彼此竭尽全力--双语幽默笑话
英语爆笑小笑话带翻译超搞笑
英语爆笑小笑话带翻译超搞笑英语爆笑小笑话：Goethe's ToleranceGoethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said, I'll never make way for a fool. But I will, with that Goethe retreated aside.一次，歌德正在魏玛一个公园的一条狭窄小道上散步，碰巧他遇见一个对他怀有敌意的评论家。
两人都停了下来，彼此相互对视。
接着评论家说道：我从来不给傻瓜让路。
可我给，说完歌德退到了一边。
英语爆笑小笑话：Good SightLawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the sun, and they tell me it's about ninety-three million miles away.律师：你说你离事故现场约有35英尺，你能看清多远的东西?证人：这么说吧，早上起床后我看见太阳，别人告诉我这大约有9300万英里远。
英语爆笑小笑话：拿破仑病了Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year."He's a good boy," said Jack's father, "and if you let him pass this time, I'm sure he'll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.""No, no, that's quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn't know!""Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack's father. "You see, I'm afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."杰克到一所大学去学历史。
搞笑英文段子带翻译
下面是一些搞笑的英文段子，附带中文翻译，希望能给大家带来一些欢乐。
1. What do you call an alligator in a vest?
你怎么称呼穿着马甲的鳄鱼？
An investigator.
侦探鱼。
2. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
清洁工从壁橱里跳出来时说了什么？
“Suppliesu get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
如果你把雪人和狗交叉，会得到什么？
Frostbite.
冻伤。
6. What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?
青蛙的车出故障会发生什么？
It gets toad away.
它会被拖走。
7. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
海鸥为什么不飞越海湾？
Because then they’d be bagels!
因为那样它们就会成为贝果！
希望这些段子能给你带来欢乐，不过记得要根据具体情况来使用，要适时适地讲笑话哦！
为什么骷髅不互相打架？
They don’t have the guts.
因为它们没有胆量。
3. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?
如果你把雪人和吸血鬼交叉，你得到什么？
Frostbite.
冻伤。
4. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
正能量的幽默英语笑话大全
正能量的幽默英语笑话大全近年来在互联网上流行起一种新的语言现象——冷笑话。
冷笑话是后现代主义思潮在语言中的一种反映形式。
店铺整理了正能量的幽默英语笑话，欢迎阅读!正能量的幽默英语笑话篇一Waste or SaveFather: Oh, Jack, you have slept away the whole morning. Don't you know you are wastingtime?Jack: Yes, Dad. But I've saved you a meal, haven' I?浪费还是节约父亲：噢，杰克，你又睡了一上午。
难道你不知道你这是在浪费时间吗?杰克：我知道，爸爸。
可我还给您节省了一顿饭呢，是不是?正能量的幽默英语笑话篇二Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physicianmotioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway."Your husband is very sick, " the doctor said, "but there are three things you can do to ensurehis survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-freeenvironment , and don't complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him everyday.On the drive home the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?""I'm sorry, " she said, "but you're not going to make it."一个人得了重病，妻子伴随他去看医生。
超短的英语笑话带翻译笑死
超短的英语笑话带翻译笑死一直以来民间的笑话、笑料题材，比比皆是，可以汇编成专集。
小编精心收集了超短的英语笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!超短的英语笑话带翻译篇1Two boys are talking with each other.两个孩子正在交谈。
"You see, in the old times there were no electricity, no radios, no televisions. How could ourancestors survive?"“你想，古代没有电，没有收音机，也没有电视。
我们的祖先怎么能活着呢?”"So they all died."“所以他们都死了。
”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇2Jenny's papa bought her a pair of new trousers, but it couldn't be worn as it shrank in the wash. Her mother got angry.詹妮的爸爸给她新买了一条裤子，但刚一下水就缩得不能穿了。
她的妈妈非常生气。
But Jenny said. "Mama, I can wear it if you have me a bath."詹妮却说：“妈妈，你给我洗个澡，我就能穿了。
”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇3The neighbor often borrowed my inflator.邻居经常借我家的打气筒。
One day, my four-year-old daughter suddenly told me:"Papa, what shall we do if the air of our inflator is used up?"有一天，4岁的女儿突然告诉我说：“爸爸，我们的打气筒里面的气用完了怎么办?”超短的英语笑话带翻译篇4"Mama, why does the puppy drink the water in the slot?"“妈妈，小狗为什么要喝水沟里的水?”"Because it's thirsty."“因为它渴了。
英语双语幽默冷笑话3篇
英语双语幽默冷笑话3篇有时候笑话不一点是让你哈哈大笑的，今天小编就给大家分享一下英语的笑话，大家一起看看吧A Good BoyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents."What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?""I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered."You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?""She is the one who sells the candy."Goldfish 金鱼Stan: I won 92 goldfish.斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。
Fred: Where are you going to keep them?弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们?Stan: In the bathroom.斯丹：浴室。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办?Stan: Blindfold(蒙眼睛) them!斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛!英语幽默冷笑话One night just before Valentine's Day a woman had a lovely dream about a beautiful necklace.When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it could mean?""You'll find out on Valentine's Day." he said with a knowingsmile.On Valentine's Day, the man gave his delighted wife a beautifully wrapped package.Excitedly, she opened it, only to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams".情人节前一天，一个女人做了个项链的梦。
英语笑话带翻译双语
英语笑话带翻译双语English Jokes with Translation: A Collection of Humorous Anecdotes。
Humor is a universal language that can bring people together and lighten up the mood. In this article, we have compiled a collection of English jokes with translation for our readers to enjoy. These jokes are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone and make you laugh out loud. So, sit back, relax, and let the humor begin!1. A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks, "Why do you have a parrot?" The man replies, "He's a great conversationalist." The parrot then says, "Yeah, and I can also sing." The bartender asks, "Really? What can you sing?" The parrot replies, "Anything you want, as long as it's '99 Bottles of Beer on theWall'."Translation: 一个男人带着一只鹦鹉走进酒吧。
爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译
爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译近年来,冷笑话作为一种新兴的语言现象在网络、杂志上十分盛行。
我细心收集了爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译：还没那么急Looking very unhappy, a poor man entered a doctors consulting-room. "Doctor,' he said, "you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago.' "Good heavens, man!' said the doctor. "Why have you waited so long? Why dont you come to me on the day you swallowed it?' "To tell you the truth, Doctor,' the poor man replied, "I didnt need the money so badly then.'一个看起来很难受的穷人走进大夫的诊室。
"大夫!' 他说，"帮帮我!一个月前我吞了一分硬币!' "天哪，' 大夫说，" 早干嘛去了?你当时怎么不来看?' "实话告知您吧，大夫，'穷人说，"我当时还不缺钱!'爆笑的英语笑话大全带翻译：老夫妻吵嘴A couple of codgers got into a quarrel and came before the local magistrate. The loser,turning to his opponent in a combative frame of mind, cried: Ill law you to the CircuitCourt.一对性情乖僻的老夫妻发生了争吵，始终闹到地方法官那里。
爆笑的英语笑话带翻译欣赏
爆笑的英语笑话带翻译欣赏笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。
透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。
店铺整理了爆笑的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!爆笑的英语笑话带翻译：My Boss and IWhen I take a long time, I am slow. When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. When I don't do it, I am lazy. When my boss doesn't do it, he is too busy. When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart. When my boss does the same, that is initiative. When I please my boss, I am ass-kissing. When my boss pleases his boss, he is co-operating. I do good, my boss never remembers. When I do wrong, he never forgets.老板和我我做事情花了长时间，是效率低; 老板做事情花了长时间，是深思熟虑。
我没有做完事情，是懒惰; 老板没有做完事情，是太繁忙。
没有人告诉我的事情我做了，是自作聪明; 老板做了同样的事情，是首创。
我取悦老板，是献媚; 老板取悦他的老板，是合作。
我干得好，老板从来不会想起; 我干得不好，老板从来不会忘记。
爆笑的英语笑话带翻译：Guns Buried in the GardenAn old man lived alone in Northern Ireland. His only son was in prison. The old man wanted to plant some potatoes in his garden but he didn't know anyone who would help him plow up the garden.He wrote to his son about it, and received this reply, "For HEAVENS SAKE, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!"At 4 AM the next morning, a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns.Confused, the man wrote to his son telling him whathappened and asking him what to do next.His son's reply was: "Just plant your potatoes."埋在花园里的枪一个老人独居在北爱尔兰，他的独生子正在坐牢。
英语幽默笑话故事带翻译
英语幽默笑话故事带翻译篇一：英语短文笑话(带翻译)1、How much English can you speak?"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my client to be accused of theft. He arrived in New York City a week ago and barely knew his way around. What's more, he only speaks a few words of English."The judge looked at the defendant and asked, "How much English can you speak?"The defendant looked up and said, "Give me your wallet!"中文翻译"法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。
他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。
而且，他只会说几个英语单词。
"法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文？"被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我！"2A husband, proving to his wife that women talk more than men, showed her a study which indicated that men use on average only 15000 words a day, whereas women use 30000 words a day. She thought about this for a while and then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say.He said, "What?"丈夫给妻子看了一项调查结果，为了向她证明女人比男人啰嗦。
英语笑话带翻译爆笑
你怎么称运用了音近字的幽默效果，让人在语言的玩味中得到欢乐。
通过学习这些英语笑话，不仅可以轻松缓解学习压力，还能够提升我们对英语语言的敏感度、培养我们的幽默感。因此，学习英语笑话是非常有趣的一种学习方式。希望大家在学习英语的过程中可以多多尝试，感受不一样的英语魅力。
英语笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是人们生活中不可或缺的一部分，它可以让人放松心情，快乐心情。而在学习英语的过程中，学习一些英语笑话不仅可以帮助我们更好地理解语言，还能增加学习的乐趣。下面就给大家介绍一些经典的英语笑话，以及它们的中文翻译，一起来感受一下英语幽默的魅力吧！
1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
4. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts.
为什么骷髅不互相打架？
它们没有胆量。
这个笑话利用了“guts”（胆量）和“guts”（内脏）的双关语，十分巧妙地将内脏和勇气联系在了一起，给人一种突如其来的幽默感。
5. What do you call fake spaghetti?
Because it was two-tired!
为什么自行车站不起来？
因为它两个轮胎都平了！
这个笑话使用了双关语，将“tired”（疲倦的）和“tired”（轮胎瘪了）进行了巧妙的结合。这样的笑话不仅能够让人忍俊不禁，还能让学习者在欣赏笑话的同时加深对于英语语言的理解。
2. What did one wall say to the other wall?
“I’ll meet you at the corner.”
短的英语幽默笑话带翻译
短的英语幽默笑话带翻译笑一笑十年少，有时候正儿八经的说笑话却觉得不好笑，可是一个很冷的笑话却能让自己笑良久，你有这样的经历么?现在，一起来开心爆笑下吧!短的英语幽默笑话带翻译(一)The warden of the prison felt sorry for one of his inmates because every weekend on Visitor’s Day, most of the prisoners had family members and friends coming, but poor George always sat alone in his cell.So one Visitor’s Day, the warden called George to his office and said, "I notice you’ve never had any visitors, George." Sympathetic, he put his hand on George’s shoulder. "Tell me, don’t you have any friends or family?"George replied, "Oh, sure I do, Warden. It’s just that they’re all in here!"典狱长对狱中一位囚犯深感同情，因为每逢周末的探访日，大多数囚犯都有家人或朋友来访，但是可怜的乔治总是孤伶伶地坐在自己的囚室中。
因此在一个探访日，典狱长把乔治叫到办公室说：“乔治，我注意到从来没有人来探望过你。
”他满怀同情地把手放在乔治的'肩膀上：“告诉我，你没有任何朋友或家人吗?”乔治回答：“喔!当然有，典狱长，只不过他们全都在这里面!”短的英语幽默笑话带翻译(二)Once there was a king. He likes to write stories, but his stories were not good. As people were afraid of him, they all said his stories were good.One day the king showed his stories to a famous writer. He waited the writer to praise these stories. But the writer said his stories were so bad that he should throw them into fire. The king got very angry with him and sent him to prison.After some time, the king set him free. Again he showed him some of his new stories and asked what he thought of them.After reading them, the writer at once turned to the soldie rs and said: “ Take me back to prison, please.”国王和他的故事从前有一个国王，他喜欢写故事，但是他写的故事很不好。
轻松幽默双语笑话
轻松幽默双语笑话轻松幽默双语笑话1：my two sisters and i were all away at various colleges at the same time. one day，after facing too many crisises and tired of being treated just another undergraduate，i phoned home for some consolation and understanding of my unique problems.我和两个妹妹同时离开家去不同的大学读书。
经历了太多的危机，也厌倦了受到与其他大学生的对待之后，有一天我给家里打了个电话，就我独有的问题寻求安慰和理解。
when my dad answered, i immediately launched into my litany of frustrations with college iifeas i paused to catch my breath, he said,"ok,honey now, first of all, who isthis?”爸爸接起电话后，我立刻开始历数我大学生活中的挫折。
当我停下来歇口气时，爸爸说:“好啦，亲爱的……现在，首先告诉我，你是哪一个?”轻松幽默双语笑话2：a group from chicago spent a weekend gambling in las vegas. one of the men on the train won$100，000. he didn’t want anyone to know about it，so he decided not to return with others，but took a later plane home，arriving back at3 am.周末，有一个从芝加哥来的旅行团在拉斯维加斯赌钱。
英语笑话：DoWhatYouCan尽力而为就好
英语笑话：DoWhatYouCan尽⼒⽽为就好英语笑话:Do What You Can 尽⼒⽽为就好 ⼀、In a courtroom, the judge sentenced a criminal to thirty years in prison and the prisoner said, "But Sir, I won’t live that long!"So the judge replied, "Don't worry, just do what you can!" 在法庭上，法官宣判某个罪犯要服三⼗年徒刑。
犯⼈说：“不过庭上，我活不了那么久啊!”法官说：“别担⼼!你尽⼒⽽为就好。
” ⼆、A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read, "Here lies John Kelly, a lawyer and an honest man.""How about that!" he exclaimed. "They've got three people buried in one grave." 有⼀个⼈参观墓地时见到⼀块墓碑上写着：“在这⾥安息的是约翰凯利，⼀个律师，⼀个诚实的⼈。
”“这是怎么回事!”他叫了起来。
“他们在⼀个坟墓了埋了三个⼈。
” 三、A newspaper once carried an editorial which stated bluntly(坦率地) that half the city council were crooks. Under penalty of arrest, the editor issued following retraction(撤销) : Half the city council aren't crooks. ⼀次，⼀份报纸刊登了⼀篇社论，直接指出市议会⾥有⼀半⼈是骗⼦。
简单的短一点的爆笑英语笑话带翻译_英语散文
简单的短一点的爆笑英语笑话带翻译_英语散文An elderly couple goes to Burger King, where they carefully split a burger and fries.A trucker takes pity on them and offers to buy the wife her own meal."It's all right," says the husband. "We share everything."A few minutes later, the trucker notices that the wife hasn't taken a bite."I really wouldn't mind buying your wife her own meal," he insists."She'll eat," the husband assures him. "We share everything."Unconvinced, the trucker implores the wife, "Why aren't you eating?"The wife snaps, "Because I'm waiting for the teeth!"一对老夫妇在汉堡王餐厅吃饭，他们小心翼翼地将汉堡和薯条分成两份。
一个卡车司机非常同情他们，就提议想给老太太单独点一份。
“没关系的。
”老先生说，“我们分享一切。
”几分钟后，卡车司机注意到老太太还没动口吃一点东西。
他再次对老先生说，“我真的不介意请您妻子吃一顿……”“她会吃的，”老先生向他保证，“我们分享一切。
”司机不太相信，恳求老太太，“你为什么不吃一点?”老太太咂咂嘴，“我在等他的假牙。
简短英语笑话带翻译大全
简短英语笑话带翻译大全笑话是现代社会发展最快的一种口头文学体裁,它体现了某一民族行为中最深刻的和潜意识中的观点;笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。
店铺整理了简短英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!简短英语笑话带翻译：Talking clockWhile proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into theden(私室，贼窝) . What is the big brass gong(锣) and hammer for? one of his friends asked. That is the talking clock, the man replied. How's it work?Watch, the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!会说话的钟一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓，甚是得意。
那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?他的一个朋友问他。
那玩意儿厉害了，那是一个会说话的钟，学生回答。
这钟怎么工作的，他的朋友问。
看着，别眨眼了，那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子，拼命地敲了一下，声音震耳欲聋。
突然，他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫，别敲了，你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!简短英语笑话带翻译：Your Coat Is on FireThe master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count fifty before saying anything important, and one hundred if it was very important.The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!您的大衣着火了老师为了让学生记住先思考后发言，告诉他们在说出重要事情之前先数到50，如果是特别重要的事情，要先数到100。
爆笑英语小笑话带翻译
爆笑英语小笑话带翻译爆笑英语小笑话带翻译（精选5篇）笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。
笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。
以下是店铺精心收集了爆笑英语小笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习！爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇1While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(烦躁，发牢骚) andjabbering(快而含糊地说) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.The man's wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."有个人生病了。
他的妻子请了一位医生来给他治病。
医生在给他治疗的'时候，他的妻子一直大惊小怪，神神叨叨地紧张不安。
医生对她说：“你的丈夫必须绝对休息和保持安静。
” 然后他就留下了一些。
她问医生：“什么时候给我丈夫吃这些药呀！”医生回答说：“不用，这些药不是给他吃的，是给你吃的，你需要。
”爆笑英语小笑话带翻译篇2She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."有个女人给她的丈夫买了生日礼物。
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
2. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
怎么让纸巾跳舞呢？你往上放点音乐
3. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
英文笑话带翻译爆笑
笑话是生活中的调剂品，能够给人带来欢乐和放松。而英文笑话更是不同国家和地区都能理解的笑话形式，让人们在跨国交流中也能共享欢乐。下面就给大家带来一些经典的英文笑话，并附上中文翻译，一起来欣赏一下吧！
1. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.
你怎样称呼不是你的奶酪呢？墨西哥煎玉米饼奶酪。
6. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
我告诉我妻子她应该接受自己的错误，她给了我一个拥抱。
以上是一些笑话不仅仅能给我们带来快乐，还能锻炼我们的英语听力和理解能力。希望大家在学习英语的道路上能够轻松愉快，充满笑声！
听说游乐场有绑架事件吗？他们醒来了。
4. Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.
为什么骷髅不打架呢？因为他们没有胆量。
5. What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.
英语短句搞笑带中文翻译
通过以上这些句子的中英对照，我们可以更好地理解其中的含义和幽默感。在日常交流中，如果能够恰到好处地运用这种幽默感，无疑会让自己更加受人喜爱。不仅如此，当我们自己情绪低落时，也可以用一些搞笑的句子来调侃自己，让自己在欢笑中释放压力。
"我不是怪人，我是限量版。"
9. "I’m not always late, the clock is just always fast."
"我并不总是迟到，时钟总是走得太快。"
10. "I’m not small, I’m just more cuddle-sized."
"我不小，我只是更适合拥抱而已。"
这些搞笑的英语短句都有着幽默的性格和特点，通过对生活中的琐事和自身特点的调侃，给人一种轻松愉快的感觉。每一个句子都能引起人们的共鸣，因为在生活中大家都会有迟到、被突如其来的雨淋湿、被家里的家具绊倒等等尴尬瞬间。幽默在生活中也是很重要的，能够让我们摆脱一些不愉快，放松心情，更加乐观地看待生活中的挑战。
总的来说，这些英语短句即使是在简短的文字中也蕴含着一种乐观的生活态度，让人忍俊不禁。相信在未来的生活中，如果我们能够时刻保持着乐观的心态，那么生活中的酸甜苦辣都会变得微不足道。让我们在幽默中快乐地面对生活吧！
2. "I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right."
"我不是在争论，我只是在解释为什么我是对的。"
3. "I’m not short, I’m just more down to earth than other people."