永恒的爱—斯滕伯格爱的三角原理—精读ppt

passion
Robert J. Sternberg commitment
Leabharlann Baidu
types
Nonlove Liking Infatuated love Empty love Romantic love Companionate love Fatuous love perfect love
intimacy － ＋ － － ＋ ＋ － ＋
elements
passion
commitment
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everlasting = perfect?
There is no such thing as “perfect love”! How to sustain a romantic relationship or
marriage?
Sternberg ---- Triangular theory of love (爱情三角形理论)
• He thought that love includes three parts, that are intimacy、passion and commitment.
Intimacy
perfect love
• *Cultivate the relationship with the one you choose (It's by virtue of working together, of being together, of spending time together, of dedicating one another. This is how two separate "I" become a "we".)
• *Do things together
• *Actively engage ourselves in activities that create love.
*The Golden rule:do not do unto others what you would not have done unto yourself.
• Tal Ben Shahar • Harvard OCP:
Positive Psychology
The speaker Professor TalBen Shahar mentioned some essential things to sustain love.
1.Work hard 2.Open your heart, try to be understood rather than being validated. 3.Allowing conflict in a relationship. You should have a super ordinate goal to solve the conflicts. 4.Love is in the details.
An everlasting love
• Society • Ethics • Complex psychological factors
• Psychology of love(爱情心理学) is a
subject studying psychological phenomena between men and women in love. In other words, it discusses the law of gaining and sustaining love in romantic relationships and marriages, including psychology of love and psychology of marriage.
*The Platinum rule:do not do unto yourself what you would not do unto others
*The Titanium rule:do not do unto those close to you what you would not do unto others who are not so close to you.
5.Don't wait to be asked to give compliments.
6.Communication is important.
7.Positive perception：benefit finding and benefit creating
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Work hard:
• * It is a mistake to focus on finding the right partner. (The finding mindset hurts the relationship.)