文秘英语论文

Learn to Listen — The Key to Effective Communication

1.Introduction

Most misunderstanding that arises in our daily lives occurs because of poor listening habits. Poor listening skills can create serious personal, professional, and financial problems. From the time we get up in the morning to the time we end the day, we are constantly listening to something. Y et most of us give little thought to the role that listening plays in our everyday experiences. Parents and children both complain, “They don’t listen to me.” A similar refrain may be heard from relationship partners, workers and bosses, teachers and students. Y ou may even hear a friend say to you, “Y ou reall y ought to listen to yourself.” As simple as listening appears to be, many of us are not effective or efficient as listeners.

It may surprise you to realize how much of your waking day you spending listening—when you are not talking or reading, you are probably listening to something or someone. Communication scholar Larry Barker and several colleagues found that college students spend nearly half of their communication time listening, almost one-third of it speaking, and less than one-third of it reading and writing(William J. Seiler & Melissa J. Beall, 2002).

What is listening? Listening is a deliberate process through which we seek to understand and retain aural (heard) stimuli. It depends on a complex set of skills that must be acquired and it requires us to make an active, conscious effort to comprehend and remember what we hear (James M. Lahiff & John M. Penrose, 1997). In our environment, from minute to minute, far too many sounds bombard us for us to be able to pay attention to each one. Thus, in listening, we process the external sounds of our environment to select those that are relevant to us, our activities, and our interests. This is not to say that listening is just an external process. It is also an internal process. We listen to the sounds we hear, and we listen to what others say, but we also listen to what we say aloud and what we say to ourselves in response.

2.The functions of listening

Throughout a whole day we have listened to many different people and things for a variety of purposes. Let’s look at each of these functions in greater detail and the listening skills that each requires.

Listening to obtain information

We probably spend most of your listening time listening for information, that is, listening to gain comprehension. We listen as your teacher discusses process, perception, nonverbal and verbal communication, famous speakers, and similar topics in order to learn about speech skills. Each day we listen for information such as news, weather forecasts, sports scores, directions, orders, assignments, names, numbers, and locations (Katherine Adams & Gloria J. Galanes, 2002). Listening to evaluate

Evaluative listening is listening to judge or to analyze information. For example, a car owner who hears a squeak coming from the front end rolls down the window and does some evaluative listening. That is, the owner tries to pinpoint the exact location and cause of the bothersome noise.

A teacher listens to students’ speeches to discriminate between good and poor presentations and to assign grades. In most situations we all should listen critically. We should constantly judge evidence, arguments, facts, and values. We need to ask questions if we hope to be effective listeners (常乐，2004). We are bombarded by messages asking us to believe, accept, or buy things. For our own protection, we must evaluate everything to which we listen.

Listening with empathy

Empathic listening occurs when you listen to what someone else is expecting and seek to understand that person’s thoughts and feelings. It is not sympathy, which means that you feel sorry for the other person. Empathy means you try to understand what is happening to him or her (Pamela Angell & Teeanna Rizkallah, 2003). Most of us find it difficult to avoid making judgments when we listen to someone else’s problems, but that is exactly what we must do if we hope to listen with empathy. Listening empathically can be a healing and soothing process. Empathic listening indicates that we are aware, appreciative, and understanding of another person’s feelings.

3.The effective listening in communication