英语小故事小笑话
关于英文笑话故事5篇
关于英文笑话故事5篇从文化的角度对英语幽默笑话进行分析,英语教学中对英语幽默笑话的有效利用是培养文化知识的一种重要途径。
下面是店铺带来的关于英文笑话故事,欢迎阅读!关于英文笑话故事篇一a lieMom: "Which banana do you want, Victor?"Victor: "I want that one of the greatest."Mom: "Victor, you should be polite, to have that little one."Victor: "Mom, I must lie to be polite?"妈妈:“你要哪一只香蕉,维克多?”维克多:“我要那只最大的。
”妈妈:“维克多,你应该懂礼貌,要那只小的。
”维克多:“妈妈,难道懂礼貌就必须说谎吗?”关于英文笑话故事篇二Two Birds 两只鸟Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.Teacher: Please tell us.Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.老师:这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。
谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
老师:请说说看。
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
关于英文笑话故事篇三Who Is the Laziest 谁最懒Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?Tom: I don't know, father.Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?Tom: Our teacher, father.父亲:哎,汤姆,今天我跟你们老师谈过,现在我想问你个问题。
短的英语笑话故事大全(13篇)
短的英语笑话故事大全(13篇)短的英语笑话故事篇6 短的英语笑话故事篇7 短的英语笑话故事篇11I worked as a mailman for a short time. However, I am afraid of dogs and I had a lot of trouble.One day I tried to deliver some letters to a big house.I started to open the gate and all of a sudden a huge dog ran towards me.It growled and barked at me, I threw the letters over the fence. The dog picked them up and carried them into the house. The dog was a better mailman than I was!短的英语笑话故事篇12good news and bad newstheres good news and bad news, the divorce lawyer told his client.i could sure use some good news, sighed the client. whats it?your wife isnt demanding that your future inheritances be included in the settlement.and the bad news?after the divorce, shes marrying your father.短的英语笑话故事篇13After my husband,John,and I moved to Michigan fromNebraska,our new friends,proud of their beautiful tree一lined roads,teased us about the Midwests dull,flat,treeless land. When my parents,Nebraska farmers,visited us,I asked them about their trip.What a boring drive,my father replied.Once you get to Michigan, theres nothing to see but trees.。
2023英语讲小笑话,3篇
2023英语讲小笑话,3篇(范例推荐)英语讲的小笑话1雇主和雇员Workman: “Mr. Brown, I should like to ask for a smallrise in my wages.I have just been married."Employer: "Very sorry, my dear man, but I can"t help you. For accidents which happen to our workmen outside the factory we are not responsible."工人:“布朗先生,我想请您给我加一点工资。
我刚刚结了婚。
”雇主:“非常抱歉,老兄,但是我无能为力。
对工人在厂外发生的`事故我们概不负责。
”英语讲的小笑话2第一次开出租车A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath1, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.The driver said, "Look mate, don"t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn"t realize that a little tap would scare you so much." The driver replied, "Sorry, it"s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I"ve been drivinga funeral van for the last 25 years."乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀,想问个问题。
搞笑英语笑话小故事阅读
搞笑英语笑话小故事阅读作为人类所特有的天赋,笑话被认为是日常会话中一种最宝贵的语言形式。
下面是店铺带来的搞笑英语笑话小故事阅读,欢迎阅读! 搞笑英语笑话小故事阅读篇一A new business was opening ... and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.新公司开业了,开业典礼上,经理的一个朋友送他一个花篮。
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,.... "Rest in Peace."经理高声朗读着花篮上的贺卡:“安息吧。
”The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.经理生气极了,打电话找来卖花的人要质问他是怎么回事。
After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied, "Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this: somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, ..花店老板来了,看到这个明显的错误和经理气急败坏的样子,他说:“我真得很抱歉。
但是与其这么生气,你倒不如这样想:有另外一个地方,今天要举办一个葬礼,他们将会收到一个花篮,'Congratulations on your new location!'"留言条上写着‘恭喜你有了新的归属!’”搞笑英语笑话小故事阅读篇二sherlock holmes and watson were out camping one night.歇洛克·福尔摩斯和华森有天夜里去露营。
短的英语笑话故事大全(精选10篇)
短的英语笑话故事大全(精选10篇)笑话具有篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。
大多揭示生活中乖谬的现象,具有讽刺性和娱乐性。
其趣味有高下之分。
接下来由小编为大家整理出短的英语笑话故事大全(精选10篇),仅供参考,希望能够帮助到大家!短的英语笑话故事1Where is your beard?After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family. "But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him. "Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard." "But at least you keep the Sabbath?" "Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath." "But kosher food you still eat?" "Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher." The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Isaac, tell me--you’re still circumcised?"短的英语笑话故事2They Didnt Have Nikes In Those DaysA young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said to him, "Ill make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study the bible a little, and get your hair cut, then well talk about it."A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if he could use the car. His father said, "Son, Im really proud of you. You brought your grades up, studied the bible well, but you didnt get your hair cut!"The young man waited a moment and then replied, "You know dad, Ive been thinking about that. Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair."His father replied, "Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went."短的英语笑话故事3Polly Want a WHAT?This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.""What do they say?" the priest asked."They only know how to say, Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?""Thats terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship.""Thank you," said the lady.The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priests house. The priests two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?"One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered!"短的英语笑话故事4Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to Chinafromher visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directlyfromAmerica."短的英语笑话故事5Midway TacticsThree competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".短的'英语笑话故事6Five Months OlderThe Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s p apers, he was surprised."How old are you?" he said."Eighteen, sir," said John."But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?""Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."短的英语笑话故事7West PointMy father, brother and I visited West Point to see a football game between Army and Boston College. Taking a stroll before kickoff, we met many cadets in neatly pressed uniforms. Several visting fans asked the recruits if they would pose for photographs, "to show our son what to expect if he should attend West Point."One middle-aged couple approached a very attractive female cadet and asked her to pose for a picture. They explained, "We want to show our son what he missed by not coming to West Point."短的英语笑话故事8Be Careful What You Wish ForA couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.Next, it was the husband‘s turn. He paused for a moment, then sa id shyly, "Well, I‘d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.短的英语笑话故事9Napoleon Was IllJack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year."He‘s a good boy," said Jack‘s father, "and if you let him pass this time, I‘m sure he‘ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.""No, n o, that‘s quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn‘t know!""Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack‘s father. "You see, I‘m afraid we don‘t take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."短的英语笑话故事10He Was Only Wrong by TwoJack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren‘t always smart enought to be acce pted by the college.One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after some persuasion, "I‘d better ask him a few questions first."Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn‘t know any of the answers.At last the dean said, "Well, what‘s five times seven?"The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six."The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."。
有关英文小笑话故事大全
有关英文小笑话故事大全笑话是幽默的一个属概念,具有幽默的一切特征。
笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。
店铺整理了有关英文小笑话故事,欢迎阅读!有关英文小笑话故事篇一过分紧张My little girl loves animals,but one day she was bitten by a small field mouse she'd found. She carried it home in her pocket and told me what happened. Worried about rabies,I called our town humane society and was told that the animal would have to be examined, and they'd send someone for it.我的小女儿喜欢动物。
但有一天,她被一只她找到的小田鼠咬了一口。
她把那小动物放在口袋里带了回来,并把所发生的一切都告诉了我。
由于害怕她被传染上鼠痊,我给镇上的私区医院打了电话。
他们告诉我这个小动物应被检查一下,还说他们会派人去把它取走。
When the humane-society truck pulled up,a big man got out,put on a pair of gauntlets and took a capture stick and a big cage from the back of the truck. Trying not to laugh, I handed him a small shoe box containing the mouse.社区医院的卡车停在了我家门口,一个大个子下了车,他戴上了防护手套,从车的后箱里取出一根棍子和一个笼子。
我尽量克制自己不笑出来,把那装有小田鼠的杜盒子递给了他。
"Lady,"he said,seeing my expression, "they only told me it was a wild animal. "“太太,”当他看到我的表情时他说,“他们只告诉我说是好生动物。
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的
英语爆笑笑话5篇带翻译超搞笑的下面是店铺整理的英语爆笑笑话5篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语爆笑笑话一:Hospitality好客The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-piewithout any cheese.由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。
The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate.这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。
过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。
The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You musthave better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?"客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。
你在哪里找到的奶酪?”"In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.“在捕鼠夹上,先生。
”那小男孩说。
英语爆笑笑话二:太黑了,看不见After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?" After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."晚饭后,父亲和母亲都忙着和客人玩麻将,这时母亲忽然想起点儿事来,便对正在看电视的儿子说道:“宝贝,去看看厨房里的灯是不是还开着呢?”过了一会儿,儿子回来说:“妈,厨房里太黑了,我根本就看不见。
英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)
英语幽默笑话(优秀10篇)英国人有他们独特的英式幽默,他们流传的英语冷笑话让人会心一笑,今天,小编给同学们收集、整理了几则特别有趣的英语冷笑话,希望大家能开心开心,一起来看看吧! 篇一一、The little girl did not like the look of the barking dog.It#39;s all right, said a gentleman, don#39;t be afraid. Don#39;t you know the proverb: Barking dogs don#39;t bite?Ah, yes, answered the little girl. I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?一个小女孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
“没有关系,”一位先生说,“不用害怕,你知道这条谚语吗:吠狗不咬人。
;”“啊,我是知道,可是狗也知道吗?”二、One student to another: How are your English lessons coming along?Fine. I used to be one who couldn#39;t understand the English men, and now it#39;s the English men who can#39;t understand me.一位学生对另一位说:“你的英语最近学的怎么样?”“很好,我过去不懂英国人说话,可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。
”三、An old lady who was very deaf and who thought everything too dear, went into a shop and asked the shopman:#39; How much this stuff?#39;#39;Seven dollars, Madam, it is very cheap.#39;The lady said, #39;It is too much, give it to me for fourteen.#39;#39;I did not say seventeen dollars, but seven.#39;#39;It is still too much,#39; replie()d the old lady, #39;give it to me for five.#39;一位耳聋并且总是嫌东西太贵的老太太走进一家商店。
英语搞笑笑话6篇
英语搞笑笑话6篇幽默寓于笑话之中,它是笑话的精料,智慧之所在。
笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古。
下面是店铺整理的英语搞笑笑话,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话一:How can I get into heaven 我怎么才能上天堂"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the poor, would I get into heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class."No!" the children all answered."If I cleaned the church everyday, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?"Again, the answer was, "No!""Well, " I continued, "then how can I get into heaven?"A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"“如果我把房子和车卖了,在车库举行义卖, 并把所有的钱给穷人,我能进天堂吗?”我问主日学校的孩子。
孩子们齐声回答:“不能!”“那如果我每天都打扫教堂,给院子的草坪割草,并且把东西都收拾得干净整洁,我会上天堂吗?”回答还是:“不能!”“好吧,”我继续问, “那我要怎样才能升天堂呢?”一个五岁的男孩儿叫道:“你得死了才行!”英语搞笑笑话二:I Want Her to go NutsMrs. Flinders decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant.""But you're not wearing any of those things.""I know," said Mrs. Flinders." It's in case I should die beforemy husband. I'm sure he'd remarry right away, and I want her to go nuts looking for the jewelry."福林德斯夫人决定让人给她画肖像。
英语笑话故事4篇
英语笑话故事4篇下面是店铺整理的英语笑话故事4篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语笑话故事一Jimmy is three years old.吉米3岁了。
One day, he was gazing out of the window when the night fell. He suddenly shouted, "Mum, mum, come close the window!"一天,他正在窗口观望,夜幕降临。
他突然喊道:“妈妈,妈妈,快来关窗!”"Why? It's not cold, sonny."“为什么?天不冷呀,宝贝。
”"Yes, mum, but the night will come inside."“是的,妈妈,可黑夜会进来。
”英语笑话故事二On one occasion when Mark Twain arrived in London from New York,the Star thought the fact worth recording onits evening placard.But there was another piece of news to bementioned:it was about the Ascot Cup being stolen.Theplacard thus ran: MARK TWAIN ARRIVES. ASCOT CUP STOLEN. Mark Twain,we believe,never heard the last of it.有一次,马克·吐温从纽约起程抵达伦敦访问,《星报》认为这个消息值得登在它的晚招贴上。
但是,还有一条消息也要登上:关于爱斯科杯被盗的消息。
招贴是这样写的:马克·吐温光临爱斯科杯被盗我们相信,马克·吐温从来也没听说过这件事。
简单搞笑的英语小故事
简单搞笑的英语小故事(经典版)编制人:__________________审核人:__________________审批人:__________________编制单位:__________________编制时间:____年____月____日序言下载提示:该文档是本店铺精心编制而成的,希望大家下载后,能够帮助大家解决实际问题。
文档下载后可定制修改,请根据实际需要进行调整和使用,谢谢!并且,本店铺为大家提供各种类型的经典范文,如职场文书、合同协议、总结报告、演讲致辞、规章制度、自我鉴定、应急预案、教学资料、作文大全、其他范文等等,想了解不同范文格式和写法,敬请关注!Download tips: This document is carefully compiled by this editor. I hope that after you download it, it can help you solve practical problems. The document can be customized and modified after downloading, please adjust and use it according to actual needs, thank you!Moreover, our store provides various types of classic sample essays for everyone, such as workplace documents, contract agreements, summary reports, speeches, rules and regulations, self-assessment, emergency plans, teaching materials, essay summaries, other sample essays, etc. If you want to learn about different sample essay formats and writing methods, please stay tuned!简单搞笑的英语小故事简单搞笑的英语小故事(通用9篇)有很多孩子都喜欢听英语故事,特别是一些简单又很搞笑的小故事是很受欢迎的。
英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)
英语小笑话,英语笑话大全(带翻译)下面是编辑整理的英语小笑话,希望能让您捧腹大笑!英语小笑话【一】1、The Fish NetCan you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.翻译:鱼网你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗,安? 老师发问道。
把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。
小女孩回答道。
2、律师和胳膊、宝马A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW."Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer", he whined."You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off"翻译:一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。
“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的”律师哀怨地说。
英语小笑话带翻译
英语小笑话带翻译英语小笑话带翻译(精选12篇)笑话具有篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。
下面是店铺为大家整理的关于英语的小笑话带翻译,欢迎大家的阅读。
英语小笑话带翻译篇1He is really somebody-- My uncle has 1000 men under him.-- He is really somebody. What does he do?-- A maintenance man in a cemetery.他真是一个大人物-- 我叔叔下面有1000个人。
-- 他真是一个大人物。
干什么的?-- 墓地守墓人。
英语小笑话带翻译篇2Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience.At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."一位中国老妇人在美国看望女儿回来不久,到一家市银行存女儿送给她的美元。
在银行柜台,银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票,看是否有假。
小学简单的英语笑话带翻译
小学简单的英语笑话带翻译小学简单的英语笑话带翻译笑话是民族文化及社会生活中不可缺少的一环,从古至今都拥有广大的受众,深受人们喜爱。
下面是店铺带来的小学简单的英语笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!小学简单的英语笑话带翻译篇一DrunkOne day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk.""But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。
这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。
他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。
如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。
” “可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”小学简单的英语笑话带翻译篇二Boy: Hi, didn't we go on dates before? Onec or twice?Girl: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.男孩:嗨,我们之前是不是约会过,是一次还是两次,我忘记了。
英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读
英语搞笑笑话10篇_幽默笑话带翻译阅读多阅读一些有趣的英语笑话,能激起我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享英语搞笑笑话10篇,欢迎大家阅读!英语搞笑笑话篇一An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter,the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said:“Good evening,professor.How are you? “Well,” answered the professor,“I thought I was all right when I left home,but now I don't know what's the matter with me.I've been limping for the last half hour.”有一天,人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走,他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里,另一只脚踩在人行道上。
一个碰见他的学生说:“晚安,老师。
您怎么了?” “啊,”这位老师回答说:“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的,可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。
我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。
”英语搞笑笑话篇二It's His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys.They were brothers,and they often had fights with each other. Last Saturday their mother said to them,“I'm going to cook our lunch now.Go out and play in the garden—and be goo d.” “Yes,Mummy,” the two boys answered,and they went out. They played in the garden for half an hour,and then Billy ran into the kitchen.“Mummy,” he said,“Bobby's broken a window in Mrs.Allen's house.” Mrs.Allen was one of their neighbors. “He's a bad boy,”his mother said.“How did he break it?” “I threw a stone at him,” Billy answered,“and he quickly moved down.”比利和波比都是小男孩。
20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏
20个英语笑话爆笑超短的欣赏一些幽默的英语笑话,能提高我们阅读英语的兴趣,从而提高英语的阅读能力,今天店铺在这里为大家分享20个英语笑话爆笑超短,希望大家喜欢这些英语笑话!20个英语笑话爆笑超短篇一1.Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I'd passed today's exam.""Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied."Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects in my dream tonight," Tom said.在期末考试之前,汤姆告诉他的母亲:“妈妈,我昨天晚上做了一个梦,梦见我通过了今天的考试。
”“不要相信梦,亲爱的。
据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。
”妈妈答道。
“那么,我真希望在今晚的梦中,我的其他功课都不及格。
”汤姆说。
2.On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.在观看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上,幼儿园老师问学生的观后感。
关于英文小笑话故事大全英语的笑话故事简短
关于英文小笑话故事大全英语的笑话故事简短关于英文小笑话故事大全关于英文小笑话故事大全关于英文小笑话故事篇一瞎子的判断Once there was a blind. One day when he was walking, he stepped the head of the dog who was sleeping. The dog barked for a while. The blind man went on for miles, this time he stepped the other dog“s tail, so this dog barked. The blind man had thought that it was the first dog, so he said in surprise, It“s a wonder that the dog is so long. 从前有个瞎子。
一天,他正在行路时踩着了一只正在睡觉的狗的脑袋,狗汪汪汪地叫了一阵。
这人又往前走,这回踩着的是另外一只狗的尾巴,狗又汪汪汪地叫起来。
瞎子以为还是那条狗,惊诧地说:奇怪,这只狗可真够长的。
关于英文小笑话故事篇二我没有看到另外一块Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johnny, and now there is only one piece left. Can you explain thatJohnny: Well, I suppose it was so dark that I didn’t notice the other. 妈妈:约翰尼,我今天早上在橱子里放了两块点心。
现在就剩下一块了。
你能解释一下吗约翰尼:嗯,我想是因为里面太黑我没看到另外那块。
关于英文小笑话故事篇三铅笔he Astronaut Pen During the heat of the space race in the 1960s, the U.S. National Aeronautics and Space Administration decided it needed a ball point pen to write in the zero gravity confines of its space capsules. After considerable research and development, the Astronaut Pen was developed at a cost of approximately $$1 million U.S. The pen worked and also enjoyed some modest success as a novelty item back here on earth. The Soviet Union, faced with the same problem, used a pencil. 在二十世纪六十年代,美国和苏联正处于太空竞赛的白热化阶段,美国航空航天局决定研制一种圆珠笔,以便在太空舱重力为零的环境下仍然可以书写。
英语小笑话故事精选
英语小笑话故事精选笑话能反映出一个民族的价值系统及其对周围世界肯定和否定的态度。
小编精心收集了英语小笑话故事,供大家欣赏学习!英语小笑话故事篇1Twin Lobsters孪生龙虾Once I had achieved success as an entertainer, I wanted to impress my Mom. I brought her to Las Vegas for dinner at Caesar's Palace. Among other items, the menu listed "Twin Lobsters - $45."我当演员取得成功后,想在妈妈面前炫耀一番。
于是,我带着她到拉斯维加斯的凯撒宫去吃饭。
在菜谱中有道菜是“孪生龙虾--45美元。
”"Why don't you order that, Mom?" I asked. "I know how much you like lobster."“你为什么不点那个呢,妈?”我问道:“我知道你很喜欢吃龙虾了。
”She looked at me with the eyes of a skeptic and shook her head. "How do they know they're really twins?"她满眼狐疑地看着我,然后摇了摇头。
“他们怎么知道它们确实是孪生的呢?”英语小笑话故事篇2A Fine Match势均力敌One day a lady saw a mouse running across her kitchen floor. She was very afraid of mouse, so she ran out of the house, got into a bus and went to the shops. There she bought a mousetrap. The shopkeeper said to her, "Put some cheese in it and you will soon catch that mouse."有一天某位女士看到一只老鼠在自家的厨房地板上窜过。
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英语小故事故事一:ParkThere is a park near my home.There are a lot of beautiful trees,fl owers and birds in the park.So many people go to the park to enjoy their weekends.They like walking or having a picnic in the park.But I like flying a kite with my sisiter there.我家附近有一个公园。
哪里有很多美丽的树、花和小鸟。
所以很多人都喜欢到那里去度周末。
他们喜欢在公园里散步或是野餐.但是我喜欢和我姐姐在那里放风筝。
故事二:BedroomI have a small bedroom.There are only a small bed,a small desk and a small chair in the room.And there is a beautiful doll on my blue bed.Everyday I do my homework,read books and play games with the doll in my bedroom.It is small,but it gives me much happiness.我有一间小小的卧室。
那里有一张小小的床、小小桌子和一把小小的椅子。
而且还有一个漂亮的娃娃在我那张蓝色的小床上。
我每天都在房间里写作业,看书和与我的娃娃玩。
虽然房间很小,但是他给了我很多欢乐。
故事三:My fatherMy father is a tall and handsome man.He is a policeman. Everyday he comes back home very late,because he must help the others.He doesn't have time to examine my homework and take me to the park.But I like my father,because he is a good policeman.我的爸爸是一个高大帅气的男人。
他是一个警察。
他每天都很晚才回家,因为他要帮助其他的人。
他没有时间给我检查作业和带我去公园。
但是我仍然很喜欢我的爸爸,因为他是一个好警察。
故事四:Everybody Knows: You can't be all things to all people. You can't do all things at once. You can't do all things equally well. You can't do all things betterthan everyone else. Your humanity is showing just like everyone else's.每个人都知道:你无法为每个人办到每件事。
你无法立刻完成所有的事。
你无法把所有的事都做的尽善尽美。
你无法把每件事都做的比别人好,你只是和其他人一样。
故事五:My little dog can't readMrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog! Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers! Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.我的狗不识字布朗夫人:哦,亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。
”故事六:罗马是什么时候建成的?When was Rome built?Teacher: When was Rome built?Tom: At night.Teacher : Who told you that?Tom: You did. You said Rome wasn't built in a day.教师:罗马是什么时候建成的?汤姆:夜里。
教师:谁跟你这么说的?汤姆:是您。
您说过罗马不是在一个白天建成的.故事七:Where do babies come from? 小孩从哪里来?I asked my father where babies come from.He says you download them from the Internet.我问爸爸小孩是从哪里来的,他说是从网上下载的。
故事八:Where is the egg?Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.Teacher:Then where is the “egg"?Student:In the cake,Sir.鸡蛋在哪里?老师:你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗?学生:可以。
我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。
老师:“鸡蛋”在哪?学生:在蛋糕里,先生故事九:Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket. But a girl asks him,“Why do you buy so many tickets? How many friends do you meet?” “No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.”汤姆是个小孩,他才7岁。
当他去电影院的时候。
那时他第一次去。
他买了张票进去了。
但没过两三分钟他就出来了,然后买了第二张票又进去了。
几分钟后他又出来买了第三张票。
接着两三分钟后他又出来买票。
一个女的问她,“你为什么要买那么多票啊? 你见到了几个朋友?" "没有,我里面没朋友,但是每当我进门的时候一位大的女人老把我的票给剪了"故事十:Child:My uncle has 1000 men under him.Man:He is really somebody.What does do?Child:A maintenance man in a cemetery他真是一个大人物小孩:我叔叔下面有1000个人。
男人:他真是一个大人物。
他是干什么的?小孩:墓地守墓人。
故事十一:Mr. Smith: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.Waiter: Yes, sir, I know---it's the heat that kills it.史密斯先生:服务员,我的汤里有一只死苍蝇.服务员:是的,先生,我知道了,它是被烫死的.故事十二Son: Dad, give me a dime.Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?Son: I guess you're right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you?儿子:爸爸,给我一角钱。
父亲:儿子,你不认为你已经长大了,不该再老是一角一角地要钱了(该自立了),不是吗?儿子:爸爸,我想你是对的,那给我一块钱行吗?故事十三“I'm sorry ,Madam ,but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”“Twenty d ollars! Why ,I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”“Yes,but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”“对不起,夫人,为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。
”“20美元!为什么?不是说好只要4美元。
”“是的,但是你的孩子大喊大叫,把另外四个病人吓跑了。
”故事十四:A Good BoyLittle Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy."好孩子小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。
“你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。
“再给你两分钱。