搞笑英文话剧剧本(三打白骨精)

搞笑英文话剧剧本

Three Times’Beating Monster

人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空E：猪八戒J：沙僧

B：白骨精B1：B变成的村姑B2：B变成的太婆

B3：B变化成的老头N：哪吒

T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now

S: Bajie,map!

E: (摸出，递给S)

S: Look,master (凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E）

T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, nof to bring these pictures of

beautiful girls with you!

E: Oh,master!Forgive me(伸手拿回)

T: (缩

手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west

E: But……

T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map

E: (递)……we have arrived in White Tiger Mou ntain!

Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach do esn’t allow So.

S: Fat Pig!

E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,

I will……….

S: You will what(凶相)

E: (软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).

S: Hm!

T:（轻咳）

Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me

some food

E: You see ,master is hungry,too!

T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!

J: But master,if a monster comes while brother monkeg is away…..

T: Em…….It is a ,do you have any idea

S: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）

E: This is…..

S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of el ectricity from master’s

books. So I made this. No monster can approa ch you if you stay in it!

T: Em……Wukong,you are becoming more and more scientific!

Emitofo, knowledge is power!

S: Bye!(走)

T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》

B: Hm!Hm!Electric netYou are too childish.(变成B1)

B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you

T: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Aga inst Landlord and three

people are enough.

B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!

T: Bomb(打出)

B1: Double King!

T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a master-hand . Come in and teachme!(准备开电网门)

S: (回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)

B1: （倒)Ah……

T: (气

愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!

S: She is a monster!

T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)

S: Oh,please don’t……

T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the d oor…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)

S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)

T: (呛住，咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!

B: (真身出

现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)

B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter

T: Daughter...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡)

S: （咬牙切齿）

You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2)

E&J: Are you Ok, master(扶T)

J: Look,(伸食指)how many

T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3)

B3: (看到B1,B2尸

体)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it!!(哭喊)

S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)

T: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶

住)You have killed

three lives!

S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!