山东省2020新高考英语大二轮总复习 第四板块 写作 第一部分 应用文写作 第2讲 增加细节的5大高分技巧教案

第二讲增加细节的5大高分技巧
在应用文写作中，增加细节内容的描述是必不可少的。

在信息提纲类写作中，考生一定不能简单地翻译或者仅仅完成所给条目的指定内容；在看图作文中更不能只是轻描淡写图片内容，否则很有可能造成内容不充实、词数要求不达标或者结构不连贯等问题。

适当增加细节内容，能够使习作流畅、丰满，达到应有的表达效果。

列举具体的实例进行补充说明
(2019·浙江卷6月·应用文写作)我仍旧记得……
1．I still remember...
→I still remember what you have devoted to improving my oral English and English writing.
2．(2018·浙江卷11月·应用文写作)这是一个黑色的皮革钱包。

It is a black leather wallet.
→It is a black leather wallet with my ID card,2 credit cards and around 200 dollars in it.
3．(2020·宁波综合检测·应用文写作)我想大体上介绍一下中国的传统文化。

I'd like to talk briefly about Chinese traditional culture.
→I'd like to talk briefly about Chinese traditional culture，especially Chinese painting.
4．(2020·台州市第一次质量预测·应用文写作)现在，我想与你分享春节的一些传统风俗习惯。

Now，I'd like to share with you some traditional customs of the Spring Festival.
→Now，I'd like to share with you some traditional customs of the Spring Festival，the most important festival in China.
5．我想找一个像我一样喜欢旅行的笔友。

I'd like to seek a pen pal who is interested in traveling just like me.
→I'd like to seek a pen pal who is interested in traveling just like me.If possible，we can travel together or share traveling experiences.
6．我是一个充满活力的健康男孩，我非常喜欢体育运动。

I am a healthy boy full of energy so I like sports very much.
→I am a healthy boy full of energy so I like sports very much，especially outdoor activities.Whenever I have time，I'll go hiking or mountain climbing with my
classmates.
7．我要花一些时间和父母在一起。

I'll spend some time staying with my parents.
→I'll spend some time staying with my parents，chatting with them and doing some housework.
[题组过关1]——根据括号内提示完成句子
1．The Internet is playing a more and more important part in our daily life.__________________________(我们不仅能阅读国内外的新闻)，but also get information，send emails and attend online schools.
2．Laura is a standard American style.__________________________(她说一口完美的美式英语)，and that's why I am crazy about her.
3．However，it seems people are unaware of the negative effects of mobile phones on communication.
________________________________________________________________________
(比如，很多人越来越不重视面对面的交流)．
4．However，every coin has two sides，so does the Internet.
________________________________________________________________________
(比如，沉溺于网络也许会影响我们的学习和工作)．
答案：1.We can not only read news from home and abroad
2．She speaks perfect American English
3．For example，many people begin to pay less attention to face­to­face communication
4．For example，being lost in the Internet may affect our study and work
增添与所写信息相关的神态、动作、
结果、心理描写以及背景渲染等内容
(2019·北京卷·书面表达)在农场里，我们帮忙摘西瓜。

On the farm，we helped pick watermelons.
→On the farm，we helped pick watermelons.While working I realised how hard it was to work in the fields under a hot sun.
1．(2020·丽水市检测·应用文写作)当我们爬山时所有人都捡垃圾。

All of us picked up the rubbish as we climbed up.
→All of us picked up the rubbish as we climbed up，helping to beautify the
scenery.(结果描写)
2．我有时去村西的小河游泳。

I went swimming in the river of the west of the village now and then.
→I went swimming in the river of the west of the village now and then.The water in the river is very clear.(背景渲染)
→Weather permitting，I went swimming in the river of the west of the village now and then.(相关背景)
3．旅行了一周后，他回到了家。

After a week's trip，he returned home.
→After a week's trip，he returned home，tired but very happy.(心理描写)
[题组过关2]——根据括号内提示完成句子
1．________________(考虑到这项活动很有意义)，we intend to design a uniform suited to our own class.
2．I'll try my best to make your uncle happy here.
________________________________________________________________________
(我热切地期盼着他来我们城市参观)．
3．At that moment，I became the focus of the whole class and ______________________(充满了自豪和自信)．
4．Finally，I would like to ask a few questions about his personal life，_________________(这一定很有趣)．
5．(2019·河北五个一名校联盟·书面表达)_________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________
(从你的信中得知你已被剑桥大学录取)，I'm more than glad to write to offer my warmest congratulations.
答案：1.Considering the activity is of great value/is meaningful
2．I am eagerly looking forward to his visit to our city
3．was full of great pride and confidence
4．which must be very interesting
5．Knowing you have been admitted to the University of Cambridge from your letter
增加相关信息的时间、地点等内容
1．(2019·北京卷·书面表达)在那之后，你可以去上海。

After that，you can go to Shanghai.
→After that，you can go to Shanghai，where you can stay for a week.
2．(2020·江山市教研二模·应用文写作)作为一个传统，中国学生总是向老师表达感激之情。

Chinese students always like to express gratitude to their teachers as a tradition.
→With Teachers' Day approaching，Chinese students always like to express gratitude to their teachers as a tradition.(增加时间)
3．我要和父母一起去超市购物。

I'm going to do some shopping with my parents in the supermarket.
→I'm going to do some shopping with my parents in the supermarket and won't be back until about 5：00 in the afternoon.(增加时间)
4．我已经带来了你让我归还的两本书。

I have taken with me the two books you asked me to return.
→I have taken with me the two books you asked me to return to the City Library.(增加地点)
[题组过关3]——根据括号内提示完成句子
1．____________________(几分钟过去了)but the whole class was in complete silence.
2．The Chinese Silk Road, _____________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________(起源于今天
的西安，最后到达……的东海岸)the Mediterranean，is well­known to the world.
3．I was attracted by the beauty of the city ________________ (一……就……)I arrived here at 6 o'clock in the morning by plane.
4．(2020·台州市二模·应用文写作)I'd like to invite you to attend our class meeting next week ____________________(如果你有空)．
答案：1.Several minutes passed
2．which starts from today's Xi'an and finally finishes at the east coast of 3．the moment/immediately/as soon as/directly
4．if you are available
适当增加与所给信息相关的原因、条
件、让步、手段、目的等内容
(2019·全国卷Ⅰ·书面表达)我能给参观者介绍中国的绘画技术。

I can introduce Chinese painting skills to visitors.
→I can introduce Chinese painting skills to visitors，which can help them know more about Chinese culture.
1．(2020·舟山市·应用文写作)不久我将成为成年人。

It won't be long before I become an adult.
→It won't be long before I become an adult，so I feel very excited as well as a bit nervous.(引起的结果)
2．(2020·金华市模拟·应用文写作)我们城市将在下个月15—30号举办丝绸之路国际艺术节(Silk Road International Arts Festival)。

The Silk Road International Arts Festival will be held in our city from 15th to 30th next month.
→Aimed to promote international cultural exchange and cooperation among countries along the Silk Road，the Silk Road International Arts Festival will be held in our city from 15th to 30th next month.(分词作状语)
3．假设你是李华，你的英国笔友Henry最近来信询问你高考后的暑假安排。

请根据下面要点写一封回信，说明你的计划，并简述理由。

①休息；读书；②参加社会活动
①I need a good rest.I'll do some reading.
→I need a good rest because I do feel tired after the hard work of all these years.Of course，I'll do some reading for fun，and for knowledge as well.(因果关系)
②I'll take part in some social activities.
→If I have free time，I'll take part in some social activities.(条件状语) →If possible，I'll take part in some social activities.(条件状语)
→I'll take part in some social activities so that/in order that I can know more about the society.(目的状语)
4．Tracy来电话说和你在咖啡屋(Bolton Coffee)的见面取消。

Tracy called，saying that she couldn't meet you at Bolton Coffee.
→Tracy called，saying that she couldn't meet you at Bolton Coffee as she has something important to do.(原因状语)
5．我也帮助邻里的孩子补习英语。

I also helped children in the neighborhood with their English lessons.
→I also helped children in the neighborhood with their English lessons.To my joy，they made rapid progress and their parents thought highly of me.(增添结果)
[题组过关4]——根据括号内提示完成句子
1．We were happy and returned home ________________________ (我们捡完所有的垃圾之后)．
2．I often join in many activities ________________________ (来和其他同学交流开拓我的视野)．
3．____________________________(众所周知)，Earth Hour is an activity which aims at saving energy.
4．(2020·胡州市第一次适应性测试·应用文写作)_________________________________(为了帮助人们了解更多的中国传统文化)，our school is intended to hold a series of activities.
答案：1.after we had finished collecting all the rubbish
2．in order to communicate with other students and broaden my eye
3．As is known to all of us
4．To help people learn more about Chinese traditional culture
结尾适当发挥，写出个人感受、评价、
希望、倡议等
(2019·北京卷·书面表达)回家后，我与父母分享了我的经历。

When I came back home，I shared my experiences with my parents.
→When I came back home，I shared my experiences with my parents.And they were very proud of me.
1．虽然这个暑假我觉得很累，但我为我所做的事情感到很高兴。

Although I was very tired this summer holiday，I felt very happy for what I did.
→Although I was very tired this summer holiday，I felt very happy for what I did because I got a knowledge of farming experience.(个人感受)
2．我想这样的活动是必要的和有意义的。

I think such activities are necessary and meaningful.
→I think such activities are necessary and meaningful，from which I learn that we should help people who are in trouble if possible.(评价)
3．我们坚持坚定的信念：游客对中国的传统文化将会知道的越来越多。

We hold the firm belief that the visitrs will know more about chinese traditional culture.
We hold the firm belief that the visitors will know more about Chinese traditional
culture，so I hope we students should read more books about Chinese traditional culture in our spare time.(希望)
4．作为一个学生，保护我们的学校环境并使它干净是我们的责任。

As a student，it's our duty to protect our school environment and make it clean.
→As a student，it's our duty to protect our school environment and make it clean.So the Chairman of our school suggests our school hold a series of activities to call on students to take action to do it.(倡议)
[题组过关5]——根据括号内提示完成句子
1．________________________________________________________________________ (作为一个专业的篮球运动员)，he is one of China's bestknown athletes.
2．I think Beijing______________________________________________________________ (非常值得再次参观)．
3．In my view，_______________________________________________________________ (不管互联网多么吸引人)，it shouldn't separate us from our loved ones.
4．________________________________________________________________________(通过这
个实验我们得出一个结论)：the temperature doesn't change when ice is melting into water.
5．Let's develop good habits of saving energy in our daily life and _______________________
(尽力为我们的环境做出更多贡献)．
答案：1.As a professional basketball player
2．is well worth a second visit
3．no matter how attractive the Internet is
4．We drew a conclusion through the experiment
5．try to make more contributions to our environment
Ⅰ.按要求对下列句子进行扩充
1．我上课认真听讲。

(增加目的状语从句)
I_listen_to_the_teachers_carefully_in_the_class_so_that_I_can_understand_wha t_the_teachers_say.
2．一年一度的“校园书市”(the campus book fair)目的是提供一个平台。

(增加定语从句)
The_annual_campus_book_fair_aims_to_provide_a_platform_where_students_can_ha ve_a_chance_to_exchange_and_make_use_of_their_books.
3．我经常参加体育锻炼。

(增加目的状语；举例说明)
In_order_to_strengthen_my_body，
I_often_take_part_in_different_kinds_of_exercises_with_my_classmates，
such_as_playing_football，going_swimming_and_playing_badminton.
4．我经常去图书馆阅读。

(增加原因状语和时间状语从句)
Interested_in_reading_books，
I_often_go_to_the_library_to_do_some_reading_when_I_am_free.
Ⅱ.请为下面的短文适当增加细节
Dear Sam，
The College Entrance Examination lasts for two days.The examinees are tested on Chinese，math，the science and arts.We are stressed during the examination and the questions are difficult and complex.
答案：
Dear Sam，
Thank you for your concern.Now I'll tell you something about t he once­a­year College Entrance Examination.
There is no doubt that the examination is very important.It lasts for two days from June 7th to 8th.The examinees are tested on Chinese and math on the first day.The science，arts and English are tested on the second day.We are physically and mentally stressed during the examination and the questions are difficult and complex.But we are full of confidence because we are well prepared.We all believe that the fruits of our efforts will be sweet.。