初中英语短笑话
英语小笑话适合初一的
英语小笑话适合初一的笑话是一种用来逗笑取乐的文体。
笑话,不仅能让同学们在日常生活和学习中不时地会心一笑,还能从中学习到不少的英语知识。
小编精心收集了适合初一的英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!适合初一的英语小笑话篇1白痴老师If there are any idiots in the room,will they please stand up?" said the sarcastic teacher .喜爱挖苦人的老师说：“如果在这间教室里面有白痴，就请站起来好吗?”。
After a long silence,one rreshman rose to his feet,沉默了很久之后，有一名新生就站起来了。
"Now then mister ,why do you consider yourself an idiot? "enquired the teacher with a sneer.老师就以讥笑的口气问他：“喂，先生，你为什么认为你自己是个白痴呀?”"Well ,actually I don't,"said the student ,"but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."这名学生说：“ 唉呀，实际上我才不认为我是个白痴呢，而是我很讨厌看着你一个人站在那里啦。
”适合初一的英语小笑话篇2交换三明治Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks.有两位律师走进一家小餐厅。
点了两份饮料。
Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.然后他们就从他们的公文包当中拿出三明治开始吃。
The waiter became quite concerned服务生感到相当不妥，and marched over and told them,"You can't eat your own sandeiches in here!"就走过去告诉他们：“你们不可以在这里吃你们自己的三明治!”The attorneys looked each other ,这两位律师彼此。
适合初中学生的英语笑话
适合初中学生的英语笑话从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的调剂品,它使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。
本文是适合初中学生的英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!适合初中学生的英语笑话篇一WomenA Sikh, an Italian & a Frenchman were drinking in a pub when the subject ofWOMAN came up in their conversation.The Italian said, in Italy we treat the woman like a guitar. We press the top & tickle the bottom.The Frenchman said, in France, we treat the woman like cognac. We smell first & then lick slowly. What about the woman in your country,Mr Singh?The Italian asked.In our country, we treat the woman like a record. First we play the front &/when we finish, we flip it over & play the back.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇二Bill GatesBill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by God"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do somethingI've never done before; in your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."Bill replied, " Well, what's the difference between the two?"God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision.""Fine, but where should I go first?""I'll leave that up to you.""Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."So Bill went to Hell.It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature perfect. He was very pleased."This is great!" he told God. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see heaven!""Fine," said God, and off they went. Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision."Hmmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons."How's everything going?" he asked Bill.Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment,"this is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beaches, the beautiful women playing in the water "That was the SCREENSAVER," replied God.适合初中学生的英语笑话篇三CoincidenceA man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a triple martini. The bartender says "What a coincidence, the only other person at the bar is that beautiful woman at the other end. She is also drinking triple martinis".After a few sips of his drink, the man walks up to the woman and says, "Isn't it a coincidence that we are both having the same drink".She replies "Yes! I am here because I am celebrating. After 20 years of trying I am finally pregnant!""What a coincidence" the man replied. "I am also celebrating.After years of experimenting, I have invented a multicolored chicken. At this, the woman asked "How did you ever accomplish that!?"."I had to try a lot of different cocks" he said. The woman replied"What a coincidence"适合初中学生的英语笑话篇四son-in-lawA 60 year old woman came home one day and heard strange noises in her bedroom. She opened the door and discovered her 40 year old daughter playing with a vibrator. "What are you doing?" asked the mother."Mom, I'm 40 years old, and look at me. I'm ugly. I'll never get married so this is pretty much my husband." The mother walked out of the room shaking her head.The next day, the father came home and heard noises in the bedroom. Upon entering the room, he found his daughter using the vibrator."What the hell are you doing he asked.His daughter replied, "I already told mom. I'm 40 years old now and I'm ugly. I will never get married so this is as close as I'll ever get to a husband." The father walked out of the room shaking his head.The next day, the mother came home and found her husband with a beer in one hand and the vibrator in the other watching the football game onTV. "What on Earth are you doing?" she cried.The husband replied, "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having a beer and watching the football game with my son-in-law!!"。
关于初中的英语笑话带翻译
关于初中的英语笑话带翻译笑话是幽默的一个属概念,具有幽默的一切特征。
笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。
本文是关于初中的英语笑话带翻译，希望对大家有帮助!关于初中的英语笑话带翻译篇一How Did You Ever Get HereOne winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. "It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two."The boss eyed him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?""I finally gave up," he said, "and started for home."你是怎样来的?一个冬天的早晨，一名雇员解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟才起来上班。
“外面太滑了，我每向前迈一步，就要向后退两步。
”老板狐疑地看着他。
“噢，是吗?那你是怎样到这里来的?”“后来我决定放弃，”他说，“然后我就往家里走。
”关于初中的英语笑话带翻译篇二Three SurgeonsThree famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist.""That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner.""I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate."三个外科医生三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术。
初中英语笑话
1.Oncetwohunterswenthuntingintheforest.Oneofthem suddenlyfelldownbyaccident.Heshowedthewhitesofhiseyesandseemedtohavec easedbreathing.Theotherhuntersoontookouthis mobilephonetocalltheemergencycenterforhelp.Theoperatorsaidcalmly:"Fir st,youshouldmakesurethatheisalreadydead."Thentheoperatorheardagunshot fromtheotherendofthephoneandnextheheardthehunterasking:"WhatshouldIdo next?"两个猎人进森林里打猎，其中一个猎人不慎跌倒，两眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。
另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。
接线员沉着地说：“第一步，要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。
”于是，接线员在电话里听到一声枪响，然后听到那猎人接着问：“第二步怎办？”2.Letmetakeitdown Anelephantsaidtoamouse,"nodoubtthatyouarethesmallestznd mostuselessthingthatIhaveeverseen.""Pless,sayitagain.Letmetakeitdown."themousesaid."Iwilltella fleawhatIknow."为我所用一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。
”“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。
”老鼠说。
“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
3.WateringFlowerInRainTom:Whydoyouhavethatwateringcan?Dan:I'mgoingtowatertheflowers.Tom:Butit'draining.Dan:That'sOK.I'mwear-ingmyraincoat.雨天浇花汤姆：你拿喷壶做什么？丹：我要去浇花。
初中英语小笑话及翻译
初中英语小笑话及翻译笑话几乎涵盖人们生活的所有领域,其中包括政治笑话、经济笑话、家庭生活笑话、关于民族性格的笑话等。
店铺整理了初中英语小笑话及翻译，欢迎阅读!初中英语小笑话及翻译篇一After 20 years as a pilot，I became an airport manager and soon found the stress was getting to me. I needed a release and wanted to buy a motorcycle，but my family thought it was too dangerous. My wife said，”Why don't you start flying again?"开了20多年的飞机后，我被提升为机场经理。
但不久我就感到了这项工作的压力。
为了放松一下，我想买辆摩托车骑。
可家里人说那太危险。
我妻子还说:“你为什么不继续去开飞机?”The next day，as I showed a businessman around the airport，he looked longingly at the planes. "I used to take flying lessons，but my wife made me quit," he lamented."She said it was dangerous.”第二天，我陪同一个商人参观机场，他紧紧地盯着那些飞机说:“我曾上过飞机课，但我妻子却让我放弃它。
”那商人愤愤地说:“她说那太危险。
”"Tell her you want to get a motorcycle，"I advised. My new-found friend now has his pilot's license.“那你就跟她说你想开摩托车。
[英语笑话带翻译简短的]英语短笑话带翻译初中
![[英语笑话带翻译简短的]英语短笑话带翻译初中](https://img.taocdn.com/s3/m/348ddb3030126edb6f1aff00bed5b9f3f90f72d6.png)
[英语笑话带翻译简短的]英语短笑话带翻译初中简短的英语笑话带翻译篇1A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice:有一名男子正走在街上的时候听到一个声音：“Stop!Stand still!If you take one more step,a brick will fall down on your head and kill you."“停!站住不要动瞅口果你再走一步，就会有一个砖块掉到你的头上砸死你。
”The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him.这名男子停住了，一个大砖块就掉在他的面前。
The man was astonished .这名男子非常惊讶。
He went on,and after a while he was going to cross the road.他继续向前走：不久后，他要穿越马路。
Once again the voice shouted;那个声音再次叫说：Stop!Stand still!If you take one more step a car will over you and you will die."“停!站住不要动，如果你再走一步，就会有一辆汽车辗过你，你就会死掉。
”The man did as he was instructed,这名男子因为曾被指示过，所以就照着做，just as a car came careening around the corner,barely missing him.此时正好有一辆汽车左摇右晃地冲过转角处，差一点撞上他。
"Where are you? " the man asked,"Who are you? "这名男子问说：“你在哪里?你是谁?”"I am your guardian angle," the voice answered.这个声音回答说：“我是你的守护天使。
初中英文小笑话及翻译
初中英文小笑话及翻译前苏联著名作家高尔基说过,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。
”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
小编精心收集了初中英文小笑话及翻译，供大家欣赏学习!初中英文小笑话及翻译篇1相同的投资相同的结果A couple of hunters chartered a small plane to fly them to a forest, and made an appointment with the pilot to come back and fetch them in about two weeks. At the end of the two weeks, they had shot a lot of animals that they wanted to load onto the plane. But the pilot said, "This plane won't be able to take more than one wild buffalo. You'll have to leave the others behind." Then the hunters protested, saying, "But last year, another pilot with the same airplane let us take two buffalos and some other animals in the plane as well."有两个猎人包机前往一座森林，到了以后，他们和飞行员约定好两周后来接。
两周后，他们射了许多动物，而且打算把这些动物全部搬上那架小飞机，可是飞行员说：“这架飞机除了一头野牛外，没办法再多载了。
你们必须把其他的猎物都留下。
” 猎人说：“但是去年另一个飞行员开一样的飞机，就让我们带两只水牛，还有一些其他的动物上机!”So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical, but finally he said, "OK, since you did it last year, I guess this year we can do it again." Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring area. The three men climbed out and looked around, and one hunter said to the other, "Where do you think we are now?" The second one surveyed the area and said, "I think we're about one mile to the left of the place we crashedlast year." 因为他们这样抗议，所以那个新飞行员想了一想后，尽管还是有点存疑，最后还是妥协说：“好吧!如果去年可以做到，今年应该也可以。
关于初中英语小笑话大全
关于初中英语小笑话大全近些年,冷笑话作为一种特殊的幽默方式在互联网、电视节目、书籍杂志上广泛流传。
我整理了关于初中英语小笑话，欢迎阅读!关于初中英语小笑话篇一At the bank where I was employed as a teller we were not allowed to eat while working. But one day，five months pregnant，I was ravenous. I opened a bag of potato chips and started to devour them. Just then I spotted one of our best customers and his wife heading my way. Quickly, I wiped my mouth and greeted them. As I processed their transaction，I noticed they were looking at me oddly.在银行我做出纳员，这里规定工作时不许吃东西。
但有一天，我因怀孕五个月有点嘴馋，打开了一包土豆片，开始偷吃起来。
这时，我看见一个熟悉的顾客和他的妻子朝我的窗口走来。
我匆忙地擦了一下嘴，向他们打了个招呼。
当我在给他们办理业务时，我注意到他们一直用一种异样的目光看着我。
On their way out, the man said,“I don't understand these youngpeople.”在他们往外走的路上，那个男的说:“我真搞不懂这些年轻人。
’，"Dear，that's a fashion statement，”his wife explained."It's a new type of brooch.”“亲爱的，那是新潮。
有关英语小笑话带翻译初中生可以理解
有关英语小笑话带翻译初中生可以理解在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。
小编精心收集了有关英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!有关英语小笑话带翻译篇1Son： Mum ,if someone broke your best. vase what would you do?儿子：妈妈，如果有人打碎了你最好的花瓶，你会怎么办?Mum：I'd spank him and send him to bed without any supper!妈妈：我要揍他，还不让他吃晚饭就去睡觉!Son： Well,you' d better get the slipper. Dad's just broken it !儿子：好了，你准备好拖鞋吧，爸爸刚把那只花瓶摔碎了。
有关英语小笑话带翻译篇2Nurse: Don't you like your new baby sister, Johnny?保姆: 约翰尼，你难道不喜欢你新生的小妹妹?Johnny: She's all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.约翰尼: 她还可以，但要是个男孩就好了。
威利·史密斯有一个新生的小妹妹。
现在他该认为我又在跟他学了。
有关英语小笑话带翻译篇3Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johmmy,and now there is only one piece left. Can you explain that?妈妈: 约翰尼，我今天早上在橱子里放了两块点心。
七年级英语短的笑话
七年级英语短的笑话笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。
小编精心收集了七年级英语短的笑话，供大家欣赏学习!七年级英语短的笑话篇1Make your fortune"How did you make your fortune?""I became the partner of a rich man.He had the money and I had the experience.""How did that help?""Now he has the experience and I the money."计划你的将来“你是怎么计划你的将来的?”“我变成一个富人的合伙人，他有钱，我有经验。
”“那有什么用?”“现在他有经验了，我有钱。
”七年级英语短的笑话篇2Boxing and RunningDan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, "This is a tough world, so I’m teaching my boy to fight."Friend: "But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who’s also been taught how to box."Dan: "I’m teaching him how to run, too."拳击和赛跑丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。
他告诉他的朋友：“这是一个粗暴的世界，所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。
”朋友：“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大，健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办?”丹：“我也会教他怎么样赛跑呢。
”七年级英语短的笑话篇3LawyersA drunk stands up in a bar and shouts, "All Lawyers are scumbags". Another drunk stands up and yells, "Hey, I resent that remark". The first drunk yells. "Why are you a lawyer". "No", said the second drunk, "I’m a scumbag".律师一喝醉了的人在一声酒吧呼喊,"所有的律师都是无赖" 。
关于初中英语小笑话精选
关于初中英语小笑话精选民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。
小编精心收集了关于初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习! 关于初中英语小笑话篇1It was sunny and warm when our neighbor, Danny，left home for his first day of school. He was the proud if reluctaut possessor of a new sport coat and tie，since his school had a dress requirement.今天是个晴天，天气暖和。
我的邻居丹尼今天第一天上学。
因为学校在穿着上有所要求，丹尼只好穿上新运动衣，还戴上条有带。
At dismissal time，it was hot out. I could see Danny's mom watching from her front door to catch a glimpse of her handsome young man getting off the school bus. Finally，he appeared- tie undone，lunch box in hand，no coat in sight.下午放学时，天气有点热。
我看见丹尼的母亲站在门口，等着看看她那漂亮儿子从校车上下来。
一会儿丹尼出现了。
领带没系，夹着午饭盒，新运动衣不见了.His mother yelled，"Danny，where's your jacket?"母亲生气地喊道:“丹尼，你的运动衣呢?”“It's okay，Mom，"he hollered. "It's in my lunch box.”他喊看说:“别担心，它在我的午餐盒里.”关于初中英语小笑话篇2Racehorse owner Bradley had all his horses' names begin with the letter B, including one called Bad News. When someone asked why he gave the horse a name with such a negative connotation，Bradley explained，"Bad News travels fast. "布瑞德利是养赛马的。
英语短笑话带翻译初中
英语短笑话带翻译初中 笑话是⼀种重要的交际⼿段,在⼈们的⽇常⽣活中起着重要作⽤,在社会⽂化中占据着重要地位。
下⾯是店铺带来的初中英语短笑话带翻译，欢迎欣赏! 初中英语短笑话带翻译篇1 John is not a "good" student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again. "John!" Teacher says angrily. "What? What's wrong?" John is awaken. "Why do you make a face? It's classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing." Teacher says. "No one is laughing." Teacher says. "No, it's not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping." John fells upset. "Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy." Teacher is satisfied with it. 约翰并不是个“好”学⽣。
他总是在上课的时候睡觉。
今天他⼜睡着了。
“约翰!”⽼师⽣⽓地喊他。
“什么?出什么事了?”约翰醒了。
“你为什么要做⿁脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”⽼师⽣⽓地说。
“没有⼈在笑呀。
”其他同学笑声地嘀咕。
“不，不是我。
我没有做⿁脸。
刚才我睡着了。
”约翰感到不安。
“嗯，还不错。
你承认⾃⼰的错误，还是给好孩⼦”⽼师为此感到满意。
初中英语短笑话带翻译篇2 Tony and his father are eating dinner. Suddenly Tony asks his father, "Dad, are flies yummy?" Dad frowns and says, "No, I think it's yucky. Why do you ask me this question? It's a silly question." But Tony says, "There was one fly in your plate." 托尼正和他爸爸⼀起吃晚餐。
初中英语小笑话带翻译
初中英语小笑话带翻译在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。
店铺整理了初中英语小笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!初中英语小笑话带翻译篇一always thirsty 总感到口渴"i had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。
”"that's terrible!" said the friend. "got any pain?"“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗?”"no, but i am always thirsty!"“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。
”初中英语小笑话带翻译篇二Two Birds 两只鸟Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。
谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
Teacher: Please tell us.老师：请说说看。
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
初中英语小笑话带翻译篇三if i am a managerone day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – if i am a manager.all the students began to write except a boy. the teacher went to him and asked the reason.“i am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer.如果我是一个经理一天课上，老师要同学们以“如果我是一个经理”为题写一篇作文。
初一英语小笑话短的
初一英语小笑话短的笑话作为民间口头创作,深受广大人民喜爱,笑话从一定程度上反映了社会现实、民族心态及价值观。
小编精心收集了初一短的英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!初一短的英语小笑话篇1The Doctor Knows BetterA man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to the hospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "I think that he is very ill.""I am afraid that he is dead." said the doctor.Hearing this, the man moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive.""Be quiet, " said the wife. "the doctor knows better than you!"一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院。
他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说：“我想他伤得很厉害。
”医生说：“恐怕他已经死了。
”听到医生的话，这个男人转动着头说：“我没死，我还活着。
”妻子说：“安静，医生比你懂得多。
”初一短的英语小笑话篇2After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后，父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将，这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来，便对正在看电视的儿子说道：“宝贝，去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?” 过了一会儿，儿子回来说：“妈，厨房里太黑了，我根本就看不见。
关于初中英语小笑话3篇
关于初中英语小笑话3篇冷笑话是近几年新兴的一种语言现象,它轻松诙谐、别具一格,给我们紧张的生活增添了几分轻松的情趣,它一出现便受到了大多数人的喜爱。
小编精心收集了关于初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!关于初中英语小笑话篇1Every year，our family holds a rummage sale. I have to justify my pricing system to my husband by explaining that no matter how low you mark an item，someone will always want to buy it for less.每年，我家都要有一次弃物甩卖。
我总是要给我丈夫讲授着我的价格观—不管你把价钱标得多低，有些人总是想再少付一点儿。
At our last sale, one customer proved my point. She approached me, carrying an item that she mistakenly believed was priced at one dollar. "would you take 75 cents for this?"she asked.我们最近的一个甩卖，一个顾客证实了我的观点。
这位顾客拿着一件东西朝我走来，她错误地以为这件东西的标价是一美元，说:“我出75分行吗?”"Sure,"I replied,”but it's only marked a quarter.”“当然可以，”我答道:“实际上它的标价是25美分。
”"Oh,"she responded. "Then would you take a dime?"她反应还挺快:“那我出10美分吧。
”关于初中英语小笑话篇2When I came home from the State University of Mew York at StonyBrook sporting a fashionable，s}rper-short hair-cut，my father teased rne all the way to dinner at a local diner.”You look like a boy，”he said.”I sent a daughter away to school and I got back a son.”我从斯多尼布鲁克的纽约州立大学回家时剪的是一种时髦的超级短头。
初中英语幽默笑话
初中英语幽默笑话“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。
”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。
下面店铺为大家带来初中英语幽默笑话，欢迎大家阅读!初中英语幽默笑话1：Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?""A kid bit me," replied Ivan."Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother."I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。
他妈妈问，“发生了什么事?”“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。
“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。
”初中英语幽默笑话2：A father said to his sons: "Tomorrow your mother is going to bake a pie. Who is going to eat it?"The oldest son replied: "Father, I’ll eat it all!"The father then said: "Tomorrow Im going to butcher a pig. Who is going to eat it?"The same son answered: "Father,Ill eat it all!"The father added: "Tomorrow, we are going to plough the field. Who is going to plough?"The oldest son answered again: "Its always me, always me. Now its someone elses turn to volunteer!"一位父亲对他的儿子们说：“你们的妈妈明天要烙一张馅饼，谁要吃呢?”大儿子说：“爸爸，我要把它都吃了。
初二好笑的英语笑话带翻译英语笑话100篇带翻译
初二好笑的英语笑话带翻译英语笑话100篇带翻译初二好笑的英语笑话带翻译篇一A man went into a deli shop and took a seat at the lunch counter.有一名男子走近一家熟食店，在吃午餐的柜台旁选了一个位置。
“Give me corned beef sandwich,”he ordered.他点餐时说：“给我来个腌牛肉三明治。
”“Corned beef sandwich is not on the menu,but I can give you a sandwich with corned beef in it,like our midnight Special.”“菜单上没有腌牛肉三明治，但是我可以给你一个里面有腌牛肉的三明治，像是我们的午夜特餐。
”;”What's a Midnight Special?““午夜特餐是什么?””A triple decker with cornedbeef,tongue,bologna,tomato,lettuce,onion,pockle andmayonnaise,on toaste d raisin bread.““有三层，里面是腌牛肉、牛舌、熏香肠、蕃茄、莴苣、洋葱、腌泡菜，还有美乃滋的三层烤葡萄干面包。
...”Could you just place a piece of corned beef between two slices of white bread and serve it tome on a plate?“”你可不可以在两片白面包中间只放一片腌牛肉，装在一个盘子上端给我吃?”“Why,sure!”Then,turning to the sandwich man ,“哦，当然可以。
啦!”接着他就转向制作三明治的人，he sang out:“One Midnighet Special.Make it one deck,hold thetongue,bolgna,tomato,lettuce,onion,pickle and mayonnaise,and make the raisinbreadwhite,untoasted!”大声喊出：“一个午夜特餐。
初中英语幽默笑话三则
初中英语幽默笑话三则“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。
”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。
下面店铺为大家带来初中英语幽默笑话三则，希望大家喜欢!初中英语幽默笑话1：A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain; and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party after all. In as much as her husband didn't know what costume she'd be wearing, she thought she'd have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she wasn't around.She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every chick he could, getting a little kiss here and a warm squeeze there. His wife went up to him and being rather seductive herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to this new babe who had just arrived.She let him do whatever he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and they did it all! Zowie! Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would have for hisbehavior.She was sitting up reading when he came in. She asked how the evening had been? He said "Oh, the same old thing. You know, I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"He replied, "You know, I didn't dance even one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening.But I'll tell you...from what I heard, the guy I loaned my costume to, sure had a real good time!"妻子睡了一小会儿后觉得自己好多了。
初中英语小笑话
初中英语小笑话笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。
小编精心收集了初中英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!初中英语小笑话篇1Stan: I won 92 goldfish.斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。
Fred: Where are you going to keep them?弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们?Stan: In the bathroom.斯丹：浴室。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办?Stan: Blindfold(蒙眼睛) them!斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛!初中英语小笑话篇2Distributing chewing gum to the passengers, the stewardess explained it was to keep their earsfrom popping. When the plane landed, one of the passengers rushed up to her and said, "I'mmeeting my wife right away. How do I get the gum out from my ears?"当空中小姐给乘客们发口香糖的时候，她解释说口香糖有助于他们防止耳鸣。
飞机着陆后，一位乘客跑到这位空中小姐面前，说道：“ 我马上就要见到我妻子了。
我怎么才能把口香糖从耳朵里面取出来呢?”初中英语小笑话篇3One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered.“ May I speak to your parents? ”“ They'rebusy. ”“ Oh. Is anybody else there? ”“ The police. ”“ Can I speak to them? ”“ They're busy. ”“Oh. Is anybody else there? ”“ The firemen. ”“ Can Ispeak to them? ”“ They're busy. ”“ S o let meget this straight -- your parents, the police, and the firemen are there, but they're all busy?What are they doing? ”“ Looking for me. ”电话铃响了，小男孩接了电话。
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初中英语短笑话
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“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。
”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。
笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。
下面我为大家带来，欢迎大家阅读!
1：
Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?
Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go
Slow".
汤姆的借口
老师：汤姆，您为什么每天上学迟到?
汤姆：我每次路过拐角，一个路标上面写着："学校----慢行。
"
2：
Mother sent Tommy to the store across the street to buy a good box of matches. When Tommy came back, mother asked him,” Did you buy a good box of matches?”
“Yes, Mum.” Tommy replied,” I have tried them all.”
妈妈让汤米去马路对面的商店里买一盒好用的火柴。
汤米回来后，妈妈问他，“你买的是好用的火柴吗?”
“是的，妈妈。
”汤米回答，“我把它们都试过了。
”
3：
, what was the name of the last station our train stopped at?
bother me. I don’t know. Don’t you see I’m reading?
, it’s too bad if you don’t know. Little brother got off there.
汤姆:“妈妈,我们这火车停过的上一站叫什么名字?”
母亲:“别打扰我,我不知道。
没看见我在看书吗?”
汤姆:“哇,你不知道就太糟了,弟弟在那站下了车。
4：
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。
他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿?
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。