。

英语经典笑话8篇

英语经典笑话8篇

英语经典笑话8篇店铺给大家带来了英语经典笑话,让你开心快乐每一天!英语经典笑话一:1.What dog can jump higher than a building?什么狗比大楼跳的还高?Anydog, buildings can't jump!任何一只狗,大楼又跳不起来。

英语经典笑话二:2.Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home. 老师:谁能回到我下一个问题,谁就可以回家了。

One boy throws his bag out the window.一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。

Teacher: who just threw that?!老师:谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?Boy: Me! I’m going home now.男孩:我!我现在要回家了。

英语经典笑话三:3.What has a head, a tail, and no body?什么有头、有尾,但是没有身体?A coin!硬币。

英语经典笑话四:4.What has one eye but cannot see?什么有一只眼睛,却看不见?A needle.针。

英语经典笑话五:5.Wife: "How would you describe me?"妻子:你会怎么形容我呢?Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."丈夫:ABCDEFGHIJK.Wife: "What does that mean?"妻子:那是什么意思?Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."丈夫:迷人的、魅力的、可爱的、令人愉悦的、优雅的、时髦的、漂亮的和火辣的。

Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"妻子:哇,谢谢,但是“IJK”是什么意思呢?Husband: "I'm just kidding!"丈夫:开个玩笑!英语经典笑话六:Lawyer and EngineerA lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and the insurance company paid for everything.""That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked.一个律师与一个工程师在加勒比海边钓鱼。

英语经典冷笑话

英语经典冷笑话

英语经典冷笑话1. A boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, "No change yet."(一个男孩吞下了一些硬币,被送往医院。

当他奶奶打电话来问他的情况时,一位护士说:“还没有找零。

”)2. Why don't scientists trust atoms?Because they make up everything!(为什么科学家不相信原子?因为它们组成了一切!)3. Teacher: How can we get some clean water?Student: Bring the water from the cleaner's.(老师:我们怎样才能得到一些干净的水?学生:从清洁工那里带水。

)4. Why did the scarecrow win an award?Because he was outstanding in his field!(为什么稻草人赢得了奖项?因为他在自己的领域里是杰出的!)5. Patient: Doctor, I think I'm a rubber band.Doctor: Stretch yourself and prove it.(病人:医生,我觉得我是一根橡皮筋。

医生:伸展一下自己来证明吧。

)6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.(我曾经靠曲调弹奏钢琴,但现在我用我的手。

)7. Why don’t skeletons fight each oth er?They don’t have the guts.(为什么骷髅不互相战斗?因为他们没有胆量。

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英语小笑话大全1、He Won Tommy: How is your little brother Johnny Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: Thats too bad. How did that happen Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window and he won. 他赢了汤姆约翰尼你小弟弟好吗约翰尼他害病卧床了。

他受了伤。

汤姆真糟糕怎么回事儿约翰尼我们做游戏看谁能把身子探出窗外最远他赢了。

2、I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked What happenedA kid bit me replied Ivan. Would you recognize him if you saw him again asked his mother. Id know him any where said Ivan. I have his ear in my pocket. 他的耳朵在我衣兜里伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。

他妈妈问“发生了什么事”“一个男孩咬了我一口”伊凡说。

“再见到他你能认出来吗”妈妈问。

“他走到哪里我都能认出他”伊凡说。

“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。

”3、A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday I gave it to a poor old woman he answered. Youre a good boy said the mother proudly. Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman She is the one who sells the candy. 好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了”“我给了一个可怜的老太婆”他回答说。

“你真是个好孩子”妈妈骄傲地说。

“再给你两分钱。

可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢”“她是个卖糖果的。

”4、Drunk One day a father and his little son were going home. At this age the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now he asked Whats the meaning of the word Drunk dad Well my son his father replied look there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk. But dad the boy said theres only ONE policeman 醉酒一天父亲与小儿子一道回家。

这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄老是有提不完的问题。

他向父亲发问道“爸爸‘醉’字是什么意思”“唔孩子”父亲回答说“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。

如果我把他们看成了四个那么我就算醉了。

”“可是爸爸”孩子说“那儿只有一个警察呀”5、Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guests plate. The visitor smiled put the cheese into his mouth and then said: You must have better eyes than your mother sonny. Where did you find the cheese In the rat-trap sir replied the boy. 好客由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时家里没有奶酪了于是女主人向大家表示歉意。

这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。

过了一会儿他拿着一片奶酪回到房间把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。

客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说“孩子你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。

你在哪里找到的奶酪”“在捕鼠夹上先生。

”那小男孩说。

6、Nest and Hair My sister a primary school teacher was informed by one of her pupils that abird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom. What kind of bird my sister asked.I didnt see the bird ma am only the nest replied the child. Then can you give us a description of the nest my sister encouraged her . Well maam it just resembles your hair. Notes: 1 inform v.告诉 2 nest n.窝巢 3 description n.描述 4 encourage v.鼓励 5 resemble v. 相似类似7、鸟窝与头发我姐姐是一位小学老师。

一次一个学生告诉她说一只鸟儿在教室外的树上垒了个窝。

“是什么鸟呢”我姐姐问她。

“我没看到鸟儿老师只看到鸟窝。

”那孩子回答说。

“那么你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗”我姐姐鼓励她道。

“哦老师就像你的头发一样。

” Ive Just Bitten My Tongue Are we poisonous the young snake asked his mother. Yes dear she replied - Why do you ask Cause Ive just bitten my tongue Notes: 1 poisonous adj.有毒的 2 Cause Ive just bitten my tongue 因为我刚咬了自己的舌头。

句中 Cause 是 Because 的缩略形式。

8、我刚咬破自己的舌头“我们有毒吗”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。

“是的亲爱的”她回答说“你问这个干什么”“因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。

” A Woman Who Fell It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York Citys Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate a plump middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her however she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure she winked at me and said Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet 9、摔倒的女人上下班高峰期我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。

接近门口一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚仰面滑倒了。

她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。

我正准备扶她她却自己爬了起来。

她镇定了一下对我挤了一下眉说道“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗”10、Q: Whats the difference between a monkey and a flea A: A monkey can have fleas but a flea cant have monkeys. 猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。

但除此之外呢那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。

这个答案很有意思吧11、Q: How can you most irritate a farmer A: By treading on his corn 如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物他肯定会生气的而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼他会更生气。

Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”也有“鸡眼”的意思。

12、Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world A: The snail. It carries its house on its back. 因为snail蜗牛的后背上总是背着一所房子所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。

你说呢13、Q: What do people do in a clock factory A: They make faces all day. 一看到make faces这个短语你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀因为除了这个意思以外它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。

14、Q: How do you stop a sleepwalker from walking in his sleep A: Keep him awake. 怎样才能不让梦游者sleepwalker梦游walk in his sleep呢最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。

虽然这不是治疗方法但如果让梦游者醒着呢他的确就不会去梦游了。

15、He is really somebody -- My uncle has 1000 men under him. -- He is really somebody. What does he do -- A maintenance man in a cemetery. 他真是一个大人物 -- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。

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