三打白骨精英语话剧搞笑剧本附中文

J: Look,(伸食指)how many? 看，这是几？ T:Two…..(晕乎乎地) B3:Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3) 孙悟空，游戏结束了！ B3: (看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!!(哭喊) 噢……女儿，老婆子！谁干的？！！！ S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打) 妖怪，我要打死你！ T: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住 )You have killed three lives! 你，你……你已经伤了三条人命了！ S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster! 不，他们不是人！都是妖怪变的！ T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!! 妖怪？你才是妖怪！你走，不要再让我看见你！！



S: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看） 没问题！ （白骨精躲在一旁偷看） J: This is…..? S: Electric net! I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it! 伏魔圈！只要待在里面，就没有妖怪能接近！ T: Em……ok，we will stay in it! 嗯……好的，我们会呆在里面的！ S: Bye!(飞走) 俺老孙去也。 T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》 我们斗地主吧！ B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1) 哈哈！伏魔圈？太小儿科了吧。 B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you? 我也可以玩吗？





J: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against landowner and three people are enough. 不好意思，姑娘。我们在斗地主，三个人够了。 B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb! 噢，机会来了！炸弹！ T: Bomb?(打出) B1: Double King! 王炸！ T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a boss-hand. Come in and teach me! 喔…我赢了！嗯…，姑娘，你是老手吧。进来教我！ S: (回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打) 啊，妖怪！ B1: （倒)Ah…… 惨叫声 T: (气愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher! 悟空！你在干嘛！她是我的师傅! S: She is a monster! 她是妖怪！
Three Times’ Beating Mon源自文库ter.
三打白骨精
T:唐僧(A) S:孙悟空 (B) E:猪八戒(C) J:沙僧(D) B:白骨精(E) B1:B变成村姑 B2:B变成太婆 B3:B变化成老头








T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now? 阿弥陀佛，我们这是到哪了？ S: Bajie,map! 八戒，地图！ E: (摸出，递给S) S: Look,boss (凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E） 师傅，请看。 T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, don’t bring these pictures of beautiful girls! 八戒，我跟你讲了多少次了，不要带这种美女的图片！ E: Oh, boss!Forgive me。(伸手拿回) 哦，师傅！原谅我吧。 T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west 为师先替你保管，到西天了再给你。





S: (悲，离去)（音乐，营造 “假”悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未 了》 J: boss, brother Monkey is....... 师傅，猴哥这是…… T: Don't mention that guy any more! 不要再提他了！ B: (出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走) T: （惊）You are...... B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退) 唐僧，你好愚蠢！ B: (抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha...... 我要吃你的肉，哈哈哈哈…… S: (悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕)A thousand years later. T: Wukong? 悟空 E: Oh,Brother Monkey!（猴哥） J: Our hero is back!





T: Nonsense!(深呼吸) S: Oh,please don’t…… 噢，师傅，别…… T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱) 太晚了！ Once more……(紧箍咒) S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头) T: (呛住，咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you! 悟空，为师早就跟你讲了！（不要乱杀生） B: (真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆) 哼!孙悟空，让我教训一下你！ B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter? （长老）请问，你们见过我女儿没？ T: Daughter?...(连忙挡住尸体)No,sorry! S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell! 好你个妖怪，我打死你！ E&J: Are you Ok, boss?(扶T) 师傅，你还好吧？









T: I,I can't understand......What happened? 发生什么事了？ S: Boss,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you! 师傅，你应该提高一下智商了！这个妖怪为了骗你变 化成三个模样！ T: How,how did you find out? 你怎么发现的？ S: (沉默).......Monkey's intuition(直觉) ……猴子的直觉。 T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不 理)I'm sorry(小声) 悟空，这次是为师错怪了你，对不起！ S: What? T: I'm sorry. S: Em? Louder,please? 嗯？麻烦您大声点行吗？ T: I......am......sorry..... (S 捂耳)






E: But…… 但是…… T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map? 阿弥陀佛，色即是空，空即是色！地图？ E: (递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So. 给，嗯……我们已经到白虎山了！哎呀，我走不动了！ 再说，我这肚子也饿了。 S: Fat Pig! 肥猪! E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will………. 死猴子，有本事再说一遍，再说…… S: You will what(凶相)? 再说你怎么样？






E: I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤). 我帮你抓虱子。 S: Hm! 哼！ T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food? 悟空，我也有点饿了，你能去化些斋饭来吃吗？ E: You see , boss is hungry,too! 你看，师傅不也饿了吗！ T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal! 八戒！不要忘了是谁吃了我的干粮！ J: But boss,if a monster comes while brother monkey is away….. 但是，师傅，假如妖怪趁猴哥不在来了呢…… T: Em…It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea? 嗯…这是个问题。悟空，你有什么办法没？